Lost & Sad...!

[Clarita12345]

Lost...:(
I wrote about this before... There is more to my sad story.
I am going through divorce and we have received the court divorce acceptance but he still lives at home in a separate room for last 2 years. He was making plans to leave back in Nov -Dec but gave up as his girlfriend (our ex employee) asked him to stop any contact with me once they move in together... He refused for the 3 kids we have together....So, they broke up as she didn't trust him being with us both at the same time.
Anyway, he is now asking me for Sex saying that the 3 times verbal Islamic divorce he did back in October is not Valid and that I should give him what he needs. This is his Right and I should obey:((
After refusing, he left the house at 10pm telling me he was going to a prostitute that would cost between £60-£100 and that I need to put up with the financial costs (we share a business)....
2 days later, he started again on the same issue by saying that since I have been stubborn to give him sex, he will make sure that he will make me pay the price for refusing, he will make sure that I will pay physically, emotionally, financially by whatever way, he will make my life hell and will also with one phone call cancel the divorce the court has accepted.
He also said that he could stop me from using my phone and that I would need his permission to talk to anyone on the phone.
I didn't sleep well last night and was so anxious & on my nerves.
I called my solicitor this morning who told me that it was too late for him to cancel the divorce unless he has money to spend on a long process.
Mage puts my mind at rest somehow but knowing him, he will try to turn nasty:(

[MrsTawdry]

Call the police. He's basically threatening violence. who owns the house?

[Clarita12345]

Thank you Maddy... We both are on the mortgage.
I am repairing the house at the moment so we have to share the bed with my toddler in the middle.
Last night while trying to get some sleep at 9:30, he texted me " you have nothing to say"... I tried to ignore him but he went on talking loudly... So I replied that I needed to get some rest as I wake up at 5:30 to get to work in my son's school who will be in the car for around 45mins-1hr journey...!
His reply was that he didn't care and that I needed to give him his right, then he went on asking me to leave the room and find somewhere else to sleep. When I replied that all other rooms in the house are messy, he replied that he doesn't care and that if I am being stubborn to give him sex he can be stubborn and treat me like shit.
I left the room and went to sleep with my daughter in bed. Didn't get much nor good sleep

[Clarita12345]

Sorry.. Meant Mrs Tawdry ...

[Babashka]

Is this a wind up?

[Homely1]

I'm so sorry to hear this. This is emotional abuse. It is so hard to live through this. May I ask what his cultural background? This sort of 'obey me' attitude can be endemic amongst some.

Please please please report this to the police and to your solicitor.

Hugs to you. X

[Clarita12345]

Thank you homely1,
He is Muslim chiit, he was so open when we met 18years ago, but he seems to be returning back to his roots:(( he is trying to abuse me emotionally and put pressure to do as he wishes.
I came up with mumsneters (help) to realise he is a sociopath as he ticks all the boxes.
I told my solicitor about it, she asked to call the police should he keep harassing me.

[Homely1]

I think that they all do. I've been in a short marriage and have been totally emotionally abused. Same story... Open to begin but now very very traditional. Throwing religion in my face when what is being said is nothing to do with religion. It's all cultural- the need for control, I was told I must obey. Sociopath as you say.

He wants DC on own and hasn't really been interested. But denies this. How so I get around this?

Please keep reporting what is happening. Get him out too if you can...

[Homely1]

I feel lost and sad too

[Allthatnonsense]

I hope that your husbands gets his genitals cut off or worse.