Ttc#2 secondary infertility?

(38 Posts)
dildoos Sat 15-Jun-13 07:16:29

Please join me for fertility idea swaps, cake eating, woe is me chats hmmand general company and sanity saving x

dildoos Sat 15-Jun-13 07:20:20

I will start the thread withsmile
Dildoos- 32 ,dp 30, dd5,ttc cycle 26, 3 mc in past year, fed up? Tick!

I have paid and seen specialist as cannot get help as have dd, his advice keep on trying and take aspirin when pregnant again!

Hope I have company soon x

FingersCrossedLegsNot Sun 16-Jun-13 15:04:13

Hi dildoos

Unfortunately (iykwim) I'm in a position to join you wink

My stats.....

Fingerscrossedlegsnot 29, dh 36, ds 7, ttc cycle 28, 2 chem preg in past year, fed up? Tick, tick oh and tick!!!

FingersCrossedLegsNot Sun 16-Jun-13 15:11:42

It's so depressing though, especially when every month that goes by I worry about the gap getting bigger and bigger between my ds and any other dc we are likely to get. At this stage I'm starting to worry that there will never be any more dc for us and that just kills me.

Have you been diagnosed with anything? Had you trouble ttc your first?
My ds was a total surprise in my last year of uni blush but I thank my lucky stars every day that I had that surprise.

I have been diagnosed with pcos. My biggest problem being that I don't ovulate. At Christmas I finally got into the gynae clinic (on public systems in Ireland) I was put on clomid which resulted in two chemical pregnancies, I was devastated. I was then put on femara which was supposed to make me ovulate but not thin out my lining like the clomid. It was a disaster and has not worked at all.

So right now I am waiting for my AF to arrive sometime next week and I don't really know what to do. My next appointment is in August but I am thinking of going private.

Have you had your bloods done yet?

FingersCrossedLegsNot Sun 16-Jun-13 15:12:52

Oh gosh that was a long post...sorry. Oh and just for vanity reasons can I point out that from my stats it should say that I am 28 not 29!!! Yes I'm vain.

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 17:25:00

Hey fingers crossed
Sorry you find yourself with me! I am 32 dd5 and dp 30, this is 26 th cycle but 3 mc in this. Time! Fed up fed up fed up booooooohoooooooconfusedconfusedconfusedconfused
However not giving up I refuse smile
It's so frustrating hey? First took 3 years ttc with first partner . My dp has low count and been adv by gynaecologist aspirin when I fall problem is I haven't since his visit damn!!!! Sorry to hear your having trouble too have you any next steps? X

boredoftrying Sun 16-Jun-13 17:30:38

Can I join you?

My stats are: Me 34, DH 43, DS 4 years 9 months. Tried for ds for 3 years (unexplained), currently on cycle 54 (unexplained) and I've had enough!!!

FingersCrossedLegsNot Sun 16-Jun-13 17:54:31

Next step with me will more than likely be a laparoscopy and also changing to go private.

Boredoftrying (great username btw) welcome, are you receiving any treatment? It must be very frustrating to be unexplained.

boredoftrying Sun 16-Jun-13 18:30:36

Fingers crossed: I have had a years worth of Clomid which didn't do much, it made me ovulate earlier (Day 14 whereas I'm always day 17/18) but that was it. I shouldn't have even had it for a year but my consultant said it wouldn't do any harm and he didn't know what else to do!

I've had two laparoscopies, a HSG, a hysteroscopy and a couple of scans but everything was fine. They found some extremely mild endo during the lap but hardly enough to make any difference. It's so hard because I am constantly told that nothing is wrong but I feel like screaming that something but be wrong otherwise I would be pregnant!!

I would have IVF tomorrow but my DH isn't up for it at all, he has two children aged 16 and 20 from his previous marriage so isn't as devastated by this as I am.

Hopefully you will get your laparoscopy and that will show something fixable, for some reason I always hope that they find something they can fix rather than find nothing at all and you still have no answers.

Dildoos do they have any other plans for you other than just take Asprin?

My age gap is getting bigger than I ever wanted but I don't care anymore I just want another one!

It's so nice to chat to other people about it smile

Totesamazeballs Sun 16-Jun-13 19:25:36

I need to join too ladies. I am TTC#2, and this is the sixth month but I have also discovered that I don't ovulate. Not sure why yet and didn't have this issue pre DC1. It's starting to grate when people ask me when we are having number 2.

