The BESH bush is severely overgrown and in need of some serious TLC preferably by a tall dark and handsome topless man with a can of diet coke in his hand.

(1000 Posts)
OhBuggerMe Fri 19-Jul-13 09:14:17

Are you over 30?
Have you been ttc for over 12 months?
Are you hag like?
Do you like gin?

If the answer to all of the above is yes then this is the place for you. Seek out the BESHtionairre and submit it for our pleasure perusal.

Baby dusters and instadiffers need not apply.

<gets out bush for inspection>

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Jul-13 09:21:10

I have been known to make HOTB pose with a diet coke. Shallow, moi? grin

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 19-Jul-13 09:51:29

Sod having the bush trimmed, just give me a diet coke.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Jul-13 10:25:58

Pleased to kick the new thread off on a positive note. There is an actual baybee in my tum tum and it's got a heart n' everything grin

<cries with relief>

KeepTheFaithBaby Fri 19-Jul-13 10:28:09

Hooray grin Flipping awesome Frank! Well done tiny baybee!

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 19-Jul-13 10:30:42

Dusty in here innit? I seem to have something in my eyes.. <sobs slightly with pleasure for frank>

KeepTheFaithBaby Fri 19-Jul-13 10:43:03

<sniffs> er, yeah. Mine is erm, hayfever?!

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 10:45:08

Yippee! Phew! Yippee! Gin! Phew! Yippee!

(A friend of mine with mad landlords has a large hedge in the front garden. It never got trimmed by the mad landlords, and one day my friend had to listen seriously whilst a neighbour complained at length about her front bush. She kept saying " your front bush is out of control. I'm complaining to the council about your front bush" etc.)

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Jul-13 10:49:44

Hooray, Frank! grin grin grin

And <cackle> at Moll grin

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Jul-13 10:54:07

Aww, you guys blush Fish slaps and gin all round!

We're going to go to the cinema this afternoon to just chill out, we've just booked to see The World's End so that should be fun.

SinkyMalinks Fri 19-Jul-13 11:22:22


lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 19-Jul-13 12:55:54

Hurrah for the baybee with heart beat and all, enjoy the cinema frankie. And arf at moll.

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 14:16:50

BE has just told me that for ages when I mentioned talking to my gang of online fellow barrens, he thought I was saying barons..

Nokkie73 Fri 19-Jul-13 14:33:25

cap'n tell him that we're international fish smugglers (Barramundi Barons) who show no mercy to instadiffers or those ballsacks who throw fucking baby dust everywhere.

frank how blooming marvellous. Hurrah for baybee Frank.

driz I have gorn and lost the old Fred. Did you have something going dahn tomorrow, as we say in ThatThere London. I am sure you did (like something important. blush

slinks I said it on the other Fred but con bloody gratulations again grin

Hello to all you other gawjus BESHies. I have just made 96 cupcakes. Fuck the gods, that was hard.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Jul-13 15:47:37

96 Nokks?! Blimey, are you hungry? wink

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 16:10:43

<hops on bus to Noks place for cake binge>

Ballsack is just best insult isn't it?
Next week I will use the sentence "Jog on, you ballsack" if anyone displeases me.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 19-Jul-13 16:36:08

Where is the cake fest? Can I come too? I like ball sack a lot... Can I use it too next week, or maybe this weekend already?

What are the haggish plans for the weekend? Frank will be engaged in staring the peanut picture, nokkie is cake binging, but the rest of you? My only fixed engagement is picking up our embie tomorrow smile

SinkyMalinks Fri 19-Jul-13 17:02:14

Ooh Driz. Will you give us minute by minute updates?

Managed to wrangle a scan at work. Bit of an anticlimax. There is something there, but early. Can't say much more. Back in 10 days.

But that's good news right?

OhBuggerMe Fri 19-Jul-13 17:04:50

Will be thinking of you tomorrow driz let ysus know how you get on.

As for insults I like: fuckwit, long streak of witch piss, and nob jockey.

This afternoon I have done all the housework, 4 loads of washing, painted the fence and gate and made a bannana loaf. I am now covered in fence stain waiting for the shower curtain to finish in the washing machine so I can have a wash!

SinkyMalinks Fri 19-Jul-13 17:11:39

Cunt badger.

Is an insult I like.

OhBuggerMe Fri 19-Jul-13 17:13:00

Yes sinks that is very good news. You are releasing enough Hcg to make. cbd turn to 3+ weeks. 10 days is a long time though.

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Jul-13 17:16:25

Wow, Bugs, that has put me to shame. I have wiped the cobwebs off the outside brolly and unhooked the washing line in order to put up said brolly. Aside from that, I've sat outside reading (and sleeping), and inside watching the Tour. I've prepped the veg for dinner, too... #lazyarse

Good luck Driz! Hope all goes well smile

I have no plans for tomorrow, but on Sunday I am getting up in the small hours and driving across East Anglia to pick up HOTB and friend (and their bikes) after their overnight bike ride. And then driving them back, while they sleep, I suspect. I am contemplating taking a disposable barbecue and some bacon for them, but they're probably going to be there before me, and therefore it would lose some of the fun...

Nokkie73 Fri 19-Jul-13 17:28:04

I am being a dutiful daughter and preparing cupcakes and cake pops for my mum and dad's wedding anniversary tomorrow. I made........ahem........five spares. For tasting. I cannot let anything leave my kitchen in a less than perfect state so i have had to taste each batch. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it m'lud <is immediately arrested by the Porky Pig Police for extreme gluttony>

If you'all fancy it then follow the trail of crumbs.

drizz that is sooooooooo exciting. I hope Lembie (see what I did there ? Well, I amalgamated the words Lemon and Embie and I shut the fuck up ) settles in and becomes a baybee in your tumtum.

In one word, ballsack says so much. I adore the word. So yes, go forth my sweary children and use it.

Nokkie73 Fri 19-Jul-13 17:29:28

slinks that's great news. grin

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 19-Jul-13 18:20:55

I like the gluttony, noks. Have a good time at the anniversary as well!

I might not come and update you but retreat to the internet-free zone of my parental home and laze in their backyard for the weekend. But I'll be sure to tell you all about it, when we're back.

Not particularly worried about the physical side of ET, have had 7 IUIs and a MC coming through that same foof after all wink just very curious about the quality and numbers of Lembies, we've made. I like it noks. And the Lembie has a RL-name already better than nearmiss, I hasten to add

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Jul-13 18:55:37

Slinks, I agree that the scan is good news. It fits in with the fact that you only recently got a positive so try not to worry. Hypocrite talking, I know!

Nokks, that is some impressive bakeage!

Bugs you put the rest of us to shame, since we got back from the cinema I have, er eaten a bowl of pasta and slept.

Speaking of the cinema, The World's End was very good. If you like Shaun of the Dead/Hot Fuzz you will definitely like it. Simon Pegg is rapidly moving up the charts towards being my Embarrassing Crush!

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 18:56:48

Ugh - I sense approaching droid, bloaty and really really stupid today. Why does my menstrual cycle affect my ability to think? What's the point of that, Mother Nature?

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 18:57:35

Sorry, Sinkers, good about the scan.
<illustrates previous post>

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Jul-13 18:57:37

Oops, of course best of luck for ET tomorrow Drizz. Do you only get 1 put back? Do you know what condition they're all in?

FizzyFeet Fri 19-Jul-13 19:02:04

Good luck Lembie for tomorrow!

And sinky yes, that is good news. Being in the right place is definitely a positive and it won't be long before you'll see it's little malikny heart beating! Hurrah for franklet too!

Good skills everyone on being out and about in the sunshine. I am currently drinking fizzy booze in the park mid punting trip - tis vey nice. I'm rather enjoying my rebellious drinking phase while we wait for the old ivf to start. and only slightly worried about my ability to give it up

FizzyFeet Fri 19-Jul-13 19:04:07

Sorry to hear about impending droid, moll
<pushes droid face down into the river>

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 19-Jul-13 20:05:45

Sorry about the droidal invasion moll

bugs and norks your productiveness puts me to shame

sinky I had a scan last week and they couldn't see much of anything either, and I'm back on the 29th so fingers crossed for both of us.

Today I went shopping in Bluewater with HWCA. I had to get shorts in a size bigger than normal and, completely ignoring the top in a smaller size, I bawled and sobbed. Even at the till I was a blubbering incomprehensible mess. Lovely.

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Jul-13 21:11:42

Bluewater'll do that to you, Twinks. Terrible place.

SinkyMalinks Fri 19-Jul-13 21:36:03

Twinks- I'm 30th. Mutual handholding fish slapping?

I don't know blue water, but I presume it's a bigger, and even more hideous (although v similar overall) than the Trafford Centre. Even on beautiful days, it is to be avoided.

(But its ok on derby day here)

FriendofDorothy Fri 19-Jul-13 23:02:53

I hate shopping full stop. I am so giganticus at the moment that I really feel only clothes from Mountain Warehouse will fit me.

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 19-Jul-13 23:14:42

I wish there was a like button on MN. Molls last post I like vaaaary much! titter**

I have been to a burlesque night, lots of buzzwhams and bottoms flying all over the place. 'twas awesomo.

Bearfacedchic Sat 20-Jul-13 01:08:29

Gosh, a new thread already? Impressive speed of chat, ladies. <settles ample bottom into minute space>

Congrats Slink- that's wonderful news!

Well done, Frank on hearing heartbeat <melty heart>

Rasp- burlesque?! You are so cool. <transfers girl crush to Rasp>

Draf- you are awesome for picking up OH. Bike ride sounds brill but scary!

Twinks - I know Bluewater. Beats Lakeside every time for me. Sorry about the blubbing, but I'm sure you won't mind once you get more baybee on show. smile

drizz- good luck for tomorrow with Lembie (love it!)

Hello to everyone else. Happy weekend!

Oh and I LOVE ballsack and am a frequent user. I also enjoy knobcheese, dickweed and ballache ( the latter being for things which are just plain irritating and naturally, some people can be this too), to name but a few.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 08:18:31

I didn't actually do any burlesque I hasten to add. Dancing round a pole with a bikini and stripping to nipple tassels and a thing are two very different things, I don't have half the required balls for the latter!

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 08:18:55

Good luck today drizzle!

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 20-Jul-13 08:22:58

Very best of luck drizzle, we're all rooting for you.

rasp I love a bit of burlesque. Great fun.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 08:28:06

Good luck today Drizz and with dealing with the parentals wink

Rasp I've always been tres jealous of your flexibility/pole talent grin

CaptainMoll Sat 20-Jul-13 08:36:05

Good luck Drizzamitizz!

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 08:36:17

It was great Twink! Would love to do it but classes are on Sunday afternoons. I might see, it's not really a fitness thing but if I do win a bayberree it might keep me entertained whilst I'm off the pole smile

Frank great news, and how exciting to hear a heartbeat. Hope you have given your body a stern telling off for scaring the shit out of you for no reason
Drizz FX for Lembie today

SinkyMalinks Sat 20-Jul-13 09:32:48

Good luck Driz. Enjoy the technology free weekend (that was the plan, right?).

<quietly cheering on Lembie>

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 09:33:02

I ought to say, we didn't hear the heartbeat, it's still too teeny, we just saw it flickering on the screen.

The sonographer was lovely and explained everything as she went. She started with a normal external ultrasound and while it picked up the pregnancy sac, the bean was too small to see so she asked if I was happy having an internal. I realise now that I was a little blasé and think I surprised her when replying "I've had lots of those. Crack on!" blush

One thing, on an unrelated note, that did impress me was, while in the loo doing a urine sample, there was a notice by the sink saying "If you are suffering domestic violence and would like to talk to a nurse in private please take a sticker and place it in your sample pot". I just thought it was nice to see steps being taken to help vulnerable women.

KeepTheFaithBaby Sat 20-Jul-13 10:37:34

I never heard a heart beat at a scan. Saw it at scans, heard it on a Doppler. I'm wondering if the hearing a hb on a scan is a tv lie? Or American thing?

Have a good transfer drizz! Praying for a sticky one.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 10:52:31

Sounds like a tv lie Faith, like waking up after a night of rampant sex with perfect hair and makeup.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 20-Jul-13 11:02:49

Quite nervous - and according to SB really irritating - so I cleaned the balcony. At least something useful done. We're debating the technology free weekend, as the parentals live by the sea and we're not sure whether I can swim post-transfer and it would be very unusual for me not to go... So it'll be discussed later.

Yay for heart beat, whichever way it was detected!

I always think they must have those really horrid hair dos that stay in place through everything AND permanent make up. I have neither, so I look insane when I wake up...

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 11:09:25

HWHNN calls me "Straw Peter" when I wake up. Apparently it's the name of a scarecrow in a book his mum read to him as a child hmm

Take things easy Drizz, and give SB a kick up the arse for calling you irritating, You're allowed to be under the circumstances!

JethroTull Sat 20-Jul-13 11:11:19

Good luck today Drizz. Hope it goes ok & sending you & Lembie some sticky thoughts. Have you got plans for the 2ww?

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 11:14:59

Live kitten birth thread here if anyone is having a slow morning grin <squee>

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 11:39:09

I'm having a slow morning, I feel like I had a skinful last night and in fact all I had was a pint of coke and one glass of red. Urrrggghhhh

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 20-Jul-13 12:18:25

Have you had enough water rasp? Tis very hot.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 12:38:27

I've been drinking, had a pint of water with me through the show too. I don't drink coke really so I wonder whether that hasn't helped.? I may as well have gone and got hammered, feel shattered

OhBuggerMe Sat 20-Jul-13 12:40:24

Morning Hags. Will be thinking of you today driz.

I've started using the CBD OPK's, no smily faces yet but i'm not expecting any. Had bloody good sechs last night after a bit of a heart to heart with GP. We work SO well as a team but our sex life / flirting is kinda the last priority and we've agreed to be more tactile / flirty with each other. Its not easy when TTCing has sucked most of the 'spark' out of things.

Oh, and i've hidden the legs in the air thread. The OP is clearly unhinged.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 12:58:31

Can sympathise with that Bugs, same thing has happened to us, we need to take a step back and get flirty again. It's so hard though, as much as I try, MATV just assumes its cuz I'm ovulating so clams up. I just want a bloody good seeing to! <<ahem>> pardon me blush

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 13:08:57

Morning all. Weirdly, it's not so hot today, just a pleasant 22C ish. I'm having a rather weepy morning so far, feeling sad about TTC/IVF and a bit headachey as well. It's probably being exacerbated by antihistamines, though - some evil creature bit me a couple of days ago and now my right hand looks like it's dressed up as a puffer fish.

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 13:17:11

Oh, and I've just started rereading one of my all-time favourite series, that begins with Assassin's Apprentice by Robin Hobb. I've not read them for a couple of years, and it's like cuddling an old friend. Even though I am less than halfway through the first book and have cried already...

SinkyMalinks Sat 20-Jul-13 13:32:00

Ooh. A friend got me onto that series last year draff. I got distracted by GOT, but need to go back to them I think. Enjoy!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 20-Jul-13 13:55:55

Perfect 8-cell Lembie on Board. Now off to google percentages wink

Sechsing, I wish, the evil foof-tablets really take the appeal away. But good on you bugsy!

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 20-Jul-13 14:13:52

Well done on the Lembie driz! Great news. stay away from Google

draf sorry you're feeling so bad, I'm glad you've got a good book to cuddle up with. I always feel better when a book has taken me out of myself for a while.

Good work on the sechs bugs. I'm not allowed to even touch HWCA with a finger tip at the moment because of the heat.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 20-Jul-13 14:30:10

Well done Drizz! If I get an embie I'm going to call it emberryo I think.

Sorry you are feeling shitty draf, have a good cry and let it all out, I find it therapeutic!

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Jul-13 14:59:22

Well done on the perfect Lembie Drizz, but definitely step away from Google <stern face>

Draf, agree that a little cry (for non-serious reasons) can be beneficial. Films and books are the best route.

I don't think I could manage any sechs at the moment, feel far too queasy. Plus, it's too hot. Poor HWHNN!

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 15:45:10

Thanks, BESHes smile

Just seen HOTB off, hopefully he will get to the start (and then the finish) of his bike ride okay. Roll on my 4am start to go fetch them home! hmm

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 15:46:27

Oh, and excellent news, Lem! Hopefully Lembie is getting comfy smile

Giraffe, are the men doing 100 miles on the bike?

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 18:25:30

It's the Dunwich Dynamo, Merk (from Southwark to Dunwich), so about 120 miles. HOTB is laden down with lights, water, and jelly babies to fuel him through it grin

Guessed so.VVTM's 2 friends are doing it, only reason VVTM is not is due to family birthday tomorrow. You're not in London (ish) are you? NB I understand hundreds of people are doing it and therefore likelihood of you being friends wife = 0

evilgiraffe Sat 20-Jul-13 19:00:07

No, Cambridge - hence having to pick them up, as trains back here are impossible on a Sunday morning! HOTB is looking forward to it smile

KeepTheFaithBaby Sat 20-Jul-13 20:27:11

It's cooler here too, bedroom is 20degrees instead of 24! I'm pleased to report the pillow speaker works a treat! I can hear it, DH can't. Actually it's easier to get the volume right than on my headphones. I'll add the link if anyone is interested.

