Elderberry Pavlovas Unite - the over 30s TTC number 1 (thread 3)

(997 Posts)
Bunnygirlie Sun 23-Dec-12 23:28:46

Hey ladies, we're over here!

bunnygirlie, 32, TTC since June, AF coming around New Year!
Twinklestar 2, TTC1, cycle 16, BFP was due 19/12
BraveLilBear,TTC
Lolcbcb,TTC
Aquarius,TTC
Happylass 34 cycle 4 BFP due Jan 1st
Navis176, 35, TTC #1, cycle 3 (this time around), bfp due around 19 Jan (I think…)
Neshie, 31, TTC #1, on cycle 9, after stopping the pill 18 months ago (took 10 months for AF to return!) BPF due 12th January Fx
MotherOfCleo TTC#1, cycle 3, 5dpo, BFP due New Years Day.
Viviennewestwould, 41, childless hag, TTC one year (mmc in March), on Clomid, ovulating today!
Pipbin 37 cycle 16 BFP due 26/12

Zombies, 32, almost 3 wks pg (by my calculation)- per standard 
measurement from LMP, 6 weeks pg, PCOS. 
MeanMrsMustard 31, 5 weeks pregnant. 
Quod,33, PG
Purplemonster, PG
Janey 38, 12 week scan on Christmas Eve
HazleNutt, due June 21st
Rach, 34, 13+4 pg, due 26th June

Apologies if I've missed you or got something wrong

Pipbin Sun 23-Dec-12 23:39:25

Evening ladies.
This is a nice shiney new thread.
Well I'm at the in laws but I've been I bed all evening as I am really rather unwell. BFP due on Wednesday but I doubt it as I've been spotting all day now.
At least it's not shag week, there would be no chance.

BelissimaLol Sun 23-Dec-12 23:39:57

Hey bunny
Can you update my details pls as I'm on phone?
I'm Lolcbcb but now BelissimaLol
Now almost 8 weeks pregnant. Scan on 22nd jan and panicking already!
Thanks for starting new Fred grin

twinklestar2 Sun 23-Dec-12 23:49:27

Please god make this be the last thread I join.

Been reading the infertility boards and about IVF. Scaring myself sad!

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Sun 23-Dec-12 23:52:44

twinkle I sincerely hope so too, that you get your BFP on this thread.

twinklestar2 Sun 23-Dec-12 23:57:50

Thanks zombie. I really need 2013 to be my year after 2011 and 2012 weren't.

Rache1S Mon 24-Dec-12 00:06:26

Evenin' all, hope you are all well?

Vivienne, you are hilarious! And I am very pleased to see you are also Northern like me as I have been outnumbered by Southerners until now. Well, we are still outnumbered but it helps!

Hazle I have a MW appointment on 14th January, which I think is just to test urine and a general chat about how things are going, and then I have the 20 week scan on 11th February. I am also tempted to pay for a gender scan at 16 weeks but DH says I am being ridiculous and we should just wait.

HazleNutt Mon 24-Dec-12 06:59:16

a tip to pregnant ladies - if your normal bras don't fit any more, borrowing one that's just bigger and doesn't fit properly either from a friend or mum is not an answer. I did that yesterday and ended up with a massive back ache - as I didn't do anything else differently, I can only deduct it must have been the bra.

Hm, an extra scan, you say Rach. I think I'll want to do that too - holidays on 9th of Feb and would be good to see that everything is still ok before that. I have doctors appointments every month but as said, I don't think I'll get a scan every time as well.

janey1234 Mon 24-Dec-12 09:08:48

Everyone loves and extra scan smile

Just popping in to say good luck to quod - scan day! I've just had my bloods taken and am waiting for mine at midday. Shitting it. And feeling slightly delirious after no sleep on plane and barely any sleep the night before. Left hotel 26 hours ago and just want my bed - too old for these shenanigans!

MotherOfCleo Mon 24-Dec-12 09:30:56

hello ladies grin
I have on odd symptom, doesnt exactly sound pregnancy related and sorry for tmi but im horny like all the time at the mo...bit random as its way past OV....guess my OH is just lucky lol. grin
Happy Christmas Eve everyone, hope everyone has a fab healthy Christmas with lots of BFPs! wink

Rache1S Mon 24-Dec-12 09:36:10

Hazle I wish my normal bras didn't fit! I was starting to get worried that BF would be out for me as my boobs haven't grown at all, but I had a chat with SIL yesterday and she told me hers didn't grow any bigger both times but she has still successfully BF 2 babies so I feel a bit better now.

I think the cost of a private scan is money well spent for peace of mind, especially if you're going away, and I think most places will tell you the sex after 16 weeks. I aren't going anywhere but I just really want to know the gender and it's only £79. DH thinks it is a waste of money when we are low risk and problem free (touch wood) but is going on a snowboarding holiday mid January so I might just have one while he is gone. <evil cackle>

viviennewestwould Mon 24-Dec-12 10:10:34

Janey and Quod, wishing you much luck at your scans.

I had a lovely hike in temp this morning just to confirm I ov'd yesterday. I feel so triumphant knowing I have four days' worth of sperm up there and we managed to DTD as I was ovulating, too! They do say, however, that sperm needs a good ten hours of being in situ before the egg is released. Any opinions? I so want yesterday's semen to count especially as it caused me so much discomfort as it was leaking out

HazleNutt Mon 24-Dec-12 10:22:53

janey and Qoud, we want to hear EVERYTHING and ASAP!

Rach as far as I've heard, your SIL is quite right, boob size and/or increase has nothing to do with breastfeeding success. I'm dreading any future increase, I'll have to shop in camping shops and sew a couple of tents together if it keeps going like this.

vivienne it certainly sounds like should have enough boys waiting there!

Preparing Christmas dinner here - we traditionally have it on Christmas Eve and not day, i.e tonight. PILs and SILs with families will come over and we have a card with the scan pic ready - I'll let you know what the reactions were.

viviennewestwould Mon 24-Dec-12 10:24:45

Oh, Hazle, what a smashing idea! I'm bloody well excited for you now!

janey1234 Mon 24-Dec-12 10:31:47

If all is well today the scan pic will be bright out later too. Great minds hazle!

Can't imagine it though, have the fear. An hour and a half to go. We're you this ridiculous hazle? I think having found out I'd had a mmc at 12 weeks last time is making me marginally more hysterical cautious than I'd be otherwise...

happylass Mon 24-Dec-12 10:32:02

Thinking of you janey and Quod. How lovely Hazle!! Exciting times all round grin

HazleNutt Mon 24-Dec-12 10:45:41

janey absolutely, I was preparing myself for the sonographer to say "oh, sorry, but..". Only normal I guess.

Rache1S Mon 24-Dec-12 11:04:53

Hazle how bizarre that we can be at such opposite ends of the boobage scale and still be classed as normal. This pregnancy malarkey is weird!

Good luck with your scans Janey and Quod! Seeing your little ones and getting your pictures will be such a lovely Christmas Eve treat grin

Vivienne if you've been bonking that much no wonder it's leaking out! Is it coming out of your ears as well? grin Sound like there was an army ready and waiting to ambush the egg!

ChristmAquarius1 Mon 24-Dec-12 11:06:34

Hello and Xmas greetings all! first bit of Internet access and /or spare time I've had for a while. Currently trying to avoid flooding in the south west. All those poor families whose homes are ruined- it's terrible- hope none of you are affected.

Winkle I hope this is your last thread too!

ChristmAquarius1 Mon 24-Dec-12 11:18:39

Ps hello new ladies vivienne and neshie smile
Pg ladies hope you all enjoy your first pg xmases!

BottleRed76 Mon 24-Dec-12 11:52:45

Ladies.
Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Been keeping all my mentalness to myself.
Sorry - not had a chance to read back over all the posts. Just been back to hospital this morning for last blood test. Saturday was 515, up from 198 on Thurs so keeping everything crossed it's still going up and I can get a heartbeat scan next week.
No reason it shouldn't except I'm just convinced it will all go tits up again.

Just updated the list

bunnygirlie, 32, TTC since June, AF coming around New Year!
Twinklestar 2, TTC1, cycle 16, BFP was due 19/12
BraveLilBear,TTC
Lolcbcb,TTC
Aquarius,TTC
Happylass 34 cycle 4 BFP due Jan 1st
Navis176, 35, TTC #1, cycle 3 (this time around), bfp due around 19 Jan (I think…)
Neshie, 31, TTC #1, on cycle 9, after stopping the pill 18 months ago (took 10 months for AF to return!) BPF due 12th January Fx
MotherOfCleo TTC#1, cycle 3, 5dpo, BFP due New Years Day.
Viviennewestwould, 41, childless hag, TTC one year (mmc in March), on Clomid, ovulating today!
Pipbin 37 cycle 16 BFP due 26/12

Zombies, 32, almost 3 wks pg (by my calculation)- per standard
measurement from LMP, 6 weeks pg, PCOS.
MeanMrsMustard 31, 5 weeks pregnant.
Quod,33, PG
Purplemonster, PG
Janey 38, 12 week scan on Christmas Eve
HazleNutt, due June 21st
Rach, 34, 13+4 pg, due 26th June
BottleRed76 36, 5 weeks pregnant

Right! Presents to wrap before DH gets home.
Have a cracking Christmas everyone and a very very lucky new year!X

Pipbin Mon 24-Dec-12 11:57:12

Off to see friend with new baby who only took 2 months to conceive s

Pipbin Mon 24-Dec-12 11:58:09

Soon, wish me luck.

Will not cry.

(Posted too soon, damn phone)

twinklestar2 Mon 24-Dec-12 12:00:42

Thinking of you pip x

Good luck with the scans.

twinklestar2 Mon 24-Dec-12 12:43:31

Cd1. Again. Month17.

Merry bloody Christmas.

HazleNutt Mon 24-Dec-12 12:46:23

Oh sorry twinkle

Quodlibet Mon 24-Dec-12 12:48:52

Sad news here. Scan showed only a gestational sack with small yolk etc so it looks like pregnancy hasn't developed since early days. We are gutted. Got to go back in a week so they can confirm a missed miscarriage. Right now trying to work out how to cope with a sad Xmas limbo and what to expect next - the hospital didn't tell us anything. I have had a bit of spotting in the last couple of days so perhaps it is already beginning.

Janey, I am sending positive thoughts your way and hope that you get your dose of scan happiness today.

BelissimaLol Mon 24-Dec-12 12:52:10

OMG quod I'm so so sorry to hear that. You must be beyond sad. Lots of hugs and kisses from me xx

janey1234 Mon 24-Dec-12 12:59:48

Oh quod, I'm so so sorry, devastating news. God how bloody awful for you both.

All ok here thanks.

Gutted for you. Sending big hugs xxx

happylass Mon 24-Dec-12 13:20:18

Oh Quod I'm so, so sorry. That's absolutely devastating. Sending lots of love and hugs. Take care xx

twinklestar2 Mon 24-Dec-12 13:21:26

Oh quod, so sorry to hear that. Devestated for you x

Rache1S Mon 24-Dec-12 13:25:58

Quod I am so so sorry to hear your news. Nature is so cruel sometimes. I can't imagine what you must be going through but I think there are some very good support threads by people who are experiencing similar. Sending all my best wishes for the best Christmas you can possibly have xxx

MeanMrsMustard Mon 24-Dec-12 13:50:10

Quod, I am so sorry. Xxx

Quodlibet Mon 24-Dec-12 14:18:09

Thank you all. Janey I am really happy on a dark day to hear that yours is all good. Hopefully that will be us next time.

viviennewestwould Mon 24-Dec-12 14:27:52

Quod, I am so, so sorry about this news. I, too, was told at my 12 week scan that there was only an empty sac and placenta. The baby had failed to develop very early on. It's shit and cruel and I hope you can heal somewhat over the holidays. If you want any advice on what to do over the coming days please private message me (I don't want to go into details on here as it could be insensitive to those who are pregnant). Please be reassured that this sadness passes. Hope renews itself very quickly and you will have your longed-for baby. Stay close to those who love you and, although this will seem cold comfort to you at the present time, remember 'this, too, will pass..'

Much love and empathy thanks

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Mon 24-Dec-12 14:43:06

quod I'm so sorry to hear your news sad
janey hope things continue well for you.

MotherOfCleo Mon 24-Dec-12 14:44:27

viv that is a lovely message. quod I am so sad to hear your sad news, so so unfair! sad thinking of you on this shitty day sad

heres to a happy healthy 2012! xx

MotherOfCleo Mon 24-Dec-12 14:45:10

janey thats awesome, smile so pleased for u

HazleNutt Mon 24-Dec-12 14:51:33

Quod, so sorry - as it stopped developing early, the mc should not be (physically) too traumatic, but I understand that this is not something you really care about right now. It does not mean it's more likely to happen the next time either, but still of course devastating news.

Janey glad to hear everything was ok with yours!

yorkiebilb Mon 24-Dec-12 15:24:12

Hello, was wondering if I could re-join? I did join a while ago but fell pg and had a mmc diagnosed about 2 weeks ago at 8 wks. now currently waiting for AF before we start ttc again. I'm 34.

Quod really sorry to hear about your mmc. There are some really good threads on here that have helped me over the past couple of weeks.

twinklestar2 Mon 24-Dec-12 17:25:55

Welcome back Yorkie. Sorry to see you back.

Good news Janey.

Pipbin Mon 24-Dec-12 17:28:34

Quiod thinking of you, dreadful news. Have you got anyone other than DH in real life who can support you?

Didn't cry seeing friends baby, mainly because I was sitting in a coffee shop concentrating on not shitting myself.

viviennewestwould Mon 24-Dec-12 18:21:23

Yorkie, bless you, too, after your sad loss. I hope you find peace in the New Year thanks

viviennewestwould Mon 24-Dec-12 18:23:15

Pip, you crack me up. Hoorah! for squirty poo distracting you from babies grin

Neshie Mon 24-Dec-12 18:41:00

Kind thoughts to Quod and Yorkie thanks. I hope you are both able to enjoy Christmas x

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Mon 24-Dec-12 20:18:53

Hugs to you yorkie.

viviennewestwould Tue 25-Dec-12 07:38:44

Dear Santa,

What happened to my Esteé Lauder Double Wear foundation and cashmere socks? Dick.

Viv

HazleNutt Tue 25-Dec-12 08:45:54

Morning all - so told the family, reactions as you would expect.

One BIL was not feeling so great and turns out has conveniently managed to catch some kind of vomiting bug, I will not be amused if I get it too now.

Now waiting for everybody to get up for their traditional French breakfast (toast and jam), while I'll be eating mine - they think that savory breakfast is the oddest thing ever.

Merry Elderberry Christmas!

Rache1S Tue 25-Dec-12 09:00:46

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope Santa has been kind grin

I was looking forward to a my last Christmas lie in as I doubt baby will let us have one next year. Woke up at at 6.45 really excited. I am such a child!

Hazle Toast and jam? Those French are just too healthy! <listens to sausages sizzling in the kitchen> I too have Norovirus all over the family hmm Fingers crossed neither of us get it.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Tue 25-Dec-12 09:16:12

Merry Christmas all!

I'm not sure if its a virus or just the flu here but I hope I don't catch it too smile

BelissimaLol Tue 25-Dec-12 09:51:20

Morning lovelies. Hope u all have a lovely Xmas! About to enjoy a salmon and scrambled egg breakfast grin

HazleNutt Tue 25-Dec-12 11:13:55

Oh dear, PILs want to stay for another day. They're lovely, really, but elderly and not very active, no idea what to do with them now. FIL rarely speaks and MIL speaks all the time mixing French, German and Alsatian, forgetting I don't really understand 2 of them, it's quite tiring.
(ok I should consider myself lucky that this is my biggest problem, but was kind of looking forward to a day on the sofa in my pyjamas..)

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Tue 25-Dec-12 14:25:34

Wow hazle your child is going to be splendidly multilingual!

HazleNutt Tue 25-Dec-12 15:26:20

Zombies, that's actually a bit worrying. We would speak French, Estonian and English at home, grandparents speak Alsatian (French as well, but they forget and switch back) and our village primary school is French/German bilingual. Will certainly be a challenge..

MotherOfCleo Tue 25-Dec-12 17:16:09

merry christmas everyone! Ive had very light spotting today, really really hope its implantation! grin 7dpo so fingers crossed i get a BFP by New Year :-) xx

Happy Christmas everyone hope you all get what you want this year

Quod so sorry about your sad news

Bunnygirlie Tue 25-Dec-12 23:43:53

Oh Crikey, I logged on hoping to read of happy scans and people telling their loved ones at Christmas, quod so so sad to hear your news, hugs x

Here's hoping that next Christmas we all have a little person with us x

Bunnygirlie Tue 25-Dec-12 23:45:25

twinkle it won't be the last thread you join, we shall FX soon have an Elderberry PG thread x

twinklestar2 Wed 26-Dec-12 10:59:01

I really hope so bunny.

Pipbin Wed 26-Dec-12 15:45:24

Well AF still isn't here and the spotting has eased up. However this is all standard and given how ill I've been I wouldn't be surprised if she holds off for a couple if days anyway.

viviennewestwould Wed 26-Dec-12 15:53:53

Pip, illness would only make AF late if it occurred at ovulation. Were you ill then?

Pipbin Wed 26-Dec-12 17:35:22

This is true Viv, and I know when I ov'd so she should show up tomorrow regardless I guess.

viviennewestwould Wed 26-Dec-12 17:54:49

Fingers crossed you are pregnant, Pip. How many DPO are you? Do you hold off testing unless your period is late?

Pipbin Wed 26-Dec-12 18:03:34

13 DPO today, AF usually shows on 14.

HazleNutt Wed 26-Dec-12 18:50:51

Berries, what's the opinion about those fetal doppler monitors you can buy, get one or no? On the one hand, reassuring to check between scans, but then again according to internet opinions, it's not always easy to find the heartbeat, so in this case we would of course panic massively. Will you get one?

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Wed 26-Dec-12 19:09:41

hazle I read an article where it said that a number of women had thought there still was a heartbeat when there was none (turns out they were listening to the blood in their own body circulating) so without the Doppler they would've gone to their doctors immediately but as they were lulled into a false sense of security it took them more time to go.
Obviously it would be in a minority of cases that this would even be relevant..

navis176 Wed 26-Dec-12 19:27:41

Hope everyone had a fab Christmas smile. Although it sounds like everyone has been having bad news - not what was ordered from santa sad

Quod - really sorry to hear your news [big hug] – I hope you’re not feeling too shitty even though it’s a mega sad time

Yorkie - hi [waves] – sorry to hear about your mmc – been there 4 times myself and it’s shit

Janey - glad all is good with you

Pip - fx for tomorrow

Bunnygirlie Wed 26-Dec-12 20:07:58

Evening all, AF due on new years eve and a bit of light spotting started today so I guess she's coming early. Got the pre AF itch (sorry tmi) too so I know she is just around the corner sad

FX for you pip

Who else is due AF or poas?!?

janey1234 Wed 26-Dec-12 20:13:32

Hey everyone, and happy Christmas.

Pip - got everything crossed for you that the evil bitch doesn't pop by tomorrow...

Hazle - when I had my scan on Xmas eve out of the blue she just said that I should NOT get a Doppler. She said that she sees so many people stressing because they can't hear the heartbeat, when all is fine, and that the stress isn't good for you. She also said that loads of people think their heartbeat is the baby's. I don't think I'll be getting one as I think I'd be in a constant state of worry!

janey1234 Wed 26-Dec-12 20:13:57

Oh and bunny - hope your prediction is incorrect....

Fingers crossed Pip

HazleNutt Wed 26-Dec-12 20:22:54

thanks janey. Yes, it's probably a better not to - considering the constant OMG symptoms have disappeared panic, I don't even want to imagine the can't-find-heartbeat one.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Wed 26-Dec-12 20:27:19

pip bated breath for you!

Pipbin Wed 26-Dec-12 20:37:00

Thanks guys, but I know she is on her way, I've had my regular red spotting.

viviennewestwould Wed 26-Dec-12 20:50:42

Sorry, real non-problem here, but my post-ov temps are quite a bit lower than recent months (I'm 3DPO). Should I be worried? They're still well above the coverline.

escorpion Wed 26-Dec-12 23:19:01

Just marking my place again. Hope you all had a great Christmas. haven´t visited for a while as I had been planning my wedding. Now married and post Christmas feeling a lot less stressed.

escorpion ttc#1, 32, cycle 3

(only managed to get a quick festive shag in this cycle due to family visiting over Christmas but hohoho) wink

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Thu 27-Dec-12 05:26:01

Have fever (so angry about that but it's a helpless rage). Also no morning sickness or anything- a reduction in general symptoms too.
I fear the worst and am trying to make my peace with it now.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Thu 27-Dec-12 05:26:45

Congratulations escorpion on your marriage!

HazleNutt Thu 27-Dec-12 06:56:10

congratulations escorpion!

zombies I think most pregnant ones here have experienced the disappearing symptoms, not necessarily anything to worry about, fx!

BottleRed76 Thu 27-Dec-12 08:22:02

Quod So sorry to hear your news. I hope you've managed to find some comfort over xmas x

escorpion Congratulations!

zombies I had a meltdown on Sunday because my boobs weren't sore anymore.... next HCG result was good so it doesn't necessarily mean bad news. But, yes I did start making my peace thinking it was another mc.

