The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

(985 Posts)
HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:18:12

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

Northey Fri 19-Apr-13 22:24:18

Relax, you say? Don't mind if I do. I might even give AMNH a sensual massage with candles oo er. Forgetting all about it and having a moment of pure lurve is bound to work.

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Apr-13 22:26:25

Yeah! <shakes fist> <spills gin>

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:29:18

Oh yes. And if anyone says "You need to relax! My aunty's hairdresser's cousin's cleaner had 3 rounds of IVF and then got pregnant NATURALLY when she went on holiday!" we won't be answerable for our actions.

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Apr-13 22:34:02

And the "well if it doesn't work you can always adopt" ignorant fuckers can fuck off, too.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Apr-13 22:38:09

<makes self at home>

<crosses fingers and makes a wish>

Am I pregnant yet? wink

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:38:47

<throws some babydust at Frank>

Probably hun.

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:38:58

Have you BDed lately?

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Apr-13 22:44:09

Don't even joke about "BD", hest, some of us have been sick more than enough this week already...

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Apr-13 22:46:16

Anyone seen the Conception Prediction thread? hmm

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:46:20

Sorry my love hag.

I am watching Graham Norton. Mo Farrah sat between Lee Mack and Gwyneth Paltrow. I love this show. Mo has barely heard of Gwynnie, let alone Lee Mack. He spends all his day running.

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 22:46:45

Conception prediction? I don't like the way this is sounding....

evilgiraffe Fri 19-Apr-13 23:05:43

I've not seen the thread, but it sounds hilarious.

Mo Farah is one of my personal sporting heroes - such a huge talent and such a nice guy! Who the fuck is Lee Mack?

HesterShaw Fri 19-Apr-13 23:19:24

He's a comedian! He's funny and I think sexy in a weird way but his sitcom is so to curlingly bad, I can't forgive him it.

Nokkie73 Fri 19-Apr-13 23:25:33

I think lee mack is quite fit. I confessed this to my friends and they basically paraded me through the streets shouting 'unclean.....unclean'.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 19-Apr-13 23:30:17

Lee Mack was a stable lad at Ginger McCain's yard and sat on Red Rum <troo fact>

The thread is odd and has strangely angered me. Someone has found an online clairvoyant who will predict for you when you will conceive, and take £5 off you in the process. I just think it's a blatant exploitation of emotionally vulnerable women.

CaptainMoll Fri 19-Apr-13 23:49:36

Evenin' 'ags
<doffs cap>
<hangs up coat>
<pours self an ale>
<sits in old armchair by roaring fire>
<lights pipe>

HadALittleFaithBaby Fri 19-Apr-13 23:52:36

<marks spot> vairy naice new home laydees.

Nokkie73 Fri 19-Apr-13 23:59:05

faif forgot to say congrats on the sproggins. Hope all is well with you both. Xx

cap'n wossin your pipe ?

CaptainMoll Sat 20-Apr-13 00:15:39

<embarrassed cough>

Nokkie73 Sat 20-Apr-13 00:18:35

Has the captain been a naughty seadweller grin ?

CaptainMoll Sat 20-Apr-13 01:00:17

<brandishes cutlass>
Me? Nope.

FriendofDorothy Sat 20-Apr-13 08:07:56

<wanders in with pompoms and sits down to wait>

EuroShaggleton Sat 20-Apr-13 08:11:47

Morning hags!

Today is very eggciting. I had my first string of EWCM today in about two years. Maybe the mc has reset something. Or maybe not trying last month has helped me to relax.... (so clearly it is bound to happen now). Either that or it was beer. I had beer last night, for the first time in AGES.

Right, better go and pack.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 20-Apr-13 08:38:32

<adds beer to list of "TTC Must Haves>

Nokkie73 Sat 20-Apr-13 12:29:45

euro it's definitely beer. Where is it this time then ? Somewhere nice and hot and exotic ? I am glad you have been given the go-ahead, even though your appointment sounded like a colossal waste of time. You feeling a bit more chilled hungover ?

hest how are you ? I was sorry to hear of your woes love. X

cap'n you old drunken sea um....well the next word here is dog, but that's a bit rude, even for a potty mouthed harridan like my good self. I bet you have a hangover this morning grin.

Moons at everyone else.

I cannot believe what a lovely day it is today. Normally the weather is a bag of shit, so this makes a nice change. I am going to Ronnie Scott's tomorrow for Ma Noks' birthday. Skee dap diddly bap baps and jazz hands all round. The last time I went, I have never seen so many stupidly coloured trousers on so many old people in one room in my life. The music was ace though.

EuroShaggleton Sat 20-Apr-13 13:07:39

Nowhere that exotic, noks - just the mothership office in the US. But one of the lovely 10+ers lives in the city I'm going to, so we are meeting up tomorrow. This'll be our third meeting now.

Ronnie Scotts sounds ace. You'll have to do a stupid trouser tally and report back.

hest how are you doing today?

We had another sechsfail this morning, so my first EWCM in two years won't get us anywhere. That's our third in a row and means we haven't dtd since pre-mc. This has never happened before. Unfortunately, that means no chance of an FCFU and we're back in the hands of the clinic. sad I was horny as hell too.

FriendofDorothy Sat 20-Apr-13 13:58:59

In my family we call brightly coloured trousers 'millionaire trousers' as that seems to be what rich old men wear.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 20-Apr-13 14:51:29

Nice new fred, hags! Well done hes.

Beer you say euro. Well that is on the list then. About to join SB and some friends in a beer garden so I shall partake of some. Lovely weather here and it is weekend! So sorry about the fail, and no sechsing since pre-MC that is shit. It took us a little while to get back on the horse afters...

Waves at the others! Noks did you arrive while I was gone to the fabuloustest hols in a long while?

Congrats on escaping the clutches of the hossie, faif.

HadALittleFaithBaby Sat 20-Apr-13 16:31:49

Must be the beer euro. Now the deadline is done (well done by the way!) I prescribe regular intake along with the sechs.

Life here is very strange, trying to establish a routine. Faithlet is beautiful but very hard work! BF is going well and the MW who saw her today was happy with her progress smile

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Sat 20-Apr-13 17:45:26

Afternoon hags.

I am watching the Sex Clinic. I am shocked, and I am not a prude!!

Well done on the new fred Hest - When do you POAS?

Nokkie73 Sat 20-Apr-13 18:01:27

euro well make sure you take care of yourself and have a good trip. At least you have someone outside of work you can hang about with. Make sure you drink beer too. Sorry about the sechs fail too. It will get better. X

dot that's a fucking brilliant name for those trousers. They have SO much cash, they literally couldn't give a rats crap about looking like a total twat.

drizz I did sneak in. I did the questionnaire and everything. Where did you go on hollibobs ? I love a good one, me. Shame I have no money to go on one though. Poor fucking me. grin

bugs I gave that a miss he other day as it sounded a bit tame from the description. I was clearly misled. Do share with the group !

Noks xx

HadALittleFaithBaby Sat 20-Apr-13 20:57:07

So sorry euro, missed that you'd had a sechs fail. Hang in there.

I'm just watching more Pride and prejudice (which I started watching last week!) while having snuggles.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 21-Apr-13 17:52:08

Where do I sign up for sainthood? This weekend I assembled a crib for a very diffed friend, bought and sent two new-babies presents and have just been to visit the newest arrival born to two lesbian friends of ours.

Welcome noks. I missed your sneaking and might hunt your beshtionaire but not yet. I am lemon, was in the far east enjoying raw fish and alcohol for much of the last month, have been TTC forever (3yrs in June), unexplained, got diffed last summer from SO+IUI, mc in Sept. Been waiting increasingly frustrated since then.

Enjoy it faif. Sounds bliss. Btw, the baybee we saw today was only 10 days old and the mums did look like truck had run over them. The little boy looked totally at peace. So even if all goes really well, this period seems hard work.

DolomitesDonkey Sun 21-Apr-13 17:58:01

Millionaire trousers also attract gazillionaires. Friend of ours used to wear red jeans. Not a great look for a middle-aged computer programmer. Met a 40 year old virgin online and married her. One of the richest families in the country. The git. I did Internet dating and landed a pauper. In normal trousers.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sun 21-Apr-13 18:09:29

Evening hags, I had a very productive morning - mowed the lawn and washed the cars. I intended to work on my college assignment this afternoon, but I've been on the sofa since 2pm and can't be arsed to move grin

Glad you are enjoying the snuggles Faithy.

I spoke to the clinic yesterday, the nurse said she would talk to the Dr and they would probably send me some tablets to induce droid. Only problem is we're less than 4 weeks away from our trip to New York. There's a risk that this cycle's fertile time might clash with the trip and I won't be getting scanned. Stoopid body. All I want is a bit of regularity! Is that too much to ask????

My BF came over for a girls night last night. We ate pizza and drank wine. T'was bliss!

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 21-Apr-13 19:43:20

frank that's a real nuisance.

I have been surrounded by babies, and people talking about their babies, all weekend. I am emotionally exhausted. I am also physically exhausted from doing the London tourist bit with a friend who was visiting, airport runs, & an actual run.

HesterShaw Sun 21-Apr-13 19:43:23

What a monstrous PITA, Frank.

I wish I could have girlfriend over. Without trying to sound pafetic, mine all all many miles away, and my friends round here don't stretch to wine round each others' houses.

I have always maintained that having children is good for your social life. Even if you don't have a massive amount in common with the women you make friends with at antenatal etc, there are probably bound to be some you get one with ok. The barren miss all that, especially if you move to a new area. My mum hotly denies this, conveniently ignoring the fact that some of her still-closest friends she made through us kids.

HesterShaw Sun 21-Apr-13 19:44:34

But on the plus, I am going to have a glass of wine tonight.

My life is a series of longings at the moment - longings for the two cups of proper tea I am permitting myself a day, and the twice weekly glasses of wine grin. I wish I knew whether it was worth it.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sun 21-Apr-13 19:46:50

Hang on in there Hesty. What is your gut telling you?

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 21-Apr-13 19:54:13

What type of wine will you be having hest? You must be nearly at POAF day by now surely?

I am very nervous about my first day on a new team, in a new role tomorrow. Also I have to be in for 5.30am shock

HesterShaw Sun 21-Apr-13 20:12:39

Pinot grigio. Mmmmmmmmmm.

POAF will be either next Friday or Monday. It's supposed to be Saturday (16 days post-basting) but we have a wedding that day, and staying at BIL's house, so I don't fancy doing it there. Or the next day when we're still there. They said if it's negative on the Saturday, do it again on the Monday just to check. Maybe doing it on the Friday, it being negative and then me going on a massive bender at the wedding would be a Bad Idea.

5.30??????????????????????????????????? shock

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 21-Apr-13 20:51:51

Good luck twinks hope the new role is good, although can it be at 5:30am hmm

Pissed here, a bottle of very nice wine after all the baby viewing and assembling of baby furniture. And a good chat with SB. Sadly disturbed by his parents, so waiting for him to get of the phone. We were halfway through a real conversation, trouble on the ILside of things. So boring...

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 21-Apr-13 20:52:36

Btw everything crossed for the fiver peeing, hes. Fwiw I peed on 15dpo with my positive. So Friday seems late enough.

JethroTull Sun 21-Apr-13 21:33:19

5.30??? Twinks that is a horrid time of day to start a new job. Good luck.

Loving the millionaire trousers. We call them 'wealth pants' & they are usually red or bright yellow. Accompanied by a tweed jacket.

Sorry for sechs fail Euro. Be kind to yourself, you've had a horrid time & have been working like a Trojan to boot.

Nice Fred btw Hest

HesterShaw Sun 21-Apr-13 22:22:32

Ah fuck it all. I know I'm not diffed. I haven't gone off caffeine, alcohol, don't have the metal taste, don't have anything. I may as well get wasted at the wedding. I'll test on Friday.

Northey Sun 21-Apr-13 22:32:27

Tempt fate. It's the only way.

HesterShaw Sun 21-Apr-13 22:41:59

And I'm still not feeling the love for decaffeinated tea.

Northey Sun 21-Apr-13 22:53:13

No indeed. I have learnt to cope with decaf coffee, but decaf tea was utterly beyond me.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 01:53:13


Why does the bugger BREATHE so damn loudly eh?

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Mon 22-Apr-13 07:14:40

Prod in the ribs is the only thing I find that works. Aversion Therapy I call it wink

Have you tried Redbush Tea? I get on quite well with that and it's naturally decafinated, rather than being regular tea with the good stuff sucked out!

I'm debating starting Couch to 5k. I feel like a blob now that the warmer weather is here, but I'm not a big fan of running. I've fallen out of love with Jillian - haven't done the 30 Day Shred for a few months.


JethroTull Mon 22-Apr-13 07:19:53

Hest I had NO symptoms. Zero. None. Nothing. Except insomnia.... grin

JethroTull Mon 22-Apr-13 07:22:06

Frank I'm a fan of the Redbush tea. Although I only rate the Tick Tock brand. The others taste a bit weird.

