Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Recently graduated from the mosh pit? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake!

(1000 Posts)
MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 13:20:32

Continuation of the last thread.

There's cake for scoffing, backs for patting, and screeching death metal for all your metalling moments. All welcome so come on in and get settled into the plush sofas!

<Metalling: the term 'metalling' was coined after a typo, ie the art of 'mentalling' in that one gets all mental and in a head fuck with the slightest of symptom of, well, anything.>

<Mosh pit: Metalling of course gave rise to the mosh pit, where we all dive into when we start, well, metalling>

So settle into the mosh pit, we have special VIP area's for those on the 2WW, the new bumps metalling with segregated areas for the first/second/third trimesters and the club class cocktail bar for those who have just got AF and can get-pissed let loose for the first two weeks!

And we have a recently refurbished Mosh Pit Nursery for the graduates IQ Manda and Blue, we are currently running a rota for babysitting so those three can go and get-pissed have some rest! I have done my bit this week so i need the next volunteer!

MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 13:21:06

Marking spot, like a territorial dog <cocks leg> I may be a grad now but you cannae get rid of me that easily!

Lovely to see marathon pop in grin

goth many of us will recognise those feelings you are having - particularly the doom-y 'well, that was my chance and it's all cocked up so it's all over for me now' feeling. All I will say is that it's NORMAL and look at how many bumps/grads we have here despite us having those thoughts too. Don't deny your sadness and/or anger - a loss can be so devastating... but DO try not to wallow in the negativity. You did get pregnant. You WILL get pregnant again.

I haven't got time for my usual essays on high dose b-vits (thanks jaffa for stepping in wink ) but I will say as much as preconception vits are good in and of themselves, you won't necessarily get the same effect as when you take the high dose b vits. You can certainly take them both together.

mumtum <squeeze> I hope you get some answers re: your appointment. Perhaps they had booked it with one of the registrars rather than the actual consultant so...something <clutches at straws>.

Midwife came today and in theory was gonna discharge us as day 10, but he hasn't quite made back his birthweight yet (lost 200g by day 5 and has put 100g back on by today) and is still kinda jaundiced. I'm not too worried...

MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 13:38:59

<steps in with disinfectant spray to get rid of mandas doggy do>

nooo manda dont worry too much (although your ratio of kids to mine at 4:1 is pretty impressive so i need tell you nothing!) he seems to be gaining his weight albeit gradually, i think DS had a similar thing but he is a right porker now grin how are the rest of your brood?

JaffaSnaffle Mon 28-May-12 14:42:07

Hello hello, what's going on here then?

Marking place on thread.

PieMistress Mon 28-May-12 14:43:34

<marks place>

mumtum I took B6 through conception and all of the first trimester. I was convinced the reason I miscarried was because of low progesterone and had read that it can help boost your natural levels. I was taking 50mg of B6 in addition to the 10mg that are in the conception/pregnancy multi-vits. I did swither about taking it in 1st tri and all the reading I did said it was okay up to 100mg (as it's also recommended to help with morning sickness and doctors prescribe up to 75mg a day).

manda are you divulging your DS's name or keeping it off mumsnet? I'm just a nosy old bird! x

leedy Mon 28-May-12 14:47:31

Ooh, look at this shiny new thread!

MumTumWanted Mon 28-May-12 15:34:45

Lovely new thread ladies

B bits I think I will take them but I've been referred to the rmc now so will these affect this ?! Any advice gratefully absorbed...... Also I have pernicious anaemia which means my body does not naturally absorb vit b12 from food like most people so bj monthly u have to have a blood test to asses my level and then a b12 shot .... Wonder if this hasn't helped ?????

MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 15:40:49

indeed leedy

<runs around like a Stepford Wife polishing new shiny thread - places mat at the door and a sign telling you to remove your shoes grin>

<hands jaffa some rubber gloves and bleach - neve mind admiring the gaff - give us a hand wink>

i just had to tell someone at work! someone i hardly know but she is a solicitor sorting out a hearing and wants me to exhibit something and be a potential witness at the hearing, it is prob going to be Jan/Feb 2013 shock I tentatively told her and said that she is honoured to be the first to know and she has to keep her gob shut! grin thankfully she is v nice and said she would do what she can to get the hearing in early, poss before LO is born. But also said if she could let me out of doing it then she would try her best.

Feeling sicky today. Also me and DH cheated the system a bit on Friday blush i told the MW that my LMP was 14 April and not 16 April - i only did this as my cycles are short and i wanted to bump it along a couple of days blush blush also DS was dated about 5 days earlier than my LMP stats. this of course led to serious metalling when i went for my scan as i was in the system as being 5+6 rather than 5+4 and i worried that the sonographer would say my bean was too small and that i had a MMC...

<wafts fan>

aaanyway, if you all followed that without getting bored - i am going with it so today by my new calcs i am 6+2 (or 6 if you are a pedant) grin

Thank god for this thread, only you lot will know what i mean by all that!

PieMistress Mon 28-May-12 15:52:15

martha I did something similar because I normally ovulate late and know that they tend to dismiss this when you tell them!

However my 12w scan brought my due date forward by a whole 7 days (which i'm still perplexed about as know I didn't ovulate on CD7!) and my section is booked for 39 weeks (by due date) which is only 38 weeks by my LMP (and even then I know I didn't ovulate on CD14, it was more like CD17!). Ho Hum! I talked to the consultant and said I was concerned the baby would be coming too early but she said they do sections at 39w to capture this (as aim not to do them before 38w due to lung development or something). So it means less than 4 weeks to go?! Eh, how did that happen!!

Sorry for the waffle!

Are you going to go for another early scan?

mumtum I don't think B vits will affect any tests you have done at the RMC? From what i've read your B6 and B12 levels should be even (if that makes sense)?

Woah it's soooo shiny and NEW! grin

All is good here, I'm just marking my place. smile

Oooooh a new thread!! <grabs a seat in the cocktail bar>

Hi everyone, sorry for the long absence. Been all over the place emotionally over the past couple of months. AF just arrived today for the first time since MC at the beginning of March hmm Now have to decide whether to start my last round of Clomid tomorrow or wait til I'm in a slightly better place (things are a little up in the air, with a school place appeal for DS2 approaching - he didn't get into the school his brother attends. And also redundancies are coming at DH's work, so we're nervous about that, even though it's fairly unlikely he'll get the axe).

Anyway, I'm ashamed to say I haven't kept up with everyone's progress since I posted on the last thread so hopefully I'll do better this time blush

ConfusedMumDotCom Mon 28-May-12 16:43:47

Just marking my place. Will read through the thread when I get home tonight.

GrandPoohBah Mon 28-May-12 16:46:29

<pulls up a chair>

New thread, hurrah! I had another scan today as I was offered one at the hospital I changed my care to, and clearly wasn't going to turn it down! Baby is still doing headstands and wriggling about, so all is well. I did turn down the NT test this time as I didn't want to waste NHS resources, having had one already and the baby was moving so much it would have taken FOREVER again. They've moved me further back, new EDD is 30th November but they also admitted that they couldn't get a decent CRL measurement as it kept moving.

Today I am tired and sicky. I may retire to the sofa.

icequeenkate Mon 28-May-12 16:53:42

<marks place>
<and officially adds self to stats thread>

martha totally understand the ever so slight manipulation of LMP dates... may have done the same myself, so my ddate is actually my birthday. That way am bound to miss it, so we don't have 2 birthdays on the same day. grin well, that's my logic anyway.

approaching timings of my last mc. Will be pleased to get past 5+4 which is when it all began. Currently 5+2 (or 5 for the pendants wink)

goth - sorry to meet you in such circumstances, but as manda says many of us have had similar feelings of it being too late and have been surprised and thrilled again. Good luck with the roller coaster of emotions. I've found reading this thread (rarely posting tho) has been a massive support and source of information.

<lays down freshly baked cupcakes, in jubilee paper cases, with london buses on top as decoration> Time for brew

MrsPear Mon 28-May-12 16:59:40

Hello! OOO new thread (marks a spot)

Today i am tired and hot. Also had a flap this morning as DS woke up with spots on his face (plus the spots he already has around his willy). It is the heat not chickenpox. Even if it was chickenpox i am safe apparently.

Hope is everyone is as well as can be expected. Martha can i just say you sound allot less metalling than i am - can you please pass me some optimism?! I have bottled out of having the scan again; DH said well in 3 weeks time you going to have one even i have to drag you there kicking and screaming DS style. blush

MrsPear Mon 28-May-12 17:01:04

(oh and hands round some scotch eggs as i have been eating far too many!)

MissCoffeeNWine Mon 28-May-12 17:19:13

Oooh shiney. This is my fourth thread? Or fifth? I joined the metallers last October!

I manipulated my date for this one a little bit as well (only 2 days I think) and then had a load of early scans as you know which all gree and which moved the date up even further than I'd guessed. LMP would have been about a week out.

MrsPear DD had full chickenpox whilst I've been pg with this LO. I'm fine.

I get my last fanjocam this week and I will ask about fluid levels. Metalling about fluid levels and loss in the heat sure I'm just a sweaty betty blush

Missgiraffe1 Mon 28-May-12 17:44:49

Hello!! Not been stalking you all, honest. Had been in touch with blue on another thread and thought I'd check out this one to see whether miniblue had put in his/her appearance yet
Congrats to IQ, Manda Blue and Marathon on the arrival of your precious LOs smile
And Martha !! So pleased for you! And Pie too? Fabulous!
It's so lovely to hear all this good news.
My lovely little DS, Ruairidh, is snoring away beside me. Born 4th May after relatively easy 5hr 15 min labour. Birth weight 7lb 14oz, now 9lb 11. He's a wee grubber! And a total joy of course.

Hope you are all well, and best wishes to all the other TTCers - this did indeed turn out to be a lucky mosh pit thread smile

ConfusedMumDotCom Mon 28-May-12 19:08:12

Evening ladies. Looovely new thread grin

I'm having a bit of a wobble. I'm meeting an NCT friend for dinner on Thursday. I'm really looking forward to it, but she's pg and due around the same time as I was. She knows about the mc. I've been ok with random pg ladies, but am feeling a bit envy about my friend. She's not the only one in my NCT group who is pg, just the first I'll have seen since the mc. I'm sure Thursday will be lovely, but am feeling a bit sad about it all. (Still no AF, still holding out from POAS again)

Sorry for the moan, but thought you'd understand.

Boris and mumtum I hope you are both doing ok. Goth I totally understand how you feel. The realisation that I've had an mc totally catches me by surprise when I least expect it. Hello to everyone else I haven't name checked.

<Checks in and lays out freshly made strawberry cupcakes, and loads of calipos, twisters and fab ice lollies>

PieMistress Mon 28-May-12 19:49:21

missg Congrats on the safe arrival of your DS! I love the name, it's actually on our list of possibles, but the other spelling! Three boys, two girls so far! I hope all is well, I still chuckle over your 'kitchen' talk grin I've got 3.5 weeks to go! Bricking it!

Is there a place on the stats for arriving babies?

Waves to all as I tuck into a bag of bite sized wisps pieces x

Hello everyone!! Can't believe how quickly the new thread is trucking along already shock grin
You guys are defo my new support network; who needs RL when you've just had a MC?!
goth - I totally understand how you feel, but really truly this is NOT last chance saloon for you, I keep being told by the medical profession that people are having babies later and later these days. And I also keep hearing that just after you've MC'd is the BEST time to fall preggo as you're at your most fertile. That's the main thing that's keeping me cheery deluded , thinking being certain that it will happen again in the next couple of months if not weeks. I may start to get down about it again if that doesn't happen but you've got to take any positives you can get and if so many people keep saying it then it must be right eh?! I have high hopes for you, just try to keep the faith smile
Confused - yup, the ol' green eyed envy monster, know that feeling. I have 4 or 5 preggo ladies coming to my wedding on Saturday; all wives of my boyf's best pals from school. Have already been mentally practicing doing the "hi, how are you, what a lovely bump, sorry got to mingle" speech so that I don't stab them with the cake knife , but I know it's going to be hard. And don't floaty maternity dresses look so lovely? I should have been 13.5 weeks' preggo on Saturday and was going to announce it during the meal (boyf's family still don't know about the pregnancy/MC and I hope it stays that way), so hopefully I won't flip out on the day.
Boris & mumtum - hope you're both OK?

Jollyb Mon 28-May-12 20:56:17

Hi all. Glad to have found the new thread. Sorry have been a bit quiet after my initial introduction myself - I'm in my 2WW which always makes me nervous. I'm on holiday in the middle of nowhere and so hopefully will be able to resist the temptation to test early. Hope you're all enjoying the sunshine

Evening ladies! I've been enjoying the sun, drinking beer and having lots of sex blush so not been on here much at all. How are you all doing? Today would have been my 12 week scan. Feeling sad, but every day is a day closer to being pregnant again right? smile

gothinrecovery Mon 28-May-12 22:23:39

Wow thanks so much for all the supportive messages - much appreciated.

I had heard about the enhanced fertility post mc thing, apparently this is genuine, must be all the hormones washing about or something. Going to see what happens anyhow and get on with things asap, the b vitamins must be worth a shot anyway. In the meantime just poured myself a big glass of wine. Going on holiday on Thursday so that can't hurt either. Work today was survivable, concentration not the best (and had a blub in the loo late on in the afternoon) but felt better to get on with things.

Good wishes to everyone on the thread.

kirrinIsland Mon 28-May-12 22:27:19

just checking quickly before diving in to bed - only a matter of time before DD wakes me up again.

Will catch up properly tomorrow....