Last HCG blood on Monday showed levels had doubled again, and I have a reassurance scan booked for a week tomorrow. Xmas with family has definitely helped me to start to relax. Have even got baby books out. This time really does feel different.

Question for you. At 6 week scan is it normal scan or Dildocam?

HazleNutt Thu 27-Dec-12 08:36:40

Bottle in my case it was dildocam.

Pipbin Thu 27-Dec-12 10:42:29

And AF shows her ugly face true to form.
At least I have a 13 day LP.

Right Twinkle, you and me off to cycle, what is it now, 17?
Except there will be no ttcing for me as I have my lap and dye booked for the 18th.

twinklestar2 Thu 27-Dec-12 11:04:11

So sorry pip. We're both on cycle 17 - we should be planning on when to have our second one, not still waiting for our first. Good luck with the lap and dye. I'm calling the doc on 2nd Jan to get an appt to get referred. Lap and dye is our next stage too.

viviennewestwould Thu 27-Dec-12 11:09:19

Zombie, I do hope your worries are unfounded thanks

Pip, I'm sorry, love thanks

Ladies, please can you help me? I hate to bore you when others are properly worrying on here but I'm at 4DPO and this morning's temp has dropped below the coverline [wails]. Would you please put down your Times/DH/croissant/gin and take a look at my chart? Please? I'm refusing to leave the house to go to Tesco until someone reassures me I could still technically be preggo with these temps:

www.fertilityfriend.com/home/viviennewestwould

Pipbin Thu 27-Dec-12 11:19:40

Could be very early implantation Viv.

navis176 Thu 27-Dec-12 11:33:21

escorpion Congratulations!

viv - sorry don't know anything about temping!!

pip - sorry to hear that sad

HazleNutt Thu 27-Dec-12 11:50:48

same here viv, would love to help but I simply used a monitor, so no idea about the temperature.

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 14:53:00

Viv I can't see your chart as I am at PIL's on my rubbish phone, but my temperature dropped below cover on the month I got knocked up. I think it was around 10 DPO though. FX this is what yours is.

Bunnygirlie Thu 27-Dec-12 18:01:25

Crikey even after you get that BFP there is still so much worry, stress stress stress until you get that little person in your arms I guess

Sorry viv I know nowt about temping

Congrats escorpian

Oh pip that's crap! Just waiting for AF here too, due new years eve and I can tell she is a coming sad

HazleNutt Thu 27-Dec-12 18:15:24

bunny I have this odd nagging feeling that the stress and worry doesn't end with that either grin

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 18:42:02

Hazle Coincidentally my SIL has given me her doppler today. I doubt I would have bought one myself as I am well aware I am a doom monger at the best of times and I don't think it will be particularly good for my sanity, but I am now very tempted to use hers. In fact I know I will have a go at some point so I will report back either very relaxed by what I think is the calming sound of our baby's heartbeat, or more likely out of my mind with worry at the sound of bleak silence in my belly hmm

Sorry AF got you Pip. Onwards and upwards for a baby-filled 2013 smile

Congratulations Escorpion!

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 19:38:15

Ok so I told myself I wasn't going to use it until after my holiday in case I couldn't find the heartbeat and the worry ruined my trip, but this steely determination lasted about the same amount of time I managed not to POAS half an hour before curiosity meant I abandoned my packing and decided to have a bash at it. I put some baby oil on and gently positioned the sensor and there it was straight away! I couldn't believe how easy it was, how fast it was and what a wonderful and distinctive sound it was. I tried it in loads of different positions to make sure it wasn't the sound of blood pumping or my dinner digesting but I am certain it was our baby's heartbeat beating like the clappers as I could only hear it when the doppler was on an area about 1 inch square right in the middle of my abdomen, just above my pubic bone. I am so glad I did it and feel on quite a high now. I think I will treat myself again before bed grin grin grin

sorry she got you pip.
Bit of a question, I know that announcing your pregnancy or posting scan pics on Facebook is a big no no as it ends up inadvertently upsetting people who are ttc but how are you supposed to tell people you don't ordinarily see? Do I just not tell them at all? I'm confused and I don't want to hurt any feelings either way please advise wise berries

captainmoll Thu 27-Dec-12 19:47:41

Hi all, popping in to say hi to new peeps, and sorry to hear the sad news from some of you. Big hugs and fx for a better 2013. Not much going on here as I'm waiting for my gynaecologist appointment beginning of jan to deal the Humperdink lump on my ovary.

Purple - maybe send a group email with the scan pic? I can't bear fb at the moment - so many new babies turned up this summer that it's a constant stream of happy families. Lovely for them all but so painful for me. Thought I'd be doing the 'first Christmas' thing by now. I did spend the last few days with my lovely new nephew though, which was equal parts heaven and hell.

Bunnygirlie Thu 27-Dec-12 19:48:04

purple I put everything on Facebook so I would def post on there if I ever get a BFP, I'm happy to see other peoples happy news even if it makes me feel blue for a while.

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 20:19:55

Purple I was 'outed' on FB by my Sister last week. She just made a small comment but it was enough to let the cat out of the bag, so at least it saved me the dilemma you currently have. I haven't mentioned it since though and don't intend to because it annoys me when others bang on about their pregnancy and babies too much and I don't intend to turn into one of them!

HazleNutt Thu 27-Dec-12 20:23:15

I'll use facebook eventually, but preferably only after the sprog is born. Still paranoid and there would be a lot of people to un-tell if there's anything wrong..

Have doc's appointment tomorrow, guess he will want to weigh me. I have not stepped on the scale but I have a feeling I'll get a stern telling off. But it's christmas, everybody puts on like 5 kilos, pregnant or not, right?

Hmm I'm inclined not to mention it as I can't stand people banging on about it on Facebook and don't want to be one of them. Suppose I've told the people I'm bothered about knowing already. I don't use Facebook much anyway
Hazel everyone gets chubby at Christmas don't they? It's a good excuse!

happylass Thu 27-Dec-12 22:22:32

Hi all. Quick question Rach. I'm 10dpo and my temp had dropped slightly below the cover line. Was beginning to think it was game over until I read your reply to Viv. Did your temp go back up again after it dropped? Tis my first month temping so have no idea what is normal. Also just recovering from a touch of the lurgy, so of course is probably that!

viviennewestwould Thu 27-Dec-12 22:37:29

Thanks, ladies, for responding about my temps. I am throwing away my thermometer immediately after tomorrow morning when I've checked my temp has risen again

Happy, I do believe implantation dips exist on some women's charts. Indeed, if you look at mine from January, when I fell pregnant, there is a distinct drop in temp at 7DPO. Implantation is likely to take place around day 9 (not day 7 as previously thought) although it can happen as early as day 6 and as late as day 12. You and I will have to see what tomorrow brings, eh? wink

I feel frigging fantastic after only an hour of weight training tonight. I was almost beating the door of the gym down!

Rache, on reading about your session with the monitor I was grinning from ear-to-ear. So envious yet so happy to read something so heart-warming smile

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 23:01:26

Hi Happy, I only temped for one cycle so my experience is not exactly vast, but I did dip below cover at 10 DPO on the month I got pregnant so it sounds very promising for you. I have everything crossed for you! My temperature carried on going up after the implantation dip but did not shoot up straight away. My sleep became quite disturbed and I was very restless but I didn't have any other symptoms. I have put my chart below showing the dip, I hope it helps.
www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3f7894

Thanks Viv, I can never work out whether it's insensitive for us PG ladies to give happy news when so many on here are still trying, but I really hope it doesn't upset or offend anyone and I really don't intend it to. I am so desperate for you all to get your BFPs!

Rache1S Thu 27-Dec-12 23:06:29

I should probably add that 36.5 is my cover, it's just that some readings are missed off!

viviennewestwould Thu 27-Dec-12 23:41:14

Rache, I, for one, am warmed by such little tidbits as you gave us tonight. Would it be unforgivably creepy of me to ask what your intercourse frequency pattern was when you got pregnant? Ignore me if you wish, I just am interested to know how people get to that elusive BFP, you know? It all seems so long ago for me..

MotherOfCleo Fri 28-Dec-12 00:19:47

ahh Rache thats lovely, I love to hear the news from the lucky PG ladies grin cant wait till I can join ur club! wink

happylass Fri 28-Dec-12 08:17:05

Thanks Rach. Temp has gone back up slightly this morning. Can't read too much in to it as not been feeling 100% plus not been v consistent with timings since being off work. AF due in a few days so all will be revealed shortly......
Another vote here for the lovely stories. Keep 'em coming!

Bunnygirlie Fri 28-Dec-12 08:27:55

Hi y'all!

Quick TMI question, what do you count as spotting? Actually red stuff? The last few days I have had very very pale pinkish when I wipe which is a little brown in my knix. AF due mondayish.

I wish the witch would hurry up and arrive so I can get on with the next month of trying!!!

MotherOfCleo Fri 28-Dec-12 09:46:46

Hi Bunny, my spotting started pale pink, went a little redder then brown....sorry for tmi. It started xmas day, stopped boxing day until we dtd then I got a little bit more. I did a hpt yesterday (yes im impatient) smile but got a bfn sad then I read that it takes 6 days after implantation for the hormones to be enough for a hpt to pick up.....so im not totally disheartened yet. I'll test again on Sunday.....FX!

Rache1S Fri 28-Dec-12 09:52:33

Viv We DTD every day pretty much that month, but I think quite a few of them were after work rather than bed time so no idea if that made the difference grin

escorpion Fri 28-Dec-12 12:19:08

Thanks all for the congrats! Just need by BFP now and I will be so smile
Rache I actually like hearing when others in the group get their BFPs, and hearing their journey´s, it will be our time soon!

HazleNutt Fri 28-Dec-12 14:07:09

So had doc's appointment today and all is well. But what a surprise, have only put on 1 kilo - I usually put on more over Christmas even without being pregnant. Funny that I look feel like an average sized sea lion then..

janey1234 Fri 28-Dec-12 14:17:57

Yes Hazle, I've out on the same after five days in Dubai, 17 nights in Thailand and Christmas! Weird I haven't put on more. Still feel enormous.
Booking in appt today - midwife was just lovely. Talked about birth options and surprisingly she said I could just choose, and if I wanted a c section, I could have one. So need to tell her at my next appt in four weeks what I'm thinking. Really not sure what I want but know I do not want forceps... Or an emergent section...

HazleNutt Fri 28-Dec-12 15:47:57

I was always thinking that planned c-section is the way to go. Then had minor surgery earlier this year and found it so unpleasant, that I'm not letting anybody near me with a scalpel if I can help it. Agree with you on the forceps topic though. So I'll probably try the traditional way, with epidural and all other possible drugs I can get my hands on.

janey1234 Fri 28-Dec-12 15:56:06

She was telling me that if you have an epidural, in the uk at least, 60-70% end up having an assisted birth (forceps or ventouse). In over 35's you're also apparently about three times as likely to have an emergency c-section. Aargh what to do!

HazleNutt Fri 28-Dec-12 16:06:07

I guess they get more practice here, about 75-80% of women in France get an epidural and I haven't heard of high forceps delivery rates. Will have to check that though.

Bunnygirlie Fri 28-Dec-12 18:52:20

Oh goodie, the bitch has arrived 3 days early FFS!!!

Having a vino to 'celebrate' sad Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

happylass Fri 28-Dec-12 18:57:07

So sorry to hear that Bunny. She's due to visit me in a few days and I can already feel her creeping up on me sad

janey1234 Fri 28-Dec-12 18:59:04

Oh I'm sorry bunny. Old boot that she is.sad

viviennewestwould Fri 28-Dec-12 21:43:15

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Fri 28-Dec-12 22:05:41

viv take my advice. Hide that thread. Never go back to it. It's just not worth it. Later when you have your BFP you can go back and read it with chagrin.
Hugs.

MotherOfCleo Fri 28-Dec-12 23:03:32

ahhh Viv, that womans obv got herself in a big old mess. I agree, hide that thread and dont put yourself thru the pain! Altho Im not one to talk I have an evil friend who I have hidden on FB but I go on her profile every now and again just to upset myself (shes a spiteful piece of work and is now PG with #2)....women are complicated creatures huh xx

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 02:07:46

Hello everyone. I'm tentatively creeping into this thread, feeling a little bit like the ugly duckling, desperately hoping for acceptance as I'm not over 30 (though will be in a few weeks).

I know I'm not quite fulfilling entry criteria (!) but I am now onto my 17th cycle of TTC and I just need somewhere to hide away from all that fresh-faced optimism of the 'cycle 1' ladies in the 'bus' threads! I've looked at the TTC 10+ months thread too but the thread moves really quickly and I just can't keep up with it!

So, in the hope that I can join you all in here:

Boodle9, (nearly) 30, Cycle 17, having scans this month

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Sat 29-Dec-12 09:39:29

Welcome boodle!!

Bunnygirlie Sat 29-Dec-12 10:04:16

Welcome boodle you young un! You will find this a good bunch of lovely ladies with lots of good advice and experiences, good and bad to share.

I had to get up at 4am this morning for some drugs for the ripping sensation in my womb, that was fun! I knew this wasn't our month but I was still hoping I guess!

BelissimaLol Sat 29-Dec-12 10:08:58

OMG panic over! Thought I lost you for a minute!
Caved in and bought a maternity bra from debenhams yesterday. Best 15 quid I've ever spent! Went for 34D when I'm normally a C and thought it looked massive- until I put it on and filled it completely!
DH said to me- what's the point in these amazingly big boobs if you won't let me play? Bless him.
Hope you all had a lovely Xmas.
Where is quod? Hope u ok hun x

janey1234 Sat 29-Dec-12 10:42:43

I know, I miss quod too. sad
If you're there, lovely, we're all thinking of you...
I need maternity bras too, mine are all way too small AND really painful too.
Poor bunny...

ChristmAquarius1 Sat 29-Dec-12 12:39:03

Hello all back in the land of Internet after spending Xmas in what seemed like middle of nowhere down on the s west.

quod I'm so sorry. Just so unfair.

bunny boo to af and middle of the night pains - been there sad

Hello boodle you'll find an incredibly understanding &supportive group of ladies here.

Rache1S Sat 29-Dec-12 13:21:20

Greetings from NYC! It's 8am and there is a 30 minute news report coming up on the unmentionable royal upduffedness. And they seem to think Zara is in the club as well. Is there nowhere in the world I can go to escape this shit?!!

Welcome boodle!

Sorry about AF Bunny. Here's to a drunken New Year for you though.

Welcome Boodle. Sorry Bunny.
For my part I'm a bad bad pregnant lady. What with Christmas and a stinking cold I completely forgot to book my 20 week scan which apparently MUST be booked within a week of your 12 week scan which was well over a week ago. Oops. Surely they understand my brain no longer works properly though?

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 16:30:36

Phew...thank you all for welcoming me! I haven't even looked at your first 2 threads yet and am already learning plenty. For example, I didn't even know Doppler monitors existed and as for the 'dildocam'...! grin I'm off for one of those in a couple of weeks and I can't quite decide if that nickname has made me feel better or worse!

Pipbin Sat 29-Dec-12 18:29:58

Welcome Boodle. Seems you can join Twinkle and I on the 'double figures of cycles' gang. Have you been to the GP yet? As you are a nipper you need to have been trying for longer than 12 months.

captainmoll Sat 29-Dec-12 19:18:41

Hi boodle!
Sorry Bunny hmm Good luck for the next round..

Just felt I had to jump on the earlier chat re c sections. A friend of mine had to have one as her baby hadn't turned properly, so I learnt quite a bit about them for her and her medically trained sister and a doctor friend:

Lots of v important stuff happens to the baby on the way out during natural birth - the pressure as it passes through the cervix gets its bowels working properly, squeezes the fluid out of the lungs and fuses the bones in the skull. The passage out essentially wakes the baby up and gets all it's organs working.

Natural birth also releases a massive dose of oxytocin in both mother and baby. This is the "love hormone" that plays a major role in forming the strong bond of love between mother and child. Obviously I'm not saying c-section mums can't love their children - the bond between my friend and her baby is enormously strong, and oxytocin is present in large quantities from around 8 months (it's what makes mums-to-be all floaty and ditzy and happy), But the highest peak of oxytocin in a child-bearing woman's life is at the point of birth.

There's also the issue of scarring which can weaken the womb and make more babies slightly more risky. The main thing my friend found re this is that taking a week to recover from what is pretty major surgery was v frustrating as she wanted to be able to pick her new baby up and be more active and able early into being a mum.

I hope this post doesn't seem preachy - i believe its every woman's choice, and we should be given all the info in an unbiased way to make the right choices for us. I was just so fascinated by how much goes on 'behind-the-scenes' during birth, so just wanted to share.

I have to say,having looked into it, if I ever get my BFP, I'm def going to be hoping for natural birth if at all possible. (Ask me what I think when I'm screaming for the epidurals and gas-and-air!!)

Griffomais Sat 29-Dec-12 19:29:15

Hi can I join please? TTC 27 months (unexplained infertility) AF due tomorrow just in time to spoil NY celebrations :0(

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Sat 29-Dec-12 19:30:49

Welcome griff!! We are a very welcoming bunch smile

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 19:39:53

Hi back at you captainmoll and Pipbin! That's a really interesting post, captainmoll - I had no idea about all the physical benefits for the baby during a natural birth (the bowel and lungs and stuff)!

At the risk of sounding slightly stalkerish, Pipbin, I had noticed you and twinkle already, due to the double figures thing you've also pointed out!

My situation: Cycle 17 started for me on Christmas Day (thanks for that one, Santa - two years in a row) and I am currently underway with seeing GP. Started back in September with initial blood tests that suggested some possible thyroid problems but it was all a bit borderline. (TSH of 4.6 followed by 3.9 if that means anything to anyone). I have now been booked in for a 'transabdominal' and 'transvaginal' (dildocam!) scan on 17th Jan to see if anything else could be going on.

My gut instinct is that the thyroid thing could be my problem. I have quite a lot of symptoms associated with it and whilst I do usually ovulate, I definitely have a luteal phase issue - 7 days is typical, 9 at absolute best. Have read some stuff online that suggests there may be a link but there doesn't seem to be any real, hard evidence that I can confidently take back to GP.

Meanwhile, hubby has had SA done which suggested slightly low motility and morphology; he now has to get a repeat done, and that's pretty much where I'm at.

Not feeling very optimistic about 2013 at the moment. As many of you can relate to, everyone around me seems to be popping out babies, including close family members, and it seems all set to continue next year...I just want to hide from it all!

Urgh! What a long, self-indulgent post. Not very good form for a new poster - must try harder!

captainmoll Sat 29-Dec-12 20:05:18

Hi to Griffo too - sorry to hear about your long ttc. It sucks. Welcome to our very BFPful thread - all the best for the new year, hope this is the time for you.

Boodle, I'm in a similar situation. Ttc for about 17 months. I had the scan/dildo scan at the beginning of Dec after blood tests all came back normal. They found a 5cm wide dermoid cyst on my left ovary, which may or may not be part of the issue, but will require surgery confused.

DH hasn't made it to have his tests done yet but is due to go in the next couple of weeks, so we wait to find out where he's at.

I'm not allowed to ttc til the cyst is removed, as surgery with foetus is bad. This makes for a frustrating start to 2013, esp as my naughtily hoped for "sods law" BFP is not happening - AF and a massive chin-spot both appeared this morning!

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 20:43:57

captainmoll, definitely not the way you want to start a new year. How long do you have to wait for the surgery? I hate the chin-spot! I always get one in the whole, lovely PMS package (along with sore boobs and bouts of crying over nothing)!

HazleNutt Sat 29-Dec-12 20:44:13

Boodle, other countries now consider 3 as the max limit for TSH, so you would be considered hypo already. And recommended max for women ttc is 2,5 - being hypo definitely affects fertility.
I would also see if you can get your T3 and T4 tested, just TSH might not give a full picture.

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 20:52:45

Thanks HazleNutt - I've read a bit about that online; I've got to go back to the doctor after my scans so maybe I should brave it and bring what you have said up with her. I'd love to find a real, proper medical journal article with it in so that I could print it out and take it along with me! A lot of what I've found just comes from forums and you're never quite sure where it originated! I think she tested my T3 and T4 and just said they were 'normal' but I've learnt now that I should have asked for the numbers!

HazleNutt Sat 29-Dec-12 21:19:06

the guidelines from American Association of Endocrinologists:
thyroid.about.com/cs/testsforthyroid/a/labs2003.htm

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 21:40:08

smile HazleNutt, that's exactly what I wanted - thank you! I think I've even read that before (the bit about the skewed reference range rings bells) but even if I did,I definitely didn't have the sense to bookmark it.

Do you, (or anyone else for that matter) have thyroid problems, or is that just knowledge you've picked up?

HazleNutt Sat 29-Dec-12 21:50:51

yes, I had Graves disease and my thyroid taken out earlier this year, so I did a lot of reading. We half-heartedly ttc before I was diagnosed, nothing happened. After surgery it took a few months to get my thyroxine replacement dose right, but then got pregnant straight away. My TSH is now 0,3 and this is what works for me.

Boodle9 Sat 29-Dec-12 21:55:30

I'm sorry that you had to go through all that, but it's great that once you were sorted, pregnancy happened straight away!

