Work stress

(9 Posts)
pinkstinks Tue 09-Jul-13 19:32:50

Please if anyone can help it would be much appreciated I am at a bit of a loss and feel so low.
I started my job 18 months ago and wa promoted from admin after a few moths to dealing with my own clients. All was going well a few late nights when something unexpected happened but nothing major.
Now I have been given more and more clients my admin left with stress so now I share an admin with someone else. Admin is great but so new and with noone to train her.

My manager is so negative all the time my predecessor had ibs and was signed off in the end when she found a new job. I have been working til at least seven most nights I was asked to cancel my drivin lesson last week leaving me out of pocket an I am only on 18k I don't know what to do I am normally a fighter!
In my one to one meeting which lasted four hours I basically had to justify my job and was constantly criticised I have never said this hut I felt bullied!

I am looking for a new job but worried as I am so low with it all and also I have an 8 week notice period so what employer would wait that long.
There is so much more hut I'm sure you have all gone to sleep! My mum has told me to keep a diary so I am!

NoPartyDay Wed 10-Jul-13 10:23:49

Doing the right thing to get out of this crap job- employer is a bully
Here in Australia we have the Fair Work Ombudsman (look up their website) that can advocate on behalf of employees not paid/treated fairly in some circumstances.
Do you have anything similar in the UK?

hermioneweasley Thu 11-Jul-13 15:55:42

If you are unhappy you should definitely look for a new job. An 8 week notice period is not unusual - if you are the right candiadate, they will wait for you.

In the meantime, is there anyone at work (for example an HR dept) that you can speak to about how you are beng managed?

Champagnebubble Fri 12-Jul-13 15:23:30

What do you think would happen if you raised this with her/him and said how you feel? It would take guts, but I've seen this clear the air really well. Alternatively, does your manager have a manager you feel you could approach? It takes a skilled and good manager to manage these sorts of things but if your manager's manager is good then you could do this. Do explain you don't want to formally make an issue yet but you want to informally sort out the issues in the first instance as it is becoming a real problem and you are stressed. You need to judge the situation here though. If your management aren't good and will just pull together and there is a culture of bullying etc, I hate to say it, this might not be the best route.

Your mum is right, keep notes on what happens. You could also raise a grievance and speak to HR. As an HR person I'd recommend trying to sort things informally as above as i find that's hugely effective but a procedure does exist to sort these issues out so do consider a formal option which can work. Beware once going this route you are in formal realms but sadly it is sometimes necessary. Sadly sometimes people feel their only option is to get a new job too as the organisation and management are bad managers aren't committed to sorting issues out I'm afraid to say.

So sorry you're going through this. Good luck.

pinkstinks Tue 16-Jul-13 23:48:32

Hi all thanks for taking the time to reply it is
Much appreciated. I have been ok work again until half seven tonight.y lines anger is off on holiday for two weeks on Monday so that should relieve some pressure. Last week asked for a meeting with the office manager about my workload and the advice given was to prioritise better.

The head of Hr was present in my 121 and actually called me a gobby cow so I don't really trust going there tbh.

The diary is helping as when I hand my notice in I will say this is why, but so tempted to just quit. Surely I can find a job in 8 weeks? I feel there is no end in sight and I'm feelin a hit low and desperate and dark. I just want a job that a don't dread and I want the constant amxiety and sickness to stop.

Champagnebubble Wed 17-Jul-13 09:18:31

Wow. The head of HR said that? By the way, I'm not sure why HR were in your meeting, I'd never join a one to one unless the meeting were formal and in which case you'd be invited to it and allowed to be accompanied. Sounds very strange.

To tell you the truth it sounds like the situation isn't going to get better. Look for a new job but consider putting in a grievance about the complete lack of disintertest in sorting out issues. It won't necessarily help you, unless you want to take the matter to an employment tribunal or push the matter whilst looking for a new job. It's not the path with the least stress though. Is there someone senior who would care these sorts of things are happening? MD or the like? Of course, it may not be for you, you may just want to find a new job and leave. It saddens me that these things happen.

pinkstinks Wed 17-Jul-13 20:12:28

Thanks champagne, the more people THat agree it is not ok strengthen my resolve! No the MD is fed lines from everyone else and they are all in each others pockets.

Yes I was called gobby and also that I need assertiveness training also they went on about my 'look' the meeting was HR an my line manager an went on for over four hours... I basically had to justify my position. Essentially they are bastards and I need to get out, I'm so tempted to hand in my notice and then k

pinkstinks Wed 17-Jul-13 20:13:58

Oops.
Hand in my notice An then job hunt but it goes against everything up are ever told!!! Also I have been there almost two years and is my most relevant job so would need a good reference. They have form for not talking to people who quit so maybe it would be better! Tbh it is getting me down and I am not a negative person but feel increasingly desperate and action needs to be taken.

NoPartyDay Thu 18-Jul-13 06:40:14

Good luck if you end up moving on.
At least you can be proud you have not called the head of HR a 'gobby cow' (what a seriously demented and completely non-productive statement to make to an employee), or similar, and sunk to her level in retaliation! The sort of person who would be that demeaning to an employee is certainly a nasty piece of work, with serious character flaws. Pretend that you would have loved to stay but had to move out of the area/field of work due to ? another 'calling'/whatever. You could try to stay and apply for loads of jobs, but invest in professional help with your resume/letters of application? Good luck

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