TTC after recent mc - Thread 2

(994 Posts)
woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 08:28:35

Hi everyone - I've started the new thread as our original one is nearly full.

I really hope that this is the one where we all get our BFPs and don't have to experience any more heartache.

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 09:26:22

Thanks for the shiny new thread Woody! I second the sentiment - here's hoping for BFPs all round!

Leading straight on from where we left off - what's FMU? Off for a google...

Messtins thanks, you and me both - fx it won't be too much longer or at least if it is the doctor will finally do something about it! Hope you don't follow suit, sending prompt AF vibes your way (or a BFP of course!)

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 09:31:37

Aaah thank goodness for google. Woody I don't think FMU would make a difference, it's still a BFN and has been for weeks - tbh it's more concentrated after a 12 hour shift than it is first thing in the morning anyway because I always forget to drink at work. I'll be trying again next Sunday anyway so it'll pick up then if I just missed it, but I just can't stand the constant testing any more 'just in case' - I'm having to be strict with myself before I have a breakdown! xxx

MunchinMango Mon 08-Oct-12 10:01:28

Just marking my place and thanks woody for the new thread.

I third that and really hope this thread will see us all get our bfp's!!!!

janiewoozle Mon 08-Oct-12 10:13:42

hi girls, room for another? smile new on here (unfortunately due to mc last week) but feeling positive and have my fingers crossed for everybody. got the ovulation tests off ebay - only £2.50 and worked last time so hopefully once my body sorts itself out we'll be able to get on the DTD bandwagon once again xx

littlepinkfizz Mon 08-Oct-12 10:32:35

Just marking my space< lifts leg gracefully and marks> x

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 10:41:36

Do you think that you can have symptoms before you can get a BFP on a test? So, can you start feeling nauseous before you have enough hcg to come up on a test? I'm pretty sure that the first time that I got pg, I started feeling sick a bit before I got my BFP. And when I first started testing, I was getting almost invisible lines so I know if I'd tested when I started feeling sick, I would have got BFNs.

Hi janiewoozle - sorry that you've had to join us. You sound really positive though about ttc again. I've started using ov tests for the first time this month.

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 11:53:16

Ha fizz you're such a lady!

Hi janie sorry you're with us but nice to see some positivity! Mental note to self to do some happy thinking. I DO believe in Aunt Flo, I do, I do! (worked for Tinkerbell...)

Woody I'm sure you can. My friend knew she was pregnant about 2dpo because she started throwing up, her husband didn't believe her until she got her BFP two weeks later! Am hoping good things are a-brewing for you!

Can anyone tell I've got a day off today? Must do something constructive other than pootling on the internet looking for miracle cures for missing AF! Oooh, I know, I'll go and brush the dog's teeth, and then maybe I'll go mental and wash the sofa covers. My life is so glamorous..

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 11:59:15

yorkshirepeanut have you thought about acupuncture to bring on af? Apparently it works really at doing this, regulating cycles etc!

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 12:11:49

woody great minds think alike, I've got my first appointment booked with the lady with the needles on Thursday at 3. Hopefully she can stab AF into obedience!

kittykatskumkwat Mon 08-Oct-12 12:44:49

Pink!!! Yuck
Welcome janie, sorry you've had to join us
Woody, yes I believe you can, my friend tested because she was feeling sick, got bfn tested again a few days later and she though bfn again although left it over night and a very very faint line, she ruled it out and then a month later under her mums insistence did another as she felt so Ill and she was and almost 12wks!!

messtins Mon 08-Oct-12 13:25:08

Hello - was going to say "just marking my space" but Pink has put me off! Welcome janie sorry you find yourself here but hope your positivity is soon rewarded.
I do acupuncture on my dog, do you think if they showed me the points I could do it on myself and save forking out £40 a time? grin

Lolcbcblemonlime Mon 08-Oct-12 13:26:10

Hello marking my place smile

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 13:33:24

messtins I don't think I'd be able to put the needles into myself!

Ah I hope she gets it sorted yorkshirepeanut

I really hope this constant nausea since Saturday is a sign!

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 13:39:16

messtins your dog lets you poke it with needles? I can't even make mine sit still long enough to brush her stinky chops! She just keeps eating the toothpaste

janiewoozle Mon 08-Oct-12 14:01:40

thanks for your welcomes - and yes i'm doing my best to feel positive - hope i can pass on some positive vibes!

i would be really interested in the accupuncture! i'd never herd of it for regulating your cycles. i always had really irregular periods (50days) so i might look into that. how soon after mc would you try it? or i also heard of angus cactus? anybody have any experience with that

littlepinkfizz Mon 08-Oct-12 14:04:20

Sorry girls for putting you off! Couldn't resist! < chuckles>

MunchinMango Mon 08-Oct-12 14:12:08

Eh girls - woody, kitty, peanut, this new talk of feeling pg but getting bfns for a while before bfp has started me symptom checking and hoping again. I was eating an apple this morning and my teeth bled a little. They always bleed when I'm pg. seriously though I think it would be a miracle. i I just have to wait it out I guess. Woody fx for you.

Welcome Janie, sorry you had mc but fx for future.

Pink lol!!

Messtins your fog gets acupuncture?? Pity you couldn't self administer alright.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 08-Oct-12 14:13:23

Hello, marking my place too smile
Welcome Janie sorry you find yourself here. Please feel free to share your positive vibes with me.
I really really want to try acupuncture again but my DH is sceptical especially as its not cheap! I'm sure it helped me get pregnant with DS though and my cycles were all over the place.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 08-Oct-12 14:15:11

grin littlePink I seem to have missed that! I did choose a nice place to mark though wink

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 14:48:35

janie agnus castus is supposed to work by affecting your prolactin levels, which in turn affects how much FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) and oestrogen you produce. It's supposed to help regulate cycles, and you're meant to take it from CD1 until ovulation. There haven't been any studies showing overwhelming success but a few show a correlation with improved fertility in women with irregular/missing periods. In any case a systematic review has concluded it's safe to take as long as you're not on any fertility drugs - so no harm trying it! You can get it at Holland and Barrett..

Phew. Think I geeked out there for a minute. Hope nobody got hurt in that particular Attack of the Nerd.

janiewoozle Mon 08-Oct-12 15:14:26

thank you for your nerdyness! might give it a whirl - as you said, no harm in trying and it would be cheaper than accupuncture! x

JellyCurls Mon 08-Oct-12 15:15:08

Hey ladies, can i join you all? I had a cp in august and although i went from getting bfp to bfn i never had a real bleed. Still waiting on first visit from AF since, now at 45 days (or 37 from day i got bfn) and shes still absent. Any ideas to get things back on track?

MrsJLS85 Mon 08-Oct-12 18:27:24

Hi ladies, just popping in to say hi, I've been a bit MIA as I've had horrible (but lovely and reassuring) morning sickness. Am now past 6 weeks, so really hoping this is the one. Going for an early scan next week.

Fingers crossed to you all - I'm sure this new thread will bring everyone their BFPs!!

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 20:59:31

jessie really good to hear from you and glad that everything is going ok.

Hello jellycurls sorry that you've had to join us but this is a really nice thread (I think). Have you been to see your GP? The only thing I can suggest to try and get af to start is to maybe look into acupuncture. I've just started having it (to hopefully help me conceive and then have a healthy pg - FX) but I've heard that it can be used to bring on af, regulate cycles.

Hello babyjames how are you doing? The place that I go to for my acupuncture has a multi-bed room - basically there's a few of you in the same room have acupuncture at the same time but it makes it a lot cheaper. I've definitely felt a lot more positive since having the acupuncture, although I can't really explain why.

munchin when do you think you'll test?

Well, I'm still symptom spotting even though I promised myself that I wouldn't so now as well as the nausea, I have very mild cramping/twinges in my lower abdomen and my boobs feel weird - they are almost tingling, I can't really explain it.

scaredmummy2B Mon 08-Oct-12 21:13:35

Found you all again I def won't be ttc for a while but would like support after todays mc :-(

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 21:28:51

Really sorry it didn't work out scared

Lolcbcblemonlime Mon 08-Oct-12 21:33:52

Stick with us hun. Are u off work? I needed a week to lick my wounds before I went back.

littlepinkfizz Mon 08-Oct-12 21:44:30

So sorry scared so so sorry xxxx

MunchinMango Mon 08-Oct-12 21:53:26

Ah scared really sorry to hear about your mc. There are no words to comfort you. Life really sucks sometimes!!! Take care and be kind to yourself.

Welcome jelly, this is a great place to hang out.

Good to hear from you mrs aka Jessie. Sorry you have bad ms but its a good sign that all is well good luck at your scan.

Woody my af is due Wednesday but I think I will leave it til sat if af doesn't show. Snap to your symptom spotting I've sore boobs, salty taste in mouth and twinges as you describe. If I'm not pg I just want af to hurry the fc uk up!!!! I've had enough of this wtf madness. What about you?

Wow peanut you are a fountain of knowledge.

Hi to everyone else. Good luck with appoints, scans, testing or ttc.

YorkshirePeanut Mon 08-Oct-12 22:10:54

Aw so incredibly sorry to hear that scared. Hope you have plenty of support in the real world and manage to take a bit of time out to look after yourself. You've had such a rough ride. Sending virtual hugs.

jelly hello and sorry you're here, but welcome! I also have a well and truly messed up wtf cycle, have booked acupuncture on Thurs to try and bump-start it so will report back!

woody and munchin I'm vicariously symptom spotting through you, given the lack of any of my own. Mentally egging you both on for a BFP!

Ha munchin I take full advantage of uni access to online medical journals for my own personal benefit grin

woody17 Mon 08-Oct-12 22:26:15

Yes mango I'm fed up of trying to read my body and it playing tricks on me! I'm going to test on Thursday morning - I'm going to Rome for a long weekend on Thursday so want to know if I am. I think it'll be too early as ill probably be only 10/11dpo. And that's if the ewcm yesterday didn't mean anything. I do seem to have ov really early this cycle but it is a wtf one so I guess anything is possible!

messtins Mon 08-Oct-12 22:43:55

Scared I am so sorry it didn't work out. Many hugs. Life really is shit sometimes.

Welcome to * jelly*

Should point out that I am a vet so am allowed to stick needles in dogs! It's not something I am massively into but my dog has a brain tumour that gives her neuralgia (nerve pain) down one side of her face and acupuncture is the only thing that is helping. I think it's a very interesting area to explore (in all contexts!)

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 09-Oct-12 00:13:06

Oh mess how lovely to be a vet <cries at thought with lovely dog with brain tumor>
Not a fan of needles but trained as a dentist so used to stick them on people's gums.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 09-Oct-12 07:42:07

Welcome Jelly

So sorry Scared such a terrible thing to have to go through again. sad

I'm still bleeding a small amount and am a bit worried about the pain in my left low abdomen. I don't remember this last month. Should I call the GP do you think? Don't want to cause a fuss for nothing! Also I don't feel ready to return to work yet but feel a right fraud. This 2nd MC has really affected me and keep randomly crying and wanting to sleep. My job involves families in crisis point with young children. It's very stressful and I cant afford to make mistakes. My Mum called in last night and she has urged me to get a Doctors note for a week but I feel terrible about it. If only things were different sad

scaredmummy2B Tue 09-Oct-12 08:10:29

Thanks everyone the bleeding has slowed but because of my history the gyny ward have told me to go in through a and e so just gonna take dd to school then go down there I have a bit of support at the moment the feeling of de ja vous is killing me the most just feel like all I've done since xmas is get pregnant and visit one unit or another at the hospital! Last mc I was off work for a long time they lost their temper said I'd lose my job if I have any more time off so Im pretty sure I'll be going to work at 3 today as I can't afford to lose my job :-/

woody17 Tue 09-Oct-12 08:48:48

Ah messtins that must be a brilliant job? I'd love to work with animals (I think). I hope that your dog is ok?

And lol do you still work as a dentist?

babyjames I think that you should definitely go to the GP if you are still bleeding and having pain. Are you still getting +ve tests? I think that it sounds like your mum is right - you shouldn't feel bad about having some time off - you've been through so much. After my 2nd mc last month, I have found that it's helped to feel like I'm doing something - hence the cutting out caffeine, seeing homeopath, acupuncturist, nutritionist. It's probably doing nothing but it has made me feel more positive about what has happened over the last few months. You are bound to be grieving - not just for the baby that has been lost but also for all the hopes and dreams that end with the mc. I really hope that you are ok and that you are getting support in RL.

scared hope you get on ok at the hospital. Thinking of you.

Well, I'm feeling really bleugh today - really nauseous - this is the worst that it's been. And the side of my boobs (almost under my arms) are really sore - tender to the touch.

messtins Tue 09-Oct-12 09:46:27

Scared thinking of you today. The can't count time off after a MC against you - same with all pregnancy related sick leave. Something to do with the sex discrimination act. www.workingfamilies.org.uk/articles/parents-and-carers/rights-during-pregnancy-and-maternity-leave/miscarriage
I went back pretty quickly this time and have found it helpful to be busy, but you need to at the very least get the horrid physical bit over with first.
baby james it must be very hard to go back to an environment full of young families. You need to take time off until you feel strong enough to deal with that.
woody really hoping this is a BFP on the way for you.

Thanks everyone for caring about my dog thanks She was diagnosed with a trigeminal nerve tumour at the base of her brain about a year ago, but is pretty happy really. She's lost all the muscle on one side of her face and has nerve pain on that side, but the acupuncture is really helping. When she had her scan I thought that was it for her but she has been very stable since, so hopefully we'll have her a while longer. On the plus side it has set me off on a new path as I'm now quite interested in training in veterinary acupuncture.

scaredmummy2B Tue 09-Oct-12 14:53:17

Thanks messtins just emailed that to my boss coz he's an arse am now sat at home with my feet up instead of no the way to work! There not convinced I had a mc sure they think it was just a bleed and I'm over acting but giving the bleeding pain and my history you can't blame me well dday is Friday got a scan at epu to see Wats going on

Hope your all ok

So sorry about your dog messtins
babyJames hope your ok know wat your going through I was terrible after my 2nd this one I'm just kinda num

Thanks everyone else for your kind wishe's can't list you all but you really help thanks and I hope your all ok going to rest now as my mum got dd and dh2b is at footy tonight so a nice sulky evening with chocolates for me x

posyplum Tue 09-Oct-12 16:10:25

Hello everyone. I can't believe our little thread made a second page - woo!

I have also been MIA as I have been trying to ignore ttc this month. I am with you Woody, feeling bit nauseous, bit crampy (not grampy!). I am 12dpo and have somehow managed to hold out til now. Planning on testing at the weekend as I am fed up of giving clearblue my money!

Hope everyone's well - jessie pleased to hear all those symptoms are so strong!

So sorry to read about the recent mcs and BFNs sad Big fingers crossed that this is our thread. xx

suzydelarosa Tue 09-Oct-12 16:55:05

scared so sorry about your mc. I don't know what to say except that it is rubbish and look after yourself.

After endless shagging from CD10 to CD18 I got a BFN on Monday and an early AF. Man - it really is not a good month! More trying in October...

Oversubscribed fertility services at hospital have cancelled my recurrent miscarriage appointment because they have no room - am going to be menopausal before I get to see a specialist about my angry uterus!

messtins Tue 09-Oct-12 17:07:39

scared will keep everything crossed it is good news on Friday, but can understand given your previous experiences why you think the worst. Hope you are wrong.

scaredmummy2B Tue 09-Oct-12 17:43:05

The only time in my life I ever want to be wrong but had more cramping since hospital so I'm not hopeful just want Friday to come so I can move on either way!

I'd like a heartbeat or nothing not something with no heartbeat on the screen as I could really do without another d&c

posyplum Tue 09-Oct-12 18:05:44

Sorry you're having such a rubbish time scared - big hugs.

Messtins hope your dog is OK - sounds like a fab career change is in order...

xx

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 09-Oct-12 18:11:02

Messtins I also hope your dog is ok. Really miss having a dog around the place. Good to see you back Posy FX for testing at the weekend. I have spent a fortune on Clear Blue products! I found that when I MC last week that the Tesco Own brand had the line present for longest as hormones dropped. They cost £3 something for 2 I think.

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 09-Oct-12 19:12:54

Mess that sounds very good. What breed is she? I love dogs and want to haw one almost as much as I want to have a baby. But working full time would mean leaving them alone and DH days its unfair.
Woody erm I hate blood blush so didn't make a good dentist lol! Am now a bank manager. Love that much more!
Scared I do hope u r wrong and there is a chance. I'd second what mess (or was it someone else?) said about being off. Like I said I work for a big bank and manage about 25 staff. I even have to give people time off for ivf with no questions asked! It is part of equal opportunities and your employer needs to respect that. Don't be bullied into going to work!!!

scaredmummy2B Tue 09-Oct-12 19:18:02

Thanks lol I'm gonna go back tomorrow my choice I need to. Keep busy before Friday and I don't get paid for sick as I haven't been there long enough but if I need to take it I will now thanks x

posyplum Tue 09-Oct-12 20:51:23

Ooh thanks for the tip baby. £3 for 2, what a bargain. There is a big Tesco on my way to work too [tempted].

I hope you are feeling ok now. Good to see you back too. I know what you mean about being surrounded by pregnant women - practically all my mum friends seem to have had their second this year. I agree about stupid doctor comments too - one day I'm going to write a big rant about my mc experience doctor-wise, I've been saving it up ;)

littlepinkfizz Tue 09-Oct-12 22:08:35

scared good luck for Friday and for managing to get yourself through every day until then. Don't be bullied by your boss but if it feels right, then certainly go back. We are all very different in how we cope with things.

This is a lovely thread of people. All so genuine and caring. It's like the big Lemsip chair!

messtins I'm currently attempting to train a v lively 6 mth old boxer! It's 3 steps forward and 2 back! V difficult to get her to walk to heel! She's adorable but so excitable,bless her.

Poor you suzy . How is it when you think have something signed and sealed,it goes tits up for no apparent reason? Fx for November x

posy AF due on sat but if she doesn't show by fri will test then. Have already a clearblue which came with the opk's so this should be sensitive enough? Really really praying it's good news for us x

Thought of you this evening baby when I made an apple crumble! Would pass some out but my lot made short work of it. Hope you are feeling more positive and ready for the action again!

Hi to all the other ladies!<waves and blows kisses>

Please let this be my month blush

BettyFlutterbly Tue 09-Oct-12 23:09:59

Hi ladies.
Have been a bit busy trying to organise flights etc for me and dd so we can get to uk for my Grandad's funeral. Everything seems c**p at the moment and even on here there are so many people with sad stories to tell. Life's tough!

Got another bfn on Sunday and then af about an hour later! I was so sure I was pg. I used my last test and I'm not going to buy any more untik I am at least 5 days late next month (you can remind me of this when I start poas at 6dpo!)

Lets hope that this thread is a lucky one.

