Weddings - A man's view.

(42 Posts)
Changlingz Thu 16-Aug-12 21:30:33

Inspired by another thread.

Now my ex when we (she) decided to get married, said one of the best things I've ever heard.

'I can't be arsed with the big wedding, do you fancy just going off and getting married abroad?'

I've never met a man who was bothered about a big do.

And for any wedding planners, the best wedding I went to was the one where they brought out stacks of bacon rolls at 11pm.

And I couldn't tell you what the theme was at any of them was, or what the bridesmaids wore.

Is this typical? I think it is.

MrGin Fri 17-Aug-12 10:05:01

I used to take wedding photos when I was at college to help pay the bills.

I just found them so formulaic I wondered about supplying the same set to different couples with the odd face replaced in photoshop.

On the other Wedding thread someone makes the point that the bigger the wedding the quicker it's likely to fail, it being a reflection of peoples expectations.

It's all about people in my view not the amount spent. And boy o boy do some people spend spend spend spend.

My brother was married in a humanist ceremony in my parents garden wearing a purple suit ( take note Pan ) . It wasn't massively expensive, but was massively enjoyable.

Changlingz Fri 17-Aug-12 10:13:30

I think women judge other women about weddings.

I've never heard a man say 'look at those bridesmaids dresses they clash with the carpet'

CakeBump Fri 17-Aug-12 10:20:32

I've never heard a woman say that either, OP hmm

UnimaginitiveDadThemedUsername Fri 17-Aug-12 10:37:54

I wanted a do, but I didn't want it to be ruinously expensive with loads of ludicrous single-use fripperies.

The soon-to-be Mrs U. felt the same way - she just saw it as a big party.

Which is really what it is, when you come down to it. Most people don't give a tuppeny fuck about getting things like flamingos for the lawn.

Changlingz Fri 17-Aug-12 10:40:48

Go and have a look at some wedding forums.

They're bonkers.

hmm

UnimaginitiveDadThemedUsername Fri 17-Aug-12 10:42:12

Got any links?

QuenelleOJersey2012 Fri 17-Aug-12 10:50:24

I'm going to a wedding tomorrow. We're travelling there and back by minibus with the bride and groom and their families, there will be lots of young children there, the bride is buying her own flowers from Waitrose, and they have said they don't want any presents. Can't wait.

peoplesrepublicofmeow Fri 17-Aug-12 14:36:03

weddings take on a life of there own, we managed to keep ours fairly tame, and got married as soon as possible after the proposal as we could.
we financed it ourselves which mean we had total control, when i see some of my friends big weddings and all the family had to be invited at the cost of cutting out some of the bride and grooms friends, that wasnt for us. but yeah with aid comes influence.

so i hired a kilt, OH wore white trousers ( heard the jokes about who weres the trousers allready) we walked to the town hall, and hired the towns old exchange building for the do afterwards. here in holland BTW you pay for every drink and the dutch are shocked that we have pay-bars at parties in england, they say
"thats not a party then, it's just asking for mates to come down the pub"

BalloonSlayer Fri 17-Aug-12 14:40:46

I love it when a bloke has been to a wedding and you say < breathless > "So? What was her dress like?"

And you get:

"Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr . . . I think it was white."

EldritchCleavage Fri 17-Aug-12 14:41:47

Wedding forums are self-selecting: you only really go on them if you are a fairly hardcore bride, I think.

We got from proposal to wedding in 5 weeks: registry office, special bus charter, restaurant meal no disco or evening do. Was fabulous. Neither of us wanted more.

FateLovesTheFearless Fri 17-Aug-12 14:45:35

I got married with two weeks to prepare, registry office and a pub afterwards. If I was to marry again in the future I think I would like to do it 'properly' as such but not in a church or a registry office. I also wouldn't want something massive, just close friends and family. But a little bit more fancy than a registrar!

We had an average sized wedding, and I found it easier to say what I didnt want than what I actually wanted. Didn't want fresh flowers, didnt want masses of people (68 with only 5 addition evening quests) and my evening meal was the best ever, we had pork baps with stuffing, and hot dogs smile for pudding we offered our guests chocolate eclairs and jam doughnuts.

DH was kind of averagely interested in the wedding, but largely felt he'd done enough by proposing!! We purposely kept the costs down so we could have a bigger honeymoon!!!

A bigger wedding doesn't equal more married!!

ScarlettCrossbones Fri 17-Aug-12 14:49:37

BalloonSlayer my DP is a wedding photographer and I ask him every time he comes home from one "What was the first dance song?" (the only bit I'm really interested in grin) and I get the same "Umm ... I think it was ... that one ... oh, wait a minute ... can't remember." Every time!

Dahlen Sat 18-Aug-12 10:53:21

If I ever got married again (unlikely) I fancy doing something totally unusual like skydiving. grin

Never, ever wanted the big white wedding thing <shudders> but would definitely have a great big party afterwards to celebrate. Any excuse for a party is good in my book!

AdoraBell Sat 25-Aug-12 04:49:19

I couldn't face the prospect of being the centre of attention. OH mistakenly thought that every woman wanted a solitaire diamond and a fairytale white wedding like his first wife He genuinely thought he had let me down in some way when a vicar told us he couldn't marry us as OH was "still married in the eyes of God"

When the STBMIL said - ooh, I have a wedding to plan - I knew I had to put my foot down.

We had a small civil ceremony, 35 guests despite MIL's cats bum face about the rest of the family being left out, a nice lunch and then went home. I didn't even wear white (or ivory). She's never forgiven me grin

charleyturtle Sun 02-Jun-13 20:35:52

im letting my dp plan (pretty much) the entire wedding. if it came down to me i would have registry office or church with a few family and friends then off to the pub. no bridesmaids or big wedding dress. but my dp said he wanted a bigger fancier do, so i told him if he wanted that he could organise it himself and i will just give him some money towards it and show up when and where he tells me.

Weddings are better looked back on. They go so quickly that without a decent record of the the day. The most important people on the day are the Bride and Groom, yet they only get to relive the day through the video or a decent photobook over a glass of wine after the honeymoon.

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