Jogging is your answer. Fastest way to shed a few pounds. Walking / jogging is as effective too.

Northey Mon 22-Apr-13 07:26:34

I have just started running again, frankel, after several years off. It's not as bad as I had feared it would be, actually, and even though the scales are very meanly not shifting, my trousers are looser and my face looks thinner.

hest, I couldn't sleep either. AMNH was just Too Hot.

After a week of spotting, i am leaking lots of matt brown liquid. Doesn't really resemble droid to me, but there is so much of it I guess it must be.

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Apr-13 07:38:34

Norf - hope that sorts itself out into something recognisable soon. When I was briefly on the pill, my periods were always a lot like that..

8 DPO here and temp still well above average - I'm going to stop temping now and try and put it out of my mind. Not a single other symptom, so maybe it's just the warm weather.hmm

Hest, really hope that's a sign of good things, like what Jeffers said hinted..

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Apr-13 08:20:43

I can't tell the difference between real tea and decaf tea <heathen> I drink a lot of fruit teas, though, which are a good way of limiting caffeine intake - peppermint and liquorice is a current favourite of mine. Redbush tea is revolting, though, you might as well just put sick in a mug and drink that.

Today I feel more human, I slept all night! No waking up due to my digestive system, so perhaps I may be well again...

evilgiraffe Mon 22-Apr-13 08:21:41

And fingers crossed, Hest. You never know until droid or POAS, so hang on in there.

HadALittleFaithBaby Mon 22-Apr-13 09:22:58

My only symptoms were exaggerated PMS! Tired, vile mood, very front with MSB...the caffiene aversion didn't kick in til after the BFP. <hands hest the cod of comfort>

Hope the new job is going well Twink..

Glad you slept well draf.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 10:41:14

I am always in a vile mood though <reasonable>

alwyn Mon 22-Apr-13 11:16:08

Pliz to be crossing fingers for me, BESH. I have just had a job interview for somewhere that looks AMAZING to work, that is super kid-friendly (if we EVER get there) and has a really supportive boss.

<hands out cod slaps to those who need it>

EuroShaggleton Mon 22-Apr-13 11:23:56

Morning hags! It's 6am here and I have already been awake for an hour and a half.... Grrr

Had more beer last night. More Ewcm this morning. It's bizarre. I thought my body had just given up making it due to age. Beer is clearly the answer. Whatever is the question.

Hest, like jeff, my only early symptom was insomnia...

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Apr-13 11:41:37

Hest, I think I'll be POAF on Friday morning too.

Just in case there's a Lurkin' Merkin - hoping your TFP is turning into a nice sticky BFP.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 11:57:02

Shall we piss together?

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Apr-13 12:01:49

A new sport! Synchronised sWeeming!

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Mon 22-Apr-13 12:50:26

"Shall we piss together?" grin Blunt and to the point, eh Hesty wink

Yes, where is Merkin? I have my tassles on stand by!

Spoke to the clinic again, a round of drugs is on it's way. The nurse has recommended that I time taking them so that droid arrives just after we get back from New Yoik <attempts Brooklyn accent>. She said that the clinic could give me a Drs letter confirming that I'm carrying medication (ie syringes) but the real issue is that the drucks need to be kept cool.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 22-Apr-13 16:22:26

Hags I had a luffly day at work smile

moll I am not menkulling on your behalf, nope. I was thinking about you when I was in LondonTown on Saturday evening though.

norf hope your maybe-droid sorts itself out. Well done on the looser trousers, today I wore my uniform trousers for the first time in 2 years and they had a bit of a gastic band effect.

hest when I briefly gave up caffeine at the start of the year it was torture at first, but I got used to it fairly quickly. It only went to (tea)pot when my tea addicted parents came to stay.

4am is an early up time. I am tired.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 16:30:12

Glad work was good. It needed to be after that early start.

I am having an awful work day. I'm trying to organise a meeting between several local companies who are, naturally, business rivals. But because this is such a small industry, we are mostly friends as well. Apart from two of them who are trying to sabotage everything I am trying to achieve. We have made a lot of strides in the last few months in the realms of sharing data, devising a joint code of conduct and so on, and two of them are doing their best to discredit it all e.g. one of them us claiming he has never received any of the emails and he has been purposefully targeted and excluded and is telling all the relevant NGOs he is involved with, whereas his name is there in black and white on the CC list. And yet I am supposed to remain polite to this twunt and keep gushing "No we really want you to be part of it. We really value your input," when all I want to do is tell him to find a cliff and do a running jump of it. He causes nothing but trouble.

alwyn Mon 22-Apr-13 18:24:58


HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 18:29:00

Succinct and to the point, alwyn. He is indeed a nobber.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 22-Apr-13 18:45:08

hest just hit him with a big stick.

Hi al, I have my fingers crossed for you.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 18:48:51

Me too. That job sounds like an improvement.

I always thought I might have stayed in teaching if I'd been able to find a job in a lovely school. The best of British.

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Apr-13 19:05:59

<hands Hest a mighty barge poke for the walloping>
<crosses fingers for Alwyn>
Thanks for the not-menkulling, Twink. I feel remarkably calm about it tbh. I think it's cos I have no symptoms beyond higher temps, which meant something until I woke up with tonsillitis. I've now decided its just me being under the weather, but will dutifully pee on the old queens face on Friday anyway, just for larks.

CaptainMoll Mon 22-Apr-13 19:06:24

* barge POLE

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Mon 22-Apr-13 20:11:40

Keeping everything crossed for the fivers on Friday. Otherwise I am knackered and sleepy...

Northey Mon 22-Apr-13 20:12:25

Arf at peeing on the old queen's face. And i speak as one quite fond of the monarchy. Can POTOQF be our new acronym? I sometimes worry we are losing our impenetrability.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 22-Apr-13 20:36:13

In what way Norfolk?

Northey Mon 22-Apr-13 20:51:16

Well maybe not impenetrability. More just that we are forgetting our BESHly heritage and not creating any more. I need a journey and a legacy. Because I like shit reality telly and so have come to expect these things. Or maybe I am talking shit.

HesterShaw Mon 22-Apr-13 21:55:19

norf - you are talking shit. Just to clarify grin

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Tue 23-Apr-13 11:51:52

Quiet in BESH land today!

<watches tumbleweed>

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Apr-13 13:07:32

Alright, riddle me this, BESHes: I never ever get EWCM, ever. So why today (CD15) do I have EWCM - not much, granted, but that is more than usual - complete with fetching brown streaks? I don't generally get spotting between droids either, but this is the third random day of spotting since droid finished - and droid actually lasted a normal length of time (six days bleeding, two days spotting) for the first time since last July. Granted, last week's stomach bug was horrific, but it shouldn't make any that much difference, surely?

I am confused! confused

HesterShaw Tue 23-Apr-13 14:06:46

You're laying an egg. Shag immediately.

EuroShaggleton Tue 23-Apr-13 15:26:38

Wot hest sed, draf.

Maybe it's the month of random EWCM? Having not had any for almost two years, I am practically drowning in the stuff at the moment. And half a world away from KFZK. What cr@p timing.

merk what's occuring?

I went to the gym this morning for the first time since I was preggers. I am very unfit. But I like the gym in Merica. Most people in it have considerably more heft than I do!

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Apr-13 15:46:07

I think it must be, euro, I can think of no rhyme nor reason for it hmm HOTB will be late home tonight, too, grr. Still, with a week of illness-induced abstinence following a week of droid-induced abstinence, he shouldn't be too difficult to seduce grin

CaptainMoll Tue 23-Apr-13 17:15:00

OV bleeding/spotting is A Thing. I've read it before on the internets, so it must be true. grin

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Apr-13 17:40:38

But I never have Things! This is strange and unusual new ground! grin

My neighbours are having a barbecue. WIBU to squawk across several gardens the fence and beg a sausage? I've had to bring my washing in because of it, so fair's fair...

CaptainMoll Tue 23-Apr-13 18:55:29

Well, it's either the squawk option or a well trained Dog/Cat/gerbil who can leap fences..
I want a sausage now.

I am getting persistent stabby aches on my womble's left side. Is this a) paranoia b)englebert lumperdinck growing bigger c) an ectopic pregnancy?

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 23-Apr-13 18:59:36

Votes (a). How are things with englebert lumperdinck anyway?

draf can you not bring some beers and invite yourself?

CaptainMoll Tue 23-Apr-13 19:03:20

Lumperdinck is scheduled for probing and removal on May 14th. He is kinda hurty these days, so I'll be glad to see the back of him.
They're doing the dye job while they're in there.
unless I get preggers first

evilgiraffe Tue 23-Apr-13 19:42:17

I vote (a) too. Stop worrying <slaps mittens with a flounder>

Sausage opportunity has been and gone. HOTB having his tea out, and I can't be arsed to move so am just getting hungrier. Maybe if I get a film out I'll be inspired to cook as I'll then have entertainment planned...

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Tue 23-Apr-13 19:48:01

I have left over risotto to eat. I cooked it on Sunday so I hope it's ok. I'll nuke it in the microwave just to be safe.

CaptainMoll Tue 23-Apr-13 19:51:25

Nuke it good, Frank, you don't want no half-heated rice, that shit is EVIL.

Thanks for the flounder slap, Draf

I am doing a late shift and I am stuck at a desk by myself and all I can think about is CHOCOLATE

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 23-Apr-13 20:06:55

HWCA thinks all rice is evil, I can't remember when I last had risotto. He is currently watching The Hobbit, and I am only just paying attention. I am mostly enjoying the horses dressed up to look like Icelandic ponies.

My first two days at my new job have been great, although I am shattered. I'm on nights on Friday, then have to go get dildocammed on Saturday morning. Fun.

My period tracker suggests I am probably ovulating today. If I did ovulate today, is there any point in trying for a shag in the morning? (Other than that it's fun.) HWCA has been pretty committed to the cause this month but last night and the night before, it's been all clap and no sprinkle, which is unusual... Not that I think I've necessarily ovulated this month.

HesterShaw Tue 23-Apr-13 20:53:57

I like rice.

I like most food, actually.

HesterShaw Tue 23-Apr-13 20:55:04

I think there is point in SWI tomorrow. Sometimes you release two eggs.

Though I can't talk. Sometimes I'm just too lazy to shag.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Tue 23-Apr-13 20:59:07

<has been for a run, just saying>

I vote (a) too and getting pregnant before May 14th as well moll.

Yay for the fabulous new job twink, althought nights combined with dildo-camming sounds foul.

Risotto is LOVELY, when done well. Just so you know. But cold I agree it is a little vile. I just had a sandwich for tea after mental break down cos SB failed to come home - forgot to tell me his activity and then forgot to tell me the volunteering had moved to the pub.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Tue 23-Apr-13 20:59:30

I fancy a shag. Maybe I should shower.

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 23-Apr-13 23:55:28

I'm back in this shitty country ladies, although I'm tempted to turn round and fuck right off out of it again. Came home to my bathroom a complete shit tip because my dad started retiling it and got bored so fucked off, nothing from the hospital and fuck all else well in the world. So tomorrow ill give the house a clean, do some course work then get ready to go back to work in a job that I've got to be honest, I really am not happy in. I want to leave everything behind and never come back. Many tears have fallen this afternoon. Fucking fuck. Oh and mum has ramped her positivity up to me not getting just one baby from IVF-ill get twins??!! What the actual F? I really don't know where to start with all this. I really, really don't.

CaptainMoll Wed 24-Apr-13 06:23:01

Hair strokes, Raspy. That sucks.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 24-Apr-13 07:05:52

<passes cod of comfort to Raspberry>

Sorry you've had to come home to all this deary. Don't work too hard today, be kind to yourself.

I have just returned from my first Couch to 5k run <proud>


<collapses in corner>

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Apr-13 07:55:54

Oh, rasp sad That is a whole pile of crap.

I'm more impressed at the time of your run than the run itself, Frank. I am so completely NOT a morning person.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 24-Apr-13 07:59:12

evil, I have to exercise in the mornings as I have to study when I get in from work. Plus I find it makes me feel more awake for the day ahead!

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 24-Apr-13 08:45:30

I went running before work once, but I run through some wooded areas and nobody had broken the spiders webs between the trees. It was horrifying.

HesterShaw Wed 24-Apr-13 09:57:07

Rasp lovely, you sound like you need a big sleep and a nice cup of tea for starters. Then your dad needs telling that if he starts a job in someone else's house it is generally considered good form to finish it. And remind your mum, as I frequently have to do with mine, that you IVF is your business and someone else regularly asking about it, commenting on it, doesn't help AT ALL. You know she's interested, you know she's concerned, but please can she wait to be told stuff, and you will if you are ready.

Sorry homecoming was shit xxx

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 24-Apr-13 10:07:10

Hear, hear hester. I agree with everything you say.