Welcome to the newbies and sorry for your loss.
Hugs for anyone whi needs them.
Good luck to all the girls in the 2ww.
And fx for for bfps and sticky ones.
I'm so happy for those of you who are pg right now. X

messtins Wed 10-Oct-12 08:02:26

* Betty* I'm sorry about your Grandad. I hope you manage to get the practical stuff sorted. How is your DD coping? Boo for BFNs - hope this is your month.
I got first AF post MC today. Should have known because I felt crap yesterday - really down. Ah well, CD 1, onwards and upwards. I'll keep you company on testing late - I'm pretty good at not POAS (one of my few virtues).

lolC my dog is a heinz 57, mostly terrier, and she's 13. I don't think we'll be getting another when she goes. I rescued her when she was about a year old, but then I was single and could take her to work with me, neither of which still applies. I don't think we'd cope with a puppy again, couldn't give it enough time. She's the perfect fit for our family really - old enough to be happy to doze the day away but still up for an hour sauntering round the park with the boys on their bikes. We'll really miss her when the time comes.

suzy that's really crap about your appointment.

MissMedusa Wed 10-Oct-12 10:26:52

I'm still here too. Still recovering emotionally and physically but I'm back at work and things are getting better. I had my post op check up yesterday and everything seems to be ok. I still have a bit of spotting 13 days later but I guess that's not outside the realm of normal. I think I am slowly starting to come around to the idea of TTC again although I'm still pretty scared.

Can I ask those of you who got PG again quite quickly after your MC, how long it took you to TTC before you conceived the first time? Judging by this thread it does seem to be true that we are more fertile after MC as there have been a lot of BFP's which is such a good sign.

suzydelarosa Wed 10-Oct-12 13:42:31

missmedusa - I got pg in April and had a mc in May; was pg again at end of June then mc in July.

So I seem to get pg easily and certainly easier after mc. Unfortunately while I really want to get pregnant and keep the pregnancy, my uterus doesn't!!!

messtins Wed 10-Oct-12 15:08:27

Having a crap day today. Bumped into an acquaintance in the supermarket, who gave me a hug and said "I heard what happened, I'm sorry" before proceeding to spend the next 10 minutes telling me all about her new pregnancy. There was no need for it, she's not showing, I wouldn't have guessed, she could just have let me find out on the grapevine at a later date....I am trying to be charitable and think in being awkward about the miscarriage she was just burbling on without thinking, but really, how tactless!
First day of AF and feeling rubbish, it's bringing it all back. TBH today I'm not even sure I want to get pregnant again - we were TTC for a year before the MC, I don't want to put my life on hold for another year of getting my hopes up and having them dashed every month. It just feels really unfair that we wait so long for a BFP and then lose the baby when for some people it seems to come so easily. We definitely want another child - I just want a crystal ball to see that it all works out ok before committing to another pregnancy. Being pregnant after loss is rubbish, instead of being happy to get a BFP you just immediately feel really vulnerable. I can't face losing a third baby.
Have two colleagues who both had babies the week after I MC, both whinging on Facebook about sleepless nights and I just want to slap the pair of them.
I think I've hit angry and unreasonable!

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Wed 10-Oct-12 16:09:34

Hi all,
Big hug for you Messtins , really what a tactless woman! shock You deserve to treat yourself today. Each flipping AF is like a slap in the face sad
I have also been trying for #2 a while now and MC in August and again in September. I had a major meltdown last night at bed time with proper sobbing blush DH just doesn't get it. He first was saying lets relax more about it and it will all be ok. He wants to stop the ovulation sticks etc. When I got upset he then said maybe we should forget it all together as he can't bare seeing me like this sad I am massively grateful to have my lovely DS but just feel our family is not complete and feel so sad after 2 MC. I agree that now any future pregnancy will be a total worry.
I often feel like telling people to stop whinging about their kids on facebook. Really winds me up!

woody17 Wed 10-Oct-12 18:05:57

So, I'm still feeling nauseous pretty much all the time and my boobs are sore/tingling - they are now tender to the touch kind of under my arms, right on the sides of them. I'm trying not to get my hopes up as I'm only about 9/10dpo (I think) but it's hard not to. Anyway, I'm off to Rome first thing tomorrow morning for a long weekend so I think that I'm going to wait and test when I get back. The first time I fell pg I definitely felt sick before I got the BFP but I didn't get a BFP until the day after af was due so I don't think there's any point in testing this early - what do you all think?

posy I really hope that you get a BFP at the weekend! FX.

Suzy that's terrible about your appointment - have they rescheduled it yet? Sorry that af arrived.

messtins I think it'd be really interesting to explore acupuncture for animals. There must be a lot of ways that it could help ill animals. I have a dog and I absolutely love him!

lol that's quite a career change! Glad that you are now doing something that you love.

littlepinkfizz where are you in your cycle? I really hope that you get a BFP soon.

bettyflutterbly I'm really sorry that you are having such a tough time. Sorry that af came. I've almost convinced myself that I'm pg but I think I'll end up being really disappointed - it's so hard.

messtins sorry that af came. Your acquaintance sounds very tactless. It's so hard isn't it? Like you said, why do some people get pg straight away and then have no problems? I am desperate for DC no 1 but it just feels like it's never going to happen some times. I don't think that you are being unreasonable at all.

missmedusa it took me about 5 months to get pg the first time, I had a mc, had one af, got pg again and then had another mc. I'm waiting for my first af or BFP after my 2nd mc. I hope that you are getting lots of support in RL.

babyjames my DH sounds a bit similar in that's he's really relaxed about it all and just feels that it will happen eventually...whereas I want it to happen now!

littlepinkfizz Wed 10-Oct-12 19:05:45

Oh have a wonderful weekend woody and I hope it gets topped off by a really BFP!
AF due sat but been lightly spotting since last Saturday. Wish she would just come xx

woody17 Wed 10-Oct-12 20:10:35

Could it be implantation bleeding?

MunchinMango Wed 10-Oct-12 21:00:42

Hi woody, I have fx for you. But hope you have a really great time in Rome. My pg hallucinations are continuing also. Still feeling nauseas, sore boobs comes and goes and slight crampy feeling. I'm on cd 28 today. I've decided not to retest til sat. I think it will be easier to deal with a bfn at weekend and no work.

Messtins Betty and Suzy sorry that af came. That's awful Suzy about your appoint. Messtins your acquaintance was very insensitive to say the least!!! Betty so sorry to hear about your grandad.

Medusa glad to hear you are coming out the other side.

Baby it is perfectly natural to have a good cry. It's part of the grieving process. Although I suppose it's hard on the dhs seeing us so upset. Hope things start to look more positive soon.

Scared sorry you are in limbo and I really hope you get good news on Friday.

Posy and littlepink hoping yous get bfp's at weekend. We need some happy news.

Wow lol that was some career change dentist to bank manager. I'm afraid of the dentist!!!

How are our pg ladies doing Jessie and kitty?

Waves to peanut, jelly, janie and anyone else I have left out.

messtins Wed 10-Oct-12 21:51:14

woody have a fab weekend. Hope it's good news on your return!

YorkshirePeanut Wed 10-Oct-12 22:04:36

Evening all!

Second of two long shifts over and done with, finally got time to say hello - I've been lurky-lurking from my phone at work but just can't be doing with typing on the teeny tiny keyboard.

posy, woody, munchin and fizz FX for you all - hoping for BFPs all round! Agree with munchin, we need a happy fix!

scared poor you, the waiting is bloody awful, I had to wait 3 days for my scan and yo-yo'd between being hopeful and gutted. Didn't work out for me but keeping my fingers crossed that you get good news.

messtins I could happily plant a foot up your friend's backside for being so insensitive - yes, probably because of awkwardness but still! Dumbo!

baby Hugs! I could have written your post. My DH is also struggling to know what's going on with me - he seems very placid about everything, whereas I'm rabid about getting pg again and am constantly up and down, with occasional psycho outbursts. He thinks I'm mental - so do I half the time confused! Hope you feel better soon x

And hello to everyone I missed out!

Very excited about going to see the acupuncturist tomorrow. DH is telling me not to get my hopes up - he's not really into happy clappy woo-woo stuff. Nor am I really but acupuncture seems to get results, who am I to argue! Anyway I can't help hoping I'm going to come home tomorrow, AF is going to arrive with a bang and then we can get on and make babies. I know it's unlikely, but it would mean so much to just feel normal again, even being able to join in with the monthly AF grumble would make me feel better. I don't like being broken with no end in sight sad. FX the acupuncture helps eh!

Right, off to bed, my brain is fried. Night night one and all. Hope the sandman brings babydust tonight! x

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Wed 10-Oct-12 22:33:05

Good luck with the accupuncture Yorkshire I really would like do be doing that too but DH also not a believer!
Enjoy Rome Woody smile

kittykatskumkwat Thu 11-Oct-12 07:42:27

Good luck peanut, hope af arrives or bfp!!
Missm, I took me 18+ months to get pg with dd then I fell pg as soon as I stoped bf before af, mc had one af fell pregnant again mc then fell pregnant again so I'm alot more fertile, not sure if it was mc or pregnancy that's contributed to the difference?
Good luck testers!! Woody I dont think it matters when you test if it was neg you could put it down to being early but do what will allow you to enjoy your Holliday the most would be my advice!! Hope you have an amazing time, I am off to Egypt tomorrow and doubt I'll have Internet access so will anxiously check in on you all when back
Scared, I hope you get good news tomorrow!!
Mess, that was very insensitive and it must have felt like a double blow being on af sad hope this is your month

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Thu 11-Oct-12 09:47:57

Have only just caught up with this thread

scared so sorry this is happening to you again sad

messtins I am not prone to violence but I want to slap your friend. Don't let the insensitive cow get to you.

woody enjoy Rome, fx for a good result for you.

MissMedusa Thu 11-Oct-12 10:47:39

Thanks for sharing your stories. We have been TTC for a year, DH had motility issues but they are better now and at his last test his counts were normal. It's hard to accept that it took us a year just to get here, what if it takes another year before anything happens again :-(

messtins I really feel for you, either your friend is so unimaginably thoughtless or there's something malicious about her. How could she be so stupid?

scaredmummy2B Thu 11-Oct-12 16:11:27

Thanks girls but I'm bleeding a lot and very sore today so any hopes I had for tomorrow have faded hard :-/ 3 mc in ten months just seems a bit harsh to me!

messtinspeople are so bloody insensitive sometimes! After my 2nd mc my friend came round and told me she was pregnant like 2 days after I came out of hospital from the d&c thankfully I was given the heads up from my man that she was going to tell me as he's friends with her husband! This allowed me to lay screaming and crying for 3 hours before she got here! I coped with the News very well to her face. A bottle of wine later she decides I'm so comfortable with the news that it was appropriate to show me the baby clothes she brought for her baby people just don't think and to top it all off now I'm having my 3rd mc she is just getting her 20 week belly and I can't escape it as she lives bloody next door :-S

How was acupuncture peanut?

How you doing woody did you give in and test?

littlepinkfizz Thu 11-Oct-12 16:54:49

Poor you scared . Its terrible and harrowing for you.

woody did you test this morning? Hope you are enjoying Rome!

Well been v lightly spotting( barely enough for a liner) since Sunday.af due on Saturday and did a FRER this morning - bfn. So disappointed. Fooled myself into thinking it was implantation bleeding( I mean, does anyone actually get this?)
Do not know what is happening . Have hack 2 normal cycles after mmc, 28 and30 days. Really pissed off and tbh feel like knocking all this ttc on the head.
Have no idea what is happening now to my cycle. This was my 3 rd mc and my cycles all returned to normal.
Any ideas? X

littlepinkfizz Thu 11-Oct-12 16:57:10

Have made an appointment with my gp next week. He'll probably tell me I'm peri menopausal. Great

messtins Thu 11-Oct-12 17:10:11

scared I'm so sorry you are going through this again. Life sucks sometimes.

pinkfizz I had my very sympathetic GP point out that my fertility was dropping and my MC risk rising every year past 35. Thanks for that. I'm 37, not a spring chicken but hardly ancient.
Last time I MC I had bizarre cycles for months afterwards. When do you think you ovulated? Could it just be a long cycle? (is there still a chance of a BFP-in-waiting?) Hope either BFP or AF has arrived before your appt to set your mind at rest. I think it's frustrating but normal for cycles to be a bit strange for a few months afterwards, hopefully not a sign of anything sinister.

littlepinkfizz Thu 11-Oct-12 17:31:49

I got a smiley on opk on day 17 * messtins*

posyplum Thu 11-Oct-12 19:17:31

Peanut am laughing at 'happy clappy woo-woo stuff'!

Woody have a fab time in Rome! I'm weljel!

Well ladies, AF arrived today, bang on time. So much for this post-mc fertility!! Oh well. On we go! Will catch up with the rest of the thread and post shortly. xx

littlepinkfizz Thu 11-Oct-12 19:22:20

Really sorry to hear that posy Thought we'd be celebrating together but maybe next month... [grun]

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Thu 11-Oct-12 19:47:46

So sorry Scared . It really just doesn't seem fair does it. People who have never been through it just don't understand but actually being that insensitive is quite shock . Have you considered counseling at all? I'm going to ask my Dr I think.

I also grin at 'Happy Clappy woo-woo'
Sorry AF arrived Posy sad
How is everyone else?

posyplum Thu 11-Oct-12 20:09:10

Hi littlepink sorry to hear you're feeling down. I felt exactly the same earlier when I started bleeding, just so disappointed. Had convinced myself I was pg and when I first started bleeding also started to persuade myself it was implantation bleeding (before also concluding, when is it ever that?) I then wondered if it was a chemical pregnancy... but AF has arrived exactly on time!

I am starting to think that this is going to take a bit longer than I had hoped and that maybe mc will delay things a bit. Maybe my body just isn't ready again yet. It's so frustrating though isn't it.

Messtins when you say you had strange cycles for months after mc, what were they like out of interest? I am so sorry to hear about your friend - what an insensitive idiot! I hope you're feeling better today. I can't get over how ridiculous some people can be ref. saying things. It's like they don't know what to say so go into inappropriate overload. A close friend of mine told me, after hearing about my mc, how quickly she had conceived her kids (first time, both times!) and how fertile she must be. She didn't mean anything by it, and would prob have been mortified to have clocked how insensitive it was, but it really wasn't helpful at the time!

I hope you're feeling better today. I totally know how you feel about 'not even sure I want another one'. I mean I know I want another one but sometimes I am not sure I can face all that may or may not come before it. I can't not keep trying though, so have to plod on!

posyplum Thu 11-Oct-12 20:49:31

Scared so sorry you think you are now mc for the 3rd time. That is so rubbish. Big hugs - life is so unfair sometimes. I can't believe your friend! Seriously insensitive.

babyjames sorry to see you had a meltdown yest - hope you're feeling a bit better today. I am a bit with you on timeline - really thought I would be well into my 2nd pregnancy now, in fact it's 7 months since we started trying and various things including mc have prevented it from happening. I had a moment today of feeling sorry for myself about that and if i hadn't been on a train might well have started sobbing too! (though I might have got some funny looks!)

YorkshirePeanut Thu 11-Oct-12 21:21:56

So sorry it was a BFN fizz. Mystery cycles are so bloody frustrating, must be even worse having thought you'd gone back to normal. I hope your doctor is sympathetic and actually does something rather than giving you the brush-off. Is there still just a chance you tested too early?

posy rubbish that AF arrived. There always seem to be so many stories of people catching straight after MC, makes you feel worse when you don't - I was convinced I would...mind you, I suppose I'm technically still in my first cycle, all 70-odd days of it, so there's still time for me grin! Hope this month is the one for you.

scared - just loads of hugs really.

baby how are you getting on? I think counselling sounds like a good idea, honestly I think it's shocking that it isn't offered as routine when you have a MC. It can be so traumatic both physically and emotionally and they just wave you out of the door and say, 'hope we don't see you again'. Helpful.

MissM poor you. We've only been trying since May and I'm already going doolally. I really hope it happens sooner for you this time.

Well been for acupuncture, wasn't quite what I was expecting but the lady was lovely, she normally works alongside GPs and was quite shocked that the doctor had told me to go away and wait for a year. She suggested I go back to the doctor and ask them for ?ovulation charting? and that if they say no I find another doctor! She also did her thing with the needles, a few in each hand and foot and (oh the horror) some in my squidgy belly! I can't say I even felt them go in which I think she was a bit disappointed with smile. She's promised to send me some dietary recommendations and a couple of titles of books she thinks I could benefit from reading - so I'm quite impressed with her overall approach, although it remains to be seen if her professionalism translates into a cure. Will be going back next week and taking it from there and not freaking out and calling her a fraud if AF doesn't show by tomorrow

Oh, and following a conversation today with a 'friend' (I use the term loosely) I have decided that my new pet hate is people saying, 'at least you know you CAN get pregnant' - oh yes, that's very comforting. It's great to know that I have on one previous occasion been totally capable of getting and staying pregnant for at least 8 weeks. Thanks for that, I now feel ever so reassured angry.

Sorry, mini-rant over! Taking myself to bed before I remember other annoying things people have said and work myself into a state of frothing apoplexy! Night all xxx

Quinandthem Fri 12-Oct-12 20:45:04

Hi girls,

I was reading all your posts yesterday and it's like you all know me – I have been through every feeling that you have – from hoping each month is going to be the one – and then disappointment, trying to analyse every twinge/boob change, from trying to have sex whilst ovulating without making it boring (seems like nothing takes passion out of sex then trying to conceive), OH doesn’t understand all the feelings that go through my mind.

My OH and I decided to start TTC in Jan, in prep I came off the pill 3 months earlier (after being on it for 13yrs!), by some fluke we actually fell pregnant in late December (although didn't know it so spent xmas and new year drinking), but unfortunately I had a mc at 8 weeks.

To be honest whilst it was obviously sad, I understood that 'things happen for a reason' and just thought we would fall pregnant straight away. Well it hasn't happened.

My cycles seem to have settled to 30 days after bouncing around from 30 to 45! During the long cycles my boobs would swell up (like a football pump) and I would get all excited but the tests were negative and the period finally came – but that hasn’t happened for the last 4 months.

Starting to get concerned – at what point do you seek help and does the pregnancy/MC strike against you?

To make it worse (as always seems the case) my close friend and my step sister were pregnant at the same time, friend had hers in August, mine was due Sept and step system has just had hers today.

Anyway, good luck to all of you

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Fri 12-Oct-12 21:12:58

quin hi welcome to the thread. Sorry you are here. I think you have to have three mc before your GP will refer you for any additional tests.

peanut I so know what you mean about people saying inappropriate things. I have a bit of a list. Yours is number 1

1) at least you know you can get pregnant
2) things happen for a reason (true but hearing it doesn't help)
3) you just need to relax about the whole thing.
4) it could be worse (when I told a friend I had had repeated early mc / chem pregs her response was "well it's no where near as bad as my sisters experience - it's true she had a much worse time but I made me feel I wasn't allowed to be upset over my losses)

I love a good rant.