InsomniaQueen Mon 28-May-12 22:48:26

Marking my place so I don't get left out!!! smile

Midgetm Mon 28-May-12 22:49:07

Sneaks in, eats a calipo and wees to mark my place.

MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 22:58:34

ladies just jumping on to say hi. i am off to my hometown tomorrow on a sad trip. My best friend has terminal cancer and i am going to basically say goodbye, she is in hospital and all treatment has failed sad sad

sorry to bring the thread down but if i am out of sorts the next few days then that is why.

oh but i couldnt go without giving MissGiraffe a big <squeeze> congratulations my lovely, <tentatively asks> how do you pronounce your son's name? I love it, is it Irish? We have missed you soooooo much on here. Glad to hear you have a little porker too (i had one of those!) smile keep in touch would ya? x

so glad to hear you are all with me on the 'manipulated Due Date' it has to be done!!

Waves to everyone - sorry for not name checking but sure you will all understand i am all sixes and sevens at the mo but sending the hugs to you all

MarthasHarbour Mon 28-May-12 22:58:59

midget you are a dirty tramp hmm

there - i have said it

fatasbutter Mon 28-May-12 23:48:12

<peeps in shyly and tentatively lays down a large bag of Munchies>

I've been lurking for ages, too shy to join as I'm so new to this Mumsnet thing - what a chatty bunch you all are! I hope you don't mind me butting in?! even though it's long past my bedtime

I'm currently on the 2ww (is agonising) and TTC #2 after a mmc in early march... It's so strange being so desperate for a BFP and yet so scared at the thought of it too!

I've realised that the only way to avoid repeatedly and inappropriately (ie 8 DPO!!!) POAS is to not have any sticks in the house at all!! There are two burning a hole in my bathroom cupboard and I don't know how long I can make them last!

Ps I love the name too missg - my baby has same but different spelling and it is the bestest name ever!

<yawns> goodnight all!

bonzo77 Mon 28-May-12 23:58:18

Marking my place. <quietly metalling in dark corner of mosh pit>.

Midgetm Tue 29-May-12 06:45:59

jeez marth that that is beyond shitty. I promise not to put any bodily fluids in the corner for a least a wee while see what I did there?. Such a difficult thing to even contemplate, let alone face. So so sorry. We are all here for you, in a virtual way but still a way that counts big time.

fats welcome to the mosh pit. Sorry you find yourself here but you are amongst fellow metallers who will look after you well. Personally I never resist. Well maybe till about 10 DPO if I can. I have got through more IC than I could count. Take the good advice of someone on here and hide them in the kitchen even I don't wee in the kitchen and wear white pyjamas.

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 07:14:27

Hi Fats welcome to the thread, sorry you have found yourself here. In my head it's only worth testing with your first pee of the day. So as one of my many complex test avoidance techniques, see hiding tests around the house and wearing white, I go to the bathroom as soon as I wake up. That way I have to wait at least 24hrs until the next opportunity. I'm holding out from testing again until at least tomorrow, but may try and move that back once I get there as I'm in the WTF cycle so have no idea what's going on. grin

POAS update: No AF, No POAS

WhyAlwaysBoris Tue 29-May-12 07:56:09

Thanks Martha for the new thread. I'm so sorry about your friend. Good luck with your trip today, it sounds very upsetting. I'm thinking of you.

possom, 'every day a day closer to a new pregnancy', that has really helped keep my spirits up, thanks

Butter, welcome, I'm so sorry you find yourself here. Good luck with the POAS and holding out till sensible o'clock. We have a triumvirate of lovely ladies in the TWW at the moment.

Now look, everyone, here was i all excited about our shiny new thread (and being a thread away from knickergate) and now there has already been talk of weeing. blush. Ladies. Behave.

PieMistress Tue 29-May-12 08:33:35

Sorry to hear about your friend martha, I remember you telling us about her before and the care package you were putting together. Big <hugs>, so sorry the outcome wasn't better xxxx

Martha so sorry to hear about your friend sad
fatasbutter welcome. I MCd in early March too. And I'm a serial POASer too. You'll feel right at home here!

Well I've bitten the bullet and restarted Clomid (plus a high dose B vit complex) this morning. Have horrible AF cramps. To my happy surprise I found out I had miscalculated and I have enough Clomid for this cycle and the next if this one doesn't work. Fingers crossed I won't need the second lot though eh (ever the optimist!!)

martha I am so so sorry to hear about your friend, i went through the same with my Grandma in late 2010, all ill say is nothing you want to say to her is silly, say it all. Take care xxxx

My scans tomorrow morning and feel like I'm going to throw up I'm so scared, I couldn't even swallow my folic acid without gagging a lot sad I don't want to go, because today I'm pregnant.

tedmundo Tue 29-May-12 09:49:44

Hi ladies, I am unlurking and hope you don't mind me joining in your thread.

I am also in the same position as fats and twolittlemonkeys that I had a mc in early march and am currently on 8dpo and gagging to test! I am off on hols on Saturday so will likely test on Sat morning with a FRER to see if I can have a boozy blowout or not.

state good luck at the scan tomorrow. How many weeks will you be by then?

martha I wish you well for what must be a very tricky visit. All the best to you and your friend.

Every time I think about peeing on that stick and waiting the 3 mins my brain goes a bit fuzzy and I breathe faster. is this the classic symptom of metalling??

JaffaSnaffle Tue 29-May-12 10:54:51

Welcome to all the new ladies. Hope all of you on 2ww can hold your nerve, and then get lovely BFPs.

Martha, I am so sorry about your friend - it is terribly sad news. I hope you have a special time with her. X

Well, I am having my 16 week scan after lunch. This, for me, is my last 'extra' appointment, so really feels like I am on the edge of normality. I know things can happen later than this, but that is sad knowledge of background risk, not my own experience... And I am not totally terrified after hb on Thurs, just hoping that they don't find abnormalities after the terrible Down's screening result... The Cvs was clear, but keep wondering if the bloods meant something sinister.

kirrinIsland Tue 29-May-12 11:40:19

Morning allsmile

Welcome to fats and Ted

martha so sorry about your friend sad

Jaffa good luck with the scan.

fatasbutter Tue 29-May-12 12:10:21

Thank you all for the warm welcome!

I cracked again this morning and got another BFN but it is WAY too early and I should know better! blush

state massive good luck for scan - thanks to mmc I know I will never enjoy the thought of going for another scan again beforehand, so I can guess how you are feeling...

Will be desperately trying not to test again til Friday (which is only just 4 days before AF is due) and only have one test in the house now...

<ties hands together, and then realises she cannot get to mumsnet...> wink

fatasbutter Tue 29-May-12 12:11:30

Ooh and good luck Jaffa too!

wilderumpus Tue 29-May-12 12:12:26

hey ladies, can i come and hide here with you all please? You all seem so kind and supportive and so I think I should come out of lurkdom and join in smile

I found my baby hadn't developed in March but wasn't allowed to mc until April when blighted ovum was finally diagnosed. Has been bloody hideous and have been getting anxiety attacks and nearly dropped out of uni (finishing PhD thesis in two months) but think I am starting to get back together again... Would love to have another bubba (have a DS, 2), but DH thinks i am too stressed and should wait sad I think trying again would help me be happier and look to the future... ho hum.

Congrats on the new babies, hurrah! And so very sorry to hear about your friend martha. My dear friend has only recently been diagnosed with cancer but she is getting very ill, very quickly. I am really scared and sad about this so really, really feel for you.

so, hello everyone smile

ps ice am not stalking you honest, have left the June ttc thread!

I wrote a long reply then HQ fecked off to the pub so the site went offline.

martha I am so so sorry to hear about your friend, I lost my Grandma to terminal cancer late 2010. All ill say is nothing is too stupid to say, say everything you ever wanted to to her. Take care xxx

I'll be 11+5 tomorrow ted I actually thought I was going to faint each time I've POAS and this time was the worst, so I did it and then went and made all the beds so I didn't have to hover in suspence.

So glad its not just me fatas I just want to cry go to bed and forget all about it. I'm just so scared. There's NO reason for it to happen again, and my symptoms are stronger but I can't shake the "why would it be ok" and the fear.

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 13:54:50

blooming iPhone I typed out a long post and it vanished. Grrr

Martha I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.

Right, this morning I went to the loo and there was a pink smear on the paper after I wiped. Oh I think, that's odd. However, since then, nothing. I have no idea what this means. If it is a prelude to AF, then it is one I have never had before. I don't think it is implantation as DH and I haven't DTD for 9 days - would that be too long ago? Aargh. This WTF cycle is berry well named.

(resigns myself to it being AF on its way)

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 13:55:46

Ah. The site was down!

(apologises to lovely iPhone)

squeakymac Tue 29-May-12 14:04:55

Hi all can I join puh-leeeese?!

Got a BFP a week ago after a MC at 6 weeks back in March, so quite quick thankfully and I realise we're really lucky it happened for us so soon. But I'm realising that I need some serious handholding for the next few weeks, am soooo nervous that things are going to go belly-up again especially as I enter week 6. I'm finding things really difficult especially the fluctuation in symptoms (that I know is totally normal but still can't help worrying when I've got no MS at all today!!).

So much more difficult when we're not telling any family / friends etc about new BFP - I find I'm still meeting people who are being so lovely to me after the MC and I feel really guilty I can't tell them 'well actually I'm pregnant again' evil guilt!!

Anyway after skimming your earlier threads I've realised these are all issues that you ladies are intimately familiar with....any advice gratefully appreciated and will do my best to return the favour (along with hand-holding and brew and biscuits as needed!)

squeakymac Tue 29-May-12 14:10:03

Oh and BTW nice to see some familiar faces in here icequeenkate and ted from the May / June threads! smile

wilderumpus Tue 29-May-12 14:18:51

such big good luck for tomorrow state and today jaffa. I can't wait to get pg but can't imagine what a headfuck scans will be sad BUT it is more likely to be fine than not... smile

confusedmum i never have spotting but did in my wtf month pre-af. started about day 9, hardly any though. Did hope was implantation - maybe for you it is?!

squeaky congrats on your BFP, yay for it being so quick smile Hope you ok, can't imagine how secretive you must feel!

JaffaSnaffle Tue 29-May-12 14:51:51

Hello, it's all good. Little baby girl Jaffa has grown, has lovely heart beating. Could even see her tiny ribs. I am so grateful, and so relieved. Keep crying, but in a good way.

tedmundo Tue 29-May-12 14:55:17

Bless you jaffa and bless the little lady too. glad it was such a lovely scan!

fatasbutter Tue 29-May-12 14:56:26

Oh enormous congrats Jaffa! What a relief it must be - now you can relax for 4 weeks and have a huge glass of wine juice! grin

wilderumpus Tue 29-May-12 15:02:26

yay! congratulations jaffa! how lovely! smile

Yes Jaffa! Chuffed to bits for you!

squeakymac Tue 29-May-12 15:30:45

Yay Jaffa well done on your little girl - 16 weeks!

martha so sorry to hear about your friend thats truly crap and kind of puts a lot into perspective....

I'm just a bit behind you and icequeen (date fixing withstanding!) can I ask you did you have much MS before 5 weeks? Did you have days with loads and days with none, or was it pretty constant?

PieMistress Tue 29-May-12 15:48:57

Great news jaffa xx

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 15:55:33

That's fab news jaffa grin

MumTumWanted Tue 29-May-12 16:35:00

Great news jaffa grin

Martha I'm so sorry what a sad situation I hope you make the very most of this precious time with your friend x

Wow lots of newbies I'm sorry that you have all had the need to join us but bundle in and settle down and have some wine and [tea] depending in where your at I can also highly recommend the club cocktails I've had a few myself this last week and really help blush. Wilderumpus well done wink

Manda how's the measles house ???

Boris and yikes how you both holding up ? I'm still pretty mixed up emotion wise bawling one minute then cope the next cos I have to physically I'm no longer I pain though do that's a blessing

Gp didn't get back to me about my appointment though so sad and angry that I've somewhat been left wondering will give it til Thursday before I phone again ......

Have a good afternoon all xxx

icequeenkate Tue 29-May-12 16:59:19

Hi wilde - fancy meeting you here!! wink grin

squeaky - I haven't been having any symptoms, hence my metalling. I had a spot of brown the day my AF was due, but nothing since. No sore boobs, no MS, no nothing. confused I am sure with my other pgs that MS had kicked in by now, but some wiser person than me has pointed out that all pregnancies are different. The only slight sign might be that I am snacking constantly due to lack of energy. In answer to your question - with my other pgs the symptoms changed depending on how tired I was and how physically active. I suspect that it's only if they disappear for a longer period of time that it might be of concern?

ted - hope this thread brings you luck too. There is an 'up the duff' chair I believe. martha - who did you pass it on to?! (martha so sorry to hear about your friend. horrid time for you and her family too.)

jaffa so pleased your scan was fab. How exciting to be excited by a scan iyswim? Am slightly nervous of scans too after the mc.

fatas - welcome, but step away from the sticks!!! Too early!! grin

yikes - getting hitched on Saturday!!! Very exciting - hope all sorted and ready for you. Am sending an anti-rain request for you now...

mumtum glad to hear that you are coping with the roller coaster emotions. it's such a ghastly time. Good for you - wine and cocktails.

<Marks place for latersmile>

Poppyjen Tue 29-May-12 17:10:27

<waves> marking place smile

gothinrecovery Tue 29-May-12 20:01:14

Jaffa - great news re the scan. State - good luck for tomorrow, fingers firmly crossed.

So sorry to hear about your friend Martha.