I have trained nearly everyone on the don't-ask-I'll-tell (or usually won't tell) approach to our fertility-shite. So spell it out for her and any other nosy parkers. It is not helpful, though the concern is nice, it can be given in the form of cookies and wine (or financial IVF support).

Sorry it is all shit rasp. I hope this morning is looking better.

Well done frank on the run. I love your excuse for chickening out of morning runs twink. I ran through some woods post-work for the first time this year (because I had not been out since halfway through March) so that was lovely.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Apr-13 10:08:35

Well said, hest <approving>

alwyn Wed 24-Apr-13 11:04:53

Absolutely what hest said, rasp. Hair strokes for you.

I have secured employment, BESH. I am OVER THE MOON. At lovely workplace with lovely people. Can't bloody wait to start on Monday grin

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 24-Apr-13 11:22:35

I fully agree with what hest said. Sorry things are so crappy rasp.

al that's brilliant news, well done!

HesterShaw Wed 24-Apr-13 13:09:11

Look at everyone agreeing with me! <pleased> I must be Very Wise.

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 24-Apr-13 14:18:30

hello hags and thank you for the supportive messages. I actually feel no better whatsoever. MATV is cross with me for being so stressed, I have text pregnant friend about baby shower but not had a response as yet, if I get one at all. I probably don't deserve one. Spoke to the hospital, they basically said it is out of their hands speak to the funding people.. Rang them, the person in question is still off sick, they don't know who is picking up the work but they gave me a number of a bloke I can speak to but he doesn't answer his phone.

I don't feel any better so I've made an appointment at the drs for next Friday, that will get a week 'back' in normality to get my head straight on what I want to say but it will be along the lines of 'I need help, I'm falling apart'. I think I also need to look for a new job. It's a shame because the extra money is really very nice but I was happy doing what I did before. Mum wants us to go over later and tell Dad what we want doing which seems a bit weird, they must know it will be something along the lines of 'Finish the tiling'. The frustrating thing is it didn't need re-tiling, all it need was a paint, the floor to be tiled (it's only a small space!) and a new roller blind and I would have been very happy! Instead I now have three different have tiled walls/floor, a manky ceiling and manky roller blind but a nicely weeded garden. Probably the least of my issues I know but it's just the icing on the cake really.

Sorry for all me me me, I'll get back into it in a day or two when I've calmed down a bit!

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 24-Apr-13 16:56:16

I give you permission to be as "you you you" as you like <generous>

Seriously though, even without everything else it's dreadful hating work. You have my full sympathy. Jacking in my other role and going back to the one I'm in now was the best decision I ever made. You work for too long to spend it being miserable. Also, MATV is probably acting cross because he's worried, but HWCA did the exact same thing and it was so upsetting. I had to literally yell "I'm not choosing to be stressed, this is something that is happening to me!"

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 24-Apr-13 20:51:36

Thanks Twink. I think I've scared everyone else away! I don't think I've ever sobbed as much as I have today. Had a massive row with MATV so cried at him and then had to go to my parents and sobbed on my mum then I got a lovely text back from baby shower friend saying basically that she completely understood and would I rather do lunch on our own or whatever would be best for me sort of thing so had another cry. I really don't deserve such nice friends! Now I'm all puffy and tired and have to go back to crappy work tomorrow. At least MATV calmed down while I was out and is now being civil again. Men are such strange creatures.

CaptainMoll Wed 24-Apr-13 21:33:09

Oh Rasps, it sounds like you've really been through the wringer today. Sometimes a good bit of full-scale sobbing helps though. I did that the other week after bottling it up for ages and it was such a relief. I hope you get some of the same. UnMNy hugs to you.

Hest, I fear you may be peeing solo on Friday. I got the first faint hint of droidal activity today. I might POTOQF anyway for solidarity. <salutes the BESH flag>
(In my head, the BESH flag is a bit like a Jolly Roger but with skeggy kecks instead of a skull, and crossed pee sticks)

alwyn Wed 24-Apr-13 21:56:04

<strokes rasp's hair gently>

You sound a bit overwhelmed with everything, love. The only problem with holidays is that they allow you to think about the things you refuse to think about day-to-day, like the issue with the clinic, and the fact you're unhappy in your job.

HesterShaw Wed 24-Apr-13 22:41:03

I know we don't do hugs, Rasp, but have one anyway ((((((((())))))))). I think that's the first time I've typed that smile

So to hear that Moll. I have no optimism and feel it's all pointless anyway. But I might as well

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 24-Apr-13 22:55:49

Not long to go now hest. As you say, you might as well.

evilgiraffe Wed 24-Apr-13 23:02:00

Oh, Rasp, I'm sorry things are so hard sad I'm glad you've made a GP appointment, it sounds like a neutral voice (and maybe a referral for counselling?) would be helpful. I sympathise completely on the job front, whenever I look back at 2012 I'm shocked and horrified - getting out has done wonders for my mental health. Until the GP, maybe a fishy hug will help smile

Northey Wed 24-Apr-13 23:49:56

rasper, lovely, I'm sorry everything is a bit mis (massive understatement) sad Going to the GP sounds a very sensible idea - get the help you need in order to start putting yourself back together. Feeling unable to cope is just horrid, and I wish we could all come around and help you. More internetty hugs instead.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Thu 25-Apr-13 06:59:26

Raspberry, I hope you are feeling a little better this morning. Is it worth you also contacting the clinic about counselling? To the best of my knowledge most fertility clinics offer it in one form or another and you may get an appointment quicker than through the GP.

What's your normal LP Hesty, are you feeling droidal at all? Did you have a progesterone test 1 week after IUI to confirm ov? Oh, and can I ave your autograph Miss Big TV Star? wink

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Apr-13 07:57:20

Morning all. Can anyone tell me, when will I learn that tights with shiny pants leads to a day of tights sliding off my bum? Highly annoying.

rasp how are you today?

How is everyone?

CaptainMoll Thu 25-Apr-13 08:05:33

Morning all. Hope you're all waking up to sunshine and nice things, esp Rasp

Alas, Hest, no pee sticks for me. Droid arrived this morning.

I thought the LP was supposed to be the same every time, but mine's all over the place. 9, 14 and 10 days for the 3 cycles that I've managed to chart reliably.

Ah well, bring on the surgery and bye bye Lumperdinck..

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Apr-13 08:08:16

Aw Molly, sorry to hear that. Stupid fucking droid. Bye lumperdinck.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Thu 25-Apr-13 08:13:58

Sorry to hear about droid Moll <drop kicks metal bastard out of thread>

I'm good, no running today as you're supposed to run every other day.

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Apr-13 08:27:42

I might go for a run after work, but my legs are achey - yesterday's horse was a lot more lively and a lot less interested in staying on the track than last week's.

evilgiraffe Thu 25-Apr-13 08:32:26

Aww, sorry, Moll, that sucks.

No news here other than my god it's good to be back on the wagon. Illness-induced celibacy makes me a sad panda. Hurrah for being well!

I'm back on my bicycle too; rode the short loop yesterday in good time, so at least training doesn't appear to have suffered for the time off. I'll go for a longer ride today to test that theory, though...

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 09:55:23

I actually think my natural luteul phase has ended as my boobs were agony a few days ago and now they're fine. It's only the progesterone bullets keeping it at bay now. Wank.

KatAndKit Thu 25-Apr-13 10:07:05

I have everything crossed that you are wrong. I have been stalking for you all week. Not over till the metal fucker bleeps and all that...

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 10:18:39

Thanks Kat, but I really wouldn't bother sad

Why else would the boob pain have gone away?

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 11:02:09

God I'm so miserable. Kate Middleton with her baby bump is all over Tinternet and she still looks utterly beautiful. I look like a sack of shit. Fucking cow. Apparently she got pregnant as soon as they started trying.

I can't cope with this wedding this weekend hags. But I have to. MrHest is an usher sad sad sad sad sad sad sad

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Apr-13 11:09:25

<dumps bucket of scallops and clams over hest's head>

Yes, KM is gawjus. But - it is her job to look lovely. She has all the time and money to devote to it, and yes she is good at her job, just as you are good at yours. There will always be fuckers that diff as soon as they so much as think about sperm, and yes we are as jealous as fuck. However I wouldn't want to be KM, honestly - all that scrutiny, all that criticism - and you wouldn't want to be a walking smiling clothes horse/Royal breeding machine either.

You will go to the wedding and smile until you almost convince yourself, and if you get a BFN in the morning you can get drunk on champagne, and either way come here and regail (?sp) us with stories about the tacky favours/weird guests/cold chicken, and we will give you tea and sympathy, or gin and mild violence as required.

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 11:17:19

Winks that actually made me smile a little bit. So count it as a success smile

Fucking weddings <growls> I won't know anyone at all apart from MrHest, the bride and the groom.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Thu 25-Apr-13 11:54:57

Listen to Twinks she speaks a lot of sense. Plus has the DoC ever shown Rory Bremner what to do on a boat on telwvision? No she has not, so 1-0 Hesty in my view wink

Do you have a stick ready for tomorrow? Gives us an ETP (estimated time of peeing) and we'll all be here to hold your hand.

evilgiraffe Thu 25-Apr-13 14:08:08

There's always a gorgeous instadiffer somewhere, Hest, don't let it get to you. At least it is her primary role in life - can you imagine how stressful it would be for her and Wills if they were barren? I'm glad I don't have the whole world speculating about me.

I've just been out for an eighteen mile ride. Nice and warm out there, but fucking hell uphill into headwinds is not fun. On the plus side, it meant I was charging down the other side of the loop at the speed of light (25-30mph ish), which is always fun grin I'm still nervous about whether I'll actually get up to the distance/speed required for RideLondon though, doing 100 miles at the average speed of the ride I just did seems like a long way off confused

EuroShaggleton Thu 25-Apr-13 15:08:38

Sorry about the shyteness, rasp.

Hurrah for new job al.

Sorry about Droid/expected arrival of Droid and forthcoming wedding attendance, hags.

Think about Zara, hest. We decided a couple of freds ago that she must be One of Us. I'm sure that must be right. She must feel shyte to be watching DoC glowing and getting all the attention.

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 16:01:44

I bet she isn't barren <dismal>. And even if she was she could pay and pay and pay and pay until she won her baybee.

evilgiraffe Thu 25-Apr-13 16:08:27

You couldn't just pay for endless cycles, though, even if money was no object. It'd drive you round the twist.

DolomitesDonkey Thu 25-Apr-13 17:35:15

Hester imagine having been raised to marry Mr A, to turn a blind eye when you found him in bed with a couple of upper-crust lovelies, to have your teeth fixed, your nose narrowed, exist on 500 calories a day and never voice an opinion. And I don't for one moment believe she was an insta-differ, she was smoking in France during "those pics" - that's the behaviour of someone who's given up. Or maybe she just went on hols, relaxed and it happened! grin

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 17:36:58

Anyway I have been shopping. Items bought include 2x piss sticks, a black pashmina, alright then SCARF, and a black silk flower thing for my hair. Having now tried it on, it looks like nothing other than a gymkhana rosette for some fat little Annabelle or Lucinda's pony. Will have to rethink, bearing in mind only shop here is New Look.

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Thu 25-Apr-13 20:04:48

<pokes Hest in kidneys>

Just cos

Still lurking here, am verging on SEVERE FUCKING BITTERNESS at the moment so I have launched myself into the gym, the dogs and work. We go on our holibobs next week which will be a nice distraction to the question I can't seem to get over..................WHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYY MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE??????????

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 20:13:26

God, Bugger if only there was an answer xxxxxxxxx

KatAndKit Thu 25-Apr-13 20:20:48

bugs hi there - where are the hollibobs going to be? distraction is always a good thing and holidays tend to have wine and gin and other good stuff. You any further with the FC bizniz?

EuroShaggleton Thu 25-Apr-13 20:23:10

Hest that sounds nice. I'm sure you don't look like you are wearing a rosette, lovely.

Bugs I know what you mean. I wish I had no knowledge of EWCM and half of London hadn't peered up my chuff trying to figure out, fruitlessly, what is wrong with me. Why can't I just be an instadiffer?

TWinklyLittleStar Thu 25-Apr-13 20:23:29

bugs I dunno. Luck of the draw, I think. I had a good righteous angry Judge at a differ today, who was being an arsehole. Its so clearly not about 'deserving' it or otherwise.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Thu 25-Apr-13 20:37:45

It's has nothing to do with deserving and undeserving. That's something I had to get my head round when I had my counselling session. We've done nothing wrong to "deserve" this situation, it's is merely the sucky hand we've been dealt.

HadALittleFaithBaby Thu 25-Apr-13 20:52:55

Evening all feels too harsh to call you schlags

bugs there's no rhyme and reason to it but its definitely ok to feel sad about it.

hest rooting for you tomorrow.

al and twink congratulations on the job changes.

Sorry you're struggling rasp.