YorkshirePeanut Fri 12-Oct-12 22:48:20

Ha hopeful don't start me on the ranting, I could honestly write the book on what not to say to someone who's had a miscarriage! I'll add number 5 to your list: 'you're not still upset are you?' oooh the angry chunterings DH has had to listen to!

Quin hello! Sorry you've had to join us but welcome nonetheless. Do you mean you haven't had a period for the last 4 months or haven't had a long cycle with pg symptoms? Either way, if you've been trying for 10 months I guess you've got a good case for going to the GP for ovulation tests. If your cycle's fairly regular they can do hormone tests to check you're ovulating. I'd go see them and don't take no for an answer!

I had a major breakdown today and have just spent two hours weeping on the kitchen floor and making DH frantic. No idea what started me off, but the waterworks went into overtime. DH was lovely, made tea, stroked hair, assured me that we will have twenteleven sproglets one day (didn't help, but I appreciated the sentiment). Even attempted practical suggestions of stuff that might help distract me from obsessing. Am feeling slightly better now, more annoyed at myself for getting so upset about something I can't do anything about. I hate feeling frustrated!

Lolcbcblemonlime Fri 12-Oct-12 23:55:23

Agree completely on what not to say!
Adding mine- "at least it was early do if was not a real baby" I nearly thumped the girl from work who said that!
Sorry u down peanut. Think we all have days like that. Have u any children? How old are you? I feel the same sometimes and even think I should forget about it. After all I got pg with one shag in the month and no ttc related attics other than an app!!!

scaredmummy2B Sat 13-Oct-12 08:13:39

The main thing I hate hearing after a mc or TTC two very simple words

I'M PREGNANT
Goes right through me making me feel sick to the stomach

Lolcbcblemonlime Sat 13-Oct-12 08:16:24

Agree scared! How are you by the way? How is the bleeding? Have u been off work? Hope your heart is on the mend x

Quinandthem Sat 13-Oct-12 09:15:33

hi yorkshirepeanut, i've had regular periods for the last 4 months but there is no fluctuations in hormones/boob tinglings/etc and we're dtd in the 'window' so i'm concerned that nothing is catching - hence why i was questioning if i'm ovulating.

hope everyone has a good month

YorkshirePeanut Sat 13-Oct-12 11:05:37

quin in that case I'd get yourself down to the GP and ask for ovulation tests, they're just blood tests. The NHS website says if you're over 35 you should wait 6 months without conceiving and if you're younger it's a year, but I know if it were me I'd be down there by now - in fact I'm already pestering my GP and it's only been 3 months haha. Hope they can help.

scared agree! And then I hate feeling bad about feeling grumpy about someone else's good news. No-win situation! What did they say at your scan? Hope you're ok xxx

Quick update - had some light spotting last night and this morning. Hoping to goodness that the acupuncture has sparked some sort of hormone party and AF is on her way. Mind you, have previously had similar spotting and nothing came of it. FX this time's the real thing!

Have a good Saturday everyone xxx

scaredmummy2B Sat 13-Oct-12 11:23:15

Not good today physically drained bleeding still going feel very weak and dizzy and can't remember the last time I didn't have pain in my belly its really getting to me now the tears are creeping up on me today but trying to fight them back as I know once I start I probably won't stop for a few days :-/ dh2b is trying but he's struggling today too bless him and the kids are just getting on my nerves any little thing they do not fair but something I can't help its like here it comes I hate feeling like this and feel like I have all year :-( I'm also pissed off with the hospital ah when they first spoke to me they said I def needed to be admitted coz I was losing a lot and feeling like crap nearly passing out then the doctor came down and said we need to keep you in for 24 hours at least and told them to do my bloods to check I'd not lost too much an I v was also mentioned ! Next thing I know I'm being sent home till next week then I heard the hospital is full because of the other local gyny ward was full! Feel like I been proper brushed under the carpet like I gotta pass out and call an ambulance to get seen grr so angry, upset and pissed off all at the same time sorry rant over

scaredmummy2B Sat 13-Oct-12 11:24:05

Oh and here come the tears f**king Marvelous

messtins Sat 13-Oct-12 11:58:35

So sorry (((scared))). If you need to cry then cry. Can your DH take the kids out and give you some space? Going to bed for a bit and having a good weep will probably help in the long run. Thinking of you.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Sat 13-Oct-12 12:47:57

oh Scarred this really is the pits sad As Messtins said it maybe good if DH or someone can take the kids out for a while and give you some space and time to cry. I have had a few meltdowns this week. I agree about the NHS as had similar experience with them. If you feel too poorly then you must go back though.
I was at GP yesterday as had constant abdomen pain for over a month now. Just got to wait for a gyny appointment they said. Hope my tubes are ok.
Anyone fancy some cake. It's my Birthday. [cake] Ive had better but filling my weekend with fun things with DS and DH. At least it's the weekend!

scaredmummy2B Sat 13-Oct-12 13:00:29

He said he would but all I seem to have done this year is sit in my room and sulk about a mc so trying to keep busy and not do that but not feeling it so will prob go home in a bit and he'll stay here (the inlaws) with the kids

YorkshirePeanut Sat 13-Oct-12 14:06:30

Aw scared, big hugs. Sometimes it just seems so bloody unfair doesn't it? The hospital being rubbish won't have helped, but maybe it's better you're being ignored at home than being ignored on an unfriendly ward. If you carry on feeling rubbish have you got an EPU you can go to?

lol sorry managed to totally ignore your last post! I haven't got any children yet, which is maybe why I'm struggling so much, and I'm 30, so not quite old enough for anyone except me to panic! How about you? We also got pregnant the second the implant was taken out, I think it took one swift bonk and that was that, job done - so I assumed we were uber-fertile and getting pregnant again would be easy-peasy. Not the case sad...

MunchinMango Sat 13-Oct-12 16:05:09

Happy birthday baby. Have a glass or three vino and cheers to a brighter future.

Scared so sorry to read your news. It's hard to believe it has happened again and the hospitals treatment is a disgrace. Hope you get some rest and cry it out if it helps.

Welcome Quinn, And when totally agree with your list of what not to say!!!

Fx peanut af on her way.

I was due af on wed but still no sign and a bfn this morning. Would just love if af showed up so we could try again!!!

It's been a very sad time on this thread. Hope Mother Nature is kinder to us all very soon.

scaredmummy2B Sat 13-Oct-12 16:05:21

That was the epu peanut not much faith at all least I can rest in my own home but I just feel so sick and dizzy and like no one cares !

Trying not to just sit in the corner and cry but its getting very tempting

messtins Sat 13-Oct-12 16:25:49

Happy birthday babyjames !

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Sat 13-Oct-12 19:15:57

scared so sorry this is all so awful for you. Big hug being sent your way (don't usually hand out hugs but you need one).

YorkshirePeanut Sun 14-Oct-12 08:46:51

Happy birthday for yesterday baby! Here's to a happier year ahead xxx

Lolcbcblemonlime Sun 14-Oct-12 09:29:12

Hope everyone feeling a bit more positive today.
Scared how's things??
Peanut I'm 38!!! Was on the pill until about 18 months ago but was not actively trying until I had the mc! Now have become obsessed keen to have a baby!

YorkshirePeanut Sun 14-Oct-12 17:58:44

lol 38, still spring chicken territory! I was totally chilled out about trying until we had the mc. Was expecting it to take ages so getting a bullseye first time was a bit of a shock, but since the mc I'm somewhat rabid about getting pg again. I reckon this month is going to be a good one for both of us! Am using the power of positive thinking! and not at all sceptical about said power of positive thinking

In other news, thought AF had arrived this morning - all signs were looking good, a bit crampy, spotting getting more obvious...back to nothing at all this PM. AAAAAAARGH. So am painting our bedroom to take my mind off crazy body. Hopefully it will become a seductive boudoir and therefore more conducive to babymaking! (unlikely given my painting skills)...

Lolcbcblemonlime Sun 14-Oct-12 19:12:51

Bugger peanut. Maybe not af? Is it just spotting?

Quinandthem Sun 14-Oct-12 19:24:46

i dont know all your stories since i've only just joined but it seems like we've all been through a lot - especially you Scared.

taking a positive from not being pregnant - it meant that i could drink at my sister-in-laws wedding last night - a day with my OH's family could turn anyone to drink. it also meant we had a dirty weekend in a B&B which was nice to put the passion back into sex rather than it all being about baby making.

Also - we're on the 2 week wait for AF and i'm always confused about drinking in this time - i dont normally drink alot anyway. what do you do?

scaredmummy2B Mon 15-Oct-12 07:45:39

lol still in a lot of pain bleeding has eased not many clots just want Friday to come now its been e very emotional weekend and now my man is working all day today and tomorrow so think its all gonna hit me hard being on my own I try to avoid it normally today I can't but tomorrow my friend is coming around to rescue me for a couple hours at least! I can't go far still in pain and bleeding! Feel like this is the only support I got and don't feel like I should be here coz I'm def not ttc just moaning after mc 3 of the bastards idiots :-(

Lolcbcblemonlime Mon 15-Oct-12 09:23:58

Don't ever feel you don't belong here. We are all miserable at times! It will get better but you need time x

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Mon 15-Oct-12 09:24:10

Hi scared really sorry you are still in do much pain and not getting enough support. Hope it gets better soon.

YorkshirePeanut Mon 15-Oct-12 09:36:37

Morning one and all - it's a new week, let's hope it's going to be a good one!

Quin I think as long as you keep it to a reasonable amount - a glass of vino or two every so often - you're not going to do any damage. I managed to beat myself up after the MC because I'd had a few glasses before we found out I was pg, but I know that was illogical (didn't stop me doing it!). Dirty weekend sounds amazing, if only I could persuade the DH and the bank manager that it's a good idea for us too!

munchin any sign of AF? Could you have ovulated late and therefore tested too early?

lol god only knows - spotting, AF, some other freakish hormonal trickery? Brown spotting back again this morning, but for how long I wonder..definitely not a normal period anyway. I've got a doctor's appointment on Fri so if it's still going by then I'll go and have a whinge at them.

scared glad you've got a friend coming round, you need support right now. You're welcome here as long as you want to be!

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 15-Oct-12 09:38:09

Fab name change Hopeful
You are always welcome here Scarred . Glad you have a supportive friend coming round 2mor. I was told if the pain continued when the bleeding stopped then to see a Doctor. Hope the physical pain at least stops soon.

Thanks for all you Birthday wishes. Enjoyed the weekend with DH and DS but yesterday was hard as went for lunch with my best friend and she is 7 weeks pregnant and I was just a few weeks behind her. Felt really envy of her feeling sick ind generally the unfairness of it all. Her baby will always be a reminder of what I have lost. Hope it's my turn for a sticky one next!

Welcome Quin . Sorry you find yourself on this thread. I have found a lot of support here from people who understand.

Can't remember who said they have been decorating blush Think I fancy doing my bedroom too. May make a start today clearing out some junk for the charity shop.

MissMedusa Mon 15-Oct-12 10:36:48

quin drinking will make no difference whatsoever before implantation and it shouldn't affect development either until at least week 5 when the fetal pole starts developing. I wouldn't go ott as it's not healthy anyway but a few glasses and a little buzz won't make any difference in the early days. In the beginning of my TTC days I would avoid alcohol and live as if PG during the 2ww but after several months I stopped that as it makes no difference anyway and it was just adding to the mentalling. Now I make no changes other than to try to lead a healthy lifestyle in general to boost my fertility.

Regarding people saying inappropriate things, I found this blog which is quite funny:

thingspeoplesaidaftermymiscarriage.blogspot.com

messtins Mon 15-Oct-12 13:25:31

I agree about the drinking. We've been TTC for 15m now, that's a long time to be teetotal. I wouldn't get bladdered either, but I don't think a glass of wine is going to do any harm.

scared hope you are coping ok today. Of course you are welcome here whether you are TTC again or not. We all need people who understand.

scaredmummy2B Mon 15-Oct-12 17:12:30

I'm so not coping today I live in wales but from London all my best mates are there I have no one here I feel so down and alone my only friend is my boss that also just served me a dissaplinary letter for being off sick so angry and so very alone dh sorted it all rang hr said we are taking legal action coz this is the last thing I need on top of waiting for my appt Fri to see if we have just lost our 3rd baby in 10 months sorry for ranting I have nothing else

MunchinMango Mon 15-Oct-12 20:16:17

Like the name change when!! We all could do with a shot of hope.

Baby I'd say that was so hard seeing your friend. Agree bet cure is to get pg ASAP!!! If only it were that simple. Glad your birthday went ok

I agree with messtins and medusa on having a few glasses vino while ttc.

Peanut sorry af is still teasing you and not fully arrived yet. I have still had no af either and on cd 34 now. I defo not pg. we haven't dtd enough. I don't know should I start back using opk? I'm at a loss what to do.

Scared I'm so sorry you've had a really crap day. I can't believe your boss and they are supposed to be a friend??? Bravo to your dh!!! I don't know the law in uk but I'm sure it must be on your side and they will have to pull their horns in. Things must seem very bleak at moment but keep talking whether it be here or on phone to friends. Don't bottle it up.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 15-Oct-12 21:58:44

Today, Monday 15 October, marks International Babyloss Awareness Day, a time to remember and mark the brief lives of babies who died in pregnancy, at birth or in infancy. thanks
Tonight at 7.00pm I light 2 candles in memory of all the angel babies and as a sign of hope for us all.
'Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith; it is the price of love'

janiewoozle Mon 15-Oct-12 22:04:25

hi girls,

haven't been on here in a while, just lingering in the background a bit. scared i'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. it really is the toughest of times. i honestly didn't know sadness like it - i've felt emotions i've never felt before. I hope you can get through this horrible time.

i managed to go back into work today (had d&c on 4th october) and it was hard but i'm glad to get back into a routine even though being off has made me realise how much i hate my job. my doc offered me another weeks sickline but i couldn't afford it and i think i was finally close to being ready to face the world again.

but thankfully the bleeding seems to have finished so i'm thinking it's time to get back on the DTD band wagon! AF was always a 50 day cycle since i came off the pill so lord knows how long she will take to reappear this time sad but got some cheapo ovulation tests off ebay that seemed to do the trick last time so fingers crossed it doesn't take too long

xx

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 15-Oct-12 22:05:40

Scared I agree with Mango that it's not good to bottle things up. Sorry you are feeling alone.
I'l third the not totally giving up drinking. I cut loads of things out over the last few months and still lost 2 pregnancies. A few glasses of wine arn't going to make a difference in my opinion.
I liked that blog Medusa kept me entertained a while earlier.
Mango have just ordered myself another box of OPK's. Clear Blue are going to break my bank!!!

YorkshirePeanut Mon 15-Oct-12 22:47:28

hopeful I'm sorry I don't know this - but who were you before you were hopeful??

baby never heard of pregnancy and infant loss day but it's a lovely idea. I've lit my candles. A bit late, but it's got to be 7 o'clock somewhere in the world! A few tears shed, but still holding out hope for the future smile x

munchin AF is a total b***h! I still don't know if she's arrived or not, one minute I'm sure she must have and the next, nothing again! Annoying... It's more than just spotting when it happens but not enough to be a definitive period. Hope yours turns up soon. Flipping WTF cycle - in some ways, I hate it more than the miscarriage itself, it's just keeping the whole horrible experience dragging on. I'm undecided about the OPKs, they didn't pick up when I ov'd last time but I think I might get some anyway, because now I'm not sure whether this counts as the start of a new cycle or just some annoying spotting in the middle of the same one. Gaaah.

janie good luck with the baby-making smile

scared I didn't realise they'd sent you home without a definitive answer. I'm really shocked they'd do that, no wonder you're in pieces. Can you get your DH to phone the EPU again and ask them to move the appointment forward? In the nicest possible way you don't seem to be coping all that well, and I'm sure the uncertainty isn't helping, you just need to know. Perhaps if he can convey how upset you are they'd see you more urgently. I hope your friend can help lift your mood a little tomorrow xxx

medusa thanks for the blog, not easy to find anything that treats miscarriage with a bit of humour and I think you need that sometimes!

Right, off to bed, up at 5 for a nice 12 hour shift on antenatal ward. Sigh.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Mon 15-Oct-12 23:10:33

Hi peanut I am WhenSheWasBadSheWadFeelingHorrid (or WhenSheWasBadSheWadAnOrange).

Glad you like the name change baby and munchin definitely needed something more positive than Horrid.

scared I am so angry at your work. They can't count pregnancy related sickness against you (and that includes mc). It's discrimination and you have a really strong case. I am absolutely fuming on your behalf, best of luck with the legal action.

Well I had my consultant appointment today for recurrent mc / chem pregs. It was actually the junior doctor who saw he. To be honest I don't really think he knew his stuff and just wanted to sign me up for a trial to see if progesterone reduces the risk of mc.
He will run a load of tests on me and dh but says as we have bad dd be thinks they will all come back normal.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 16-Oct-12 08:47:04

Welcome back Janie . Also about to start DTD again and hoping for a sticky one this time. My cycle was also very long and ovulated very late last month. Now had 2 MC in a row so hoping for 3rd time lucky. I'm also with you on hating my job!
Gosh Peanut that's a long shift! Glad you also light your candle. I saw it on the Miscarriage Association website.
Hopeful I am also waiting for an appointment with the local hospital as had 2 MC and 1 chemical this year. I have read positive stories about taking Progesterone. What are your thoughts about it. Do you know what tests you will have. I have been researching but it seems to vary wildly depending on consultant! Oh for the simple life hey!
Scared hope your friend still visits and she can give you a bit of RL support.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 16-Oct-12 08:47:39

Have we heard from KittyKats for a while?