Well I'm officially in the WTF cycle now as the bleeding seems to have finally stopped (sorry TMI) so feeling better physically although head is still all over the place.

Brilliant news jaffa smile

I've managed to really hurt my back sad I've had niggles every morning for around a week but today woke up fine, spent the morning on my feet sat down for 10mins and couldn't get up, made the mistake of falling asleep on the sofa and been in agony since unless I lie down in a certain posistion, its up high around my bra strap, right hand side back of ribs, when I stand up I can't stop gagging?

Any advice?

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 20:31:59

I'm beginning to think that AF is on the way sad.

Jollyb Tue 29-May-12 20:43:19

Evening all. Had a lovely day on the beach and eating cream teas and have barely thought about TTC/2ww at all. I bet I'll be going crazy by the weekend though - I've a stash of Internet cheapie sticks waiting for me back home.

Fantastic news on the scan Jaffa. Hello fatas and Tedmundo - It seems there are a few of us here who had losses in early March. Let's hope the summer is a bit kinder to us.

Martha - hoping your trip to see your friend goes ok.

Jollyb Tue 29-May-12 20:46:45

Sorry posted too early. Squeaky- I didn't have any morning sickness until about 8 weeks when pregnant with my daughter- but I went off coffee way before that. I think it's quite rare to feel sick before 5 weeks.

Hope that helps x

fatasbutter Tue 29-May-12 21:24:36

Confused I feel the same sad - I always start getting low back pain about a week before I'm due on, and it started this evening angry

Oh well, we shall see...

State perhaps you have pulled a muscle and it's gone into spasm? Can be agonising and of course you can't take much to help except paracetamol of course - can you get DH to massage/rub it better??!

hi ladiessmile
jaffa lovely scan news smile
hope everyone is ok.

welcome to the newcomers! so sorry you have reason to join but i am sure you will find what you need here, whether that is advice, comfort or some chit chat to talk over the metally hours smile

i had a lovely birthday!! im currently posting on my brand new tablet PC!! i was spoilt rotten by everyone!! <<offers big chunks of chocolate fudge birthday cake>>

MarthasHarbour Tue 29-May-12 22:08:01

<marks spot>

i am too drained to catch up on the thread, suffice to say that today was sad but we both feel kind of calm now we know that the end is near IYSWIM hmm i love her so much and i had the opportunity to tell her, we dont all get that opportunity so i feel kind of blessed. she has been a wonderful friend over the last 21 years and i will always miss her.

thank you all so much for your support and hand holding, needless to say DH had a cheeky glass of wine ready for my return, i figured that bean would be ok on one glass wink

oh and my friend was over the moon about my news, i told her as i always promised she would be the first to know.

i will shake myself off and come back tomorrow, and will try and do a name check or catch up.

thanks again ladies xx

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 22:32:26

For some reason you're not supposed to hug on MN (I've no idea why). But sod it. <giant bear hug for martha>

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 29-May-12 22:47:42

AF is officially here.

I am surprisingly ok with this. AF arrived exactly 28 days from my mc. (I'm a bit sad, but didn't expect to fall pg straight away - although I did hope). I know from reading this thread that this is relatively quick and others have waited much longer for AF to return. My body seems to have snapped back into my regular cycle length and this is can only a positive thing.

Goes off to buy vitamin b to add to pregnacare and vitamin d supplements.

However, by my calculations I will be ovulating around the weekend of the 9/10th June when we are staying with some NCT friends who've moved out of town. I'm not sure about the layout of their new house, but let's hope the guest room is somewhere secluded blush. Though I'm sure they'll understand as she is due with DC2 around the time I was and knows about the mc...

Another bonus is that I can really enjoy the bank holiday weekend by drinking lots of wine and eating mouldy cheese. grin

backs improved slightly after a bath and some pottering about, i just feel so sick and tearful, im actually terrified of tomorrows scan.

<bustles in and hugs with confused and martha>

(((martha and confused))) big hugs x

fatasbutter Tue 29-May-12 23:18:02

Good Lord - I have eaten so much food I look as though I'm at least 16 weeks preggo ... does that count?!?! hmm

<rubs swollen belly smugly>

kirrinIsland Tue 29-May-12 23:47:20

Congrats on the lovely scam Jaffa

kirrinIsland Tue 29-May-12 23:48:18

*scan - obviously! I'm not accusing you of anything smile

ConfusedMumDotCom Wed 30-May-12 06:51:32

Good luck today Stateofconfusion ((hugs))

JaffaSnaffle Wed 30-May-12 07:17:42

State, good luck today. I hope it all goes well for you. X

fatasbutter Wed 30-May-12 07:38:24

Good luck State today x

MumTumWanted Wed 30-May-12 08:41:25

Good luck with your scan today state xxxx

kirrinIsland Wed 30-May-12 10:18:47

Goodluck state

Hope all goes well state

InsomniaQueen Wed 30-May-12 10:36:24

sending big hugs out to you Martha what sad news, so glad you were able to say a proper goodbye! Xx

Jaffa so pleased your scan was all fine. grin

Good luck for your scan today State.

Sorry AF got you confused - fingers crossed for next time but I like the wine and mouldy cheese attitude.

Good to hear from marathon and MissG

Love to all

wilderumpus Wed 30-May-12 10:55:16

good luck for the scan today state.

confused do you have any ambivalence toward conceiving again so quickly after the mc? I only ask because i really, really want to get pg asap but feel a bit fragile still from the mc and think people might worry I would be pg and depressed still. hmmm. Anyway, if I am in this month I am due to ov on the 11th which makes us pretty much cycle buddies (only if you want to be of course!) I wouldn't test until i am about 6 months late (though I am addicted to POAS so... !) smile

Did anyone here conceive v quickly after the mc and were you 'over' the mc mentally and emotionally when you did get pg, or sort of seeing what happened? Did getting pg help you out the past in the past?

TIA smile

Well I'm officially pregnant, EDD has changed from 13/12 to 20/12. So I'm 10+6wks.

Very wriggly baby and lovely heartbeat, got another scan on 14/6/12

squeakymac Wed 30-May-12 11:35:19

Ooh well done state so reassuring! And was just reading some stats about risk of recurrent MC depending on what week you are and after 10 weeks its essentially nil - roll on 10 weeks only 5 to go!

I can't book in with an obs person yet as we're moving in a month, so booked a private scan for when I'll be just over 8 weeks. Seems like an age away!

wilde I think its really individual. We didn't 'not' TTC the month after the MC but I do think that I would have been a nervous wreck if it had happened straight away. I don't think actually being pregnant has got rid of any of my sadness about the MC yet sad, and is now added to by constant worry and metalling! But if age / time isn't on your side you're better off trying straight away as every month counts....according to my GP!

Midgetm Wed 30-May-12 11:38:11

State yay yay and thrice yay. That is gorgeous news and should stop the metalling for at least a week or so.

Wilde I got pregnant straight after a MC with DD and seemed to cope quite well Although with early bleeding I was convinced it was game over. (maybe selective memory). This time I got pregnant the first time I DTD after an EP and have been metalling all the always as probably not emotionally mended yet. The EP had more of an effect on me I think as it was physically more terrifying. Pregnancy after MC is always more tricky anyway as the innocence has gone.

I am still metalling now and I am 19 weeks. I am getting better but I am easily rattled!

martha special squeezes for you today lady.

wilderumpus Wed 30-May-12 11:47:08

state that is such lovely news! 10 weeks! smile I only joined the thread yesterday but have been lurking and am just so pleased for you.

thanks for sharing your experiences squeaky and midget. I know that it would never be the same... am very sad that I won't be able to have the same pregnancy experience as I did with DS (blissfully unaware - i didn't even know what a mmc was! A BFP meant you were pg, end of!) I think if I won't 'get over' the mc I suppose i need to learnt to live with it and make peace with it... i do feel another baby would be a new baby, not my mc baby... and this is better than I felt last week smile

guess it just will be scary and have to take the plunge! Am 33 and though that isn't too worrying i do want to have two more childers with a decent gap between. would love to ttc again, need to talk to DH methinks smile Thinking i can try again, and even get pg again (am convinced I'll never get pg again - why I don't know) does make me feel better. ho hum! life is tricksy.

Woohoo State! smile

Countmyblessings Wed 30-May-12 12:49:06

Hi can I join - I am waiting for the arrival of AF although as have had a eptopic and 1 tube removed have no clue when it will!
Sorry have not had chance to read but will do! Has anyone else had a ectopic recently and then gotten pregnant and all been well!!!!
Congrats to all who just overcome the fear of news at scan so glad for you that it was good news!!!!!! I also don't know how I will cope at another scan as and when the time comes!!!
Big wave to yikes and backwards ( was on dec thread with you both)

gothinrecovery Wed 30-May-12 13:05:24

That is great news State, glad to hear all is well.

I will be disappearing for a bit probably. Need to get head straight and am going on holiday tomorrow night for 10 days. Head is all over the place, I just want to be pregnant again, but at 43 I know mother nature is not on my side especially after 4 years of unexplained infertility previously. Also need to try not to obsess about it which will be difficult.

ConfusedMumDotCom Wed 30-May-12 13:07:08

Hoorah for state. So happy you've got a wriggler in there gringrin

Hi wilder. I'm always happy to have a cycle buddy. I have loads of POAS avoidance tricks which I'll be willing to share when the time comes. grin I think when I do get a BFP I'll be happy and scared, but it felt right for us to get straight back on the saddle (if you know what I mean). Everyone is different and I am still sad about the mc and loss of the future I thought I would have, but optimistic for the new future.

Waves to count! How are you doing?

leedy Wed 30-May-12 14:21:17

Oh, brilliant news on scans state and jaffa!

Thank you all, squeaky hearing that's blown away the last scrap of todays metalling and I'm grin <---looking like a loon.

Its the most wriggly scan I've had, ds and dd were nothing like that, little legs were all over the place, sonographer was lovely and said straight away I'm searching for the heartbeat but its moving around so much! And showed us straight away when she got it. I appreciated it all so much more since the mmc.

I just want to say thank you so much for all the support so far the messages of good luck this morning made dragging myself there that bit easier.

lovely news state smile

i have been VERY emotional today...found out that 2 friends are pregnant without trying so thats most of them now. i only have 1 non preg friend now and as happy as i am for them i feel like shouting ITS NOT YOUR TURN!!! ITS MY TURN NOW sad sad sad i have been TTC for 56 months now thats 4 years and 8 months one friend has had 2 babies in that time and announced her 3rd a few weeks ago. i hate my body today sad

fatasbutter Wed 30-May-12 15:52:34

Fantastic news State! Congratulations!

Oh Marbles that's so upsetting for you - it's so hard trying to be grin whilst also being envy for people. There were not less than FOUR friends pg within days of me when I had my mmc and although I'm not too envy now when I see their burgeoning bumps, I do get a stab of sadness now and again that I just suppress until I can't breathe! It will happen for us!

Only T minus 6 days til AF now and I am heading shamefacedly to buy some more sticks to wee on... Trying desperately but failing miserably to not let my hopes get to high... Couldn't someone invent a suspended animation tent for us 2ww-ers?!

MrsPear Wed 30-May-12 17:49:40

Jaffa and state huge congratulations on the scan results.

martha sending big hugs to you as i cannot even comprehend what you must be going through

confused sorry about AF - this will be your month

goth i hope you can somehow enjoy your holiday

Hello to others that i missed. And hello to the newbies - the ladies on here are lovely and it is good to know we have all been in that horrible place and therefore we all understand.

Brain is still not engaged. Still scared. Still not taking it in. Told poor DH i told him i am not going for the early scan again yesterday. Poor man is worried too (and pissed off with our doctors). He really though he was going to lose me in November, was i really that ill?! Oh well 3 weeks until 12 week scan. HELP!

wilderumpus Wed 30-May-12 18:09:03

aw marbles. It is so hard. I am still actively avoiding people who got pg and then whined about it on fb when I lost mine so can't imagine how you get on with it.

goth I hope you are ok. I hope you can have a nice holiday and take time to think if you need to, get shitfaced, and ignore it all if you want to, too. I hope we see you back soon.

state I do think you are so brave having your scan, but now you know and can hopefully relax a wee bit. mrs pear I can totally understand why you want to avoid it! I will probably have an early scan but will completely die of nerves and cry a LOT.

squeaky and midget i completely meant to congratulate you on your relative pregnancies! Hurrah! Am actually really enthused by how many preggo people there are here smile

confused thanks for the offer to share poas avoidance techniques. luckily I only have ONE piss stick in residence - no more shall be bought and no pissing on said stick shall take place until I am late, late, late!

Thanks wilder I can honestly say I've never been more scared of anything. Although the agony of needing to pee certainly helped distract me whilst I waited over 50minutes past my appointment time, I ended up doing half a wee and drinking some more, then I got sent to wee as my bladder was too full hmm

<Grabs marbles for a huge bear hug> I'm not good with words <offers strawberry and white belgian chocolate cake>

fatasbutter Wed 30-May-12 18:47:14

Forgot to ask Ted - what does FRER stand for??

Midgetm Wed 30-May-12 22:22:24

marbles I should be in bed but just wanted to say that your words struck a real chord with me. That's about how long it took me to conceive this time round. I honestly thought I wouldn't. I am just about to turn 41, lost count of my failed pregnancies and thought the last one was actually going to kill me. I hated my bloody wonky broken body that couldn't keep a pregnancy in it. And it is bastard unfair. But sometimes things work out just when You Least expect them. Anyway not sure what I am trying to say really. Except if there is hope for wonky old broken me, there is hope for us all. And to give you a hug without licking you.