Is Norf ok? Very quiet.

We are doing ok. Faithlet has been weighed and has gained so much she's 5oz over her birth weight smile boob juice is fattening her up.

<leaves buckets of fish and lashings of gin>

HesterShaw Thu 25-Apr-13 21:06:06

Stabbing in back now. Droid droid droid droid.

JethroTull Thu 25-Apr-13 21:25:17

Rasp I can totally empathise. This time last year I reduced my hours at work from FT to 3 days a week because I just wasn't coping with life. Hang in there.

<shuffles to form penguin circle round all BESH> This is all just so hard sometimes.

JethroTull Thu 25-Apr-13 21:26:05

Faith glad boobs are doing the trick!

Nokkie73 Thu 25-Apr-13 21:40:22

<peers from under duvet of depression to order more gin, white wine, a fish finger sandwich, electric fag red tips and give the world the biggest two fingers she can muster>

Bad week, this week. Am sorry you're all feeling shit too ladies.

Northey Fri 26-Apr-13 06:06:07

Waiting to dance or huddle with hester.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 26-Apr-13 06:49:57

Morning hags, Tassles and gin at the ready for hes depending on the result. Sorry everyone has had such a shit week. Why us indeed.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 26-Apr-13 07:08:54

<checking in>

I've been for my second run. I am dying!! I'm proud though, it's pissing down with rain and I very nearly didn't go out. My bones ache now though <so unfit>

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 26-Apr-13 07:24:05

Well done frank. I went for another run yesterday morning and I couldn't get out of bed this morning.

Northey Fri 26-Apr-13 07:28:50

I ran on Sunday morning and Monday evening and since then have failed to do planned runs on Wed, Thurs or this morning. I deserve my fatness. Bah. Maybe tomorrow, though I am going to a wedding that afternoon, and probably need a clear 5 hours to deforest my legs.

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Apr-13 08:13:02

Good morning all. Fingers crossed for hesty.

HesterShaw Fri 26-Apr-13 08:16:48

Negative. See, I knew it.

FinallyMrsFC Fri 26-Apr-13 08:18:22

Oh Hest. I'm just so bloody sorry sad

HadALittleFaithBaby Fri 26-Apr-13 08:19:51

Oh hest I'm so sorry sad that's just crap <hands over bucket of fish and gin>

evilgiraffe Fri 26-Apr-13 08:27:23

sad <pushes the cod of comfort in hest's direction>

JethroTull Fri 26-Apr-13 08:32:01

((((((Hest ))))))

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 26-Apr-13 08:32:47

Hesty I'm sorry sad

<hands over more gin and chocolate>

KatAndKit Fri 26-Apr-13 08:32:54

I'm sorry - that is really fucking crap.

CaptainMoll Fri 26-Apr-13 08:49:49

Hest, so sorry.

jinglebitch Fri 26-Apr-13 09:02:10

Shittingfuckingwankycuntbollocks :-(

rocketleaf Fri 26-Apr-13 09:27:53

I'm so SO sorry Hestrie :-(

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 26-Apr-13 10:12:28

Sorry hes, it's shit. Have some gin and some cake and a sneaky squeeze of smelly fish

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 26-Apr-13 11:26:07

So sorry hest.

alwyn Fri 26-Apr-13 11:30:21

Sorry hest

I think jingle summed it up extremely eloquently. Go and get utterly smashed at the wedding.

Northey Fri 26-Apr-13 11:58:53

Cock. That's crap. Sometimes you just know, even though at the same time you can't properly give up hope, because of all the people who had no symptoms etc and yet got positives. Shit. I'm sorry. Get lashed at wedding. No chance it's the same one I'm going to, is it (civil partnership thing)? Let's get lashed together.

Nokkie73 Fri 26-Apr-13 12:50:32

Sorry hest. That is indeed a steaming pile of wank.

WrenNatsworthy Fri 26-Apr-13 15:55:49

Coming in for our Hester. So fucking pissed off for her today.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 26-Apr-13 15:58:15

How are you doing now Hesty? I realise that's probably a stupid question.

<tops up gin's all round>

HesterShaw Fri 26-Apr-13 16:27:58

Thanks hags x

EuroShaggleton Fri 26-Apr-13 17:48:59

Sorry about the pee stick, hest. Get proper smashed at the wedding.

I'm back. I'm tired. I had recently got better at sleeping on planes, but I doubt I got 2 hrs last night. And I'm fretting about having my headbump removed. sad

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 26-Apr-13 18:05:19

When's the headbump removal? Do you have some time off coming up now?

CurlyCasper Fri 26-Apr-13 21:16:39

So sorry Hest. Been thinking of you today but only just able to log on. Gin, doughnuts and a lesbo hug. X

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 26-Apr-13 21:30:42

So sorry Hest sad (((((hugs))))) for you.

We really aren't doing very well in here at the moment are we. Can I suggest we need to hit the gin harder?

EuroShaggleton Fri 26-Apr-13 22:07:35

In a couple of weeks, Twink. I'm funny about scars and am stressing about it. The bump has to go before it gets any bigger, but I'm going to have to look at that scar every day for the rest of my life. Or grow a fringe. I don't suit a fringe. <Frets more>

Truffkin Fri 26-Apr-13 22:40:06

So sorry Hest ((((())))) Minimal consolation, you were AWESOME on the tellybox

Northey Fri 26-Apr-13 23:18:27

Affect a 30s style embroidered browband, euro. They'll just love it at work.

EuroShaggleton Sat 27-Apr-13 08:35:04

I was thinking more Rambo, Norf.

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Sat 27-Apr-13 10:05:17

Sorry Hest hope you're feeling ok.

Kat still progressing FC stuff, we go back on 2nd July if not diffed before then for an IVF referral. Currently on my 3rd cycle of 50mg Clomid and had one of 100mg so 4 rounds in total, only 2 left.

We really are not having lots of luck at the moment <huddles with BESH>

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Apr-13 15:52:04

euro you would be amazing as RamboLawyer

My didlocam confirmed PCOS, and found a big cyst on my left ovary too. Plus they woke me up after my night shift to ask if I could come in early, so I am tired and rather cross.

<joins huddle>
<passes round drinks>

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Apr-13 15:52:07

euro you would be amazing as RamboLawyer

My didlocam confirmed PCOS, and found a big cyst on my left ovary too. Plus they woke me up after my night shift to ask if I could come in early, so I am tired and rather cross.

<joins huddle>
<passes round drinks>

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Apr-13 15:53:30

I have no idea why that posted twice.

Nokkie73 Sat 27-Apr-13 16:25:01

Sorry to hear that twinks. Will you have to have treatment for the PCOS (sorry about my ignorance on this subject) and have the cyst taken out ?

Is it too early to have a vodka ?

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 27-Apr-13 17:04:04

You'll probably find that the cyst will shrink and grow again through your cycle Twinks. I had a stonking cyst on my left ovary (22mm) during one cycle, them by the next it had shrink to 8mm.

PCOS is pretty common so don't worry too much about it.

I'm sorry hester sad big hugs to you lovely girl xxxx

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 27-Apr-13 19:39:41

I wouldn't say I was worried frank

EuroShaggleton Sat 27-Apr-13 19:42:47

I like the idea of being Rambolawyer. Maybe headbump removal won't be so bad....

Wot's the next step then twinks?

How was the wedding hest?

How is everyone else doing? We have been putting in some new cupboards to add some storage and installing a safe (finally getting round to it prompted by neighbour's burglary a couple of weeks ago). My dad has been helping which is good cos we are both a bit rubbish at DIY stuff. My dad is brilliant at it though, so everything is looking good so far!

CaptainMoll Sat 27-Apr-13 20:00:16

If I needed a lawyer, I would definitely hire Rambolawyer.

I'm on my way to visit BE for the weekend (he's away for work) so am nursing crampy womble and looking forwards to comforting hugs/snogs.

Hope Hesterface is having a splendid time getting trollied at the wedding.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 28-Apr-13 08:18:45

Rambolawyer - that could be your nect nickname (although I like shaggleton as well!)

How was the wedding, hes are you nursing a huge hangover? And are you okay. Holding out hands and not-birthday-cake, which I am baking as we speak and I shall be partaking of in copious amounts.

Sorry about the cyste and being woken up twinks.

On other news I went for another run yesterday, so I have every excuse to have my bottom molded to the couch today smile

TWinklyLittleStar Sun 28-Apr-13 19:06:29

Enjoy your relax driz, how far/fast are you running? I went for a "run" this afternoon. It is in quote marks because it was so shamefully slow I'm not sure it can really be called a run. Still any exercise after a night shift is a good effort right?

euro I've got to make a gp appointment to see what next, and the cyst will need monitoring. My sister had to have one surgically removed and my abdomen is scarred to shit after having my gallbladder out so I rather hope my cyst is more like frank's than my sister's. HWCA will be going for his first ever spaff test this week as well, so that should be interesting. How are your cupboards looking?

moll hope you're being well looked after.

Very quiet here isn't it?

hest love if you're lurking, just want you to know you're in my thoughts and I hope you're taking care of yourself.

HesterShaw Sun 28-Apr-13 20:58:19

Thanks lovely Winks.

Feel a little better today. Yesterday was quite awful. I got to to abut 9.30pm at the wedding and couldn't cope at all. I went and sat in the car and cried for hours. Then MrHest came out looking for me and we left early. I looked like nothing on earth, all red and swollen. Trouble was I didn't know anyone there and the strain of being all polite and sociable and interested, when no one was really interested back, was too much. Crying so much gives you a fuck off headache, I have found out smile

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sun 28-Apr-13 21:02:48

<strokes Hesty's hair>

I know what you mean about those "crying headaches", I've had plenty of those sad. Glad you are feeling a bit better though, and I did enjoy your phallic veggie option photo in t'other place wink

HesterShaw Sun 28-Apr-13 21:05:29


I was on the verge of hysteria all day, one what or t'other.

EuroShaggleton Sun 28-Apr-13 21:36:48

My cupboards look lovely. I just have to hope that my clumsy cleaner doesn't scratch them to shit. She is a bit "hulk smash" in her approach to things.... We also have a working burglar alarm for the first time ever, which is good.

hesty that sounds awful. I'm sorry you had a shit time. Did you feel better after a good cry? I always do.

drizz I must get back to running. I stopped when diffed, started again to try to trigger the mc bleed when it all went wrong, and have then been too drained/busy to keep it going. I am nearly a stone overweight and feel like shit. Meh.

RaspberrySnowCone Sun 28-Apr-13 21:49:27

oh Hest, I know all about the crying headaches, I've had one since my meltdown on Wednesday. The crying can be therapeutic though, it just all needs to come out sometimes.

Well done to the runners, I might do a bit in the summer. Trouble is I get bored with running a bit easy but its nice to do now and then for a change.

Can't you get a different cleaner Euro? Cant be worth having someone who trashes everything and doesn't actually clean much?

Me and MATV have been blocked by someone I thought was a friend on FB. Very odd. Another friend has said they will ask them why. To be honest it was one of those friendships that has run its course, lives gone in different directions an all that but blocking seems a bit harsh. Nearly let it bother me but I actually have much bigger fish to fry. I'm massively behind with my coursework and work is rubbish and life is poop so yes, I have much bigger fish to fry indeed. I can't seem to concentrate on anything at the moment, its so frustrating.

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 10:50:56

I've considered it, rasp but she irons and what she does clean she does well (she just misses bits). Also, she has 5 kids and I think she is probably reliant on the money. <soft touch emoticon>

How very odd about the FB blocking. Surely you only block someone if they have really upset you in some way?

I'm back in the office today, with a mountain of email to catch up on.

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Apr-13 14:47:47

Perhaps she just needs a little nudge every now and then. Good luck with your emails, I can back last week to a mountain of the damn things. Hate them.

I've come home early, had yet another melt down last night then the woman who was off sick has returned today so we've had words. Apparently she's going to email the confirmation letter through today but its not her fault, she sent it all weeks ago and it never reached the hospital. I've requested a formal investigation because I want to know where my sensitive, confidential paperwork has gone. It's sat on someone's desk and I want to know who's. fuckers. So, after speaking to her I had a melt down at work and literally ran from the office to my car and just drove off, drove for 15 minutes just any where, stopped and had a breather then went back but consequently now feel and look like poo. Pfft. Life is a mare isn't it

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 17:10:22

Oh, rasp sad Is it worth talking to HR at work? If you feel this bad, they might be able to help take some of the pressure off. My last workplace had a counselling/general confidential help service for employees too - does yours have something similar? Although to be honest, I'd be surprised if the GP doesn't sign you off with stress if you're feeling so bad. And RAGE at the incompetent fuckwits losing the paperwork! shock That's appalling angry

Hugs for hest too, but well done for getting through the wedding smile

No running here (aside from HOTB, who ran the four miles to the bike shop to pick up his newly-serviced commuter ths morning), but I cycled a personal best round my ten-mile loop earlier - 15mph is not too shabby! Especially given the slow fools driving like snails on market day. I'm also pleased that the weight is still slowly but surely dropping off; I'm now just over a stone above the "normal" BMI cutoff so comfortably under the overweight/obese cutoff for the IVF criteria. A stone doesn't seem too frightening, given that I was three stones clear of the cutoff a few years ago shock blush

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Mon 29-Apr-13 18:17:26

Sorry you are feeling so crap Raspberry, so many of us seem to be near rock bottom at the moment sad

Well done on the bike ride evil. Here's a reward for you (sorry about the Daily Fail link, but you'll like it wink)

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 19:54:26

rasp that sounds awful. How are you feeling now?