I think once New Years is out of the way, I will get myself back to the doctor armed with that information!

Quodlibet Sat 29-Dec-12 22:19:11

Hello all, just popping in to say thanks for kind words and that I am bearing up. Heading back to London tmw for a rescan and most probably EPRC on Monday. Happy fucking new year! To top everything off our car has broken down and we are having to leave it here and get the train back. Feeling quite royally shat on tbh, and staying away from MN so as not to spread doom and gloom. But I am doing ok and being looked after, and hopefully this limbo will be over soon, at which point it's back to depressing square one of TTC.

HazleNutt Sat 29-Dec-12 22:43:23

Quod nice to see you back but indeed, happy fucking new year, so sorry about this.

When I had my mc, it was a small consolation that at least I knew I could get pregnant. And happened right away - they say you're more fertile after it as well. Hope all goes as well as it can, considering the circumstances, on Monday.

MotherOfCleo Sun 30-Dec-12 10:29:26

so, tested again this morning and still BFN sad

Griffomais Sun 30-Dec-12 10:33:33

Sorry to hear that [Cleo] when is AF due?

MotherOfCleo Sun 30-Dec-12 10:55:40

NY day, so still a glimmer of hope.....

viviennewestwould Sun 30-Dec-12 12:38:37

Quod, my thoughts are with you and I hope Monday helps you to move forward x

Welcome Boodle and Griff thanks Boodle, over on the Clomid thread there is a lady who has been battling to get her TSH down to 2.5 and as soon as she did she fell pregnant. What were your husband's motility and morphology scores? If you didn't get them, try to get into the practice of demanding evidence of tests scores etc.

Zombie, I promise to try to stay away from that thread blush

Rache, I am more than a little envy at your holidaying in NY. I am going to Accrington on the bus to watch Skyfall grin

Well, it's 7DPO for me and I have given my thermometer to DP to hide so I can't scrutinise my chart pointlessly for the next week looking for signs that aren't there. I no longer feel hope during the 2ww - only a sense of resignation that yet another BFN is on the horizon. Thank goodness a defeatist attitude doesn't stop sperm from fertilising eggs!

Rache1S Sun 30-Dec-12 13:03:10

Captain I am absolutely terrified at the prospect of labour and birth, but after what you wrote I am going to do more reading up on natural birth and its benefits to try and get my head around it (and then knowing my luck a c section will be medically necessary!)

Viv I have been to NY before but DH hadn't and wanted to visit before we are restricted to child-friendly holidays at Centre Parcs and Butlins. TBH it is really taking it out of me - it's absolutely freezing and all the walking around and sight seeing is making me so tired. And TMI ALERT the time difference has screwed up my body clock meaning I haven't 'been' for 3 days blush which is quite uncomfortable. In hindsight I think maybe a beach holiday would have been better in pregnancy. Oh well.

janey1234 Sun 30-Dec-12 13:33:09

Rache and captain - yes I know all those stats. In my close family I have two GP's and two paediatric consultants and have been discussing option over Christmas lunch!

To me I'm just quite a logical / mathematical person, and all the benefits of a natural birth have to be balanced our with the risks to my mind. Risks increase significantly once you're past 35 (eg you're 3 or 4 times more likely to need an emcs, and assisted births (forceps etc) are much more frequent). Some of the risks are quite scary, and my midwife agreed and said to weight them up and choose. Argh don't know what to do. If I could be guaranteed a straightforward natural birth I would of course choose that... But who knows. Have a while to think about it though!

happylass Sun 30-Dec-12 13:33:59

Sorry to hear that mother but like you said there's still hope. I too am due AF on 1st Jan. Away in Edinburgh at the moment so decided am going to POAS tomorrow if she doesn't show before then. That way if its bad news at least I can leave it behind in 2012 and start the New Year afresh and also have a bloody good drink to drown my sorrows on NYE

HazleNutt Sun 30-Dec-12 13:52:05

Rach but all the shopping you can do! Tons of maternity shops there as well. And maternity fitness wear, [rant] the choice on this side of the pond is just ridiculous - even shops that advertise themselves as specialised in maternity sports wear have 2 tops and 1 pair of capris, all hideous and/or unwearable in real life.

As for travelling with kids - my niece has been all over the world from when she was 2 months and my sister has never stayed in any child-friendly resorts, not to mention Centre Parcs. It's doable.

Rache1S Sun 30-Dec-12 14:14:26

Hazel I think one of the reasons I am so knackered is the shopping! DH didn't get me a Christmas present so I could get myself something from him while we're here grin. And yes they do have good maternity shops. I have bought 2 pairs of trousers which I unfortunately now need while I am here due to constipation.

As for the holidays, I am a bit if a holiday junkie myself so I can't see my desire to go to good places coming to an end after baby, but I suppose we will just see how it goes. I have to admit I was looking at families with pushchairs in Times Square yesterday, fighting through the crowds in the freezing cold and thinking they must be mad!

Boodle9 Sun 30-Dec-12 14:45:12

Hi Viv, thanks for the tip off about the clomid thread. I shall go and have a look. My husband did get his test results printed (I told him to make sure he got them...such a shame I forgot to follow my own advice...) and his motility was 25% progressive, 10% non-progressive and 65% immotile. Morphology was 3%. It would seem both are a little low according to the reference ranges accompanying his results, but have decided not to worry until he gets his second SA done.

I also know how you feel about the 2ww (or 1ww in my case) and no longer feeling hope. I just spend it watching out for the inevitable spotting that kicks in around day 7. The only "good" thing for me is that I'm yet to suffer the agony of a BFN - AF always beats me to it!

HazleNutt Sun 30-Dec-12 15:26:36

Boodle, if you google infertility or conceiving and TSH levels, you find many similar stories - some experts even want to get TSH under 1 for women trying to conceive.

Pipbin Sun 30-Dec-12 15:35:31

I'm not sure what to do this month ladies.
I have my pre op consultation on the 8th which is cd 14 and then my op on cd24. My usual ov date is anywhere from cd13 to 20. Should I just DTD for fun or not at all? Should I carry on with my CBFM or will I get skewed stats from the op?

BelissimaLol Sun 30-Dec-12 22:29:14

What is the op pip? Is it general anaesthetic? If so I think I would wait as I think it can harm the baby. It would be Sod's law you would not know about it. But that's only my non medically trained opinion!

Bunnygirlie Sun 30-Dec-12 23:03:37

Hey ladies, quick question. I have had my letter for a smear test and they recommend going in mid cycle, obviously mid cycle is TTC time so when should I try and book in?

Rache1S Sun 30-Dec-12 23:05:22

Pip is the Op you're having related to TTC? My friend was booked in for some investigation work after TTC unsuccessfully for about 2 years. When she got to the hospital they scanned her during the pre op, told her she was already pregnant and sent her home! I think she was only about 5DPO so way too early to show up on a home test. So if you are having an Op to investigate why you haven't conceived yet it sounds like they rule out pregnancy before doing anything which could be harmful to an embryo so I personally would continue TTC as normal.

Rache1S Sun 30-Dec-12 23:09:02

Bunny I would book in for just after your fertile window so you can avoid DTD and its unpleasant after effects for a day or so before flashing your bits at someone. That should still be classed as mid cycle.

Pipbin Sun 30-Dec-12 23:09:34

It's a lap and dye so they will be poking about up my bits and bobs.
I think I'll carry on as usual unless advised otherwise. There is nothing in the paperwork I've got to say don't get updiffed.

Rache1S Sun 30-Dec-12 23:15:15

I'm sure they will check before poking about up your bits and bobs grin And if you were to be upduffed already then what a way to find out!

BelissimaLol Sun 30-Dec-12 23:22:13

Yeah I actually agree! Go for it girl grin

happylass Mon 31-Dec-12 08:46:09

So AF turned up this morning. Right after I'd just POAS. Double kick in the teeth sad

New Year's resolution = get a BFP!!

HazleNutt Mon 31-Dec-12 09:09:38

Oh so sorry happy. At least you can send the old evil 2012 away in style, with loads of champagne!

janey1234 Mon 31-Dec-12 09:44:04

Oh I'm sorry happy. sad

viviennewestwould Mon 31-Dec-12 10:36:06

Happy, I'm sorry about AF. That's not uncommon in my house sad

viviennewestwould Mon 31-Dec-12 10:37:26

(I meant AF arriving immediately after POAS).

BottleRed76 Mon 31-Dec-12 10:51:10

Happy I've had that before. Really peed off I'd wasted a stick as well as AF turning up. Then that evening met with friends who announced they were preg! Punch in the tits!

Just been catching up on the thread.

In reference to the FB conversation, I will probably go public after 12 week scan. It's been quite hard not to post anything about having to stay sober. and I had to delete a congrats message on my wall from my cousin
I've been the one who's read other peoples new baby updates and felt really fucked off it wasn't me but I would never expect them to keep their news off FB so not to upset me. However, the mummy-bores and the 'Ive had a baby so I know absolutely everything now and I should write a book' types, get right on my tits!

Providing all goes well this time and I end up with a healthy baby, I really hope I don't loose all my sensitivity to how I felt ttc and the MCs.

I used to work with a lady who bored the shit out of me about her son. Seriously, every bloody detail of what he said and did. Even the contents of his nappies! This was before I was even trying.... Anyway, she told me once that she'd had him quite late and didn't think she could have kids so I guess that explained it a bit.
And then there was another colleague, who knowing about my MCs was still unable to speak to me for more than a few seconds without mentioning her pregnancy. My first day back after the first MC she came over to my desk to welcome me back with her massive pregnant belly in my face and moved straight onto the subject of her baby..... FFS! Not sure if she was being thick or a bitch.

Anyway, rant over.
Still worrying its all going to go wrong, but I guess I'll just have to get used to that feeling
Scan Friday. Eeeeeeek

Aquarius1 Mon 31-Dec-12 11:38:58

Commiserations happy

Hope all goes well on Friday bottle

Have coped with two birth announcements and two pregnant bellies in my face this Xmas and don't feel too bad about it- think the wine / gin and cheese diet helped. Here's to 2013 bringing us good times and answering our bfp prayers.

Bunnygirlie Mon 31-Dec-12 11:39:12

Rant away bottle sometimes you just have to!

I'd like to rant about reading today about 21 year old who gave birth Xmas day without knowing she was PG! And Kanye and fecking Kim I'm famous for no reason being pg FFS!!!

Aquarius1 Mon 31-Dec-12 11:39:34

Oops forgot wine

Bunnygirlie Mon 31-Dec-12 11:54:02

Oh and my friend who is due with her fourth had her scan today to find out the sex, so guess what we'll be talking about this new years eve sad

HazleNutt Mon 31-Dec-12 11:55:41

So not only do I have to worry about giving the kid the same name as the Royals, I also need to worry about the Kardashian. Can only hope she'll be a proper celebrity and name the kid something "original"..

Pipbin Mon 31-Dec-12 12:14:41

Hazle I imagine the Royal name will be something historical. This child will be 3rd in line to the throne and need a Kingly or Queenly name. But Kardashian FFS, I wouldn't worry about them it'll be something dreadful.

viviennewestwould Mon 31-Dec-12 12:22:03

Shit. Are you for real about Kanye & Kim?? Please let it not be so. J-Z & Beyonce were bad enough. And don't get me started on Peaches Geldof...Mind you, I can't wait to see the gargantuan state of Kim's already-vast ass. Hurrah!!

Bottle, your post made me laugh out loud - I know just the kind of women!

Bunny, I will never understand these women who go for a shit and a baby falls out. Freaks. I'd like to rant about the fact that I have had to place DP's very important Coenzyme Q10 tablets next to the remote controls as he keeps forgetting to take them. He has nothing else to do with his days whilst on leave than take the bastard tablets and he forgets nearly every day. He never ever forgets to log onto his Fantasy Football League every morning hmm

Pipbin Mon 31-Dec-12 16:58:37

I know a woman who didn't know that she was pg until she went into labour.
What gets to me is that it wasn't her first baby! You can kind of understand it when its a 15 year old girl who is really in denial about what might be happening, but this woman I know was in her 30s and had had a baby before!
She was feeling ill and her husband called her sister who lived over the road.
Her sister said, 'if I didn't know better then I'd say you were having a baby'. They got her to a hospital and looked up her skirt and low and behold, she was!

ImpatientOne Mon 31-Dec-12 17:10:55

Hi ladies. I haven't been around these boards for a long time now - TTC 18 months now - but today I just needed it as got a big scan pic on my FB news feed from a school friend now expecting her 2nd baby and it really threw me sad

I'm usually ok but it's probably compounded by having to book in for my Hycosy this morning (start of AF) and the end of 2012 which was the year we had hoped to start our family...

Anyway enough moping about, was good to see the conversation above about FB announcements etc - makes me feel less mean!

Quodlibet Mon 31-Dec-12 17:15:23

Hi all

Just checking in to say ERPC went fine today and I am home recovering. Everyone was wonderfully kind, and it wasn't scary or traumatic at all. It feels like a huge relief to be seeing out the year finally past the last week's horrid limbo.

I haven't caught up with everyone's news but hope you are all fine.

BelissimaLol Mon 31-Dec-12 19:36:06

Glad you have a clean slate to start the year quod

Wishing you all a lovely 2013 grin

MotherOfCleo Mon 31-Dec-12 20:26:18

just got a faint faint faint line on an internet cheapy, also when I checked it against ydays that had a v faint line too....only noticeable when compared to this one. Gives me slight hope. Just hope its not just me hoping. There are def 2 lines......gonna leave it till tues or wed an test again if AF stays away. Got I hope this is a good sign! xxx

MotherOfCleo Mon 31-Dec-12 20:29:27

meant wed or thur! thought today was sunday....doh!

viviennewestwould Mon 31-Dec-12 20:44:09

Quod, I am so pleased you've got that closure. I don't mean that insensitively, you understand. Sending you and your OH peace and very best wishes x

viviennewestwould Mon 31-Dec-12 20:46:00

Mother!! How unbelievably brilliant! On New Year's Eve of all days! thanks

Blessings and peace to all of you for 2013 xxx

Quodlibet Mon 31-Dec-12 21:00:38

Congrats Mother! Amazing news!

MotherOfCleo Mon 31-Dec-12 21:04:47

i hope its not my tipsy eyes playimg tricks. eeek

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Mon 31-Dec-12 21:29:26

quod big hugs. Glad it went alright. I hope you get to use tomorrow's holiday to rest.
mother congratulations!

Rache1S Mon 31-Dec-12 21:43:55

I'm glad it went well Quod and you can hopefully head into next year with a clean slate, safe in the knowledge that yours and your DP's bits work fine smile

Great news Mother!

janey1234 Mon 31-Dec-12 22:44:42

Oh quod bless you for letting us all know. My experience like yours last year made me realise how bloody wonderful the nhs can be; glad they made something so horrendous as bearable as possible. Here's to 2013 being a fresh start for you.

Mother - a line is a line! Congratulations!

Bunnygirlie Tue 01-Jan-13 01:44:59

Nice to see you quod here's hoping 2013 is lucky for us all!!!

Had to stop myself from slapping my friend tonight, having a little weep coz she found out she's having another boy (after 2 girls and a boy) aaaaaagh

Happy New Year Ladies!!!

MotherOfCleo Tue 01-Jan-13 09:56:04

I hope this is your year quod!!!

Im sorry to symptom spot when youve had such a tough time but you guys are my outlet, OH wouldnt care about where my cervix is lol. grin

The witch is due today, so far no sign, no cramps at all, my cervix is actually much higher than the last 2 days, I can hardly reach it. Plus the brown spotting stopped yesterday and now I have lots of creamy cm (sorry way tmi).

Im hoping I implanted later than I originally thought (perhaps 9 or 10dpo rather than 7dpo) Will retest wednesday and hope hope hope for a good BFP.

HazleNutt Tue 01-Jan-13 10:24:31

Mother, a line is a line! Congratulations!

Nice to see you back here Quod.

And Happy New Year to everybody!

Pipbin Tue 01-Jan-13 10:25:27

Happy new year ladies.

Sounds hopeful Mother. Also interesting that you had some spotting. I get spotting every month and tend to start despairing.

We went to a friends for NYE and them and the other friends that were there are all planning to never have children and it got me thinking that if we don't have children it won't be the end of the world.

MotherOfCleo Tue 01-Jan-13 10:36:38

Hi pip I dont usually have spotting so its a bit unusual...hoping good unusual not bad unusual.

viviennewestwould Tue 01-Jan-13 11:40:39

Pip, right now I can't think of anything more brilliant than having friends who don't ever want children.

I'm at 9DPO and my nipples are so sore they feel as though they've been savaged by a rottweiler. They've been like this during the 2ww ever since I started Clomid. I assume there's a direct correlation between high levels of progesterone in the luteal phase and sore nips. Really annoying.

Happy new year everyone! Hope 2013 brings you everything you want

Rache1S Tue 01-Jan-13 12:26:04

Pip of course you'll have children if you want them! It may be a bit of a rollercoaster getting there but there is far too much assistance available these days for anyone who wants a baby to remain childless. Keep the faith, you sound like you will be such a lovely mum. smile

Neshie Tue 01-Jan-13 13:31:26

Happy new year everyone smile

Pip I also spent NYE with two couples who don't/won't have children so I know where you're coming from

I spent New Year's Eve with a load of other people who weren't drinking. Weird! On the plus side, no hangover!

Aquarius1 Tue 01-Jan-13 13:55:13

Greetings and happy new year one and all smile

Envy you pip and neshie I spent NYE with pg people & talking about pg friends - whilst am happy for them couldn't help feeling sad and frustrated that I couldn't talk about how I was feeling. I keep telling myself 9 months isn't all that long in the scale of things & I just need to be patient....

Boodle9 Tue 01-Jan-13 14:19:48

Happy New Year to everyone! I feel for all of you who had to spend the evening with pregnant people - that would have really dragged me down. Fortunately for us, we don't have any pregnant friends at the moment (just loads who have got new borns) so last night was all about loud music, good cheese and champagne!
MotherofCleo - fingers crossed for you!

happylass Tue 01-Jan-13 15:31:09

Happy New Year everyone. Lets hope it brings lots of BFPs for camp TTC and healthy little ones for those already upduffed grin.

Fx for you Mother sounds very promising!

viviennewestwould Tue 01-Jan-13 15:50:06

Rache, unfortunately 'assistance' does not come cheap and I, for one, feel terribly sad that, without pots of cash (which I don't have), I may not realise my dream of having a baby sad

Rache1S Tue 01-Jan-13 16:14:55

Viv I don't knows too much about it but is it a case of a post code lottery as to how much state assistance is available? One of my work colleague's girlfriend has just had a baby by IVF which has been free on the NHS despite them earning nearly 100k between them, whereas I have heard people from other areas saying they can't get it at all, sometimes because the man already has a child from a previous relationship, which seems very cruel.

Pipbin Tue 01-Jan-13 17:37:04

As far as I know Rache the cut off for IVF is 40. Which is why, if my lap and dye shows that there is no chance of it happening through nature with us then it's straight off to the IVF clinic without stopping.
It's open to anyone regardless of earnings but you need to be under 40 and have a BMI under 30.

viviennewestwould Tue 01-Jan-13 17:38:17

Rache, it frigging infuriates me!! I can't get NHS IVF because I'm over 39 and my DP has a child already with his ex. I do not feel I am entitled to a child, however, I do feel I should not be discriminated against for being 41 when wealthy twenty-somethings are getting NHS help sad angry

twinklestar2 Tue 01-Jan-13 18:22:00

Happy new year everyone.

Nice to see you quod.

Mother - keep us posted, it sounds promising.

Bunnygirlie Tue 01-Jan-13 22:26:46

So onto another year and another month of trying, AF has left the building so now it's FX for DTD with no lurghy, stress or performance anxiety! Think we may go away for the weekend to try and help!

FX for all those trying to get their BFP!

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 07:47:45

the witch landed sad
i am so so sad, gutted, depressed. I was so sure.
I dont see how we can dtd the 4 days prior to ov and twice on ov day and still miss my egg......this is so depressing.
How do people get preggo by accident.....geez!!! sad

Bunnygirlie Wed 02-Jan-13 08:18:28

Oh mother that's pants!

I know what you mean though, my friend when she got pregnant said oh we only did it once that month, geez!!!

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 09:07:55

mother but you DID get a line, so you probably managed to get the egg, it just didn't implant properly, was a so-called chemical pregnancy. Very common and nothing to worry about - actually can be seen as a good thing, there is an egg and the boys can swim, just have to keep Fx that the next one sticks better.

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 09:52:32

mother I think hazle is right. A line is a line no matter how feint. I think you were pregnant but you had a chemical pregnancy, which is horrible but massively common. So everything 'works' for you and your DP/DH (sorry, can't remember which) and hopefully next time it will implant and stick. And I think I remember correctly that hazle had a chemical pregnancy too, and then got pregnant within a month or two after that. Hopefully the same will happen to you very soon....

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 10:04:17

Yes that's what happened, I got a line but AF a week or so later, and pregnant again immediately after that (and so far, fx, it seems to be a sticky one) smile . As with a regular mc, some sources claim you're more fertile after a chemical as well, so get busy dtd this month!