JaffaSnaffle Wed 30-May-12 23:00:37

state, I am so pleased for you! Hurray for a lovely scan! And much sympathy over your poor bladder. I have been in a similar state in the waiting room and it is horrid!

wilderumpus, I have had 2 mc, and my reaction was quite different to each. After the first one, I could not face ttc at all, struggled to even face sex tbh. I was so fragile, I knew I needed space.

My next pregnancy was also sadly a mc. I was glad I had waited, because I had gathered my strength a bit. After that mc, my need to have a second child far outweighed my anxiety, ( which is not to say I wasn't absolutely terrified). I just needed to be pregnant. I was also struggling with being surrounded by bumps and newborns.

I was lucky enough to get pregnant straight after the mc, with no period in between. Mentally, it was the right thing, but physically it has been exhausting. I basically had a 22 week first trimester...8 weeks pg, few weeks of bleeding then 13 weeks this time round. But here I am, 17 week pregnant and very very glad to be in this position. Ttc is so hard because the timescales are so drawn out, month by month. I wad glad I was spared that.

kirrinIsland Wed 30-May-12 23:42:21

Brilliant news state

marbles it's so hard being aroungpd pregnant people sometimes isn't it? You want to be pleased for them, and you are, but the unfairness of it all is overwhelming sometimes sad

Welcome to the newbies smile

wild I desperately wanted to be pregnant again straight away after both my losses, and I did feel better once I was (though I also felt guilty about feeling better) but I think it varies so hugely from person to person that only you can make that decision. First time round I was forced to wait a few months before trying again, this time I had one af and then was pregnant again and it's definitely been easier to deal with, though my stress levels have been pretty high!


I am feeling a bit better todaysmile I don't have to pay much attention to all the preggo friends unless I go on Facebook as iv got a busy couple of weeks in my new job so I can put it out of my mind for a bit nowsmile

Hope everyone is having a good morningsmile

<lays out breakkie stuff and a big pot of brew>

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 09:48:03

hello everyone

found you all in our new home!

sorry to hear about your friend martha its sounds like an awful situation.

i rang liverpool yesterday to see if they had my referal that my consultant said she was sending last week. they didn't and said it will be about six weeks for an appointment once they recieve it. i rang my consultant secretary and she said she was just typing up the letters from last week so it will go by the end of the week wtf??

i have now got a private appt in a couple of weeks at liverpool. not sure what they are going to do really as i have already had most of the tests. raj rai recommended a couple of tests which i hadn't had but other than that i think they will just book me in for the hysteroscopy. i don't know how long that will take but i hope it's not too long as i want to ttc.

welcome to the newbies!

theres too many posts for me to go back sorry - i will catch up though!

wilderumpus Thu 31-May-12 11:09:44

Bloody hell state that sounds awful. i remember for my fist scan with DS my bladder was so full I couldn't hardly walk accross the car park, and needed to let about half of it out and was still told I had too much. Didn't have to wait though! That would have been a nightmare, you poor thing. (my next scans I never had a full enough bladder and got told off! I obviously peaked with the first one!)

Thank you for sharing your stories and for your advice on when to ttc. jaffa am sorry to hear you had two mcs, back to back, that must have been so hard. but you are preggo now, hurray! And congrats kirrin - how far along are you? I really want to ttc again but have felt guilty like I would be replacing my failed pg. Or pinnning too much on a new one. I spoke to DH about it last night and confessed I wanted to get back on it straight away. You guys made me realise that ttc again, and getting pg again, will always be scary after the mc but I need to get back on that horsey and hope for the best! I would rather spend my days planning out my ttc and pissing on opk sticks (am a control freak) than sitting around feeling sad about my very much wanted lost pregnancy. Am gonna get me another baybee (I hope... sometime...) smile

bah pebs. What a pain in the arse!

<adds loads of sausages and bacon and black pud and fried bread to marbles' array of brekky goodies. And filter coffee.> Am mildly hungover very tired.

wilderumpus Thu 31-May-12 11:10:58

fist?! first ja.

GrandPoohBah Thu 31-May-12 11:11:07

Yay jaffa and state for wriggly babies!

wilde, I had two MCs a couple of months apart and then fell pregnant straight away with this one after the second MC for which I had an ERPC. We sort of treated it as a 'bonus' pregnancy - as it had taken us 3 months each time to conceive, we hadn't expected it to be so fast and were working on the basis that if I had an early miscarriage again then we wouldn't be any further along time wise than we would anyway.

I think this has affected my ability to bond with it, and plan for the future. I just don't expect it to work out - I've had 3 miscarriages and no children, so I don't have any experience of a successful pregnancy. I can't see myself with a baby, because every time I've hoped for it, it hasn't worked out. I feel like my happiness is a bit tenuous at the moment - getting pregnant so fast did take some of the pain from the MCs away, but I know how easily it could come back.

DH has said that we should go and buy something this week to make it more real - I'm 14wks and there's no reason to think that we won't get a baby at the end of all this. I'm not convinced.

wilderumpus Thu 31-May-12 11:27:06

oh grand i'm sorry for your mc's, I can totally see why you are finding it hard to believe you might get a baby. Is this the furthest along you have been? I will be very jumpy with the next baby (if I get pg again! what a happy dream) and disbeleiving - there is a special something about having had a mmc that makes all early pregnancy a big Fucking Lie of positive tests and symptoms and bah, it's all bollocks ...<and calm>...

I can see why you are reticent to go and buy anything, and it won't necessarily make it any more real! With DS we bought a little hat after the 12 week scan and it just seemed silly in my house; after the 20 weeks can we bought some baby grows and it still all seemed silly even though i was getting kicks by then... and when he was born I was like wtf?! I have a baby?! Getting ready etc (did it all very late, was in denial!) felt like playing a part. So... even though the lack of belief is because of your mc's, it can also be a very normal?! Basically am trying to say that not 'bonding' or getting it just yet is ok. Hope that isn't patronising blush

GrandPoohBah Thu 31-May-12 12:05:52

No wilde, not patronising - reassuring smile

I'm the furthest I've been now - I had a spontaneous mc at 6 weeks, a blighted ovum which was diagnosed at 8 weeks (happened naturally at 9) and a MMC which was diagnosed at the 12wk scan but stopped developing at about 8.5 weeks, which I had an ERPC for.

I said I was going to get a baby blanket I'd seen and loved after a good 12 wk scan but I've still not got around to it...

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 12:43:48

wilde after my first mc i waited for the first af and then got pg on next cycle. it was very worrying but i was glad to be pg again. it is really worrying to be pg after mc but much better than not being pg.

i am a bit pissed off that i have to wait for tests and cannot let myself risk another pg without all the tests the nhs can offer. in a way i wish i could just risk it as i don't feel i had a proper chance to use my aspirin and heparin treatment last time.

have you ladies with 3 mc's already had all the tests or are you just risking it with a 4th pg?

i feel like i am the only one waiting for tests but i suppose i am posting on a ttc thread so thats probably why!

feeling a bit down today as dh was really pissed off with me for booking the private appointment without checking with him first - wtf?

grandpoohbah (I love your name)

I really want a fry up now.

Nothing to report just a question, last night I sat with my knees pulled up under my chin, and I could feel like fluid movement, it wasn't gas I know it wasn't, it there any chance it could have been baby related, I am only 11wks. But it was so weird like bubbly flutters.

wilderumpus Thu 31-May-12 12:51:44

grande maybe you should take the plunge with the blanket... buy it, stare at it, rub your tum then put it in a cupboard for occasional sneaky peaks smile Thinking Rules apply thusly: buying a baby blanket will not endanger your pregnancy; if it does go tits up (it won't) A baby of yours will have this blanket. Your mc experiences must have been awful, I just can't imagine sad But you are pg now hurray!

pebs you are right about it being worse not being pg. And what a pain having to wait for the tests to ttc. Do you have the aspirin and heparin at home? seeing as it is going to take so long could you not just sneakily try for one cycle? [ignorance emoticon, don't feel you have to explain] I was very down yesterday and was offered lots of cake and a brew. Here, have some too smile

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 13:18:05

thanks for the brew wilderumpus!

i could try as my consultant said i could just ring up if i get pg before my tests and have the heparin etc but i don't feel like i can. i would hate for something to go wrong again and i haven't had all the tests. i am just waiting for an op to see if there is anything wrong with my womb (scarring after erpcs) or any structural problems.

i was hoping raj rai was going to say just try again but he didn't. he advised me to wait for the op and not to get pg before. my consultant also advised the op.

i am too much of a goody goody to go against the advice. and if it went wrong again i would definatley need the op, as all blood etc have come back clear so far, and i would be waiting even longer for it.

my goal is to get a baby asap. i think waiting for this op could be my quickest way. if it is going to be like 6 months or something i probably will try again but hopefully it won't take that long.

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 13:21:28

sorry for being me me me but no one else to chat to really.

i have started bleeding again today. what the hell is wrong with me??

i am bleeding every week- two weeks at the moment. just spotting sometimes red sometimes brown. it's been going on since early feb now when i got pg and continued after mc.

i have a gp appt booked in a couple of weeks (the only one i could book in advance wtf!!) so i will tell them but don't know what they will do.

Oh pebs you poor thing, I know its not ideal but I've had to do it as our GP was as useless, but go to OOH on a weekend as I was seen imeadiatly instead on a two week wait.

grand I also want to buy something but I'm anxious, but I need to make it real, I was so prepared for the worst this is kinda shocking to me!

MrsPear Thu 31-May-12 13:40:11

Morning hope everyone is as well as can be

Pespop i think you should ask for a referral to a gynecologist straight away as that does sound right. I really hope you get the appointments soon so you can start a new chapter of ttc

Re buying stuff: with- DS (born at 30 weeks well then got terribly ill and we nearly lost him) i had to be told by the neonatal staff to buy stuff! I still remember the day before we took him home i struggled into the hospital with all these shopping bags. Oh and we had to borrow my sister's friends car seat as the one i ordered didn't come in time.

For this pregnancy i have a mental list already, just like with DS, i know that i won't be buying though.

On a positive note DH rubbed my tummy this morning and smiled. (followed by usual questions re pain, bleeding etc!)

wilderumpus Thu 31-May-12 14:10:44

pebs def get a referral asap? that's not right at all. two weeks to wait is ridiculous.

And it does sound like you should, indeed, wait to ttc and it's not being goody goody is just following good, consistent advice. And then you shall make a baby hurrah grin

GrandPoohBah Thu 31-May-12 14:50:13

Thank you state - it is because I am Lord High Everything Else in our household <mildly obscure Mikado reference...> grin

pebs, I was referred for the testing and then got pregnant - so I rang my consultant and got an emergency appointment to be rushed through, which he told me was the right thing to do <preens>. We had the testing and it came back with nothing conclusive, and so our consultant continued with 'hand holding', and fingers crossed it has done the job.

I might get the blanket, I like your thinking wilde smile

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 15:13:26

i have left a message for my consultants secretary to ring me back to see if she can so anything for me. not sure if i will need another refferal from my gp as i already have a gynae just not sure if she will see me for this or if she is just for my mc?

i am seeing the private gynae in a couple of weeks so i can tell him whats going on as well. it makes me feel really down when i get the bleeding. i never had anything like this until i got pg last time. never had mid cycle spotting so something isn't right.

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 15:14:41

grand i have already had all the blood tests etc so this time i am waiting for a hysteroscopy in case i have scarring or something which could cause mc.

i was wondering what everyone else did re: testing!

Jollyb Thu 31-May-12 16:35:34

Pebs - sorry your having such a rough time. It must be horrid with every thing being so drawn out.

Congrats on the scan state of confusion - very happy news.

I'm still on holiday and despite the rain we are having a good time. Coming to the end of my 2WW now and have managed to resist testing so far (would mean buying a test in the tiny village store). I'm going to try to be good and wait til Monday. If not successful this cycle - I get to try out my shiny new clearblue fertility monitor. It arrived a day to late to use this month. Who'd have thought anyone could get so excited about a little machine!

pebspop Thu 31-May-12 16:39:27

well, my consultant cant see me until 2 July ffs.

i will mention my problems to the private consultant in a couple of weeks and see what he says. i will probably have to see my consultant mid july then if i need to.

what a pain in the ass.

ConfusedMumDotCom Thu 31-May-12 18:19:44

Evening everyone.

One of the partners at work told me she was pg today. She hasn't told anyone else yet as she has her 13 week scan next week. She just wanted to make sure I knew from her as I'm off next week. I'm very happy for her as she has had 5 mcs and has been so kind to me since mine. But I immediately burst into tears blush

Anyway, I'm seeing the first of my pregnant NCT friends tonight. I have lots of wine for the two of us me. I fully expect to cry lots this evening too. Oh and next weekend we are visiting my other pregnant NCT friend. I think once thats out the way everything should be fine until my due date.

I can't wait for this weekend. I'm shattered.

