Moderate cognitive impairment

[Vikingprincess]

My dad who is almost 90 has been assessed and given the above diagnosis. He has been told he doesn't have dementia but has MCI as a result of a slight stroke, a severe infection earlier this year and general 'vascular deterioration' of the white matter.

I don't know how best to deal with this and to help my mum. I live a long way away and only see them every few weeks/ months.

Some days my dad is pretty normal apart from slower speech and movements, but on other days he gets confused and is very irrational when it comes to making judgements on things. Basically, he gets a bee in his bonnet about something and won't let it go, along with numerous conspiracy theories he has about everything and everyone (with him as the victim.)

My mum is very emotional and tends to contradict him which can result in an aggressive verbal outburst from him and once a threat of physical violence. My brother who lives closer had to talk to him over this.

I suppose I want to know how to deal with him best- do we ignore his rants, when they are based on his 'fantasy' thoughts, contradict him, or just humour him? He seems so sincere when he's talking rubbish IYSWIM that it's so hard not to argue with him.

It's driving my mum mad and I feel worried for her health as she's finding it all quite hard. She doesn't drive so she is often stuck in the house with him for days on end without seeing anyone, they don't have the internet and haven't the ability now to use it.

[CMOTDibbler]

In my experience, its best to not contradict, but not encourage this sort of thing. So sort of like when children have imaginary friends, you might do the 'mmm, really, gosh' thing, and not say 'they don't exist' or bring them up yourself.

Do they live somewhere that your mum could get out on a mobility scooter?