MissMedusa Tue 16-Oct-12 09:32:30

hopeful I was on progesterone supplements (mine was at 11) but it obviously didn't help me. Apparently it only really helps when a miscarriage is due solely to low progesterone. Low progesterone can impair implantation. Still, if there's a chance it can save a mc, I'd use it again.

scaredmummy2B Tue 16-Oct-12 09:57:26

Janie its good your moving on and feeling stronger going back to work really helped me last time but its always hard after a lot of time off I'm kinda envious this stage is so awful if I need another d &c I want to just get on with it and move on like yourself keep strong it does get easier thats why I'm kicking myself I was really getting there after the last two now I'm back to square one again :-/

babyJames I am not bottling things up as much as before I talk to my partner but no one else at the mo last time I shut him out too so thats progress! Its harder at the mo as my mums very poorly and was my sisters birthday yesterday so don't wanna bother them! Dh2b is being amazine this time though and he's taken it real hard too!

peanut your right I'm not boring great and it is the waiting in my heart I know its gone but we have to Walt to have a re scan a week later because its could be too early to see heartbeat so they always say come back a week later last time we had the same thing but for 4 weeks it was agony! They won't do anything different these useless anyway!

hopeful my partner went off his head they have agreed to apologize in person on paper and write a letter confirming all my sick days are written off and my disaplinary has been scrapped and I've been given a clean slate and as much time as I need as I rang all the human rights helpline's and they are breaking equality laws and code of practice could have wiped the slate clean with them but I love my job so I'm happy with an apology just didn't need to have to deal with all that got enough on my plate :-(

MissMedusa Tue 16-Oct-12 10:27:08

scared here's to supportive partners! Mine really saved me and this would have been a much different experience without his help. What made it so surprising is that he isn't like that, he's very rational and doesn't really understand emotions. My tears are usually met with indifference but he really pulled it out for me during this time and I'm absolutely amazed at how supportive and understanding he has been, it has blown me away. We have been through a lot together recently, some of which has pulled us apart but this has definitely brought us together, closer than ever. I don't know how I would have done it without him.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Tue 16-Oct-12 11:39:41

scared I'm so glad the work issue has been resolved. Hope you start to feel better soon.

missMedusa thanks for the info. So sorry about your mc at 11, that must have been horrendous. I lose them really early (chem pregs). So maybe extra progesterone would help implantation?

baby my tests are, thrombophilia screening, anti cardiolipin antibodies, anti phospholipid antibodies and lupus anticoagulant.
Also dh and I are having our genes checked to see if we are incompatible and any fetus produced would have chromosomal abnormalities (dd seems healthy so hopefully there is no problem there).

I think the other tests are to see if my blood is clotting too much and causing the placenta to fail or if my body is attacking the embryo.

suzydelarosa Tue 16-Oct-12 12:49:15

hi Whenshewas... so interesting to hear about your tests... please could you let us know how you get on? Were any of them invasive and/or how do they check? Are they all bloodtests? I have an appointment at the recurrent miscarriage clinic on the 25th October. Pretty sure they'll just say that my eggs are too old!

scared - what a nightmare for work. Like you need the stress on top of everything else. Some managers really need to get up to speed on the basic legal issues around employment.

I've not been posting for a while as all the BFNs and trying is making me just plain sad! I forgot to turn off a few of my pregnancy apps and got a notice today that i'm now on my 19th week of pregnancy. Ummmm... waaaahh! I am DTD this week and weekend hopfully ovulating on Monday. Really hoping I can get my 42 year old egg to conceive this week before I turn 43!!

MissMedusa Tue 16-Oct-12 13:07:30

hopeful sorry, I meant that my progesterone levels were at 11 which is very low. I had my D&C at 7 weeks. It may well help you if you MC early as it helps with implantation. I'm not sure if it would help if your progesterone levels are normal but it's worth looking into. Have you had your progesterone levels checked?

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 16-Oct-12 13:23:56

My DH was also amazingly good with my mc. I did not expect that. He even missed a concert he had been planning for ages just to stay at home and cuddle me. I was gobsmacked!

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 16-Oct-12 14:03:00

I hope I will get my Progesterone levels checked too. My losses are also all early so would be good to know if that was the reason.
Hi there Suzy I did something similar with the pregnancy apps (twice!). Big hug for you. Think we maybe cycle buddies this month. Should be due to ovulate Monday unless I get another messed up cycle! FX for us this time.
Thanks for the testing info Hopeful I hope they find some answers for you.
What tests are you having next Medusa ? Hope you also find some answers.
Scared glad that work has been sorted out at least for you. Sorry to hear your Mum is unwell too. Hope you have been able to meet with your friend today.
So lovely to hear of everyone's supportive partners smile

suzydelarosa Tue 16-Oct-12 14:24:16

babyjames I think i remember you from the TTC in March thread. Back then life was sweet and I was only one m/c in!! good luck with the TTC this month.

I had a dream last night where I was older and my two daughters were coming to visit me which i think is a good omen. C'mon DD#2!!

MunchinMango Tue 16-Oct-12 16:49:49

I agree here here to supportive partners.

Scared, I'm glad dh sorted your work out. At least that's one worry out of the way. Thinking of you for Friday.

Baby thats a lovely quote re grief, yes it was baby loss day yest.
I too am a very good customer of clear blue lol!!!

When you are certainly having very comprehensive tests by sounds of it. Fx yous get an answer.

Peanut ditto to AF!!! That must be so hard working on an antenatal ward and a 12 hour shift to boot.

Janie glad to hear you are coming out the other side. That is crap having such long cycles.

Suzy I hear you loud and clear , I feel too its the egg quality is the issue for us coupled with very irregular AF. That's why I have put off Hou g to doc as I don't think there is much to be done. But chin up maybe it will happen yet.

I decided maybe it might be idea to start temping. I have a first response monitor I used when ttc dc1 so I fetched it out of back of wardrobe. I know it can't make me pg but I feel like I am trying something.

messtins Wed 17-Oct-12 08:03:37

Well I would have said my DH was immensely practically supportive at the time but can't get his head around the emotional side of things at all, but he has gone and booked a builder to come round to talk about our new kitchen diner which I've been waiting 2.5yrs for. I think this is his way of doing something positive and having something to look forward to. I'll take what I can get wink

messtins Wed 17-Oct-12 08:10:47

Medusa thanks for posting that blog - I really liked some of the memorial ideas on there. Pity we can't send a general link to the what to say and what not to say to everyone we know!

scared hope you are ok today and that your friend was supportive yesterday.

baby thanks for the reminder about baby loss day. Sadly I know too many people in real life and in cyberspace who will have been lighting candles. I like your quote too.

suzy hope your dream turns out to be prophetic. I'm here hoping my last 37yr old egg is a good'un so know how you feel. I know in my heart a month can't make much difference but it sounds better.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Wed 17-Oct-12 10:47:33

Hi suzy the tests are just blood tests. I haven't had them taken yet as I need to get dh down to the path lab as well (he is away at the moment). Best of luck at your appointment, I hope your dr is more knowledgable than mine. He was a junior who just wanted to get the tests booked and sign me up for a trial.
I have an app booked for 6 weeks time to review the results.

missmedusa I had a day 21 progesterone test. Levels were 56 (I think, definitely in the 50s though). That seems ok. My gut feeling is my progesterone levels aren't the issue because I only start bleeding days after the pregnancy tests have gone negative.

Gingerpanther27 Wed 17-Oct-12 15:29:20

Hi can I join please on tww after mc last month really hoping to get BFP again

Lolcbcblemonlime Wed 17-Oct-12 17:33:18

Welcome ginger. Sorry about mc. Have u any kids? Hope u feeling ok. You seem positive enough!

scaredmummy2B Wed 17-Oct-12 17:46:41

Welcome ginger

littlepinkfizz Wed 17-Oct-12 19:13:37

Hi ginger sorry to hear about your mc. We are all in the same boat here so you will have plenty of support. grin

woody17 Wed 17-Oct-12 22:29:57

Hi everyone - have just been catching up on the thread since I got back from Rome last night. Had a lovely time - I absolutely love the city.

So, I am CD26. Still have almost constant nausea (apart from when I eat) and very sore, tender boobs. The tenderness has now spread from being almost under my arms to my entire boobs. They hurt all the time and are tender to the touch. The only time that they have been like this before is when I was pg the first time. I have tested by only had a BFN. Hoping it's just too early. I'm going to test on Saturday but as this is a wtf cycle, who knows what's going to happen. I have allowed myself to completely get my hopes up and I'm not sure how I'm going to take it if I don't get a BFP.

yorkshirepeanut are you going to continue with the acupuncture? I had another session today - I always feel really positive after it. I totally agree with your hatred of the phrase - "at least you know you can get pregnant". I also hate "just relax and it'll happen" and "it'll be worth the wait when it happens".

babyjames I thought that my dad (who's a dr) would be sceptical about the acupuncture but he wasn't at all - he was saying that in China, people have operations just using acupuncture for pain relief etc.

kittykat hope you're having a brilliant time in Egypt!

Sorry that af arrived posy

Hope you are doing ok scared

Hello quinandthem it's hard all the waiting, especially when it feels like everyone around us is getting pg. I think that it's after 3 mcs that the dr will refer you for tests. I try to really cut back in the 2ww - a nutritionist advised 1-2 glasses of good wine a week, preferably with food.

Hi janie - sorry that you've had to go through all of this.

when that's disappointing that the junior dr didn't seem to know his stuff. Hope that you get the test results back soon.

Fingers crossed that you get a BFP soon suzy

Hello gingerpanther - sorry that you've had to join us on here but it is a really nice and supportive thread. Hope that the 2ww goes by quickly for you.

YorkshirePeanut Wed 17-Oct-12 22:47:25

Hi girls. Been a hard/strange couple of days this end. I rotated this week from postnatal ward to antenatal. I thought it would be easier than being on postnatal, but I've really struggled. A lady phoned up today while I was working on MAC (maternity assessment centre) at 12 weeks, with cramps and bleeding. It beyond broke my heart that I couldn't even help her (we don't take anyone under 14 weeks at that unit) and I had to send her elsewhere, I could hear how much she was trying not to cry on the phone and couldn't help remembering me doing exactly the same thing. Hung up and then fell apart a bit, which was hard because nobody at work knows about the mc so I got some funny looks. I hope this gets easier sad.

On the plus side, I think I'm sure AF has finally arrived. It's still not as heavy as a normal period, but it's a period. Have reset my eggtimer and am now CD2 I think, roll on shag week! Fx for a normal cycle length this time round....I'm feeling hopeful of a BFP for Christmas hope you're listening Santa

ginger welcome, sorry about your mc. Hope your 2ww is fruitful!

woody17 Wed 17-Oct-12 22:49:55

yorkshirepeanut that must have been really hard, especially as you can really empathise.

I'm not glad that af has arrived for you but glad that you know where you are in your cycle. Fx for Christmas BFPs!

YorkshirePeanut Wed 17-Oct-12 23:16:02

Hi woody crossed posts with you! Rome-envious in a big way, glad you had a fab time. Am crossing all that is crossable for a bfp for you soon! Yep, going back to see acupuncturist tomorrow. Af arrived a few days after she prodded me last time, so lets see what she can do about stimulating ovulation! I'm so sceptical normally, but currently I would drink moonbeams and dance naked in the woods at midnight if I thought it would help with conception... grin

Gingerpanther27 Thu 18-Oct-12 00:13:07

Thanks for the warm welcome everyone smile it was mc #3 sad but now actually ttc (well more than we were blush lol ) smile after the unplanned bumps now much better situation to ttc and after discussing it with OH for and in answer to your question lol no kids yet

messtins Thu 18-Oct-12 08:08:38

Hi Ginger and welcome.

Yorkshire it must be really hard dealing with pregnant ladies at the moment, especially if they are going through problems (though maybe that's better than having to deal with the ones sailing through without a care in the world?). I'm sure your ability to empathise helped that woman - hope she is ok.
Yay for AF at last and CD1 and a new start though!

We'll all put a BFP top of our Christmas list - FC, get your act together... grin

Lolcbcblemonlime Thu 18-Oct-12 09:45:01

Is there any poas on the horizon for us ladies?
Woody think you are next!

woody17 Thu 18-Oct-12 10:54:32

Yes, I was going to test Saturday/Sunday but I've been using this pregnancy test timing calculator

www.countdowntopregnancy.com/tools/pregnancy_test_calculator.php

This says that I'm not due until Monday. When I put in the dates of my two other pregnancies, it fits with those and when I was getting BFNs and BFPs so I might wait until Monday now.

I agree with you YorkshirePeanut - I'm willing to try anything!

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Thu 18-Oct-12 10:56:30

I'm testing Monday too. (If af stays away).

Are you still getting symptoms Woody. I feel really sick but I think I just have dds stomach bug. sad

woody17 Thu 18-Oct-12 11:11:41

Yes when feeling really sick - think it's getting worse and my boobs are tender all over - they are so painful when I touch them and kind of ache all the time as well. This has been spreading.

FX for both of us on Monday!

janiewoozle Thu 18-Oct-12 11:30:41

yorkshire that would be tough on the heart strings. i've had 2 people telling me they're pg since i came back to work on monday and that's been tough enough. how long did you wait after MC to go for the accupuncture? i am really tempted to give it a shot and i found a place just near my house where they do it and specialise in ladies cycles / fertility issues etc. i had my d&c a fortnight ago and i've stopped bleeding but with my cycles before MC being 50 days, i know this one could be longer so wondering if it might help speed it up a little bit.

very excited to hear about the POAS ladies!! got everything crossed for you!! xx

woody17 Thu 18-Oct-12 11:33:50

janie I had acupuncture less than a week after I started bleeding with my last mc.

janiewoozle Thu 18-Oct-12 11:46:06

thanks yorkshire i wasn't really sure if it would be too soon but i think i'll try to get booked in for next week. i'll try anything!

woollywomble Thu 18-Oct-12 12:11:36

Hi everyone, thought I'd pop in after posting on the miscarriage board (waves at Messtins) and thought I'd ask here too. Had a mc on 26 Sep and am now waiting for cycle to return to normal. My dilemma is whether to ttc before AF returns or wait until one normal cycle. I am 41 so time is of the essence but am prepared to wait if this increases the likelihood of a successful pg. Is your body physically ready to conceive again so quickly after a mc? Does anyone have any experience of this? Of course, this might all be hypothetical anyway, assuming that I get a BFP again...

suzydelarosa Thu 18-Oct-12 12:21:34

Hi Wolly - I have two friends who got pg right after their mc. It really depends on how along you were when you miscarried. if it was a chemical pregnancy and you were, say, only 5 weeks along then I'd imagine you'd be good to go asap....whereas if you were much further along and closer to 12 weeks, I imagine it would take a while to get ovulation starting again (your hormones sometimes take a while to drop back down to normal) and maybe the body does need a break.

I always figure - why not give it a shot!? (that's me at 42 talking... desperate times and all that!)

suzydelarosa Thu 18-Oct-12 12:22:38

sorry, I mean wooly....

woollywomble Thu 18-Oct-12 12:29:02

Thanks suzy, I was almost 11 weeks. I think DH will put his foot down if we mc again and want to call it a day, so I desperately want it to work next time (as does everyone in this situation I know!) as this will probably be our last attempt.

YorkshirePeanut Thu 18-Oct-12 13:59:54

janie I went to try and sort my cycle out, it was CD75 (about) when I finally went for acupuncture, after having been ignored by the doctor. That was a week ago, AF arrive a couple of days after seeing her. It could be coincidence of course, but I'm going to see her again today and will see if she can now do something to improve chances of ovulating and successful implantation. Irritatingly with acupuncture, you never know if it really worked, only if it doesn't work! I don't think there's a right time to start having it, if I'd known I were likely to have such a crazy WTF cycle I would have gone sooner. Poor you having all those announcements - I can deal at work because it's work, but friends' pregnancies are a totally different kettle of fish! My friend is coming round for coffee this pm, we were 3 weeks apart and she's now 24 weeks pregnant. Going to be hard to see her bump, but she's had her own bad times, she had a stillbirth at term two years ago and a healthy baby since so I guess it's karmic swings and roundabouts...

messtins it's actually easier dealing with the nice normal pregnancies, they give me hope for what could be! Especially when you see in their notes that they've had previous losses but gone on to have a normal pregnancy. The only ones that get me down are the ones who've never had anything but healthy pregnancies and babies, moaning about indigestion or stretchmarks or just being sick of being pregnant. I know I should be professional, but I just want to tell them to shut up and be bloody well grateful!! (I don't. But I would like to grin)..

woolly I think I posted something on the last thread about this, but there's no evidence that outcomes are worse if you ttc straight away as long as you've been on folic acid at least 3 months - I looked into it very thoroughly! WHO and NHS guidelines (to wait 3 months) are based on absolutely nothing other than them wanting you to have a regular cycle so they can date the pregnancy easily. Go for it!

woody17 Thu 18-Oct-12 14:03:23

Hi wooly sorry that you've had to join us here but it is a lovely thread and I think it helps having someone to talk to who has been through similar experiences.

I've been pg twice and mc both times. I had first mc in July and fell pregnant again in September with an af in between. We've ttc immediately after both mcs, once the bleeding has stopped. It just felt like the right thing to do. EPU and Dr said we could start again right away. There is also a study that has shown that if you get pg again in first 6 months after a mc, you are less likely to mc again.

messtins Thu 18-Oct-12 14:23:04

smile waves at Wooly

IBelieveInPink Thu 18-Oct-12 16:13:10

Hi all. Looks like I will be joining you soon. Am currently in the middle of a mc, and as it my first one, not sure how long it will take etc. but we want to TTC as soon as possible.
<waves at a few names I remember from conception thread>
Wow this baby making business is hard isn't it.
I may lurk for a little bit until I'm ready to be brave again, but just wanted to say hi.

woody17 Thu 18-Oct-12 16:27:45

Hi Ibelieveinpink - really sorry that you've had to join us. Hope you are getting support in RL. I've found that this thread has really helped me - most people that I know in RL have never had a mc and it's helped to have people to talk to on here who understand.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Thu 18-Oct-12 17:01:26

pink I think I remember you from the conception threads. So very very sorry. Look after yourself.

Lolcbcblemonlime Thu 18-Oct-12 17:32:42

Oh no pink I remember you too. Sorry u find yourself here hun. We are a lovely bunch though.

YorkshirePeanut Thu 18-Oct-12 19:04:30

Hi pink, so sorry you've ended up here. Lurk away, post when you're ready - venting is good! Treat yourself gently xxx

IBelieveInPink Thu 18-Oct-12 19:30:37

Thanks all. I will be sure to join in as soon as I can. Really appreciate your kind words. Times like this you realise how lovely people can be.

messtins Thu 18-Oct-12 19:50:15

Hi Pink I'm sorry you are joining us sad , not a club anyone wants to be in, but we are here whenever you are ready to try again.

littlepinkfizz Thu 18-Oct-12 21:19:05

Hi fellowpink ,yes I recognise you too from another thread. You will find plenty of support and hugs here. Take it easy and lurk away wink

AlmondFrangipani Thu 18-Oct-12 21:44:28

Hi Girls!

Sorry I havent been around much. Was getting a bit obsessed with MN so thought I better ween myself off a bit. Hoping I have missed some BFP's??

Sorry to the newbies who have joined.

So my last cycle was completely messed up! Ovd on CD17 then got my AF on CD 25 which only lasted 2.5 days which was very short for me (they used to be 6 days) and was v light. Had a freak out as I realised I had a 9 day luteal phase which I read (Dr Google) makes it hard to get/stay pregnant. Been trying to be more positive this cycle - on CD14 now. We've been DTD regularly (almost EOD) since CD9. Not had any smile so looks like it may be another WTF cycle. How many of these can I have??!!