ConfusedMumDotCom Thu 31-May-12 18:25:57

On a happier note my DC just said "marmite". I'm so proud grin

ConfusedMumDotCom Thu 31-May-12 18:26:40

Grr "DD" blooming iPhone

oo00PIXIE00oo Thu 31-May-12 19:37:59

Evening ladies great new thread smile well I'm a month and a half on from my mc and my body seems to be back to normal, ovulation starts this weekend so we will be TTC often blush goth I understand exactly how you feel for the first couple of days I couldn't bring myself to get out of bed - couldn't even be bothered to change the channel on the tv so I threw myself back into work. But still have moments when I want to just curl up and cry sad

Congrats to all the new mums x

Im not very good at regular contact so will drop in and say hello occasionally have a great weekend all x

Hope you have a lovely evening confused x

ConfusedMumDotCom Thu 31-May-12 23:08:21

Thanks state. I had a lovely evening. We had a curry and I had wine. No tears though. I think that was because I already knew she was pg. She's gutted that I'm not going to be off with her as I'm the only NCT person left in walking distance and she was really looking forward to us both being off. But if i get pg in the next few months we'll have at least 6 months together, maybe more as she has the option of taking an additional year of mat leave were she works! I also off loaded all my summer maternity clothes to her. So all in all a cathartic evening.

I hope everyone else is doing ok tonight.

Glad it went ok confused your very brave, I've hidden since my mmc, still not seen any pregnant friends or sil. X

evening ladies smile

pebs is it a HSG you are waiting for? i had one along with all the blood tests etc in liverpool and although less than pleasant it helped rest my mind that its not my uterus at fault its just my whole blood system... crappy that the wait is so long. definitely pester the life outof the clinic for a cancellation i will dig out the MC speciallist nurses number and inbox youif you want incase it may be of use...

martha so sorry about your friend sad {{{hugs}}}

hope everyone else is oksmile

Quicksie Thu 31-May-12 23:40:54

Hello! I am totally new to mumsnet...well to posting anyway, I have been reading the boards through tears cake crumbs for the last month since a MMC at 12 weeks...But now ready for some metal and moshing with fingers crossed!

Welcome to the mosh pit quicksie smile

Morning everyone. smile

Lovely day outside today, not so hot as the last few but still warm, just the way I like it.
I saw the midwife yesterday, 16 weeks today, little bean is wiggling around like a pro and heartbeat is strong.
I am being whisked away to a hotel for the night by DP now I am finally up to it, I seem to have come through the greasy haired, flabby looking stage (touch wood) and my skin is finally improving, this time last month I did't dare leave the house because my face was a bleeding, scabby mess of sores and spots, so I'm quite glad that one is passing!

The midwife was talking about being referred to the antithetic team as I'm high risk, does anyone know why or what for?

Anyway, I hope everyone is well and there are BFPs to come, to those who are pregnant today, I wish you many more weeks/months of it! smile
For those of you who got the dreaded AF or are having to wait, I am sending you a great big dose of SWI blessing and hugs. smile

<lays out pancakes with syrup, fresh fruit, freshly squeezed juice and brew

Mmm breakfast! I'm starving! Well I'm in Glasgow on a jolly with the exam board. Enjoying a cup of tea before heading down to the gym and pool. Have a meeting later then it's back on the train to get home again. 4 hours of peace... Hope you're all well...

fatasbutter Fri 01-Jun-12 08:55:53

Welcome quicksie <mumbles through pancake crumbs> - this lot are very friendly!

Very brave Confused - not sure I could be so generous with my maternity clothes but I bet it was therapeutic? It is hard initially with preg friends, but helps if they are kind and sensitive rather than awkward or patronising ... state are you feeling ready to face them yet? It definitely improves with inCreasing exposure I would say (excuse random big C - DS crawling all over me for some reason!)

Anyone due to test yet or all still well in 2ww? (is it appropriate to ask?!?!)

fat I could deal with friends now but SIl treated me very badly over my MMC as she is due just a few weeks after I was, and was very much "I won't hide my joy and excitement, why should I?" Including tagging me and dp in scan pics on facebook, asking dp if we'd let her have our pram etc... Putting status' about "people who are so wrapped up in themselves and can't be happy for me aren't worth my time" followed by her DH commenting "if anyone is horrible to you ill break there legs" this the day after my ERPC sad and me and sil were very close before hand. Luckily she lives hundreds of miles away but we usually see each other monthly, luckily she's dug her own grave with dp so its not causing rows between us two.

DD has told me this morning the baby is at father christmas' house growing in a flower pot! She did not look convinced when I said its in my tummy! Can't wait until its kicking hard so she can feel it!

Any iminent POASers?

<Adds bacon sausage egg mushrooms beans hash browns and toast to the breakfast table, and orange and cranberry juice>

fatasbutter Fri 01-Jun-12 09:13:13

She sounds horrible! Even before I had a mmc it would never occur to me to behave like that towards someone in that situation!

I must admit I was reluctant to tell people about it in case they had the wrong reaction - either excessive pity or dismissiveness - and I have a couple of close friends who don't know as every time I called they were too busy to talk or so self obsessed it just felt wrong (one of them I know will be upset that I felt like that if it ever does come up in conversation) - sigh - this baby making is so much more stressful than it first appeared ... confused

It is isn't it.

Tbh with sil I wasn't to suprised, she's the youngest and only girl out of 5 dc, so has a real sense of self importance and now looking back is a real user! Me and dp are just sitting back waiting for the fall out as she hated being on mat leave with dc1 and now she's leaving work and will have 2 under 2. She is not maternal. My big two are 16months apart so I know only too well how hard that is but she thinks sitting home all day is the easiest option, whereas I learnt getting out of the house was. I'm actually very relieved that they will be 4 and nearly 6 when this one arrives, although the years of ttc, cps, mc and mmc were no fun!

I just told people this time but then regretted it as I didn't want people feeling sorry for me or asking if I'm ok. I prefer to be alone or talk here than have people in RL in my face.

wilderumpus Fri 01-Jun-12 10:41:01

confused you are so brave. I can't face pg people that well yet and definitely would not give away any of my mat clothes. That would feel like rubbing salt in the wound for some reason not at all bitter

Was signed off work with depression yesterday. Am ok if at home, not so good anywhere else! Not got over the mc very well, three weeks of limbo while they did scans to check it really was a blighted ovum have taken their toll, and not unreasonably according to my extremely lovely gp. Just saying so anyone else in this situ might feel better if they too feel low seemingly ages after the event (my actual mc was in hosp a month ago).

state that sounds bloody awful about your sil. Really selfish and harsh! Best out of that one perhaps... but family... meh.

fat very appropriate to ask about 2ww etc! I am really excited about the fact I have just finished my AF, DH seems to be on board re: baby sex and he has the next nine days off to relax and shag me senseless. Baby no. 3 here we come! (can't believe am ttc my third baby... weird!)

Today I am inside with DS, feeling like i just want hot chocolate and a good book and complete peace... he wants me to be fireman mummy, to be a mountain he can climb and fling himself off and a horse he can ride. Ohhhh, how long till DH gets home?! Am going to bake a cake (with hyper DS)... wish me luck! hmm oooh me nerves!

pebspop Fri 01-Jun-12 11:57:26

state your sil sounds like a tosser! i would love to tell you about my tosser of a sil (well brother's gf) she is a nightmare - the stories i could tell would out me too much though!

confused. glad to hear it went well with your friend.

i am feeling much better today. i was inputting af on fertility friend last night and realised that what i thought was af(only lasted one day) 10 days ago was when i usually ov and the bleeding yesterday would be af starting after the usual 28 days. i haven't been keeping track of days so didn't have a clue where i was at (very unlike me!)

dr google found plenty of people with ov bleeding after mc - maybe my hormones aren't quite right yet as i have never had this before.

my last af dragged on for 10 days which is unheard of for me so i feel like i have been bleeding on and off constantly. will see how this one goes.

i really should start temping again to help me know whats going on.

i have been taking my b vits so hopefully they will help.

WhyAlwaysBoris Fri 01-Jun-12 12:08:53

Hello everyone, i haven't had time to catch up on the thread for the last couple of days, madly busy trying to finish off some stuff at work as off today for a week, so don't know what is going on, I hope everyone is ok, I will catch up when i'm back next week.

It is the due date of our son today who died at 20 weeks so dh and i are going away for a few day, we are going to a prayer thing which i think will help.

I'm in a mad rush, sorry, but wanted to pop on before i went and wish Yikes all the best for tomorrow. I hope your day is beautiful and everything goes perfectly. I will be thinking of you.

squeakymac Fri 01-Jun-12 13:22:59

state the joy of SILs eh! One of mine has 4 kids and didn't say anything to me after MC not a word grrrr!

Does anyone else feel the days pass incredibly slowly at this early, worrying stage? I can't believe I'm only 5+2. Not helped by the most awful lower back pain which has woken me up from sleep every night for the last week - I have to get up and stretch and walk around for a while and it goes away then, reeeeally hope it settles down soon! According to Dr Google its ligaments stretching - anyone have any thoughts?

Also quite blush as a not v close friend guessed that I was pregnant because (in her words) I look 'so awful'! Thanks! Hoping noone else (mum, boss etc) guesses...

Hope you all enjoy your long BH weekend, we're stuck with just 3 days here (Ireland)!

squeakymac Fri 01-Jun-12 13:24:28

PS boris hope you get through the weekend ok and the prayer service gives you some comfort, mind yourself

pebspop Fri 01-Jun-12 13:28:34

marbles i think they are going to do hsg or hyteroscopy but i need to have an initial consultation first, which i am having in a couple of weeks.

any phone numbers etc will be very useful - thanks!

boris look after yourself this weekend, take it easy.

JaffaSnaffle Fri 01-Jun-12 13:34:49

Boris, I hope you find some peace this weekend. X

Thinking of you Boris x

wilderumpus Fri 01-Jun-12 14:18:57

boris I haven't spoken to you before but was lurking and know of your story. I hope you find some comfort in the service and have a nice time away.

pebs pinpointing the bleeding sounds promising! I had ov bleeding too in my last (wtf) cycle - I thought it was just a hangover from the mc bleeding and dtd on day two of the ov spotting and, realising in retrospect with FF, missed the egg as i ov'ed that day! grrr. And this AF I just finished was 6/7 days long when normally 4. Does the ov bleeding continue then? interesting. After i had DS I started to get ov pain, just light AF type cramping - so weird how our bodies are always changing.

squeaky arf early pregnancy is a nightmare! Is it really painful as in, painkiller bad? or constant? or just at night so could just be your bed and one of those things? If you have a niggling worry don't hesitate to call the gp just to set your mind at rest. smile

tedmundo Fri 01-Jun-12 14:35:43

boris .. I am thinking about you today and wishing you strength and healing. Best wishes to you.

wilderumpus .. I am not stalking you over from the June TTc thread honest!

I just feel like such a huge part of my TTc journey is coping with the feelings I have of the MC and I don't like to bang on about it over there for all the first timers that have never had a pregnancy. I feel like such a misery.

I am due AF on June 5th but cracked today and tested with a FRER which suggests quite a good success rate 5 days early.

It was of course a sodding BFN. please reassure me ladies that their success stats are a pile of poo and it doesn't mean game over for this month?!?!

If it is a no go for this month, I may well give next month or two a miss from TTc as this 2ww is really messing with my head. My DH has quite rightly pointed out that I am so wrapped up in the idea of getting pregnant that I am neglecting the current 2 DSs.

sorry about the me me me. having a truly shocking day. Probably a bit of PMT .. Sob!

pebspop Fri 01-Jun-12 14:45:51

wilde i don't think we will always have ov bleed. this was my first proper cycle since mc. the people i read about on my google search just seemed to have the ov bleed be the first cycle after mc. something to do with hormones maybe?

ted i would stay away from the normal ttc threads - they don't have a clue what it's like for us (lucky things!) 5 days early seems too early to me. try again in a couple of days.

can you not try not trying but not preventing for the next couple of months. it might help you to relax a bit if you think you aren't trying but you might get lucky. i think it would really put my dh off ttc if i was so wrapped up in it that i was neglecting other parts of my life so he doesn't see the half of it lol!!

wilderumpus Fri 01-Jun-12 14:50:08

ted good to see you! Come, come, join us <beckons with scary finger and wafts bacon butty under nose unless veggie... in which case... not> smile

It is nice here, everyone is reet friendly and understanding of our inability to just enjoy ttc and the ensuing (fingers crossed) pregnancy. And I think, because we are all miserable and worried to varying degrees we can all be rather jolly about it, but in a knowing way rather than the 'woohoo' jolliness that I rather bitterly see as naivety sad Personally am still pretty raw from my mc too and am only just sort of getting my head around the fact i might be lucky enough to get pg again let alone have a baby, so indeed, come in!

Anyway... To test today is quite early? very early?! And I am rubbish with DS in my 2ww! Am so distracted! I only noticed it this past month and thought oh, I am always like this on the 2ww! then decided to stop ttc, then realised I have to have a 2ww if I am gong to get pg, so better just suck it up and cope better!

Hope you are ok, rant away. it's bank holiday! hurrah?!

pebs ever need a sil bitchathon feel free to pm me grin

Thinking of you boris xx

ted my ds who I'm pretty damn sure is real, he's meant to be 5 soon, took 12 yes TWELVE BFNs before I got a BFP, I was 10wks when it finally showed a line!

I'm mettaling today. I just feel bleaugh and very um damp down below, nothing to worry about when I wipe its very faint yellow-ish but I'm guessing that's just pee <doesn't usually inspect toilet tissue> anyone?

tedmundo Fri 01-Jun-12 15:02:24

Ladies, your stories are making my slightly crazy SIL look almost normal. I don't know how you are coping with such vile people.

wilder not a veggie at all .. Bacon buttie YUM YUM.

yes, there is a fair amount of innocence over there that is starting to grate a bit. pebs you are right that they don't understand and yes they are lucky. For me it is of course a worry about getting preggers again, but that is only the start of the worry. I am stressing about where I will be for the miscarriage if I am pregnant. I have started looking at where the local hospital is to us in Spain as if I am pregnant now, I will be 11 weeks when I am there and that is when I lost the last baby. It was not a pretty time.