I had a good day Pauling yesterday. Sat at the table for dinner and threw 1/3 away! Today I have not done so well! Had a BBQ and I stuffed it away. Ah we'll starting again from now. Have a snoozing baby on mr. Will settle her and see if in actually hungry. Might just have fruit.

I was the same with low carbing. I missed carbs! Also it's quite expensive to do and hard to maintain a variety of protein choices, especially at breakfast. I think I will dig my curves book out just for the recipes and snack choices. The principle of 3 meals/2 snacks a day is a good one and thru have good snack ideas.

KeepTheFaithBaby Sat 20-Jul-13 20:27:49

Oops wrong thread! Sorry! blush

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 20-Jul-13 20:37:53

I want a link to the pillow speaker and I want to know what Pauling is!

V jealous of Cambridge! Lived in Suffolk for a while and lusted after living in Cambridge except for the cyclists I nearly knocked off their bikes every time I went
Also intrigued by Pauling and the pillow grin

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 20-Jul-13 21:05:07

Oh! I know! It's using the Paul McKenna approach to eating. Eating mindfully, not getting too hungry, stop when satisfied. My sister lost a fair bit of weight on it.

KeepTheFaithBaby Sat 20-Jul-13 21:15:04

Twink is right! I'm on a thread in weight loss chat about it. pillow speaker link here grin

I have family near Ely so we go a lot.

Bearfacedchic Sun 21-Jul-13 00:25:28

I love Cambridge. Would definitely like to live there, but alas it's too expensive for us at the mo. I love the green spaces and that it's so walkable and cycle-friendly, quaint and yet still has lots of good shops. Love it.

Well done on Lembie drizz. Hope Lembie settles in well.

evilgiraffe Sun 21-Jul-13 10:11:14

It is fabulous. Not that I live actually in town, mind, but close enough grin

Bearfacedchic Sun 21-Jul-13 10:28:30

So lucky draf. grin

OhBuggerMe Sun 21-Jul-13 21:05:00

Today I have spent £425 on motorbike gear si I can go out properly with GP.....I'm sensing an ironidiff coming up!!

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 21-Jul-13 21:14:35

Oooh fun bugs! HWCA has delayed me getting stuff to go out on his bike for years, and it looks awesome. When's your first trip out?

OhBuggerMe Sun 21-Jul-13 21:25:17

I've been out with him a few times and worn his spare stuff but its all massive on me and I feel a total idiot in it. Now I've got mine I'll be happy to go further with him and out more often.

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 21-Jul-13 21:43:05

MATV took me round a field once on a motorbike, I shart myself massively before he'd even hit 30mpr!

OhBuggerMe Sun 21-Jul-13 22:04:24

I'm a bit of a speed / danger junkie. If IVF fails I'll do my cbt & test and get my own bike.

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 21-Jul-13 23:15:13

How exiting bugs! Can imagine you with a massive Harley roaring round the streets smile you'll have to get loads of tattoos mind you. You'll probably have to grow a beard too!

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Jul-13 08:30:45

Have you read <I>Good Omens</I> by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, Bugs? I can just see you dressed up like War - she was brilliant.

I've never been on a motorbike. My dad had one when I was small and always promised to take me out on it when I was big enough. Then when I was big enough, he sold it sad Though I suppose I did have a go <I>in utero</I> when my parents went on holiday the summer before I was born...

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Jul-13 08:31:54

Heh, look at my automatic use of HTML. By <I></I> I mean ^ of course - italics!

OhBuggerMe Mon 22-Jul-13 11:18:01

Not read that one draf. I prefer chicklit pure trash!

I cannot be bothered with work today. I'm so.bloody bored.

OhBuggerMe Mon 22-Jul-13 12:09:39

Oh great...Peter Andres 12 year old girlfriend is pregnant. And to think I actually liked him sad

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Jul-13 12:19:35

It's very funny, so long as you're not offended by blasphemy. Also is an homage to the Just William books - again, hilarious smile

Meh re Peter Andre. I'd rather be barren with HOTB than pregnant by someone so vacuous.

eurozammo Mon 22-Jul-13 13:49:58

Afternoon hags. As you will have seen from t'other place I am back, and wowed by the fecundity of the last fred.

frank I'm glad that all seems well post-bleed.

bugs I'm moving oop norf. 5k in nursery fees?!? It's a grand a month round here.

As for me, I'm very unhappy at being back at my desk. I want to be lazing around a poolside with some pulp fiction in my hands. The week away did take my mind off ttc though. I feel very relaxed now. I'm sure that will disappear as IVF#3 looms.

Bearfacedchic Mon 22-Jul-13 17:04:24

Nice to see you back Euro.

Bugs- tres exciting. I would love a bike. GS would really not love me to have a bike. I think I'd be crap though and would probably kill myself! (Accidentally, of course.) Compromise is I don't have a bike. hmm

I agree draf. Would rather not with Mr Andre. I too, would rather be barren. Although it does feel like I blink and someone else is diffed.

I'm off to see Monsters University tonight. Anyone seen it? Or just me and my family who enjoy kiddy films?

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Jul-13 17:58:36

Ohh, report back, bear! We are off to see The World's End tomorrow, but Monsters U is next on our list...

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 22-Jul-13 18:00:47

Ohhhhh I wanna see monsters uni. No way will I be able to convince MATV to go in this weather. Pretty sure out shitty cinema won't have air con :/

We saw The World's End on Friday. It's very good, darker than the previous two and I'd describe it as more reflective rather than out and out funny. Brilliant soundtrack too!

FizzyFeet Mon 22-Jul-13 18:42:28

Nice name change, frank!

Ta fizzy! Would you believe it I got quoted in the friggin Daily Mail Online with a post I put on the Royal Baby thread so I decided a name change was in order!

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Jul-13 21:43:52

<hands Frank the salmon of shame> wink

What on earth did you say?!

I just said I got a bit teary on hearing that DoC had gone into labour and that my pregnancy hormones must be to blame. I felt all dirty that a DM journo was reading about me.

BTW it was another poster that spotted the quote (along with others off the thread), I wasn't trawling the sidebar of shame, oh no I've never done that <lies>

eurozammo Mon 22-Jul-13 22:00:02

Love the name change!

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Jul-13 22:40:32

I've had a lovely day off in the sun with friends and then watching Worlds End, then I looked on the Internet by mistake and it's all about frickin babies. I'm hiding in here, where it's all about frickin babies. hmmgrin

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Jul-13 22:40:53

Good name Frankie!

Bearfacedchic Mon 22-Jul-13 23:45:03

Great name Frank!


Bearfacedchic Tue 23-Jul-13 00:07:38

Was supposed to say Monsters was fab, but then I really like that sort of thing. There was a good short before it too about some umbrellas. Sounds odd, but was good. I want to go and see Worlds End too. Right up my street.

Well done on becoming 'famous', Frank, although I would feel sullied too. hmm

I feel Iike death and I don't think it's just the friggin too hot to sleep weather. I've got lower back ache and achey limbs. Think I may have a virus as I've had similar before. I don't think anyone has cared that I'm labouring with back pain though. Can't think why! grin My whole FB has turned into a pro-Royalist vs. anti-Royalist war zone. I'm bored with it, but I can't hide everyone's posts now, can I?

Oh please let it rain! I'm too hot and I'd love a good thundering!

SinkyMalinks Tue 23-Jul-13 06:35:23

Well, the thunderstorm has arrived here grin

We had, I think, 2 storms in the night. At least I got woken up twice! It's raining again now. My lawn was starting to resemble the Masai Mara!

Frankel you're famous! I was chuckling when I saw you quoted!!

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Jul-13 07:49:32

Thunderstorm arrived here at 2.30am, humph. And another one is here now, and there has been a shitload of rain. All this is fine, but irritating because we left the chairs outside last night, so I'll have to put them in the bath to dry off...

OhBuggerMe Tue 23-Jul-13 07:50:22

I had to take the dogs out in this!! <points to the sky>

Morning hags...managed the sechs last night and got a flashing smiley on the cb opk this morning which the ever so helpful leaflet tells me means high fertility.

Today is my wedding anniversary and a friend (well annoying drip who's turned into a complete baby bore) has put a really salt in wounds status on fb re not knowing she was diffed 3 years ago (at my wedding) and now her 2 yr old is doing x,y & z. OH FUCK OFF.

Nice name change frank

Hello to all other Besh

Happy Anniversary Bugs. Respond with a nice passive agressive "3 years ago I was getting trollied with my soul mate"

It's our 5th wedding anniversary in September - where the heck did that time go?!

OhBuggerMe Tue 23-Jul-13 08:35:57

tbh she's with a fuckwit and he's married to someone else still so I have all the salt I need.

eurozammo Tue 23-Jul-13 10:38:52

Happy anniversary bugs!

Today, I should have been 6 months preggo. Hey ho.

Bearfacedchic Tue 23-Jul-13 11:04:56

Sorry Euro. X

Bugs- I got a fuckwit message too telling me to 'stay positive'. Firstly, I never said I wasn't and secondly, the person saying this is a fine one to talk. Silly cah. I hate it too when people ask in RL. Why can't they just have the tiny nonce it takes to work out that I'll talk about it when I feel ready and asking is just plain insensitive? I'd get that salt ready Bugs.

Bearfacedchic Tue 23-Jul-13 11:06:06

Oh yes and happy anniversary bugs!

OhBuggerMe Tue 23-Jul-13 11:25:36

Sorry Euro tis really shit isn't it.

'friend'at work has been for a scan this morning following twin ivf embryo transfer a few weeks ago. I'm dying to ask how it went but not sure I can face the answer.

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Jul-13 15:17:40

Hard situations, euro and bugs sad Gentle fish strokes for you both <hands over the stickleback of serenity>

I've just had a phone call. Drucks are being delivered on Thursday shock Letter with stabbing schedule is due this week. Holy shit, we might be doing this rather soon...

OhBuggerMe Tue 23-Jul-13 16:13:53

Holy shit indeed draf!! Exciting & scary all at the same time.

Bearfacedchic Tue 23-Jul-13 16:42:26

Cool and shit sticks all at the same time Draf! You could have a baybee in your tum soon smile

Bearfacedchic Tue 23-Jul-13 16:43:35

Sorry, just re-read your post Bugs and didn't mean to copy it! blush

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Tue 23-Jul-13 17:35:23

Happy anniversary bugs. That friend needs her head sorting!

Sorry about the shit anniversary euro. Holds out the slightly smelly cod of comfort.

And make sure you share with draf. IVF-druck delivery is one of those OMGOMGOMGOMG moments. And there is more than you need. Honestly. But it could land you with a win, clearly worth it. And you get to stop DRing at some point, also a good thing!

bear snigger. People in RL can be thick. It takes years of training that I really hope you won't have.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Tue 23-Jul-13 17:36:44

Btw frank hmm at your quote. Grim that he was reading.

Waves at the other hags.

OhBuggerMe Tue 23-Jul-13 22:31:32

hags I am so annoyed with.myself. Before my holibobs I was completely immersed in healthy eating & exercise so much so that I actually....for the first time ever felt good in a bikini. Since then I can't seem able to get on and stay on the wagon. I can't turn off my obsession with food and my wobbly bits are coming back. What can I do?

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 23-Jul-13 22:49:44

Mmmmm, eat loads and loads of food but only buy good healthy food. That's how I did it, just ate shit loads but good stuff so wasn't really missing the bad stuff then after a couple of weeks found I needed less of everything and wasn't craving bad stuff. Take loads of snacks to work. Drink loads of water, eat like a queen

I've just been to a self defence class, it was awesome!

CaptainMoll Tue 23-Jul-13 23:32:40

Is it a sweet tooth or a savoury desire? I found fresh smoothies helped me get my sweet tooth under control - sweet and yummy fresh fruit with almond milk felt a bit like treating myself to ice cream, but was much better for me.
Also what Rasps said - get yourself a green veg addiction instead..
Also also, don't beat yourself up for failing. It's a bit like alcoholism or something in that you just have to do it one day at a time. If you eat a chocolate bar, don't hate yourself, just notice that you feel shit about it and promise yourself to do better tomorrow.
I'm working really hard making these changes myself and falling off the wagon, so I know how you feel. Comfort food is my thing, and it's hard kicking that habit. Feels good when you manage it though.

Pep talk over, as you were, troops. grin

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 00:57:22

The rain did come last night btw with a vengeance too. I was asleep by then though.

Well done Moll on your shift to healthiness. Here, have a crown

Bugs- it sounds like you did brilliantly before your hols so just try and do what the others said to get yourself back on track. See it as a blip rather than a fail. Jeez, I wouldn't be seen dead in a bikini so you must have been doing something right. I do what Moll said and no food is 'banned' for me otherwise I end up craving it and pigging out. Instead, if I have something I try to only have a small bit to satisfy the craving and then stop. It's hard at first, but really satisfying when you manage it. I got hold of an e book that really helped me called 'How to have your cake and your skinny jeans too'. Despite the naff title, it really helped me understand my eating habits. I also started exercising 6 days a week. This probably seems excessive, but I have an otherwise quite sedentary lifestyle so I need to. Plus I like it. I'm also setting myself fitness challenges like 10k races so that I can't eat crap and I have to be fit enough to do them. And the other weird thing I did was to join Instagram and signed myself up to loads of users who had transformed their bodies. It gives me weird daily inspiration. I know a lot of what I've done sounds odd, but it has helped me and I've so far lost half a stone, but more importantly I've lost inches. 6 off both my waist and chest so far.

Anyway, I hope this helps somehow, even if it makes you decide what you don't want to do! grin Obviously not everyone is as gung ho as I am, but you just do what you need to I guess.

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 01:00:08

Ps. The crown was genuinely meant Moll. Respect for your hard work as I know how difficult it is.

eurozammo Wed 24-Jul-13 10:35:20

bugs I'm the same. I feel like my body has been F888ed by IVF and the mc. I'm now a stone heavier than when I got married 3 years ago and half a stone heavier than I was going into my first IVF in January. I have NEVER struggled with my weight so I find this quite depressing. My diet hasn't changed much but the IVFs and mc and headbump removal have all affected my ability to exercise this year, and I guess gym 3 x week at say 500 cals a time = 1500 extra cals a week, which equates to about a pound in weight every fortnight I'm not working out. That'll do it.

draf I completed flipped out at IVF drug removal and made KFZK hide them. He stuffed most of them at the back of a wardrobe and tried to hide the cold ones behind the salad...

Impressive stuff, bear.

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 15:02:52

Thanks Euro, but probably obsessive is more like it. grin It helps take my mind off Ttc. A bit.

I'm sure though that you'll easily shift the stone once you can exercise properly again Euro. How is your head bump now?

eurozammo Wed 24-Jul-13 15:25:31

removal=delivery. My mind was obviously elsewhere this morning!

Headbump is fine now, thanks. The scar is not too bad and I can hide it with my hair if I want to, although I am not really feeling the need to. I had my hair cut for the first time since I had it done yesterday and asked them not to pull too much! It was a little sore afterwards but not too bad (it is a few mm below the hairline).

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 16:01:03

<shuffles in>

Hello hags. How are we all?

Anyone else finding wall to wall royalbaybeehysteria quite extraordinarily painful?

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 16:02:57

That sounds promising. Hopefully you'll be back to your old self again soon.

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 16:03:59

Yes, Hest. I'm with you.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 16:06:54

Yes, Hest. But consoling myself in the knowledge that there have been back to back BESH mascots on Top Gear! The last two weeks have had The Batch and Huge Ackman - brilliant and lovely, both of them smile

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 16:11:27

Huge? And I missed him?

<rushes off to iPlayer>

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 16:15:19

He was wonderful <swoon> He is just such a nice man. I was all smiley and gushing about he lovely he is, and HOTB said "yeah, he is", too, so it's not just me fangirling, it's ACTUALLY TRUE grin

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 16:15:30

I despise Top Gear <ducks to avoid fish carcasses being thrown> but I would have thoroughly enjoyed Huge and The Batch!

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 16:18:17

Draf - GS thinks he's great too after seeing him on Graham Norton and after I told him about Huge and his wife's Ttc probs. He's an all round winner in the Bear household.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 16:19:02

I love the interviews on Top Gear generally, the massive A-listers always seem so pleasantly surprised by the irreverence and lightheartedness of it all. Huge is no exception - it's all very funny grin

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 16:22:15

<kneecaps Bear with a turbot>

I'll not hear a bad word said about Top Gear <stern>

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 16:36:56

Unjust! Unjust! I can't help hating Clarkson and I like cars, but hate talking about them.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 17:08:14

This week it was not so much talking about cars as dicking about with hovercraft. I love their insane challenges - it's the same (similar, anyway) reason I like scrapheap challenge. I just want to join in, with James' methodical planning, and Richard's cheerful optimism, and Clarkson's gloriously enthusiastic (and rather pigheaded) application of maximum power to any and all situations. It's like they're me grin

Bearfacedchic Wed 24-Jul-13 17:18:14

But you're lovely, Draf despite the kneecap incident Clarkson is not. The others are fine. Ah well, each to their own.

Had another klaxon horn instadiffer moment on evil FB. Why can someone who already has two kids be preggo with another one? When's it my turn? When's it a BESH's turn? < hangs head in shame at having jealous thoughts>

OhBuggerMe Wed 24-Jul-13 18:41:56

I find Bach a bit weird looking.

