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What do you do about Holidays?

(8 Posts)
Tink06 Thu 14-Jan-16 22:55:47

Hi. I have asked for advise before and you have all been very helpful. Mil has been living with us about 6 months after a broken hip. It is a permanent thing now.
She was very frail anyway and can only get around with a zimmer. Although she is having physio she is so weak and frail she can't really stand unaided and I can't see anything improving. She doesn't have carers - we do it as its meals and cups of tea, sorting tablets and other general stuff I am mostly doing anyway. It is manageable. She washes and dresses herself but can't really be left alone for long as she has had a few falls.
We usually book our summer hols about now. Dh has said he can't possibly go but my opinion is that is so unfair on the kids. We can't ever not go away as a family again.
Dsd will be home from uni so she wont be on her own but he can't provide any care.
What do other people do? How do you go about arranging temporary carers? I don't even know where to start. It would be to give her tablets (from a nomad), cook meals, do laundry, make sure bed is clean (occasional incontinence) and to empty her comode in the morning (she just user it at night).
Where do I go for advise? Could anyone help?

ChoudeBruxelles Thu 14-Jan-16 22:59:46

Assuming she isn't eligible for council funded social care have a look at local care agencies to see if they can cover your holiday

bunique Thu 14-Jan-16 23:04:18

A local care agency could provide support, but I would be asking your DSD to check that all tasks/ calls are being carried out

BackforGood Thu 14-Jan-16 23:48:02

Book some respite care. Plenty of homes for the elderly offer it around here - it will be her own holiday - like being in a hotel smile

Tink06 Fri 15-Jan-16 07:23:12

I will look at both thanks. Where do I start? Just by googling agencies/respite care or would the council's social care department point me in the right direction? I think home care might be better option as she wasn't keen on the respite she had after her op (and it was a lovely place).
Dsd can keep an eye on things.

BackforGood Fri 15-Jan-16 10:17:18

You could ask your council, but local options such as charities are often a good alternative (council may signpost you to these anyway).
I know my family got a lot of support from a charity called 'Crossroads' but try people like the 'Age UK' Charity, or charities for particular conditions (Stroke Association, Parkinsons, Dementia UK, etc)

Needmoresleep Fri 15-Jan-16 12:11:46

Social services can give you a list of local care homes, and their specialisms. Others, like the GP, the vicar or HV will know many of them. Most will not be able to recommend, but probably could confirm whether a home was suitable or not. For example you might want to avoid a home with a number of dementia patients if your MiLs needs are mainly nursing.

If your MiL might need to move to a care home in the future this would be a good way of trying one out. My mother spend a few weeks in a private nursing home when she was discharged from hospital. It was super expensive (£1,100 a week) but fantastic for us as it bought us time to make other arrangements whilst knowing she was in good hands. Someone described it as a cruiseship that never went into port. Lots of smiley staff, good home cooked food, and a daily list of activities. It means that I now have a better understanding of what to look for at the point when I need to more my mother.

bunique Sat 16-Jan-16 10:03:31

The local authority may be able to provide you with a list of providers but won't be able to recommend a specific one.

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