I want to start a personal campaign against crap admin in fertilty services. CACAFS. It sounds kind of official. It makes me so, so angry. It puts huge amounts of stress on people who are already in a miserable, stressful situation. Grrrr.

Draf a stone is definitely doable, particularly with all the activity that you do.

I am on a bit of a mission myself. I am feeling horribly unfit and untoned post-mc. I am starting cutting down on the food today, and will start back at the gym properly. I'm off to France soon and I'm going to look a right heifer next to my impossibly slim SMIL. sad

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 20:04:26

I did another run this evening. I'm thinking of going back to weight watchers. I think I need to be accountable to someone, and really I need to shift about a stone and a half.

rasp it is mindboggling how shit those admin people are. You just do not need that!

Nokkie73 Mon 29-Apr-13 20:50:11

He all

rasp good on you for requesting a formal investigation. If I were you, I would start on with potential data protection breaches, as you want to ensure that your personal data wasn't left where it shouldn't have been (or missing). Public bodies shit themselves about such things so I would recommend playing dirty and insist that you get an assurance from someone senior that it was secure at all times. If not, you will consider notifying the Information Commissioner (who is the kind of regulatory gatekeeper for data protection and freedom of information issues). Sorry to get all technical but they have fucked you around so much, I cannot believe it. I am with euro in that this sort of thing is just stressful enough without all this bollocks going on too. AND the admin staff need to realise that going off on the sick, or sitting there eating fucking custard donuts with their fingers up their arses is no excuse for being inefficient or shit at their jobs. If they are, they will be taken to task.

Here endeth the sermon. blush

hest all I can send you is a massive hug and some industrial strength nurofen for the crying headaches. I feel your pain. I hope you're being spoilt by 'Im indoors. Xx

Hello to all the other lovely ladies. You have inspired me to start running, Ffs. If I have a heart attack, it's your fault.


TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 20:53:25

Good sports bra norks and plenty of breaks, you'll be fine. MN swears by the C25k programme, have you looked at that?

rasp norks has good advice.

draf well done on the bike ride. What sort of bike are you riding? Well done as well on the weight loss, that's fantastic. What way have you done it?

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Apr-13 21:03:25

Well done on the weight loss and the PB Evil, that's very good. I've no idea about what I might be able to get through work, I might ask but am a bit scared that I'd get judged! I've just got myself in a real tizz. Very frustrating because I know I'm doing it, I just can't stop myself.

How are you feeling now Hest?

RaspberrySnowCone Mon 29-Apr-13 21:10:42

Oh, my phone failed to show me all this evenings mwssages! Thanks everyone smile feeling calmer this evening, still frustrated but calmer.

I'm willing to get fully behind euro and her campaign. Nokkie I will take your advice! I will most likely have to put something in writing. MATV writes a mean shirty letter so I may entrust it to him.

Very jealous of Euro and Twinks impending hols even though I've only just come home myself.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Mon 29-Apr-13 21:13:34

Norks you can download C25K here. Apparently they do another one called Stretch & Flex....

ginhag Mon 29-Apr-13 21:14:12


Hester. I have just popped in with this large bottle of gin (obviously) to say I LUFFS YA and also YOU ARE ACE.

I'm so sorry you are having to fight the fight. I will volunteer to let you smash a barstool over my head if it helps?

<downs tequila in anticipation>

Love and strength my darlin' xxxx <--- yeah, they're kisses. KISSES.

Nokkie73 Mon 29-Apr-13 21:14:21

twinklesprinkles I have massive knockers. Oh, hang on a minute, that's my avatar, the massive two bit slag hag. It's more the lazy inner hag that I have to fight to do anything less than yoga at the moment.

Wtf is the C25k ? Is it some sort of cult ? Lead me to this devilry please grin

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:21:45

frank has linked to it for you. It's the NHS couch to 5k programme, a running plan for absolute beginners. It is kind of cult-ish!

rasp don't worry about getting judged. I've jacked in a development programme at work and gone back to the least prestigious of all roles, and I know that everyone who sees me is whispering and trying to work out if I've been kicked off the programme, if I've done something terrible - but I haven't, I've just taken steps to preserve my own mental health because I know how awful hating your job is. Fuck 'em all.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Mon 29-Apr-13 21:22:38

Couch 2 5K. It's a 9 week programme to get you from the couch (doing bugger all) to running 5k. You run 3 times a week listening to the podcasts. I've just finished Week 1 which is basically walk 5 minutes, run 60s, walk 90s (repeat 8 times). As you move on through the weeks you start running for slightly longer periods of time until you reach the last run of weekb9 which is a full 30min run.

'Tis quite good acksherly. I always said I hated running, but this is keeping me interested at the moment grin

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 21:25:17

Good advice from Nookie, put the frighteners on them!

Twinks, I have a gorgeous road bike - I love it to bits. It goes astonishingly fast given enough input, fastest speed recorded so far (downhill with a strong tail wind) is 35.3mph, which was great fun last week grin

I lost the first stone ages ago, mostly by being less of a greedy pig, I think. The second stone has gone since Christmas through the dubious method of eating little/nothing for breakfast and lunch, and small portions for dinner. I'm not cutting anything out because it would make me sad, but I try not to eat too much cake too often! The cycling is helping a lot, too, though over the winter I didn't get much done as it was so icy. I don't think I ever drank in any great excess, but I am consciously limiting myself to one (double) G&T every Friday, which is good for the IVF forms as well as my weight. Mind you, since resigning last August, the stress-induced desire to drink has really dropped off.

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 21:30:28

I did couch to 5k at the end of 2011/beginning of 2012. I was quite surprised I was able to run 5k at all, but HOTB and I were going out and running that distance every weeknight for several months.

I got scared of running after coming home last Easter and going into anaphylactic shock for no apparent reason, though, and have not really dared to run since. Still, the allergy people said they could find no cause, and it was over a year ago, so perhaps I should try again <wibble> Mind you, I always hated it, except the smug feeling when I stopped. Running is like punishment, where cycling is fun even when it hurts.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 21:40:34

<very jealous of bike>

<headbutts Gin affectionately>

Rasp it sounds like Nookie has some good advice? Kick som ass. I know that takes energy though, so do it once you have summoned your strength. They completely fucked everything up. I am obviously sorry for anyone who goes off ill, but they should have provision in place to deal with stuff like that.

Running scares me.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:40:42

I kind of feel like that about running too. I much prefer 'disguised' exercise, like iceskating, horseriding, that sort of thing. Cycling isn't too bad, at least I can make progress at a reasonable speed. Running has got a few things going for it - it's easy to just go and do, it burns a lot of calories, plus now I'm back in a job where there's a decent chance I might have to run, not that I'll catch anyone but I don't want to make a complete and utter tit out of myself...

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 21:43:52

Yes exactly. When I run, after a while I feel like my bowels are going to fall out of my arse, and I wheeze. It's silly because in terms of long term fitness, I have always been fit and strong. I think I did so much in my youth that I have good stores!

"Disguised exercise" - good term. PLaying football with nephews and nieces, cycling, sailing....that kind of thing.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 21:44:57

Hugh Jackman is slaying vampires on ITV2. Can we have a Hugh Jackman fred?

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:45:55

Sailing is good for weight loss. For me. Because every time I go near a boat - except a river rowing boat, oddly - I empty my stomach hmm

Nokkie73 Mon 29-Apr-13 21:46:02

rasp I wouldn't want to rain on MATV's parade at all but if you wanted me to help you with the data protection bit, I would be more than happy to help if you need it. X

frank cheers for that. I shall investigate it. Sounds like just the sort of thing I need to keep me interested in running because, it's fundamentally fucking dull. Good for shifting the blubber though, I admit.

raff sounds like you have really done well my love !

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:53:20

Changing the subject a bit - ok, completely - I had a hearing the other day, the trial is definitely starting on the Monday and judge has decreed we have 2 days so I WILL be seeing Star Trek in the Imax on its release day grin

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 21:54:00

I think you have hit the nail on the head.

Running is boring.

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 21:55:00

rasp you've just reminded me that you were down in that part of the world recently. We're flying crap ryanair, so need to pack light. What was the weather like? Shorts in the day, cardigans in the evening? I have been in May before but not for a couple of years.

Draf that must have given you quite a scare! I am not a natural runner and have to be careful of an old knee injury, but I quite enjoy it once I get going. The first run after a break is always the worst though. I'm dreading that one.

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 21:56:57

Hurrah for a helpful trial date twinks!

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:57:40

I boycott RyanAir. They are properly on my shitlist. We're flying SleazyJet to Nice when we go, and I too would like clothing tips. Although I don't do shorts, for the greater good.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 21:58:01

Fanks euro! Hurrah indeed!!

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 21:59:01

Sailing scares the shit out of me. It's fine once you get going, but the first setting up sails flappy bit frightens me half to death. I have no idea why. I really should get HOTB to sell our boat, I doubt we're ever going to really use it...

And YAY Star Trek, Twinks! On those lines - thanks for the link, Frank! Did you see the gorgeous Chris Pine/Karl Urban red carpet hug at the Australian premiere? They are two smiley gorgeous fuckers <hearts in my eyes>

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:03:11

Ryan Air are cunts.

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 22:03:23

Euro, it wasn't too scary at the time, to be honest, but then oxygen deprivation will do that to you. HOTB really should have called an ambulance, especially as the fuckwit GP later dismissed it as hayfever... Allergy specialist had no doubts, though! My epipen is now out of date and because there's no obvious cause I'm not allowed to get a replacement, but I still carry it with me everywhere just in case. It's far more frightening after the fact - for months whenever my heart rate went up I got very worried, but have mostly got over it now smile

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:05:26

We were five minutes late for check in once when flying back from some obscure shithole in France. Even though I could pretty much touch the queue the other side of the gate, they wouldn't let us on. We have to pay £400 extra to fly back to another airport in the UK, hire a car to drive back to the airport we had flown from in order to pick up our car.

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 22:09:02

They are definitely cunts. But they are the only cunts who fly direct from the UK to the airport that is a 20 min drive from the PIL's place, so we use them whenever we go there. As long as you obey the stupid rules, it's fine.

Hest you emerged! How are you doing? That is enormously shit, hest. I've heard a lot of similar stories and more worryingly stuff about them sailing close to the wind in terms of fuel on board. But, I'll sacrifice a lot for convenience.

draf what a strange incident. I don't blame you for carrying the epipen!

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:11:03

I am officially Up and Down, Euro.

I want a baybeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to hold and cuddle. I have Empty Arm Syndrome.

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:11:24

Empty ArmS that should be.

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 22:18:05

I think Empty Arm was about right. Most people on here use one arm for the baybee and the other for MNing.

Ryan Air charged me shed loads of money for being a tiny bit over the weight limit - every other fuckers gives you a 20kg limit, not them, oh no, but I assumed - then I had a fly-for-free, weighed a shitload more than my baggage 'excess' toddler next to me, pulling my hair and climbing on me for the duration of the flight angry

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 22:18:30

Oh. That tugged at my heartstring. sad

TWinklyLittleStar Mon 29-Apr-13 22:19:38

Gosh. My reply there was callous. Sorry hest sad

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:24:32

Sorry Euro. Here, have this fishslap instead.

Didn't think it was callous so much as true, Winks. Dunno how on earth these women do it, especially seeing as most of them claim to be wall to wall breastfeeding until their offspring starts school <sour>

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 22:28:27

Empty arm just makes me think of this - 14:00 to 14:25 ish grin

HesterShaw Mon 29-Apr-13 22:29:31

As soon as I clicked on that and saw the title "Hancock's Half Hour" I knew what you mean. That's very nearly an armful!

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 22:30:38

<is even more callous>

EuroShaggleton Mon 29-Apr-13 22:31:49

Old skool, draf.

Twink the worst is when the flight is delayed so they use the extra time to piss people off by doing things like weighing and measuring hand luggage.

Thanks hest. I feel better for that. smile

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 22:31:59

Hurrah, not that callous! grin It makes me laugh so much.

CaptainMoll Mon 29-Apr-13 23:27:11

I'd like a Huge Ackman plz.

