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Elderly parents

Any way we could combine care for my elderly disabled mother and school aged kids?

3 replies

doublechoc · 21/05/2013 14:29

Hi, just wondering if anybody has come up with a solution for this. My mum has early dementia and also mobility problems. We built a wheelchair friendly extension to our house and she is very comfy and healthy here.

However both me and my partner work FT, and I work odd shifts. So we have carers coming in the morning to help her shower and dress, and at lunchtime for her lunch. We also have an au pair for our kids (10 and 12 years old). Things worked ok in our previous house in terms of care, but since we moved we have had new carers and new au pair in the last 3 months and we are not that happy with either :-(

The carers were meant to be the same person doing the 2 week day calls, and another at the weekend. Previously was a lovely lady who knew my mum and came at the same time each day - very important for elderly and Alzheimer's people to have plans stuck to and continuity. Currently there has just been a whole variety of carers who come at variable times. This is distressing for my mum. Have spoken to the care provider loads about this, who apologise and say its getting sorted.....but it hasn't really changed.

Our new au pair has an eating disorder and hasn't really bonded with the kids (whole other subject!) so when she has finished her language course she'll probably go back to her country.

So.....could it be possible to find a caring competent person who could shower my mum and give her her mornings meds/lunch AND be there in the afternoons for our children (homework help and dinner)? I've a feeling I might be asking too much, but I really think mum would be better with a dedicated carer, but we couldn't have 2 extra people living in the house!

Thanks for reading such a long post!

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purplewithred · 21/05/2013 14:34

Au Pair Plus who just does your mum and higher level stuff for the kids + a cleaner?

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doublechoc · 21/05/2013 14:35

Ahh, didn't think an au pair plus would shower an elderly person, but that's definitely worth a shot. Thanks!

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CMOTDibbler · 22/05/2013 13:17

Its worth advertising for someone and see what you get - I can see that its a role that could appeal to someone while your mum just needs a bit of help and your children need someone around but not actual looking after.

I'd approach the role as a carer primarily who would also do child supervision and dinner for all, rather than primarily a child care post iyswim

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