Woody fingers crossed for you poas!
Yorkshire glad the acupuncture worked!! I had been having it for my migraines and it seems to be helping! My physio (who does the acupuncture) has inadvertently become my counsellor as I had to sign a form that said 'are you actively trying for a baby'. So then blurted out all about the mc and now it seems like every week we talk about it or something related! Random but seems to be helping.
Lol how are you? Where are you in your cycle?

janiewoozle Thu 18-Oct-12 22:02:23

thanks yorkshire i heard back from the acupuncturist and she advised she could bring me in for a chat and see how it goes - although she recommends once a week x 4 weeks, then once every other week then once a month which sounds pricey. hope tomorrow goes well with your friend. my best friend is 22 weeks pg and i know she was having her 20 week scan around about when i had my D&C and i just realised that she probably didn't want to tell me about it. it is tough on both sides i guess. but if the friendship is strong then you know that each other will be there for each other through everything - good and bad.

unfortunately, in the meantime i heard back from the hospital where i had my d&c. i opted to have the cells tested after the op as this can give any results of problems etc. and they have told me it was a Molar pregnancy - simply explained as similar to a mole on the skin but in the uterus. they advise that its extremely dangerous to TTC for at least a year as they have to continually test to ensure that all traces of the last pg and cells have gone sad i've been in such a state since as i have my heart set on TTC again as soon as i get a positive on my ovulation tests sad i live in belfast but have to register with a hospital in london as it's quite rare and there's a 20% that chemotherapy would be required as treatment. i'm totally devasted and now panicking that it will take longer and things might never happen

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Thu 18-Oct-12 23:08:40

janie I'm so sorry about the molar pregnancy. A friend had this a few years back it is very treatable but horrible to give up a year of ttc.

Really sorry

janiewoozle Fri 19-Oct-12 07:51:32

thanks whenshewasbad

i haven't slept a wink. we were heading away for a hotel break this weekend as a little treat after the MC and i was feeling really positive but now i'm just in a total state of despair. emotional rollercoaster doesn't come close.

Lolcbcblemonlime Fri 19-Oct-12 07:51:49

Hi almond!
Long time no see!
I'm ok. Was really down when af arrived last month and felt very sorry for myself but have now picked up the pieces.
I'm on 8 dpo trying and failing not to get my hopes up too much this month. I've decided not to test until I'm late, if I get to that point, to avoid heartache. So I might test Sunday morning or even Monday.
Where are you on yours? How are you feeling?

messtins Fri 19-Oct-12 08:02:45

janie I'm so sorry about the molar pregnancy. I know a few people from MC boards who have been through this and it has turned out ok for all of them, but prolonging the tests and worry and delaying TTC again is just awful. I hope you are still able to enjoy your weekend, but can understand this has just knocked the stuffing out of you again sad

janiewoozle Fri 19-Oct-12 08:37:07

Thank you messtins you're right, the stuffing has been totally knocked out of me. I'm normally a really positive person but I just can't bring myself to be that way. God knows how I'll get through work today sad where's the fast forward button in life when you need it x

YorkshirePeanut Fri 19-Oct-12 08:41:51

Oh janie that sucks. On the one hand thank goodness you did get the test done, but totally get that you just want to try again. So unfair. When will they let you know if it was complete or partial? I really hope no chemo is needed. I had a quick google (as you do) and nhs website says if no chemo needed then you can try to conceive again once your hcg levels are back to 0 which could be as soon as 2 months. Not trying to second guess your consultant but don't give up hope!

janiewoozle Fri 19-Oct-12 09:18:51

thanks yorkshire i know i'm glad i opted to have the test done after the op - at least i know. i'm dreading getting the call from the team at the hospital so i am making a little list of questions i should ask them in case i get all flustered and sad. i'm trying to stay positive but it's just been such an up and down couple of months.

i think i need to have something to look forward to / take my mind off it - hate my job so i think if i can try to look for new work then at least my mind might concentrate on something else for a while. and holiday...a really good long holiday. To make it worse, my boss (who is well aware of MC etc.) came in this morning and his daughter was caught on being drunk at the weekend (she's nearly 17) and he started saying 'i'll tell you one reason you don't want kids....' i just thought it was the most insensitive thing ever. aaaaaaaarrrrgggghhhhh!!!!

sorry rant over x

woody17 Fri 19-Oct-12 09:51:22

Hi almond - good to hear from you. The wtf cycles are so frustrating. I've recently started having acupuncture - I feel like it's helping me.

Hope you are ok janie. I think you are right about the strength of the friendship though. I'm really sorry to hear about the molar pregnancy and having to wait to ttc. I hope you are getting lots of support in RL. Your boss sounds very insensitive. I wonder if it might help having some kind of adventure booked - is there something that you've always wanted to do that you wouldn't be able to if you were pregnant or perhaps with small children? Trek the Inca Trail? Scuba dive on the Great Barrier Reef? Climb Kilimanjaro? It's totally different but I had about a month in Australia about a month after my first mc - we'd booked if before I fell pg but it definitely helped me come to terms with what had happened.

Well, I'm still feeling nauseous (think it's getting worse), really tired and boobs are still sore and tender all over and aching/throbbing. Going to poas on Sunday/Monday. Looking back, I never get a BFP early - it's always at least on the day that af is due so for once, I'm not going to waste money doing it any earlier!

lol sounds like we might be poas together!

janiewoozle Fri 19-Oct-12 10:06:14

thanks woody you must know me well! i'm thinking work here for another few months, save like hell and then go on an adventure. come back, settle down and hopefully things might go our way. my boss actually just pulled me in to the meeting room just now and apologised as he could see i was already upset. i told him about the test results and had a bit of a breakdown. he told me to head out for an hour and get a coffee or go for a walk just or see if i can get an appointment with the doc to talk it over but i'm just going to battle on through as if i go out now i might never come back!

i'm so excited for you POAS! you better all get BFPs to get me through this!!!! fingers crossed for you all - i want to hear lots of news of sore boobs and morning sickness please!! in the meantime, i will be drinking copious bottles of red wine and eating rare steaks and goats cheese on your behalf for a year! xx

AlmondFrangipani Fri 19-Oct-12 10:07:30

Janie very sorry to hear about the Molar pg. Fingers crossed Yorkshire is right. I have been trying to take a similar attitude about sorting out a few other things in my life (sounds like we have the same boss wink). Applying for a uni course and getting a new house. Holidays may be on the back burner for awhile though!

Lol I really hope this is your month!! I am on CD15 now. No smiley on the opk yet (can you miss them?) but had quite a lot of watery CM. I am hoping that I ov soon and that my luteal phase is a bit longer than last month! It was a bit of a shock getting my period so early (especially as I bought 200 not quiet but you know what I mean pg tests ready for poas!).

Woody glad the acupuncture is helping. I think I may try some more as I really liked the little bit I have had. Fx for you too!

janiewoozle Fri 19-Oct-12 11:26:50

almond yes sometimes bosses are great and sometimes they are monsters. i think the guilt set in with mine and he just gave me an envelope with 40 euros in it and told me to get some nice wine with my dinner while we away on our hotel break this weekend. so maybe not all bad. but i still want to leave!

thanks for all your kind messages girls, i don't know how i would get through this morning without MN! it's one of those things that you just can't talk to everyone about so this is a lifesaver / sanity saver right now!

MunchinMango Fri 19-Oct-12 17:17:36

So sorry Jainie to hear about your molar pg. I'm sure you'd just like to draw a line under the whole mc and move on and this latest news isn't letting you. Fx you won't need any treatment. But as others have said plan something big to look forward to. Enjoy your weekend break.

Good luck to lol, woody and anyone else poas at weekend. We are long overdue another batch of Bfps.

Hello to everyone else and hope yous have a nice weekend.

Lolcbcblemonlime Fri 19-Oct-12 17:59:03

Hi all. I'm not poas until a week on Sunday so woody first. I still have an eternity to go sad before I can even think of poas.
Jen I've never heard of molar pg before. Sounds very sad. When will you hear for definite?

scaredmummy2B Fri 19-Oct-12 19:15:36

Hey girls my scan this morning confirmed no heartbeat booked in for a d and c tomorrow :-( will be my 3rd mc in ten months x

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Fri 19-Oct-12 19:40:38

Hi scared.

Really really sorry. I am sure even though you knew this was coming it has still hit you like a brick. Thinking of you.

messtins Fri 19-Oct-12 19:51:07

I'm sorry, scared. Good that you don't have to wait again for the ERPC though, I'm sure you want it all over with quickly. Will be thinking of you tomorrow.

scaredmummy2B Sat 20-Oct-12 07:58:42

Yes I am glad its getting all over and done with if thats wat had to happen I just wanted it done I sat them down and explained that and they made it happen finally nice treatment from the hospital its not actually hit me hard yet! Was sat in epau with 2 others that had same news we were just chatting and drinking coffee they were crying I'm just num from it all now I'm sure they thought I was totally heartless but I've cried so many tears for my unborn babys I don't feel I have any left right now! But why is life so cruel after the news and we went to the shop who did I run into my next door neighbor with massive baby bump that pissed me off more than anything she looked at me funny too probably coz I deleted her off facebook because I couldn. Bear to read one more happy baby status heartbeat this kicking that baby stuff grr goodbye my dh2b thinks I'm really nasty doing that why don't they understand I don't wanna hear that I'm not gonna ignore her in the street but I don't need to read all that right now x

YorkshirePeanut Sat 20-Oct-12 08:46:59

So sorry scared. I know it was expected but it doesn't make it any less sad. Understand how you feel about fb statuses - those 'xxx's baby is 16 weeks and developing toenails' tickers destroy me! rather than delete people maybe you could just block their updates in your feed for now if you don't want to upset them? They won't know you've done it xxx

woody good luck for tomorrow! Think we're all willing you a bfp!

Right, off to spend all day sat in front of the computer writing essays! Joy... X

woody17 Sat 20-Oct-12 10:42:15

Really sorry scared

scaredmummy2B Sat 20-Oct-12 10:52:24

She's the lady that came into my house after my last mc and showed me her new baby clothes! I don't care for insensitive people like that anyway if I've upset her sorry but tough shit

AlmondFrangipani Sat 20-Oct-12 18:31:02

Sorry Scared that you are having such a tough time.

Can I have your advice girls? So I am sure some of you have read in some of my older posts about my stressful job and insensitive boss...well I thought I would be stuck there forever more as the mat pay is great and I am paid reasonably well. But I am miserable...I have been there 5 years and bored, stressed and slowly loathing it. Well..out of the blue this week I had a very positive discussion with a customer about going to work for them. They are a charity, with a lovely ethos, amazing setting, supportive environment and 5 mins from new house (fingers crossed it all goes through) or 15 mins from current house. The job is totally different to what I do now so a bit scared about the new challenge but I practically cried thinking I had an escape plan! I wouldnt have to take a pay cut either! My dilemma lies with TTC. I think we would need to put it on hold until I was settled in the job and could guarantee getting SMP. Realistically this would be 5 months wait. Its a hard choice as I dont want to give up a great opportunity but it has been such a turbulent 6 months that I dont want to necessarily delay getting pg. The other slight concern is that I had the smile on the opk this morning and we last DTD on Thus so a small chance I might catch it this month...what would you guys do? It is so hard trying to balance career/money/pg/life!

Lolcbcblemonlime Sat 20-Oct-12 19:03:35

Almond is there anyway you can find out their mat leave policy? I think you need to be in the company for 26 weeks by the time you are 14 weeks? Also that only applies if they pay extra on top of smp. If you only get smp I think u can start even later.
Personally I would go for the happy job. You are only 32 (I'm 38!!!!) and have plenty of time. A job you love will benefit you in the long term and even help with ttc if it means you are less stressed.
Is it more money too or just a more intersecting job? What do you do btw?

suzydelarosa Sun 21-Oct-12 00:02:22

Almond where I work in order to qualify for smp you have to have been with the company for 26 weeks when you give your maternity leave 'notice'. So I think you're legally obliged to note that you're going off on mat leave sometime around 14 weeks before your due date... therefore you pretty much have to have gotten pregnant when you started at the company.... you can't come in pregnant. That's always been my understanding.

I think given the fact that you're on this thread, TTC is really important. Focus on that and the job will work out in the end. But i would def jump for the job... opportunities don't come along all the time and it's best to take them when you can and have 'no regrets'! (I've always regretted turning down some of the exciting opportunities that have come my way...)

good luck!

messtins Sun 21-Oct-12 08:49:32

To qualify for Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) you must:

have worked for your employer for at least 26 weeks up to the 15th week before the expected week of childbirth - known as the ‘qualifying week’
earn on average at least £107 a week
give the correct notice
give proof you’re pregnant

From the direct.gov website.

Which basically means you can't be pregnant when you start the job, but can get pregnant straight away. I understand your dilemma though, it's a bit off to start a new job fully intending to get pregnant as soon as possible. What would your longer term plan be? Would you go back after mat leave? i.e. if you were pregnant now, is being a SAHM for a while an 'out' from your current job and then you could look for something better?

Lolcbcblemonlime Sun 21-Oct-12 10:18:56

Where is woodsy with her bfp??? grin

Lolcbcblemonlime Sun 21-Oct-12 10:27:38

Erm meant woody. Stupid phone angry

YorkshirePeanut Sun 21-Oct-12 10:48:00

I second that lol! Woody everything is crossed for you, hope we hear good news later!

Almond I think you need to do what makes you happy, money isn't everything. Difficult of course as I don't know your circumstances but after doing many a horrible job myself, I've gone back to uni at 30 to learn to do a job I love and am now a poor student who waitresses part-time to make ends meet. Husband had a similarly crappy job (although well paid!) and he left to start his own business two years ago in full recession. We are VERY poor. But we are very happy, compared to how miserable I now realise we were before. And if a baby comes along, we'll be even poorer but even happier smile. Would this customer of yours be the sort of person you could talk this over with? Perhaps they'd be willing to consider offering you a job further down the line? Not an easy conversation, clearly...good luck making a decision. Personally, I'd go with taking the new job and then seeing what happens with ttc, because you can't second guess biology also because I am not well known for making rational decisions

woody17 Sun 21-Oct-12 11:23:30

Couldn't get a FRER but will be getting one today so I'm going to test in the morning! FX.

YorkshirePeanut Sun 21-Oct-12 12:08:22

My word woody you have more self-control than me. I'd be peeing on every stick in sight! and would have been since last Tuesday Good luck for tomorrow! x

messtins Sun 21-Oct-12 12:12:12

Good luck Woody!

AlmondFrangipani Sun 21-Oct-12 18:45:45

Woody Fx for the BFP tomorrow!! Report back first thing!!

Yorkshire you sound quite rational to me! I have been battling for some time the same head v heart decision you have been brave enough to make! If you take having a baby out of our equation then we will be no more financially worse off with the new job and I will have a 7 minute commute to work and get to work on a farm (which I would love). I think it would help a lot with my general wellbeing and stress levels so overall it seems like a win win situation...until you add babies.

Lol, Mess and Suzy thanks for the SMP advice. DH and I have talked and talked this weekend and have basically decided I should go for the new job. Whilst I would be loosing the great Mat Pay in my current job I would hopefully have a job that would be less stressful and something I want to return to afterwards (no option to be a SAHM for us). We have decided to hold the TTC until Spring so I could get my feet under the table at the new job (got to get it first) before worrying about it again and then qualify for the SMP. The only spanner in the works is if I fall pg this month...

woody17 Sun 21-Oct-12 19:01:23

Thank you - FRER is ready! Still feeling very nauseous and boobs are still very sore, tender and throbbing. Now having kind of creamy cm (almost looks like lotion). Nervous about testing though.

Yorkshirepeanut I've never tested +ve early before so didn't mind waiting until tomorrow - would rather put it off anyway if it's going to be a BFN.

almond I think that what you've decided sounds like a really good plan. I recently changed jobs/careers and it has made such a difference to me.

suzydelarosa Sun 21-Oct-12 20:22:34

Good luck woody! Let's go
BFp!

janiewoozle Sun 21-Oct-12 20:39:03

scared i'm so sorry to hear what you are going through again. be sure to take as much time as you need to and don't rush back to work. my thoughts are with you.

almond i would love to be in your situation! i say go for it. i have been in my job for over 10 years (since straight after i finished uni) and i would love a way out! now that i know i'm not allowed to TTC for a year, i am totally going to get on the job hunt. before the MC i actually started to breathe out as i thought i would have the maternity leave and maybe the option of finding something else part time afterwards instead of going back - but then that dream was shattered along with the the dream of being a mummy this time. i am currently considering a pay cut if i find something new. my current job is close by and well paid, but there are too many downsides and it makes me totally miserable. we get paid weekly by cheque (on a friday) and if you aren't there, you don't get your cheque. when i was off after the MC, i had missed 2 fridays and i had to go to my boss and ask for my pay even though he knew the reason i was off. i just thought it was a really mean thing to make me come and ask for it, knowing what i had been through. so the sooner i can grow some balls (in a feminine way haha!) i'll be handing my notice in. a few people have said to me that i should just quit as that's the only way i will actually go on the job hunt!

woody good luck for tomorrow morning - be sure to let s all know asap so that you can cheer up our monday morning!!

i'm hoping to get the call from the hospital asap regarding my molar pregnancy. just so i can ask all the questions i need to and get some answers. i'm not sure if it was complete or partial etc. so just need to put my mind at rest.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Sun 21-Oct-12 20:39:42

Hi all. Been a busy few days with work and visiting so not been on here much.
Scared sorry your sad news was confirmed.
Woody sounds really positive. FX for you. I had lotioney CM in lead up to positives!

kittykatskumkwat Sun 21-Oct-12 21:15:49

Hi girls, just caught up on thread after my week away, sorry to hear your news janie that sounds like a real difficult position to be put in and such a blow, sorry to hear scared that your mc was confirmed and you've had to face a surgical option again, life has felt you some really cruel blows lately
Woody my fingers are firmly crossed for you, can't wait to see your update!!
On the job front I'd say go for it, if the worst happened and you didn't qualify for the mat pay you would deal with it but having a job you look forward to is worth it's weight in gold and I think fate has played a part comming at the right time- I often think this looking back

Gingerpanther27 Sun 21-Oct-12 21:54:20

Fx crossed for you woody you defo have a lot more self-control than I do when it comes to POAS lolblush

woody17 Mon 22-Oct-12 08:48:07

Hi everyone - I tested this morning and got an incredibly faint line - it's definitely there though. Really hope that line does get stronger and this isn't a chem pg. But I think I'm only just 4 weeks and maybe less with this being a wtf cycle.

So this is 3rd pg this year. Really hope that this one does work out and not end in mc again. Hoping that all the horrible nausea and very very sore boobs are good signs that things are ok.

Hope the run up to Christmas makes the next 8 weeks go by quickly!

kittykatskumkwat Mon 22-Oct-12 08:53:01

gringringringrin yeay woody
Fx for your sticky bean this time!!
Can't believe that you've had almost exactly the same as me in regards to how things have happened recently

woody17 Mon 22-Oct-12 08:56:29

I know kitty!