So yes, I am very glad that you all see me as a normal lady on the TTc path after mc and not a nutter.

God bless you for saying too early to test. I am very sad and scared and confused. but possibly still in with a chance??

pebspop Fri 01-Jun-12 15:21:12

i cope with my sil as she has turned my brother against me and i never see them any more. nothing to cope with!!

i feel my brother is in for a world of pain in the future as she is vile and cannot possibly go through life without making his life hell at some point. she has already got him upto his eyeballs in debt as they have loads of catalogues, payday loans etc all in his name - she doesn't have a job.

she also tried to turn my mum against me but luckily my mum saw the light and realised what a bitch she is. my mum was loving her (cause she was chatty and the other gf's never were) and i couldn't believe she didn't see what she was really like. i knew from day one of meeting her! she is banned from my mums house now thank god.

families eh!! who'd have 'em.

(sometimes these troubles secretly put me off ttc - families can be a lot of hassel)

wilderumpus Fri 01-Jun-12 15:25:07

how many days dpo are you ted? The earliest I got a pos was at 10dpo and was the faintest line ever. vanishingly faint.

the chatter was starting to grate on me too, i must confess blush. it's just because we have had a mc, therefore we are different, we see and feel pregnancy differently. it's not them, it's us. Your next baby will be fine ted, really, you have to believe that. If i get pg this cycle i will be about 13 weeks odd when we go on holiday... I absolutely intend to be pg and happy about it on that holiday! That holiday is everything to my sanity!

mmm spain... bloody love spain smile

wilderumpus Fri 01-Jun-12 15:27:10

oh pebs why can't your brother see this?! How frustrating sad

bonzo77 Fri 01-Jun-12 16:32:00

state I have been super wet since before my BFP and it has not let up. Using pantiliners and changing them a couple of times a day. Also a bit yellow, and rather fragrant. GP says it's fine though. Essentially I am constantly inspecting toilet paper and knickers. I look every time I go, and when I am at home I'm always having a bit of a feel blush.

pebs. Very sad that your SIL is such a cow. Your brother may well see the light, eventually. I think in these situations you just sort of have to wash your hands of it all, but be fully prepared when the situation reverses to pick up where things once were and resume a normal relationship with DB. You know that the reason he's turned on you is her. There are so many threads on MN where women complain that their DH's side with their families rather than their wives, and I guess you are stuck on the wrong side of someone else's version of this scenario, and your DB is probably torn and doing as we would all want our DH's to do by standing my his DW. Shit though.

Well, 9 weeks today. If all is OK my odds of a live birth now are pretty good. Feeling like shit (yay) and MW a week today....

bonzo so glad its not just me blush I fear the next 6mnths may send me doo lally.

Tiago Fri 01-Jun-12 17:23:57

marking place

Jollyb Fri 01-Jun-12 20:14:43

Ted I'm with you. I'm due on Monday but cracked and did a test today. I'm on holiday in the depths of Pembrokeshire but popped into a chemist today. I tested in the public toilets! Of course it was a BFN. I'm trying to console myself by the fact it wasn't a FMU but I've got the feeling that it isn't to be this month.

Boris - hope the weekend goes ok for you.

MrsPear Fri 01-Jun-12 21:13:56

Hello everyone

I am still knicker and loo paper watching too. Bonzo we must be due the same time; beginning of Jan?

boris i hope that you and your husband are able to find peace this weekend. Thinking of you both.

To all the testers - try again in a couple of days. I would like some more positives!

Confused sounds like you have a good evening, i am pleased for you.

Hello to the newbies - sorry you find yourselves here too.

fatasbutter Fri 01-Jun-12 21:31:55

Ugh have quite bad period pains and AF due around 6th sad - not got a great feeling about this month... Wish I could stop wanting to POAS! Is a waste of blinking money if nothing else!!!hmm
I am blaming the mmc for making me like this - am obsessed with being pregnant again before edd of baby I mc in March (October) - is not helpful tho is it really?! Poor long suffering DH is being quite patient when I have my mini freak outs...

Hope you are all well and have a lovely Jubilee weekend, for those who are planning to partake of festivities! x

tedmundo Fri 01-Jun-12 22:03:01

oh jollyb hon - it is such a kick in the teeth to get the BFN isn't it? I don't know why I do it early. My wee also wasn't morning wee but was a dark yellow so don't think that excuse really stands. I am going to wait a couple of days and test again. But also feeling negative about this month.

wilde . I am 10 dpo today. 4 more days til AF so prob was a bit silly to test early. It was like I was possessed! My hand was in the toileteries cupboard and my knickers were down before my brain engaged! Spooky.

fats .. the wanting to be pregnant again before previous due date (Sept for me) is one I understand only too well. Is this what these old timers call metalling? If so, I'm rather good at it!

ConfusedMumDotCom Fri 01-Jun-12 22:11:10

Fats I know how you feel. My edd with the mc is 23 November and I am desperate to be comfortably pg (ie more than 14 weeks) by then - so no pressure.

Balls. I just want to be pregnant. sad

On a brighter note, DH and I are both off work on Friday. We're going to put DD into nursery that day and have a long boozy lunch in bed somewhere nice. grin so that's something to look forward to.

bonzo77 Fri 01-Jun-12 22:33:59

mrspear, yep, early jan but hoping for ELCS so may be late dec. had emcs last time and gp reckons I will have a reasonable case.

I'm going to be 12+3 on my Due date, so glad i got a positive scan as the pain from the dd arriving without a healthy bean cooking would have pushed me over the edge, its not helped by the fact that its also my late Grandmas birthday near my old dd too. hormonal wreck tonight.

ConfusedMumDotCom Sat 02-Jun-12 08:16:12

Morning everyone.

Just popping on to wish Yikes a wonderful wedding. Have a great day and try to take some time out with your soon to be DH to enjoy the moment - its flies by too quickly.

wilderumpus Sat 02-Jun-12 10:08:09

happy wedding day yikes! I was due to get married today too - had a venue and everything but family turned feral so we eloped last year smile we are celebrating our unwedding day today with a cream tea (was on our wedding breakfast menu)

YES yes I really realised last night that I want to be pg before my the edd of my mc (20 nov so with you there confused. cycle buddies in many ways...) I realised I feel like a ghost person because am depressed I need to feel whole again with a baby in mah belly. Need the baby. Don't want to think that too much because that is indeed where metalling lies... but it is true and I hope DH gives me LOTS of shagging this next 10 days so I can just sit back over my 2ww thinking I did the best I could this month and what wil be will be... I am happy with that.

state so glad you are pg and will be pg on your edd, that is lovely for you.

ted 10dpo is too early! and you too fat! step AWAY from the sticks smile

confused your friday sounds super smile

off for fry up now and then to see thomas and the fat controller. laters yo.

I'm very envy of your fry up wilder

Congrats on your wedding day MRSyikesgrin DH and I have been married for 5years in augustsmile it's lovely!

wilderumpus Sat 02-Jun-12 19:48:30

my fry up was well lush state. then I had fish and chips for tea. I would blush but I have no shame smile I shall go for a run tomorrow or something probably something smile

Jollyb Sat 02-Jun-12 20:09:02

Many congrats on your wedding Yikes. We keep finding reasons to postpone ours -have been engaged since 2009!

Wishing you all a happy bank holiday weekend. We got back from our holiday today and both DP and I are suffering with post holiday blues. I cheered myself up by buying a new BBQ. (yes I know the weather forecast looks awful) .

Was very proud of myself in sainsbos - I managed to walk past the clear blue digitals- hurrah!

tasmaniandevilchaser Sat 02-Jun-12 20:26:45

hi just marking my place here, will be back

kirrinIsland Sat 02-Jun-12 22:48:45

Congratulations yikes hope've had a great day smile

I've been offline for a couple of days so imneed to go back and catch up. They way you lot can talk it may take a while smile

Hope everyone is well and enjoying the long weekend.

I had a blood test this week to se if I have immunity to chicken pox even though I've never had it, and I do, so that's one less thing to metal about.
I'm 17+3 and hardly feeling any movement. I want daily kicks to keep my stress levels down....

morning smile

hope everyone is having a good weekend...smile

<coughs> i...erm...BFP...erm...<let the metal begin> ;)

pebspop Sun 03-Jun-12 12:07:49

Congrats marbles!

Will you be doing anything different this time? Will Liverpool be keeping an eye on you?

TheonlyoneIknow Sun 03-Jun-12 12:12:56

Congrats marbles that's fab news!!

Congratulations marbles grin

JaffaSnaffle Sun 03-Jun-12 12:47:33

Great news Marbles! X

fatasbutter Sun 03-Jun-12 12:50:05

Oh wow! Massive congrats marbles!

That's marble-ous!! <hangs head in shame> blush

So glad to hear some good news - can you sprinkle some BFP dust over here for next cycle as the nasty AF bitch witch has come early and got me sad

Good luck anyone else due to test! X


pebs I will be waiting until past the date AF is due (anytime from tuesday until next tuesday) and then will call the RMC and speak to the lovely RMC nurse to book in for after 6weeks. They will supposedly scan me and do blood tests and give me heparin to inject up to 37weeks.

I am technically 3+5 today... I think I ovulated early so I could be further along thoughwink I will be self doubling my aspirin dose from today though... I already take 75mg for the lupus control so I doubt sticking at that would be any benefit...

Jollyb Sun 03-Jun-12 13:47:21

Many, many congrats Marbles. Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy.

Fats- I'm out for this month too. my period started today. In a way am quite relieved as was feeling so moody and angry yesterday. I'd forgotten what proper PMT feels like. I also get to play with my clearblue fertility monitor - let the fun begin!

pebspop Sun 03-Jun-12 13:54:09

Will be following your progress marbles ad it sounds like you are similar to me . Hope I can join you soon!

wilderumpus Sun 03-Jun-12 13:54:10

marbles that is fabulous! congrats congrats! i honestly am so happy that so many of you are all getting preggo on this thread smile hurray!

fatasbutter Sun 03-Jun-12 14:15:48

The lovely thing about our thread is that I am only genuinely happy when people get BFP/have their scan and not jealous unlike in RL (I am a bad person!) - I may have mis-worded that but hopefully u know what I mean!

that said it is a bit depressing to think how many months I could be waiting til I get to join you successful ones! confused

squeakymac Sun 03-Jun-12 14:34:18

Congrats marbles yay! Out of interest will you be on heparin for proven clottiness or just cos of the lupus? smile

Sorry fats and jolly fingers crossed for next month.

Away for lovely weekend, chilling while DH plays golf. Had glass of red wine on purpose and also accidentally ate some goats cheese last night blush but trying not to metal too much about it....

Congrats marbles

37 weeks you say? Will you be on Fragmin? I was on Clexaine the past 2 pregnancies but Fragmin this time is the preferred choice apparently.
I'm taking it until baby is born though then for 6 weeks after.

tasmaniandevilchaser Sun 03-Jun-12 18:25:49

marbs smile great news! So happy for you smile

jaffa glad all the scans and tests were ok, I haven't been on much lately, but have been lurking to see you are ok

manda can't remember if I've said congrats yet, but well done! Hope your DS is doing well and you are all measles free now.

glad there is lots of good news on this thread at the moment, it gives me hope

boris have been thinking of you this weekend, hope it was ok and you did something lovely to remember your baby. I know it's really hard.

It was the due date for the MMC this weekend. It just feels like the Jubilee celebrations are rubbing my face in it - I'm finding it very difficult, not really in a celebratory mood. We went for walk in the countryside and picked some ordinary flowers and made a little posy and threw it in the river to say goodbye to the baby, but DD got hysterical at throwing the flowers away (she did have her own posy but when you're 3 yrs old....). It wasn't exactly atmospheric, but hey ho!

pebs hope the acupuncture is going well. I have started charting my temps again. I don't seem to have high temps after ov, though the CBFM says I've ovulated. Another thing to stress about!

I also found out that taking Vit B6 can lower your oestrogen, don't know if that's true - has anyone else heard that? It was on the Taking Charge of your fertility website, from a moderator. I've been taking B vits and my EWCM has gone right down, so I think I'll hold off them for a bit and see what happens. I was taking them for a short luteal phase. God it's such a minefield, can someone just magic a baby into me??!!!

countmyblessings hi!! there's 3 of us now on here with a previous EP. waves to midget - hope everything is going well for you midget!

martha hi, how's it going, can't remember if I've said congrats, but very happy for you!

and hi to everyone else, hope this a good month for those TTC and a calm month for all those who have got their BFPs!

and insomniaqueen if you're still lurking, hope all is going well with Amelia x

ConfusedMumDotCom Sun 03-Jun-12 18:55:07

Just popping on to say congratulations to marbles grin

JaffaSnaffle Mon 04-Jun-12 09:06:48

Having a bit of a metal here. Not much of a reason. Just not feeling proper kicks. Think there might be a few- think- but my placenta is at the front so feeling little. 18 weeks tomorrow. I have a bump now, which means I can't disguise it, which bring spectre of another public late mc...
Also, sorry if tmi, but worrying about sex and orgasm. I know that unless you have been told you are high risk etc, which I haven't, it's fine, but I cannot stop worrying.
It is 2 weeks tomorrow until my next 'check-in'. It will be my 20 week scan. Not too long really but still long enough.
I thought the metalling would be calming down, but apparently not. I think the history of late mmc has made me completely doubt my body.

I am so sorry this is me me me, especially for those who are ttc or are waiting to get to their own pregnancy milestones.

