Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help with medical problems. If you have any serious concerns, we would urge you to consult your GP.

Resources for AS/NT partnerships

(74 Posts)
Derkyderpy Thu 26-Jul-12 17:41:08

A few of us have been discussing ways to share resources and info on AS/NT partnerships on MN. This thread is to see if we can draw together some of the resources people have found most helpful and beneficial.

If you have a useful and constructive link or recommendation to suggest, please do add it!

smile thanks smile

Derkyderpy Thu 26-Jul-12 17:44:06

A good starting point is the National Autistic Society's guide for partners of people with Asperger Syndrome here.

Derkyderpy Thu 26-Jul-12 17:46:23
Berris Thu 26-Jul-12 18:00:25

This blog post http://30daysofautism.wordpress.com/2011/12/08/aspient-relationships-an-adult-perspective-on-conflict-resolution-and-listening/

In fact, the whole blog gives good perspectives, I think smile

Berris Thu 26-Jul-12 18:01:19
Derkyderpy Thu 26-Jul-12 18:06:03

Thanks, Berris, that looks really interesting. smile

Derkyderpy Thu 26-Jul-12 18:11:19

I've signed up to the blog - there's tons of useful info on there, it'll take me a while to read through it.

oldgreyknickertest Thu 26-Jul-12 19:09:40

Just read the opening entry about listening and realise I follow that pattern. But I don't get asked, I have to explain. Even that is a step forward that makes things better.

Sorry, Derk has put on my only suggestion save for a historical novel about living with an obviously AS man, the Rider of the White Horse by Rosemary sutcliff, and two children's books, the curious incident of the dog in the nighttime, and the London eye mystery.

By using the two latter as bedtime book with Ds, DH was able to recognise that he is AS though with no dx. it was a relatively stress free approach to the subject. The London eye is for younger children, yrs 5 and 6 I suspect.

Derkyderpy Fri 27-Jul-12 13:20:53

This Autism Daddy blog was recommended on another thread.

smile

Derkyderpy Fri 27-Jul-12 14:13:14

Maybe not for everyone, but this Deepak Chopra site offering free meditations was recommended on a different thread.

Derkyderpy Sun 26-Aug-12 17:06:11

FAAAS is an online resource for families.

Derkyderpy Sun 26-Aug-12 17:40:06
Derkyderpy Sun 26-Aug-12 17:41:55

Hendrickx Associates - training, workshops etc.

Derkyderpy Sun 26-Aug-12 17:44:14
Derkyderpy Tue 04-Sep-12 18:40:14
Isabeller Fri 28-Sep-12 19:14:26

I found Delphi Forums AS and their Partners really helpful with a very positive approach. It is a mixed forum promoting NT/AS understanding and partners includes friends and family members.

Screaminabdabs Sun 30-Sep-12 22:46:05
HappyNoelSadNoel Mon 26-Nov-12 22:37:52

Thank you so much for this thread and the links, I've been looking for some resources to help us and hadn't really found anything.
I've just ordered
The Asperger Couple's Workbook: Practical Advice and Activities for Couples and Counsellors and 22 Things a Woman Must Know If She Loves a Man with Asperger's Syndrome

Monkeytrewsers Wed 28-Nov-12 00:18:17

Just newly diagnosed with AS at 42 - and my son who is 8.

Monkeytrewsers Wed 28-Nov-12 00:18:49

If anyone remembers me - it's Monkeytrousers

MoelFammau Fri 30-Nov-12 01:44:30

I'm kickstarting a (hopefully) long running series of workshops for those on the spectrum, titled "Exploring Body Language Through Animation".

I'm a character animator with 15 years of professional credits, and I've been encouraged to develop some sessions where I share my knowledge of body language and expression and give practical hands-on workshops to small groups. The format involves discussion, acting out emotions and then attempting to transpose these on to a Plasticine figure using top of the range animation software. The style of the workshops is relaxed, informal and creative and the goal is to provide useful insights into body language in a memorable way.

I'm beginning in Glasgow and would be very grateful if people could help me get the word out! Sessions begin in the New Year and are for all ages from 8+. Please PM me for more details.

Thank you!

paintedveil Sat 22-Dec-12 14:16:32

www.amazon.co.uk/Connecting-Your-Asperger-Partner-Negotiating/dp/1849051305/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1353809204&sr=8-5

Another useful book.

