Financial Settlement Advice please!!

[Donatello68]

I am divorcing my EA ExH. The decree nisi came through at the beginning of July. ExH has been stalling mediation and finally agreed to go along in Nov. We both filled out a form based on the Form E. He made a ridiculously low offer which I declined. I have paid a solicitor for a fixed fee divorce and, up to now, she has been brilliant. I took the forms to her and she spent an hour giving me advice. Based on her advice, I have come up with a counter offer. I have asked her if it about right and she has said that she can only answer direct questions. My ExH is very abusive and will take any opportunity to rip me off. He doesn't have a solicitor and hasn't paid for any of the legal costs. I am nervous of giving my ExH the counter offer without it being checked by someone first. Even if I had a ball park figure, it would be great. On my solicitor's website, it states that they charge £1500 + vat for the financial settlement. I am not sure if it is worth paying the extra money. Would I need to pay this anyway to have the financial settlement out before a judge? I am just looking for a fair and quick settlement and don't want to go to court. Could anyone please advise me on how to move forwards in this? Any advice greatly appreciated.

[ALaughAMinute]

I would say it's well worth paying for the financial settlement. I paid my solicitor to negotiate on my behalf without the need for mediation or going to court. Obviously the outcome will depend on your individual circumstances but a good solicitor will make sure you get the best deal. Good luck.

[Donatello68]

Thank you very much. I will speak to my solicitor next week. It is a lot of money but, I am sure that it will be worth it for the peace of mind.

[inchoccyheaven]

It is a lot of money but it will be a whole lot more if it goes to court. So far I have spent £4k getting divorced but we haven't agreed on financial agreement in this time ( well we did but then he changed terms!!) so now I will find out on Monday if he has agreed to mediation otherwise I have no choice but to go to court which my solicitor says worse case scenario is up to £20k !! I am hoping like crazy he sees sense to go to mediation but we don't have contact and I can see him just ignoring it all like he has done for months.

[icandothis64]

I just posted on another thread. I have divorced friends. Some of which spent up to £50k on the whole process. Others spent only very little. All ended up with pretty much the same. As the lower earner or SAHMs, and at least one DC, they all ended yo with roughly 65% of total assets Inc pensions etc. Most took more cash to keep pensions intact, so on a cash basis may have ended up with more as a trade off but that has been the net effect. Every case will be different but amazing how similar these results were. Might be worth keeping in mind on reviewing any offer before settling or spending more on legal fees. Hope it helps. Good luck.