<dons body armour>

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 18:49:42

Bach??? Must be the funny seventeenth century wig I reckon <nods sagely>

I despise Clarkson. That a man of such intelligence should choose to be so pig ignorant and offensive, well, it makes my blood boil. May is ok <magnanimous>

OhBuggerMe Wed 24-Jul-13 19:59:35

Batch even! You know who I mean, yes him,the weird one.

<glares at those insulting The Batch>

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 20:33:10

Old Plasticine Face?

<throws mouldy prawns>

Nokkie73 Wed 24-Jul-13 20:44:20

Fight fight fight.

How are we all ? I am VERY bored. There is fuck all on the moving wireless and I cannot be fagged to read.

In other news, does anyone else think that awful Katie Pig in Knickers from the Apprentice should be shot in the face ?

Oh, and Huge is the highest paid Hollywood star this year. He has a big old packet alright.

If you're into your history Noks there is a documentary on BBC2 at 9pm about Elizabeth Woodville, Margaret Beaufort and Anne Neville. I saw the first part last week and it was very interesting - poor old Margaret Beaufort had her son (later Henry VII) aged just 13 shock

Nokkie73 Wed 24-Jul-13 20:53:11

I Sky+'ed the first part and was going to watch it after the White Queen has finished. I love a bit of history, me, but don't know a great deal about the Plantaganets so it should be good.

Has anyone been watching the White Queen. Wtf are Saints Knees ?!!

I have been watching it Nokks, not terribly accurate in places but good fun nonetheless!

I think having "saint's knees" means she prays a lot. I'm guessing, but from my understanding Margaret Beaufort was utterly devout, bordering on fanatical, so she would have seen her faith as a big selling point in the marriage stakes.

OhBuggerMe Wed 24-Jul-13 21:00:42

I'm watching The Zoo. I've never been the London Zoo. I heart animals and now want a baby tapier (sp?)

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 21:33:47

The White Queen is the worst drivel I have ever seen! This was the best line, in the second episode: "It's Warwick! He's kingmaking again!"

I may have to watch the documentary about the queens on iPlayer. I always felt very sorry for Anne Neville sad

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 21:38:02

Margaret Beaufort was nails.

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 21:38:42

As well as being a very serious scholar, unusual for a woman at that time.

JethroTull Wed 24-Jul-13 21:40:14

Hello BESH. Just popping in to say hello. TV at the mo is rubbish. <leaves gin & fish>

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 21:45:53


And so on. Miss you Jeffers x

Hest it as been very good - I've recorded tonight's episode as I was too tired to watch it properly. It is presented by Philippa Gregory, but has lots of historical scholars commenting on the three women and events around them.

HWHNN's mum hates PG with a passion. She didn't mind The Other Boleyn Girl too much, but really took against her over her Catherine of Aragon book which made out she had consummated her marriage to Arthur and lied about it to marry Henry.

HesterShaw Wed 24-Jul-13 22:03:40

God I love history! I did history at university and the Wars of the Roses was my specialism. I was obsessed.

eurozammo Wed 24-Jul-13 22:05:50

draf I caught a repeat of the legendary caravanning episode at the weekend. Flipping hilarious. I wish Clarkson was my embarrassing uncle.

I know nothing about history. My school (state grammar) was generally bloody good, but the history teaching was appalling and I dropped it ASAP. Consequently, it is a huge and occasionally shameful lacuna in my educayshun.

I have been out tonight, drinking WINE. It was a work thing. We ended up having dinner at Bread Street Kitchen (Ramsey place in the City). Lovely food but they needed to chill the rosé a bit more.

I loved history at school. I've always said if I do an OU degree it would be history based. HWHNN's mum is ver clever (ex-English teacher) and knows lots of interesting historical stuff, particularly Tudor/Elizabethan. She is in her 70s but teaches Shakespeare to fellow oldies at her local University of the Third Age grin

OhBuggerMe Wed 24-Jul-13 22:31:33

Another one here who knows naf all about history. I did gcse R.E and can tell you lots about Islam!!

JethroTull Wed 24-Jul-13 22:31:36

Frank University of the Third Age sounds great! I'd like to do an English Literature or Theatre Studies degree & specialise in Shakespeare. One day.

Euro Bread Street is good isn't it? We took some clients there a couple of weeks ago.

JethroTull Wed 24-Jul-13 22:32:23

<gropes Hest whilst no-one is looking>

CaptainMoll Wed 24-Jul-13 22:44:01

I just went to see A Field in England which is a strange and beautiful and artily pretentious film about the civil war. Or some blokes being weird in a field whilst the civil war is happening on the other side of the hedge.
I like history too. The White Queen is offensively shit and makes my feminist hackles rise.

I will watch the documentary instead.

I am sick of the royal baby. Or Raby, as I like to call it. him it .

That is all.

<lobs cods>

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:02:02

I like history, but it's rather in one ear out the other most of the time. Fascinating at the time I'm reading/watching, though.

Euro, that episode is superb, though the $100 dollar car American road trip one is still my favourite grin

HOTB and I have been playing our brand new board game tonight. We were playing the easy version and still took ages to have a clue how to play. Really good once we got going, though, and it has the most adorable animal-shaped pieces smile

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:03:38

<claws out eyes>

I meant $100 OR 100 dollar, of course. Not $100 dollar. <begs forgiveness>

blush blush blush

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:13:00

Is it wrong that the two world wars are my favourite historical period? It's all so fascinating and horrifying, the politics and the way people lived (and died). Maybe it's a product of reading books like The Machine-Gunners, When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit, and The Diary of Anne Frank during my formative years. And many many more films and books since then too.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:15:18

If you want good historical fiction, try Lindsey Davis' Falco books. They're Ancient Roman whodunnits, and very good. Also quite funny, and Falco himself is rather charming smile

CaptainMoll Wed 24-Jul-13 23:18:38

Draff - BE is reading one of those right now! My mum was really into them and bought him a big heap of them for Christmas. They are good, and funny.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:21:24

My nan recommended them to my mum, who lent one to me. I'm hopelessly behind, but I've read probably the first eight books or so. Also, Lindsey Davis is super nice - I emailed her several years ago to say we liked them, and got a very grateful and rather chuffed reply smile

Glad they are enjoyed by fellow BESH and associated family!

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Jul-13 23:23:12

My favourite moments are the turbot and the shield (made me nearly die laughing, I couldn't breathe) and the tired bee (just adorable). I really should borrow them from my mum and reread them.

KeepTheFaithBaby Thu 25-Jul-13 07:50:58

My Dad goes to his local U3A. Last week he went on a coach trip with them to Northumberland which included a visit in Vindalanda. He left school at 16 with only a few qualifications so its been really interesting for him.

I am always lurking smile that sounds a bit stalker-ish and rooting for you.

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Jul-13 08:31:47

Morning HistoryHags, how are you all this morning? I must confess I'm not that interested in history. I know that makes me an ignorant philistine, but there it is.

Turns out being holed up in a cottage in the Welsh countryside with no phone, internet, newsagents or tv made avoiding RoyalBaybeeFever easy to avoid. Yay!

OhBuggerMe Thu 25-Jul-13 10:00:43

Morning all.

Working from home today and really can't be bothered.

Got another flashing smiley this morning. I always get excited when a stick does anything!

eurozammo Thu 25-Jul-13 10:26:01

I am TIRED after my night out last night. I can't hack the pace any more, clearly.

I started temping again yesterday (after a break over IVF and hollibobs) and my temp shot up quite a bit this morning. You can't tell much from 2 temps, but it is very unusual for me to get one that high pre-ov. But I haven't felt ov, so it is all a bit odd. Oh well. Whatever my body is doing, it's fine. <witters>

evilgiraffe Thu 25-Jul-13 10:34:27

Drucks have arrived, and are in the fridge. All the other bits are in a cardboard box sitting on the armchair. IT'S LOOKING AT ME.

OhBuggerMe Thu 25-Jul-13 10:37:00

Hide it draf. When do you start stabbing?

Maybe we need a roll call?

evilgiraffe Thu 25-Jul-13 10:42:50

No idea, bugs, we've not had the stabbing schedule letter yet. That's due by tomorrow, though, so there's still time.

Tomorrow we have to take the cat to the vet to have a tooth removed (general anaesthetic! Poor kitty sad ), so it feels like everything is happening at once.

eurozammo Thu 25-Jul-13 12:04:59

Hide it, draf, hide it.

bugs I'm about 2 weeks away from the start of IVF#3. Bleugh.

OhBuggerMe Thu 25-Jul-13 12:13:16

That's even more of a mindfuck draf having them before you get your head around when you'll need them.

Are you another private natural cycle euro? You know the nhs probably owes you a few bob! grin

Bearfacedchic Thu 25-Jul-13 17:20:58

Hello! I'm back from my first referral appointment.

Well, as predicted we went through our histories (although we'd both thought doc could have been more thorough with this e.g. he didn't even ask how often we have sex!) Then DH had his varicocele looked at and then I had internal swabs done for chlamydia and other unknown stuff they check, apparently. Was glad of the foof advice, so thanks for the warnings everyone. Then doc disappeared for ages to talk to consultant and came back saying we needed to redo blood and SA tests and I have to go for an HSG. At first doc wanted to refer us for IVF there and then, but even I could have told him that procedure is to do investigations first! Tbh he didn't seem that experienced at it, although he did his best. Got another update appointment following the tests for November, which is only 3 months away.

Poor DH said he felt like a spare part even though he was the reason we were referred. We had to go to Gynaecology and a Women's Clinic. They took all my vitals like blood pressure but not his, although they did take his history. The whole thing is just stupid how the assumption is always that the problem is with the woman. We should be treated as a couple together. But I've said that before. Even when we left there didn't seem to be any mention if treatment for his varicocele. All very odd.

Oh yes and in the waiting room they had on BBC's Doctors with a man going on a rant at a pregnant woman and finishing by saying she could end up with a dead baby. I was horrified that this was on in the waiting room of a Women's Clinic!

Well, that's everything for now I think, so none the wiser but shuffling forwards in the system it would seem.

Sorry this message is rather like another I posted on another Fred but I couldn't be arsed to type it again.

Btw I really enjoyed History at school, but don't use it much now. Any good book recommendations are more than welcome. Might check out the bits you've posted about already.

eurozammo Thu 25-Jul-13 17:58:51

Yep, bugs. We said at the start of the year we would throw 10k at this, and three natural cycles will come to around that. I'm not sure what we will do if this one doesn't work. Take some time off and think about our options I guess.

bear the focus on the woman is just daft, particularly when there is a known MF ishoo. KFZK's SAs have all hovered around the low end of normal for most measures and they get glanced at before the drs go back to prodding and poking me, even though everything has been normal for me (barring one NK cell measure)! It's annoying.

I've just had an announcement - my best friend's little brother. It now seems like I am being overtaken by the next generation (well not quite the next generation, but you know what I mean). <sigh>

FizzyFeet Thu 25-Jul-13 20:43:06

Evening all.

draf pretty cool to have got your drugs! Though a headfuck while you're waiting. I'm deeply envious - still feel a bit trapped in a very slow moving system. It's obvious that I need ivf so why don't they just give me the drucks now! <stamps foot> I did however get an appointment through today in a couple of weeks so they can fill in ANOTHER form I would be seriously considering going private if it didn't invalidate my one NHS go.

bear glad things are moving for you. I agree about the absurdity of poking just the wimminz. More poking o men, say I!

RaspberrySnowCone Thu 25-Jul-13 21:43:02

draf has drugs! Just ignore them until stabbing starts. Hope the cat tooth removal goes ok. Poor pussy sad

Bugs I used to get excited by the third egg on CBFM. I used the cheapy sticks for a while and they weren't half as exciting.

Sorry your Dr seemed a bit of a plonker Bear, the focus is always on the woman, if ever I've suggested it might be the man I just get blank looks although in our case it looks like it might be a bit of both. I've not told anyone we are having ICSI, just to protect MATV but I don't think he's that bothered.

BESHes I am bloated, farty, poopy <chatty> and knackered. I have a slight hangover after drinking too much cider with my friend and we also had dinner out and consequently I stank of garlic all day today. So lunch time I went for a walk and my blummin flipflop broke angry. I had to get my friend to pick me up! damn thing. Droid is due over the weekend just as we go on hols but at least then we can get booked in for drug collection then we start stabbing at start of next cycle so I'm probably about 5/6 weeks away from starting proper :/ <<<<SCARED>>>>

Hello hags, hurrah and also eek for druck arrivals. I used to hide mine in the spare fridge in our garage until I actually needed them. Very much the "fingers in ears la la la I'm not listening" school of thought.

Hope everyone is keeping well and drinking lots of gin based cocktails in the sunshine grin

eurozammo Thu 25-Jul-13 22:15:25

I love that so many of us are embracing the head-in-the-sand approach to IVF. I wholeheartedly approve. In fact, I fancy myself a pioneer. <proud>

I'm probably oving. I think I'm too hot to shag... <shrug>

HesterShaw Thu 25-Jul-13 22:24:42

I'm putting my head in the sand about ALL of it grin

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 00:07:09

Yay for the drucks!

Funny you should say that about head in the sand. Both GS and I were chatting in the pub because you have to ho to the pub after these things; it's either that of cake and we both said it felt surreal and like it was happening to someone else. I'm guessing this is somewhat normal?

That's shit that the wimmin are the focus of investigations. How backward. I was hoping I'd just had a dud doctor but from what you folks are saying it sounds like the norm. Crap.

Head in sand is good for me too. Tbh I'd put my whole body in if I didn't think work would miss me. grin

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 26-Jul-13 06:10:33

Yup, ill happily stick my head in the sand!

OhBuggerMe Fri 26-Jul-13 08:34:55

I'm not at head in sand stage yet as I've foolishly told myself I'll be pregnant naturally before our turn for IVF comes up!!

I got peak fertility this morning on the cb opk <proud>

Anybody heard from Driz?

OhBuggerMe Fri 26-Jul-13 08:52:59

Not on here for a couple of days but she's been around on t'other place.

Ah ok, as long as you've heard from her (let her know my legs and arms and fingers and toes are crossed)

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Jul-13 09:14:58

Yeah, all our doctors have focussed on me, too. However, it turns out there's nothing wrong with him, and I have severe endo, so I suppose they were right... At least it completely vindicated my opinion from early TTC: "stats say 99% of healthy couples our age get diffed within a year; therefore there must be something wrong". Two and a half years after that point, I was proved right, there was indeed something very wrong. Shame no-one was interested in finding out earlier, really.

I may be bucking the trend, head-in-sand wise. I want to know everything ASAP, so I can deal with it - it's having to wait (for tests, appointments, decisions, deliveries, etc) that gets me more than anything else.

HesterShaw Fri 26-Jul-13 09:50:12

I'm just pissed off with being told everything is "normal"and still not getting pregnant. Normal progesterone, exemplary uterus, clear tubes, cyst free ovaries, low AMH admittedly but a good responder to Drucks, great spermz.....still not pregnant.

eurozammo Fri 26-Jul-13 09:54:35

Well done bugs! Nice LHing.

draf the waiting is the hardest part. So much of ttc is waiting - waiting to ov, waiting for Droid, waiting for appointments, waiting for results. Grrrr.

HesterShaw Fri 26-Jul-13 09:59:48

We should compose a song called The Eternal Wait of the Barren.

OhBuggerMe Fri 26-Jul-13 10:20:01

Since I couldn't hold a note in a bucket I'll play the triangle in the background. grin

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Jul-13 10:40:36

<ting> Nice work, bugs grin

It's ludicrous, Hest. It really pissed me off, being told we were normal - clearly not, or we'd be parents by now! I want to go back in time and tell my GP and various other doctors: SEE, I TOLD YOU THERE WAS A REASON I WAS BARREN. There is always a reason, they just don't like to bother looking for one until you've been trying (waiting) for years, and not necessarily even then. Which also annoys me - fertility is age-dependent, so why the fuck do they wait years before even starting to help? angry Granted, we could have gone private earlier, but the cost would have been astronomical, as well as daft considering we get three cycles on the NHS.

Post has been, no stabbing schedule letter hmm Maybe tomorrow. On the plus side, my pretty Japanese fan arrived, so now I have a chance of keeping cool without just wafting bits of paper around.

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 10:59:50

I can't play anything except the recorder and that doesn't count but I can wail sing.

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Jul-13 11:05:00

I called the clinic (I ^hate> making phone calls). Letter is in the post, apparently, posted yesterday but goes via Edinburgh (?!?!) so hopefully will be here tomorrow/Monday.  However, the nice lady on the phone clearly had notes (or a copy of the sodding letter), and I am to go ahead and have the third zoladex on Tuesday, and start downreg stabbing on 19th August.  I'll have a downreg scan on 10th September ("day 21" from start of downregging), and hopefully start the gonal f on 11th September.

I'm rather sad that it's so within reach and we still have to wait a month before we can even start, and it'll be weeks after that before we find out if it has worked.  It all seems like such a long time, and it's been so long already.

