Courage to tell boss that work is the only thing which raises my BP

[Redlorry75]

I am 31 wks PG and in the middle of two weeks signed off due to a rocket BP last week. Since being at home everything has gone back to normal.

I was going to start ML at 38 weeks, but have bought this forward to 36 - (have'nt told him yet) as I am so tired and also anxious at the thought of being back at work.

My boss has no female influences in his life and lives for making money - has 2 houses, 2 cars etc!

When at work he likes to have people in his office with him so he can bounce ideas off them and so he can read stuff back to them (even stupid e-mail replies) we all feel this is a waist of our time as the work is piling up while we're stuck in there as a captive (literally) audience.

This puts my BP up, as when I get back to my desk, I find loads of e-mails and missed calls. I love my job and get on really really well with other colleagues and if not for him may even have tried to work up to 40 weeks as before he came it was such a nice calm place to be.

How can I tell him that it's what he asks of me that has pushed my BP up. I actually cry when I talk to anyone about going back to work as I can't stand the thought of having to sit in his office anymore

[Pixiefish]

You may just have to be signed off and start your ML early. Personally I wouldn't tell him that he raises your BP as you will want to work with him again when the baby is here.

My DH is a bit like that- he bounces everything off the people at work and then me in the evening. He wants me to go and work with him but I refused as I'd be mad within a week.

Good luck with everything

[incy]

Could you not call up on Monday and say that your doctor/midwife has suggested that you start yout maternity leave early due to high BP - this way you are taking the 'responsibility' off yourself and to a third party which may make it easier for you (not that you have any need for feeling bad - I just think this may be easier for you). Your doctor could always put this advice in a medical certificate (if you explain what is going on to your doctor) - your boss can't really argue with medical advice. Good luck and don't worry - like everything, once you have said what you need to say your will feel a real sense of relief.

[FillyjonkthePumpkinEater]

you can go on sick leave due to stress/high BP/ whatever, if you can get signed off (and its rare a GP won't sign a pg woman off)

this means you get sick leave and then ML which you are perfectly entitled to do

if you are finding your work stressful and are pg you can ask for a H&s assessment. Things like this are covered. But will be difficult if a small firm with no HR dept.

[Pixiefish]

Unless it's changed since I had dd if you go off up to 11 wks before your EDD then your mat leave will start from that day

[FillyjonkthePumpkinEater]

pretty sure its 4 wks, not 11!

also, it must be a pregnancy related thing which doesn't in fact result from inadequate H&S given you're pg, IYSWIM.

so, i dunno, to take a completely separate scenario. If you had 3 weeks to go and strained your back because a. you were doing heavy lifting and b. you were clumsy due to pg, you would not have to start early leave.

your gp can ask for a h&s check for you, i think, btw.

[incy]

Yes as Filly says it is 4 weeks before EDD that you can be 'sent' by your firm on early maternity leave (but only if the illness is pregnancy related.)

11 weeks before due date is earliest you can start maternity leave.

So at 31 weeks either start maternity leave early (on doctor's recommendations) and get signed off in meantime whilst you give appropriate notice - or (probably better) get signed off with high BP until your maternity leave starts in 5 weeks time.

Sounds as if you normally like your job and will want to return (or at least have the option) so 'blame' the doctor/medical advice/difficult pregnancy rather than your boss for the need for early leave/sick leave (why bother with the confrontation?) - put your feet up and enjoy some hob nobs and daytime telly.

PS Worked until 40 weeks with DS1 to appease 'difficult' boss and was I thanked for it ?! No ! Needless to say will be leaving asap this time. Enkjoy.

[TwigTwoolett]

get a sick note

if your company is any cop they'll have you on sick leave (full pay) until maternity leave kicks in

my company did this .. from 33 weeks

[Redlorry75]

Thanks all,

Have to say I work in H&S and have a low level H&S qualification! My boss has refused to do a H&S risk assessment as he says I know what I am doing!!! Same as he refused to do a RSI assessment for a colleague for the same reasons!

Have got specialist ante-natale apt on the day before I go back afte this bout of sick leave so may raise issue with them I did think about going sick till 36 weeks, when ML gets forced anyway, but thought that was a bit cheeky!
Even though my BP has been brilliant and I have no headaches or dizzyness because I am so at ease.