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Elderly parents

Lonely and needs people around.

5 replies

Chippychop · 01/02/2013 10:35

My dm is too wobbly to go out by herself. Won't go to any pensioners clubs - says she hasn't got the confidence. But she need to Interact with the world, her whole demeaned changes depending on if she's socialised or not. My Sister and brother work ft. I live away. I do think sister could do more on an evening she doesn't have kids and is widowed but that's another story...

Any suggestion s for making mums life more worthwhile would be gratefully received

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twentyten · 01/02/2013 17:32

You can pay carers to take your mum out-my mum's carer takes a few ladies out once a month to a garden centre etc.
Age UK will pick up and take people to places-they have local coordinators.Social services can offer advice too.Crossroads offer sitting service as well.

Good luck!

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gingeroots · 11/02/2013 10:20

Taxi card scheme www.tfl.gov.uk/gettingaround/1195.aspx is good ,but I think only applies in London ?

Drivers very helpful and kind - once refused to take my mum until she put a warm coat on ,always check you have your keys etc .

And if she has any limited vision the RNIB run telephone groups for people to get together and chat . I know you could talk on phone to her but IME elderly ( like all of us ) appreciate chance to talk to peers .
www.rnib.org.uk/livingwithsightloss/copingwithsightloss/talksupport/Pages/talk_support.aspx

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adele1956 · 17/02/2013 12:56

Agree with the above points. Mum is 86 and 'gets inside her own head' if she hasn't seen anyone other than the carers who come in twice a day and us. Although she has been a churchgoer all her life, because she can know no longer get to the methodist church she used to attend, she has found it very difficult to socialise at the local methodist church even though they have been very welcoming to her.

You might have a Dial a Ride scheme your area which can help elderly people get out and about, our local service also runs trips. Age UK may know of groups, some local groups seem to offer a befriender service whereby volunteers visit people in their own homes. A charity has recently started sunday afternoon tea parties for elderly people on their own - mum was interested but Contact the Elderly are just in the process of recruiting volunteers who will host the tea party for up to 8 people, I understand they also recruit volunteer drivers to take the guests to the tea party.

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CocktailQueen · 09/03/2013 12:44

Adler - could someone t her church take her to church every week? Most churches will do this for their parishioners.

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JustinBsMum · 03/04/2013 21:16

I had this with my mum but it boiled down to the fact that she really wanted family to call in more. Then she didn't 'have' to make conversation and she could just be herself (getting hard of hearing etc). She stopped going to church but for some reason just didn't want to, despite being lonely.

Hope your mum will make the effort to socialise. Best of luck.

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