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 11:06:24

Sorry to hear you are all swimming through the brown stuff to get where you want to be too. sad I was saying to GS last night that it feels a bit like the idea of a baybee is up on a cloud floating away and I'm just watching it slide off into the distance. Weirdly though, I think that's my way of coping with it. I'm not as sad about it as I was. I feel like if I expect the worst then I can only be surprised astonished and happy ecstatic if it does ever happen. I still have moments of anger and frustration though.

Yay on the peak fertility Bugs!

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 11:10:09

It'll soon be here draf. It sounds and undoubtedly feels like forever, but it really will be round soon. thanks You're nearly there.

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 11:18:28

Sorry I missed your post on being told you're 'normal' Draf and completely concur with everything you say. None of it makes any sense to me and there doesn't seem to be any logic applied when it comes to thinking about age and fertility.

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Jul-13 11:35:24

It's daft, isn't it? I'm grateful that we now have our reason - stage four endo is a pretty emphatic one, as they go - but so frustrated that it took so long for anyone to give a crap about finding out what was wrong. And they did actually stumble across the endo by accident, so not too many bonus points for finding it.

Incidentally, aside from the GP several years ago when we were first concerned, no-one has ever asked us about our sexual habits, so you are not alone in that one, bear!

And you are definitely right regarding going to the pub afterwards. We have generally always gone for tea and cake out, and then hit the bottle when we get home...

HesterShaw Fri 26-Jul-13 12:49:24

I don't even want to do the ivf i'n a weird way simply because we'll only get one shot at it. Once it fails, the sooner I have to start thinking about the rest of my life with no child. Negative, but that's how I'm looking at it at the moment.

JethroTull Fri 26-Jul-13 13:00:44

It was the endless waiting that drove me to my mini breakdown earlier last year. Not the lack of baby. Just the hopelessness of constantly waiting for that next appointment to be told to come back again 3 months later. Heads in the sand or finding out everything - both good strategies. Just do whatever makes you feel better about the whole shitty process.

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 26-Jul-13 14:45:56

So guess what was on the carpet waiting for me when I got home......the outcome of the investigation into my complaint as to how useful the woman at the funding office was - and guess what - they agreed that they were useless and apologise unreservedly and wholeheartedly for their shitness. Now I feel a bit flat because they actually used the words 'We no that at this stage this will be of no consolation given the stress this must have caused you......'.
Do you think I could sue them for the cost of a round of IVF? grin

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 26-Jul-13 23:06:03

blimey........where is everyone? <<<tumbleweed>>>

Bearfacedchic Fri 26-Jul-13 23:51:30

I'm around and have got myself a bit sunburnt today Rasp, but thread is eerily quiet. <owl twit twoos in distance> sorry I don't know the back story of your letter, but is it a good thing?

Draf- how horrible for you having to go through that. sadangry for you. Yes, cake is a must. As is alcohol for me. I can't believe no one has asked you about sex. Defies belief. It's the most basic thing, surely?! Or am I just bring stupid? Crazy.

Oh Hest . . . <strokes hair with starfish>

eurozammo Sat 27-Jul-13 11:17:25

No one has asked us about sex either. Maybe we have been doing it wrong or something?

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 12:15:31

We got asked about sex at our first appointment and I said around three times a week. He didn't really clarify which hole though so you never know, I could be getting this monumentally wrong!

Bearfacedchic Sat 27-Jul-13 12:39:11

I just thought they'd check that one is doing it enough blush

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 12:51:59

I would have thought it was a routine question. Some people can be clueless about fertility. Saying that perhaps they assume a GP might have gone through those sorts of things before the referral.

Bearfacedchic Sat 27-Jul-13 14:09:41

Yes, maybe Rasp.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 16:09:49

I am so tired I can barely move, clearly I am diffed. Or about to have the mother of all droids. Most likely the latter but am having a little menkul anyway.

Bearfacedchic Sat 27-Jul-13 16:18:30

Can I join you in the menkulling? I've just started bleeding mid-cycle and have no idea what it is. I've had it before and was told it meant an anovulatory cycle. It probably is. Bloody body.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 16:28:20

Of course, shall we hold virtual hands and menkul. I'm going to go and pee on an opk, just for fun, because I can.

Thank god it's raining, it's been unbearably sticking here this morning, which is probably the cause of tiredness, not ironidiffage.

Rasp an OPK is as bad as a fiver!

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Jul-13 16:41:19

When's your droid due rasp?

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 16:43:35

It was arctic. It's was an Internet cheapy. Droid due tomorrow and getting some wonderful womble cramps so guessing it will arrive either tomorrow or Monday.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 16:45:48

Just looked again, it's not completely arctic but if I was diffed it would have to be darker than the control line. sad

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Jul-13 17:21:42

Aw lovely. No good ever comes of testing early. Stock up on good dark chocolate for the next few days, and have a smelly bucket of cockles and mussels.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 17:44:56

Pizza and Rosè wine tonight! Off to York tomorrow for a few days in the camper. Droid has a cunning ability to know when I go on holiday so is bound to arrive first thing!!

OhBuggerMe Sat 27-Jul-13 17:59:33

Erm Rasp an opk won't get dark like a hpt, I've always found they take longer to darken. Can u not pop out for a proper test?

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 18:43:27

I'm not due til tomorrow/Monday I think so I'll leave it another day or two. I don't really think I'm diffed, I'm just tired and lazy smile

OhBuggerMe Sat 27-Jul-13 19:05:53

Fair enough. <gets foot ready to kick droid>

Rasp in my experience OPK is dark around 7 days post O if diffed and then v light (not arctic) when diffed. My OPKs only got dark again a week after my first BFP

eurozammo Sat 27-Jul-13 19:37:03

Interesting, rasp, interesting.

But in the meantime, pizza and rosé sounds brilliant.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 19:53:49

Hmmmm, well this is doing nothing to help my menkul but interesting all the same. Can't remember if I've ever pee'd on an OPK before as a HPT or not. Probably have, not much I haven't pee'd on over the yrs. I'm not pregnant, ironi diffs don't happen. They are mythical magic. I am not pregnant.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Jul-13 20:19:07

Does that mean I have to put away the kidney poking device? You might as well pee on a HTP now, you'll just drive yourself bananas menkulling otherwise.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Jul-13 20:19:28

*hpt, obviously

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 20:32:42

But it's wet outside and I'd have to go to tesco. Honestly, don't get excited, I'm sure my loyal droid will be here tomorrow.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Jul-13 20:43:13

Fair enough. Although I can't get my head round the concept of not having a stash of internet cheapies for just this sort of occasion. Enjoy the rosé.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 20:51:33

I used to! Always had some tesco two pks, this is the first month I've not had any.

<eyes up Rasp with interest>

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 21:01:04

The control line is/was thick and pink, the test line at 5mins was dark but thin. Make of that what you will. I'm not diffed I promise. Kick me in the kidneys all you like ladies. :D

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 27-Jul-13 21:06:05

I have researched, not uncommon to always get two lines wherever you are in a cycle.

Hest, I meant to ask you t'other night when we were discussing history stuff: when watching the Philippa Gregory documentary she said that she thought Margaret Beaufort was responsible for the deaths of the Princes in the Tower. Is that a common theory?

Rasp I have done numerous cycles (bfp and bfn) with OPKs taken on every day of the cycle. I have never had a 2nd line on an OPK post o if not diffed during any of my experiments. But that's just me. Will fuck off now and leave you to your wine in peace grin

CaptainMoll Sat 27-Jul-13 22:52:16

<eyes Rasps kidneys but resists poking them>

I just watched the new Wolverine movie. His Ackman really is Huge. Lots and lots of lingering torso shots. I highly recommend it to anyone wishing to disengage brain and have a good ogle.

evilgiraffe Sun 28-Jul-13 00:19:25

Well, who knows, rasp?! Wait and see smile

Sounds good, Moll! Is it a good film aside from the ogling opportunities? Origins Wolverine was dreadful; even the near-constant state of Huge undress didn't do much to redeem it.

CaptainMoll Sun 28-Jul-13 10:14:23

Draff to be honest, it's pretty silly. There is a great heroic female in it, but also a ton of ridiculous ninjas. If I was Japanese I would be totally rolling my eyes at the outrageous stereotyping.

I was definitely in the market for mindless entertainment last night so it ticked that box, but it's very little else.

Bearfacedchic Sun 28-Jul-13 10:49:57

My opks only have control line after ov. Just saying . . .
Enjoy your holiday Rasp.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Jul-13 15:47:23

Hello hags! I've just read back and am keeping everything crossed for OPK-lines (although mine a couple of months ago was nothing, but a huge headfuck, sorry!)

As to head in the sand approach to IVF, I am in. I think of euro as my secret hormonal twin. I can confirm now that I am glad we stuck it out including the bloody DRing, as I got a letter just now (coming back from a weekend at my only RL-IVF friend) telling me we got 6 frosties! shock It means there will be no more DRing for a year at least smile No other news, OTD on Thursday, and huge progesterone symptoms, but I had them before ET... My head will go back into the sand, after a little googling about frosties!

Sorry about the endless wait, btw. Draf the drucks do disappear quickly and August will be here before you know it!

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 17:58:37

Afternoon hags. I have been without signal for a couple of days as I've been away enjoying a couple of lovely walks in the dales.

GP is currently asleep on the sofa whilst I do washing. Charming smile

Driz any more spotting? How do you test - piss stick or blood test?

Ooo, well done on the frosties Drizz. When is test day?

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 28-Jul-13 18:16:21

Head is FIRMLY in sand. No droid as yet but have hip ache, sore boobs and a horny husband. Droid will therefore arrive tomorrow. Everything crossed for driz though!

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 18:55:12

rasp when Will you poaf?

[eyes Rasp suspiciously] can you not try another OPK? [innocent face]

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Jul-13 19:02:35

I'd love to do some twirling with my progesterone-enhanced boobs, so get thee to a 24-hour supermarket and PISS, rasp.

As a special deal, I get both blood and piss (they're considering moving from one to the other) at the clinic on Thursday, preceded by a home test, so SB and I find out together... Unless of course I start to bleed properly. Spotting has dried up and I am farting like a man, so really attractive. But I don't think that's surprising considering the amount of progesterone I am shuffing up my foof. Not saying anything about the drizzlecake induced sickness, yesterday.

<retrieves kidney poking stick from umbrella stand>

[keeps on eye suspiciously trained on Rasp and swivels other to Driz]
Don't disregard farting as a symptom so easily....

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Jul-13 19:14:56

Well, since my short-lived diffness last year, I've had post-OV farting every month. I think the hcg broke my digestion... <chatty>

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 19:32:16

<Gets ready to crack seal on brand spanking new pair of nipple tassles>

I did not just scroll back for ages through the fred on my phone to figure out Lembie dates, no, 'twas not me

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 19:57:40

ok I need fish slaps <lines up>

As we're using cb opks this.month and had the sechs day before, day of and day after ovulation I'm starting ti convince myself I'll get a bfp in 2 weeks. Please talk some fecking sense in to me. I need brutal honesty!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Jul-13 20:03:17

I was going to stay away from MN for a bit again. But...

<strides in with a basket full of cockles and pelts them at bugs>

You'll see in two weeks, no sooner, no later. It might happen, but more likely it won't. Tis like that even for the fertile <stern face>

Merk you should just have asked! In case anyone else would be tempted to wade through: EC 17/7, ET 20/7, OTD 1/8.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Jul-13 20:04:41

Week of suicidal DRing plus pill 20/6-26/6. Never again... Or not for a very long time

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 28-Jul-13 20:07:11

<smacks bugs with the sturgeon of sense>
Bugs you know a fertile couple shagging at the right time has about a 1 in 6 chance of diffment. Keep busy the next two weeks.

<readies boxing gloves to punch rasp then later on driz in the kidneys>

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 20:07:47

GP is going to hide all tests and I'll test on 9th August.

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 28-Jul-13 20:08:18

Oh and hooray for the frosties driz, excellent work, no more DRing for you. You did well to stick with it.

eurozammo Sun 28-Jul-13 20:09:08

I'm farty all month long <extra chatty>

merkin is a swivel-eyed loon!

drizz 6 frosties and OTD soon. <excited>

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 28-Jul-13 20:09:11

bugs I can see you tearing the house apart to find them on the 7th...

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 28-Jul-13 20:10:00

I was never farty until they stole my gallbladder <joins in with the chat>

JethroTull Sun 28-Jul-13 21:01:46

<says nothing but marks various symptoms on spreadsheet & starts limbering up for some nekkid dancing>

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 28-Jul-13 21:53:20

I fart like a man all year round, tis no biggy. I also had heart burn earlier after my mcDonalds. I refuse to POAS. In fact, head shall remain in sand until at least Thursday as that would be the longest cycle EVER. Stop exciting me. Or I'll pee on the floor like an over excited terrier. CD 36 over and done with. MATV has sent me to bed as I've been asleep for an hr after a hearty argument about dolphins in captivity. Night all!

[adds sand to Rasps big pile] wink

OhBuggerMe Sun 28-Jul-13 22:04:31

<gets out bucket & spade>

Ooooh look at my pretty sandcastle grin

On a side note, talking about over excited terriers, my friend at school had one that used to get excited, roll on its back and pee with excitement directly into its own open mouth grinconfused

evilgiraffe Sun 28-Jul-13 22:22:23

Speaking of captive marine mammals, everyone go see Blackfish. It's a superb documentary film about killer whales in captivity (SeaWorld in particular), and associated deaths of people. Really fascinating and very distressing if you have even the smallest amount of empathy for an animal.

Bugs, you won't know for two weeks, if not longer. Do not engage the menkul just yet! <prods with a pike>

Excellent frosty news, driz! Still got fingers crossed for Lembie smile

I have always had a shitty (LOL) digestive system, but I think last summer's stress overload broke me. I fart all the time and have sudden digestive failures more often than is entirely usual. It's rubbish.

eurochick Sun 28-Jul-13 22:49:16

We used to have a retriever. Once, when I was an easily embarrass-able teen, I had some friends round. The dog got excited at all the new people, rolled onto her back and created a wee fountain in the living room. <teen cringe>

Bearfacedchic Sun 28-Jul-13 23:57:10

grin Merk and Euro.

At school one of my friends had a chihuahua whose knob was so big it sometimes dragged on the ground. He had to go to the vet and get it seen to.

I can produce deadly man farts if I've eaten the right food, otherwise I just have to wait til droid to compete with beat GS.

Frosties sound good Drizz! Well done.

Draf- I will save Blackfish for a time when I really need a good blart. Sounds good though.

<adds some shells to Bugs' sandcastle>

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 08:32:26

Still no droid, just a very grumbly womble. Ill get a test today, if nothing else that should at least ensure it actually turns up so I can get drucks appt and next scan booked in. Bloody droid.

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 08:35:28

I think that's the best idea rasp. I'll lurk today.

<Sticks test stick in top of Rasp's sandcastle as makeshift flag>

Rasp - when is droid due? You now have me singing to Wombles of Wimbledon Common to myself....

Sechs hounds, ultrasounds, womble HSG
The wombles of BESHledon common are we
Menkulling daily, we're out of our mind
Peeing on fivers when we are inclined

yes i am bored

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 09:05:46

merk I dare & beg you to write the full song!

Oh i love a challenge! Although, having just listened to it on youtube the second verse about uncle bulgaria i have never heard in my life before! Dashes off to try and find something to rhyme with drucks

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 10:00:09

Yesterday :/ but that depends on whether I ov'd when I think I did. On CD37 today which is quite a long one for me but I have had a few 40 dayers in the last two yrs.

Presenting... <drum roll> The Wombles of BESHledon Common

If you want to sing along the music can be found here
and if you can make it scan you deserve a medal

Sechs hounds, ultrasounds, womble HSG
The wombles of BESHledon common are we
Menkulling daily, we're out of our mind
Peeing on fivers when we are inclined

Aunty OhBuggerMe, she can remember the days when she had some other passtimes
With her nipple tassles, Pick up referral and take it to somebody

The BESH stick together they work as a team
Helping each other with a stabbing regime
Sechs hounds, ultrasounds, womble HSG
The wombles of BESHledon common are we

Doing all we can to win a baybee
Waiting in for a drucks de-liv-e-ry
We menkul by night and we menkul by day
Stare at another arctic OPK

We're so incredibly, utterly selfish hags, leaving it late to start mating, always knicker checking
Pick up the pieces and, if droid comes then start anew, Is what we do!

Sechs hounds, ultrasounds, womble HSG
The wombles of BESHledon common are we
Stroking the halibut, out of our minds,
Checking the paint chart time after time

Rasp my eyebrow is raised so far it has disappeared into my ponytail wink

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 10:32:52

LOVE the song merk, though I may have the tune stuck in my head for the rest of the day.

rasp you are being very patient, or else you have built a most excellent sand castle to hide in.

alwyn Mon 29-Jul-13 10:45:42

I think rasp's sand castle is so elaborate it has turrets and a moat.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 10:45:50

Nice work merk.

rasp do you not find the sand is getting in your eyes down there?

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 10:51:29

She's not answering because the sand is so much in her eyes she can't read our posts. al does it have little sand knights, and sand stables for the horses?