Boris and Tas. Big hugs for your anniversaries. X

Martha, thinking of you and your friend too.

Ooh marbles great news! :D

Yikes congratulations, hope all went well!

Jaffa hope you're ok x

Another one here who just wants to be pregnant again...

pebspop Mon 04-Jun-12 13:43:07

Interesting tas I have been taking b vits and had no ewcm for the first time ever. I will keep taking them and see what happens this month.

Jaffa I know I would be feeling the same ad you. Late miscarriage is a horrible thing and is bound to affect future pg.

Gosh, doing this on memory and my memory is shot to hell because of all the Sleep Deprivation

Marff I remember when you first told us about your dear friend. Such a sad time but I think most of us here can recognise how important goodbyes are and I'm so glad you got to have yours as much as I wish you didn't need to - but I know you know what I mean! Holding you in my thoughts... and lurking for preggo updates.

boris I really hope you did find some solace in the service. My EDD was a strange time - compounded by getting a bfp a little while before (the anniversary of the induction was much more traumatic for me). I think the main thing is to actually acknowledge it, whether in deed or just thought. <hugs>

Yikes Many congrats! I've a wedding to arrange at some point... just as soon as I sort out my divorce! Which will no doubt happen after we sort out buying a house... all of the above somehow went into limbo (with me) over the last year and a bit following the loss. Life just gets in the bloody way sometimes!

jaffa hearing you loud and clear over the anterior placenta - what kind of cruel joke is an anterior placenta after a loss? We need to feel the movements! You really are ok to have sex and, uh, enjoy it, y'know? Well, unless your placenta is low/anterior in which case I'm always shocked at how often caregivers neglect to inform what a low placenta means and precautions that need to be taken. Ha! I'm such a doofus - I was about to say 'will you find out the flavour at the 20 weeks scan?' <facepalm>

marbles WHEEEEEEEE! Fantabulous news! <hands leather studded jacket>

lots of new people May this thread bring you the luck, love and support I've recieved (and fostered) here. A part of me is actually kinda sad that many of the 'names' are changing but it's actually that this thread has so many success stories that it's the case. Mc, even rmc, doesn't mean you will never have another baby - far from it. And with the advice and support you'll get here it may well be that you get another baby sooner than you imagine and I know that sometimes it feels like it will NEVER happen. IT WILL!

Well, Ladies and Gentlemen (what gentlemen, you say? Well, I hate to point out that those of you with blue coloured bfps/bumps are making teeny tiny penises inside you... grin ) Measles has left the building! Of course, baby has 'woken up' somewhat so my chance to regroup and rest up passed in a haze of older children illness but ah, well, I'll muddle through. Re: him not making his birthweight by day 10 - between day 10 and day 13 when he was weighed again he'd gained 150 grams which is nearly 6oz... piling it on now he's woken up! jeeze at this rate he'll be gaining a pound a week <my breastmilk definitely not for dieters!>

To MiLs for roast lamb shortly so better try and get ready... <waves>

I'm in the same position today Jaffa, no movements felt, usually get a couple, plus my 'bump' which is usually quite high and protruding has sunk and looks more like a flabby tummy today, I'm not feeling very pregnant. sad

wilderumpus Mon 04-Jun-12 16:19:27

<Puts patronising hat on>

tits bumps change shape smile My DS would have days when he had 'gone to ground' - particularly if I had been around loud music?!

jaffa hope you are ok. Don't forget that you are only 18 weeks which is only early for proper good kicks anywho?

<takes hat off and apologises heartily for teaching you how to suck eggs>

manda lovely to hear your news and congrats! i am one of the newbies and thank you for your kind welcome. I completely know how you feel with new people coming in, but you are a grand dame here (in the nicest possible way!) and we all need your advices and inspiration perlease (particularly the bit about how we could get pregnant again!).

Today I feel like shite. Am supposed to be starting sex week but not in the mood (feel low) and having been to two public parks and a fete today and been surrounded by preggo people and their broods have completely convinced myself I will never be lucky enough to be preggers again. utterly never. <glugs gin straight from bottle> <passes round to anyone else feeling reet sorry for themselves on this most joyous of bank bloody holidays> Bah humbug smile

tasmaniandevilchaser Mon 04-Jun-12 16:43:26

thanks wilderumpus I'll join you with feeling sorry for myself and drinking gin, but being a very classy lady, I'll have mine in a bucket with ice and a big slice. Ta!

jaffa and tits hope you're ok, it's understandable to be metalling, it'd be a bit strange if you didn't

pebs keep me posted on the EWCM, I'm off the Bvits, so we can do our own case study (2 participants only). God I'd never thought I'd write that - keep me posted on your EWCM, what has my life come to!! grin

hi to everyone else, hope you're having a more jolly weekend

fatasbutter Mon 04-Jun-12 17:52:02

Giss a swig of gin then, wilde!

Must be about cd2 or 3 by now - stupid AF! Will have to gird our loins and get busy in a few days!!

<tries to slowly prise fingers of jaffa and tits off their full metal jackets>

But seriously, I completely understand what a bag of nerves you will be until you are holding that tiny bundle in your arms... x

Polka2 Mon 04-Jun-12 17:54:23

Marbles - such great news! Huge congrats!!

Huge hugs to everyone going thru' anniversaries and tricky dates, it must be so hard and I hope you all manage to muddle through it.

I'm in the same gang of wanting to be pregnant before my due date with the twins (Sept) and have absolutely and utterly convinced myself that this month is the month (I'm in the 2ww at the mo)- god only knows what will happen if its a BFN!

Hope everyone's having a great long w-end and getting in lots of SWI!

kirrinIsland Mon 04-Jun-12 18:08:47

Congratulations marbles fab news grin

Jaffa I'm 18 weeks on Wednesday, and haven't been feeling movement much either. I have felt something that could be movements a couple of times but would like the reassurance of proper kicks....

MarthasHarbour Mon 04-Jun-12 18:10:46

Ladies sorry i have been AWOL for a week but it has been a shitter as you know. My BFF is still with us but is so terribly ill, she is being moved to a hospice at the end of the week and her family are with her. I am losing my best friend, even though we are both 39 we acted like teenagers and talked shite constantly. I already miss her so much sad sad

However i shouldnt forget what a supportive bunch of metallers you all are, so i am back to say hi, i cant catch up as a week is a long time in the mosh pit but if that is ok with everyone i shall start again from here!

But i will say a massivo congratulations to my old cycle buddy marbles grin grin i am so very happy for you!!!!

i also want to just say a big thank you to all of you for your support, you are all just wonderful loveliness xxx

ConfusedMumDotCom Mon 04-Jun-12 18:26:42

runs and envelops martha in a giant bear hug

tasmaniandevilchaser Mon 04-Jun-12 18:36:01

big bear hug from me too martha so sorry about your friend sad

wilderumpus Mon 04-Jun-12 19:20:44

<passes round gin and scrabbles around for glasses for posh people> <eyes up red wine ... decides should wait until 9pm so as to avoid too much of a red wine hangover>

martha am so sorry. I hope you are ok.

polka so sorry you lost your twins. i know exactly what you mean about wanting to be pg before your EDD. Where are you on your 2ww? Can I ask or are you being all nonchalent so you can POAS on the sly?! Hope it is your month smile

wishfulthinking1 Mon 04-Jun-12 19:46:29

Hi all-
Hope it's ok if I join this thread?

Currently miscarrying first baby- I was 7+2- devastated, angry and so so sad. Have scan booked tomorrow (was booked when I began bleeding 6 days ago, but I've definitely had mc over the weekend so I guess scan will just tell me if there's anything left) I just never I imagined this would happen to me (have, blessedly, led a very naive and charmed life!)

Anyway, I'm getting married at the end of july- Would have been 14 weeks at wedding. I need to focus on getting pg again, I think it's the only way I can move on.

My DF is being so wonderful- he's not feeling the loss as painfully as I am- obviously there's the physical pain but also he very much sees that this is just the first step of our journey and that it wasn't yet a baby. I know, realistically, he's right but I so wanted the baby, has made so many plans in my head about our child. The whole thing has just come as such a surprise- a truly shit surprise, obviously.

We're going to ttc again as soon as the bleeding stops. Fx it happens straight away, I just want a baby!

I have a question- do your family know about your mc? We weren't going to tell my parents- we were going to surprise them the day after the wedding :-( now the baby is gone and I'm so sad I just want to talk to them and be comforted by them, but I know it will just cause them sadness- they would love a grandchild. DF is worried that if I tell them about the mc it'll add extra pressure to our ttc-ing, as they'll know we're trying. When I'm feeling ok and positive I agree with him but then I get these dark moments and I'm just so so sad. :-(

So self indulgent!! Sorry!!

Anyway, I'll get tomorrows scan out of the way I need a medical professional to confirm baby is gone as I still have desperate hope that perhaps I was carrying twins or that the baby is fine and all the blood, pain and tissue I e passed is just a dreadful coincidence! I'm such a dick head

Reading through this thread has already made me feel more positive- thanks!

wilderumpus Mon 04-Jun-12 19:51:00

hello again smile welcome, welcome. So very very sorry you are having a mc. Know that it is totally shit and talking about it is in no way self indulgent, we all have our moments where we need to talk and this is why we are hear, to look after each other.

I hope the scan is ok, and hoping it is all ok is perfectly normal and not dickish in any way at all (I had three and hoped at each one it was all wrong and the baby was hiding). ALSO DO tell anyone who you think would give you support in this terrible time. ANYONE. FWIW I have said am not trying for a while now if anyone asks, and if I do get pg i won't tell them till am 12 weeks. having poeple know has really, really helped me though.

take care x

MarthasHarbour Mon 04-Jun-12 19:53:05

first of all wishful this is a self indulgent thread, we are all here for eachother and i am so terribly sorry you are going through this.

it is up to you whether you tell your family or not but i think by the sounds of things it would be a good idea, i think having your wedding to focus on is a good thing (please have oodles of champers for us on the day) i think you need their support. 'The boys' ie your DF will be hurting inside but some of them dont show it as much. He will be struggling with his own emotions and mixed with excitement about the wedding. You have a lot going on at the moment so big hugs from me.

Oo and thanks for the bear hugs guys - you are all lovely x

ConfusedMumDotCom Mon 04-Jun-12 19:56:38

Hi wishfull. Welcome to the thread, do sorry that you had to join us.

I think everything you are feeling is perfectly valid. My parents knew about my mc (at 10 weeks on 30 April) and in the end a lot more people then I ever expected to tell knew. It has really helped me to deal with the grief by being able to say out loud that I'd mc'd. Everyone is different and I'm sure you'll find your own way through these early and difficult days. It does get better, but some days are easier than others. As to other people expectations, I've just been telling people that we've been advised to wait whereas in reality, we've been at it like rabbits trying again.

Sit yourself down and enjoy a large glass of wine. The ladies are lovely here.

kirrinIsland Mon 04-Jun-12 21:27:04

Welcome wishful - like confused I told quite a lot of people first time round and I found it easier that way. Second time I told almost no-one, as that felt right. I guess what I trying to say is there is no right answer - you can only deal with it the way that feels right for you.
Fingers crossed for a quick bfp for you xx

squeakymac Tue 05-Jun-12 08:50:32

Welcome wishful we were on the May thread together. So sorry to see you here, and hope your scan today goes ok (you know what I mean). I told parents and immediate family and a couple of friends about my MC and found it v helpful. If only because it explained why I was being such a social recluse!

Thanks manda for welcoming all us newbies to your little community - you're v inspirational ladies who give all of us lots of hope for a BFP or for a sticky little beanie smile

Just wondering does anyone have experience with back pain in early pregnancy (like 6 weeks)? Ended up sleeping on the floor lst night, think its muscle spasm but its bloody unpleasant. Not too keen to go poking around with acupuncture needles unless there are no other options, seeing a physio hopefully later today....sad

Welcome wishful so sorry your joining us Xx

martha all I can say is cancer is well and truly a cunt! I do hope your dear friend is as comfortable as she can be. Xxx

Midgetm Tue 05-Jun-12 11:31:44

Well put state. . Bear hugs to Manda. And welcome Wishful obviously sorry you needed to find us but you will be well looked after.

I lost the thread again so really must message more. Bad midget.

Well I am in maternity triage listening to some poor girl in agony saying please help me over and over. Gulp.

Had some major cramping in the night after being told I may have an infection on Friday. So sat here waiting and metalling of course. I wonder how much is metal related as its my 20 week scan tomorrow which I have so much riding on but the cramps last night almost seemed like pre term labour so not taking any chances. Probably constipation and I will leave like this blush.

JaffaSnaffle Tue 05-Jun-12 12:14:36

Oh Midget, I really hope you leave like this blush.

I hope they resolve whatever is going on my love. Hope it is digestive, or growing pains. Big hugs, please keep us posted. Xxx

fatasbutter Tue 05-Jun-12 12:51:33

Oh poor you midget how awful for you (and the other girl who is there of course)
Fx that it is all nothing at all to worry about and all is well x

kirrinIsland Tue 05-Jun-12 12:54:38

midget you poor thing - hope everything is ok.

Polka2 Tue 05-Jun-12 13:00:19

Rumpus - I'm day 25 (9 days post ov) and am determined to NOT POAS until after AF is due, as when I was pregnant the sticks didn't pick it up and the longer I go convincing myself this is the month the longer it is until potential disappointment?!

Midget - sounds horrid hope you're ok.

Wishful - welcome and sorry you're in this horrible stage but like the others I told close family/friends as lots had guessed as with twins/12wks I was showing. They've mostly been of amazing support and you also realise how many people have been affected by mmc/mc.