I really hope that all the changes I've made to my lifestyle and diet help this one to stick. And hopefully the acupuncture will work too!

Lolcbcblemonlime Mon 22-Oct-12 09:03:44

Yay woody! That's fab news. Try not to panic and take it one day at a time. It must be impossible... But f x it's third time lucky for you!

woody17 Mon 22-Oct-12 09:13:17

Thank you lol I'm just going to keep telling myself that previous 2 mcs were very different and there's no reason why this one wont work!

littlepinkfizz Mon 22-Oct-12 09:24:03

Hooray woody well done and congratulations! Keeling all crossed that its a sticky one x

janiewoozle Mon 22-Oct-12 09:25:04

woop woop woody* absolutely delighted for you!! xx

YorkshirePeanut Mon 22-Oct-12 09:31:26

Wahoo! Fantastic woody, massively chuffed for you! About time we had some happy news on here! Fx for a very sticky little bean xxx

MissMedusa Mon 22-Oct-12 09:32:31

Congratulations woody I'm so happy for you!

woody17 Mon 22-Oct-12 10:05:07

Thank you everyone - it's really nice to be able to share it as we're not going to tell anyone in RL at the moment. Really hope this one sticks.

MunchinMango Mon 22-Oct-12 11:30:07

Wow woody that's fantastic news. Huge congrats to you.

suzydelarosa Mon 22-Oct-12 11:32:11

woody you have made my morning. A line is a line!! So pleased, please stay on the thread and keep us posted about how you're getting on.

Every p/g is different so no reason why this little one can't make it!

messtins Mon 22-Oct-12 13:17:57

Brilliant news, Woody grin ! FX it all continues to go well. About time we had some good news on the thread.

MrsJLS85 Mon 22-Oct-12 13:26:58

congratulations Woody really so very happy for you! Fx this is the sticky one. Test again in 48 hours and if its a darker line you know thats a good sign!!

Quinandthem Mon 22-Oct-12 15:44:46

Congrats Woody. So good when someone gets some good news.

Is it sad that altough i'm day 31 (on a usual 30/31 for the last 4 months) cycle without any period symptoms that i dont want to POAS due to the high chance that i'm not pregnant - i want to believe i could be a bit longer.

after my MC in Feb my cycles went crazy for a while - even had 36 and a 45 day cycle with no positive - hense why i dont want to POAS yet...

To top it off my brother has announced that they are pregnant so this month would hit me even harder than most (for those that remember by step-sister just gave birth 10 days ago!).

Gingerpanther27 Mon 22-Oct-12 16:30:16

Congrats woody grin I shall be POAS next Wednesday ;) if I have enough self control not to in the mean time lol blush but cos of wtf cycles not sure if it will be the following Sunday for POAS I'm going off my own calculations but a link I got off one of the threads says I have a 34 day cycle hence why not sure of dates now but covered all bases dtd as much as possible grin blush so really hoping will have a BFP and nice sticky bean to look forward to before the year is out (hopefully month) smile how is everyone else getting on?

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 22-Oct-12 18:43:19

Hooray Hooray grin Woody . Remind me what lifestyle changes you made rushes off to get notepad
Quin I'm on day 20 something and still no sign of ovulation! This is a WTF cycle too and so was last month. Hold onto the belief a bit longer and you are always in with a chance even if you DTD only once!
KittKats How are you and how was your holiday?
Hi everyone else.

woody17 Mon 22-Oct-12 21:59:26

Thank you for all your nice messages. Really trying to be positive. There's no reason why this one wont work out and if I do end up having any brown spotting, it can be absolutely fine. This is what I keep telling myself anyway.

Quin hope you're ok.

FX for you ginger

babyjames since I got pg the first time, I've now being taking folic acid etc for 6 months. When I got pg the first time, I'd only been taking it for about a week. For the last month, I've given up caffeine. I'm eating much more healthily - a lot more fruit and veg and we've cut back dramatically on take aways. I've changed careers and now have a job that is so much less stressful and pressurised - this wasn't a decision taken to try and get pg though. Because of that I'm a lot happier, more relaxed and get more sleep! I'm having acupuncture and seeing a homeopath. Having wheat grass drink things twice a day. So, I really hope that these things make a difference! I know that it's unlikely to change anything but it does make me feel better.

jessie how are you getting on?

AlmondFrangipani Mon 22-Oct-12 22:32:55

Massive Congrats Woody!!! V happy for you. You know you said you got a new job...how long where you in it before TTC or now ur pg wink? I'm just trying to work out what the best thing to do our end (pending I actually get the job!).

woody17 Tue 23-Oct-12 09:11:08

Thank you almond, I now work for myself from home.

What do you think that you're going to do? How long would you take off for maternity leave?

Quinandthem Tue 23-Oct-12 10:26:16

Hi girls,

Well I was feeling a bit queasy yesterday – not constantly but enough to make you think ‘what was that’. So I POAS when I got home and it came up with a positive. So excited but I had to wait an hour for my OH to get home from work and think of a way to tell him.

We are re-doing our downstairs toilet so I decided to tell him that I couldn’t help him seal the tiles (that we were planning to do last night) as I couldn’t work with the adhesive because we were pregnant – and I showed him the stick.

He was very happy as he was also starting to get a bit concerned about the lack of progress.

Now my next problem is that my dad & step mum are coming to stay this weekend, and whilst we’re not alcoholics – drinking will be expected on Saturday night with the meal and afterwards. I don’t want to tell anyone yet so does anyone have any good excuses that I could roll out for why I’m not drinking, antibiotics?

p.s. I’ve also changed to de-caff coffee and generally get a bit healthier as my bmi was 30.

janiewoozle Tue 23-Oct-12 11:35:27

congrats quin that hour long wait must have felt like a year!!! delighted for you!

when i was pregnant i got a urinary tract infection and the docs put me on amoxycillin. i was away visiting friends and said i was on antibiotics and they guessed straight away that i was preggers - they thought i was telling lies - prob because i had been talking the month before about TTC etc.

but maybe if your family aren't aware that you're trying then it would be ok. also a urinary tract infection is one of those things that people don't like to talk about - it's a bit more personal/private than say a chest infection - so they won't push it!! often people say that drinking is fine on antibiotics - which it kind of is, but it just makes the pills not be as effective etc.

another option is to have vodka and cranberry or vodka lime and soda but actually just have the mixer - but make sure DH goes to the bar or pours them for you!!

Gingerpanther27 Tue 23-Oct-12 11:59:09

Congrats quin smile l

messtins Tue 23-Oct-12 13:03:49

Congratulations Quin ! Hurray for lots more BFPs on the board!

MissMedusa Tue 23-Oct-12 13:13:17

Another BFP, this is a really lucky thread!
Congratulations quin

Quinandthem Tue 23-Oct-12 13:47:32

thanks - fingers crossed it's a sticky month for everyone...

now have to try not to be a neurotic mess with every twing or pain which i think might be even more difficult than getting pregnant!

is it wrong that i'm actually hoping for morning sickness just so i know some pregnancy hormonesare flying around?

YorkshirePeanut Tue 23-Oct-12 16:37:15

OOOH two on the trot! Congratulations Quin! I used to go for a tonic water with lime, nobody can tell there's no gin....but depends on your usual tipple I suppose! And I hope I'm sick CONSTANTLY next time, so I know what you mean - last time I had diddly squat in the symptom stakes.

In other news, for all us still TTC, I think Morrisons have made a mistake on their pricing and CB ov stick 7 packs are selling at £3.33 at my local Morribobs, think they're normally about £17. Needless to say have just bought four packs haha! Take THAT, Mr Clearblue, I've got some of my money back off you! Mwahaha!

MunchinMango Tue 23-Oct-12 16:58:10

Congrats Quinn. At last some Bfps to cheer us all on.

Peanut good shopping on the opks!!! Your right I would have bought loads as well.

YorkshirePeanut Tue 23-Oct-12 17:02:36

munchin I needed cheering up, friend had her baby today, and I'm feeling a bit bad for feeling a bit bad about it! Love her dearly and am so pleased for them, but........meh envy

MunchinMango Tue 23-Oct-12 17:25:54

Peanut don't feel bad I would prob feel same as you too. It's great for your friend but its bittersweet for you. I had my sil to stay at weekend with her 11mth old baby and her 6 mth baby bump!!! I should have been due our baby this month but alas not to be. Chin up and fx for a bfp soon for all of us.

kittykatskumkwat Tue 23-Oct-12 17:51:28

Yorkshire they've been that price for the last month, I mentioned it earlier in the thread, no mistake as it said save £12.96 on the price guide

kittykatskumkwat Tue 23-Oct-12 17:51:54

Oh so I ended up with 3 packs I now don't need blush

kittykatskumkwat Tue 23-Oct-12 17:59:14

Congrats to Quinn, sorry missed your bfp, so pleased for you x

AlmondFrangipani Tue 23-Oct-12 18:06:16

Congrats Quin!! Loving all the BFP's!!

Woody working for yourself sounds amazing! I have decided to try and go for the job and called them yesterday to say that. I am due to meet the Chairman on 2nd Nov. They said they wanted to recruit someone by the end of the year ready for a start in Jan so I guess I will know in a month. The problem is patience is not my strong point and I am waiting on the job thing, waiting for the house buy to go through and now waiting to TTC! Feel a bit sad about not TTC for a few months but it is best if I get this job...

YorkshirePeanut Tue 23-Oct-12 18:06:32

hahaha kitty really? Bummer, thought I'd bagged myself a bargain, there was no savings sign just the price! Never mind, at least I won't run out in the near future... How are you doing? xxx

kittykatskumkwat Tue 23-Oct-12 20:11:08

Oh no peanut it still is a major bargin, not sure how long it will go on for but can't see it much longer,you would still make money on them if you sold them on eBay which is what I'll do if I get through this pregnancy, seems like tempting fate at the minute! I'm good really, the 12ww is obviously going on forever but I've not had any danger signs yet touches wood I'm having a private scan on sat when I should be 9wks just for reasurance x

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 23-Oct-12 21:15:46

Congrats on the bfp's kittykats if you fancy selling il buy the sticks. Dont seem to sell them in my local store.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Tue 23-Oct-12 21:16:50

Sorry all for mixed up message! Silly phone!

kittykatskumkwat Wed 24-Oct-12 07:19:42

Ha ha ok baby if you pm me your address I will sell you some, I've got 3 boxes of 7 and you can have them for what I paid which is £3.38 per box I think, just let me know if you do and how many

posyplum Wed 24-Oct-12 11:19:55

Woody congratulations!!! I am so pleased for you - woo! Big big fx for a sticky bean. xxx

posyplum Wed 24-Oct-12 11:20:54

Congrats too Quin - wow, I have missed a lot! What a lucky thread. x

suzydelarosa Wed 24-Oct-12 14:20:20

babyjames - how are you getting on this cycle? I think we were OV at the same time so just checking that you DTD on the weekend and are going to be poas-ing with me next week.

Sorry - am I getting too personal?!! Nothing like a stranger writing you to remind you to have sex!!

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Wed 24-Oct-12 18:02:20

Fx for sticky beans smile kitty yey thanks so much. I went to morrisons today and mine def don't sell them! I will try pm you when get home if I can work it out. Il take the lot please.
suzy. Think my body is struggling to ovulate this month, a other wtf cycle! I've wasted tons of sticks a s no smiley yet ! We will all hold your hand though. I so hope I get my sticky bean soon.

BettyFlutterbly Wed 24-Oct-12 19:59:43

Hi ladies.
I'm back home after a week away for my Grandad's funeral.
Great to come back to two bfps. Congrats!
I'm on cd19 and ov yesterday. As I was away from dh for a week we've been more than happy to dtd regardless of ov!! I'm not going to buy any tests this month unless af is very late 'cos I was just too obsessed about it all last month and then so down when I got my bfns and then af.
I hope we see loads more bfps on here this month and next.

kittykatskumkwat Thu 25-Oct-12 07:12:45

No probs baby, I havnt checked yet but will sort it out this weekend, I was in morrisons yesterday and they've stoped selling them in mine now and there is a different brand there, I wonder if they are getting rid to switch brands so it will go on till they've all gone, anyhow they've gone from mine now

Lolcbcblemonlime Thu 25-Oct-12 07:57:10

Morning girls. Af showed this morning. A bit gutted but happy cycle back to normal 31 days.

messtins Thu 25-Oct-12 08:51:48

Welcome back Betty I think I ov'd yesterday so we can be cycle buddies this time round.
LolC sorry to hear the witch got you sad (been waiting for an excuse to use a halloween smiley!) but good that you are back to normal cycles. Good luck for the next one.
scared how are you? Haven't seen you post the last few days.

suzydelarosa Thu 25-Oct-12 12:32:51

morning all, Visited fertility expert at the recurrent miscarriage clinic in Oxford this morning and thought I'd pass on some of the wisdom that I was relayed. First as I already had a child with my partner it's likely that the m/c was due to my age and associated problems with my old egg! And bad luck, he said. At my age (42) 30-40% of pregnancies will end up in m/c. So that's good news to those out there with kids... luck o the draw!

I asked about progesterone supplements and he said it's a myth that they make a difference to an early pregnancy; if the progesterone levels are going down the pregnancy is failing and there's not much that can be done about it.

I worried about my age but if I have regular periods I am still fertile and should be able to carry a baby, it's just the wonky eggs that might let me down in the end. IVF would make little difference as the issue isn't conceiving but the quality of the egg.

BMI is important and getting your BMI down to a reasonable level. Hey ho.

Finally he mentioned that genetic testing is sometimes useful for people who can't conceive and/or haven't had a successful pregnancy. He gave me some scary quote that '2% of people walking around Oxford have (what I think he called) mutated/translocated genes' which hasn't affected them but affects their fertility/ability to conceive and offspring. By that time I was dozing out a bit so didn't get the details. Science is not my forte.

have arranged for blood tests to test blood clotting issues, genetic tests to ensure no translocated issues and the like.

Hope this was helpful - good luck this month everyone. I'll be POAS-ing next week.

MunchinMango Thu 25-Oct-12 16:38:26

Thanks Suzy for sharing that. As I'm fast approaching 41 I'd say I'm in the dodgy egg category too. I suppose what will be will be. Only regret ill maybe have is that we didn't decide to ttc a couple of years earlier.

Welcome back Betty.

Sorry lol that AF got you.

Good luck to anyone poas soon. Fx for more Bfps.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Thu 25-Oct-12 18:48:15

Hi all,
Welcome back Betty , good to hear that there has been lots of DTD going on. Sorry the quality time with DH wasn't under happier circumstances.
Lol sorry AF got you. sad
Thanks so much for sharing Suzy. Really interesting and useful information,
Messtins Yay to ovulation.
I got my grin on opk this afternoon so am happy! Was getting a bit worried it wasn't going to happen! Nearly out of sticks! Got a night in a hotel with DH Saturday so if I'm due to ovulate next few days it's good timing wink plus get an extra hour in bed as DM has DS, bonus!
Kittykats I can't remember how to PM. Can you remind me or PM me as I know how to respond! Sorry! Good luck with your private scan. Hope it puts your mind at rest a bit.

Lolcbcblemonlime Thu 25-Oct-12 19:49:08

Thanks all.
Baby- I'm using cb for first time this month. When does ov generally happen after smiley?
I need to time my shags as we don't do it as much as we should so every bit of info helps! I paid 24 quid from amazon for 20 sticks and the test thingy. Is that good value?

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Thu 25-Oct-12 20:02:33

Hi Lol think thats cheaper than I've paid before. I think ovulation usually happens anytime 12-24 (Maybe 48?) hours later. Think the smiley is the start of the surge. I got pregnant last 2 cycles using them but both ended in MC sad

Gingerpanther27 Thu 25-Oct-12 23:02:19

lol that's excellent value grin I ran out of opk sticks and cbf travelling 40 odd miles to get them am not paying 20 quid for 5!!!! hmm

suzydelarosa Thu 25-Oct-12 23:16:56

lol the opk says ovulation happens 24 to 36 hours after you've seen the grin. I read and re-read that bit.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Fri 26-Oct-12 18:26:00

Thanks Suzy will keep at it till Sunday then wink. What happens if you get more than 1 day of smile ?

suzydelarosa Fri 26-Oct-12 19:13:55

babyjames since I love to poas I keep doing it from the moment I got my smiley --- just out of curiosity to see how long it lasted. The smiley lasted about 24 hours, which I suppose showed when the LH surge was happening. I think i ovulated soon after that.

Last week I tested in the afternoon and got a smiley and there was no smiley the next day. worth looking at the colored line on the test - the darker the better.

However I'm not pregnant yet so no expert yet.

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Fri 26-Oct-12 19:20:51

The line was dark when got the Smiley this morning. I got pregnant last 2 cycles using it but lost both sad

Room for another?
In the middle of mc (7wks pg) & looking forward to getting back to trying for DC2. Have a DS, 10 months & we've been trying for #2 since Feb, 'glad' that this mc has confirmed I can get pg (had been busy googling secondary infertility).

Have got internet cheapy pg & opk's on the way.

Gingerpanther27 Sat 27-Oct-12 15:05:29

Sorry to see you on here horse after seeing you on November bus

YorkshirePeanut Sun 28-Oct-12 09:14:30

Morning all! Finally a day off...smile

Hi horse, sorry you've had to join us x

Anyone know what time it is? grin

Am feeling a bit pants at the moment ladies. I was so excited when flipping AF showed, but now I wish I hadn't bought those CB ov sticks. When I started using them on what I think was cd10 the test line was fainter than the control line, but not much...they got progressively fainter and now cd15 they're hardly showing. Does that mean I could have ovulated before I even started testing? In which case I totally missed the boat. Or of course I could have not ovulated yet and am sulking for no reason. Am already panicking about having another 3-month wtf cycle..am so quick to think the worst <plays Psycho music in head>

Anyway. Have decided to try and inject a bit of romance back into the babymaking proceedings, have booked a very swanky room at a hotel on Tues night (random but we're both off that night) so taking him to see James Bond, dinner, then surprising him with hotel and raunchy knickers! Who knows if there'll be any eggs knocking about to fertilize, but at least it'll be a change of scenery. Doing the baby jig is not all that romantic when your bedroom's got knickers drying on the radiators and the dog pops in to watch halfway through!

I've lost track of who's where, anyone waiting to POAS at the moment?

messtins Sun 28-Oct-12 18:51:34

Hello Horse sorry you are joining us but you are most welcome!

Yorkshire envy at your night away. Enjoy!

I had a sad day yesterday - went on a church away day and ended up totally dumping on one of the women there, turned out she had 2 MC back in the day. Spent a while in floods of tears, but maybe it was a good thing. I feel like I got over it all much quicker this time round but have just got stuck feeling really flat, grumpy with everything and very unsure about what comes next and whether I even want to be TTC (though we are, or at least not preventing). Maybe a good bawl will let me move on a bit?