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 11:09:03

Bravo Merk! <applauds vehemently>

Rasp? <calls up the moat>

<rapturous applause for Merks>

That should be the BESH Anthem grin

<gently pokes Rasp>

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 11:24:12

<Echo comes back down moat>

Yes- definitely the BESH anthem.(I love that BESH is in my predictive text now and I never put it in myself. It really is a smart phone!)

Has anyone been watching The Returned? What did you think of the final episode last night and what do you make I'd it all?

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 11:24:51

I'd =of

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 11:38:36

No spoilers please! I haven't watched it yet (not just last night's episode, any of it - it's going to be our next box set).

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 11:39:55

Oops- ok. End of convo then <shortlived> otherwise we will spoil for you.

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 11:40:36

FWIW I really enjoyed it.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 11:42:26

Thx, bear. I have been avoided all Returned threads on here.

We always miss stuff when it's on TV and end up catching up later. I actually prefer stuff that way. One episode a week doesn't do it for me if it's something I'm really enjoying. I prefer to get through the whole series in a week.

<Floats tiny boat with supply of tests down Rasp's moat>

Although suspects Rasp's moat is probably full off pee so backs off

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 11:52:06

MERK that is EPIC!!!

grin grin grin grin grin grin grin

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 12:02:14

Same Euro. I hate having to wait a week. I loved the cinematography though. I signed up to my GCSE French course at the weekend so of course I was trying to listen to everything they said!

grin Merk

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 12:02:18

Hags I had a scan just now. Empty sac, no embryo. No baybee for me.

Twinks I am so, so sorry sad <hugs>

Bearfacedchic Mon 29-Jul-13 12:19:05

Oh Twink. sad I'm so sorry.

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Jul-13 12:19:40

Oh, Twink sad I'm so very sorry to hear that. <hugs you gently>

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 12:31:41

Oh Winks <passes cod of comfort>

Take some time and look after yourself. We're here for you thanks

Twink there aren't any words. So sorry. Sending you all the wine, chocolates, ice cream & tissues in the world x

KeepTheFaithBaby Mon 29-Jul-13 12:40:43

I am so sorry Twinks.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Jul-13 12:46:03

Oh my God, Twinks I'm so very, very sorry, I can't tell you.

This is too cruel sad

alwyn Mon 29-Jul-13 12:54:14

Oh Twink, I'm so very sorry. Sending gin and tissues.

FriendofDorothy Mon 29-Jul-13 13:15:39

Oh Twink I am so,so sorry sad

CaptainMoll Mon 29-Jul-13 13:40:21

Twinks handholds, huddles, all of it. So sorry.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 13:40:53

The Universe can just fvk off. The BESH deserve a break. This is too much. <shakes fist angrily>

I'm so sorry Twinks.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 14:25:28

You're all luffly x

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 14:34:39

This might be too soon, so tell me to feck off if it is, but when I had a similar experience, I realised that I had no idea what happened next and no one really explained things to me as my scan was at my fertility clinic rather than an EPU, so they weren't really set up for it. So if you want to talk about that I'm happy to relate my experiences on here or over PM. And I found the mc board on here (under body and soul) very informative and supportive.


<passes gin>

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 14:38:21

Another one here to offer practical advice if you need it.


TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 14:38:22

Fanks euro. I had the scan at a private clinic. The doctor told me some stuff but I didn't really manage to listen properly. I'm going to the epu tomorrow. I stopped in tesco to buy maxi sanitary towels and throw away giant pants. I'm hoping the bleeding starts by itself. How long did yours last and how much did it hurt?

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 14:38:54

Cross posts, thanks bugs as well.

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 14:41:51

Sorry x-posts

The bleeding for both my mc's lasted 1-2 weeks and at the start were so heavy it poured out of me. I found co-codamol my saviour and just sat in the bath whilst the worst of it passed.

For the first part of it I also ate.crap and relied on box sets. Another tip was to wear 2 pairs of knickers to make you feel 'secure'.

I would suggest that as soon as the bleeding starts you cancel all plans and stay at home.

I'm so so so sorry you're going through this. The mc boards are fantastic for advice.

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 14:55:15

Twink I'm so sorry.

Sorry to also keep you in suspense, I've been at a railway museum this morning but I've produced a rather arctic stick this afternoon. Back on the wine for me tomorrow.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 14:57:09

Mine played out like this (of course each mc is different, but it might give you some idea)

Monday - spotting
Tuesday - bleeding similar to early period
Wednesday - quite a lot of pain - needed codeine for the first time ever. Made it to acu in the morning but really should have stayed in bed, spent the rest of the day in bed watching telly, passed quite a lot of clotty stuff but nothing I couldn't deal with at home. BTW, I was expecting the pain to come in waves like period cramps/contractions but mine was constant dull pain, so I didn't think it was the worst of it.
Thursday - passed what I think was the sac, had more clots but felt ok enough to be back in work (it was a crazy busy time so I needed to be there if I could). Pain eased quite a bit.
Friday-Saturday - fairly heavy clotty bleeding but not too painful.
Sunday - bleeding eased a bit and I managed a long haul flight for work, but was quite weak - I really struggled to lift my case on to the belt at the check in desk and after the flight I was pretty spent.

I bled for about 2 weeks in total and was thoroughly fed up with it by the end.

It was crap but not physically as bad as I had feared. There are some horror stories out there about the blood and pain, so undoubtedly some women have it worse, but it is not always that bad.

<hugs> I hope the Mr will look after you well.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Mon 29-Jul-13 16:47:04

So sorry twinks sad it is totally horrible.

My experience was a little different from both bugs and euro's so I'll add it. I had been spotting when we found out it was dead, continued spotting for a week, another scan confirmed it was definitely dead. That afternoon I was in loads of pain and in within half an hour produced the sack. My pain was bad enough that I could not find the painkillers right in front of me. The pain subsided a lot after passing the sac, but I was bleeding so much that I was wearing the fat pads and would not leave the house and toilet for two days. I passed the sac on Thursday, on Sunday I left the house again for the first time and on Monday it had subsided to periodlike stuff and I went into work again.

And it took me a real while and some decent fertility counselling to get anywhere near over the mc. So take your time to heal the psychological wounds as well, once you've come to the other end of the physical nastiness.

Holds out a hand, a cake and lots of gin.

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 16:55:32

I would agree that the physical stuff is easy to deal with compared to the mental stuff. I had 2 weeks off work the first time and 3 the second.

Both times the pain reduced considerably after the sac was passed.

Before my mc id read posts saying to look after yourself, now I know what they meant. No one and nothing else matters right now except you two.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 17:02:22

I definitely agree with that bugs. I felt like I wanted to soldier on at the time, but wallowing would probably have been better for me.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 17:08:02

Thank you for sharing, it's good to have some idea of what to expect. I just read some of the mc boards and someone said how there's always a pregnancy announcement straight away; I went onto Facebook and there it fucking was.

euro HWCA is great & will definitely look after me. We will look after each other.

Twink the best advice i was ever given was remember you don't have to be strong. I too am one of those soldiering on people, but i found that letting it all out really did help me recover from the big stuff better, otherwise i had a tendency to bottle it up.
Do you have any more appointments or anything you have to go to as a follow up?

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 17:53:19

I was scanned at a private clinic today. I will have to go to the epu tomorrow so they can, dunno, confirm the loss and have me taken off the midwives' list.

It really was wonderful being diffed sad

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 17:56:34

twink it is great, isn't it. I was so happy then.

We will both get there. <hands over cod of comfort, and wine>

HesterShaw Mon 29-Jul-13 18:03:42

This is so sad.

Why is life so shit sometimes?

FizzyFeet Mon 29-Jul-13 18:58:29

Twink I'm so so sorry. Can't add anything to the advice on the mc boards but am thinking of you and HWCA.

<shakes fist at universe>
No one deserves this but it does seem particularly brutal when it happens to a BESH.

Sorry for the arctic stick, too rasp. sad

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 21:18:56

This is all shit, it's shit. I've had too much to drink and have started spotting. What a fucking surprise. Why are we unable to make this happen, why is it so hard for us but just as easy as breathing for other people. I fucking hate this, I just want my life back. None of this is fair. None of it.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Jul-13 21:22:50

I know Rasp, I know. I know people say not to, but part of me feels ashamed and embarrassed by it. Women since the dawn of time have got pregnant, and I can't.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Jul-13 21:24:33

Sorry, pressed enter. I'm so sorry to hear about your spotting. It's so dreadful that even when a little part of you is thinking "This is it, it must be it!" and most of you is going "Don't be daft"....and then the dreaded spotting starts and you feel so sad and stupid. Well I do.

CaptainMoll Mon 29-Jul-13 21:24:44

Just here, just thinking of you all.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Jul-13 21:25:23

It is shit rasp, it's utter bollocks and I'm sorry about your arctic stick and spotting. Come share the Cod of Comfort with me, and make sure you drink a pint of water before bed.

eurochick Mon 29-Jul-13 21:26:17

I'm sorry about the arctic stick and the spotting, rasp.

This is just shit shit shit. Universe, I have had ENOUGH. Do you hear me? Don't make me come out there, because I am ANGRY. Harrumph.

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 21:34:20

I feel embarrassed to Hest, i do. I know I shouldn't but women are designed to have babies. If I cant do that, what's the point of me? To make it worse, I had a rant about my shitty chocolate (see reference in t'other place), threw it on the table in a temper. It flew and hit the stem of my classy plastic camping glass containing rose wine which went flying EVERYWHERE including in my eye. Rose ducking stings. Really stings. I feel like using lots of swear words tonight, on behalf of all of us.

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 21:35:55

Fucking, it fucking stings. Bloody auto correct. What's a duck got to do with all this.

OhBuggerMe Mon 29-Jul-13 21:44:17

I'll join in the swearing. Cunt cunt CUUUUUNNNNNNNNNT.

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Jul-13 21:50:02

Cunt twatting fuck bollocks. Is there a word worse than cunt? If there is, I will use.

Bearfacedchic Tue 30-Jul-13 00:11:57

There really aren't any words and it sounds so lame to say I'm sorry for you Twink and I'm sorry for the arctic stick and spotting Rasp, but I am. I wish I could do something to change it for you both. Hell, for you all.

I just don't understand it. None of it.

Someone put up a post elsewhere a day or two ago related to ttc and sub-fertility part of which said 'who said life's ever fair?' And I nearly blew a gasket despite all the other positive things the poster wrote. So I didn't reply. As apparently it isn't good to be bitter. hmm

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Jul-13 06:55:19

I'm getting very ahead of myself but - before this, I was due to have a HSG then start clomid. What's likely to happen with that now?

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Jul-13 07:26:14

No idea Twink, they may want you to leave it a couple of months perhaps before going on for treatment?

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 07:39:48

They may still give you clomid (as they did me despite ovulating myself) but you might not need the hsg.

Hope you get some answers at the EPU

rasp sorry for the bfn. I feel slightly responsible for getting your hopes up.

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Jul-13 07:45:58

I got my hopes up all by myself don't worry smile
I hate these slightly extended cycles, I clearly have no grasp on when I ovulate nowadays. I have lots of sticks left, for this last cycle I may just use them, just for the hell of it!

How are you feeling today anyway Twink?

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Jul-13 07:52:43

Pretty damn shitty rasp, I had a horrible night's sleep, and gave up around 5.30, when I just lay there thinking "this time yesterday I was having a baby." I have no idea when the bleeding will start either, and HWCA and I have a lovely trip to York booked for next week for my birthday present. Don't know if I'll be able to go. I don't know how I can go back to work tomorrow either, I'm crying at everything.

Can you go to the doctor and get yourself signed off for a week or two, r longer? Take care of yourself Twinks.

SinkyMalinks Tue 30-Jul-13 08:01:59

Twink. Do you need to go back tomorrow? Seriously. Was is the wise Euro up fred who said look after yourself first? The world will not crash down if you hide/get wasted/opt out of public life for a bit.

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 08:28:04

wink do not goto work. Tell your boss you're having a mc and self cert for a week whilst you await a sick note. The EPU can arrange one for you.

They may offer a d&c at your appointment or tablets. I've had neither but from what I've read id choose a d&c.

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 08:30:48

Also re York. I found that anything I had to cancel was easy to do so once I explained why. I missed my graduation and got a full refund for all my gown hire etc despite the strict no refund policy. York can wait. In a couple if days give the hotel a ring and postpone it.

KeepTheFaithBaby Tue 30-Jul-13 09:06:14

Twinks do not go to work. You should be at home watching box sets. The BESH have spoken. all meant kindly of course

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 09:15:18

I'm conscious my advice may come across as bit blunt. its by no means meant to be I just know exactly what you're going through and hate the thought of you going to work as it is the last place you need to be.

thanks thanks thanks thanks

HesterShaw Tue 30-Jul-13 09:20:26

No work dearest Twinks. Stay in bed xxx

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Jul-13 10:01:28

Stay home Twink, you don't need to go to work. Re York, that's where I am! See how you feel, depending on how things go it might be good to run away for a couple of days but you might prefer to have the comfort of your own surroundings, see how you feel

Bearfacedchic Tue 30-Jul-13 10:56:36

thanks for today Twink and hope you get some rest. I agree with the others. Don't go to work. Take care of yourself instead.

eurochick Tue 30-Jul-13 11:01:48

Nurse faif has given great advise as usual.

Stay at home, get out box sets/sign up to Netflix and install yourself on the sofa.

As soon as I had the scan to confirm it wasn't working out, I just wanted it over and started "project eviction". I drank loads of strong coffee, went out for brutal runs and did all the things that are ill-advised when preggo. I have no idea if they had any effect or whether it was just stopping the progesterone bullets that brought on my bleed, but I needed to feel in control of the situation and that kind of thing helped. Other people seem to have had very positive experiences with ERPC. The opinions on the tablets seem to be a bit more mixed.

eurochick Tue 30-Jul-13 11:02:17

Argh - "advice". You can tell I work with 'Mericans.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Jul-13 12:44:47

bugs don't worry about seeming blunt, your advice is being taken in the spirit which it was intended.

I have been to the epu, I am going back for a confirmation scan and to discuss my options on Thursday morning. She said the surgery would likely be on Friday, and I think I would prefer to get knocked out and get the majority of the crap out in one go.

I will not be going to work.

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Jul-13 13:53:55

I'm glad you are not going to work, you and your health are No.1 priority at the moment, you need to look after you and so does your fella. No-one/nothing else matters except you both at this point in time.

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 15:24:53

Surgery will mean you can avoid the physical and visual side of it. I was never offered it but wish I was second time round.

Get a sick note until at least the 12th.


eurochick Tue 30-Jul-13 21:47:17

twinks I hope you are doing ok. This is not a happy time for the BESH.

But we will all have our happy endings. <firm>

Thinking of you twinkle

OhBuggerMe Tue 30-Jul-13 22:22:15

Indeed we Will Euro <stands firm>

evilgiraffe Tue 30-Jul-13 22:47:19

Indeed, euro. No BESH left behind, and all that.

This morning I had my third and final zoladex implant (to treat endo, but also unofficial downregging) - which marks "day 1" of my very first IVF cycle, seeing as it has stopped my droid. Stabbing (official downregging) begins on 19th August (day 21), with scan on 10th September and swimming hopefully on 11th September (auspicious date?! hmm). 21 days of downregging seems excessive to me, but meh I'll do what I'm told.

evilgiraffe Tue 30-Jul-13 22:49:34

Hah, I mean stimming, not swimming, obv. Though I don't suppose there's any reason not to go swimming too.

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 08:33:35

Oooh draft that's equally exciting and scary!

twinks how are you today my love?

<holds hands with driz>

Good luck with the drucks Draf.

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 31-Jul-13 08:49:07

Appt. is in the diary for 19 August to pick up drugs hmm

BarbiesBeaver Wed 31-Jul-13 09:14:07

Twinks I am so so sorry. I've had a D & C (and a "normal" miscarriage albeit much earlier along). It was ok - take some reading/distraction material with you (I kept getting my op bumped due to emergencies). You can't eat that day either. They give you a giant san pad but but you might find taking your own big pads nicer. I think I bled for about a week or so afterwards but having it confirmed and all done with helped a tiny amount. Take as long as you need off work (I took 2 days which was silly). And lots of box sets and being kind to both of you afterwards - I was surprised how much it shook my other half and how for months afterwards we still didn't feel "ourselves". Take care.

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 09:19:38

Blimy its IVF a go-go for the BESH at the moment.

<Waves to BB>

I always feel really reassured when former BESH pop back as as BB states she's has mc's and got a maybe in the end or two, I can't remember.

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 09:20:09

Maybe?? I mean baybee of course!

BarbiesBeaver Wed 31-Jul-13 09:25:47

Just the one Bugs. Yes three was my lucky number I think - took 3 years, 3 IUI's and third pregnancy!

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 09:55:14

Good luck with the drucks, draf and also rasp.

bb hi and thank you, the book is a good idea. Congrats on your baybee, that was a long hard road to your win.

I'm ok. HWCA went to work this morning, and I felt really shitty on my own. But he spoke to our boss (we're on the same team), and got sent straight home to me, which was lovely. I'm on compassionate leave now until the 10th, and as I've been on holiday for the last 10 days I may well be chomping at the bit to go back then. Unfortunately my body still thinks I'm diffed and I have all the symptoms on the go still, which is a laugh hmm

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 09:58:39

Your boss sounds very kind and understanding. Being together helps although I did appreciate time on my own to sort my thoughts. I also walked the dogs an awful lot as I think whilst I walk -and talk to the dogs--.

