He's left...(long post)

[Loveandstuff]

Hi
I don't know where else to turn to be honest. I've always been more a 'browser' on MN rather than ask for any advice/support.
My Husband and I have been together for 5 years, married for 4. We have 2 small children. It has always been a dysfunctional relationship really, there has been violence in the past and police have been involved but this was 3 years ago.
IMO he is emotionally abusing me, makes me feel guilty for things, makes me cry then sits there emotionless, calls me names, won't let me have FB and thinks I look better without makeup (makes me feel guilty if I wear it). Anyway, he has accused me of abusing him...I have been jealous in the past. We have tried to move on from all this but the past just hangs over us like a dark cloud.
We decided we are going to sell the flat we live in as it's too small & I'm unhappy here...he didn't really want to but we decided we were going to try & get a shared ownership house nearby as I am not working. When I started to get things organised in the flat, declutter etc- he instigated an argument and left, moved back in with his parents and has ignored me since. He left on Sunday night. He is now refusing to talk to me, discuss things, says I should really think about what I want & he is unhappy.
I'm so confused. I want to move but can't now as it is his salary we would be using. I am financially dependant on him. I am anxious and not in a good place.
It's almost like he still has complete control over me & my childrens lives even though he's not here...

Sorry if this message is all over the place...My head is all over the place.

[OhNoNotMyBaby]

You don't have 2 children OP, you have 3.

The violence and abuse - and forbidding you to have FB or wear make-up is abuse too - is totally unacceptable.

I don't know what to advise here really, except that I would recommend you seek immediate legal advice and talk to a women's refuge centre, the Citizens Advice Bureau and anyone else you can think of.

If I were you, I would be glad that he has gone and I would change the locks on the doors and not let him back.