Lolcbcblemonlime Mon 29-Oct-12 11:56:29

Oh mess I hope u feel better today.
Has anyone seen woody since her bfp?!
I'm feeling ok. Had a good weekend laden with alcohol and have a busy week ahead of me. Still ages until ov time sad

IBelieveInPink Mon 29-Oct-12 12:45:49

Hi ladies. I am almost ready to come back and join you. grin
I had the erpc last week, so back to square one again. We have been advised to wait a month until we can start to try again, am wondering how many people actually do this though?!
Trying to keep busy in the meantime, and booking in lots of fun things to do.
I just feel quite impatient to start again. Not that I am not upset about the mc, or that I feel it not important, I just feel like I want to make the most of this supposedly extra fertile time! Is that crazy?
Anyone got any ideas on how to make the time between now and starting to TTC again pass? It's gonna drive me nuts, all this waiting!!!

Thanks for the welcome Yorkshire & messtins!

messtins, sorry you had a sad day, but talking about it all sounds like a good thiing.

Yorkshire, I don't ovulate until day 19 the earliest so you could just be testing at completely the wrong time?
Sounds like a lovely evening you've planned! Don't know why you'd want to remove a panting dog from the atmosphere of the baby jig (we've got house rabbits & I always make sure they can't see us...would hate for them to get ideas).

lol, sounds like you had a good weekend!

IBelieve, I've not had a erpc, but we're hoping to get back down to business when the bleeding stops, like you it feels like a waste of time waiting.
I guess if you're really not wanting to do it this month, you could spend the month doing whatever turns you both on (relaxing the ttc atmosphere?).

Hope everyone has a good week!

YorkshirePeanut Mon 29-Oct-12 18:39:35

Horse, we have a dog and two cats, and they are all dirty peeping Toms! Have lost count of the amount of times have had a romantic encounter spoilt by looking up to find we're being eyeballed by an unimpressed animal...

Had another go with those ov sticks today, I'm not sure but I think I might have got a positive. It looks about the same colour as the control line. Who knows? Going to be dtd anyway tomorrow so fingers crossed I'm right!

messtins a good crying session is always useful I think! I'm not sure I've felt quite like you have in that I'm rabid about trying again and always have been, but I can understand the flat 'meh' feeling where everything seems a bit pointless, particularly when AF was refusing to show! Hope you're feeling better soon x

lol boozy weekend sounds lovely! I also overindulged and paid the price yesterday morning. Ouch.

Ibelieve waiting sucks! Wish I knew how to make it go faster, I can tell you with certainty that thumb-twiddling doesn't help...

I have such horrible heartburn today. Wish it were a symptom of something exciting but unless you get heartburn with ovulation, I think it's just a leftover from my weekend on the wine! Time to break out the Gaviscon...

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Mon 29-Oct-12 21:34:42

Hello all,
welcome Horse and welcome back Ibelieve.
Messtins sorry you had a down day. I also have very up and down days.
I had a night out on Saturday to Comedy club and a hotel with DH. Also drank a bit much letting of steam I think for the 2 MC last cycles. Was a good night but also hard as my friend is 9 weeks pregnant about where I should be sad
Enjoy your night out tomorrow Peanut sounds great.
I'm just starting the dreaded 2 week wait. Anyone else similar?

YorkshirePeanut Mon 29-Oct-12 21:56:53

Assuming all goes well and I haven't been misled by the sticks, I'm tentatively thinking that I'll be starting the 2ww later this week baby, so might join you for a POAS date! My friend had a baby today, the second friend to give birth in a week, so am feeling a bit put out. Fx the hotel does the trick tomorrow... wink

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Mon 29-Oct-12 23:23:25

horse really sorry you are here.

suzy thanks for the post about your recurrent mc appointment. I had a similar appointment but only saw one of the juniors. He didn't have much of a clue, just wanted to sign me up to the promise trial. They give progesterone supplements during early pregnancy. I asked him for more details but he didn't know the details.

Dh and I have had the blood tests for genetic screening. He said he thought they would come back ok as we have a dd together.

Hi, I thought I might join this thread, I was part of the bfp in 2012 thread, then the June 2013 antenatal thread, now back to square one after mc yesterday. I feel pretty low right now, need a bit of hope. We will try again but it all feels risky and worrying right now. I don't even know when cd1 will be, right now I'm still bleeding from the mc, although it's probably tailing off now.

posyplum Tue 30-Oct-12 13:00:42

James so sorry to hear about your mc yesterday sad We all understand what you are going through. It's early days yet so go easy on yourself. xx

Horse also sorry you have to join us but welcome!

babyjames I am also in the 2ww - 5dop - here we go again! (sigh)
xxx

messtins Tue 30-Oct-12 13:24:56

Hi James so sorry to hear about your MC. You are very welcome as soon as you are ready to get back in the bus queue.

Peanut have a good night out!

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Tue 30-Oct-12 13:53:25

Hi james I'm so very sorry.

IBelieveInPink Tue 30-Oct-12 14:07:00

Hiya James. I am right there with you, in the scary upsetting bit.
Look after yourself, I was doing okay to begin with, then the last few days have really got me down. I don't mean this will happen to you, just take each day as it comes and get someone to give you lots of hugs. X

Good luck to everyone in the 2ww.
Have a wonderful night tonight Yorkshire!

JamesandGiant, I'm sorry you're having such a rough time of it.

I should be going to the EPU tomorrow, I've just poas and it's a BFN (not even a hint of a line), I haven't bled for about 5 hours, should I still bother going in?

Horse, I'm in a similar situation, supposed to be having a scan on Friday initially to check for a heartbeat but now to check for anything remaining. I am still bleeding but I'm pretty sure it's all out so not sure whether to bother going. I hate being messed with at the best of times and I've had to call in favours to get child care etc

Not very well today, woke up with nausea (ironic as I never had any while pg) and the runs, so I can't tell what pain/aching is what. I can't get warm and the kids are fighting constantly. Oh and my tesco delivery just arrived, I carried all the shopping back and forth, then as the fella left I noticed I'd leaked blood all down the back of my jeans, which he probably saw. sad (groan)

Bit of a selfish moany post, sorry. Thanks for the welcome x

Pink, how far along were you? I was about 7-8 weeks, so it hasn't been too bad considering what some women go through. I feel a bit of a failure and somehow ashamed to tell people (everyone knew I was pg) even though it makes no sense. I messaged one if my closest friends to tell her, she read the message (it notified me) and never replied.

Lolcbcblemonlime Wed 31-Oct-12 13:43:57

That is awful James. I'm also in a similar situation. Mc at 7 weeks in July and my best friend of over 20 years who has not kids or desire to have any just did not understand what I went through.

YorkshirePeanut Wed 31-Oct-12 14:33:16

Morning all! I'm feeling pretty upbeat today. Had a lovely night last night, Bond and bonking (sadly not with Bond, but husband makes a pretty good substitute). Hotel was gorgeous, a proper boudoir, in fact I'm fairly sure a girl could get pregnant just by walking in the room grin - well I can live in hope! So following a maybe LH surge on Monday and two days solid shagging I guess I'm about to start the 2ww....eeep. Going to DTD again tomorrow for luck and then wait and see!

Hi James so sorry you're here. The first few weeks are the worst, especially when other people don't get it. We'd told everyone by the time we had the mc, had to basically announce it by social media as I couldn't face texting/phoning everyone. Some people still haven't mentioned it to me, as if it never happened..some of them pretty 'good' friends as well! Hope you're coping ok x

Clairey2012 Wed 31-Oct-12 19:39:45

Hi can I join in please. I miscarried 4days ago at 9 weeks, totally gutted cos you never think it will happen to you.it was my first pregnancy and apparently it's very common. Went for my scan today and it came back all clear so nothing left of pregnancy, atleast I didn't need any medical intervention. 2 days ago the thought of starting over again was sop daunting however today I'm like ready to start over when I get my next period. I never thought all this baby making business would be soo difficult, I suppose the outcome will be soo worth it.x

Yorkshire, envy Hotel sounds lovely. Good luck on the 2ww!

James, sorry you're feeling bad. I decided not to go (if I feel off next week I will), I don't think I could cope with sitting in a waiting room atm, have you decided if you're going to go in?

Clairey, sorry to hear of your mc. 'Glad' you didn't need intervention & you're ready to start again asap, hope it's successful for you asap.
Sorry it took to your scan for you to find out.

Has anyone got anything lovely planned for the weekend?
PIL are coming over to watch DS on Saturday so DH & I can have a day out to relax, thinking of going Christmas Shopping in London, which is probably not a relaxing idea!!

Horse no I've decided not to bother as I'm pretty sure everything's out except for inevitable bleeding. The epu nurse said wait til I stop bleeding (which could be up to 2-3 weeks) then wait 48 hours, take a pg test and it should be bfn, if not then arrange for a rescan. I just want to forget this whole thing. Not even entirely sure I want to ttc another just yet, I feel so shocked that this happened. I suppose I was spoilt in my last pregnancy, I had bleeding but it turned out to be nothing, so I assumed this would be the same. Even now, when I'm positive I did mc, i keep having dreams that it's all a mistake and I'll find out in a few weeks that the baby is tucked away in there. hmm

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Thu 01-Nov-12 18:15:39

Hi all
welcome James and Claire so sorry you find yourselves here. MC is just such a sad and terrible thing. I agree about people not understanding and not mentioning it. My best friend is now pregnant and doesnt mention my MC and I feel I have to ask about her pregnancy. It's killing me. Most my team at work have not mentioned it. Everyone seems to get sent a card when off with anything from a cough to a house move yet not one for me either time I MC and no mention of it ever since by most people. Makes me sad that Knowone understands what I've been through or seems to care how we are doing.

Clairey2012 Thu 01-Nov-12 18:16:38

Bless you James..... I feel totaly the same. I just keep thinking this is all just a bad dream and i'm going to wake up and be pregnant again. I feel soo helpless and feel iv'e been left in limbo. I keep having moments of anger aswel and thinking "why me?" it just seems so unfair because it was planned, and I know lots of other people who have had gone to have a child unplanned. was positive yestaday but feeling quite low today.

Clairey2012 Thu 01-Nov-12 18:32:05

Hi babyjames. My husband has been totaly supportive and alot of my friends have also been there for me. I was so supprised that it was my grandma who im quite close with was like "you need to get over it! there will be other babies" I was so cross because it only happened at the weekend. she just didnt get it. its funny how the people who you think will be the most supportive turn out to be the least. Its nice to have online forums to actualy say how you feel without worrying that you will be judged for saying how you feel. xxxx

YorkshirePeanut Thu 01-Nov-12 19:51:25

Hi Clairey sorry you're here with us, but we're a pretty lovely bunch really. Hope you're feeling ok all things considered. I think it's only natural to be up and down for a while. One day you think you're ok and dealing with it well, moving on, the next day you feel incredibly rubbish and angry. Glad your husband and friends are there to help you along x

Horse you're brave doing the Christmas shop in London! I do it online haha, lazy option every time smile. I'm going out with the in-laws and husband tonight for dinner, currently fixing a grin into position. Hopefully it won't slip too much as long as I stay off the wine and as long as nobody assumes it's because I'm pregnant when I'm not

Hope everyone's having a good week anyway! Been a bit quiet on here recently, hopefully because everyone's busy working on their BFPs grin

KittyBump Thu 01-Nov-12 22:40:17

Hi everyone - could I join too please? Sorry its going to be a long one!

Started miscarrying on October 14th which was the day before my 12 week scan - scan showed an empty sac measuring about 6 weeks so either blighted ovum or early loss of baby but sac kept developing. Although the initial bleeding was an awful shock I'm glad it happened then as otherwise i would have been completely unprepared at the scan sad

This was my second pregnancy, I have a DD who is 22 months - I realise now how very lucky we were to have a straightforward pg and birth and healthy baby. I'm so sad for all of us having to go through this and especially for those for whom it was their first pregnancy.

I have a scan tomorrow at the EAPU to see if everything is gone (had one last Monday too which showed the sac still there) - I think i actually miscarried on Tuesday this week but I'm still bleeding quite heavily; i had no idea that miscarriages could take this long (and much longer from what I have now read).

Anyway, sorry this is so long. DH and I are very keen to start ttc again and so I wanted to join you lot in cracking open the ovulation sticks and pg tests again smile
Still not sure whether to wait for AF or not - any advice?

james sorry you're friend hasn't contacted you, I'm in a similar position (friend texted to say 'hope you don't feel too bad' on Oct 15th then nothing since then!). I guess it's hard to know what to say to us sad

kittykatskumkwat Fri 02-Nov-12 07:51:09

Hi everyone just wanted to check in and see how everyone was, welcome to clairey James and kitty, sorry to see you here especially kitty, we were on the bfp thread together and it seems particulaly cruel for you to have got all the way to your 12wk scan, I had a very easy first pregnancy too and although I was worried nothing bad happened, when I got pregnant again I didn't even give mc a second though as dh said let's just enjoy this one and it came as I really harsh blow and shock!
Good look to everyone on the 2ww, baby I will on you but if you want to wait to see what happens this month first that's cool aswell , anyone seen anything from woody? I hope she's ok, she may be taking it easy off mn but she does usually say ?

kittykatskumkwat Fri 02-Nov-12 07:51:50

Oh I was kittykatsforever if I name changed and you didn't know smile

KittyBump Fri 02-Nov-12 14:23:55

Hiya kittykat thanks for the welcome, I do remember you from the conception boards and that you had had a mc. I tried to read back to see how you were doing (not a crazy stalker honest!) but I couldn't keep track, are you pg now?
It was crap getting all the way to 12 weeks for this to happen but I felt very odd the whole time, I couldn't say I was pg without some kind of follow up statement like 'all being well' or 'let's wait for the scan' and I had to remind myself that I was of all the time, it's like my subconscious could not hold on to the fact.
Had my scan today - unfortunately not all clear, still an active blood supply and retained tissue so another week of waiting then scan number 5!

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Fri 02-Nov-12 17:59:12

Hello Kittybump so sorry for your loss. What a terrible thing to find out at 12 weeks. Sorry that you are also not able to move on physically just yet. All these scans must be so difficult too.

Welcome back Kitty. How are you feeling? Did last Saturday go ok? Was thinking of you.

kittykatskumkwat Fri 02-Nov-12 20:36:46

Hi kitty, oh that really sucks about your scan sad, my last mc was prolonged in that I was bleeding for 4 weeks in total and it really got me down it's such a complicated thing, are they just waiting to see if things go naturally for you?
I am pregnant again yes, I got caught straight away the month after mc ( this was my second) I waited the first time as told but it still went wrong then this time just went for it and bang, should be 10 wks today, I had a scan last wkend and all was well, little bean groving away which sonographer said was a really good sign ( thanks for thinking of me baby smile) hopefully this is 3 rd time lucky for me, if it went wrong ifmd definatly give myself a break over Xmas etc but I am feeling as positive as you can

KittyBump Fri 02-Nov-12 21:17:36

hi james and kittykat thanks for your thoughts, i was pretty fed up after the scan I really thought this would be the last one. Yes just waiting for it to happen naturally, I'm still bleeding fairly heavily so seems like it is happening just very slowly. It's more the faffing about that is bothering me now, getting someone to mind DD, getting to the hospital, paying £3 for approx 35 minutes of parking...

Anyway, kittykat i'm so pleased for you, that's brilliant grin its interesting what you say about not waiting, I don't want to wait but I think if I did mc again I would think it was because i should have waited confused

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Fri 02-Nov-12 21:20:06

So glad all was well Kitty . Was a bit worried when you wern't around. I think all we can do is take each day at a time. I'l second the 3rd time lucky.
Having a bit of a wobble and a few tears tonight. DH is out as he was last night and I think at this end of my cycle the pressure is getting to me.

kittykatskumkwat Sat 03-Nov-12 06:37:25

It is very emotional baby and kitty, I dont think much compares to how isolating it can be, particulaly as alot of people don't know what to say or say the wrong thing or ignore you completely, it's like what was mentioned unthread with the card etc, to us it's still a loss and a much longed for one, a good cry can definatly help though!
Thanks for your kind words baby, I'll be honist I didnt rush on and mention or bring it up unless asked purley because alot of you are still getting over your mc and grieving plus trying and I know sometimes the last thing you feel like hearing is oh I'm pregnant or yes it's going great, but I do like to keep in touch and see how you all are as this thread was so supportive smile

YorkshirePeanut Sat 03-Nov-12 13:59:50

Hi Kittybump, so sorry for your loss and that the physical part of it is taking so long for you. Fingers crossed not much longer.

Hiya kittykats glad all is going well!

Baby poor you having a rotten time. I kind of feel the same. Three friends and several acquaintances have all announced births in the last two weeks and for some reason I've convinced myself this week that it's never going to happen for us. Very tired, very emotional and it's all getting a bit too much for me at the moment! I think (going on my very dodgy calculations) that I can poas on the 12th. It's going to be a really, really long wait. When will you test?

Horse hope you have a lovely day today!

And hello everyone else! x

babyjamesblackberrycrumble Sat 03-Nov-12 14:22:51

ou whats Horse doing nice today?

KittyKat It's nice to hear that things are going well for you this time. Gives me hope. You also seem a lovely lady and always have something nice to say smile

Yorkshire Think I will test the 11th or 12th too. I don't seem to have any symptoms though sad FX for us both

Hello to everyone else too!

YorkshirePeanut Sat 03-Nov-12 14:37:09

baby am equally symptom free, well apart from the imaginary sore nipples which aren't sore until I poke them to see if they're sore haha! I did have some weird lower abdo pain yesterday but think I'm over-analysing everything, was probably trapped wind blush... Had no symptoms whatsoever last time so hoping if I do catch this time I'll be horribly sick, sore and otherwise indisputably pregnant. FX for both of us indeed.

Anyone else joining us for a POAS party on or around the 12th? xxx

BettyFlutterbly Sat 03-Nov-12 19:41:19

Hi everyone.
Just wanted to check in and send lots of hugs and babydust to you all.
Af is due Weds but I'm not going to test and don't have any tests at home to tempt me. I've not been on here as I just got too obsessed and then too upset last month when af arrived.
If af doesn't come then I'll pop in and let you know and maybe there'll be a poas buddy or two around the end of next week.
Welcome to the newbies and I'm really sorry for your loss. I found that ttc straight away was the only thing that would help me to look forward. No luck yet but I'm only on second cycle after early mc in Sept. Good luck x

messtins Sat 03-Nov-12 21:26:16

Hello Kittybump (getting a bit confusing on here with kitty x 2 and james x 2) I'm really sorry for your loss and that you are having to keep going back - adding insult to injury.
I'm just checking in really as mumsnet has ceased to consider this a "thread I'm on" and I had to search for it. Nothing to report. In 2ww, AF due sometime around the 10th but not sure whether this will be a WTF cycle or not, think I ovulated about day 14 so we'll see.

