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Not sure what to do

5 replies

WorrySighWorrySigh · 27/03/2013 20:54

I started a new job a few weeks ago. At first it went well but I did notice that the expectations of my role were undefined - it is a new role in the business

My line manager is very keen to pass tasks on to me but with minimal advice on what is expected or how to go about it. My line manager is also quick to criticise and slow to praise. I now feel that nothing I do will ever be good enough. Last night I after I left work I sat in the car and cried. I feel so beaten down by it all.

I spoke to my line manager but there doesnt seem to be a meeting of minds. The long hours and constant criticism are just something I have to put up with.

I dont know what to do next. I am in a probationary period. Notice is one week on either side. If I decide to leave how do I describe this period on my CV? I have been a contractor so I guess it would be possible to describe this as a short term role.

Should I stay or should I go? Does anyone have experience of turning a bad start around or should I move on?

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nellyjelly · 28/03/2013 01:50

On this board at 1.50 am as struggling with an issue at work and can't sleep. No advice about your situation sorry, other than give it a bt more time and try and et oursupport from colleagues in the team? Look for another job and grin and bear the current one. Sounds awful but probably best not to jack it in so quickly.

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WorrySighWorrySigh · 28/03/2013 20:04

Thank you for reading nellyjelly, I hope that you were able to find some peace in the end.

I'm guessing that what I am struggling with is an induction crisis. Also it doesnt help that my boss and boss's boss are new as well.

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MrsMargoLeadbetter · 29/03/2013 19:17

WorrySighWorrySigh sorry to hear you are having such a bad start. I do think orgs that put time into proper inductions reap the rewards with happier employees. They sound very disorganised & unsure of what they want - it may be that you'll never be able to satisfy them if they don't know what they want.

I think the main question is if you quit what are the negatives? It is "just" a case of the money, or will you feel like you didn't stick at it? To me it sounds like you could probably 'fudge' the gap on your CV, so I wouldn't focus on that being an issue.

I had a difficult 6 months in a job, but I am glad I stuck it out as when I left I knew I'd tried my best and basically it was them not me! However, I too had periods of crying and telling DH through tears that I was concerned about getting a terrible illness (eg cancer) due to the stress. I left towards the end of my 6 month probation. I am still in touch with some from there and they are still bumbling along not knowing what they want Hmm.

If you have been a contractor before, could you adopt a bit more (am making lots of asumptions here) of a 'freelance' mindset. Throw it back to them; "Ok thanks for that feedback, can you tell me what I should priortise/do on x next time?" and then finish any type of performance meeting with a run through of the points agreed, maybe follow up on email.

When a new task is presented to you, appear at their desk with a notepad and go through the task? Or ask them discretely via email/in a room (maybe they aren't giving enough detail as they don't know the detail themselves?). Try not to be apologetic about this. They cannot expect you to magically know how to do x if they don't give clear instructions....

Try to think less like an employee but more like a service provider?

I started freelancing when I left the "horrible job" as it is known to my friends and family (!) and I sometimes do contracts and I find myself with a much more "You need to tell me what you want to focus on, I cannot do the 20 things you want done today" or "I am sorry, but I don't understand this email about x, what exactly should I do with it?" and not caring what they think of that!

If they aren't managing you well, you could try to manage them upwards? Also are there proactive things you can do for yourself (book induction meetings with others if it hasn't been done for you) to help? Worth trying to sure up what the job spec is meant to be and giving it to your line manager in draft "to help us both understand my role"?

However, I also think if it really isn't working and realistically you don't think it will in the long term and it is making you miserable then leaving can be an option.

Hope you manage to have a break from it all over Easter.

Good luck.

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WorrySighWorrySigh · 29/03/2013 21:30

MrsMargoLeadbetter thank you very much indeed for a huge amount of very insightful advice.

I think your suggestion to think less like an employee and more like a freelance is excellent. I dont think my boss is a bully just a very poor man manager. On the one hand my boss wants to micro manage and then on the other delegates tasks faster than a playground slide.

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Stevie77 · 02/04/2013 12:00

Sounds familiar! See my thread titles Awkward Boss.

Whilst I'm not at the feeling miserable stage, I have taken this role with an exist strategy in mind (only I had higher expectations/hopes for it being longer term than I foresee it being). Perhaps adopt a similar thinking? Think of it as being temporary and giving you the opportunity to move on and upwards.

Having said that, no job is worth being so miserable about. I guess what you decide to do will depend on your personal circumstances...

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