Update and has anyone used an online divorce package?(4 Posts)
Apologies for the long post...
I haven't posted for a while but I'm planning to start divorce proceedings this week and I wanted to know if anyone had any experience of using the cheap online divorce packages.
Just to update you on my situation; I have been married for 17 years and I have 2 children (age 16 and 17) The marriage wasn't good for a long time, he cheated, we tried relate but eventually it got to the point where we were pretty much living separate lives. He moved into the spare room last February but by Easter he wanted to 'try again' which meant him remaining in the spare room and doing as he pleased. Not surprisingly I'd had enough of this by August last year and constant arguments followed. He then announced he was moving out and things have been difficult since then due to him telling everyone that it's 'all my fault' for not being happy with him seeing his female friends etc. He has also told people that I have mental health issues to suggest that he left for another woman (which I knew he had but just couldn't prove at that point) I tried to meet with him a few times to discuss divorce but he has been completely unreasonable and threatened to fight me in court telling me 'he was happy to use all of the equity in the house to pay for a divorce. This had an impact on my health so I have tried my best to avoid him for the past few months. He doesn't have a good relationship with the girls and places more emphasis on having access to the dog.
Anyway... things changed dramatically on Friday evening when the idiot accidentally sent messages to his 'girlfriend' to our 17 year old daughter - oops! Of course he was panicking and he phoned her and begged her not to tell me etc. Obviously she did and it was the woman I suspected all along!
He has now had a dramatic change of heart and is happy for me to divorce him for unreasonable behaviour which he won't contest plus he only wants a small share of the equity in the house. I'm assuming that this is to protect the new woman because she is from a community that would shun her if this became public knowledge, either way it works out brilliantly for me!
So I want to divorce him as quickly and as cheaply as possible so the Internet packages seem quite appealing. I also don't trust him at all and would need his agreement to only take a small amount of equity to be legally binding.
Does anyone have any experience of these sites and any recommendations?
I made the mistake of going for a 'low-cost' online/over the phone option and it's cost me a lot more than it would have done to just go for a local solicitor in the first place, not because it's been a complicated process but because they bill me extra for all sorts of things that would normally be dealt with (as I've since discovered).
You could always start by going for one of the £39 options where they basically send you the forms and a 'how to' guide and seeing how you go. I would always suggest using a local solicitor to draw up the financial consent order though.
You can do it yourself, search for divorce and the gov.uk site should show up.
Make sure you know what you are paying and what you are getting.
I know divorcebox offer a free sample of their guide if you want to do it yourself.
Or you can get them to fill in the forms which is low cost and less hassle.
The gov website is very good www.gov.uk/divorce/overview place to start, to help get your bearings.
Divorce and finances are dealt with separately, but run alongside each other, as you have children stay away from consent orders, they finalize ALL claims in respect of financial affairs and you have children so you will need to allow for changes depending on there needs.
Mediation is a very good place to start sorting out the finances, its not about getting back together, its an impartial third party that assist's with resolution on practical matters. Legal Aid is available for mediation if you meet the criteria.
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