Decision to make whether to move dd's school

(10 Posts)
Dancergirl Fri 09-May-14 09:26:07

My younger two dds are in Years 6 and 2 at the same primary school. For various reasons I have been unhappy with the school recently and have been looking to move youngest dd. In my mind I thought the start of Year 3 would be a good time to move.

However a place has come up at a school we really like and I'm wondering whether to move her now. She's had a few friendship issues so wouldn't be unhappy to leave I don't think. The new school say it would be nice for her to start now - they have some lovely fun stuff going on this term, outings etc, she could start making friends and organising some play dates for the summer.

Dd actually said a while ago she really wanted to leave the school. But now it comes to it, she's having a few wobbles and seems less sure. But she's only just 7 and this is a decision we have to make for her as parents. I think she feels really nervous about a new school (understandably) and tbh I feel a bit nervous too.

How do you know if you're making the right decision and they'll be happy? My other two dds went straight through at the same primary so I've never done this before.

doodledotmum Fri 09-May-14 09:45:33

I don't think there us a full proof way. So much depends on what the issues are and how much you are sure that school B is better in that respect?

Floggingmolly Fri 09-May-14 09:48:51

It's a leap of faith really, you can't know for sure. But fgs don't leave the decision to your dd, she's far to young to bear the responsibility.

3littlefrogs Fri 09-May-14 09:49:36

Go with your gut feeling.
I moved all of mine from their first primary schools.
I haven't regretted it.

Make a list, on paper, of the pros and cons of leaving/staying.
I find this a good way of making a decision.

I wish my parents had moved me from my horrible school when they had the chance. I was miserable there for years and it has definitely affected the rest of my life.

Has your dd visited the new school?

Dancergirl Fri 09-May-14 09:54:57

Yes she has seen the new school and maybe I didn't explain very clearly, I'm certainly not letting a 7 year old make the decision! I suppose it's just her wobbles are making me unsure.

I think the only downside is that the new school is a bit further away and starts earlier so it means an earlier start for us. Dd is a night owl and I struggle to get her up at 7.45am. She will have to be up earlier but I suppose we'll all get used to that.

FurryGiraffe Fri 09-May-14 10:05:32

I moved primary schools in the summer term of year 5 (parents/my choice due to being unhappy at school number one) and it worked really well for me. I had time to settle in and make friends (and go on the year 5 residential trip) so by the time year 6 started I wasn't the new girl and could get on with things like everyone else. With hindsight, I imagine it was good for the school too, as it meant they had the summer of year 5 to work out my abilities etc and they didn't spend the first part of year 6 working out what groups to put me in etc.

I think you have to trust your judgement: if you have good reasons for moving her then it's the right thing to do. She's going to be wobbly- it's a tough thing for her to do (I was wobbly and I was older and very much in favour of moving but it was still hard) but if moving her is the right thing then go with it.

Dancergirl Fri 09-May-14 10:08:33

Thank you.

My instincts say yes!

What's the protocol for telling the old school? Letter, phone call, email?

SpecialMeasures2014 Fri 09-May-14 12:46:24

Dancergirl - we are having a similar dilemma. But my children's school is in Special Measures, my eldest is settled with good friends but is most likely to be affected as will be going to KS2 next year where the main issues are.

Never thought I'd be contemplating this. Aargh!

If I were you I'd start her before the summer so she's not fretting for 6 weeks.

cutsnake Sat 10-May-14 00:55:51

Hi, last year my 8 yo DD was unhappy at school and we were thinking about moving her.

A place came up very suddenly at the school we wanted (in the middle of term) - we had 2 days to decide and pay enrolment fee before they offered the place to the next kid on the waiting list.

We had reservations about switching in the middle of term with no orientation programme, but went with our gut and took the spot - otherwise she might have missed out as the school is very sought-after.

It took her about a term to really settle and there were some tears in the first week - she tended to look back at the old school with rose coloured glasses. A year later she is a different kid, has absolutely blossomed, regained her lost confidence, and we are so glad we moved her to an environment where she could thrive.

So I say - do it!

Dancergirl Sat 10-May-14 09:39:26

Thank you, I think we have decided to go for it!

The only question now is when? The new school is big (3 form entry) and they are in the middle of SATS. They told me the SATS are going on for 3 weeks, last week, the coming week and the week after. It sounded like they were making a really big deal over them but after talking to current parents, they're taking that long because of the number of children and they are doing the tests in small groups. It's very relaxed and low key.

Personally I think she should start very soon but dh thinks it's unfair on her to do the SATS there if she hasn't been taught there. I don't think it matters, it's the same work and she's an able child (level 2a for everything at the moment).

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