I have nothing more useful to contribute this evening.

evilgiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 23:47:31

Who was it who suggested a Hugh Jackman fred? I'm well up for that. We can stab instadiffers through the throat with our adamantium blade-claws. Not that I like ultra-violence or anything...

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Tue 30-Apr-13 08:15:15

I did my first run of week 2 today. Ouch!

HesterShaw Tue 30-Apr-13 09:46:03

I was thinking more of just shagging him. We could all have a go. Me first though.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 09:50:22

Don't tire him out too much eh?

Well done frank. Don't forget to stretch.

My cousin had her baybee this morning. I'm at home this weekend, I'll be expected to visit. I don't want to.

HesterShaw Tue 30-Apr-13 10:06:55

Um right. TWinks do we actually know each other. Because my SIL had her baby this morning also <freaked out>

HesterShaw Tue 30-Apr-13 10:28:50

OK, we don't know each other. More than one baby born on the same day? Remarkable.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 10:30:30

One born every minute and all that.

So, passive aggressive gifts. Maternity pads, nipple cream, a jar of coffee for those sleepless nights?

HesterShaw Tue 30-Apr-13 10:33:37

Ah yes, we'll talk about it here.

lavender oil for shredded fanjo
Pro plus
Red Bull
Rescue Remedy
pile cream

EuroShaggleton Tue 30-Apr-13 10:38:13

Maybe we should make up a BESH preggo and birth pack?

HadALittleFaithBaby Tue 30-Apr-13 10:38:15

Oi, I thought me and hesty had agreed dibs on Huge?!

That list sounds excellent hest!

Lots of baybees borned in the last few weeks - Olympic/Augur conceptions! (guilty blush)

HadALittleFaithBaby Tue 30-Apr-13 10:38:28


TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 10:45:04

Just noticed the nc faif, like it. But you'll have to join the fight queue for Hugh.

Anyway I'm buying my cousin fuck all. I have PMT, my boobs hurt, and I had a magners and a beer last night after months.of sobriety and I feel sick as a dog. After two drinks, ffs. Won't be doing that again.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Tue 30-Apr-13 12:31:29

I won't join the queue for Huge Ackman, it's all about the Cumberbatch over here grin. I have booked my tickets to see Star Trek on my birthday <doubts she'll find Cumberbatch gift wrapped at the end of the bed on the day so it's the next best thing>.

Can't believe I'll be 32 in less than 2 weeks. I always thought I'd be sprogged up by now sad

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Tue 30-Apr-13 12:54:55

Just popping in to say that Queenie posted a brilliant article / link on FB about a blog written by a bloke. It summarised the 10 feelings associated with infertility. It was brilliant.

I'll try to post a link here

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Tue 30-Apr-13 12:56:16

It wasnt about a blog, it is a blog. Sorry!

Nokkie73 Tue 30-Apr-13 13:11:05

bugs. That's quite perceptive for a man. Up to a point. Will God help me put a baby in my tumtum, do you think ? [hmmm]

hest can you add a 3 for 2 voucher for Relate and the book 'No-one gives an arse when you put Freddie on solids'. I speak from bitter experience. An entire hen weekend was nearly ruined by one very lovely new mother boring the cunt off me trying to decide when to put her son onto solids.

franks Cumberbatch ? Really ? I can't fancy him, ever since I saw him play Stephen Hawking. Is that wrong ? Probably.

twinks you mixed the booze, hence you feel like shittypoop. School girl error.

CaptainMoll Tue 30-Apr-13 13:35:34

That actually made me want to cry a bit, but I'm at work so I can't do that.

CaptainMoll Tue 30-Apr-13 13:36:00

(Apart from the God)

CaptainMoll Tue 30-Apr-13 13:36:54

Noks, pleeeeease write that book.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 13:43:12

Yes please do write that book. I would buy it.

I liked that article a lot and I'm

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 13:44:04

... I'm hitting post way too soon hmm

I'm bookmarking it. Points 7 & 8 especially.

Nokkie73 Tue 30-Apr-13 13:57:49

I'll let you all know when it's finished. It'll be a series. I'll be like a bitter JK Rowling. Second book will be 'No-one gives an arse when you potty train Freddie' followed by 'no-one gives an arse when Freddie picks-up germs at nursery''ll run and run, this idea.

twinks any time now, I am expecting to be informed of BIL & SIL's baby's christening. As it's CASAF's brother, I shall be expected to go. I am thinking of telling them to all fuck off and not bother. Especially as they spoke to step-father in law about 'my situation' and felt so sorry for me and 'can only imagine how I must be feeling'. Can you ? Well, if you can mind read and know me so well, you'll know how much I want to punch you in your sanctimonious fat but essentially fucking dull head right now. Yeah, you know exactly how I feel as you never call, text, email or fuck all to see how I feel. Honestly, instadiffers get on my fucking tits, they really do.

Blimey. Don't know where that came from. blush

evilgiraffe Tue 30-Apr-13 16:33:35

Nice blog post! It's all bang on, aside from the God bits. Interesting to her what it's like from a male perspective, too; HOTB is fundamentally reticent and optimistic, so I have very little idea how he feels unless I pester him to tell me.

Excellent book series, Nookie. I'd buy it.

My car is in the garage overnight, waiting for a tyre, grr. Still, I had a nice afternoon with my friend and got baybee cuddles, which is lovely - her son is a cheerful little soul smile

evilgiraffe Tue 30-Apr-13 16:36:38

Also, it's not wrong to be put off The Batch by Stephen Hawking association. It's (possibly inaccurate) common knowledge round here that Hawking is not the friendliest of men, and will run you over and potentially swear at you if you don't move out of his way sharpish. I've seen him in town once, and made damn sure I was out of his way! grin

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 20:07:33

I have been to weightwatchers, I am officially FAT, and my boobs are hurting more than I can describe sad

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Tue 30-Apr-13 20:42:43

Where are you in your cycle Winks.... in fact, where is everyone? We've not really had a progress catch up in a while.

I've just been to the gym............ I now want to eat everything we own.

I've lost 7lb though since 18th March. Its come off slowly and I feel brill.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 20:45:46

CD28 bugs, for what it's worth. I'm not even menkulling, I know it's just PMT. Crappy ovaries. Well done on the weight loss. That's a nice steady loss and I bet you've toned up loads too.

CaptainMoll Tue 30-Apr-13 20:57:27

Aren't we a healthy crowd tonight? I've just got back from the pool..
Bugs, I'm on cd6 or thereabouts - FF is a little confused about me just now. This cycle's out though cos of surgery.

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Tue 30-Apr-13 20:58:18

I have, I still wobble a lot on my thighs but my tummy is more toned. I'm taking my gym stuff on holiday with good intentions to use it!!

I'm CD16 and my nips hurt. I only have 2 cycles of clomid left if this one doesn't work.

evilgiraffe Tue 30-Apr-13 21:18:41

CD22 here. There's no way I'm diffed, either, what with having been ill at the beginning of this cycle and really not SWI much either. Still, surgery is only four weeks away, so it's for the best anyway.

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 21:20:41

I just cried, yes cried, watching The Biggest Loser. Safe to say the PMT is peaking and droid is imminent!

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Tue 30-Apr-13 21:36:52

I'm on CD 68 with no sign of ov <sigh>. I have my tablets to induce droid, but as we're off to New York in just over 2 weeks I need to time taking them so that droid arrives when we get back. We've got 4 cycles of ovulation induction left before we get referred for IVF.

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Apr-13 21:47:14

Just for Bugs by way of an update - I am half way through my cycle, ovulated yesterday I reckon due to pains in the ovary area but no CM? Weird as I usually get quite a bit. However, that is irrelevant as MATV is still determined to keep up the shag drought and we haven't been near each other in about 8 weeks now. sad

Noks I demand you write those books. they would be best sellers.

I love that article, minus the god bit it would be perfick. I wish I had the balls to post it to FB as I think it would do a few people some good to see it but I couldn't be arsed with the nosey bastard inquiries I would inevitably get but good on Faif for posting it though smile It's the sort of thing I'd only be able to do once I had a baybee for sure.

Thanks for all your kind words over the last few days BESH, I really have appreciated it and would have been in much more of a state if it wasn't for you lot. You really are the dogs hairy gonads smile

EuroShaggleton Tue 30-Apr-13 22:11:03

I'm loving nok's book ideas.

The blog is great (minus the god bothery bit). I've been pondering posting it too, rasp but I think it might be a bit too public for KFZK. Yep, good on faif for putting it up there.

I've also been to the gym this evening. It has been a while. Ouch.

I'm 5dpo if I actually oved this cycle. And we have done the sechs for the first time since diffage. Hurrah. That was a long drought.

RaspberrySnowCone Tue 30-Apr-13 22:21:07

Well done on gym effort! I'm impressed.

On the clothes front, it was getting hot when we were there so I reckon it will just keep going up over the next few weeks. I took quite summery clothes but a couple of pairs of skinny jeans and flip flops and some linen trousers and that was pretty much what I wore the whole holiday smile

HesterShaw Tue 30-Apr-13 22:40:17

Facefuck is full of snuffly new baybee pics

<gets drunk>

Hark at you lot all going to the gym!

TWinklyLittleStar Tue 30-Apr-13 22:44:54

My cousin doesn't fb much so I don't think I'll be too tortured with this one.

I put way too much garlic in my tzatziki tonight.

Thanks for the clothing tips rasp. Sorry MATV is being so utterly hopeless when you need him to be supportive.

EuroShaggleton Tue 30-Apr-13 22:45:21

I'm shattered now! The gym AND sex on a school night has completely done me in.

Thanks for the weather tip, rasp. I went at this time of year a couple of years ago and I remember it getting a little chilly in the evenings but couldn't remember what it was like in the days. I can't wait. Cheese, bread, wine and hopefully a little sunshine. Mmmmm.

Northey Wed 01-May-13 06:24:55

Just popping in to give bugs my update and put my name down for the No one gives an arse about Freddie series.

CD10, after 4 days of period and 6 days of copious brown juice. Yum. Next droid I get to phone the clinic and book in for a frozen cycle.

hest, my weekend wedding was similarly grim. So many people asked me about baybee plans, and the one couple in the room who actually knew our whole situation pinned us against a pillar with their baybee in their arms and burbled on happily for 20 minutes about their plans for their second. When they left I circled the table, methodically downing every abandoned glass of port on it. The next morning I was sicker than I've ever been, and I still consider it a good swap for the awfulness of having to listen to them.

RaspberrySnowCone Wed 01-May-13 06:49:35

People are such twats Norf, well done you for not punching anyone. That couple would have made me insanely angry to the point of violence.

HadALittleFaithBaby Wed 01-May-13 08:07:32

Morning BESHlas. Tis easy for me to post that to FB now having admitted it took so long to win a baybee. I was very surprised how many people then told is they'd been in the same boat.

Well done on all the exercise.

I hope my news feed hasn't contributed too much to the excessive tiny baybee photos hest? I am trying to limit it...

evilgiraffe Wed 01-May-13 08:52:12

Good grief, norf, you did well not to hit anyone. I am gobsmacked about people asking about baybee plans - thankfully HOTB and I haven't really had that. Even for the fertile, it's a really nosy question - why the hell do people think it's okay to pry into someone else's sex life and personal choices? And for childless couples of childbearing age, surely the possibility of infertility or illness or choice must be something that enters the mind of onlookers, so why do they ask such a probing question?

DolomitesDonkey Wed 01-May-13 09:55:17

Northy The next time someone does that (and invariably they will) - you won't be arrested for saying "Why are you saying this? Have we not discussed this before and you are aware of our situation? With all due respect, I'm here with my husband - FUCK OFF".

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 09:55:44

Dearest Faif, I didn't even have you in mind when I posted that. Don't worry xx

Norf what a load of cunts. I can't believe it sad

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 09:58:19

And draf, that's exactly my take on it. When a woman gets to my age there generally are two possibilities: that she's decided not to have children, or that she's having trouble conceiving. Neither of them are anyone else's business angry

EuroShaggleton Wed 01-May-13 10:51:41

Bloody hell norf! What insensitive twonks.

faif you have been very restrained on the baby photo front. I'd say you have it just right actually. Updates but not a constant bombardment. I shall try to remember that if I am ever in the same position!

HadALittleFaithBaby Wed 01-May-13 11:05:57

Fanks smile the have done a group for those who want regular updates and I do a daily photo/update in there which helps me restrain myself on the main thing.

Norf I admire your restraint. I tended to go with a very tight lipped That's a very sensitive subject actually. Shut most people up!

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 11:24:10

norf blimey O Riley, that's insensitive to the point of being crass. I am surprised that you didn't indulge in a bit of mindless violence afterwards. Although we all say that, but when you're in that situation, you are so stunned, then trying not to cry because everything is so shit and then trying not to make a scene, that we let people like that burble on until they go away. And they don't realise that they have made you feel like shit. And then we do feel like total shit and minesweep for glasses of port/wine/gin/fish and drink them until we feel sick. That said, it sounds as though they should have known better. Fucking instadiffers. Next time, you can brandish my sub-series 'No-one gives an arse about you or your plans to pop a baybee in your tumtum, beeatch'. Fuck, I feel like that ginger teacher in Glee who has a leaflet for everything.

