Is it my fault.

(12 Posts)
ICanSeeTheSun Wed 23-Jul-14 22:33:45

I don't normally post on here but I just need to get this out of my head.

DS has SEN has got a statement and now DD has left reception and hasn't even bought home a reading book.

I feel like this is my fault as I can not get them to do homework, ds homework IMO is way to difficult as it's the same homework for the whole age group. DD doesn't want to do it with me as she is tired after school.

LIZS Thu 24-Jul-14 06:28:47

If ds has SEN the homework should be differentiated either in quantity and/or difficulty, to reinforce what he has learnt so far. Could you spare a few minutes to help dd before school by changing your routine or weekends? As they progress you will need to do so and there is a lot of evidence that those supported at home do better in school, although homework is only one element of this.

TeenAndTween Thu 24-Jul-14 10:28:02

We have always read before school with DD2 (just finished y4) was she was way too tired afterwards.

We are currently trying to get her reading independently. I have bought a kitchen timer which is helping as she sees there is a limit to what I am asking her to do.

In the holidays we also have a rule of no screen time before reading has been done. That encourages it!

happygardening Thu 24-Jul-14 11:46:55

My DS2 didn't even go to nursery or for that matter school before yr 1, before he went to boarding prep I binned all homework, I'm proud to say I've never owned a flash card in my life. Before he went to school I worked very part time and we talked about everything, laughed, listened to audiobooks, walked, read stories, made up stories, visited art galleries played hundreds of different games in our local woods fields, and he rode ponies. At 11 he was offered places at two of the most selective independent schools one unbelievably over subscribed in the UK and is considered by his super selective to be "very able" and he's high achieving. I don't think it makes a scrap of difference if you do homework in reception. Enjoy your DD time goes so fast.

ICanSeeTheSun Thu 24-Jul-14 13:55:02

We do a lot of other things, but she just will not do the homework. Which isn't a lot just 10 words to read.

With DS I think it's cruel to make him do homework that he can not understand.

AuntieStella Thu 24-Jul-14 14:01:30

I didn't know any schools sent books home over the summer holidays, simply because too many get lost.

For the summer, I'd just make sure you read lots of books to DD and get her interest in stories going again.

If she has been asked to read lists of words as homework, does that mean they are following a proper phonics programme and she has been focussing on particular sounds? Did the school provide any information about their phonics programme?

LIZS Thu 24-Jul-14 14:02:50

With DS I think it's cruel to make him do homework that he can not understand Have you spoken to the school about this ? They should give him something he can follow and will reinforce his learning even if that is different to the rest of the class. SENCO should make this happen. If they can't/won't then maybe another school would be better for him.

Can you make dd's words into a game , cut them out, place face down and take it on turns to turn over and make a silly sentence with it. If she struggles with one add it to the next set.

ICanSeeTheSun Thu 24-Jul-14 20:47:38

Liz I have spoken to the school and it's going into his IEP.

Dd has never has a book from school.

Glastogirl Fri 25-Jul-14 09:23:31

I am so shocked that the school hasn't send home a single book all year and I would certainly but a complaint in if I were you! How is she with phonics? does she know all her sounds etc? Can she recognise them, blend them etc?

I am a Reception teacher and this isn't on at all. How did they grade her for the ELG for reading (Emerging, expected or exceeding?)

ICanSeeTheSun Fri 25-Jul-14 09:37:33

She is ok with blending her phonics at a basic level, words like cot cat and more recently kick ect.

I am just so scared of DD having SEN as managing 1 child with SEN with ASD is mentally draining.

whyayepetal Tue 29-Jul-14 09:03:35

Hi OP - I have to say I agree with Glastogirl and would be asking questions at school next term. In the meantime, have you considered joining in with the reading challenge being run by local libraries over the summer holidays - called "Mythical Maze" this year I think. DC read (or share) 6 books and collect stickers for their efforts, with a medal for completing all 6. Certificates for DC who complete the challenge are sent to schools, and are often presented in assembly, so they start the academic year with success. Beauty of it is that you can tailor it to suit your DC, regarding their individual interests and capabilities. Hope this helps.

MumTryingHerBest Tue 29-Jul-14 10:49:05

ICanSeeTheSun - Dd has never has a book from school. Is your daughter the only one in the class not bringing a book home to read? If she is then I would be asking the school to explain the reason for this.

I agree with whyayepetal the reading challenge is a great scheme and my DCs have taken part for the last couple of years. They get some great novelty stickers etc. which is a nice reward for their efforts. They also allow children to include books that someone has read to them and this enables younger / less able readers to take part but still enjoy the experience of books.

As this is obviously very stressful for you, do discuss it with the school as many times as it takes to either get them to act or at least put your mind at rest that you daughter is being educated appropriately.

In the mean time consider ways that you can help your daughter. My DS quite often forgets to bring his reading book home from school so I make him choose one of his own books from home. I have a nice collection of books for him to choose from which I have picked up from charity shops for a few pence. They are also books which I know are appropriate for his reading ability (as he does have a tendency to choose books from school that have the least amount of pages or look the easiest to read).

I noticed quite early on that my DD was not really getting into independent reading and was showing very little interest. I figured that perhaps the way phonics was being taught to her at that stage was simply not engaging her. As a result I subscribed to Reading Eggs. After two weeks she had gone up two levels. Admittedly by this point the novelty of Reading Eggs was wearing off so I moved back to her just reading aloud to me. As she had become much better and more confident at reading, it was a lot less of a struggle to get her to do it. One year on from that point she is above average in reading for her age.

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