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 10:16:30

Thanks Janey and Hazel really nice to hear a positive slant on things. It was such a faint line though, I'm still not sure if I half imagined it.... no pull yourself together woman, you saw a tiny faint line you know you did I just really wanted it this month. Being totally selfish it's my 30th in March and I wanted to be able to announce it then, it would have been THE BEST birthday present ever! Ahh well back to the drawing board bed, sack, BDing, at least the OH will be pleased

happylass Wed 02-Jan-13 11:07:09

So sorry to hear that mother must be awful to have that glimmer of a BFP and then have it snatched away. As the others said at least you know everything is in working order. I turn 35 next month (when the hell did I get so old?!? confused) and was hoping to get a BFP before then. Think I can just about squeeze in 2 more attempts. <holds mother's hand for next cycle>

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 11:18:46

Mother - my line was so faint to begin with that you practically had to examine it under a microscope and I had to keep checking it obsessively under bright lights every ten minutes for about three days. Luckily for me it 'stuck' and the line gradually got darker over a week or two (until I ran out of sticks to pee on). But as all of those who ttc for more than one month know, if there isn't a line there's NOTHING THERE, absolutely sodding NOTHING, so you will have definitely seen a line. Honestly. Sorry it didn't work out this time sad. It's rotten for you both.

Right, mother and happy - I have everything crossed that you both get birthday BFP's, if not sooner. Yes you might not want to announce it on your birthday to everyone, but it would be just as lovely to have had your BFP by then...

Quodlibet Wed 02-Jan-13 11:22:34

Mother sorry to hear that, how disappointing. Echoing what others have said, it sounds like an implantation that didn't stick if you registered some HCG. Nature can be very cruel to us. (As can NHS IVF guidelines Viv - how shitty.)

Pip, going back a bit about whether its worth you ttcing this month with a lap and dye, I have been wondering, don't they flush your tubes with dye during the procedure? I may be being dim but I keep worrying about a poor potentially-fertilised egg getting flushed out. Might it do you good to have a month off from the pressure this month. Sorry to bring a less positive slant to it all.

I am doing OK here, only v light bleeding and occasional mild cramps. I am bracing myself for some hormonal fallout. Tested yesterday and got a positive on a HCG which made me a bit wobbly - those two lines won't ever have the same purely joyful meaning for me again I don't think. I reckon when my body finally works out it isn't pregnant anymore it might (rightfully) be a bit cross. Not sure yet whether we will get back in the saddle this month or wait til after AF as doctors advise. Might be academic anyway as I am away for a week next week without DP so might well miss OV.

Pipbin Wed 02-Jan-13 11:24:47

I want to have the same operation that Lady Mary on Downton had, where the doctor said to her, 'you'll be pregnant in three months', and she was.

viviennewestwould Wed 02-Jan-13 11:49:12

Really sorry, *Mother, how disappointing.

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 12:39:43

thanks everyone, you guys rock! I feel like im on a bit of a roller-coaster, up, down, up down. Thanks Happy <hopes that happy and mother will be skipping into their birthdays - honest we are both only turning 21 - with a bun nestling happily in their ovens and a smug look on their faces>

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 12:58:01

DH is teasing me because I've turned into such a worrier, very unlike me.

Had the blood tests on Friday and they always send the results the next day. Saturday - nothing. Monday - nothing. Well of course by that time I was convinced that they've discovered something, that I must have a toxo infection, googling the sypmtoms (in most cases, there are none) and so on.
Got the results today, everything fine.

Doc said to relax. How??

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 13:00:32

now I'm confused, what I thought was the start of AF this morning certainly looked like it is now just pale pink CM, not even reached the liner yet. WTF is going on? I have a BFN on my test did one this morning before I realised the witch was in town I do have some cramps so maybe it will turn into more but it usual starts with a vengeance if you know what I mean
Ahhh why is my body such a drama queen?!?

Rache1S Wed 02-Jan-13 16:33:29

Viv I completely agree that access to IVF should be based on individual circumstances and health rather than a flat cut off. Doesn't the NHS know that 40 is the new 30?! I keep telling myself as I hurtle towards it. I also have a DSD which means that I probably wouldn't get help if I needed it, which I also think is ridiculous. As much as I love my DSD, having her around for a few days a week could not possibly satisfy my own fundamental desire to have my own baby with DH and I imagine most other childless step-mums feel the same.

Oooo Mother, I was just about to say commiserations on AF but it sounds like the fat bitch might not be singing after all. Fingers crossed!

Well we arrived home this morning to a letter telling us our Down's risk is 1 in 100,000, which is reassuring and only leaves a thousand other possible problems to worry about.

Aquarius1 Wed 02-Jan-13 17:22:54

mother sounds intriguing - hope its a good sign!!

pip I saw that episode - me too- maybe you could ask while you're having your l&d wink

viviennewestwould Wed 02-Jan-13 19:04:51

Rache, I wish I could say I was tender-hearted towards my DP's son but he's a weird little fucker who still shits his pants at seven and steals from my coin collection (I've only saved about 86p but, still..)

Anyone joining me for One Born Every Minute tonight? [sigh]

viviennewestwould Wed 02-Jan-13 19:05:45

Oh, went to see The Impossible today at the cinema. Take my advice and wait for the DVD.

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 19:14:12

Yes viv, I shall be watching and totally shitting myself too. Has always made me sob - suspect I will be even worse now with all the hormones, argh.

Have decided that jan and feb are ridiculously gloomy months, and that the only way us elderberries can possibly get through it is with lots of BFP's. here's hoping!

Boodle9 Wed 02-Jan-13 19:24:13

Good to hear that your blood test results were OK, Hazle.

Quod, I'm pretty new here, but so sorry to read about your, quite frankly, shitty end to 2012; I hope that "hormonal fallout" doesn't happen and that you recover quickly and get back on track with things.

OBEM's back? Best ask DH to hide the remote; I'm not up for a sobfest!

Quodlibet Wed 02-Jan-13 19:52:31

Thanks Boodle

Great news on blood tests Rach and Hazle.

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 20:00:41

Rache that's amazing - I was overwhelmed with my odds of 1 in 3692 but that's impressive!

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 20:09:24

viv that is weird! Dont envy you their!

God I have epic cramps but AF still isnt showing her face, grrrr come on witchy I know you're their lurking, stop playing with me lets get this over with! sad

twinklestar2 Wed 02-Jan-13 20:28:30

sad mother. Don't know what's going on sad

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 22:13:26

me neither twinkle all gone again now...had 2 bloody wipes and nowt else.....grr wish my body would sort itself out!!!! Had cramps all evening but theyve come to nothing so far.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Wed 02-Jan-13 22:27:09

mother this is sounding pretty hopeful so fx.

Bunnygirlie Wed 02-Jan-13 22:27:10

Not sure if I'm going to watch One Born, might be upsetting now I'm TTC. I know I would def not watch it if I was PG as it would freak me out.

Anybody else joining me in DTD week next week? Do I have a cycle buddy?

Rache1S Wed 02-Jan-13 22:50:49

Bunny I always watched the last series with a large glass of wine. I found it was much more bearable enjoyable that way as we weren't TTC at that point but I knew we were going to start soon. grin

Janey the surprisingly good odds are just another example of my pregnancy giving with one hand and then taking away with the other..... I opened the envelope to the good news and then 10 minutes later couldn't find the heartbeat with the doppler confused I can hear the placenta really loud though so I'm not panicking yet and hope it's just because baby is pointing his arse at me today. It seems that finding that galloping horse is a bit of a precise science.

Viv your DSS sounds like an absolute, ahem, pleasure. grin

viviennewestwould Wed 02-Jan-13 23:04:18

Hmmm...One Born was difficult to watch tonight when I realised that last year I watched almost the entire series pregnant sad

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 23:20:45

rache try not to panic. viv that sucks, feel for u

twinklestar2 Wed 02-Jan-13 23:28:20

I avoided OBEM as we had to dtd tonight and I didn't want to be sad for it!

On cd10 and first dtd of the month done.

Boodle9 Thu 03-Jan-13 00:08:54

I'm on CD 10 too (well, technically 11 now its after midnight). Avoided OBEM too but not for the same reason as you, twinkle grin

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 00:37:34

arghhh still no AF.....cramps but nothing else, this morning was more than spotting though....confused. Hope my body makes up its mind overnight and figures out what the heck is happening by morning...getting frustrated now! sad

Pipbin Thu 03-Jan-13 00:46:03

I know what you mean Mother. After that kind of spotting and a BFN , you just want AF to turn up and get it over and done with.

CD 8 here and we've already DTD twice, for fun!

Bunnygirlie Thu 03-Jan-13 08:39:33

CD7 here, think we need to DTD this weekend to take some pressure off next week/weekend!

If apps are right then AF due end jan, few days after my birthday, I wonder what kind of prezzie I will be getting confused

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 09:23:02

Cramps but still nothing, just pinky brown spotting....grrr I'm getting so frustrated now. I'm going to test on Saturday if I have nothing more by then.

HazleNutt Thu 03-Jan-13 11:29:44

Rach even my doc had a bit of trouble findning the heart beat last time, so probably nothing to worry about (and a reason I really should not get a doppler myself, would be panicking every time).

mother any change?

janey1234 Thu 03-Jan-13 12:04:28

Yes rache - agree the baby will just be in a funny position, am sure all is fine. But like hazle, I cannot allow myself to get one due to the inevitable panicking!

mother - how bloody annoying for you. It's so frustrating when it's like this, just com, AF, you old boot, or don't! Must be like torture waiting sad

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 12:28:34

Thanks hazel and janey the evil old witch has finally arrived, never been so glad to see her horrid face, I was so sick of being in limbo!

Now, and talk about thinking ahead, should OV again on the 17th or 18th according to my apps didn't trust the MyDays one so got Woman Log too, they are about a day different I'm a freak I know. That gives me 10 days before I have to start peeing on OPK sticks. I've never seen so much of my own pee in my life as I have the last few months of TTC. Nice huh.

janey1234 Thu 03-Jan-13 12:33:30

I'm sorry mother. But you did have a line, remember that...

I don't know about chemical pregnancies, but after my miscarriage my cycle went slightly haywire, so you might not ovulate exactly when you expect - thank goodness for OPK!! Hopefully you'll have some kind of a fertility boost like hazle and get upduffed straight away....

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 12:52:39

Mother, I would recommend charting your temperatures. Have you looked at fertility friend? You will know when AF is on its way from the behaviour of your temps in the final days of your luteal phase. Mine starts to drop ever so slightly from 11DPO and then plummets the day before AF. I rarely test before AF is due simply because my temps tell the full story.

I have just received my day 21 progesterone result over the phone: 119.4!! How marvellous is that? Plus, my temperature today, at 11DPO, has gone up! [must not get excited or hopeful]

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 13:00:35

I've not looked into temping viv, how does it work? FX this is your month!!!

Rache1S Thu 03-Jan-13 13:55:12

Sorry about AF Mother, how frustrating but at least you aren't in limbo any more and can plan your next bout of intensive shagging grin

I don't know anything about progesterone readings Viv but your temperature rise sounds hopeful. FX smile

I definitely wouldn't have bought a doppler Hazle and Janey for the same reasons you describe, but having been given one I just can't resist using it! I was obviously just really lucky when I heard the heartbeat on my first attempt and will try not to get disheartened by not being able to find it now. I definitely have a very fast and loud placenta though! I will try again later and if I still can't find it I will ask DH to go hide the doppler in the garage for a few weeks for the sake of my sanity.

Have any of you second trimester ladies got your energy back yet as promised in all the books? I am still absolutely whacked most of the time and no sign of it letting up yet, although I don't think the holiday we just went on particularly helped. DH's Nike Fuelband says we walked the equivalent of a heavy gym workout every day while we were away shock I want to join a couple of local antenatal exercise classes but I'm so tired I just don't know if I can motivate myself to get off the sofa and go to them.

HazleNutt Thu 03-Jan-13 14:08:54

Except for a few days a couple of months ago, I haven't actually had any problems with energy levels. When did you get back, probably still jet-lagged?

But exercise really helps, I feel a lot better when I drag my backside to the gym or out for a jog. Hopefully I can keep doing my normal classes at least for a few more months.

DH is smugly telling everybody that oh those pregnancy books are full of it, talking about tiredness, aches and pains, horrible nausea and being emotional - as I haven't really had any of this, I feel totally fine. I am trying to explain him that I've just been lucky and many women indeed have all that and more, not sure he believes me though.

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 14:11:35

hazel janey and rache please please please can I join your club this month??? smile

rache fret not, I am already planning the intense bout of shagging to come. grin

Did any of you try temping? opks? Just wondering if you had any insider info? smile

janey1234 Thu 03-Jan-13 14:40:05

mother - please do join our club, we're recruiting new members smile

rache - I haven't actually suffered that badly with tiredness compared to stories from my friends, but this last week or two have been ridiculous. How come my tiredness seems to be starting in the second trimester rather than the first?! I too wondered if it was to do with jet lag but I've been back since 24th so should really be fine by now, and I was absolutely fine when we flew out there...

janey1234 Thu 03-Jan-13 14:40:24

Oh, and no, didn't do temps. OPK's were my friend though.

Rache1S Thu 03-Jan-13 14:59:37

Mother You most definitely can join our club, it's certainly not exclusive! grin I struck gold on my first month of using OPK and temping so I would definitely recommend given them a go. I used a Clearblue Ov Test and just got a cheap BBT thermometer from Amazon.
I would recommend joining Fertility Friend to chart your temperatures. It's free and there's loads of temping advice on there.

We got back yesterday morning Hazle. I slept for most of the day yesterday and then for 11 hours last night! <glances over at unpacked suitcase and mountain of washing> Thank goodness I am not back at work until Monday.
My pregnancy is quite badly timed on the exercise front. I used to go to the gym regularly but my gym relocated too far away so I ended my membership. I was thinking about joining another one but was quite lazy for a few months when I fell pregnant so I didn't end up joining one. I have been half heartedly exercising at home but I do feel I want to do more now. The two antenatal classes I have seen won't take women under 13 weeks so with Christmas getting in the way now is my first opportunity to go. I think you have to pay for them up front so I think I will just book them and then force myself to go!

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 15:17:57

Ahh thanks rache maybe I'll look into tempting too then?

I don't have a gym membership but I do a Bokwa class once a week at a gym I never would have known was their as it's tiny, but it has a studio and you can just pay for classes. I also used to do zumba and combat but dropped those as we got a puppy and I spend more time walking her now.

Hope you feel better soon

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 16:14:51

Mother, yes, use the fertility friend website and go to Amazon to buy a basal body temperature thermometer (a few quid). Basal body temperatures are a reflection of progesterone levels and, as such, can tell you if/when you ovulate. There is a distinct shift in temperature the day after ovulation which remains elevated throughout the luteal phase until progesterone plummets (if there is no pregnancy), temperatures come down and AF arrives. Unfortunately, charting cannot tell you in advance when you are going to ovulate, however, taking a retrospective look at previous charts can give you an excellent picture of when your fertile window is likely to appear the following month. OPKs are a godsend IMO (unless you suffer from PCOS in which case they are unhelpful). You simply POAS from around CD10, start bed-rocking every other day untill you get a positive OPK and then have sex for the next three nights consecutively.

Google the Sperm Meets Egg Plan. Foolproof except you have to really, really fancy your husband wink

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 16:20:50

Has everyone read read Zita West's Guide To Getting Pregnant? You may think I'm trying to get you to suck eggs but, seriously, it's a revelation and hugely readable. ZitaWest is a fertility expert and clinician and claims that the majority of women who come to her with fertility issues are simply not having enough sex and not at the right time. There's lots of information about weight (hugely significant when ttc although we'd like to ignore that), supplements, male fertility, hormones, the lot. I couldn't put it down. Get it from Amazon for under a tenner.

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 16:37:39

Just read sperm meets egg thanks viv I shall be taking up that advice this month smile

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 16:49:52

Mother, bear in mind that lots of articles would tell you that, by the time some women get their positive OPK, it is too late to get plenty of semen positioned at the fallopian tubes just prior to ovulation, by which they mean that it's better to have tons of sperm in situ ready for the egg to be released as opposed to waiting for your LH surge. I really think that's the mistake I've been making for many months. Unfortunately, with DP's ejaculatory issues, it just is not feasible for us to shag like rabbits throughout my cycle. We do, however, follow the Sperm Meets Egg Plan as closely as his 'issues' will allow. I reckon sex on the day of ovulation (as early as possible) is the key, with plenty of sperm already in situ.

janey1234 Thu 03-Jan-13 16:52:45

I haven't viv no, but have also heard it's really, really good.

The more I think about it the more I realise that it really is a lot trickier to get knocked up than you believe when you're at school, when you're made to feel that you can get pregnant at the drop of the hat! I remember getting the fear about dry humping as there was this tiny, tiny fear (not logical I know) that just one determined sperm would somehow work his way through clothes to impregnate me!

Pipbin Thu 03-Jan-13 18:01:14

Mother I tempted for about 6 months using the BBT thermometer from Amazon and fertility friend. My charts are here: www.fertilityfriend.com/home/pipbin
I found that it really helped me understand my cycle and what was going on.
However, I stopped because I found that I was never free of TTCing. Taking my temperature every morning meant that TTCing was the first thing I thought about eery morning and the last thing I though about at bedtime.
I have stopped temping and now use a Clear Blue Fertility monitor.
I have found that really helpful as it warns me when I am about to OV as well as when I am OVing, I still use fertility friend to track DTD and CM but not temping really.

Ultimately, in my honest opinion, all of these things are really like hiccup cures, all they do is make you feel like you are actively doing something about it while nature takes it's course.
The best way is to shag every other day really. No amount of temping, special lube, charts or OV sticks are going to help you if you've got bocked tubes like me. But still I do it! Makes me feel better.

Pipbin Thu 03-Jan-13 18:05:14

Oh and Janey. I had a friend who got pregnant without ever having had actual, penetrative sex, so it can happen!

I just wish had hadn't spent all those years preventing it!

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 18:10:00

pip I think you may be right, OH doesnt know im on here an doesnt really know I use OPKs, not that he would mind. I dont want to obsess, i told him just now the only answer was more sex.....he said he was up for the challenge lol grin

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 18:43:36

Sorry she got you mother. sad

Viv - I tried that SMEP plan, tiring isn't it? It's kind of what we do anyway. I use the CBFM and we dtd every other day in the highs and then on both peaks and the high afterwards so that's 3 days in a row.

Well I got a surprise this morning: cd11 and my monitor peaked! Only started dtd yesterday though. Hope that's ok. I kinda figured the dtd near OV are the most important ones hey?

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 18:47:44

Pip - has the CBFM been spot in for you? I have to say it hasn't for me. Been using it for 6 months now and 2 of those 6 months AF has come days and days after my peak giving me like a 19-day luteul phase! Last month i peaked on the monday but then i saw ewcm 6 days later so i dtd. and then af came 14 days after i saw the ewcm not after the peak.

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 18:51:12

I largely agree with what you say, Pip, however the Clearblue monitor gives 'high' readings way before ovulation in some cases - don't you run out of steam by the time you get a 'peak'? I know I would.

Temping is, indeed, horridly obsessive but is a good indicator of when AF is imminent. It's so easy to imagine pregnancy symptoms, I feel, when you're as desperate as we are to get that BFP. The amount of charts of mine which demonstrate 'nausea', 'cramping', 'tender breasts' etc are just embarrassing sad

Pipbin Thu 03-Jan-13 19:25:19

Twinkle I had one month when it got it wrong. However I also used cheap opks at the time too. I used to find that I got a very dark line, but not quite dark enough at around day 14 then actually ov around day 20. The CBFM got it wrong then and said I ov'd at CD 14. I know it was wrong because I was temping at the time too.
I have found that in the last few months my ov has changed to CD14, or there about. I asked the consultant if this was a result of the HSG and he said more likely the weight loss and exercise.

Boodle9 Thu 03-Jan-13 19:32:31

Sorry AF arrived, Mother but as you said, if she is on her way, better arriving now than keeping you in limbo for any longer!

I'm interested to hear people talking about the CBFM and temping. I've been temping for the last 12 months now. I always take my temperature about half an hour before I have to get up and I have (on more than one occasion) fallen back asleep with the thermometer still tucked in under my tongue! blush I can definitely see clear patterns in my data... unfortunately, they're not patterns I want to see! (Low temps and 7-9 day LP) Would love to hear someone else come along and say 'oh yes, perfectly possible to get pregnant with charts like that...' but I know it's not going to happen!

I tried the CBFM for a few months but got fed up with it - it was either exactly the same as the MUCH cheaper OPKs I was using, or it was completely off! Like you, Twinkle, I sometimes would get a peak but then EWCM and a temperature rise 6-7 days later. A little inaccuracy I can handle, but that was just too confusing!

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 22:22:35

Viv - I prob get 2-3 highs before I get my peak. If you dtd eod then that's only 1-2 shags before OV.

Bunnygirlie Thu 03-Jan-13 22:25:49

Evening ladies, Crikey it's getting technical round here. Sorry to hear witch arrived mother

I haven't tried temping and only tried ov sticks in November so can't really comment much.

