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Divorce/separation

What to do with wedding photos, wedding rings etc

12 replies

Gobzilla · 10/01/2016 13:02

The ex moved out last week and as I embark on the clean up I wonder what people do with their wedding photos, wedding rings, etc. I'm alarmed 7 year old DS has a negative attitude towards relationships and was wondering if he might like to see photos of his parents when they dated so one day he understands that his parents - and by implication adults - dont always hate each other.

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specialsubject · 10/01/2016 13:10

no personal experience, but with a long history of divorces on the family tree I still like to see the wedding photos. If you were happy once ( and I sincerely hope so!) that is also a good message to send. So I'd suggest boxing up a selection (protected against damp etc) so the option is there.

not sure about the rings, tuck away somewhere for now?

wishing you all the best.

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caledonianclown · 10/01/2016 13:13

I've still got my wedding photos in a box in the loft. I'll get them out one day to show DS if he's interested. They mark a point in time when me and his dad were happy and in love and I think it's important that he knows thats where he came from. The unhappy bit came later!
Sold my wedding ring and engagement ring though, felt silly to have them sitting in a box in the cupboard and I'm not sure I'd ever want to pass them on to DS or anyone else. Used the money for a holiday with DP Wink

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WhereTheFuckIsWonderWoman · 10/01/2016 13:17

I'm keeping both rings and photos for DD when she's older. StI'll no idea what to do about the dress and it's almost five years since we split.

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Gobzilla · 10/01/2016 13:18

Thank you special and caledonia. It breaks my heart that DS thinks all adults hate each other and he's going to ditch his girlfriend if she has any faults but I'm hoping it's a 7 year old boy perspective rather than an impenetrable scar.

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Gobzilla · 10/01/2016 13:22

WTFWonderwoman I love the user name. Sounds like a good plan. I like not being a dogmatic revisionist. It's crazy to whitewash the fact we were once in love with our ex-es.

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WhereTheFuckIsWonderWoman · 10/01/2016 14:11

I agree. She's five and asks about it, trying to understand that we were once married and now aren't. She says we (me and her dad) should have spent more time together Sad

I sometimes worry about what she thinks of the whole thing. She knows one of my dislikes about disney princesses is that they get married at the drop of a hat and I believe in knowing and truly loving someone before getting married. I don't always practice what I preach Blush

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Minime85 · 10/01/2016 18:14

I have kept wedding album for reason you say and it's part of kids history. I have got rid of any other photos though and all wedding stuff. I kept rings too as was only going to get a very small amount from pawn brokers which seemed wrong that's only reason I have them. You can show dc a good relationship though by a future one you may have with someone else. My Dcs certainly see that as their dad and I barely saw each other or they him. Good luck

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ChoclolateOrange · 10/01/2016 18:19

I have kept photos, but got rid of the rings, and the surname both of which gave me an enormous amount of pleasureGrin

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Fairylea · 10/01/2016 18:21

I tore up and binned the wedding photos and pawned the rings! Grin used the money towards a trip to Disney for me and dd!

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Happydappy99 · 10/01/2016 18:25

I tore up all the wedding photos, Valentine's cards etc the day I found out he'd been cheating on me for entire 8 years we were together. I still have digital copies that the kids like to look at sometimes.

My dress, both our rings and the jewellery he gave me are in a box in the loft. I'd quite like to get rid of the dress but can't quite bring myself to:(

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TooSassy · 10/01/2016 19:39

Dress to charity

Photo albums kept for DC's. We were in love and we had a great marriage for a good few years. They were born out of a relationship of love. The photos are testament to that

Any personal cards/ trinkets from him I had kept were all binned

Rings currently in safe. It's between selling them/ melting down and making them into a new item of jewellery. Am undecided.

Surname will be gone once decree absolute comes through.

What else??? Think that's the main bits and pieces.

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LongHardStare · 10/01/2016 19:44

Not just for your DS' sake - you don't know which of these you would like to have as mementos in the future when it is not so raw.

I would stick everything in a box in the loft (if you have one) for now and not go back to it until you want to, which may be years from now.

That's what I did.

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