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 19:52:39

Hey girls welcome welcome welcome! Come get mighty cross with us!!
Bored that's a lot of investigation so can imagine your frustrations!!!! No suggested nothing more for me at the moment except aspirin but don't seem to be getting a snifter of a bfp to try it grrrrrrrrrr!
My sil has 8 month old and up diffed again so I could cry all day everyday why not me too hmm!
I feel a weight lifted having lovely ladies to chat to and share thoughts, feelings and tips with!

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 19:53:26

Totes - what will they do with the lack of ovulation would clinic help you? What say you bored? Xxxx

Totesamazeballs Sun 16-Jun-13 19:58:19

Hi, well, we weren't getting anywhere fast with GPs, being told that we should do OPKs for 3 months before coming back...because its 12 months before you can seek help ( even tho two consecutive months of bloods said no ovulation ) so we went privately and need to do some scans to find out what's going on.

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 20:05:09

Who have gone with? We decided Bourn hall in Cambridge , we had our first consultation near home and to try the aspirin thing , if I don't get another bfp as have had 3 mc will have another appointment to discuss ? Icsi but at mo see pointless as would mc?! ESP as £6000 a try hmm.
Do you think you may ovulate late in month? Do you have regular periods etc? Do you have any signs of ovulation? X

Totesamazeballs Sun 16-Jun-13 20:42:03

Ugh, sounds awful Dil, just awful to go through 3. Have you had any analysis of why you are miscarrying? I had a missed MC and it turned out to be a genetic issue that was a one off, freaky thing. I went privately to find that out but I am glad I did.

I am seeing someone in London who is excellent. I do have regular periods, tonnes of EWCM and I did a dodgy bit of temp tracking which seemed to indicate a temp rise on day 18 of a 25 day cycle. I also tend to get OV pain on day 18 but my progesterone tests said no OV and OPKs also said no OV. Consultant thinks I might be overcooking the egg and not releasing. Who knows. Perhaps I have developed PCOS?

Totesamazeballs Sun 16-Jun-13 20:45:01

Oh, and I hear you about the money!

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 20:53:34

Keep us posted totes- that sounds reasonable the explanation it not heard of over cooking before! However what these docs can do is amazing! Sorry to hear of your mc too . The last one my hog took 8 weeks too return to normal ? Yet no signs of an embryo so got a bit frustrated and cross with myself in end. Xxx

Totesamazeballs Sun 16-Jun-13 21:15:49

Don't be cross with yourself, although I know it's easily done. I blamed myself for my MC which is why we needed to find out why it happened. In fact, I blame myself for not being able to conceive now...I wonder if I lost too much weight through stress ( we had a stressy situation a few months after Dc was born and an illness)...or not eating well enough or whatever. You know? It's hard not to feel like a failure and get frustrated and go though the self pitying 'why me?' Cycle!

dildoos Sun 16-Jun-13 21:24:26

Totes- totally understand that whole cycle! I guess as we house the babies we feel responsible and it's because we are so in tune with our cycles we can never get away from all the stress. Are you eating a balanced diet now? I am just normal weight , a balanced diet although you know it could be better but need treats, I dong smoke I drink but socially grin what else can we do? Xx

Hyland Sun 16-Jun-13 22:15:09

Hi can I ask what the aspirin is for ( never heard of that being recommended before)

dildoos Mon 17-Jun-13 13:05:59

Better blood flows tops clotting ESP in first few weeks xx

Totesamazeballs Mon 17-Jun-13 19:05:31

Weight- wise I would say I am normal now - slap bang in the middle of the bmi chart for my height and like you, I eat OK...I have a weakness for dark chocolate and my tastes have changed a lot since pregnancy. I am pescatarian now and not too keen on acidic fruit. Bizarre. I lived on apples before, but rarely touch them now.

argylesocks Mon 17-Jun-13 19:52:52

Hi, can I jump in with a question? We're on month 7 of TTC #2.

How did you find out you weren't ovulating? I've done the opk and always got a smiley face but that doesn't prove you're actually ovulating right? So how can you tell? Thanks!

dildoos Mon 17-Jun-13 21:02:42

Welcome argyle I had a blood test at 21 days at gp I ovulate but i know that's one of many ways! But a few ladies here maybe able to help!
Totes how bizarre with the acidic fruits thing? Pregnancy does weird things to us xx

Totesamazeballs Tue 18-Jun-13 08:45:11

Hi, mine was a blood test too at 21 days, and plus I didn't get a smiley face on the OPKs. If you get a smiley face then it's ok. I didn't think you could get one without ovulating as the LH surge which they detect is what tells your body to release the egg.