I have a feeling that our only problem is nit having enough sex at the right time of the month. After 7 years together we are hardly at it like rabbits anymore and every day would be impossible, once a week can be a struggle with job and home stress and DHs bad back and low energy levels etc... sad

My friend who thinks we are just about to start trying said, no pill and lots of sex helps, well lots of sex may be our problem aaaagh

I just wish I could go back to June last year and tell myself what I know now, who knew it was this tricky to get upduffed?!?!?

viviennewestwould Thu 03-Jan-13 22:55:02

Twinkle, if you look at Pip's charts she sometimes gets 'highs' every day from CD8 until ovulation at CD17!! I don't bloody think so... hmm

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 23:45:51

Viv - ah I see, yes that can be a lot of dtd! I think we average around 10 shags a month. Once we did it every other day a month! Nothing works sad

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 23:46:52

PS have managed another dtd tonight so that's cd10 and 11 done. My monitor surprised me by peaking this morning, wasn't expecting it for a few days yet.

MotherOfCleo Thu 03-Jan-13 23:55:24

Snap bunny wish I started researching in sept when we first discussed ttc, if only i knew then what I know now! Id have used opks from day one, ive been off the pill since sept an its only really been the last cycle which has been normal! I had one 35 day cycle followed by a 25 cycle which i thought couldnt possibly be AF as it was 10 days too early, so spent about 2 weeks confused and not dtd as waiting for AF, as such I think I missed 2 OV cycles, I now know that what I thought were AF cramps in that confusing 2 weeks were prob OV cramps.....big fat fail! At least I think my body has calmed down now, never thought 10 years on the pill would have such a lasting effect sad and to think I worried Id get preggo if I missed one pill....haha as if!

Well onwards and upwards! Heres to getting big an fat and preggo in 2013!!! grin

FX anyone else whos body is or was having a bit of a meltdown, pulls itself together thos year and gets on with the job at hand! wink

twinklestar2 Thu 03-Jan-13 23:56:46

Bunny And Mother - I did loads of research before ttc and tried many different things and I'm still not pregnant so don't worry too much about it smile

MotherOfCleo Fri 04-Jan-13 00:00:56

oh and me and my fella have been together 7 years this year and we are well past the at it like rabbits stage. Before TTC I guess we averaged about 5 or 6 times a month, now we can do that in one week, we tried the every other day thing the first month and were knackered by the second week, we now go for quantity when it matters wink if we are too tired in the evening we have a sneaky one first thing. Kind of works for both of us smile I do find it amusing when he starts to flag a bit though, all those years of him asking for it and now I demand too much lol

MotherOfCleo Fri 04-Jan-13 00:01:58

ahh well FX it will happen soon twinkle nice work with catching the peak too smile

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 00:05:21

Mother - we've been together 10 years so we're quite happy when my fertile period is over!!

Bunnygirlie Fri 04-Jan-13 08:24:26

Twinkle, so it's not just me who feels exhausted DTD so much lol

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 09:25:19

We get bored of it!! Sorry if you shouldn't admit things like that but it's true!

Pipbin Fri 04-Jan-13 10:24:41

Blimey Mother, 5 or 6 times a month! Before ttcing we were lucky to do that a year. Honestly, we would sometimes go a month or so without any!
Now we do it a lot more, but we do tend to stop after I've ov'd.
However, now that we have upped the amount we have now started doing it more for fun.
Anyway, that's ten years of marriage for you!

Aquarius1 Fri 04-Jan-13 10:53:04

I'm in the same boat pip et al - married around 7 yrs and definitely didn't dtd as much as til we started trying. Dh loves it sometimes but other times is too tired/ not in mood - bless him after 9 mths of trying he's now getting the fact we need to dtd at certain times. I don't like dtd'ing after I've ov'd or in the wk up to af either.

MotherOfCleo Fri 04-Jan-13 11:15:25

haha pip that is because he actually renamed Sunday 'sexy sunday', if he didn't get it at least once sometimes twice a week he became very grouchy, needs must and all that lol. He used to moan that I didn't initiate now he looks at me like I'm a loon when I do, he should be careful what he wishes for.

It's funny I think he was actually a bit sad we got a BFN this month, he wrote a shopping list for me he is not allowed to shop as the bill doubles sometimes triples when he is in charge of the trolley and it is ALL veg, fruit, chicken, tuna etc, think he took my joke about his sperm being overweight a bit too literally. smile bless him.

janey1234 Fri 04-Jan-13 11:21:51

mother - you really made me laugh about sexy sunday, hilarious smile

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 11:32:50

I, personally, have had my sex life ruined by ttc. It is fucking heartbreaking to see the angst and the pressure my lovely DP is under around ovulation (he can't ejaculate under pressure) and I have forgotten entirely what sexy fun feels like around this time. So much emotional baggage comes to the surface during my fertile window that, after ovulation, we both emerge feeling a little like we've been in a warzone. Anyway, we have resigned ourselves to the notion that this has now become a job - a mission that simply has to be accomplished - so I've introduced porn and other bits of filth into our sex sessions. It has added a new dynamic and is making things a little easier.

Well, it's 12DPO for me and my temp is still high! It should have started falling from yesterday is AF is imminent (I'm due on Sunday).

MotherOfCleo Fri 04-Jan-13 11:34:50

Ohh viv I have everything crossed for you. smile
Janey he's a special one my fella grin

navis176 Fri 04-Jan-13 11:45:33

Sorry for thread silence – I’ve been rather busy the last week or so…
Viv - the Sperm Meets Egg Plan looks interesting – may give that one a go next month.
I really want to squeeze a couple more dtd sessions in the next couple of days – but OH has declared that he is completely knackered – think he’s feeling the pressure too [sigh] – we haven’t been together as long as you guys but he’s quite old bless ‘im…ov today cd16, dtd cd 13, 14, 15, 16…will that be enough??? He’s also put a ban on conceive plus – apparently it is like ‘trying to shag a river’ grin

janey1234 Fri 04-Jan-13 12:06:04

navis - DP started to object to it too, thankfully I was already knocked up before he banned it.

viv - got absolutely everything crossed for you that this is your month. don't understand the temp thing at all but sounds like it could be hopeful?

Pipbin Fri 04-Jan-13 12:22:13

Navis I found that with Conceive Plus i needed a tiny dot of it, really, like a pea sized amount. I don't normally use lube anyway, but when you know you've got to do the job it does help.

Also, I have found that letting my DH know that I don't need to 'arrive' to enjoy it has made a difference. He knows that it's a case of get the job done, not how long it lasts or quality. I think that for him he sees me peeing on things, checking stuff and crying each month, having a quicky is not to much to ask.

captainmoll Fri 04-Jan-13 12:30:54

Hi all. Just got back from a long morning at the Gynae department. Been poked, prodded and fingered a bit more. Such fun. angry
They asked a bunch of questions, told me nothing - I had to ask twice for the results of my progesterone blood test - they said with a shrug of the shoulders that it was bit low. The chief Gynae now wants me back next friday to do the ultrasound again, so more dildo-cam and prodding about, and it means I'll lose a day's wages as I'm on a 0-hours job so no worky, no payey. It may be up to 2 more months on the waiting list after that for surgery, then a month to recover before I can TTC, so I'm looking at 3-4 months all in before I can resume TTC.

Sick of it today.
Humph.
Sorry for the grumpy post, hope you're all good.

janey1234 Fri 04-Jan-13 12:40:46

Oh captain, that's shit, totally shit.
Nobody likes the sodding dildocam.
Plus having to wait to ttc is a complete pain in the arse.
Poor you sad

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 13:06:08

I don't mind the dildocam. There's no pressure to orgasm.

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 13:06:29

winkgrin

Rache1S Fri 04-Jan-13 13:20:11

How frustrating Captain sad With your plumbing sorted and a clean bill of health you'll be upduffed in no time though and this time next year you will probably be nearing your due date. grin

Listening to you lot talk about DTD or rather lack of has made me feel much better. I have been feeling quite guilty about my lack of desire since getting knocked up but we have still been doing it a couple of times a week although it's more through obligation than desire from my point as I would quite frankly rather have a cup of tea and a nap at the moment. I should get DH to read this thread to get the message across that it's not just me! We usually DTD at least 3-4 times a week so he has been protesting, albeit subtly, that he is not getting enough these days. It would seem he doesn't know how good he has got it! grin

I have located the elusive galloping horse this morning so all is good again grin Even by holding the sensor in the same place it still comes and goes as presumably the baby moves around so I think it's normal not to be able to hear it sometimes and I should keep this in mind in future when I'm flapping about the lack of horses in my belly.

Rache1S Fri 04-Jan-13 13:21:07

Lol at Viv grin

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 13:36:20

3-4 TIMES A WEEK?!! Hasn't the man heard of masturbation??

Boodle9 Fri 04-Jan-13 13:56:10

Well, I've just almost snorted my drink out my nose - sexy Sunday, overweight sperm and shagging a river?! grin!

navis, my DH likened it to dipping your bits in a paddling pool...we too have more or less ditched the Conceive Plus now! (And certainly would never use the recommended amount on the tube!)

Another one jumping in the boat - we have been together a long time (double figures) and have been through times of sex drought, though not since starting TTC!

Oh noooo. Not the dildocam again! I'm really starting to dread my appointment! (Not that I was particularly looking forward to it before...)

MotherOfCleo Fri 04-Jan-13 14:15:07

Boodle I just had to swallow a laugh, I'm at work and couldn't very well laugh out loud, though I wanted too. Esp the dipping your bits in a paddling pool! <makes mental note to use incy wincy amount of CP otherwise from the sounds of it OH may just slide straight out again!!!! God we talk about weird stuff huh grin I love it lol.

Yay for the galloping horse rache! so pleased! Also have to agree with viv 3-4 times a week, he must be mad, my OH would thank his lucky stars if he normally got it that much!! I agree maybe a nice dirty as hell magazine and some alone time would do him some good. wink Don't blame you re the cup of tea and a nap, although I don't like tea I'm a damn good napper.

Not sure I want to meet the dildocam, sounds rather unpleasant.

captainmoll Fri 04-Jan-13 15:17:00

Viv you make me laugh. You're right, dildocam has that bonus. Gynae had a good poke around with her fingers earlier, and a freezing bit of metal equipment, and I thought dildocam was def preferable to both of those. She had to be 'chapreoned' by a nurse too, so that was another person meandering about in my lady garden.

I am laughing a lot at all your DTD / Conceive Plus stories. My DH is totally knackered, so the necessary 4-5 goes a month is about all he can take, poor bastard. TMI! He's circumcised, so he really likes the CP. Apparently it's a bit uncomfortable going in 'dry'. shock blush He also hates porn, so lawd knows what he'll do when he has to make love to the plastic cup at the sperm analysis next week! Maybe I'll text him a cheeky picture of my boobs.. grin

janey1234 Fri 04-Jan-13 16:27:20

What I hate most about dildocam is the condom they put on it first. It's just weird that something that you've known exclusively used for sex being used in a non-sexual context. God, when I was young I used to think it was awkward when my bf stopped to put a condom on - it's even worse waiting for a sonographer!

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 16:44:39

THEY PUT A JONNY ON THE DILDOCAM??!! Are you winding me up? I've never seen that!

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 16:49:39

... being used in a non-sexual context. So...I can be absolutely sure the nurse doesn't fancy us, right?

Neshie Fri 04-Jan-13 17:31:19

Just got in from work and catching up on the thread... I am crying with laughter!!! I have a GP appointment on Monday and I have just purchased some conceive plus so I guess I have 'bits dangling in a paddling pool' and potentially 'dildocam' to look forward too!

(DH and I have been together 11years too hmm)

captainmoll Fri 04-Jan-13 18:23:22

Viv they really do put a condom on it. My sonographer last time also squirted the lube on top of it all prettily like it was a Mr Whippy ice cream.

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 18:39:34

Same here captain! Maybe we had the same sonographer?!

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 18:45:22

Pip I Remember doing it for fun... Many moons ago...

Viv I agree that ttc isn't fun or exciting, it's full of despair and anxiety.

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 18:46:05

Lol @ meandering around my lady garden!

Hi everyone, just checking in and having a giggle at all of your antics. When can I cave in and buy bigger clothes? About 14 weeks now and ooof can't breathe in anything in my wardrobe any more. I look like a beached whale.

A beached whale in very very tight jeans with the top button sneakily undone

Rache1S Fri 04-Jan-13 19:33:27

Lol Viv, after being together for just over 4 years, 3 or 4 times a week is usually how much I want it as well so he's not used to me turning it down, and I am not used to wanting to turn it down as it's usually up there with sleeping and eating and drinking wine as one of my favourite things to do. I can barely remember what it's like to feel horny these days. I have told him he is going to have to start with the hand shandys if he hasn't already because I can imagine as I get bigger the shag shop might close its doors altogether for a while.

Rache1S Fri 04-Jan-13 19:35:10

Purple I caved in the last week and bought 2 pairs of maternity trousers, which I have to admit are not exactly sexy but are bloody comfortable! grin

HazleNutt Fri 04-Jan-13 19:44:04

Purple I've been in maternity trousers since about week 14 as well. There are some that look totally decent, like this pair for work www.gap.eu/browse/product.do?cid=73951&vid=1&pid=000761851000
look like normal work trousers, except that I don't have to sit at my desk, buttons open. Got a couple of pairs of jeans as well. Go for it!

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 20:03:14

Rache, I used to enjoy rampant, carefree, spontaneous sex - but it is no longer any of those things as the months roll by and I am getting older. Twinkle, I hear you, sister sad

I'm driving myself nuts wondering what tomorrow's temp will be and whether or not to test (period is due Sunday). DP is out all day tomorrow at the footie and I will be alone (we don't own a car and we live in the wilds) and going fecking mental with it all...[retreats to a corner to rock back and forth]

twinklestar2 Fri 04-Jan-13 20:24:33

I actually had spontaneous sex in cd28 a few months back!

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 20:31:30

We had spontaneous sex at the strike of midnight on New Year's Eve and when DP ejaculated on my tits I just looked down thinking 'what a waste' hmm

Rache1S Fri 04-Jan-13 20:33:12

Viv if you have a test in the house then surely no harm in doing one, but if you have to make a big effort to go and get one on public transport then I would probably be tempted to wait until AF doesn't show. The wait is a killer though, I know.

Bunnygirlie Fri 04-Jan-13 20:52:26

Oh my goodness these last two pages have been hilarious!

Ref DTD frequency, I feel so much better after reading your comments, at least we're not the only couple who don't wanna do it much anymore.

I can feel the pressure and stress building as we head into DTD week (CD8 here). I don't want to put pressure onto DH but I did mention what i'd read about needing healthy sperm so he might have to have a w**k the week before we start DTD so he has fresh/healthy sperm and he gave me a look. I just don't know how to do this without making a big deal of it, unless we are DTD every other day throughout the month then its going to be obvious when I wanna have sex at a certain time of the month and often! If only we were at it like rabbits like in the first few years! This is so difficult!!!

viviennewestwould Fri 04-Jan-13 21:26:15

Rache, I only have sixty-seven tests in the house hmm

Bunny, try hiding the remote controls when you enter your fertile window and then 'find' them when you've ovulated.

Boodle9 Fri 04-Jan-13 22:07:48

Drink snorting again - this time at Viv's New Year's Eve sperm wastage! I too feel a lot better after reading that we're not the only couple who aren't at it like rabbits every day of the week! I work in a school so pre-TTC we could easily go a half term with very little in the way of sexual encounters. (Then make up for it in the holidays!)

Boodle9 Fri 04-Jan-13 22:11:41

Oh, and I meant to add, I have also had a heart-to-heart with DH and basically asked him to make sure that he has a happy ending every other day...with or without my involvement! I want to get some better SA results next time he goes to (in the words of captainmoll 'make love to the plastic cup'! grin

And viv, if you haven't already done one, you might as well test if you've got lots to spare! smile

Pipbin Sat 05-Jan-13 00:16:16

So I was talking to the hairdresser today about moving house and wanting somewhere bigger. The conversation went as follows:
Her: So will you have any children come home?
Me: Sorry I don't follow.
Her: Will any of your children come back and live with you?
Me: I don't have any children; Yet!

Do I really look that old?!

So am I the only girl who wants it more than their other half? Mine can't be bothered with it all most of the time, we mostly do it when it has been a few too many days and I've started being properly sulky about it. I think he was hoping for a rest from it all but turns out being queasy and knackered hasn't stopped me nagging!

You're not old pip people are stupid. I felt insulted when a waitress thought I was my stepsons mum the other day. He's 13 and I'm 30 felt annoyed that she thought I was old enough to have a child that age then i remembered his mum is actually the same age as me!

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 07:15:39

BFN. How can my temps be even higher at 13DPO and it be a BFN? I am royally fucked off. I can not cope with this any more. I am 41 and running out of time..

Now, excuse me while I fuck off and go and repeat the word c**t until I feel a bit better sadsadsad

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 07:16:11

Pipbin, your hairdresser is a c**t.

Rache1S Sat 05-Jan-13 08:58:36

If your temps are still up it might not be over yet Viv, you might just be too early. How frustrating though. Here's hoping smile

MotherOfCleo Sat 05-Jan-13 09:48:37

Ahh shame viv hope its just too early! I do find that a good old bout of swearing my personal favs are f###ing c##t wink helps any situation.

retroelement Sat 05-Jan-13 09:55:13

Hello, can I join? I was over on the just shagging thread for a few months but having just turned 35 and started taking temperatures, I think I need a thread where people understand my hysteria specific age-related concerns about conceiving.

HazleNutt Sat 05-Jan-13 09:57:31

welcome retro and yes, just shagging is for teenagers people younger than us.

Rache1S Sat 05-Jan-13 10:33:11

Hi retro and welcome! If you read back yesterday's posts you'll probably gather that this thread could be called, 'Can't be bothered to shag but need to in order to get upduffed.' grin
I like the while ideal of just shagging but we are far too neurotic old so most of us need to feel we are taking control somewhat by tracking and charting to make us feel like TTC is not a bit of a lottery even though we all know it is.
I also have to admit that a few of us are upduffed already but are hanging around waiting for our cyber buds to get their BFP's.

On a slightly different age-related tangent, is anyone watching the Old Skool weekend on CITV? I have plenty to do but I'm not sure I am going to be able to turn it off! I am so sad

Pipbin Sat 05-Jan-13 10:48:29

On the subject of my stoopid hairdresser's comment (she wasn't my usual lady) it did make me realise that my cousin, who is one year older than me is a grandma. And my SIL who is about 3 years older than me had a 26 year old!

Rache1S Sat 05-Jan-13 11:12:16

Pip I think her ill thought out comment demonstrates why she is a hairdresser and not working in Astrophysics. <puts hard hat on and hopes there aren't any hairdressers on the thread>
If your children were away at Uni you would likely be mid/late 40's or older and even without seeing you I am certain you don't look that old!
My 44 year old boss's long-term girlfriend is 23 and has 4 step-children, the oldest of which is 21. He also had 3 ex wives, the dirty old man.

Oh now that would be weird being a stepmum to someone virtually the same age, it's bad enough inheriting a teenager!
Welcome Retro.

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 12:05:34

Thanks for the tissues, ladies, I really am not coping well today. I went back to bed shortly after the test (we sleep in separate rooms - always have. I won't tolerate snoring) and left DP this note:

'Test negative. Gone back to bed. I can not cope with this any longer and I can't tolerate your fucking selfish smoking, either. Don't wake me up before you go to the football and don't turn the fire off [it's a bastard to light]'
P.s. I absolutely HATE that you are seemingly addicted to energy drinks - more poison probably thwarting our chances of conceiving'.

I just woke up and the house is empty and I am regretting my note already. He is such a marvellous man who is aching as much as I am for this baby. We only ever speak to one another with love and respect and I've been just horrid. Where's the point in laying the blame? I'm pathetic and cruel.

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 12:09:24

[borrows Rache's hard hat and places it on own head] Hairdressers are imbeciles. My hairdresser knows I am a recovering alcoholic and tries to give me a glass of wine ^every fucking time I'm in the chair^: 'Ooooh, go on! It's only one!'

twinklestar2 Sat 05-Jan-13 12:27:22

Welcome retro!

Sorry about bfn but I'm hoping its just too soon. sad at your note. It's just you feeling frustrated. I would def get oh to quit smoking or even cut back, it might help? I know it's hard as we are quitting too but keep telling ourselves its for the greater good.

Cd13 here and according to monitor OV is over. Very weird as that means I should have a really short cycle this month, around 27 days? I never have a 27 day cycle, apart from actually last January <plays spooky music>.

The sad thing is after spending £100 on the CBFM I don't really trust it. I'm going to keep dtd till around cd25ish just in case.

Pipbin Sat 05-Jan-13 12:53:11

Twinkle Stick the CBFM on ebay, it's where I bought mine for about £35.

navis176 Sat 05-Jan-13 13:04:08

viv - lol re dildocam grin. And glad it’s not just me who feels sad at ‘sperm wastage’ [giggle]. But sorry to hear today is tough…
captain - I’m sorry, that must be really frustrating for you – there’s just too much waiting in this ttc game sad
purple - nope, I def want it more than OH – he’s constantly knackered whether we’re ttc or not grin
[waves hello] at retro

twinklestar2 Sat 05-Jan-13 13:29:23

Hmm pip I don't know. It's kinda a good indication of when to start dtd. Although saying that after 18 months of ttc I know what to do, not sure if I need it anymore.