KittyBump Sat 03-Nov-12 22:30:10

Hi all and thank you for kind words. Fingers crossed for all of you in the 2ww, I'll be so happy to hear some BFPs as it gives me hope smile I keep wondering if I should POAS - seems weird to hope for a BFN! I think it would still be positive at the moment though so I will stay away from the sticks.

BrieMonster Sun 04-Nov-12 08:44:27

Taking the plunge.. bear with me while I learn the ropes, abbreviations etc.

Had a MC in September and after the initial devastation I assumed I'd get pregnant straight away without even TRYING-trying. It doesn't help that I'm off sex altogether!! We have an 18 month old son, yet I long for even less sleep and more banana mashed into the carpet.
I'm trying to take it as it comes and not get too caught up in conceiving. But I can see myself breaking out the sticks and calendars whilst trying to appear nonchalant.

Good luck for those of you waiting to test, and thoughts/hugs/prayers/whatever helps to those of you dealing with MC just now. I was doing pretty well until Halloween which would have been my 12wk scan. I had so fallen in love with the plan that the pregnancy brought, and now it's all different.

Anyway, I look forward to hearing good news from you crowd!

Lolcbcblemonlime Sun 04-Nov-12 09:02:35

Hi Brie sorry you find yourself here. It's pretty heartbreaking and cruel - but we are a nice bunch!
I try and fail most of the time not to obsess too!

BrieMonster Sun 04-Nov-12 10:48:52

Thanks Lemonlime! Obviously I don't wish the experience on anyone.. but so nice to share and see how many people are in the same boat. Especially with regard to 'what not to say'! Even before it happened to me common sense meant I'd never try to belittle someone else's pain, which is what so many of those responses does.
I got over caring about that though and am being positive now!

BrieMonster Sun 04-Nov-12 10:52:47

Oh the irony.. as soon as I posted that I thought positive.. "positive positive positive" what movie is that from? And a minute later I realised. It was the annoying sister on Knocked Up!

Does anyone else have a clue what I'm on about?

messtins Sun 04-Nov-12 14:16:35

Nope, not a clue, but Brie you are v welcome anyway. I MC in September too, and would have been 16 weeks now. From last time I MC I know that I was hyper aware of what stage I would have been at until my EDD, it got a little easier after that.
Hope some of this positivity results in some more positive tests very soon.

BrieMonster Sun 04-Nov-12 19:37:41

Thanks messtins.. So would be April for you then? Really hope by then you are well into a healthy happy pregnancy!

Hi Kittybump & BrieMonster.
Good luck Betty!

Hope everyone had a great weekend?

KittyBump Mon 05-Nov-12 13:08:35

Hello brie messtins lol and womancalledhorse not sure how to abbrev that! Hope all is good with everyone, I'm feeling a bit sad today - but trying to rationalise it as a hormone crash which would be a good thing! Positive positive positive smile

messtins Mon 05-Nov-12 13:27:01

Kittybump it's ok to be sad. I think it's healthier to give in to feeling sad and process the emotions a bit rather than bottling it up. I'm sure we are all still having good days and bad days along the way. This is one place you don't need to pretend to be positive if that's not how you are feeling.

HannahJayne Mon 05-Nov-12 15:06:17

Hello! Can I reserve a place for when all this is over? I miscarried on Saturday/Sunday at 5+5 so really very early. Guess we'll start trying again as soon as the bleeding's over. Was referred to the EPU this morning as GP wasn't sure whether it was threatened or actual, and have to go back on Wednesday to make sure the hcg levels are going down.

I just wanted to say thanks, as well. I was on holiday when the mc started, and threads like this one stopped me going into meltdown mode, got me through the flight, and got me home. So thank you. A lot xx

KittyBump Mon 05-Nov-12 15:14:03

Hi hannah sorry for your loss - must have been crap being away from home sad
messtins thanks for your message - I'm at work so don't want to be upset here - only my manager knows which is exactly the way I want it. Will allow myself to be sad at home, I probably have been bottling up so far sad

HannahJayne Mon 05-Nov-12 15:30:23

Kittybump the only useful advice my mum has given me is to talk about it. She had a mc before my brother was born 18 years ago and she bottled it up and has never really talked about it. Take care of yourself.

Yep, being away from home with no sanitary protection and no shops to buy anything wasn't best pleasant!

BraveLilBear Mon 05-Nov-12 15:37:42

Hi everyone <peeps head round corner> I'm so humbled reading back over this thread - everyone seems so contained despite all the craziness.

I had an early mc/cp at 5+2. Ironically on Oct 15th, which I later learned was international babyloss awareness day. First pregnancy. Never expected it - who does? Huge shock!

We're now TTC again, and I think I'm looking forward to POAS on Nov 18.

So hi to all the Kittys, James's, monsters, animals and tins... and everyone else. Happy hand-holding!

Kittybump, just let it all out, even if it's only on here & not in RL, I've been having a cry most nights this week, doesn't help that everything we're watching in the evening has featured a pregnant woman of some sorts!!

Welcome HannahJayne (I mc a few weeks ago, bled for 10 days so hope you've not got long left) & Brave, fingers crossed for your bfp on the 18th!

BraveLilBear Mon 05-Nov-12 16:43:51

Thanks for the welcome horse...

Sorry you're having a weepy week sad

I made the mortal error of watching Toy Story 3 again last night. My poor OH's t-shirt was soaking wet by the end. Which he found hilarious blush

Clairey2012 Mon 05-Nov-12 17:57:15

Hi Hannah and bravelilbear soooo sorry for your loss its sooo pants!!!!, I mc over a week ago and still feel rubbish, frustrated and jst wana cry 24/7. this is the best place to let it all out cos atleast everyone understands. I do keep wondering when am I actualy feel happy again cos i really hate feeling depressed, atleast the bleeding has stopped. Gona try and persuade the hubby to ttc every night just to put a smile on my face, dnt rekon he'l go for it though.lol xx

Clairey2012 Mon 05-Nov-12 19:25:39

Oh can I just ask, has any1 else experienced really sore boobs, mine are killing me and the lower part of my back was really aching last night, its like pregnancy symptoms all over again!

EchoAlone Mon 05-Nov-12 21:04:17

Hello! I am TTC after MC in August- had 2 WTF cycles since. The past few days I feel definite twinges/ cramps on lower right side, so I really want to think this is a good sign (although I think sore boobs and lower back pain are a REALLY good sign, Clairey) but fear that maybe it may be something else- I got sick of going to the EPU to have HCG tested, and just stopped going, without having a final scan to confirm all RPOC had gone. Do you think that it is better to think positively and visualise happy outcomes, or less stressful not to build up hopes? My hopes are high, but fear my chances are low...

Clairey2012 Mon 05-Nov-12 21:16:12

It's prob jst my hormones like still in my system afta mc Bt keep hoping docs made a mistake n I dreamt th whole mc. High hopes for u echo, u never know what mote b around th corner. Xxx

KittyBump Mon 05-Nov-12 22:53:35

Hi echo and clairey - when are you testing echo ? fingers crossed for you x
clairey no sore boobs or back here but I didn't have them when I was pg either so I'm not much help smile
I'm interested in you all having HCG tests, I've not had one - do you have them if they aren't sure if you are miscarrying or not? I've now been miscarrying for 3 weeks and 2 days! No wonder I am knackered - Surely I will just run out of blood soon?

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 08:39:07

Hey kittybump. Yeh I had an hgc test as soon as I went to hospital n then had to go bak 24hrs later n my hormone had dropped to 900. Im suprised they didnt do one.im wondering wen to test again to get a negative results so I know th hgc is out my system n I can start again. My last test was last mon.xxx

EchoAlone Tue 06-Nov-12 09:22:00

Yes, same as Clairey- I had the hcg tested while I was in EPU, bleeding heavily- it is a blood test- then I had to go back 24 hours later, (big drop in hcg levels confirmed MC), then go back again 1 week later, then was supposed to go again one week later, but was fed up of sitting waiting with all the happy bumps, so I bought the most expensive HPT I could and tested myself till "not pregnant" sad

Like Kitty, I also bled for around 3 weeks- literally draining your energy

Then I did a sneaky thing- my DH was scared of all the bleeding, and said not to TTC for a while, but he noticed all the time I have reading things on the Internet, so I told him that I read that I would be LESS fertile after an MC, as all my hormones were washed out, so we have not been "using protection" and DTD EOD when the ovulation calender on MN indicated that I was ov, eleven days ago. So I have a couple cheapo HPT calling out to be christened...

messtins Tue 06-Nov-12 09:50:37

Hi Hannah, Lilbear, Echo and Clairey. Getting busy on the thread! It's so pants that there are so many of us in the same boat, but at the same time nice to have some company. Hope you all get a BFP that sticks very soon.

BraveLilBear Tue 06-Nov-12 10:19:19

Hello Hannah, Echo and Clairey (nice name wink) sorry you're here too... Clairey sounds like there may be hormones still running around doing crazy things. Fx you get a BFN soon so you're back to day one, as it were.

KittyBump Tue 06-Nov-12 11:04:59

Hiya bear sorry I think I missed you before smile very sneaky echo my DH really wants to ttc ASAP and I'm not sure, well I really want to but a bit scared that rushing will mean another mc sad I know there is no evidence for this. Also I've convinced myself I have a thyroid problem as I'm constantly freezing, tired and clumsy - but this is probably due to the mc

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 06-Nov-12 12:35:13

Oh god I feel like I'm living in a nightmare at the moment sad.
One of my best friends (only 24) had been with her boyfriend for just a year when he suddenly dumped her last week. Then yesterday we found out she is 5 weeks pregnant despite being on the pill (doc told her those fuckers are only 92%effective?!)
So now I have to be a good friend to her and support her through a termination. She keeps apologising to me and saying sorry and I'm really worried about her. But my own heart is in pieces with the unfairness of it all.
Sorry it's a selfish post. Feel crap!

BraveLilBear Tue 06-Nov-12 12:40:13

God lol what a nightmare sad

Sorry for your situation. I can't honestly think of much worse when you feel like you're fighting mother nature and she's loving someone else who doesn't want it.

Thinking of you thanks

((*Lol*)), you're an excellent friend for still being there for her, given your circumstances.

MIL has told the entire world about my MC. Even though we told her not to. She doesn't get to find out next time I'm pregnant until it's obvious. Or I have a baby grin

Echo, I can't decide which is best!
Personally I can't not build up my own hopes (every twinge around AF due has me thinking oooh this is our month), but then I hate myself for being an idiot and thinking xyz is def a pg symptom.
I guess the most positive thing I can think is; by this time next year I WILL be pregnant again, because that's 12 months away, I'm bound to get pg before then? Right.
Good luck for when you do poas.

Brave, I worked in a cinema when Toy Story 3 came out...the amount of women who'd come out tears streaming down their face. I always gave them a 'I know, I bawled too' look!

messtins Tue 06-Nov-12 13:29:42

Lol that must be awful for both of you. Don't take on more than you can handle, I'm sure there are other people who can help support your friend and it must be really tough when all you want is to be pregnant and all she wants is not to be. sad

BraveLilBear Tue 06-Nov-12 13:32:02

Horse woah to the MIL! Maybe that's her way of dealing with it - but still, that surely has to be added to the file of bad MIL moments.

I like your plan for revenge though grin - is it bad that I'm thinking that way about telling anyone when I get pregnant, just in case??

Don't beat yourself up over symptom spotting - tis only natural. That's what I'm telling myself and I'm only 2dpo!

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 13:37:49

I feel kind of refreshed today n raring to go n get pregnant asap. Has anyone used those ovulation sticks b4? Iv heard that I shud think of my mc as a period n shud ovulate again soon. Wel I hope anyway. Wud any1 recomend them cos cant b bothered measuring my temp.x

SallysTrying Tue 06-Nov-12 13:52:07

Hi ladies, can I join? I'm currently in the middle of my first 2ww after having a missed mc at 13 weeks in September, and desperately symptom spotting...

Hi guys, sorry to see so many new faces! But hi smile

My bleeding is finally calming down, after the world fell out of my bits over the weekend hmm I'm so relieved it's over and I'm getting back to normal.

I been having bit of a wobble since the mc, wondering if we should ttc again, or whether it was a sign that we weren't meant to have a 3rd dc. It was a bit of an ordeal really and I just don't ever want to go through it again, but I suppose you have to take that risk if you want to have a chance at another baby. I've got to check my hcg levels when the bleeding stops so I've ordered a few internet cheapy tests (and some ov tests too) so we have the option of trying again if we feel like it. We probably will, but it'll be a nerve wracking, bum clenching 9 months if we're successful.

Talking to people about the mc is weird, they either already know so they don't ask, or you get a "you ok?" but you know they don't really want to talk about it so you just say "fine thanks!"

I spoke about it this morning to one friend who I thought I could talk to as we've spoken about heavy periods and stuff before. I didn't give graphic detail, just said that I'd lost so much blood over the weekend I nearly fainted yesterday, and she said "ugh I feel sick just listening to you" - and then changed the subject. Thanks for dismissing me! hmm

Clairey I've used the ov sticks twice before, got pregnant the first month of trying both times, so I would recommend them.

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 14:21:14

Hi sally, welcome. Sorry to find ya in th mc club. Were all willing each otha on here even though were all at different times afta mc. Xxx

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 15:01:11

That sounds awful james...... Im glad it had stopped now, mine wernt as half as bad. That friend doesnt sound very supportive bt atleadt u got us lot to share with. Mite giv th ov sticks a go then.im dure ul know for def soon enuf if you want to try again. Good luck and big hugs.xxx

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 15:05:33

Jst done a pregnancy test to see if all th hormones hav left my system n it came bak negative, weirdly I wasnt upset, rekon its cos I know for defo that I can properly start trying again. Goin to th shop soon to buy ov sticks. X

BraveLilBear Tue 06-Nov-12 15:16:54

Glad that you're feeling positive about the negative (as it were) Clairey.

Good that you're feeling better, too James I think it's perfectly normal to have a wobble - I had a major wobble after mine, was terrified of possibly losing another and didn't think I could cope with it.

But after seeing the doctor and he reassured me that it was nothing I'd done or not done etc, I finally started picking up. Now I'm drumming my fingers impatiently at 2dpo... grin

Point is, you'll know when and if you feel ready.

Hi Sally. Sorry to see you here but come on in - I'm a few days behind you in the 2ww but cheering on all those ahead!

MunchinMango Tue 06-Nov-12 16:44:13

Hiya ladies, just checking in as its been awhile since I last posted.

Wow sorry to see so many new ladies joining but a big hello to you all and this is certainly a great place for help and motivation.

Hello also to everyone else, where are you all at now? Maybe we should start another stats thread????

Well i stayed away for a bit as i just felt so helpless and frustrated as I hadn't a clue where I was cycle wise. So I'm happy to say AF has arrived today after 55 days. So here's to a new cycle and hope of a bfp for us all.

messtins Tue 06-Nov-12 16:48:46

Hi Sally I'm also in 2ww - quite a few of us expecting either AF or a BFP in the next week or so....fingers crossed for lots of positive tests this month!

James I'm glad your bleeding is settling down. Can completely relate to your thoughts about whether to try again. We have 2 DSs. I MC in between them and never even considered not trying again even though the MC was traumatic. I was so sure that DS1 was not meant to be an only child. Much less sure this time after MC trying for DC3. It was a big decision for us whether to go for 3 anyway and I do sometimes feel we are being greedy or pushing our luck. I really, really do not want to MC for a third time. Time is not on my side as I'm nearly 38 so I can't really have a break and see how I feel, we just have to go for it. If I MC again I think that will be game over for us though, I can't keep putting myself and the family through it.

messtins Tue 06-Nov-12 16:49:57

Mango yay for CD1 eventually! Good luck for this cycle.

That's exactly how I feel messtins, like we are maybe pushing our luck to want a third. Especially as when we announced the 3rd pregnancy certain people were less than thrilled and commiserated with us like "worse things have happened at sea" and we were like "er... it was planned, but thanks" hmm

Fingers crossed for all of you in the 2ww! Gosh Mango, 55 days? I didn't realise it could take so long to return to normal.

MunchinMango Tue 06-Nov-12 17:00:34

Thanks messtins. You have just totally summed up our situation also re decision for ttc dc3 or not. Really felt after mc that it was because we were pushing our luck also as I'm 40 time not on our side. I feel we will only try for another few months before calling time so gonna give it our best shot. Fx for us all.

MunchinMango Tue 06-Nov-12 17:05:30

X posts. Hiya James I know how you feel I felt people were thinking we were crazy when we told them we were pg. yes my cycles have been off the wall since I mc. My cycles have been 103days, 36days and now 55 days. I'm sure I'm more the extreme than the norm and I constantly wonder if time has run out. But really hoping the wtf cycles are at an end now.

Good luck to you for this month.

woollywomble Tue 06-Nov-12 17:23:38

In the same boat as messtins and MunchinMAngo - Mc last month what would have been DC3. I'm 41 so even older than both of you and feel time is running out, but equally if I were to fall pregnant next cycle (big hypothetical if) then there's a good chance that I would be due just as my eldest is about to sit her 11+ exam and I'm really worried I'm being selfish and jeopardising her future. Can't decide whether to wait just a little longer or throw caution to the wind...

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 06-Nov-12 17:57:00

Thanks for your kind words. She went to doc and has been told its all very simple and she needs to take some pills which will make her miscarry. She is terrified. It's awful but I will stand by her and help her. She was the person who helped me the most when I miscarried so I feel I owe it to her.
Hope everyone else feeling ok. Sorry to see new faces!

HannahJayne Tue 06-Nov-12 18:07:03

Clairey did you get the OV sticks? We only DtD once last month on a smiley day and it worked - thought that was a bit good to be true. For some reason I'm expecting it to be much harder this time.

Are you just going to start testing every day? I have just about stopped bleeding. Back to EPU tomorrow for another hcg test. I know I should probably wait for a proper period but. I. Hate. Waiting.

Clairey2012 Tue 06-Nov-12 18:14:48

Hi yeh went n got sum ov tests, no smiley face, shud I test everyday or do u rekon every other day is ok? Yeh im th hannah im sooo impatient so jst wana get preg asap.xxx

Lolcbcblemonlime Tue 06-Nov-12 22:50:23

Yeah def test everyday with ov sticks or u might miss your surge.

HannahJayne Wed 07-Nov-12 12:59:16

Oh. Been back to the EPU again today and HCG is down to 5 so don't need to go back again. But, she did say we have to wait two months before trying again. This has floored me completely. For some reason thinking we could just try again straight away has taken my mind off it a bit. It made it less bad somehow. Keep calm and carry on and all that. My DH is a teacher so a baby in the summer holidays would have made a lot of sense. Oh well.

messtins Wed 07-Nov-12 13:16:58

Why did she say you have to wait? Often people are advised to wait until they've had one period, this is just to make any future pregnancy e