Using pregnancy to my favour with a nasty colleague?

(11 Posts)
Jojoclaire Wed 03-Aug-16 17:48:07

Thoughts welcome...

I've told my boss, but not the rest of the team that I'm 14 wks. Planning to tell them next week. There's a woman kicking off and bad mouthing me today to others based on the fact I sent her an email to ask her not to throw my stuff out before asking me (reasonable I think?!)

Anyway she's a sneaky one and has stirred before with others, very unprofessional either clients etc. and needs a warning or something. Can I use the pregnancy and associated stress as reason to make a fuss and have it taken seriously? Everyone is at their wits end with her and she's a nasty piece of work but no one does anything about it as she just cries and strops that she's being victimised. It's about time she got a serious warning, but I'm not one to start crying and complaining about stress.

Want it handled professionally but how can I go about it without coming off as being dramatic?

SpaceDinosaur Wed 03-Aug-16 17:51:51

It really does depend Jojo... Are you leaving your shopping in the fridge?! grin

SewSlapdash Wed 03-Aug-16 17:55:00

Please don't use your pregnancy in this manner. All it will achieve is to make life harder for other pregnant women by perpetuating the myth that pregnant employees are a pain in the arse ans should be avoided at all costs.

Absolutely insist that your manager or HR department dealt with it properly but your pregnancy is clearly nothing to do with this.

MyNewBearTotoro Wed 03-Aug-16 18:00:59

I don't really see what your pregnancy had to do with this? She doesn't even know you're pregnant.

If her behaviour is unreasonable and causing you stress then by all means take it further but I don't see how being pregnant is relevant.

flowery Wed 03-Aug-16 18:03:23

What everyone else said. If she doesn't even know you're pregnant how on earth is your pregnancy relevant in this? Just ask your manager to address it, or even consider a formal grievance if that doesn't work or if you feel it's necessary.

heknowsmysinsheseesmysoul Wed 03-Aug-16 18:06:10

This has nothing to do with your pregnancy. If you have a grievance - raise it appropriately and don't associate it with your pregnancy.

As a previous poster mentioned - you'll make life harder for other pregnant employees.

Jojoclaire Wed 03-Aug-16 18:13:13

You're right, it's nothing to do with my pregnancy and I've been professional up to this point, (despite wanting to be sick on a regular basis) so don't want her to be the reason it becomes something negative unnecessarily. Thanks for the voices of reason!

I just don't know how she gets away with it and nothing ever happens, been the same for 3 years and management are too soft. I suppose my thinking was if its a medical thing they have to do something. But no, not my responsibility!

(And no not from the fridge space! Box of my marketing stuff I'd already asked her not to touch that had been stored happily in the same place for a year with no problem.)

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Letseatgrandma Wed 03-Aug-16 18:15:47

I can't really work out what you mean? How could you use your pregnancy to your advantage in this situation? Am I being really slow?

Stillunexpected Wed 03-Aug-16 19:46:14

Am I being really slow? - no several of us are struggling to understand! If this woman's behaviour is worthy of a formal complaint then go ahead and do it! I don't see how adding in the fact that you are pregnant is going to make her behaviour any better or worse or affect the outcome of any complaint. If people have complained previously and got nowhere why do you think that your pregnancy is going to make any difference?! Personally, if I was your manager and thought you were "playing" your pregnancy like this, I would be less than impressed.

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