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 13:38:27

Welcome, Retro thanks

Twinkle, I think you should deffo continue bed-rocking and don't trust the CBFM. Would you consider charting your temperatures so you can confirm ovulation, maybe as a back-up to validate the CBFM?

Aquarius1 Sat 05-Jan-13 13:54:32

viv and pip wtf are your hairdressers on? Hope they are at least good at cutting your hair!

viv I've said regretful things to dh before- used to tell him to divorce me (ridiculous) at the height of bad pms -ness- but we made up &sure u will too.

Greetings retro

twinkle I think I'm having a short cycle too - have had sore boobs since 2dpo &now early pre-af symptoms- I blame Xmas (too much sugar -apparently makes pms worse??)

MotherOfCleo Sat 05-Jan-13 15:16:57

ahhh viv sounds like you're going through it pretty bad at the mo, just talk to him and he will be ok, weve all said things we regret in the heat of the moment. Thinking of you

Boodle9 Sat 05-Jan-13 17:37:07

Hi retro!

viv, very sorry it was a negative this morning. Totally understand your frustration about the smoking and the energy drinks though - I've had similar battles with DH in the last year. He has finally realised (after 17 cycles for goodness sake) that perhaps I have a point and if we're going to carry on down the TTC road, it would make sense for us both to be in the best health we possibly can be. I'm no angel of course, but I've been taking action already, so he has some catching up to do!

Bunnygirlie Sat 05-Jan-13 17:53:43

Hi ladies. Having bad day here too viv. Tried to rock the bed this afternoon but DH got the shakes and couldn't perform, stress/pressure is obviously getting to him as he's usually ok prior to TTC (but then we didn't exactly DTD v often), cue him getting annoyed at himself and calling himself f*#king useless and me locking myself in bathroom trying not to cry and making it worse.

Out for dinner tonight with friends which includes the one pg with her fourth, if she cries again coz she's having a boy I may snap and either break down or deck her!!!!!!!!

retroelement Sat 05-Jan-13 17:57:05

Thanks for the welcome! I can definitely relate to some of the upthread discussion.

viv, my misplaced optimism may make things worse but I like to think it's not over until the fat lady sings AF arrives. I'm sure your partner will understand and forgive your note; it's a tough time.

Quodlibet Sat 05-Jan-13 18:30:12

So now I've got a bloody infection and feel like death warmed up. AgghhGHHHGHGGHHH!!! Had to do out of hours/A&E and now on horse strength ABs after a night of violent shivering and fever. Feels like a kick in the face as I was just getting myself back together and now I feel like I've been knocked right back. Don't have any optimism at all about anything at the moment and am really worried about what effect this infection might have on my fertility - I can't seem to find any straight info about it.

Bunny tell your friend from me there are worse things than having a 4th boy and that if she wants to swap for some time on the infected post-miscarriage sofa of self-pity I'm more than happy to oblige.

captainmoll Sat 05-Jan-13 18:48:34

Quod - sorry to hear you're feeling shit. Really hope you feel better soon. The pity-sofa is a rubbish place to find yourself. Hugs.
Viv - sorry to hear about bfn, and totally understand the need to vent. Maybe some good, none ttc, just for fun, make-up sex will help?

Hello Retro!

So, what does anyone know about progesterone levels? Trying to figure what "a bit low" means for my CD21 bloods result. I should have been OVing on CD21, not sure what results or apathy of Gynaecologist mean. CD21 is late to OV, right? They said the Progesterone was 10.8, whatever that means..

captainmoll Sat 05-Jan-13 18:52:09

Oh and Bunny, sorry you're having a shit day too. Our poor knackered men! And poor desperate us! FX it all gets better for everyone very soon.

captainmoll Sat 05-Jan-13 18:52:33

Oh and Bunny, sorry you're having a shit day too. Our poor knackered men! And poor desperate us! FX it all gets better for everyone very soon.

happylass Sat 05-Jan-13 19:19:28

Thinking of everyone that's having a tough time and sending very un-MN hugs.

Quod hope you get better soon, look after yourself!

Welcome Retro

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 20:09:23

Aw, thanks so much for the encouragement, ladies, I feel such a tit for freaking out when there are people on this thread who are properly suffering. Thinking of you, Quod, and the absolute shitness of your situation. Please try not to descend into the madness which would have you believe your fertility has been compromised. It really hasn't. I hope the ABs get to work soon x

Bunny, I have been exactly where you were this afternoon (but not with your husband, might I add). Might a little alcohol help with the nerves? As recovering alckies me & my DP are always bemoaning the fact that we can't just get sloshed and drown the nerves a little. I was serious when I said introducing porn had helped us out this month. DP was dead against it (didn't feel the need to see 'other' women on screen as he loves me and my body so much, blah, blah) but this month, when he had to perform on the morning of ovulation and couldn't ejaculate to save his life I put the laptop on and went to a free porn site I used to star in knew of. It did the trick.

Captain, when my day 21 progesterone (pre-Clomid) was 18.5 I was told I had not ovulated. I have since learned that you can, indeed, ovulate having this score but you are unlikely to be able to sustain a pregnancy.

Michael still hasn't returned from the match and he isn't answering mine or my mother's calls. I am terribly worried. I have to worst feeling he has been drinking.

MotherOfCleo Sat 05-Jan-13 20:17:12

ahhh viv I hope he is home soon free of booze and you guys make up xx

viviennewestwould Sat 05-Jan-13 21:59:29

He is home and he is wasted. My wonderful, selfless, magnificent man is staggering drunk. He is laughing in my face saying he has been drinking 'for months'. We are finished. I am beyond devastated but I am apoplectic with rage that he has been deceiving me and my family, who adore him. I am lost. Where do I go from here? 2.5 years of sobriety he has thrown down the drain. He is respected, loved and admired by everyone who has watched and been a part of our recovery. He has a son. He has a new job. My life is now over as I knew it but I know his life is over full-stop. I am beyond devastated that he has allowed me to waste a year of my life trying for a baby with him. I'm losing my mind.

Pipbin Sat 05-Jan-13 22:08:34

Viv what ever you do now, please don't drink. You have done so well staying sober.
If he will do that to you then I think it is better to end it. Hard I know, but I think it's for the best.

Rache1S Sat 05-Jan-13 22:13:04

Oh Viv I am so sorry. What a horrible shock. Without knowing either of you my initial reaction is that you need to wait until he's sobered up and you've calmed down and have a good talk about it all. It sounds like you've been through a lot already and things might look different in the cold light of day so sleep on it and see how you both feel tomorrow x

Quodlibet Sat 05-Jan-13 22:17:59

Viv I am really sorry too, you must be furious. I agree with Rach about sleeping on it and looking at the situation with fresh eyes tomorrow. I don't know much about alcoholism but I would imagine that relapses are unfortunately quite common, especially in times of great stress? Sorry you are having to go through this.

twinklestar2 Sat 05-Jan-13 22:46:44

Really sorry to hear that Viv, hope you get things sorted.

Boodle9 Sat 05-Jan-13 23:41:38

So, so sorry to read that, Viv - I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now. Am going to echo the same thoughts as the others: As quod said, it must be so bloody difficult to stay straight in times of stress. It's a massive kick in the stomach for you though. Also, Pip's right; Please look after yourself and don't fall into that same awful trap. I think Rach is right too- perhaps a fresh, sober look at things in the morning might help a little? Obviously something major needs to change, but what that is doesn't need to be decided straight away, and certainly not without thrashing it out when everyone is able to think and speak clearly.

MotherOfCleo Sat 05-Jan-13 23:58:45

viv firstly he is drunk and drunk people talk shit! At least I do. Secondly he is hurt and is lashing out trying to hurt you back, not big or clever but very possible.
As the others say, sleep as if youll be able to sleep on it and try to have a sensible discussion tomorrow. He may have felt as down and upset as you did this morning and instead of being sensible and talking to you or a friend he turned to drink, a shitty substance that used to seem like a friend to him. sad
I hope when he wakes up he realised the gravity of what he has done. He loves you and wants to start a family with you, that doesnt just disapear, I think he is just lashing out as a way of feeling in control of something. Thinking of you xx

Sorry to everyone who is having a shitty time. Viv and Quod, unmumsnetty hugs to you both

twinklestar2 Sun 06-Jan-13 01:25:26

Wise words, mother.

Bunnygirlie Sun 06-Jan-13 08:17:35

Oh Crikey I feel bad now having my little whinge.

quod thinking of you and wishing you a speedy recovery so you can get back to DTD!

viv hope things aren't as bleak as you thought last night

Hugs to those that need them!

Pipbin Sun 06-Jan-13 13:03:52

I know I'm being the voice of doom and gloom here but Viv you have to take stock and think if this is a relationship that you want to bring a child into? I know that it will not be a popular thought but I think this is a real time to think things through and discuss them with your DH.

Rache1S Sun 06-Jan-13 14:37:42

Good afternoon ladies, hope you are all as well as can be?

New year, fresh start so do you think we need an update on where everybody is at? I have lost track over Christmas and New Year! Who's next in the POAS queue?

Apologies if anyone is wrong or missed off. I have just copied from the last list I could see.

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

MotherOfCleo Sun 06-Jan-13 15:01:39

Hi Rache

Im on my phone so cant copy but Ive included mine below.
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1 grin

How are you feeling Rache? smile

Rache1S Sun 06-Jan-13 16:03:03

Apart from severe knackeredness I'm good thanks Mother smile Back to work tomorrow could be a challenge! I've added you on smile

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

Boodle9 Sun 06-Jan-13 16:17:11

Hello - hope everyone is feeling OK today? Especially thinking of quod and viv.

I'm going to add myself to the list, although I'm afraid I can't bring myself to put 'BFP due' because it never bloody is!

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

janey1234 Sun 06-Jan-13 16:37:45

I'm on the app and can't for the life of me figure out how to copy and paste... Can someone do it for me?

Janey, 38, just about 14 wks pg

Quod - hope you're bearing up ok. Hear infections are horrible but very common - and generally clear up pretty quickly with no nasty side effects...

Viv - thinking of you and what you must be going through today, either way

Hugs to you both

Bunnygirlie Sun 06-Jan-13 17:12:10

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

Bunnygirlie Sun 06-Jan-13 17:14:13

CD 10 here and still not DTD yet this cycle sad

Feeling bloody awful today, haven't had a drink since NYE but feel like I drank several bottles of wine last night. I'm guessing I either ate something that doesn't agree with me or I'm getting ill AGAIN!

janey1234 Sun 06-Jan-13 17:16:01

Ah bunny poor you, I seem to have had a permanent cold since November so can empathise. Roll on spring and the end of these winter bugs!

Should have said my due date is 9th July.

Neshie Sun 06-Jan-13 18:12:32

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

8dpo here smile

Rache1S Sun 06-Jan-13 18:27:44

Oooo Neshie, not long until POAS time grin

happylass Sun 06-Jan-13 18:56:32

Evening all. Back to work tomorrow after 2 weeks off sad. Gonna be a tiring one, especially as its OV time again! Adding myself...

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

MotherOfCleo Sun 06-Jan-13 18:59:16

Doh got mine wrong, i'm on cycle 4 not 5......just seems longer sad

BelissimaLol Sun 06-Jan-13 18:59:25

Evening all. Blimey so much has happened!
Quod and viv I hope you are both ok.
If one of guy lovelies can add me as I'm on phone?
BelissimaLol 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified!

twinklestar2 Sun 06-Jan-13 19:04:17

Please add me too:

Twinklestar2, TTC 1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan

twinklestar2 Sun 06-Jan-13 19:04:28

And I'm 33

Boodle9 Sun 06-Jan-13 19:30:58

happylass, I'm back to work tomorrow too and I'm absolutely dreading it. I'm a teacher so am sat surrounded by books and sheets and post-it notes of things I should have done earlier in the hols if I had any sense at all...

Adding Belissima's and twinkle's information:

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC 1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.
BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified

retroelement Sun 06-Jan-13 19:32:44

I added myself ...

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC 1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.
BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified
Retroelement, 35, cycle 6, AF due end Jan

happylass Sun 06-Jan-13 21:21:08

Boodle I'm a teacher too and the huge bag of marking I brought home hasn't left my car boot. Just remember: 5 weeks to half term!! wink

Boodle9 Sun 06-Jan-13 21:28:17

grin Counting down the days already, happylass!

The sad thing is, I even did quite a bit of work over the holidays (including six hours of marking on Christmas Eve for goodness sake) and I still don't feel ready for tomorrow! Sigh...

Bunnygirlie Sun 06-Jan-13 21:36:32

Oh FFS I've got the shakes and shivers so off to bed. What's the bet this is another month down the toilet :-(

happylass Sun 06-Jan-13 21:44:55

Ah Boodle I think no matter how much work we do we always feel like there's something more that could be done - nature of the beast! Christmas is the one holiday where I usually don't do any work at all. Had planned to do some this year as we are going back so late but the lurgy put paid to that!! Just 25 more get ups.......

MotherOfCleo Sun 06-Jan-13 22:00:06

any news from viv? dread to think what she is going through sad

MotherOfCleo Sun 06-Jan-13 22:00:41

get well soon bunny

yorkiebilb Sun 06-Jan-13 22:02:44

Hello can I be added to the list please. Been a bit quiet as waiting for my AF to arrive after my mmc and it has arrived today so I'm ready to start again!

Yorkiebilb - 34 ttc %231 cycle 1 after mmc in Dec. BFP/AF due 4/02

twinklestar2 Sun 06-Jan-13 22:26:15

Hope you feel better soon bunny x

Shag week over for me, have dtd 4 days in a row! Am suspicious of CBFM telling me I've ov'd on CD11 as thats way too early so going to keep going just in case.

HazleNutt Sun 06-Jan-13 22:43:15

viv are you ok? And Quod hope you are feeling better. You too, bunny.

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC 1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34, 16 weeks PG, due on 21st of June
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.
BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified
Retroelement, 35, cycle 6, AF due end Jan
Yorkiebilb - 34 ttc %231 cycle 1 after mmc in Dec. BFP/AF due 4/02

yorkiebilb Sun 06-Jan-13 22:44:47

Thanks for adding me hazle

HazleNutt Sun 06-Jan-13 22:47:34

And can I just mention that "back to work"? I wish - my boss firmly believes that we live to work, so during the "holidays" that most people had, I had 25,26 and the 1st off. Must be well rested and relaxed now (she thinks).

A month until holidays - a whole week off, can you imagine! Of course, I'm expected to be available on the Blackberry.
I was considering becoming a teacher until I realized I don't like most kids. Hm, then again, if I think about my own teachers now, that's actually not necessary, is it? grin

MotherOfCleo Sun 06-Jan-13 23:48:09

I went back to work on the 2nd hazle and that was too soon so I feel for you! I wish Id thought about teaching as I would LOVE 10 weeks holoday rather than 21 days.....ahh I guess I can dream lol

Pipbin Mon 07-Jan-13 00:29:03

I'm another teacher back to work tomorrow.
I know what you mean about not liking children Hazle. I love the children in my class, but I find children in public can be annoying.
Why don't you and Mother become teachers. 13 weeks holiday!
Hope everything is ok with Viv.

Oh, can someone update my details on the list, I'm on my phone.
Pipbin 37 cycle 17, unknown AF as lap and dye on the 18th.

retroelement Mon 07-Jan-13 08:33:05

Get well soon, bunny! From the list above we'll be testing at the same time, and it looks like we are also coinciding with illness! I have come down with a horrible cold over the weekend. This is the first month I have been taking my temperature and my phone app has suddenly decided I ovulated a couple of days ago, on CD11. I have a slightly erratic 35-day cycle and was expecting ovulation to be around CD21. I suspect the high temperatures are down to being ill; either that or we completely missed the window of opportunity this cycle.

There are lots of pregnant ladies in the list - a very encouraging sign. Can I ask for your "stories" - how long you were trying for, etc?

HazleNutt Mon 07-Jan-13 08:51:54

Pip but then you get to spend all that time with your own kids! Taking into account all the "oh god when will they go back to school???" threads that are posted during any school holiday, apparently that's pure torture. Now, why exactly are we doing this? grin

retro in my case, we tried half-heartedly (meaning no monitoring, just not using any contraceptives) for a few months in 2011. nothing happened, but I was diagnosed with Graves disease (thyroid) and this affects fertility as well. Endocrinologist told us to stop ttc during treatment, as both the condition and medicine can be dangerous. Got it sorted in May and hormone levels stabilised by about July, so started trying again.

I managed to get pregnant with our second try - using Persona monitor. Unfortunately that one was a chemical pregnancy and lost it at almost 6 weeks. As the doc didn't say we should wait, we didn't and I got pregnant again immediately. So we were very lucky as it didn't take that long.

twinklestar2 Mon 07-Jan-13 08:52:55

Retro - you have been the third person this month that I've heard as oving early! (Including me!). Weird hey?

retroelement Mon 07-Jan-13 09:01:00

Maybe sprouts have some kind of weird ovulation-inducing hormones. I mean, they must have some purpose - it's not like they taste nice or look nice or smell nice or anything.

MotherOfCleo Mon 07-Jan-13 09:14:05

Ok, Ive added pip and tried to put the list in date order so we know who should be POAS next smile

Meant to ask Rache Janey Hazel you guys must have 'announced' to the world now...how did it go? Also are you going to find out the babies sex or are you going to wait and be surprised? I would have to find out, I'm a control freak lol grin

Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC #1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Retroelement, 35, cycle 6, AF due end Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Yorkiebilb - 34 ttc %231 cycle 1 after mmc in Dec. BFP/AF due 4 Feb
Pipbin 37 cycle 17, unknown AF as lap and dye on the 18th Jan.
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Navis176, 35
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster

BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34, 16 weeks PG, due on 21st of June
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 09:27:59

Retro - welcome! Oh and stop the sprout bashing wink. I had them just last night as they are my FAVOURITE VEGETABLE EVER. Yum.
In terms of getting pg, I got pg by accident (unbelievable, I know - especially now I know how bloody difficult it can be) the year before last with an ex, when on the mini pill (and he had tried for years with his ex wife for children and had a poor sperm count). I missed one, but thought I would be fine. Apparently not - the mini pill is (so my GP cousin told me after the event!) different to the combined pill in that if you're 12 hours late you have no protection after all - and somewhat of a fertility spike it would seem. Anyway it wasn't planned, but I decided to go ahead with it on my own, but unfortunately had a mmc diganosed at 12 weeks.
Fast forward to this time with my lovely DP (who I've known for six years but only been with for one) Came off pill and had a funny first month, with bleeding every few days. Next month cycle felt more regular but BFN. Next month took it more seriously with OPK, drinking full milk, eating super healthily (not as in low calorie, but good, home made, well-balanced meals) and got my BFP. That was actually the first month I got EWCM too.
I know I was very lucky indeed, especially at the grand old age of 38...

HazleNutt Mon 07-Jan-13 10:03:37

mother yes we have told family and close friends, also some colleagues. News was mostly met with much squealing and congratulating.

Yes, we're finding out the sex, I don't care much for surprises.

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 11:20:34

mother yes, I've told friends, family, and as of Friday, my boss and lots of colleagues. Boss was amazing actually. Sprung it on him mid-appraisal, and (given my company has been notorious in the past for being taken to court by women whose jobs have disappeared whilst they were on mat leave) even talking about new roles for me, pre or post ML.

Oh hazle I don't know whether to find out the sex or not. DP really does want to, but I think I'm a bit too suspicious somehow. Who knows if I will be able to resist the temptation on the day.

navis176 Mon 07-Jan-13 11:25:09

Really sorry to hear some of you are having a rubbish time - thinking of you

Adding myself to the list....

Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
Navis176, 35, Cycle 3 after mmc, TTC #1, due 18th Jan
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC #1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Retroelement, 35, cycle 6, AF due end Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Yorkiebilb - 34 ttc %231 cycle 1 after mmc in Dec. BFP/AF due 4 Feb
Pipbin 37 cycle 17, unknown AF as lap and dye on the 18th Jan.
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster

BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34, 16 weeks PG, due on 21st of June
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

HazleNutt Mon 07-Jan-13 12:18:25

janey, suspicious? I think that well, it is going to be one or the other eventually anyway, so why not find out sooner?

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 12:24:19

Ha, suspicious. Can you tell I barely slept last night?! Am going mad. Mean superstitious, which is weird, given I'm not superstitious about ANYTHING else...

Oh I DEFINITELY want to find out gender, didn't really give OH a choice, I'm far too impatient to wait! 20 week scan on 12th February so hopefully will find out then.
Can someone update 'the list' for me, I need to be with the other upduffed people at the bottom, I'm due on 2nd July oh and I'm 30, but only for a couple more weeks!

Bunnygirlie Mon 07-Jan-13 13:45:05

Hello peeps, thanks for get well wishes. I am off work and feel bloody awful. Backache, bad nausea since Saturday so assumed it was my IBS until I got the shakes and shivers last night and was sick this morning. Must have a bug which is worst timing ever, need to be DTD this week and then weekend away next weekend more DTD :-(

viviennewestwould Mon 07-Jan-13 13:58:15

Crumbs, ladies, your kindness and support, despite barely knowing me, is really humbling. Thank you. I woke yesterday morning to find Michael sat with his head in his hands, weeping. I was very calm and asked him one question: when did you start drinking? He replied, '11 o'clock yesterday'. When I repeated the question, asking how many months ago he started he looked at me quizzically and said that Saturday had been the first time. I reminded him of his ramblings, his filthy profanities and his insistence that he had been 'at it for months'. He simply shook his head, saying he didn't remember getting home never mind what he said. I became apoplectic. I threw a cup at his head which he ducked from and my cat is only alive due to a miracle of physics. I punched him. I was screaming so violently I was dribbling and coughing.