Hopefully the EPU Will offer some more help tomorrow.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 10:04:40

Tomorrow should be a confirmation scan and a date (hopefully Friday) for the erpc. My boss is a sweetheart, he's a big gruff grumpy Scotsman and you'd never guess how kind he is. I am going to bake him a lovely cake when I go back.

We did go for a long walk yesterday. The exercise helped me sleep last night.

How's you anyway bugs?

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 10:10:36

I'm good, you know plodding along keeping busy and trying not to freak out about the stabbing around xmas.

I'm quite a glass half full sort of person so always manage to find and focus on a silver lining.

You will get through this, you will never be quite the same person you were before but you will be ok and will find your smile again.

eurochick Wed 31-Jul-13 10:31:09

Hurrah for good bosses Twink. At least that is one less thing to worry about. Walking and talking to the dogs sounds like great therapy.

BB I'm counting on 3 being my lucky number too - IVF#3 starts as soon as Droid invades.

draf - not long to go now then. How are you doing on the drucks. My bestie is on them (for endo) and finding the side effects a bit much.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 10:31:23

Keeping busy is good. The stabbing is scary shit but you will be fine.

I am well jel of your dogs by the way. I would love a big soppy mutt right now.

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 10:34:29

I have cats too so there is always something to cuddle here. smile

eurochick Wed 31-Jul-13 10:35:43

Oops sorry - it was bugs talking to the dogs. (Haven't had my morning coffee yet so I am clearly not quite with it.)

evilgiraffe Wed 31-Jul-13 10:51:06

Your boss sounds like a good man, Twinks, I'm so pleased work has not made life any more difficult/distressing. Walking and stopping off for cake is a good way of looking after yourself, too.

euro, they're fucking miserable. I'm not getting mood swings really, thankfully, but lots of hot flushes every day (and night) are doing my head in. I get the odd headache too, which is so weird as I usually dont ever have them. Sex drive is down too, though that may be a good thing considering how inept we are at using condoms... I'm hoping that the DR-stabbing won't be much different, symptom-wise. At least I'm now on day 49 since the start of last droid - it's nice having a couple of months off from that shit! And it's all for a good cause, etc, so I'm trying to be positive about it. And I got myself a lovely silk and bamboo Japanese fan from amazon, which helps the flushes no end and is v pretty smile

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 12:32:01

I had night sweats on clomid draf. They were truly awful!

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 15:49:27

Fuck it all, I've just found some bright red blood when I wiped. So much for my nice tidy surgery on Friday sad

eurochick Wed 31-Jul-13 15:53:37

Twink sorry that the bleeding has started.

They might still do the ERPC, if that is what you want. However I didn't feel that the natural option was too awful. Also, one of the 10+ers had an ERPC on the same day I started spotting (both IVF pregnancies, so sad). I stopped bleeding before her and got my period back quicker, so it isn't always the quickest way to have it all over and done with. You should still be able to go ahead with your plan if you want though, I think.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 15:56:02

They weren't going to do it til Friday, if this is the proper start of it then I'll have been bleeding for 2 full days, there wouldn't be much point in doing the erpc by then. Thanks for answering so quickly, even though I was waiting for it, the blood was a bit of a shock.

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 15:58:14

I kind of felt reassurance that my body had dealt with the mc itself without surgery and as euro says my cycles have returned to normal really quickly.

eurochick Wed 31-Jul-13 16:03:39

Twinks I found it a shock to be bleeding again after 2 months off! But I also saw it as a sort of positive thing, because I just wanted to move on and I felt like I had been in limbo for a fortnight (since the first "uncertain" scan).

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 31-Jul-13 16:14:50

I do luffs you both euro and bugs and I wish that you weren't in a position to be so helpful and informed. I am sorry for being so pathetic by the way. I will BESH the fuck up soon.

eurochick Wed 31-Jul-13 17:14:15

You are very far from pathetic Twinks. You are being stoic. You need to grieve. It's a loss of more than just a teeny embryo, it's a loss of a lot of hopes and dreams. You need to process that. <hugs>

OhBuggerMe Wed 31-Jul-13 20:22:51

What euro said.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 31-Jul-13 20:27:16

Sorry twinks the blood is there. I sort of hope for you this is it. I got my period back very quickly too, and mine was natural. Keep your man at hand, painkillers and something to pass the time. Hand holding. And once again you are NOT pathetic. Listen to euro. She's very right!

BarbiesBeaver Wed 31-Jul-13 21:22:22

You are being brave Twinks under terrible circumstances. It is ok to feel in bits right now it is fucking tough on every level.

BarbiesBeaver Wed 31-Jul-13 21:22:22

You are being brave Twinks under terrible circumstances. It is ok to feel in bits right now it is fucking tough on every level.

BarbiesBeaver Wed 31-Jul-13 21:22:31

You are being brave Twinks under terrible circumstances. It is ok to feel in bits right now it is fucking tough on every level.

HesterShaw Wed 31-Jul-13 21:49:34

You're NOT being pathetic. You have every right to feel sad and angry and devastated. It's all shit.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 07:35:02

How is this morning twinks? Did things progress?

BB said is well and many times you are not pathetic and feeling crap is no more than normal at this point in time!

I am having headfuckday, hopefully the clinic will be able to tell me what is going on, it looks like lembie tried to implant, but after that...

OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 07:48:57

Morning driz....what do you mean?

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 07:55:38

Ridiculously faint line, although SB could see it and took photographic evidence. So it can go either way. The blood test will give a better idea.

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 08:20:18

Sorry about the headfuckery driz, good luck for later on at the clinic.

Bleeding seemed to stop over the evening. Another hospital trip today. Worst nights sleep ever - wide awake from 4am onwards.

OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 08:20:51

I don't want to get your hopes up as I know what a headfuck the whole thing is but a line is a line is a line.

faiths line was faint too.

What times is the blood test?

Hope you are ok this morning Twinks.

Drizz, I'm keeping everything crossed for you.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 08:31:18

Thanks! Just been to get the blood drawn, will get the results early afternoon. I know a line is a line but I also know my mc started with a clear line and high hcg, so I just bury my head in the sand.

KeepTheFaithBaby Thu 01-Aug-13 08:45:08

<keeps nipple tassels in reserve> yes Faithlet's first two tests were very faint and fuzzy.

Twinks you are allowed to be however you need to be to get through th

KeepTheFaithBaby Thu 01-Aug-13 08:46:58


This....I'm glad your boss understood that you needed to be together. Hope today goes as smoothly as it can.

evilgiraffe Thu 01-Aug-13 11:13:45

Fingers crossed, driz smile

HesterShaw Thu 01-Aug-13 12:25:21

<says nothing about faint line but waits>

I just had a call from my clinic. I never phoned them after the second IUIfail - somehow I couldn't bear to. It would make it real. Anyway, the nice nurse just phoned and we chatted about what to do next. I told her I had no optimism that IUI would work for us and that I think two more would be wasting time, so she is putting me on the waiting list for IVF. Another waiting list - sigh. This is with the aim of getting it done in January/February....six more months. I will be close to 39 then.

Hest sorry for more waiting. But something worth waiting for!
Driz FX for you
Twink hope you're surviving x

OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 12:32:28

Hest you & me may end up stabbing round the same time but I know how frustrating the wait is. 39 is NOT old.

<offers hand to Driz & twinks >

Today is yorkshire day. By ek!

HesterShaw Thu 01-Aug-13 12:52:46

<sings Why Are We Waiting>

In that case Bugger we can be Stabbing Chums smile

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 12:55:53

HCG was 29, too low to become a viable pregnancy. Stopping progesteron and curling up in a ball to cry.

Oh Driz I'm so sorry. This is a truly shit time for the BESH x

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 13:32:04

driz I'm so sorry lovely. We all wanted a better result for you.

OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 13:37:18

Oh driz that is truly shite. The BESH are really getting a battering at the moment.

thanks thanks thanks thanks

KeepTheFaithBaby Thu 01-Aug-13 13:39:40

I'm so sorry drizz.

eurochick Thu 01-Aug-13 13:43:59

<hugs> for drizz and twinks.

I've had my hypnotherapy session. It was odd. It brought up some expected things and some that were more leftfield. I cried (I never cry). I feel a bit shaken by it (although that could be because I missed my midmorning snack!).

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 13:54:45

Interesting euro. What made you go for hypnotherapy?

Hospital was shite. Because the sac is so small, I have to go for a second set of bloods on Saturday and another scan next week before they can do anything. So that's the (fully booked and paid for) trip to York fucked.

Driz could it not be caused by late implantation?

OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 14:48:16

Twinks speak to the York hotel and explain you have to have an urgent medical procedure and see if you can postpone the trip. York is luffly around Christmas.

eurochick Thu 01-Aug-13 14:59:26

Twink surely they can do the scan when you get back? All they will want to see is no progression between the two scans before they act (and probably falling HCG). Can you call them to see if you can postpone? I think a trip away will do you could.

I'm trying the hypno because I behave like a complete mentalist on EC day. I've never really suffered anxiety before but I have basically had panic attacks around my 2 ECs (and on my last one, set off the theatre alarms because my heart rate went so high as they were prepping me). I hate being out of control of myself that way, so I thought hypno might help. She certainly got somewhere, unearthing pretty deep rooted fears not only of hospitals but also pregnancy, making it unsurprising that I find IVF a little difficult to handle.

It was slightly woo, but not too much. She mostly seems to work with athletes, so is fairly practical and not too airy fairy.

For example, she asked me to visualise a timeline of my life and whether it went left to right or vice versa and whether I was looking at it or in it. I was in it, so far so normal. The only slightly odd thing is, I wasn’t at the present! We didn’t really explore why together, but I guess it corresponds to feeling like my life has been on hold for the last couple of years. There was a bunch of stuff like that, that is just making me think about stuff.

eurochick Thu 01-Aug-13 14:59:44


OhBuggerMe Thu 01-Aug-13 15:06:15


Help me BESH.

CaptainMoll Thu 01-Aug-13 15:42:58

Drizz so sorry, and Twinks I hope you're being looked after.

bugger I am smearing fishpaste all over the chocolate so you don't eat any more of it.

Euro hypno sounds interesting, maybe I should send BE for some.. He starts CBT next week - that only took 7 months on a fecking waiting list. And I'm still waiting for the Gynae to call me and tell me if I'm on Clomid or not.
<rolls eyes>
<joins in chorus with Hest and Bugs>

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 15:48:44


euro as much as I would love a trip away, I would be too worried about starting to bleed on the train or in the hotel bed to relax properly.

I got home from the hospital to a letter confirming my next ante-natal appointment. ffs.

moll at least BE is getting some help at last, I suppose. I hope it helps matters. Can you chase up the gynae consultant for answers?

The hypno sounds good, I hope it helps you next time euro. What is the timetable?

eurochick Thu 01-Aug-13 16:02:51

In that case, go with Bugs' idea. You never know, you might get something out of it!

Stoopid hospital. Grrr.

The timetable is: have follow up appointment next Wednesday and second anti-metalist seesion next Thursday. Droid should arrive late next week. And then we're off again.

moll that sounds like progress.

bugs I could never tell anyone to stop eating chocolate. It would go against all my principles.

evilgiraffe Thu 01-Aug-13 16:37:08

Oh, driz, I'm so sorry sad

Idiot hospital, Twink. And so infuriating about York, too. Can you use the time to do something else for the two of you? A day-trip or suchlike, and a fancy dinner (or just your favourite dinner) at home?

I'm no use to you, bugs, I just bought a load of ice cream and some chocolate buttons...

alwyn Thu 01-Aug-13 18:19:35

Twink do you have an annual travel insurance policy? You could (possibly) claim on that as you'd still be travelling within Europe?

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 19:29:36

The trip is sorted. We have given it to HWCA's parents - his dad is retired and his mum works part time. Wednesday and Thursday happen to be her days off, and by coincidence they had a trip to York cancelled earlier this year. I'm pleased. al I do have.annual travel insurance, so that was Plan B.

euro the timetable sounds exhausting, but it's good that you're getting support.

Plenty of room in the Pit, come in and huddle up, everyone who feels need of it most of us The gardeners are making a good job of the herbaceous borders, and are lining them with cockle shells for us.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 19:35:18

I wholeheartedly recommend wine <huddles in the pit with twinks> Shall I crochet us a blanket? Even though it is HOT?

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 01-Aug-13 19:54:31

I am going to confess something stupid. I cannot quite face alcohol until the NHS has confirmed a total loss. Wine's time will come though, oh yes.

Is crocheting difficult driz? Now that I apparently can't sleep any more, and MN is very quiet in the wee hours, I feel I need a noiseless hobby to occupy me.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Thu 01-Aug-13 20:29:39

Crochet is easy and fun, but you just need to get your sleep back. How are you doing? Limbo-land between scans that are going badly is so horrid. And no, it is not weird not to drink, I didn't in the week between our first bad scan and the second scan+ mc last year. Hand hold, and I'll put some gin ready for you in this corner. Unless I drink it all first.

OhBuggerMe Fri 02-Aug-13 08:05:17

Morning all.

Thand god its Friday today. it means I can healthy eating from Monday as I have severely fallen off the wagon this week.

I woke myself up farting in the night too <chatty>

Morning all. Just catching up on yesterday:

Drizz I'm so sorry about Lembie.

Twinks I'm sorry about the added crap of having to lose out on your trip away.

eurochick Fri 02-Aug-13 10:58:09

Twink how are you doing today? Giving the trip away sounds like a good plan - you do a good deed and at least someone will get to enjoy it. And hopefully you can do something nice with the time off.

bugs I've done that too. <jumps on the chatty bandwagon>

There was HAIL in London this morning. How completely bonkers.

evilgiraffe Fri 02-Aug-13 15:50:20

Wow, BESHes, I am nearly dead. On the other hand, I've (finally) taken a heap of books to the charity shop, and the whole house is now about as close to spotless as it's likely to get. Why the housework blitz, you ask? ILs are coming tomorrow...

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 02-Aug-13 16:32:59

Well done driz, good effort. Tea and cake time for you. Do you get on with your in laws? I had to do a half hearted clean up because the boiler repair man was coming round.

I went for a swim today thinking it would make me feel better. All it did was give me too much thinking time. Then my best black bra broke in the changing rooms (how long should a bra live? This was expensive) and tesco didn't have the bread I wanted so I nearly had a temper tantrum. Oh well.

euro the weather is being crazy here too, so cold overnight I slept with the duvet on, now I could keel over with the heat.

bugs the wagon disappeared into the dust out of sight for me. When I go back to work my uniform trousers are going to be very uncomfortable.

evilgiraffe Fri 02-Aug-13 17:45:04

Yeah, we get on fine, and they'd never judge us (out loud) for living in a hovel, but it's nice to try and make the place look respectable! Though actually we'll be out most of the day, as FIL wants to go bike shopping and HOTB has booked a table for pub lunch. Should be quite fun, I think smile

evilgiraffe Fri 02-Aug-13 17:48:18

And I have no idea about bra life, sorry. All mine seem to last quite well, but according to the bra police I'm wearing wildly the wrong size. Along those lines... Although 36D fits me pretty well - the idea of a 32FF (according to the "right" way of measuring) seems way off. Not least because I'm not fond of giant obvious cups and prefer balconette styles, which might be difficult in a big cup size? confused

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 02-Aug-13 18:40:19

Bugs-seriously you've got nuthin on me on the food front girlfriend *waves hands* in bugs face. No word of a lie I've had at least 5000 calories a DAY every day since last Saturday.

OhBuggerMe Fri 02-Aug-13 20:30:24

I'm delighted to report I've managed to climb back on the wagon and have not eaten anything bad today. I've also done a double gym class so I can hardly walk!!

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 02-Aug-13 20:59:28

Well done bugs

What's everyone up to this weekend?

eurochick Fri 02-Aug-13 21:24:39

Well done bugs! I was planning on gymming tonight, but ended up working until 8 and unsurprisingly couldn't face it then. I've suddenly got really busy again at work. It's probably a good thing as it'll give me something else to think about, but I hope I don't get so busy that it'll interfere with IVF appointments.

rasp nice work. I'm contemplating ice cream...

Twink do you have nice plans for the weekend? I think we will have a fairly quiet one tomorrow. On Sunday, we are taking my dad shooting (our club is having a guest day), which should be fun. smile

Most of my bras are ancient. In fact I even had a half-hearted bra buying expedition last weekend but wasn't inspired. I'm probably in the "wrong" size as well but I couldn't give a stuff. I wear 34C/36B. When I was shopping for wedding undies an assistant got me to try a 32D. It does sort of work, but I always end up ripping it off as soon as I come home as I just find it too tight. I'd rather wear the "wrong" size and be comfortable.

draf I haven't had an inlaw visit for month. I suspect one is coming.

I came home to find that KFZK had bought me not one, but two, lovely bunches of flowers. He's definitely a keeper.

OhBuggerMe Fri 02-Aug-13 21:50:10

Aww Euro what a sweetie. My flowers are almost dead so I'll replace them tomorrow.

