I asterisk the word should as I'm really asking how handy you think you should be as a dad (or husband, if any ladies are reading), compared to how handy you actually are....
I consider myself to be a novice but I can do most car jobs (oil change, brake pads etc), and I've re-done our bathroom from scratch including plumbing and soil pipes, electrics etc... yet I still think I'm not as handy as I should be.
I was wondering whether you think a well rounded card-carrying dad should be handy... if so, is it the handier the better?
Obviously no one wants to be utterly un-handy, but the journey to becoming handy is paved with time and practise that could potentially be better invested in career-ing (to pay someone else to be handy) or days out with the family.
Is being non-handy a sign of failure in a dad these days? Or maybe being super handy is an antiquated badge of honour??
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How handy *should* a dad be?
Spannerface · 13/06/2015 20:59
Your post made me laugh. How many handy's is it possible to include in one paragraph 
Obviously no one wants to be utterly un-handy, but the journey to becoming handy is paved with time and practise that could potentially be better invested in career-ing (to pay someone else to be handy) or days out with the family.
^^
This. Someone of any gender who can make basic repairs or do a task competently is handy to have around the house. Someone who doesn't recognise their limitations and will bodge a job rather than pay a professional, or will actively use "DIY" task to avoid family work/activities is a royal pain in the ass.
You sound pretty handy on the DIY front. I mean this nicely but how well rounded are you at the "wifework"?
DH is awesomely good with his hands. 
He's worked in the motor trade, as a labourer, property maintenance and IT. He can change oil/tyres on the car, tile, lay carpet, paint and decorate, put up shelves properly, hang/fix doors, re-glaze windows and turn his hand to most diy tasks. When I spill gin on the laptop he can take it apart, dry it out and put it back together properly too!
He also likes growing stuff, cooking and making booze - and between him and MIL has a tool/powertool library that would rival the local Jewson!
Doesn't mean that I can't do some of this, it is just quicker and easier to let him get on with it. I'm pretty good at flat pack though.
It's a book but a universal term on MN to describe the post marital state of life where for some reason the work of organising family life, essentially an often horribly timeconsuming and unvalued set of activities leaving you emotionally exhausted and wondering if you were run over by a bus in the morning would your partner remember to feed the dog/children; is often passed to the female partner even though her male partner managed to competently do most of these things when they lived alone.
www.amazon.co.uk/Wifework-Susan-Maushart/dp/0747561729?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2135790-AIBU-to-be-sick-of-managing-our-lives-and-our-home
Debatable whether you need to read the book - just search on "wifework" within MN and you will find a hundred threads from women who are literally shaking with rage at the husband who has arrived home from work on a Friday, packed a bag in 5 mins flat and sat himself in the car tooting the horn wondering what is taking everyone else so long to be ready for the 2 week camping holiday or whatever.
There's a reason most divorces happen in January I think. It's because women all over the world have managed all the utter shite detritous of prepping for a family Christmas and then watched a partner swan in and take all the credit by carving the turkey.
I'm not having a go - just something to be aware of. You could be the handiest most competent person in the world but having to ask a spouse to do everything because they lack the imagination to anticipate a set of tasks will kill a marriage stone dead.
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