Have been having problems for well over a year and counselling for nearly a year.
We have discussed separating but he refuses to move out. He works long hours (leaves at 6.45 and back at 8-9pm). I have been a sahm for 15 yrs. 2 kids who I take to and collect from 2 diff schools.
I tell him that it is less disruptive to the kids if he moves out as he has nothing to do with them care-wise during the week yet I completely understand his valid point that it is me who is unhappy not him and that I had an affair.
I also see it unreasonable to make him leave when he is happy but I want to leave him not the kids...(moving with the kids is same thing ie why should he be separated from them)...
So I have had enough...altho I have massive swings...but perhaps I need a separation to value and appreciate what I have?
My question is, is it an age old mothers tale that one should stay put?
I would expect and accept he would want to share the childcare for the children 50/50 should we split. And the children will come first in terms of we would do our utmost to look after their needs.
I've been generally unhappy for some time. I don't feel any physical attraction anymore and haven't for around 1.5-2 yrs. the thought of it being just me and him as the kids grow up does nothing to excite me at all and I don't enjoy his company any more.
But he is a good man, a good provider, and a good father.