Anyway, my update is that I am in for the hysteroscopy next week. Just been for the pre-op assessment at Guys. One and three quarter bastard hours for them to swab my nose, throat, fanjo, make me fill-out several questionnaires and then make me nearly fucking faint and vomit by trying to take blood from every conceivable vein in my fucking arm. To cap it all, I had to go into starfucks to grab a coffee to calm down after my needle trauma and when I was asked for my name, the fucking twat working behind the counter mis-heard me and shouted, rather incredulously, 'IGLOO ??'. Yes that's right. 'My parents are huge fans of the Inuit people' I said, 'and naming me after their traditional home was their tribute to them'. In my head. Fucking fuck fuck.

Anyway, after hysterofanjooscopy, I shall be reviewing the situation (selling everything i own and quite probably going on the game) and preparing to go for IVF again around July-ish time. In the meantime, I shall be having two periods in a week, feeling like a wide-eyed mental and being uber sensitive to pretty much everything. Oh, and that will be interspersed with feelings of despair at putting on half a stone and nothing fitting my fat ass, feelings of acute lethargy followed by weird energy bursts and non-stop raging at the world, thinking '^why me^'.

Still, at least the 'No-one gives an arse' series will make me rich.

I downloaded the C25K sheet yesterday. I am going out for a run later. Yikes-a-fucking-Rama.

A plaster-covered Norks. X

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 12:03:41

Noks, I see a great publishing career ahead of you.
Sorry about the crapness.
I'm going to start the c25k next week I reckon. Just need to find some trainers..

EuroShaggleton Wed 01-May-13 12:09:52

Good trainers and a decent bra are key. Everything else can be improvised from stuff you already have. I saw someone jogging in converse yesterday and cringed for his poor knees.

nok that sounds like a right pain in the t1ts. And Igloo? Really?

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 12:32:34

Euro Igloo. Really. Ffs. I hate starfucks.

cap'n please start it next week. We can be in pain and whine on and on about how shit snd boring running is together. Erm, I mean get thin together.

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 12:43:13

Noks, the only issue is that I'll just be getting into it when I have to get sliced up by a gynaecologist, and then I'll have to quit for a while.
I will start next week anyway, for solidarities sake.

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 12:48:04

cap'n air punches all round for this exceptional show of solidarity. Scowls for gynae who will be sloshing around mini moll. What are they doing ?

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 12:56:30

It's a cheeky lap & dye / fibroid removal combo.

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 13:10:25

I know you were talking about something not funny, Noks, but I'm roaring at the Innuit anecdote. It's the way you tell 'em.

More fanjo news from me, just to join in. I have to have a scan next week to inspect the suspected polyp. If it is one, they will have to remove it. So I may be in for a procedure like the one described.

If the polyp is not a polyp, then I will crack on with round two immediately and I've received the schedule for that, just in case. They are upping my doses of everything. Great, I'll be even spottier and more mental.

But I'm hoping for the second scenario, obviously.

evilgiraffe Wed 01-May-13 13:19:57

Noks, you are wasted on law. Seriously, that last post was comedic genius. Also, I'm now trying to figure out your name. Is it even remotely similar to igloo? <curious>

It is a glorious day here in the Fens. If the rest of you have even half of the stillness and sunshine we do today, go out for a walk or a bike ride or something, it's lovely. I've just ridden 24.5 miles at an average of 15.1mph - another PB and I'm feeling smug. It was brilliant fun smile

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 13:23:23

Gosh it's fanjo prodding central round here. norks that sounds like an awful day, and that particular Starbucks is especially shite. It's just there to throw muffins and lattes at accountants and doctors in the morning. To be fair, I don't think Igloo would stand out as a particularly stupid name in many parts of Sarf London.

hest I hope you get really spotty and grumpy instead of needing a polypectomy.

moll good solidarity. I'm impressed and motivated. I second the 'don't run in converse' advice. Ouch ouch ouch!

No droid yet and my boobs are so sore that trotting was a bit of an ordeal this morning. HWCA was torturing me so I got my own back by informing him that I need to boil and trim my mooncup, and told him about the lady that posted that she'd dropped hers. He was absolutely horrified grin

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 13:27:17

draf it's lovely here too, instead of going into the indoor school we took the horse out round Epping Forest, it was fabulous.

evilgiraffe Wed 01-May-13 13:58:57

Oh, nice! I'm looking forward to visiting my parents next month and playing at ponies. We're going about 3-4 days after the laparoscopy - I'll be fine to ride for that week, right? <hopeful> I can always go slowly, I suppose.

EuroShaggleton Wed 01-May-13 14:01:30

Twink I've never completely dropped mine, but I have caught it and sprayed the contents around the place a bit...

draf that sounds lovely. I wish I weren't stuck in the office.

Hest I also hope that you get to be spotty and grumpy rather than having the polypectomy.

EuroShaggleton Wed 01-May-13 14:06:30

draf that might be a bit ambitious. I was walking very gingerly in the hunchback pose (my stiches pulled if I stood upright) a few days after mine.

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 14:12:28

Is that what it's called then?

<googles polypectomy> Sounds like the extraction of a parrot.

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 14:15:57
TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 16:20:03

Oh hest, don't google. Never google. To be fair, you'll be knocked out for the horrid part, then it'll just be like having a manky period, so maybe it won't be that bad? I scared myself shitless before I had my gallbladder out, and that wasn't too bad, really.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 01-May-13 18:10:01

"Never, Ever Google" is the second rule of BESH Club.

Glad you've got a resemblance of a plan Hesty, and hoping you don't need the slice 'n dice.

I'm just finishing up my latest assignment, more examination of the horse breeding industry. If we got alf the medical attention these darn mares get we'd have all been diffed years ago!

Can't remember if I mentioned before, but our furry addition(s) to the family is still on hold. The potential-mum cat is barren <laughs ironically>. She's been mated on 3 consecutive heats and has been empty each time. Apparently it's very unusual, hence me now assuming that I'm contagious confused

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 18:58:18

Contagious barrenness? Actually I take perverse comfort in the fact that there is another species besides mine which can be infertile. Springtime can be so depressing with all these bastarding cute lambs, calves, kittens, baby birds etc.

I asked about anaesthetic. She said you don't have one. Surely this can't be true?

Also, I will ringing the clinic tomorrow to find out why they will be upping my dose of everything, when I responded well last time, producing three ripe follies. Surely they don't want more than three?

JethroTull Wed 01-May-13 19:27:17

Frank what's the first rule?

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Wed 01-May-13 19:37:21

Evening Hags. I was meant to be seeing a friend tonight who (as usual) blobbed on me at the very last minute. I find it really hard to forgive her as she ALWAYS does it with the shittest excuses EVER. I've pulled her up on treating my like shit twice before and she's apologised but clearly has soon forgotten.

So this means I have a free evening and a kitchen full of food that needs eating. This is not good especially since i've eaten loads of chocolates today at work. Oink.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 01-May-13 19:53:57

The first rule is Don't Talk About BESH Club <trying to shoehorn in a pop culture reference>

Sorry about the crap friend Bugs. I hate it when people do that angry

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 19:55:48

(Jeffers, surely it's "no one talks about BESH club?")
(Or maybe it's instadiffers will not be tolerated?)

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 19:56:11

X post, soz Frank

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Wed 01-May-13 19:57:45

Yep me too Frank - She's so consumed in whats going on in her life (husband separation shit) that she 'forgets' the rest of us. I'm not arsed, she'll be back.

Just read 2 freds on MN re miscarriages and lots of the women are pregnant after several Mc's so I'm feeling hopeful again.

Norf how you didn't tell you're friends to fuck the fuck off i'll never know. You are way more restrained than me!

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Wed 01-May-13 19:59:56

Rules of BESH;

1 - No one talks about BESH club
2 - No googling
3 - No baybeedust
4 - The word hun is banned
5 - The phrase lol is banned
6 - Instadiffers are not welcome and will be shot
7 - Users of MN names that contain symbols will be shot

any more?

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 20:12:08

Lesboerotiviolence is encouraged tolerated.

JethroTull Wed 01-May-13 20:21:13

Love the rules Bugs. Good to hear you are feeling more hopeful again <tweaks nipples to please Hest>

Northey Wed 01-May-13 20:22:10

noks, you are hilarious and have cheered me right up.

I too am now trying to think of igloo names. Helga. Possibly.

JethroTull Wed 01-May-13 20:23:39

8. Forgetting the BESH rules once diffed means an instant slap with a large kipper will be applied.
9. The word 'relax' is not to be used in conjunction with TTC.

Northey Wed 01-May-13 20:26:19

Baybeedust is allowed but strictly for snorting through a rolled up twenty <drags mind back to Club Beshicana>

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 20:32:09

Those should be the rules for the next fred.

The instadiffers is a tricky one. We've had a few of those. I guess it's not their fault if they conceive. But we should still shoot them <bitter>

HesterShaw Wed 01-May-13 20:33:43

And how insta is insta?

And do we allow people with one child already? We always used to, but only as long as they were extra bitter and twisted and barren next time round. Some of the finest BESH have had their first baybee and were struggling the second time not as fine as me, obviously, I mean OBVIOUSLY

Northey Wed 01-May-13 20:42:11

I don't mind them being insta once they are here. But I do mind if they rock up and say they've only been trying a month but they just know something is wrong because their saliva isn't ferning or something, then get a bfp two pages later. That lot can fuck off.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 20:47:06

Omg I just looked up saliva ferning. I never knew examining your slobber was a thing.

Good rules.

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 20:48:38

10. You shall all be given bound editions of my 'No-one gives an arse' series. Bound with the skin of instadiffers and insensitive cuntbags.

hest heehee funny girl. Have you been listening to k d Lang again ? Sorry to hear of your polyectomy woes. Don't google fanjo ops, just play Constant Craving and watch an episode of Ellen.

cap'n a cheeky lap'n'dye eh ? Poor mini moll. sad

norf I am glad I made you smile. Sounds as though you have a plan though, which is brill after droid hell.

franks I want your job. I love horses but I have no idea how they work.

raff I aim to please grin. Are you ok ?

twonks sounds as though you had a nice ride. Are you an Essex girl then ??

euro I totally forgot about moon cups. Though all this talk of trimming and dropping them makes them sound less like a fanjo gadget and more like a pet.

bugs love the rules. There's lots of random shooting suggested, which I fully endorse.

jeff hello !

Sorry if I've missed anyone off. Can't go back to the previous page. Grrr.

I went for a run. An actual run. I did the first one of this C25K devilry thingy. I hated it. Yet felt brilliant afterwards. I shall go again on Friday. I saw my neighbour and her mum in their car. Luckily I had just finished.....she called me over to talk and I dripped sweat all over their shiny new BMW. Classy. I can feel myself seizing up on the sofa so I may have to get the WD40 out before beddybies.

Norks x

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 21:20:19

Well done norks! In answer to your question, yes but not by birth, and I'm only just outside the M25. I own no white stilettos, and have never said 'totes' or 'amazeballs' in conversation.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 01-May-13 21:23:01

Evening running and being meddled with hags! Just popping in to confirm my continued existence. Hes polyp removal? I've had a small one ever since the MC, it goes into hiding as my lining thickens and they claim it is fine!? Riding 4 days after L&D sounds overly hardcore, I felt rough for a week or so (mainly GA) and then thick for another two... I went for a nearly 4mile run on Sunday and have mainly sat on my bottom and eaten since then. Maybe tomorrow. On other news I am feeling very grumpy, but your stories of "f(r)iends" and the comic that is nokkie have cheered me right up. Btw twink trimming the moon cup and buying some fivers, perhaps?

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Wed 01-May-13 21:25:25

Btw signing up for the I don't give a damn series, plus ample copies to share around the self-involved diffed, mums and others.

No I don't care you - the useless husband of diffed friend - are being woken up at 7am, as she is in the final stages of pregnancy and very uncomfortable. Which bit of I DON'T CARE don't you get. Especially knowing we would give an arm and a leg to be in your position - or preferably a month ahead - ourselves. GRRRR.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 21:44:21

No fivers driz, my cycles are anything from 27 to 36 days long and I'm only having normal PMT symptoms. If there's no droid in a week's time I might consider POAICing. But that won't be necessary. Also - punch that husband in the nuts.

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 21:52:47

Cheers twonks . I feel good. Though fuck knows how long it will last, all this running lark. Essex is.....interesting. I went on a night out in Romford once. At the end of the night, I saw a tattooed sloppy breasted vodka addled cougar literally devour a dumb looking eighteen year old. It was like watching one of those snakes swallowing its prey whole. To be fair to the lad, he'd been duped. She was a BOBFOC. Body off Baywatch, face off Crimewatch.

drizz good on the running luv. Don't be grumpy. I shall try to cheer you up. Here, have some turbot. And a signed copy my bestseller 'stop whining, you cunt'. You can give it to diffed friend's husband.

