Help please, mediation. Advice appreciated.

(5 Posts)
Homely1 Tue 15-Mar-16 19:28:51

I have my first joint mediation session looming so that things can be discussed over child contact. How do j make it successful so that ex doesn't take me to court? I am dreading being in a room with him and listening to him. He's manipulative.

Duffelcoat Tue 15-Mar-16 21:11:16

Im in the same situation. Got my first full mediation appointment tomorrow. Nervous as hell

Homely1 Tue 15-Mar-16 22:16:40

Hugs xxx

jellybean2000 Wed 16-Mar-16 08:26:26

In what way is he manipulative.
If you do not feel joint mediation will be of benefit you do not have to go.

Both parties need to show they have gone to an initial meeting individually, but there are many situations in which joint mediation isn't recommended.

After my stbx went to his initial meeting they wrote and told me they didn't think joint mediation would work for us. Wasn't going to go with him anyway (EA), so this just validated it.

My advice would be to write down what YOUR goals of the meeting are. Focus just on the children and their needs. The mediator should guide things back to the issue in question.

In your situation I would tell myself that saying nothing is better than trying to get embroiled in heady discussions, especially if he's being manipulative.

Also, it might sound a bit woo woo, but try a mantra you can just repeat in your head - something like "it's about the kids, it's about the kids".

Good luck and to you too duffel

Homely1 Wed 16-Mar-16 18:32:56

Thank you so much- great advice.

How did it go Duffel?

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