Tomorrow I'm dog walking and food shopping that at a charity event. Sunday another long walk and a roast at my mothers.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 03-Aug-13 07:13:02

MATV has only ever bought me flowers once when I moaned at him. He sent them to my work marked 'from your secret admirer' then refused to admit they were from him so when I got home I told him it turned out it was one of the caretakers who had now asked me out on a day smile MATV was not impressed

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 03-Aug-13 07:16:33


TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 07:21:00

HWCA isn't much of a one for flowers, which is a shame.

Those weekends sound nice. I am going up to the hospital for a blood test this morning then meeting a good friend for lunch. I could do with buying a new black bra now, but I might leave it until my enormo-boobs have gone back to normal.

evilgiraffe Sat 03-Aug-13 08:06:35

I hope the blood test isn't too awful, Twink. Glad you've got good people around smile

HOTB isn't much of a one for flowers any more either. Though when we were first together (and living with our parents) he did on several occasions leave surprise bunches of flowers on the doorstep, for birthdays, valentines and suchlike. These days I tend to buy flowers for him, if I want flowers in the house! We've been together for thirteen years now - scary shit shock

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 03-Aug-13 08:23:09

13 yrs here too Evil! Scary how quick the time has gone though, nice though.

Hope the bloods go ok Twink. How come they have to be done in A&E? I should buy something to spoil yourself later, maybe not a bra til your boobs are down like you say but something else lovely.

Drizz how are you?

Where's frank? Haven't heard from her for a while have we?

FizzyFeet Sat 03-Aug-13 08:51:09

13 years is impressive!

FizzyFeet Sat 03-Aug-13 08:55:06

Oops, posted too soon. Only 6 years for us (though we've known each other longer).

I'm feeling a bit torn today. It's the birthday party of my nephew, who was born on my due date from ectopic #1 last year. I'm just not sure I can do it without dissolving into tears. There's no family pressure to go or anything, but I would feel bad about GFBW having to go on his own. Argh. And droid is on the way. Boo.

Drizz and Twinks hope you are able to look after yourselves this weekend.

Hello all, I'm still here! Feeling a bit in limbo as not quite ready to fully commit to being a PESH but don't want to offend any BESH by hanging round like a bad smell wink

HWHNN and I have been together 11.5 years and married for 5 years next month. He does surprise me with flowers from time to time, and I always get bunched on Valentine's and our wedding anniversary.

Twinks, hope you have an easy weekend.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 09:43:21

rasp A&E because the epu and phlebotomy are both shut at the weekends. I'm booked in and waiting now. I used to work as an A&E receptionist and I always hated booking in the suspected miscarriages - the stricken expressions on the women's faces were always the same and always heartbreaking. How odd to be on the other side of it.

Ugh fizz that's crappy. Good luck with whatever you do.

frank your presence could never offend me lovely. Have the Scallops of Stupidity for thinking that. Overcooked rubbery scallops, at that.

twinklestar2 Sat 03-Aug-13 10:12:05

My fellow twinks. I sometimes lurk around here to see how euro is doing and was devastated to read your news. I let out a gasp of shock and sadness and agree with everyone else, why do these shit things happen to us, when all we want is a child - something that the whole world just has without any struggle.

I'm angry for you.

Take care of yourself love and PM me if you need anything, to shout, cry, scream. I'll be there.

flowers to everyone else.

twinklestar2 Sat 03-Aug-13 10:22:01

Oh FFS I just read Lemon's post too. I'm so sorry, love.

Wtf is happening at the moment?

So sorry to hijack the thread.

HesterShaw Sat 03-Aug-13 10:34:50

How is everyone today? <loving kipper slaps to Twinks and Drizz> We BESH bumble along for a couple of months with nowt much happening and then lurch wildly between extreme highs and extreme lows don't we? sad

Talking of anniversaries, it's ours today. Eleven years married - I can hardly believe it. And fourteen together. That's bloody ages.

I'm currently on my longest ever cycle. I don't know exactly as I haven't been counting days properly, but I do remember testing on the 27th June after the second IUI and droid appearing two or three days after that. We've only Done It once though, and I have a feeling I ov-ed very late, judging from the pant snot memories <chatty>

Actually I've got no idea confused. No sore boobs, slight womble cramps, but not the the hint of a tint.

evilgiraffe Sat 03-Aug-13 11:00:28

We're watching Saturday Kitchen while waiting for ILs to turn up... All is well smile That is one good thing about the DR drucks; I'm on such an emotional even keel because I haven't got wildly fluctuating hormone levels.

Happy anniversary, Hest! And long cycle/no droid, eh? <eyes kidneys speculatively>

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 03-Aug-13 11:08:59

Happy anniversary hes. Really impressive times all of you lot! SB and I will have been together for 5 years this month, married for 3.

Sorry about the bloods and waiting twinks. Hope the lunch with a friend is good.

I am falling to bits a lot little. Been weeping on a train, out for dinner and during sechs so far. So that's great. I've just realised that this might turn into a full-blown mc and scupper our hols as well. Not f... fair.

<stamps feet, picks up kipper so we have something for tea, and wanders of to land of woe>

eurochick Sat 03-Aug-13 11:20:05

<waves to other twinkle>

Twinks A&E isn't a nice way to start the weekend. I'm glad you have a nice lunch to look forward to.

Happy anniversary hest! 11 years - blimey. We will have our 3rd anniversary later this month, but we'll have been together for 10 years then (ignoring a few break ups along the way).

drizz that sounds really hard. <hands over cod of comfort>

Something very odd is going on in euroland. According to temps and when I think I oved, I'm 7 or 8 dpo. I am spotting. I never spot. Ever (in fact the only time I can think of is the day before my mc kicked off so that is once in 25 years of droiding). I have however started my period around 9dpo twice and both times I suspect implantation failure. Hmmm.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 11:25:59

Oh driz sad I wish there were the words to make you feel better. When is the holiday meant to be? I get you with the crying. I feel like shares in Kleenex would have been a wise investment. I cried into my swimming goggles yesterday.

twinklestar thank you for your thoughts. I believe you're also in need of some hand holding? Take care.

Happy anniversary hest, you doing anything nice?

I am back from the hospital. Thursday's hcg levels were fairly high, if I didn't know my dates so well I would almost have myself convinced that there was still hope that I'd just fucked up counting.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 11:27:05

Cross posted with euro - hmm interesting

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 11:28:38

That was intended as more of a scientific interest eyebrow raise. It just looks sarcastic. Crap emoticon.

twinklestar2 Sat 03-Aug-13 11:32:23

Thank twinks for the hand hold, life is shit at the moment. I thought the IVF was the answer and the end of a long road of TTC. Now it feels like that was the start of the long and winding road of IVF, a road that feels very overwhelming and one I think I'm not strong enough to travel but I have to otherwise I'll never get what I want.

HesterShaw Sat 03-Aug-13 11:42:07

What a good description twinks.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 03-Aug-13 11:49:02

Balls to it all twinklestar. I'm so sorry this cycle didn't work for you. It's such a huge physical and emotional investment for it not to work out, financial as well if it's private. You've always been so positive before - I hate seeing you so down. Do you have good rl support?

Fancies40Winks Sat 03-Aug-13 11:54:46

By the way, I've gone for a less cheerful and more accurate name...

eurochick Sat 03-Aug-13 13:14:30

What I want to know is... who's 40Winks, eh? wink

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 03-Aug-13 15:21:41

Holds hand out to 40winks, that is an incredibly apt description of the weird world of IVF and a real surprise when you get into it.

We also thought that IVF would be the end of the road and a way to get closure. And here we are with a failing diffment and 6 frosties, so as SB counted on his fingers it'll take us nearly a year to get through this first full round of IVF. Of course I am delighted we got so many frosties, because my womble seems capable of implanting, if you hold and acceptable-looking Lembie close enough. But I do not know how many times I can here the words, yes you are pregnant but it is not a viable pregnancy. Twice seems quite enough I might give my multiple mc-friend a call later to here her healthy son and daughter in the background.

Hand hold for twinks too. How was lunch? We had lunch out too and it was good.

Flatness on DRing drucks is something I had too, apparently draf. Pleased it has benefits. Although with the headaches and knackeredness, I didn't notice it much myself, but SB is pleased to have the full range of lemon-moods in the house.

Euro I spotted at the exact official moment for implantation with Lembie too, just saying. I really hope no droid arrives. But if it does, would looking at extra progesterone be an option?

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 03-Aug-13 15:22:11

hear not here

Fancies40Winks Sat 03-Aug-13 15:27:59

( driz I am Besh-twinks, not the (much nicer) egg-buddies twinks smile )

Lunch was ok. I don't think my friend gets why this is a big deal. Or maybe it isn't a big deal really. After all, I have managed to conceive, and the clomid is waiting for me, and what's a few more months anyway.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 03-Aug-13 15:36:17

Urgh, hand holds, hugs and halibut slaps all round. Hest is right, we lurch from one highly emotional roller coaster to another in here don't we! I sometimes think if I knew what would happen, the actual outcome would bother me less. So say if someone could say to me, you'll have a baby after trying for 10 yrs and it will happen when you are 36 or 'sorry, you will never conceive naturally'. At least I could stop everything being on hold, I'd have a way forward.

Fancies40Winks Sat 03-Aug-13 15:39:14

rasp I whole heartedly agree. If I knew I would win a baybee, it would all be worth it. If I knew it was never going to happen, I could start to move on.

Oh, my friend did say one thing that made me smile - she suggested online forums (fora?) for support. I'm all over that!

OhBuggerMe Sat 03-Aug-13 16:21:16

I think that sums it up totally. I would hop skip & dance into IVF if I knew it would work. Hell id even go through ec without any sedation.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 03-Aug-13 17:01:06

Online forums you say? I don't know, the internets are just not a safe place for innocent unsuspecting peoples like me!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 03-Aug-13 17:05:52

Online forums, pah. So your bitch friend had one sensible thing to say. Phew. I was thinking you had voluntarily met up with a witch. GRRR. PS names is all to much, my head hurts enough maybe no drowning of sorrows tonight.

Hmm halibut. I fancy some for tea.

HesterShaw Sat 03-Aug-13 18:16:21

Oh I confused myself didn't I? I'll try again:

What a good description Twinklestar! grin

eurochick Sat 03-Aug-13 19:39:54

It appears to be droidal invasion rather than spotting here. At 7-8 dpo. WTAF?

I last had this in November. Also when I gave up wheat (which I am doing again). V odd.

evilgiraffe Sat 03-Aug-13 19:46:57

I absolutely agree, rasp - any sort of certainty about anything would be a big help. This is probably why I feel much better when I have appointment dates etc, because it gives me something solid to deal with.

Day with ILs has been really nice. I have two (two!) new bottles of gin, and a big heap of new plants, and a full belly from a gigantic lunch smile

Fancypants, your friend sounds like one of those unimaginative souls who needs to experience something first hand to understand it. Makes me want to hand her a bucket of empathy and a hmm face.

evilgiraffe Sat 03-Aug-13 19:49:48

Weird, euro. <shrug> That wouldn't be that odd for me, my luteal phase is about 9-10 days in the first place, but strange if that's not your usual! Innards are baffling.

Fancies40Winks Sat 03-Aug-13 20:01:42

euro that is really odd. Why are you giving up wheat? Did you feel better for it before, and did your cycles re-normalise?

draf glad you had a good day. Quality gifting from the in-laws.

You can tell frank isn't here much. We haven't had a link to the new Sherlock trailer yet smile

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 04-Aug-13 08:08:37

I'm not a wheat/dairy person by rule. I didn't have any odd cycle stuff go on when I cut it out though. That said any big changes in life can play havoc with hormones and now Twinks has said it I kind of wonder whether it mad something to do with my cycles getting a bit irregular. I eat like a beast though!

grin @ 40Winks, the trailer is short but good. And what the hell has Martin Freeman got stuck to his top lip?!

I know I've mentioned it before, but a low GI diet is good for PCOS sufferers as there are links between hormone production and insulin levels. I guess it would not be unreasonable to assume that it might help other fertility issues that are hormone related?

eurochick Sun 04-Aug-13 09:15:36

40Winks I gave up in wheat for a month last year to see if it would give me more energy as I was tired all the time. It didn't, but I had this weird experience of droid arriving at 9dpo. I actually went to acu on the morning of 9 dpo. She told me later her notes said "pregnant?" for that session. A few hours later, I had a Niagara Falls of blood. Because of that, I tried it again for my first IVF cycle, the one that ended in mc at 8 weeks. I thought I'd give it another go for this IVF cycle, so I stopped wheat when I came back from Italy a couple of weeks ago. It's v odd.

draf those are ILs of which the BESH can definitely approve. Enjoy the gin!

OhBuggerMe Sun 04-Aug-13 09:32:22

WIBU to write on all the "my period is 70 years late could I be pregnant" freds that have popped up - YES now luck off and POAS!!

The conception boards seem full of newbies and I feel very.protective of MN all of a sudden.

OhBuggerMe Sun 04-Aug-13 09:32:51

*Fuck not luck! Doh

Fancies40Winks Sun 04-Aug-13 09:34:59

Bugs - Nope. Do it.

eurochick Sun 04-Aug-13 09:35:25

I liked the BESH response on one of those threads of "have you tried pissing on your keyboard?"....

OhBuggerMe Sun 04-Aug-13 09:52:11

Arf!! I haven't seen that one euro!

HesterShaw Sun 04-Aug-13 10:07:16

That was AlpinePony smile

Fancies40Winks Sun 04-Aug-13 10:37:07

Last whinge, I promise...

This time last week I was at my booking in appointment, discussing antenatal classes and birth plans. I was going to tell work about my diffment today.

I liked last week a whole lot better.

Also my toilet has joined the boiler in giving up the ghost AND the car door still needs to be repaired. I resign as an adult.

HesterShaw Sun 04-Aug-13 10:53:45

Being an adult sucks


RaspberrySnowCone Sun 04-Aug-13 11:03:20

yup, adulthood is shit.

twinklestar2 Sun 04-Aug-13 14:20:06

Hello all,

I agree with the person who said its the uncertainty of it all which gets to you. Living your life in limbo land. Having to have sex when you don't want to and your heart is broken.

40 - you poor thing. I'm the same but in reverse order. I keep thinking how different my life would be now if the ivf had just fucking worked. Just work, it's not too much to ask is it?! Now I have to face people with this big hole on my heart and act normally. Biggest motherfrickin sigh EVER.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 04-Aug-13 16:58:37

Oh dear, I popped in to let you lot know that things are looking a lot brighter after loads of exercise, sun and a beer with SB. Also, I guess since bleeding has started hormones have settled a bit. But the would-have-been-could-have-been-should-have-beens are awful. I did think we should have a 3 month old (mc last year) now. But the IVF chem-diffment will be dealt with soon. I have however realised this is not the first chem-diffment I've had... Should I worry about that?

So sorry both twinks and hand-hold for you both.

And grin at the trailer that got frank in here like a flash!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 04-Aug-13 17:00:55

Also euro that is weird and would bother me. The correlation with wheatfree is also odd. Whatever else happens, I am keeping everything crossed for this cycle!

OhBuggerMe Sun 04-Aug-13 17:19:08

possibly driz. Maybe speak to your gp about low dose aspirin.

eurochick Sun 04-Aug-13 19:45:02

Winks and drizz, I had a bit of a hard time with the "would have been could have been" scenarios when I hit the should have been 6 months point in July. They are hard.

drizz it is weird. I had one of these cycles (I think - I wasn't cycle tracking as closely back then) before we started ttc. And then two more, both when off wheat. Does it mean being off wheat is a good thing because we are at least getting to chemicals? Or is it a bad thing because it messes up my cycles? Who TF knows? Like you, I am not sure having more ?chemicals? is a good thing or not.

I'm glad you are feeling a bit more positive.

twinklestar2 if you wish to succumb to the cult of the BESH, find the BESHtionnaire and join us (unless you have already of course, in which case, ignore me).

I also agree that adulthood is hard. Responsibility seems to be relentless.

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 04-Aug-13 22:17:01

Responsibility sucks. Spent some time with my cousins very cute kids this afternoon, 6 and 5. The biggest problem each of them had was (for the girl) it was too cold to wear a Disney princess dress outside in the rain and (for the boy) the cola flavored ice pop he was given after tea did not melt quickly enough to be eaten immediately on removal from the fridge. Those are problems I could cope with.

OhBuggerMe Mon 05-Aug-13 07:45:34

I remember when locating my favourite Sweater Shop jumper was my biggest worry!!

driz glad things are progressing and you feel a bit better.

Winks how are you my love?

sink iirc its your 2nd scan today? Do please let us know how it goes.

I am knackered this morning. I've been having really weird vivid dreams each night since Friday (7dpo). Its obviously hormone related. I neeeeeeed sleeeeeeeep!

RabbitFromAHat Mon 05-Aug-13 08:41:44

I am so sorry to delurk and I promise I'll go away in a mo! I am not quite ready to qualify for the BESH yet (although I'm well up as regards swearing, booze-swilling, decrepitude and fish-slapping) but I just thought I'd say on the wheat thing:

without being one of those wet Wilhelminas who says "have you not tried XXX?", there is a distinct link between coeliac disease, recurrent miscarriage, and unexplained infertility. Having been essentially symptomless bar exhaustion till a few dots were joined and I got my blood tested, I never would have guessed I was coeliac. It's just something to throw in the hat if you're having really strong reactions to wheat or other grains, bearing in mind that you'd need to be eating it in order to get a clear blood result. I am now basically trying to grow my intestinal lining back in search of the elusive baybee.

