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Divorce/separation

what to do when can't reach a financial agreement

7 replies

83mummypig · 08/02/2016 08:23

My brother split from his wife last year. The divorce process is going through and they are trying to sort finances however it's not going well. She has brought her new boyf (who has moved in) on the negotiations and they are ganging up on him. The ex has refused to meet in person so the negotiations are going on via email.

She was the main breadwinner and kicked my brother out. He has nothing to show and the amount he is being offered is nothing in comparison to what's in the pot. She is playing the 'mum' card and she needs everything - despite the fact they have 50/50. She has kept all their belongings - including some valuable ones that he saved for himself.

His solicitor has offered some free advice on the phone a couple of times but is there anyway he can proceed and get this sorted which doesn't involve £££££?

OP posts:
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Quoteunquote · 08/02/2016 17:37

He really needs a good solicitor.

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tbtc20 · 08/02/2016 22:41

On what grounds did she kick him out? Why did he leave?
I am mid-divorce and the starting point is 50/50. As much as I would like him to leave, I can't make him, so he isn't going. Likewise, he can't make me leave.

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etttvatre · 08/02/2016 22:44

Was he a SAHD? Surely then the courts should rule in his favour with regards to the children and he is the one that needs the house? Strange if she's then playing the mum card.

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Dungandbother · 08/02/2016 22:47

You mean 50/50 on childcare? That being so then maintenance is not so much an issue. But depending on ages of children and length of marriage then he could consider spousal maintenance.
Probably not worth the effort. He is entitled to 50% of the marital home and if that means sale then so be it.

he needs a lawyer because he ain't gonna win against her with nice words.

He can enter the house and take his possessions and she is in the wrong to prevent him access. He can do that nicely with notice or lawyer up to the hilt and get a court order.

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Dungandbother · 08/02/2016 22:53

Just to add.

He needs a lawyer. He needs to do a form E. Full disclosure of all assets.

If her boyfriend is living there (I suggest proof is gathered, trip her into admitting it in emails frankly)

Then once he has proof, that she cannot deny, because she has set up home with a new person, that persons financial situation comes into the mix of the divorce. But he needs proof.

Whether he actually proceeds with this proof is another thing but I have found it to be a very useful bargaining tool.

Is she self employed?
How old are the children?
When did he reduce his hits for childcare purposes and for how long?

If she's withholding assets allowing him access to fund a lawyer, he can pay the lawyer out the pot after the event.

I will be frank. How much money is at stake?
How much does she earn, how much is the house worth?

Unless she is stinking rich, it's not worth it. And if she is stinking rich, she will out- lawyer him.

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Dungandbother · 08/02/2016 22:54

*hits = hours

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DeoGratias · 09/02/2016 20:44

First of all we need to know what the joint net assets are less liabilities so know if they are arguing over very little or is there £500k equity in the house and she wants to keep it all?

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