When I was calmer he tried to imply that Saturday 'had to happen', that it was somehow 'inevitable' after the intense pressure he was under to give me the baby I so desperately want. I went fucking mental all over again. I told him I would NOT take responsibility for his choices on Saturday. I told him that acute stress does not excuse his throwing away our future and his sobriety after nearly three years being sober. I told him he had the tools to resist his demons but that Saturday had been a much-nurtured process of planning and fantasy which he had deliberately hidden from me and which we could have battled together.

My sister picked me up and took me to Mum's where I was comforted and prayed for (we are all evangelical Christians; me - not a very good one). I spent the day being loved like I've never felt loved before. I got this text from Michael in the evening: 'What possessed me to think that my life would be bearable without you in it, I have absolutely no ides. I have clearly made the biggest mistake of my life and yet I don't recall saying "sorry" for ruining your life. I am so sorry for what I have done to both you and your family. I am simply empty now. You said you felt like you were dying. I feel like I am dead."

Bunnygirlie Mon 07-Jan-13 14:34:56

viv I hope this is the wake up call he needs, I hope that after some time apart you guys can work it out. Sounds like he does love you and wants to give you that baby that you both want. Will keep everything crossed for you, hugs thanks

Quodlibet Mon 07-Jan-13 14:49:52

Viv you are a strong lady. My hope is that you can come to a peaceful decision about how you both deal with his monumental cock-up, and of course that he is able to find the resources to tackle his illness. Glad you are getting some RL support.

Another morning spent at EPAU this morning - I had some horrible pain/bleeding/clots last night so went in for 3rd concurrent Monday dildocam action. Have been panicking about infection/possible repeat ERPC but saw v reassuring consultant today and FINGERS CROSSED my womb looks in good nick considering, there is a small bit of tissue left that should resolve on its own, but no infection or swelling in tubes, ovaries healthy etc. So now just have to take it easy and recover. I think I have finally accepted that I have no control here and that there is no point me fretting about work/how long it is taking, that I really do have to just rest up and stop struggling against biology. Trying to take small steps back towards positivity.

MotherOfCleo Mon 07-Jan-13 14:55:00

Oh bunny hope you feel better!

viv I can't even imagine what you've been through this weekend! sad I just hope he has had the wake up call he needed, booze never was, never will be and never can be his friend, it can never be the thing he turns to when he feels alone, stressed, worried, anxious, he should have known that when he walked in the pub and should have called someone to ask for help. It will only weaken his foundations and destroy what he has worked hard to build!
From his text at least he has finally decided to say sorry, that word they find so hard but which means so much to us I really hope you are doing as well as you can, been thinking of you thanks We are always here as a non judgmental ear or shoulder to cry on....you are one of us and we look after our own grin

Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
Navis176, 35, Cycle 3 after mmc, TTC #1, due 18th Jan
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Twinklestar2, 33, TTC #1, cycle 17, BFP due 24 Jan
Happylass, 34. Cycle 5. AF due Jan 25th
bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Retroelement, 35, cycle 6, AF due end Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 4, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Yorkiebilb - 34 ttc %231 cycle 1 after mmc in Dec. BFP/AF due 4 Feb
Pipbin 37 cycle 17, unknown AF as lap and dye on the 18th Jan.
BraveLilBear,
Aquarius,
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31

BelissimaLol, 38, 12 scan on 22nd jan. terrified
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34, 16 weeks PG, due on 21st of June
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.
Purplemonster, 30, PG due on 2nd July

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 15:02:28

viv - so lovely to hear from you. Been a bit worried.
What an awful time you're having. I have to echo bunny - he sounds as if he's had the shock he needed, and hopefully this break will make him realise his priorities, and that losing you and his future with you will be a lot more stressful than trying to make a baby. thanks thanks
Glad your cat escaped unharmed. wink

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 15:04:16

Massive cross post.
quod - sounds like you're on the road to recovery, at long last. Are you getting negative pregnancy tests yet? For me that felt like a massive milestone - and took a tortuously long time. Glad it looks like no further op was needed, and hope you're not in too much pain
thanks for you too x

janey1234 Mon 07-Jan-13 15:05:58

Oh and yes, TAKE IT EASY quod. It's shocking how much it takes out of you, physically and mentally. The emotional pain was horrendous and I guess to be expected of something so tragic, but the fact it was so utterly draining physically took me by surprise.

navis176 Mon 07-Jan-13 15:56:18

blimey viv - such trauma - I'm really glad you have supportive real life family. I can't imagine what you must be going through, but the apology is a positive thing. thanks

captainmoll Mon 07-Jan-13 16:52:50

Viv and Quod you are both incredible, brave women, and I really, really hope it gets better for you both from here. So sorry you are having such shitty times.

Everyone else, I am rooting for your BFPs & healthy scans as ever. What a great and inspirational bunch of people to hang out in the Interweb with. Sincerely hoping 2013 brings us all the healthy babies and happy partners that we all want.

thanks

captainmoll Mon 07-Jan-13 17:35:32

Post Script
Last night we DTD just for fun, and I woke up to find I have pulled a muscle in my shoulder during the excitement. I am now officially old.

Rache1S Mon 07-Jan-13 18:17:11

I'm so glad he's come to his senses and apologised Viv. And I'm sure you've politely informed him that he won't have to worry about getting anyone pregnant if he does it again because you'll chop his nob off and feed it to the cat.

That sounds like positive plumbing news Quod after such a rough ride smile

Really sorry you feel so bad Bunny. Fingers crossed the worst is over and you feel up to DTD when necessary.

Retro we started TTC while on holiday at the beginning of September. The dates were perfect but came home to a BFN, so I ordered a BBT thermometer and a Clearblue Ov Test and it worked first time so we conceived on the second cycle trying. In hindsight I think we were very very lucky as it takes most people much longer although DH thinks it's down to his super sperm.

Mother I had pretty much told close family, a few friends and my boss by about 8 weeks because I am rubbish at secrets. Everyone was really pleased but not too shocked as we hadn't kept it a secret that we were trying. People were more shocked at how little time it had taken! I am desperate to find out the sex and want to pay for a private gender scan now but DH says I am being ridiculous is insisting we wait until the 20 week scan on 11th Feb. Men! grin

And Pip, Happy & Boodle, please can you add me to the list of people who would like to be teachers? I would love 13 weeks holiday!!!

Bunnygirlie Mon 07-Jan-13 18:19:22

Crikey captain lol

Only managed to eat a few crackers today, bad times!

Aquarius1 Mon 07-Jan-13 19:42:48

hi all. so I probably don't have the right to moan after what others are going through but you're a sympathetic lot so...

At 4am sunday morning I was woken up with period cramps. they started off bearable but soon i was up and about searching for the ibuprofen. then i spent over an hour in unbelievable agony. i was crying out (which I never do), writhing in pain, sweating, and even dared calling out for dh despite it being 6am on a sunday (we never do 6am on a sunday - weekend lie-ins are sacred). and (sorry if tmi) i also had diarrhoea. and then af arrived.

I've suffered from period pain (and had prescription NSAIDS) most of my menstrual life but never this bad. it spread to my back, thighs and the whole of lower abdo and I went grey with nausea. i actually thought about ringing 999 and would have if hadn't been for af arriving and the pain eventually subsiding and knowing i'd've just had to wait in a&e for 4 hours. I know it sounds dramatic, but it was the worst pain I've ever felt. has anyone here suffered the same? I am going to the docs as soon as I can, work permitting. someone on another thread who was talking about period pain said it could be caused by endo so i'm quite afeared of what the doc might find. had anyone had this? can it prevent you from getting pg?

moan over and sorry for blurting it all out blush

MotherOfCleo Mon 07-Jan-13 19:43:17

quod im glad things are getting sorted, so sad that you had to go through it all though sad

twinklestar2 Mon 07-Jan-13 19:44:01

OMG aqua that sounds terrible, have you been to the doc?

MotherOfCleo Mon 07-Jan-13 19:45:41

ohh wow aquarius that sounds horrible!!! Im sorry but I have very light pain free AFs, so Im no help to you sad
Really hope the doc can help!

Thanks for adding me to the list Mother. Much sympathy for everyone who is having a difficult time but couldn't help but snort laughing at the idea of Viv feeding her husband's knob to the cat. Sorry. Cats are quite fussy though so I don't think it would be impressed.
Rach your dates are really similar to mine! I feel like I can't wait to find out gender now but OH would have a fit if i suggested spending money on a private scan. Don't even know where would do it in darkest Devon!

Quodlibet Mon 07-Jan-13 21:28:54

Ow Aquarius that sounds hideous! Mine was pretty excruciating last night when the worst of the clots were in the process of being passed, but tbh yours sounds even more painful and intense sad. Loads of sympathy to you. I find it so mystifying how much menstrual pain varies from person to person, I am normally very lucky and last night found myself thinking 'oh my god some people have a version of this every month!' and not knowing how they cope sad. I think it's definitely worth getting it checked out - you shouldn't be having to deal with that. I don't have any knowledge about endo either I'm afraid.

I do wonder if bad pain is something to do with AF starting suddenly/full on rather than easing in, as mine does, which I imagine gives your cervix longer to get used to the idea?!? I'm wittering now sorry.

twinklestar2 Mon 07-Jan-13 21:44:10

Hugs quod x

Rache1S Mon 07-Jan-13 21:56:40

Purple I'm sure a quick Google of 'private untrasound devon' would come up with loads of places <devious face> grin
My DH is just being obstructive because he doesn't want to find out the sex at all whereas I am insisting on it. He is going on a week's snowboarding holiday on the 19th so I keep winding him up that I'll find out while he's gone and he will arrive home to a house full of gender-specific baby gear.

Aquarius that sounds absolutely horrendous! You really must go and get that checked out or you will just live in fear of it happening again.

Boodle9 Mon 07-Jan-13 22:18:53

Aquarius, I don't think I'm as bad as you, but I have painful periods and have done for as long as I can remember. It only lasts about 36 hours but during that time I have to dose up on ibuprofen or feminax, and flout the 'every 4 hours' rule too! If I miss a dose, I will end up being physically sick and pretty much unable to do anything except writhe around on the floor. It's pretty pathetic and has embarrassingly happened at work once or twice. blush Sorry, Quod, but am also going to have to spoil your theory - my AF eases in!

Aquarius1 Mon 07-Jan-13 23:04:27

thanks so much ladies you're all dears. boodle yours sounds worse than mine - at least mine went after a few hours. I can't take too much ibuprofen as it messes up my stomach. so awful having it at work poor you.
do you remember when they used to put codeine in feminax? those were the days...sigh
quod i'm so sorry you're having to go through that and hope the worst of it is over soon if not already.
i think your theory could have something in it - perhaps if I hadn't got up and wandered around and just tried to sleep through it might have 'eased in'?? or might not. who knows. am definitely going to the doc and won't leave without at least a blood test or something.

ps viv really hope you and your oh are working things out

HazleNutt Tue 08-Jan-13 09:44:28

I know my complaints are really trivial compared to some others here, but can I just whine a bit anyway? If I have barely put on any weight, where is all the extra blubber coming from? Am I just full of air or something? Just bought a few tops, a size bigger so I could wear them when I'm oh, 7 months or so. Well, they fit right now. I look like a barrel.

Can I also whine that several of you will have your 20 week scans before me? I'll be on holidays in February during the time I was supposed to have the scan, so will have it only on 19th. Quite concerned that I'll be so far along then (22 weeks), what if there's something seriously wrong?

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 10:21:50

hazle I'm with you. Put on 3lbs in first trimester - all of that within a couple of weeks of finding out I was pg and stuffing my face with carbs . After holiday and Christmas weighed the same - but was HUGE. Although weighed myself this morning and appear to have put another 4lbs on in two days? Argh. Still huge, but just look fat, not pg.

Can't remember if I've moaned about this too, but have no idea what's going on with my skin. Over the weekend my boobs started peeling. Yes, peeling. Big flakes of skin falling off. And then I had a nosebleed and sneezed and blood went everywhere.

I am clearly very attractive at the moment and DP can't take his hands off me. Well, that's how it is in my mind. In reality, I'm still exhausted, full of cold, and have never felt more unattractive in my life, and think DP may well feel the same sad

But I really am not moaning. Lots of you really are having a crappy time. Perhaps my peeling boobs and splatted bloody face can cheer you a little....

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 10:43:17

Hazle why don't you book yourself a scan before your holiday? It might be worth it for the peace of mind.

Another fully paid up member of the barrel club here grin I am finding the body shape psychology of pregnancy difficult. I have always thought I would love putting the weight on and growing the bump as it's a sign of what is going on inside, but so far I absolutely hate it. I hate catching a glimpse of my side profile, especially without clothes, and I find myself trying to suck my belly in to make it flatter even though it's impossible. My normal clothes still fit but are tight, which is depressing, but maternity clothes are still mostly too big so my wearable wardrobe is now really small and I feel like a whale.
I was sitting behind an 8 months pregnant work colleague yesterday (who was probably a similar size to me before,) and she had so much back fat that it was bulging everywhere and hanging over the back of the chair. I couldn't stop staring at it and was horrified! (obviously I told her how great she was looking blush)
I too feel bad moaning when many on here would love to swap places. I just need to work out how to get my head around it.

I would also like to ask opinions on another issue if I may?
I have been researching various baby equipment for a while and had pretty much decided to get a particular pram/travel system which will cost nearly £800 (it's a Which? Best Buy, has won loads of parenting awards, etc). Last week my truly lovely PIL announced that they would like really like to buy us our pram. We tried to say there is really no need for that (we will not struggle to afford it ourselves,) but they are insistent they would like to buy it. We didn't tell them we have already decided on one but now I feel like I should maybe choose a cheaper one because it is way too much to ask them to spend. They are reasonably comfortably off but certainly not rich. Even if we get the car seat separately the pram/pushchair is still £600. What should we do? I don't think I can even bring myself to tell them the price when I'm sure they are expecting maybe £300-400!

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 11:13:04

Rache why don't you talk to them and say that you've actually found exactly what you want but you are aware that is is hugely expensive, you appreciate their offer but couldn't possibly ask them to pay the full amount without feeling guilty. However it is a lovely gesture and you don't want to be rude so perhaps they would consider going halves? Then they get to 'pay' for the pram and you get to not feel guilty?

Just think ladies in a couple of months you will have a gorgeous bump and will be able to feel your little one wiggling around inside you. For the time being be grateful it is winter and break out all the jumpers smile it's a big adjustment not just physically but mentally too I guess.

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 11:28:36

Good advice mother I reckon.

Out of interest rache which one were you thinking of?

Yes to looking like a whale and as someone who has always been body conscious, struggling with it. I know I'm supposed to get bigger, I know, but honestly, it's HORRIFYING even though I know I'm being stupid.

Janey, if it's any consolation I had the most stinking snotty cold over the whole of Christmas (still feeling pretty hellish to be honest and have been ill for WEEKS) and pretty much EVERY time I blew my nose, which was obviously a lot, it bled. It got to the point where I thought if I disappeared for a few days and the police looked in our bathroom bin they would have some serious concerns about my welfare. It was seriously gross and one of those things that nobody warns you about pregnancy.

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 11:41:45

Thanks Mother, it is certainly something we will consider as I can't possibly ask them to spend that much. DH agrees but is not exactly full of ideas considering they are his parents!

Janey we are I am reasonably certain we would like the Uppababy Vista although I haven't actually seen one in person yet. It has great reviews though and I really like the Carlin Green colour.

HazleNutt Tue 08-Jan-13 11:41:53

Rach the sonographer suggested it, guess she didn't have time earlier, I've heard this scan can take quite a bit of time and it's a busy office. At that time I wasn't paying that much attention to the weeks. But I'll have a doc appointment end of January anyway so I'll ask if they can squeeze me in earlier.

As for the pram - if you really want a certain one (I think we've chosen ours as well), I wouldn't agree to get another just because the PIL wants to buy it and you wouldn't want him to spend that much. As Mother suggested, maybe go halves? Or he could get pram and you'd get pushchair part yourself, if it's possible to buy them separately?

Oh and NO to travel systems, lalalalala fingers in ears not listening. OH keeps asking me what kind of pram/cot etc etc etc I want. I don't know! how am I supposed to know! I've never had a baby before, the whole thing is too big and scary and there is too much choice so I'm firmly sticking my head in the sand and forgetting about it before it sends me mad. He made me pick a blind for the 'nursery' the other day and having to do that nearly sent me into a meltdown as it was.

HazleNutt Tue 08-Jan-13 11:44:34

I think the new Bugaboo Cameleon would be the one for us - as we have 2 big dogs to walk as well, the pram should be able to also handle more difficult terrain.

Oh Rach how is puppy doing by the way?

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 11:58:15

I was looking at the Cameleon in Mothercare (one I have actually seen in person) and liked it quite a lot. I think what has swung it for me on the Vista is that the carrycot is suitable for overnight sleeping so we won't need a moses basket, just a stand (Uppababy's stands are nearly £100 but Kiddicare do a compatible rocking stand for £20).

Our doggy is an absolute angel says his totally unbiased mummy grin He's nearly 6 months now. I can't believe how fast it has gone! He's very excitable, as all puppies are, but he's generally very good and I think he will be absolutely fine when baby arrives.

Purple you're only delaying the inevitable grin grin grin

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 13:53:25

Can I please thank you all for your kind concern. I promise I have read all your posts before writing this. I am lucky to have found this thread, I feel, and not because you are all such good listeners. You are all so insightful and, although my current issues are non-ttc ones, I know you don't mind my coming here. I have learned so much this weekend. Michael's relapse has taught me that living out the rest of my life without children is not the worst thing that can happen to me. It is losing Michael to alcoholism. It is losing myself to alcoholism. It is losing my family, my sanity, the love of my life. People are complex and good people do bad things - this is the first thing we learned in rehab.

Michael turned up at my mum's yesterday - I had the shock of my life - two trains, three buses and an on-foot odyssey. He stayed for an hour and I discovered the thought processes and emotions behind relapse. Thankfully, Michael has not been drinking 'for months' - Saturday was the first time. I knew this in my heart because His behaviour and moods have not been erratic and I have never once smelled alcohol on his breath (and we kiss alot). He has thrown himself into his new job recently in a way that has made me so proud of him (he hasn't worked in five years thanks to addiction). You cannot do that if you are drinking.

I eventually asked him to leave my mum's and when he did I was broken. I ached for him. Half an hour later I rang him and he was about to board his first train. I told him to wait, that I was coming...
We are looking to a future together - wiser, stronger (hopefully) and with a little bit more respect for the power of this horrible addiction. I have learned that we are not 'special'; just because we conquered rehab and the last 2.5 years does not mean we are immune to complacency or heartache. Saturday could so easily have been me staggering around our house. I have found myself thanking God that it was Michael and not me. I have thanked God that we have been reminded of the insidiousness of this addiction and that we are fallible. We have been shown the consequences of hiding our thoughts and fostering nostalgia for the 'good old days'.

I told Michael that he needs to think very hard before deciding to give us another go because if he doesn't learn to deal with his stress more effectively he is in danger of another relapse (which, he knows, I will not stick around for). I have told him in no uncertain terms that there could be another four years of my yearning for a baby. I cannot see how - despite my perspectives shifting a little - I am suddenly going to stop yearning. He has to know that and he has to devise ways to deal with the concommitant stress. I told him I want him to unshackle himself from every single habit-forming action: smoking; energy drinks. I have told him I don't expect him to quit smoking immediately but I've asked him to come up with a date in the very near future. He quit energy drinks immediately. I've told him he must still go to his footie matches. He needs the release and football is not a trigger - stress is.

I love him more than I have ever loved any man and will fight for this relationship. I've realised I want him more than I want a baby. Of course we will continue on this ttc journey but I have decided to not take Clomid this month. I want to see the results of my day 21 bloods after not having taken the drug; I think this will be useful knowledge when I begin IUI soon. I've also set up my new CBFM for the first time and wanted to give it a fair chance of deciphering my hormones without Clomid being present.

I'm so sorry for the long post. I'm shit with synopses.

Quodlibet Tue 08-Jan-13 14:11:37

Viv that sounds like very sound thinking to me. Good things come out of bad situations - my MC has also made me realise how very important and special my relationship is to me, which can so easily get lost in babyfog. It sounds like this massive incident has allowed you both to address some big issues that were all a bit intertwined and clear the air. I wish you success. It sounds like there is a lot of love and commitment and strength there in the face of the really challenging circumstances of addiction.

On another note, bucking the trend:
<drumroll>
BFN! HURRAH!

(ok there is the faintest, faintest impression of a line on a very sensitive stick, but my levels have clearly fallen in the few days since I last tested and got an instant strong line.)

