Bitching in the workplace- it hurts!

(8 Posts)
Tazzyduffy Thu 25-Feb-16 15:49:25

Long story, but don't want to bore everyone! A colleague of mine, X, was in our shared office space, on a shared pc. Another colleague, Y, was out of the room, when X noticed a comment on the screen about herself. It was apparent that Y was sending derogatory comments about X in an email to other ex-colleagues.

X printed the email and also searched her name. In doing so she pulled up multiple nasty, derogatory and untrue emails about herself and also my name was mentioned +++. I get that a lot of this is just work place bitching and to try and rise above it etc, but it hurts. I had no idea that Y felt the way she did about me and also had been emailing management in a way that would question my professionalism. X was extremely distressed about what she had saw and told me as she was having to leave work early due to her upset.

I disagree with X for looking at Y's emails, but it has happened and now I am aware of what is going on and am in the highly difficult position of being aware what another colleague is saying about me and it is absolute slander. Is there anything that I can do about this? I now dread going in to work and am unable to sleep at night due to the knowledge of how others are talking about me.

I have to say I am totally shocked that someone would use their work emails in such an inappropriate manner.

InternationalHouseofToast Thu 25-Feb-16 15:54:18

Y will be setting a password protected screensaver on her PC any time now then? grin

No, X shouldn't have been rummaging, and here would get into trouble for going through someone else's emails, but equally, I don't think you should send work emails that you wouldn't be happy for the person about whom they are written to see. you go round to the recipient's office and talk about them instead

Tazzyduffy Thu 25-Feb-16 16:54:37

In fairness to X I don't think many would not look with they see their name talked about in such a way.

In my situation is there anything I can do about this?

Millionairerow Fri 26-Feb-16 16:23:42

Ha ha a lesson to be learned for everyone concerned but always v tempting to spy. I remember my colleague clearing out someone's inbox cos she was made redundant and that was interesting reading.

Don't get mad, get even. Think of smart ways to show her ineptitude and Mail it to management! Trust no one but keep it professional. You can't choose who you work with. And make sure you make management know what you are doing right by self promotion.

antimatter Fri 26-Feb-16 16:25:42

If you ask HR to investigate how Y is using their email then Y could lose their job next.

Catchuptv Sat 27-Feb-16 22:06:20

Have management spoken to you about your competence? If not - maybe they realise that she is an idiot. I'd be worried if they followed it up - it's obvious - to me - that they don't agree with what she's said.

There's nothing to be gained from knowing what others really think about you unless you can actually think - is it true? Then improve yourself.

The other thing is did you see the printed emails to confirm that you were actually mentioned. How do you know if X isn't making it up that your name was mentioned just to get some support?

Tazzyduffy Sat 27-Feb-16 22:39:23

Yes I saw the printed emails, so sadly true. No issues have been raised by management, so I guess they are not stupid. Is this something I can raise with HR ? I suspect I'm most likely to do nothing and pray for karma!

Catchuptv Sat 27-Feb-16 22:59:03

IMO - it is truly best to leave it - you don't want to be seen as a whiner or as someone who's involved in reading other people's emails which in itself is a bit bad - it's a bit like standing at a door and trying to listen in.

I can understand you're upset but at least now you have warning. Good luck xx

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