Best of luck, BESH.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Mon 05-Aug-13 08:56:11

Intriguing rabbit.

Quick waves from me, things going okay in the lemon household!

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 05-Aug-13 09:14:21

I'd never heard of that link either. Will explore.....

I think my insides have decided they've had enough. This week has been a huge bow out on the food and drink front. MATV is back to work Wednesday so we'll finish off all the crap in the house today/tomorrow and then back on the wagon smile

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 05-Aug-13 09:15:19

*blow not bow!

twinklestar2 Mon 05-Aug-13 09:35:43

Rabbit, I've heard the same too. My friend has gone gluten free after a mc.

Euro - I'm not ready to properly join and commit to a thread. That may seem selfish but it's the way I feel at the moment. I'll dip in and out of a few, wishing people luck and commiserating when needed but doing personals, people constantly asking me question, etc, I just can't cope with it at the moment.

KeepTheFaithBaby Mon 05-Aug-13 09:49:36

It's also important to note that coeliacs are prescribed a much higher dose of folic acid (think its 5mg). GP can do a simple blood test for it but you'd have to eat wheat for 6 weeks beforehand so it doesn't give a false negative.

<runs off into night with sexy gardener>

eurochick Mon 05-Aug-13 10:26:16

Thanks all. I read about the coeliac link after my similar experience in November. I think I swiftly pushed it to the back of my mind as a long term future without cake and proper bread filled me with horror. We'll see what this (wheat free IVF) cycle brings. If it fails or I mc, my first reaction last time was to reach for toast and coffee. So I can then do my 6 weeks of wheat eating and then try to get tested.

Rabbit so you were just exhausted? I went to the drs for TATT (tired all the time) about 6 years ago and they couldn't find anything. Slightly low iron stores but no anaemia. Iron helps a bit but I still seem to have no energy. Hmmm.

twink I hope you are doing ok. Join if and when you feel ready.

RabbitFromAHat Mon 05-Aug-13 10:53:25

Euro I was exhausted but not enough to go to the doctor, as I have an extraordinarily demanding lifestyle - it actually got found out entirely separately: I had a MRI for a sports injury and asked my sports doc to throw in a DXA scan as there's a family history of osteoporosis and I wanted a base line to measure any future deterioration against (I'm a researcher by trade and inclination!).

It turned out from the scan that I already have degenerated bones (osteoporosis in my spine and hips) which led my doc to do more investigating, and that gave me a conclusion: coeliac disease, and autoimmune liver disorder. I would have had literally no idea.

If it helps, I know one of the factors that was used to kick off the investigation was a low ferritin count (bear in mind mine was 4 where it ought to be 30-something - apparently my general high level of physical fitness was masking a lot of stuff for me). The days when coeliac disease was only looked into if you were skinny and shitting yourself twelve times a day are over.

I had been off the pill for several years without success, had a miscarriage in my twenties, and am non-BESHtastic on account of the fact that I have been told to stop TTC till the end of the year to give my body a chance to recover.

eurochick Mon 05-Aug-13 12:05:08

rabbit thanks for sharing. I had put my levels of tiredness down to my stressful job. It was only when I was put on garden leave and sleeping in until 10 each day and still tired that I thought something might be up and went for investigations. That's interesting about the low ferritin level. I just can't maintain mine. I've been on iron supplements of various kinds since I went to the GP 6 years ago. Hmmm.

I hope your recovery goes well.

RabbitFromAHat Mon 05-Aug-13 12:18:32

Thanks Euro! I am optimistic apart from the rage about this only being picked up at my hag-like age and don't find the diet aspect too hard, apart from eating out, which I am still getting the hang of. I feel so much better generally that it's a complete revelation.

It used to be harder to pick up; an intestinal biopsy is still the only way of confirming it, but these days you can have what's called a Ttg test, which looks for particular antibodies in your blood, as CD is an autoimmune disorder rather than 'allergy' or 'intolerance. So as well as the fact that one gets malnourished (not that you'd think it to look at me, bwhahaha!) which makes conception less likely, having an immune system on high alert for intruders is not exactly great conditions for conception.

I also now have a billion new cake recipes grin

Phew thought I'd lost you there BESH as you fell off my active list shock
<waves to lurkers>
Hope Driz and Winks and everyone else holding up ok

OhBuggerMe Mon 05-Aug-13 21:58:07

Nope merk we're still here.

I'm pretty sure I'm not diffed this cycle. My boots aren't even remotely bigger. At least I get an opportunity to try my new mooncup with a full invasion.

OhBuggerMe Mon 05-Aug-13 21:58:54

Or even my boobs. My boots have been the same size a number of years grin

HesterShaw Mon 05-Aug-13 22:02:50

Whereas mine appear to be diminishing with every passing year. A tragedy as they were never particularly impressive.

Droidal ache, no droid, day 36 or something. Will maybe test in a couple of days. I'm completely certain I'm not diffed though.

OhBuggerMe Mon 05-Aug-13 22:22:12

<eyes up kidneys>

I'm testing on Sat if no droid before then.

OhBuggerMe Mon 05-Aug-13 22:24:09

Hows your tummy now Hest?

eurochick Mon 05-Aug-13 22:41:31

rabbit thanks for all the info. Were you diagnosed recently?

<joins bugs' in staring at hest's kidneys> Hmmm.

RabbitFromAHat Tue 06-Aug-13 08:23:01

Euro, in June after the investigations started off in January. It's hard to know if it would have been picked up separately, but I was already talking to my doctor about [shudder] infertility referrals, and this never came up, so it's hard to know if it ever would have.

I would like to stress that undiagnosed CD is suspected of being a significant cause of infertility; however once it's diagnosed and managed, I'm told one's chances go back to normal after recovery, or at least as normal as they would have been anyway.

So it's a risk stopping TTC to the end of the year at least (depending on how my next results are) as I'm hitting 39 soon, but it seems a risk worth taking if my chances then get better. Annoyingly, anything else that could be wrong with me won't be investigated until next year, so it's going to be a while till I know whether there are other things rendering me B (the ESH I can manage perfectly well on my own, so hopefully I'll be submitting a fish-and gin-stained application form soon).

Good luck BESH.

Fancies40Winks Tue 06-Aug-13 08:28:29

<gets out of Pit briefly to get a better view of hest's kidneys>

eurochick Tue 06-Aug-13 10:37:52

Thanks rabbit. It's annoying that they won't do other investigations during the "waiting period". Hopefully you will never need to add the B to the ESH, but if you do, we will be awaiting your BESHtionnaire.

I did a bit of research last night and this para (from the wikipedia coeliac page) could have been written about me:
"Abdominal pain and cramping, bloatedness with abdominal distension (thought to be due to fermentative production of bowel gas) and mouth ulcers[7] may be present. As the bowel becomes more damaged, a degree of lactose intolerance may develop.[4] Frequently, the symptoms are ascribed to irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), only later to be recognised as coeliac disease; a small proportion of people with symptoms of IBS have underlying coeliac disease, and screening for coeliac disease is recommended for those with IBS symptoms"

We talked about it last night and decided that I will do this current cycle wheat free, as planned. If it doesn't work, I will go back on the wheat to get tested before we cycle again. The description from wiki (which also mentions the low ferratin thing) has made us both think this is worth pursuing.

But, but, but, no more proper cake <wails>

Winks how are you doing?

Hest how are the kidneys?

CaptainMoll Tue 06-Aug-13 12:25:45

Hi all. Hope Winks and Driz are ok. Verr interesting on the CD front, thanks for dropping in Rabbit.

How's everyone else? Have some hedge trimmings, a diet coke and this guy

I have nothing to report. No sechsing, no word from gynae, nada, zilch zip.

Except that yesterday I fitted comfortably into a size 14 top, and I haven't managed that for about 10 years or something. So despite my weight stubbornly still giving me an "obese" reading on the BMI, I do seem to be shrinking. Go figure.

Fancies40Winks Tue 06-Aug-13 16:50:07

moll good effort, well done.

I'm not brilliant. I'm fed up of missing out on my birthday lunch, trip away, visit to a friend last night because I bled a bit (only a little but I thought things might be starting) etc etc. And I've still got painful boobs and morning sickness! My blood tests both came back over 15000 for hcg so it's not a surprise i'm still getting symptoms. Roll on the end of the week. Oh - and I am FAT. Between trying to fight the morning sickness, and the comfort eating, I feel like a proper lardarse sad

Enough about me. How's everyone else?

OhBuggerMe Tue 06-Aug-13 19:29:36

And where is Sinks

Fancies40Winks Tue 06-Aug-13 19:39:57

She was posting on the pesh fred a few days ago, her scan was the day after mine & it went well, heartbeat and everything.

FizzyFeet Tue 06-Aug-13 19:44:20

Hang in there, Winkly. This too shall pass.

I have next appt at the clinic on Friday. And have had a very nice but totally meaningless letter from the consultant who did my surgery saying that I should go to my GP if I get pregnant again as I'm at higher risk of ectopic. I feel like writing back in purple biro capitals 'HOW CAN I GET PREGNANT AGAIN THAT WAS MY LAST TUBE'. And breathe. Hopefully they will have actually read my notes on Friday so I don't have to say this out loud to anyone. Keep an eye on the news for unexplained explosions in the Oxfordshire area.

OhBuggerMe Tue 06-Aug-13 20:33:50

Fab news sinks.

Thus fred is very slow moving & quiet at the moment. We need new recruits!

Fizz Doctors are nobbers aren't they?

eurochick Tue 06-Aug-13 21:18:24

fizz that is truly rubbish. I think you should write back. A consultant should be able to count to 2...

Winks hopefully things will get going for you soon. It took a while before I stopped feeling pregnant and getting positive tests. I stopped testing in the end because it was depressing seeing the lines. I was only doing it because it was natural and I wanted to make sure it was "complete".

Hurrah for the shrinking moll. I've just made myself go to the gym for the first time in flipping ages. Getting going again after a break is always hard work.

The fred is quiet bugs. It's a great thing that we have so many grads, but maybe we need to start a recruitment drive!

evilgiraffe Tue 06-Aug-13 22:22:41

It's all unbelievably shit, winks.

Your consultant really wrote that, fizz?! What a bellend.

Nice to meet you, rabbit, I hope you don't qualify for BESHness by January, but you're welcome if you do smile

All is okay with me at the minute. I feel rather in limbo as we still have another couple of weeks before stabbing starts, and then three weeks of downregging before starting stimming. I can't help but think of stimms as being the "real" drucks, if you see what I mean? I know it's nonsense, but the downregging is rather an anticlimax given I'm already downregging anyway. It's all so frustrating.

Still, I'm window shopping for kittens, which is fun, though I feel guilty as Oldcat in particular would not appreciate one, so I feel like I'm planning for her demise. I quite fancy spending £££ and getting a Bengal (they look fantastic, like proper leopard style killing machines), but suspect they might be a bit too noisy. Has anyone met one in real life?

twinklestar2 Tue 06-Aug-13 22:27:33

Hi girls, me again smile I have another question if anyone has had a failed cycle?

We had ICSI and we got to blasto stage. I read on google today that after day 3 the egg takes over from the sperm and if it fails to implant then it means the egg wasn't strong enough. Is that right? I'm panicking now as I thought the probs were always on OHs side and I know you can't improve egg quality. Please advise.

OhBuggerMe Wed 07-Aug-13 08:21:39

Sorry Wink2 I'm not sure. I've recently been to an ivf preaentation evening an don't remember that being mentioned. The consultant went into a lot of detail so I'm sure if it were true, he'd have mentioned it.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 07-Aug-13 09:03:03

Sorry winky no idea about when IVF fails after blastocyst, sadly. But I do know the embryonic genome kicks in between day 3 and 5, and that this is the single most likely bit that can fail. If your egg quality is really a problem, they should be able to tell from morphology, particularly when you do ICSI.

How's 40winks today?

Nothing unreasonable about buying loads of kittens draf. I wish I wasn't allergic.

The coeliac disease thing sounds intriguing, fingers crossed you won't have to go into the tests euro because take 3 with take for real. But if you do I'll be very interested. Thanks for sharing rabbit and sorry for being on an endless wait... Fingers crossed it all works out.

As for me, I am just flat. Not a weeping mess so much as an over all feeling of not being bothered enough to do anything. Blurgh. It all sucks. I am through with work, but have lots to finish before we bugger off to recover and hike some hills soon...

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 07-Aug-13 19:54:17

Did I kill the fred?

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 07-Aug-13 20:33:27

Has been very quite of late. I don't think you killed the Fred though Drizzle it's ok.

I have nothing of interest to report, only that next appointment is 19 aug and my counselling appointment will be straight after for an hr. no idea what to expect, bit scared.

How's everyone doing?

Fancies40Winks Wed 07-Aug-13 20:34:24

I haven't got anything to say either.

Fancies40Winks Wed 07-Aug-13 20:35:21

I do keep posting too soon.

rasp it is ok and normal to be scared but you'll be fine, promise.

FizzyFeet Wed 07-Aug-13 20:41:55

Tis quiet. My excuse is that work is a bit bonkers at the moment. I agree that we need new blood!

Rasp don't be scared of the counselling. I hope it's a positive experience. I never went back to the one I was referred to on the NHS - I just found him a bit infuriating and he could only do work-hours. But I'm planning to sign up for a research project when we start the IVF which will consist of being interviewed after all appointments which, thought it won't be counselling per se, might at least be a structured way to talk about it all.

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 07-Aug-13 20:51:52

I hope so, I need the help. I'm more and more nervous about the whole thing now. Probably because realistically we are only about 4 weeks away from starting, maybe even sooner depending on droid. I'm peeing on ov sticks this month just so I know roughly when I might have to start. Saying that I've missed the last two days

eurochick Wed 07-Aug-13 22:21:11

My work is a bit crazy too. Also, we are chatting more on t'other place, so I guess there is less to say here.

fizzy that sounds interesting.

rasp the waiting is the worst bit. It's much easier once you get going.

Bearfacedchic Thu 08-Aug-13 00:40:24

<strokes Winks and Drizz with some pumpernickel> <no fishy joy to hand> hope you are both bearing up okay. Same to Twink2 as well.

Hello- been gallumphing round the hills of Germany for the last week, singing sings from The Sound of Music yes, I know it's set in a different country and pretending yo be Heidi, but have been thinking of you all and just read from page 18. I'm so sorry that things are generally quite shite for so many BESH at the moment. Here's hoping for an upward turn soon.

I've got the letter for my HSG. Brickin' it, but got to be done I guess. Apparently, they're happy that I ov regularly, so I'm having blood tests redone too. confused GS going back for SA too. And so the ball begins to slowly roll.

Bearfacedchic Thu 08-Aug-13 00:43:16

<finds Cod of Comfort in suitcase and hands it out with hunks of bread, ham and cheese, and launches gherkins>

RaspberrySnowCone Thu 08-Aug-13 07:30:55

Sorry for droid Hest. I swear there is a psychological link between POAS and it then arriving. Happens every time for me.

I'm enjoying my week off waaaaaay to much, in going to hate going back to work.

At least the ball is rolling Bear but yes, it really does roll very slowly to start with. Especially as it takes bloody weeks to get some appointments in the diary.

eurochick Thu 08-Aug-13 10:18:41

bear the HSG is really fine. I was nervous about it, having read some horror stories on the internet, but it was just like a smear test with a bigger audience! I didn't even know they had put the fluid through until they told me it was done. I had some very faint cramps after (much milder than period pain), sent KFZK to work and walked the mile or so home from the hospital.

FriendofDorothy Thu 08-Aug-13 10:23:06

I found the HSG OK too. The only slightly painful bit was when they put the dye through and it was like a cramping but stopped very quickly.

evilgiraffe Thu 08-Aug-13 10:29:23

Mine too - no big deal at all during the procedure. I was quite wobbly, tearful, and rather crampy afterwards, though, so I skipped work for the afternoon and went and had tea and cake and cuddles with HOTB instead.

The ball does roll SO slowly. My HSG was March-April ish 2012, and we're only just starting IVF #1 this month. However NHS funding is not something to complain about, so I am just being ungrateful.

Bearfacedchic Thu 08-Aug-13 10:47:37

Thanks for the reassurance. I'm sure it will be fine and maybe I need a bit of clearing out there anyway. I never was one for spring cleaning!

FriendofDorothy Thu 08-Aug-13 11:10:40

Hmmm. I got pregnant straight after my HSG. Just saying. Think it was like colonic.

OhBuggerMe Thu 08-Aug-13 11:19:18

I feel slightly left out as I've never had one.

I'm working from home today and I'm so unbelievably tired due to lack of sleep. Every night for the last week I've been awake for 2 hours each night and had crazy vivid dreams. Droid is due tomorrow and I'm 100% sure I'm not pregnant. Tonight I am doing nothing, nada except having a bath and watching crappy tv.

HesterShaw Thu 08-Aug-13 11:29:20

Some people get pregnant straight away afterwards. Lots of people don't.