In other (grisly but weirdly compelling news) I think I passed the last bit of tissue yesterday evening. It was exactly the size the consultant said it would be. I have never been so pleased to see something so grim (I even showed DP - he was weirdly delighted too, I tell you what this MC business opens up whole new vistas in your relationship). Today I feel much much better about everything.

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 14:15:48

Quod - utterly brilliant news about your womb, ovaries and everything else being in good nick. I hope you are finding peace through all this x

Aquarius - how scary and horrible. I hope it's a one-off anomaly - will you be pursuing the medical profession for some answers?

Rache, set your stall out early when it comes to your spending decisions. You mustn't feel guilty about the price of the pram you want (you have to push the bloody thing and it's your baby's safety at stake). I would be honest with the PILs and tell them your heart is set on a pram which is, unfortunately, expensive thanks to its brilliance and safety. Tell them you'd be chuffed to buggery if they felt they could contribute towards it. I very much doubt the PILs are so naive as to think a pram costs a mere few bob these days.

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 14:25:16

Viv that sounds a very clear, well thought through path. Nobody is perfect, I know I'm not! It sometimes comes down to not what you can live with but what you can't live without. I really hope everything works out, I think a month of clomid is a good idea. Thinking of you. xx

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 14:26:03

Quod, my lovely, we crossed posts. It's bitter-sweet, this reconciliation, in that I feel so overwhelmingly right in my decision to move forward with the relationship, yet my emotional bruising hurts so. It has frightened me, Michael's relapse. The 'forgiveness' thing I find very easy. How can you not forgive human frailty? Protracted deception is quite another thing, I think, which made it such a relief when I realised he had not been drinking for months. Michael is finding his situation bitter-sweet, too. He cannot quite believe that I have forgiven him; he feels terribly unworthy still, and he is emotionally battered, too. He is going to have to get his head around the meaning of 'unconditional love', I think. He has never experienced (given or received) true love before he met me. His alcoholism covered two decades and the road to love was never one he had travelled until he got sober. He finds it hard to believe that someone who has led his life and done the things he has done could actually be not only admired and respected, but loved. He will have to figure all of this out if he is to allow his confidence to build.

HazleNutt Tue 08-Jan-13 14:47:39

Viv very glad to hear you have managed to work things out - well, considering the circumstances. I'm sure it must be an incredibly difficult time for you.
Quod good news, so back to dtd or did the doc tell you to wait?

As for the buggy prices, I do believe the GPs might be shocked if they have no other recent grandchildren. Even my DH said "HOW much?!?!?! shock shock " when i mentioned the Bugaboo price grin
I'm sure you can get something totally fine for a fraction of the money, but on the other hand, we're not going all out with special color-coordinated nursery or anything, so might as well spend a bit more on certain other things.

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 14:53:11

Argh! I keep crossing posts. Thank you, Mother and Hazle. My decision to stay with Michael certainly doesn't feel like a desperate need to not be on my own (goodness knows it would be easier to walk away) or to have a baby. Those 'needs' have, quite suddenly and unexpectedly, taken a back seat. Life will never, ever cease to amaze me. You just never know what is lurking around the corner (and this, happily, applies to terrific things, too) smile

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 16:54:00

Ah viv your posts have honestly made me cry. I am so, so happy that you have managed to forgive him and from the other side of a computer screen, it's incredibly clear how much you mean together. I truly hope that this awful time has made you stronger and that together you will go on to conceive a perfect little baby very, very soon.

quod - there's nothing more wonderful than a BFN after the torture that is a mmc at 12 weeks. I'm so glad that it looks like you can finally begin to put it behind you to some small extent. And yes, it does bring out strange things in you; I went through the MMC on my own as my parents were at their house in France, my ex lived abroad and we were on the verge of splitting up, and my brother lived abroad. Plus I didn't want anyone else with me. But I vividly remember discussing with my brother the size of the clots I was passing, and how they measured against my fingers, so he could ask his consultant brother in law for medical advice. I have to say I never thought I'd be having that conversation with my little bro, but the barriers just seemed to disappear. Grisly indeed, but essential - and I'm glad it was exactly as expected so you can now know it is over. I can't begin to imagine how awful this has been for you both over the Christmas period, but hopefully 2013 will bring everything you deserve.

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 18:05:21

Thank you, Janey, for that lovely, lovely message.

Bunnygirlie Tue 08-Jan-13 18:06:10

Evening all!

Viv so pleased to hear things are looking up, relationships and TTC are tricky enough even without adding the problems you and OH have been dealing with, I cannot imagine how tough it is.

Quod Glad to hear you have your BFN - that feels so odd to type. Hopefully your body will be back to its fertile state soon!

CD12 here and still no DTD, I still feel like crap - so nauseous and tummy pains like period pains. I wonder if its a touch of food poisoning sad

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 18:17:44

Yay for Quod's BFN!!!
Now I never though i'd be typing that on here!
What an absolute shitter of a time to go through but I'm so glad for you that the worst seems to be over and you're feeling much better grin

Viv you describe your situation so well with your words and you can really tell how much he means to you. Nobody is infallible and everyone deserves a second chance and I'm so glad you're giving him one grin

Hazle the travel system will be our only extravagance. We want to sell the house and move next year so we're not even decorating a nursery as such as it would definitely put me off buying if I was viewing a house with giraffe wallpaper. We've already got a neutral coloured spare room so we'll just put some baby-friendly pictures and curtains up. I don't even think we're going to buy a cot until he/she needs one probably at around 6 months old. And FFS, the price of changing units!! They're just a chest of drawers with rails on the top to stop the changing mat falling off and they're bloody £500 in Mamas & Papas! We will be getting normal drawers from Ikea!

Thanks for the responses, I have been thinking more about the PIL pram situation this afternoon. I think just telling them the price and then saying we will be pleased with any contribution is probably best, or even suggesting they buy the car seat which will be £150-200.

twinklestar2 Tue 08-Jan-13 18:50:39

Glad to hear that you and OH are managing to sort things, Viv.

CD16 here. Have dtd 5 times this year already and it's only the 8th Jan!

BelissimaLol Tue 08-Jan-13 19:09:13

Gosh you lasses can talkgrin
Viv I'm glad you have sorted or out and I'm also glad you have taken him back. I don't like to see relationships end.
After my mc I was the same on the baby front. My DH has an incurable condition which I don't like talking about and him being healthy is my main priority. So for example if his medication meant I could not conceive I would not want him to stop taking it. Luckily it has happened but it was not the only thing that could make my life happy.
I'm going to join the head in the sand crowd on the pram. I don't even know how to start. I won't do anything until 12 weeks anyway but I had a quick read, got overwhelmed and decided I don't need one yet.

happylass Tue 08-Jan-13 19:44:03

Ah so glad today's news is much more positive.

Viv so glad you have sorted things and sorry you've had such a rubbish few days.

Quod pleased to hear things are getting better for you too. Continue taking it easy.

Cd 9 here so just gearing up for 'shag week'. Shame it had to coincide with back to school week though as I'm absolutely zonked!!

Bunnygirlie Tue 08-Jan-13 20:08:58

PG ladies, I love to hear about how you all are and hearing your experiences about getting your BFPs etc

but, can i make a personal plea that you don't clog up the thread chatting about prams etc, we would all love to be struggling with that tough decision so I feel there may be better threads to be discussing that subject

hope i'm not being a hagbag but had to say how I feel. Please don't go away for good though [happy]

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 20:37:00

ahh rache your puppy sounds lovely, mine turned into a right pickle at 6 months, she really started testing the boundaries. Im sure puppy will welcome the new addition. smile Mine loves cuddly toys so now doubt that will lead to tears.

I have a very poorly tummy this week, this had better sort itself out im on CD7 (or is it 6 confused ) ive got some serious BDing to do over the next week or so! <cape is ready and waiting> grin

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 20:52:17

Bunny, I fear you are right. And on that note I shall duck out. I will spy take a peek from time to time to see how you're all getting on but shall go elsewhere. All the best to all if you, and hope you all get your BFP's very soon and will be clogging up the thread with your own good news. smilesmile
Pip - hope to cross you being hilarious soon and that you get your BFP soon
Quod - keep in touch, for very obvious reasons I genuinely care very much for your plight. I really hope things work out for you soon.
Viv - you're a relative newbie to our gang but have made quite and impression! As I said earlier have been very moved by your story and truly hope you both get the BFP you deserve very soon.
Other pg elderberries - hopefully speak to you all on the pregnancy (or - argh - childbirth) forums soon.

You've all set high standards and I will not be joining any groups with bad grammar or talk of babydust!

Genuinely all the best to you ttc-ers x

twinklestar2 Tue 08-Jan-13 20:56:36

You don't have to go janey!

Must admit though when I read what the pg ladies were saying I was thinking I wish I had that problem!

Aquarius1 Tue 08-Jan-13 21:00:13

bunny sorry you're not feeling well.

i am also a bit of a hagbag- would prefer less of the pram chat.... Feel free to go forth and graduate lovely pg ones.... But keep in touch too...

Best wishes to you janey

Re:the weight gain- my weight goes up a few pounds every month before af -I'd love it if it was because of pregnancy * sigh *

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 21:11:04

ahh Janey shame hun......missing you already. sad Good luck with everythinf and please pop back and see us. smile

HazleNutt Tue 08-Jan-13 21:14:06

janey where are you heading now? There's probably not enough of us for a separate thread yet.

BelissimaLol Tue 08-Jan-13 21:20:45

There is a thread for over 30s first mums to be on ante natal. I had a look and it seems our type of people. What do you think? I feel we should go together.

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 21:21:05

Hazle - I don't know, we do manage to bang on a bit! I'll start one on pregnancy and see how many of us elderberries join us?

janey1234 Tue 08-Jan-13 21:22:52

I mean ante-natal clubs, prob a better place for our waffling...?

BelissimaLol Tue 08-Jan-13 21:23:18

That's a good idea. I see you there grin
I'll still hang around here and see how you girls are getting on.

BelissimaLol Tue 08-Jan-13 21:23:50

Go for it Jane grin

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 21:27:08

no hazel bells dont leave too sad

BelissimaLol Tue 08-Jan-13 21:32:36

I'm still here lurking checking how you doing. But don't want to upset anyone with baby talk. That would upset me as well and ttc is hard enough as it is!

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 21:46:35

PG ladies, please can you let me know where you're going or if you start a thread what you've called it?
I have enough trouble finding the new Elderberries thread when we need one! grin

Ladies, I am not going anywhere because I am far too nosey and excited for you all to get upduffed too. I will however become pretty much silent and cease all baby talk forthwith. All the best to the lot of you and I hope to see you on the other side very soon grin

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 22:11:54

yay rache im glad you're staying, fingers crossed I can talk pregnancy with you soon smile

Boodle9 Tue 08-Jan-13 22:19:37

Goodness me it has been busy on here today! I am so pleased that things are picking up for both of you, Viv and Quod!

On a lighthearted note, I for one don't mind the talk of prams too much...but if the talk of teachers having it good with their "13 weeks" of holidays continues, I might end up having a hissy fit having to issue forth some statistics to show this to be something of a fallacy! grin

MotherOfCleo Tue 08-Jan-13 22:38:25

haha boodle amen to that grin

Bunnygirlie Tue 08-Jan-13 22:39:42

Oh god I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to push people out, I just wanted a little less pram chat that's all.

Did I speak out of turn?

Maybe start a PG elderberry thread we can all hopefully join in the future?

I feel bad now sad

Pipbin Tue 08-Jan-13 22:42:28

So I had my pre op today for my lap and dye. I was so worried that I would be too heavy and over the 30 BMI that I haven't eaten much for the last couple of days. As it was she weighed me and told me not to worry. Hurrah.
We have had an offer on the house, but lost the one we really loved.
Poor old DH spent all day yesterday clearing out the cellar, which is no mean feat when the head clearance is 6ft and you are 6ft4. Which meant he didn't have the energy to DTD, I have been plying him with drink tonight so hopefully we should get it done tonight. That said, my op is in ten days and although they say they test for pg before they go ahead I wonder if it would show as I don't think I've ov'd yet.

Viv sounds like you have a good plan, just take it slow and make sure you make the right choices.

pg ladies I will be sad to see you go, make sure you keep in touch and call the thread the Elderberries thread so we can find you when we all get our BFPs, Janey I'm planning to join you in a month or two.

Pipbin Tue 08-Jan-13 22:44:35
Bunnygirlie Tue 08-Jan-13 22:48:02

Crikey pip you go girl!

P.s. hope all goes well with op, I have to admit I don't know what one is. Off to google I go.

Bunnygirlie Tue 08-Jan-13 22:48:38

Apologies again if my comments upset anybody x

Rache1S Tue 08-Jan-13 23:01:39

Bunny I can't speak for the others but I see what you mean and it's absolutely fine so absolutely no need to feel bad. It's not that long ago that I was TTC and I completely appreciate how mentally tough it can be.

Janey has started a 'Graduated elderberries' thread in Ante-natal Clubs so we hope to see you all there soon, and if any of you want to stop by for a chat and a brew now I am sure you will be very welcome.

Good news on your pre op Pip and good news on the house. It sound like this is shaping up to be your year grin

Boodle9 Tue 08-Jan-13 23:21:10

Love that article Pip/Emily! smile Well said, you! I think unless you teach, or you live with a teacher (Poor DH...) it is very difficult to appreciate how intense it can be, even with the holidays! At a family gathering last year (summer half term) I was getting ribbed about it - 'another week off...in at 9, out at 3...' blah, blah, blah. I sweetly pointed out that yes, I was very lucky, I only had 31 reports to write that half term - 2 hours each to write, proof read, and print...a 62 hour working week! Bliss... hmm

On a serious note, I do sometimes wonder whether it affects my health. I do find it a stressful job (some of that I know is particular to my current position) and I worry it might be having an impact on TTC. Either of you feel that way ever, Happy and Pip?

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 23:45:57

I'll be sorry to see you go, Janey, you seem lovely. You, too, Hazle and other leavers. Bunny, don't feel bad - these ladies know exactly how you feel and won't resent you for speaking up.

Thank you, Boodle and Pip, for your messages of support. Pip, can you remind me why you're having a lap & dye, please? How does one know when one needs one? confused

I'm CD2...how depressing is that? sad I set up my brand new CBFM today! hmm

viviennewestwould Tue 08-Jan-13 23:56:48

Happy, Bellissima & Bunny, I thank you, too, for your kind words.

Pipbin Wed 09-Jan-13 00:10:54

I don't get too stressed with my job tbh, so I'm not sure. But I do know that I'm far less inclined to DTD when I'm stressed.

Viv. The lap and dye came about because I had been referred to the fertility clinic by my GP. They established all was good with him and my levels were good, cycles regular etc. So next was an HSG when they essentially blast a load of dye up your foof and X-ray it. This showed that one tube is blocked and the other was not up to standard. So the lap and dye is the next step where they have a poke about and clear the tubes. If they can't clear them then off to IVF.

viviennewestwould Wed 09-Jan-13 00:23:23

Thanks, Pip. Would you say I don't need this kind of exploratory work due to having been pregnant last January? I haven't had a BFP since and I can't help wondering whether there's something wrong.

HazleNutt Wed 09-Jan-13 06:31:07

No problem bunny, I'll still be checking how you're all doing as well. But you're right, it makes more sense to have a separate thread for all the pram and nursery talk.

Pipbin Wed 09-Jan-13 07:45:13

Not sure Viv I have never been pregnant so I guess that the blocked tubes have stopped that happening.

Bunnygirlie Wed 09-Jan-13 08:14:15

Phew, glad I haven't upset anybody.

I just thought PG ladies might get fed up with talk of ov sticks, cm, poas BFNs and AFs and TTC ladies might not want to read about prams and getting fat.

Us TTCers hope to join your new thread soon to chat about all things baby smile but please pop in for a cuppa now and again.

retroelement Wed 09-Jan-13 16:25:24

Ugh, I am still ill, which is really making the temperature charting thing pointless. And last night my downstairs neighbours had an all night party. I am SO TIRED and so broody that I cried at the Aviva advert (look how happy the whole family is when they become grandparents at the end!).

I am about to book very expensive flights to visit a developing country next month; the kind of place where everyone gets food poisoning and would think twice about going if they were pregnant. This tips the odds towards a BFP this month, right?

And to shove my noobie oar in, I think it's nice that people want to stick around after they get their BFP, for the sense of community, but I agree that it would be good if the actually-going-to-have-a-baby topics could be discussed elsewhere.

viviennewestwould Wed 09-Jan-13 17:32:52

Retro, you wouldn't be going to the Dominican Republic, would you? shock

Boodle9 Wed 09-Jan-13 20:36:21

Retro Sorry you had a crappy night and are feeling ill too, but I totally hear you on the Aviva advert! Had never noticed until TTC but so many adverts are centred around a very stereotypical family set up and life path, and they always sting a little bit.

Thing that bothers me most at the moment though is that I seem to know a lot of new grandparents/grandparents to be, and they keep going on about it being 'the best gift they could get'. My rational self knows exactly what they mean, but there's a little bit of me that hates it and thinks if it were only so easy as getting someone a gift!

Ladies - I need some thoughts on a potential problem I have. My scans (abdominal and potentially vaginal...the dildocam!) are next week and I've just clicked that will be 10DPO. Fine for most people but, assuming a normal month for me, I won't get that far and it will more likely be CD1/2.

I don't want to cancel it as they could still do the abdominal scan (Doctor said they might not even need to do the vaginal - just depends.) but is that selfishly hogging a slot someone else could have if they do need me to come back in?

retroelement Wed 09-Jan-13 20:41:18

umm no? (I am worried I have missed a huge piece of news about a tragedy in the DR and you will all shun me)

retroelement Wed 09-Jan-13 20:42:25

(sorry for cross-post with you boodle, that was in response to viv)

retroelement Wed 09-Jan-13 20:51:07

Boodle, I don't have direct experience of this, but I think you should go, and not worry about it. They will do the tests they can do, and hopefully that will move things forward and get you first in the queue for dildocam if that's what's needed.

The only person you'd be bumping is someone like yourself, so your needs are just as important. If someone needed an emergency scan, I'm sure they would get one whether you were there or not.

Aquarius1 Wed 09-Jan-13 21:04:34

evening all
pip glad your pre-op went well. sorry about your house situation - great that you had an offer though in this market! hope it was a decent one?

retro sorry you're not feeling well and boo to your noisy neighbours - that'd drive me mad.

boodle I'd say don't cancel as you never know. I find sometimes my period is late when i'm doing out of the ordinary or waiting for something (like eg on both holidays last year). yours could be delayed or if not at least it would be worth going for the abdominal scan. it'd be a shame to have to go back on the waiting list. i'm probably a bit selfish but I wouldn't worry about hogging a slot- they may well not be able to fill it at a week's notice anyway??

I'm off to the docs tomorrow. hope i can get some help - there's no way I'm going through such horrendous cramps again (unless there's a baby at the end of it)

Boodle9 Wed 09-Jan-13 21:06:57

You know what, as soon as I had typed that, I thought 'sod it! I'm going anyway...' 17 cycles of TTC necessitates selfish behaviour! (But if I was still on the fence, you'd have convinced me, retro!)

Boodle9 Wed 09-Jan-13 21:08:45

Cross-posted with Aquarius -you'd have convinced me too! Good luck at the docs tomorrow - you definitely don't want to go through that sort of misery for nothing!

viviennewestwould Wed 09-Jan-13 21:55:39

Retro, I totally missed the 'developing country' bit and homed in on the 'everybody gets food poisoning' blush

Aquarius, it's good to hear you're going to seek answers for that horrid pain you had. Good luck.

Pipbin Wed 09-Jan-13 22:46:13

Well the person who put the offer in on the house has vanished! The Estate agents asked her to come back in with her agreement in principle and they haven't heard from her since. However we had another viewing and they loved it and are coming back on Saturday for another look. So who knows, could be a bidding war!

As far as TTCing goes DH seems determined to get the job done, whether I'm awake or not!

Bunnygirlie Wed 09-Jan-13 23:00:47

Still not getting any action here, I was ill Monday and hubby still not 100% and had stressful day today, he has tomorrow and Friday off work so fingers crossed no work will help the situation. We are going away fri/sat nights so hopefully will be a dirty weekend if we're not too late already that is!
Started ov sticks again this month and no positive today but guessing tomorrow is the day so weekend may be too late :-(
Hubby started getting heart palpitations last few times we tried to DTD, nit sure if stress related or could be recovering from cold but docs wants to check his thyroid so he has blood test tomorrow, hope it isn't anything nasty or I'll feel very guilty for making all this fuss confused

Pipbin Thu 10-Jan-13 00:09:54

Just a heads up Bunny but it took me about 3 cycles to find exactly the right part of the day for me to test to get a positive.
If you don't get a positive this month, don't get worried.

Bunnygirlie Thu 10-Jan-13 08:13:08

Thanks pip I did try in November and think I got a positive, first wee after getting home from work 5.30ish so fingers crossed I get one again this month, just not yet lol

I bet I get it tonight now and as we haven't DTD it'll be wasted sad

Bunnygirlie Thu 10-Jan-13 08:15:27

retro feeling any better?

viv how are things?

twinklestar2 Thu 10-Jan-13 09:38:13

Had a meltdown last night after watching OBEM. Thought I was strong enough to handle it but I'm not. Spent about half and hour crying