Moel, don't suppose you've got a link to your workshops, please?

paintedveil Sat 22-Dec-12 14:18:27
apaintedveil Sat 22-Dec-12 15:27:07
apaintedveil Sat 22-Dec-12 15:28:10
apaintedveil Sat 22-Dec-12 15:29:31
apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 17:42:37
apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 17:43:28

http://autismsocietyofnc.wordpress.com/2012/11/14/stuffed-allies-and-dignity-how-understanding-anxiety-can-save-the-day/

AS and anxiety. ^

Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:01:16
Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:04:47
Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:05:50

Rudy Simone's Aspergirls:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Aspergirls-Empowering-Females-Asperger-Syndrome/dp/1849058261

Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:06:08
Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:25:44
Apaintedveil Sun 17-Feb-13 18:33:37
apaintedveil Sat 16-Mar-13 15:53:45

Guardian article from 2012 - Gary Numan on family life and Aspergers:

www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/may/05/gary-numan-family-values-aspergers

apaintedveil Sat 16-Mar-13 15:54:54
apaintedveil Sat 16-Mar-13 16:04:12
apaintedveil Sat 16-Mar-13 16:05:28
apaintedveil Sat 16-Mar-13 23:35:42
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 15:54:57
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 20:52:28
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:06:39
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:09:57
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:10:55
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:12:16
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:14:38
apaintedveil Tue 14-May-13 21:24:24
apaintedveil Wed 10-Jul-13 10:14:54
apaintedveil Wed 10-Jul-13 10:15:24
apaintedveil Wed 10-Jul-13 10:20:22
apaintedveil Wed 10-Jul-13 10:35:41
apaintedveil Wed 10-Jul-13 10:36:57
TheLaminator Wed 10-Jul-13 12:36:28

Popped on here today for some advice/resorces...
Loads of helpful links here, thanks apaintedveil.

Things have been tough recently after a big move to a new country, I`m feeling very isolated & just a wee bit stressed!
My husbands AS diagnosis is fairly recent & although some things have become easier for him to deal with/understand with regaurds to how it effects HIM and a lot of things have fallen into place. But he is finding it hard to grasp that his disorder/wiring (still struggeling to find the correct word to use...) has a massive impact on the family too. We have two boys 5 & 30months.
I have read so many articles, forum pages etc & am gaining knowledge all the time, but, my husband refuses to read anything about it. He finds excuses not to do it... not enough hours in the day, dyslexia etc.
I`m feeling as if I`m the only one who is trying to find ways to cope & communicate better.
We argue and I feel like a bitch who is pissed of with someone with no legs not being able to walk (bad analogy, i know, i`m struggeling!).
He really has no idea the amount of allowence that I make for him & just how much organising I do to make family life run relitively smoothly. I am so worried of how this is/will effect the children, and my own mental well being .His not hearing/understanding me is a massive trigger for me due to childhood abuse.
Having a bad day and wondering how long we can keep up this un-healthy cycle. Each time I try to explain how I am feeling, he gets defensive & angry & thinks I am blaming him because his is 'Not Normal' (his words).
AAargh, I dont know...think i just needed a rant, but any advice/ personal experience appreciated.

MrsTwgtwf Wed 10-Jul-13 13:33:59

I have PM'd you, TheLaminator. smile

brightonmatt Fri 19-Jul-13 23:05:18

I have a diagnosis of AS, and am to become a first-time father next year at the age of 53. I have an amazingly capable and loving partner who has a 28 year-old daughter. Our families are being very supportive. I worry how my Aspergers will affect the way I react to fatherhood, and wonder if anyone else out there is/has been in a similar situation? Thanks for any advice!

Roseannie Sat 20-Jul-13 16:03:08

Hi brighton-my dh is 54 and has AS also. I would say that my dh struggled greatly when the dcs were babies and was no help/support to me whatsoever-he became much better with them as they got older.However,we were unaware of his AS back then and for that reason I think you will probably be ok actually.You are probably well aware of your strengths and difficulties and sound as if you are really thinking this throughsmile. Your partner also knowing about your AS will make a huge difference-I wish I had known about dh back then,16 yrs ago,as I would have been able to make allowances for his behaviour. I think my dh found the baby stage very hard as he couldnt relate to them but really bonded with the dcs as they learned to walk and talk.I would also say that despite everything ,dh is a great dad and loves them to bits and they adore him also.
Hope all goes well for you and your partnersmile.

MrsFrederickWentworth Sat 20-Jul-13 20:00:14

Brighton, going to pm you.

MrsTwgtwf Mon 19-Aug-13 15:09:24
MrsTwgtwf Mon 19-Aug-13 15:18:53
apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 14:20:07

www.pasda.org.uk/

PASDA seems to be a fantastic resource for people in Scotland. Scroll down that page to their resources link.

apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 14:39:32

In fact the PASDA Handbook here is quite remarkable. Lots of Scottish resources, but tons of info for people anywhere. Seriously, look at it. I'm stunned.

apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 14:45:35
apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 15:50:45
apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 15:52:12
apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 16:01:06

www.aspires-relationships.com/

There is a new pdf on the link: Marriage with Asperger’s Syndrome: 14 Practical Strategies. Recommended.

apaintedveil Fri 23-Aug-13 16:09:14
apaintedveil Fri 18-Oct-13 18:04:51
apaintedveil Fri 18-Oct-13 18:05:23
apaintedveil Thu 14-Nov-13 16:56:11
apaintedveil Fri 10-Jan-14 09:46:37
apaintedveil Fri 10-Jan-14 12:29:45
apaintedveil Tue 11-Mar-14 00:12:33

There's a new website here:

www.different-together.co.uk/

Derkyderpy Fri 30-May-14 23:23:05
Derkyderpy Fri 31-Oct-14 17:34:45

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now