Parents Evening?

[PeachyClair]

DS2 is in reception year. he missed two days of school last week, as we took our elder son to BIBIC as a family for help with his SN. The school knew this, but unfortunately the message didn't get back to the teacher.

Anyway it seems that parents evening was arranged whilst we were away. DS2's teacher tracked us down to let us book a space (we weren't aware we had missed it), but ds1's teacher has not booked us a slot. As it is tomorrow, it is now 'too late'. Are we entitled to a metting with her?

We are very unhappy with her as a Teacher: she constantly ignores DS2's talking to her (he is unclear due to Glue Ear), and just talks over the top of him. She also makes it very clear who her faves are, and he isn't one. But it's subtle things- like when we took projects in last week, it was 'Oh XXXX, that's lovely, you are so clever!. Stirling put yours in the corner.'

I don't know how to raise it without seeming paranoid. I'd have possibly left it, only I was telling DS2 what a lovely good boy he is the other night (he really is- a genuine sweetheart) and he said 'No i'm not. All the other boys and girls get certificates from Mrs X in assembly and I never do so I must be a bad boy'.

My heart broke for the poor lad!

[PeachyClair]

Sorry- ds1's teacher booked us, ds2's didn't: I get confused!

[Avalon]

Yes, I think you're entitled to have a meeting with her (the old bag!)

Why not contact the head and get him/her to sort out a meeting time at your convenience?

[Littlefish]

I always make the effort to see parents even if they can't make the actual appointments. I think it's really important, particularly for the first meeting in Reception. Where possible, I try and add an extra one on the beginning or end of the session, but if it's not possible, I will arrange to see parents at another time during the week.

Where parents make alternative appointments, I try and make it at a reasonable time for all of us, but that usually means it has to be before 5.30pm which I know is difficult for working parents. I've also done appointments at 8.15am.

Have you asked DS2s teacher whether you can see her at another time? Did the "too late" comment come from her?

[PeachyClair]

My dh works nights and I am a student, so actually teacher suitable times work much better for us too.

The too late wasn't a comment, more an attitude: we didn't get the letter reminding people of their booked appointments made on Monday until friday evening, and the appointments are on Monday, leaving us no time to book up.

I have approached her on several occasions regarding helping etc, but she consistently blanks me. They were appealing for classroom help and I want to teach (albeit at secondary level) but I think there are issues regarding A: the fact we are on a low income (eg, they asked for trip help last week, which I have always done with ds1, but wanted me to pay to go on top whci I simply cannot. Also, they wanted £36 in 'voluntary contributions' last week alone, whcih I am struggling to find, and optional activities such as charity donations are simply impossible until I graduate. I did make the effort to do much of my Christmas shopping from their Yeloow Moon book though, so they saw the benefit). B: they are a heavily Christian school, even teaching Creationism (unfortunately only school available) and I am 'known' to be studying World Religion, and another teacher mentioned they were concerned I might teach- shock, horror- 'Hinduism or something' if I was helping out. Why would I risk the school's funding by doing that? What makes them think I couldn't do as I am told and stick to alesson plan? However, I am teaching Darwinism, Diwali, respect for all religion at home.

Sam wanted to take a Diwali card he made into school for show and tell, but I didn't dare let him.


We are Humanist, but (I am SO ashamed to say this) I am too screed to tell the School.

Oops too many issues coming out!!

[Cam]

Peachyclair, have you asked her to her face for an appointment?
If so and she said "too late", go to the Head.
Re the glue ear, is she aware that your ds has a hearing problem?

[PeachyClair]

they know about hearing problem, it's very evident, plus they gave him a place in their nursery class for six weeks after we moved here because of it.

She didn't sday it to my face- we only found out at all from a note sent to all parents Friday evening.

[philippat]

I think you should tell her (yes, of course she should be able to make an appointment with you at some other time) exactly what your ds2 said to you and ask her 'how can we help ds2 to succeed in getting a certificate?'

But my, the creationism! That must be tough.

[Cam]

Peachy, is this a state school?

[PeachyClair]

Yes, but it is an endowed school (Church of Wales)

[SueW]

I'm confused - why would they be worried you'd be teaching Hinduism if you're helping out? Most parent helpers I know spend time cutting, listening to reading, etc. Definitely not teaching. Or are you a teacher and have volunteered to help out in that capacity?

Agree with philippat on strategies for appointment.

Your religion - is there any reason school should know?

[PeachyClair]

The school worships three times a day, which is why they're interested in our religions: they are also mostly funded by the Church and an endowment from some chaps will that is based on them teaching Christianity.

I AM studying to be an RE teacher, but all I offered was the cutting out / arty stuff like anyone else. I did ask at a parents evening how much multicultural stuff they do, as I think it's important, that's what triggered it.

Rebel, me (not)

[bigdonna]

peachyclair our parents evening are only to talk about how they are getting on we have to take kids with us we are told if we have any other matters we must make a separate appointment it only lasts 5-7 mins .i know how you feel about favs my dd last year was always getting stars and certificates but her teacher this year seems to just give the naughty children stars my dd is so well behaved in class,but like your son had problems with ears has had speach therapy but still talks very fast.

[titchy]

I am surprised, nay shocked, that they teach Creationism. Is it a state school? Do they get Ofsted? Or any other sort of inspection? IMO this would not be approved at all. The National Curriculum requires schools to teach about all religions (parents can opt out I believe, but not schools), and History should be taught accurately which obviously it isn't if they teach Creationism.

As far as classroom help goes do you have a system of class reps to organise a rota of parent helpers? Or is there a PTA you could join. Perhaps once you're involved with the school in other ways and your face fits so to speak the teachers will be more willing to accept your help.

[PeachyClair]

I wanted to join the PTA, but DH works night shifts and all their meetings are at night (for us, night is after 7.30 pm). I did explain this, but until he can find another jon it's difficult.