JethroTull Wed 01-May-13 21:55:11

grin at BOBFOC. We say that round these parts too.

TWinklyLittleStar Wed 01-May-13 21:56:35

I've never been to Romford. I shall make a mental note to keep to that. You do have quite the way with words smile I would like 6 copies of 'stop whining you cunt' to distribute in the first instance please. I can think of several good homes for them.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 01-May-13 22:07:50

Arf @ BOBFOC! I was amused once to hear someone referred to as "A Kronenberg" - 1664. 16 from the back, 64 from the front grin Not very sisterly I know blush

Well done on the run Noks, I seized up after the first run. I was sceptical about the second one, but actually felt better and I've not had any muscle ache since. Ankles and shins take a good few hours to recover though. Thank god for the day off in between! I'm up at 6am for Run 2 of Week 2.

Night hags, try not to sacrifice too many instadiffers in the night. Bloods a bitch to get out of the carpet wink

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 22:09:25

jeff it's a good one, that. grin

twonks don't go there. It's ghastly. I shall send the books over right away. Six copies enough ?

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 22:11:02

Night night * franks*. Good to hear the first one is the worst. Keep up the good work. X. Run, Forrest. RUN.

evilgiraffe Wed 01-May-13 22:28:59

Aww, I was thinking I might be asking too much from surgery+ponies, but thanks all for making me more realistic. I shall ask the surgeon what he thinks, and play it by ear - I can at least pick an obliging horse and refrain from galloping about sad

Essex is weird. I'm automatically judgemental and snooty about it, but every time I'm there I'm struck by what a beautiful county it is.

My right leg is paying for my superspeedy cycling efforts. OUCH. <necks ibuprofen>

CaptainMoll Wed 01-May-13 23:00:40

I just had a lovely impromtu evening with some instadiffer friends of mine, who have a lovely baby. What makes them so particularly brilliant is that in the whole evening, they mentioned said infant once, when I asked how he was (he is well and has grown some teeth). They know about my barrenness, and asked how it was going once other friends had left. On hearing about impending surgery, they expressed exactly the right amount sympathy/concern and positivity, without veering into trite platitudes.
Why can't all parents be like that?

I love the rules of BESH.
I love BOBFOC and 1664

End of transmission. Sleep tight, BESHly ones.

Nokkie73 Wed 01-May-13 23:14:21

cap'n they sound lovely. May we adopt them as BESH mascots ? Nighty night. X

HesterShaw Thu 02-May-13 08:44:32

I missed BOBFOC. What's BOBFOC? <whines>

evilgiraffe Thu 02-May-13 09:07:09

Body off Baywatch, Face off Crimewatch, hest.

It's another glorious day! I've taken HOTB off to catch his train, he'll be home tomorrow evening, so I have many hours to run amok entertain myself. Whatever shall I do? <giddy with freedom>

HesterShaw Thu 02-May-13 09:13:33

I have to do a large amount of emailing, then painting <glum>

EuroShaggleton Thu 02-May-13 11:08:26

Morning hags!

Hest I was at an event last night (with Cherie Booth, dontcha know) and chatting to someone who is heading to your part of the world this summer. I recommended you. smile

Noks I'm placing an advance order.

Draf as a Kent girl, I'm kinda the same about Essex. I have a good friend who has moved out there and the village she lives in is lovely and you can get so much for your money.

moll what great friends. Could they start running some kind of seminar series for other friends of barrens?

HesterShaw Thu 02-May-13 11:17:50

Hi Euro, if Cherie and Tone turn up, I'll know who to thank!

EuroShaggleton Thu 02-May-13 20:00:59


BTW, I saw your query about NK cells on another thread. I was the same - rarely got ill, have some allergies and also Raynaud's which is another indicator. I had mine tested a couple of years back. One marker was sky high and another was borderline. I took steroids and various supplements for 6 months to try to moderate my immune system. At the end of it, I got my first ever abnormal smear and upon googling discovered that one of the risk factors for cervical abnormalities is that group of steroids! I had no idea. Anyway, I stopped taking them and my follow up smear was normal. I'm about to have another. If it stays normal I will be pretty sure that the steroids were to blame.

Anyway, I didn't get diffed despite the treatment (on the 6 cycles I was on the steroids I tried 3x superovulation, 2xIUI and we had one natural cycle while we were on holiday).

They seem to be a bit of a marmite issue - some drs believe in them and treat them aggressively; others are completely dismissive.

CaptainMoll Thu 02-May-13 20:28:38

I get reynauds. What are nk cells?

(Yes! A new paranoia!)
<polishes keyboard ready for googlage>
<remembers the second rule of BESH club>

EuroShaggleton Thu 02-May-13 21:04:20

As I understand it, moll, they are a component of the immune system. The thinking is that if the levels are too high, the body will reject an embryo as it is 50% foreign DNA. However, there is a lot of debate about whether the type of NK cells in the blood tells you anything about the levels of NK cells in the womb and even if it does that means anything for fertility stuff. I read up on it quite a bit and it makes a lot of sense to me, but my experience with the smear really freaked me out. What else was lowering my immune system doing? So I didn't have any treatment alongside my IVF.

There is loads of info over on Fertility Friends and the Prednisolone thread on this board is full of ladies who are having the steroid treatment for high NK cells.

Hello BESH. Long time no see. I have been off being selfish (working too hard) and evil (drinking too much) and trying to forget about my barren-ness. What news?

CaptainMoll Thu 02-May-13 21:21:55

What Ho Merks! Glad to see you.

HesterShaw Thu 02-May-13 23:19:07

I never get colds <arrogant>

RaspberrySnowCone Fri 03-May-13 07:34:13

So ...... Day 23 and I had LOADS of CM this more, like a bucket full, that means if I ov today, which might make sense as I've had a really sore lower back and stabby pains, ill be having a 37/38 day cycle. :/ we did manage to DTD when we woke up though, thought I'd escaped menkulling this month but obviously not now!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 03-May-13 07:52:27

I am nervously waiting for a call from SB, who's gone to see his GP about painful balls <menkul>

Quick wave...

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 03-May-13 08:02:25

Ouch lemon, that sounds, er, painful.

Happy shagging Bugs

Evil have you seen all the pictures/videos from the ST:ID premiere last night? They're all ver Twitter grin

evilgiraffe Fri 03-May-13 08:34:26

Not yet, Frank, I'm too scared of spoilers to go looking! Pictures will get posted up on my LJ comms pretty soon, though, I think.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Fri 03-May-13 09:51:03

I didn't see any spoilers evil, lots of hawt men in suits though wink

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Fri 03-May-13 09:57:48

Phew, unlikely to be anything properly sinister or anything to do with the general inability to conceive. Maybe an infection, maybe kidney stones, or maybe something else.

<Puts hands over ears against spoilers>

CaptainMoll Fri 03-May-13 10:40:37

Rasps, is this the end of the long dtd drought then?

EuroShaggleton Fri 03-May-13 10:57:28

Nice work rasp.

Welcome back merk. What's going on in merkinland at the moment?

drizz I'm glad it doesn't sound like anything too problematic.

evilgiraffe Fri 03-May-13 12:11:53

Hawt men in suits is a given, Frank! grin

Excellent work, rasp, and <phew> for Driz.

Just been for a ten-mile jolly - not really hammering it too much, but still keeping a nice high average speed. We're off to the pub for a friend's birthday later, and if HOTB gets home in time we'll ride there - it's a few villages away, so an easy six miles or so. It's been a long time since I've ridden in the dark, though! <wibble>

Ouch at painful balls. In merkinland I've generally been stropping about lack of baybee and doing nothing to help (including only having the sechs once in shag week last cycle). Due to O on Tue and off on hol with VVTM in the morn so would hope for some action in the sun however new job starts in June and I won't get maternity pay if upduffment happens before I start. Anyone want to bet who will win between law of sod or total barren-ness in the fight of whether I get diffed this month?? I'm so sure I will never get pg that I'm being rather blasé about it, but sure that wouldn't be the case if I wasn't getting paid during maternity leave!!

HesterShaw Fri 03-May-13 20:57:48

Rhod Gilbert is on.

Bet he goes like a train.....


CaptainMoll Fri 03-May-13 22:15:00

I am on a train. It has been moving very slowly for a very long time and is running an hour late.
I hope Rhod Gilbert goes much better than this.

TWinklyLittleStar Fri 03-May-13 23:19:50

I am at my parents house. I don't think Rhod could go faster than a plane. I think maybe tonight wasn't the best time to do my first sleep with my new mooncup - I am terrified I will leak onto my mum's sheets.

CaptainMoll Fri 03-May-13 23:58:38

I've never found moon up to be the tiniest bit leaky. Just make sure it's popped out into a full circle. Does that make sense? Run your finger round it.. Tmi? It's hard to explain hmm
I give up. Sleep tight!

CaptainMoll Fri 03-May-13 23:58:55

CUP not up.

Nokkie73 Sat 04-May-13 00:07:00

Rhod Gilbert. Yum yum.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 04-May-13 06:36:21

Certainly did mean end of the drought thankfully although this happened last time, nothing for weeks then a quickie then nothing again. Had loads more CM this morning and my back is still super sore? I had a horrendous migraine yesterday too, easily the worst I've had. I also cried on the doctor yesterday morning too sad he is going to try and find me a fertility counsellor and gave me some sleeping tablets to see if I can get a good nights sleep although to be honest I don't sleep too badly.

How did mooncup go Twink? I had a massive leak with mine first time I used it and haven't touched it since!

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Sat 04-May-13 07:38:10

Morning hags. Busy day for me today: just been for my run, got a dance lesson at 10, then we're at the races all afternoon.

Anyone see Graham Norton last night? Cumberbatch galore! Wasn't a fan of his hair, though I suspect he's got it long for Sherlock. He was so nice to the fans too <sighs happily>

Enjoy the long weekend hags grin

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 08:53:14

Running AND racing! Good gracious!

I have always been a fan of Rhod. I just find him extraordinarily sexy <fans self>

As well as funny obviously. I almost gave myself a hernia laughing when I saw him at the Apollo. It was the million candle torch sketch.

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 08:54:09

And ps, we haven't had anything approaching good sechs in bloody AGES.

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 08:54:44

Maybe I should have sex with Rhod <ponders>

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 04-May-13 09:38:25

Rhod and Cumberbatch together......I'd give it a go I reckon smile

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 09:40:03

Forget Cumberbatch. Just Rhod and me.

evilgiraffe Sat 04-May-13 10:21:53

I'm going to iplayer Graham; can't miss out on Captain Fine and The Batch! grin

I still feel smug after last night - cycling 4.5 miles each way to the pub entirely offsets the (delicious) three course meal. I can't be fucked to do anything today, though.

You're welcome to Rhod, hest, he's just a normal guy. I bet he'd put a lot of effort in - his shows always look exhausting. I loved candlepower and tog ratings and the award-winning mince pie, I cried laughing smile

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 10:40:50

Normal but FUNNY AND DEAD SEXY <firm.

evilgiraffe Sat 04-May-13 11:01:31

Funny, yes. Sexy, meh. Although he can probably sing (what with being Welsh and all), which is always a plus point.

CaptainMoll Sat 04-May-13 13:19:19

Draff, can't help thinking that would make for an off putting climax. Men of HaaaaaAaaAAAAAArlech.

RaspberrySnowCone Sat 04-May-13 14:34:25

Omg sunshine!!! Sat in the garden trying to get a tan. Typical Brit!

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sat 04-May-13 17:16:37

How were the races frank? Well done on the run! I am going to attempt to run more than 4 miles tomorrow. But we've been for a long and slow cycle ride and now I am completely shattered... Waves at speedy draf.

HesterShaw Sat 04-May-13 18:52:30

I always think I want hot weather. Then it gets above 22 degrees and I melt into a red, sweaty, ginger, rashy puddle. So attractive.

Nokkie73 Sat 04-May-13 19:29:54


I have only just had a shower. I have been well fucked off today. Saw my lovely best mate last night and she was telling me about one of her mates who I know quite well who has gone and got herself updiffed, basically to keep her flaky man. After three years of him basically mucking her about (he famously compared her to a moped - handy, but you wouldn't want to be seen on one) and various reinventions of their relationship, she 'forgot' her contraception for three fucking weeks and, like magic, she has a baybee in her tumtum. However, the father is a total dick, in my book. She suggested they go all Fifty Shades of Grey in one of their relationship reinventions. His took her to a laybye and spanked her with a wooden spoon until she begged him to stop. Which is hardly erotic, it's more like dogging with kitchen utensils. This story has resulted in the ole black dog of depression humping my leg all bloody day.