dildoos Tue 18-Jun-13 08:59:57

Totes that's what I thought too, I know you can get the surge and not release egg every month am assuming this would be then what they find with bloods? Someone also adv I should have bloods taken a various points of cycle for more accuracy but didn't really understand and worried that sometimes too much knowledge would be as for megrinxx

dildoos Tue 18-Jun-13 09:47:18

Feeling fed up today another bfp from another friend very close and she will be a wonderful mum and thinking why not me hmm is this fate? X

Hyland Tue 18-Jun-13 11:10:56

Yea I'm pretty sure I read that a smiley face doesn't mean u definitely ovulating .... Just something about how that's when u normally would but it can still not be released after all.... All very confusing... At least a smiley face is half way there, but not sure how we can be certain it's actually happening

Hyland Tue 18-Jun-13 11:15:55

I now know of three other friends trying to conceive and know its only a matter of time before they announce their good news, whilst I smile and say how lovely and then sink into my void ... Of GREAT just me again then... I even know one friend who is somewhat larger than most who also been trying for a longtime and would joke that perhaps she would adopt a monkey lol. I was thrilled for her when she finally fell and sue to pop in the next two weeks. Just don't want my journey to be a long one or a pointless one

Hyland Tue 18-Jun-13 11:20:50

I have a question my window of dtd is withing the next 7 days I think but I'm due to take a course of antibiotics, will this be safe when ttc or would it harm the baby if I was lucky enough to concieve

Totesamazeballs Tue 18-Jun-13 12:45:36

Oh, I didn't realise that about the LH surge and not OV. Blood tests are pretty accurate, or, for the most accurate test, do follicle tracking where they scan you at various points in your cycle and see what is going on.

I am afraid I don't know about the antibiotics, maybe ask the GP?

Sorry Dil and Hyland. Both of your feelings chime, particularly, the 'just me again' as it starts to feel like that. Sometimes I think I really have to fight for what I want and be patient which I am not good at being, but when I get them they are worth the wait.

Empathy hugs to you both smile

dildoos Tue 18-Jun-13 13:22:15

Sorry hyland your feeling these things today too hmm totes thanks for the hugs in turn they are returned! Xx

argylesocks Tue 18-Jun-13 14:21:42

Thanks for the replies, If there's still no luck this month I'll see if I can get some bloods done though they'll probably say its too early!

Hyland Tue 18-Jun-13 16:08:20

Dildoos ur very kind, wishing u and all of u on here a quick fall in ttc and sending u all positive vibes, it's just hard when u realise another month I've failed. And then all the hype in the days leading to ovulating and then the 2 week wait that u prey this time will be eventful lol

I tried to use my own advise of being positive and purchased two books about pregnancy for men (expectant dads survival guide - everything u need to know...& From birth to 3 years old) ...... I thought if I concentrate on planning how I would tell my partner the good news it will give me something to look forward to. Silly but I read once something about time travel and if I concentrate on the end result then everything in the middle will be very quick... Worth a try !

dildoos Tue 18-Jun-13 19:55:36

Thank you hyland and I wish for you the same smile
That sounds like a good plan! I have not been to positive recently so maybe pinch your idea and give it a whirl but may try reflexology again? How's you feeling at the mo?
How is everyone else doing?
Xxx

Hyland Sun 23-Jun-13 18:50:16

Had some wisdom teeth taken out, so feel like that has got in the way of dtd so feeling a bit fed up

dildoos Sun 23-Jun-13 19:32:05

I am a dental nurse hyland grin so right place to feel you can chat about either end wink
I do vaguely remember when i fell with dd I was blush as thought only did once and lord only bows when in cycle! Maybe the times you have managed Dtd will have been successful!
The witch got me good and proper today angrysad
However thinking of doing ov tests this month, what's your experience with these? X

Hyland Sun 23-Jun-13 21:23:10

Your a dental nurse lol i'm a big scaredy cat lol ..I had to go to hospital for the surgery under anaesthetic, thought I wouldn't need the following day off work ... Turnt I needed the whole week. I'm pretty sure we haven't done it during those ideal days so feeling glum (who would want to do it with someone who seems ill - from pain and can't talk properly and mouth still swollen and still taking a lot of pain killers lol)

Ov test are expensive .... Perhaps look on eBay. My first couple of times I wasn't even getting a smiley face (this was using a pack of 7) then I bough a bigger pack and tested for longer than they said which finally got my first smiley face and its true what they say ( it's almost as heartbreaking not getting that smiley face than not getting the positive on preg test) I do think it will give I an idea on when u ovulate and perhaps repeat the following month in case ur one of those who don't ovulate the same time every month.

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