Midgetm Tue 05-Jun-12 14:20:22

Good woman Polka stay away from the sticks not that I ever take this advice myself and I tested most day until I was about 12 weeks

Well I didn't come away blush. Got antibiotics for some kind of infection and now laying on the sofa all cosy whilst my royalist family do queen loving activity in town. Baby still fine. Big day tomorrow. Double gulp. Thanks for your kind messages. Metalling reducing. Helped greatly by stopping on the way home and shovelling down a green Curry. Curry is good for metalling. Please hurry up 20 week scan so I can not be freaky for at least a couple of weeks.

Enjoy the last day of the holidays my full metallers x

wilderumpus Tue 05-Jun-12 14:22:42

Hope you are ok midget.

hope your back pain sorts itself soon squeaky.

well done with your determination polka!

hope you ok today wishful. come and vent whenever; am sure yoyu have been there but the miscarriage board was also a source of strength, kindness and information when I had my mc.

Am not so mardy today! DH let me sleep until 10.30 this morning; think sleeping is really helping with my depressive feelings as i never sleep as much as i have since my diagnosis as i was too wired trying to be 'normal'. I haven't had any depressing thoughts today that I can't cope with and had a big chat with DH last night - over gin - about the mc and the future and he is adamant that he will get me pregnant as and when he wants smile hehe and yay smile

take care ladies

wilderumpus Tue 05-Jun-12 14:25:32

x post midget - so glad bubs is ok though shit you have an infection. hope you are being looked after ok - your alone chill-time sounds lovely! Good luck for tomorrow smile

Hope your ok midge

My symptoms have settled down so I'm worrying, luckily only 9 days until my next scan.

MarthasHarbour Tue 05-Jun-12 15:59:05

state i think i love you grin that was everso succinctly put, it made me laugh out loud!

midget glad you are ok and not blush wink all the best for your scan tomorrow

rumpus i am sorry i havent caught up with the thread but what is your diagnosis? your DH sounds a bit like mine btw - insistent that his 'sperm is strong' and he would get me preggy (said with a scary John Wayne look about him!) hmm

It was something my Grandma said, its stuck with me as its (all be it rather crude) true she was brutally matter of fact about being sick. Its an evil disease and makes me very angry when such wonderful people suffer. I'm sending you lots of ((hugs)) My Grandma should have been 67 this thursday so its all very fresh in my mind and I really do understand. Cancer is a cunt.

Midgetm Tue 05-Jun-12 17:17:38

Let's all say it loud. Cancer is a cunt and I love it that you got that from your Grandma. I actually love her.

Thanks midge, She was amazing I know I'm biased but she was. She took part in a trial nearer the end taking up precious time as in her words "someone did it so I had could have chemo, I'm doing it so hopefully someone can live"

I have a photo of her on my profile with dd as a baby, she adored her and is very much like her great grandma. She proudly does the little legs for life race every year since she got sick as do all of the Grandchildren.

Cancer is a cunt.

kirrinIsland Tue 05-Jun-12 20:37:00

We're all doing the race for life this year in memory of my Mum, who died in September. cancer is indeed a dint sad

leedy Tue 05-Jun-12 21:05:09

Just catching up (I too lost the thread) and saying that wow, I love state's Grandma too.

hi all smile

martha i cant remember if i have said but i am so sorry about your friend sad i agree cancer is indeed a cuntangry

hope everyone is well today!

AF wasdue at her earliest today and has yet to rock up smile 4 weeks pregnant...today I AM PREGNANT smile i have been waiting a while to say that smile

<Grabs kirrin in a huge bear ((hug))> I'm so sorry. Xx

Horay nomoremarbles <let's off last few unionflag party poppers>


kirrinsad so sorry about your mum sad

kirrinIsland Tue 05-Jun-12 21:44:14

Thanks guys

I am laughing at my ipad's auto correct for "cunt" though! It's obviously more polite than I am grin

Yay marbles how exciting! Has it sunk in yet?

MarthasHarbour Tue 05-Jun-12 21:44:43

oh kirrin i am so very very sorry about your mum sad i want to do a race for life but think i may be a bit late this year, i am going to get over to the website now to check it out

state i too love the fact that the statement came from your grandma; lets all say it loud and say it proud - Cancer. Is. A. Cunt. grin

marbles whoop whoop for being 4 weeks pregnant - yayyy!

ladies i am feeling really down for obvious reasons, but i am also just not 'connected' to this pregnancy, i cant bring myself to muster up any enthusiasm for it sad now i know that there are many on this thread who would do anything to be pregnant, and 2 months ago i would have too, but i just feel so blue. I really hope that i can pull myself around and enjoy it but tonight i picked up my green notes which-i am yet to fill in and just felt sadness hmm

is it just because of the situation with my friend or is it the MC? see the thing with my friend is that my emotions are all over the place, on the one hand i am dealing with something deeply tragic but also dealing with something very very exciting and much wanted. one minute i am up there ^ and the next minute i am down there v

or is it because i got my green notes last year and had to throw them out after the MC... maybe i am now associating my green notes with sadness (ie the MC last year), when they were the source of much excitement with DS... oh god i am fucked up at the moment confused

i think i might talk to the midwife when i go for my booking in on 14th June, i dont care if they put me down as a PND risk on my notes - i think this time i would rather be watched like a hawk.

anyone got any cake? or jokes - pleeease i need some jokes - the crap-per the better!

MarthasHarbour Tue 05-Jun-12 21:45:49

kirrin your ipad is everso posh - we dont use the word 'cunt' on kirrin island dont you know - what would Enid say?? confused

tasmaniandevilchaser Tue 05-Jun-12 21:49:26

martha you've already told a good joke about Enid Blyton! I liked it! I think it's normal to feel down and not get excited about a pregnancy after mc. And that's without considering your friend sad. I felt no joy whatsoever when I got the BFP for the ectopic (that's before I knew it was EP obviously).

Anyway, here's a joke - what's brown and sticky?

A stick with poo on it.
You did say crap joke!

kirrinIsland Tue 05-Jun-12 21:53:07

Enid would indeed be horrified grin

I got put down as a PND risk with my pregnancy with DD (after my first loss). I didn't see it as a bad thing, they just keep a closer eye on you, and hopefully will catch you quicker if you look like you're sinking a bit.
Also, I think it's natural to detach yourself from a pregnancy when you've experienced a loss. It's a self-defence mechanism, albeit one that doesn't work. And given everything else you have going on at the moment it's not surprising that you feel blue sad

Martha sweetie stop beating yourself up! I felt blue enough after my bfp with worry and still have down days despite having had a scan. And you have so much more on your mind.

Umm a joke...

My dps favourite is, I want my kids to have the things I never had... nice kids. hmm he thinks its hilarious.

MarthasHarbour Tue 05-Jun-12 22:04:50

tas faaaanx for the crap joke and support! kirrin thanks for the reassurance about the PND risk - i actually 'want' to put myself down as that as i really do not want to 'not' enjoy the pregnancy or newborn IYSWIM.

DH was shock when i said i feel detached, even though he is also anxious about another MC and is really understanding about my friend... i also get free counselling through work so i will give it a month or two and consider giving them a ring even-though when i said that to my mother she said that it wouldnt come to that and a good cry over a cup of tea is all i need hmm bloody mothers!

MarthasHarbour Tue 05-Jun-12 22:06:01

state you really are cranking up the humour on this thread!! grin

ConfusedMumDotCom Tue 05-Jun-12 22:42:44

My sister's favourite joke when she was about 7:

What's big red and eats rocks?
A big red rock eater!

She found this joke hilarious for many, many years. grin

JaffaSnaffle Wed 06-Jun-12 00:13:35

marbles I am so pleased that you are alright-ish. Hope the infection goes, but so glad it is nothing sinister. I hope you understood what i meant about coming away feeling blush. I always feel like a bit of numpty when I have a false alarm, but it is so much better than something bad.

martha, I am not in a jokey mood, but I will think of one for you tomorrow. But I did want to say, you have been through a terrible thing this week with your friend. It must have taken so much from you. And, on top of that you have your metallers cloak on, like we all do, which can get in the way, especially when you are down. It is not surprising you are feeling down.

I don't know whether this will help, but I have felt very strange this pregnancy, things have come in waves. I am excited most of the time, but in a sort of quiet way, rather than a hip hip hooray way, and I feel sad that this is missing. I love my little girl and want to meet her, she is so very precious to me, but I have struggled to tell people, (still not told loads of people, despite my bump),didn't ring the MW till last minute, hate dopplers, don't look at scan pics very often... It is fear, self defence, and sadness for the babies I lost, and reminders of innocence gone. And then sometimes I get a big swoop of joy about it all. And the fear is gradually shrinking, but it has not gone. I have been trying to be pragmatic, just telling myself, I will get through this pregnancy by whatever means it takes. but would love someone to knock me out for a few months and hand me my baby when it is all over

JaffaSnaffle Wed 06-Jun-12 01:19:39

martha I cannot sleep but thought you might like this. It always cheers me up, and so does a Father Ted marathon.


InsomniaQueen Wed 06-Jun-12 06:31:13

Marthas just sending you a giant squeeze from here and reassurance that 'detachment' is quite normal. I felt detached with my pg, just always on the edge of my seat waiting for things to go wrong. At times I would feel elated and was happy to discuss it with anyone then other times I would look at things I'd bought and start totting up how much I'd sell it for when things went wrong.

You will have up and down days - days when you will feel like crap and you might say "god I wish I felt better" then you realise what would have to happen for you to feel better and you take it back hastily. At the moment it's almost too many emotions to cope with, the wound from losing your friend is fresh and raw. Don't beat yourself up for feeling sorrow, it's what shows you how much you loved that person.

I can say without a doubt that it took me a long time to come to terms with it all especially after she was in scbu and it was a few weeks before I felt secure that DD was well and things would be ok and then little by little I fell more in love with her and now she is the centre of my universe. You have all of us, your DH and DS - you will get there!!! Xxxx

Also my crap joke:
I was walking to the shops yesterday and my flip flops fell apart, it was sole destroying. grin

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 06:56:51

martha all you describe is so normal. Remember me hyperventilating just because I booked in with the midwife? I think we are just being our normal broken selves. We will get there but in a different way to others. Joy will come once we are comfortable in our pregnancies. I still rarely feel it. i am hoping that when I reach viability it will be the catalyst I need to believe. I did think it would be the 20 week scan but not so sure now. My midwife recognised my self protection immediately and said it was only natural. They offered specialist service for people who have experienced loss. I am hoping I don't need it but will keep the offer in my mind if I still feel self preservation winning over attachment in the next months.

jaffa Ioved your blush and I knew exactly what you meant, no explanation needed.

Well 20 week scan today. Woken up early by a work colleague and now cant get back to sleep for fretting. May vomit on my shoes in the imaging unit.

What do you call a chicken in a shell suit?

An egg. Ok so now I am a bit blush that is so crap....

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 07:00:27

martha meant to say... I saw a baby the other day, tiny one. All prodigy and cute. It smiled at me. And it's dad was smiling at my belly. And I suddenly thought. Crap, I am going to have one of those in about 18 weeks. This was the first time I had actually seen the pregnancy as a baby in the whole time. It's what we do, even the freakish positive midge does it. It's how we all stay sane x

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 07:12:25

Thats Podgy not prodigy. Damn you autocorrect.

ConfusedMumDotCom Wed 06-Jun-12 08:49:55

Good luck today midgetm. Let us know how it goes. ((hugs))

<holds midges hand> If you're gonna vom. though, I will be letting go momentarily... <something of an emetiphobe> I thought 'viability' would be something of a watershed but you'll all recall how I was still in complete denial right up to the point of, well, delivery, really. It seems to me an element of denial is very, very normal (you reading this, marff? You do know this, I know you do! It's somehow different to recognise your own feelings rather than reassure someone else though, eh?)

I thought it was spiffing that kirrins autocorrect changed cunt to dint! I may have to make that my new swear of choice.

Oh, cancer is a cunt.

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 09:39:36

I feel better being hugged and having my hand held. I will try not to be too much of a dint and puke on the floor, just so Manda carries on holding my hand. Just about to leave for the hospital and can hardly breathe.

JaffaSnaffle Wed 06-Jun-12 09:59:20

Midget, I am thinking of you. Hope it goes well, that you get seen quickly and you are put out of your suspense. Big hug. X

Thinking of you midge xx

pebspop Wed 06-Jun-12 10:32:01

will be thinking about you midge.

i am just about to pop to the gp re my crazy brown spotting/bleeding episodes. not sure what they will do or say. i have been up all night panicing about it all.

i am hoping they test me for hormone inbalances. stupid receptionist was asking me too many questions and i can't stand her anyway so that isn't helping.

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 11:38:58

Seen quickly. Baby Perfect. Sonographer said though that I have an amniotic band but didn't seem too worried. Googled it foolishly and now metalling on full jacket. The baby isn't tangled in it but appears it could be at any stage. Also can't help thinking all my ERPC's have caused this. Google is not my friend. Not seeing my consultant for 4 weeks. May have to call to get that brought forward. Unhelpful that they use the same term regardless of if it a band or a sheet so I can't decide if very serious or not. She didn't seem concerned at all so guess they would have referred me straight away if they were. Help!

pebspop Wed 06-Jun-12 12:03:59

glad the baby was good midget! never heard of amniotic band and don't want to google as i have enough on my plate!! hope it's nothing to worry about and you get seen by your consultant quickly to put your mind at ease.

went to gp - they did sweet FA, i am seeing the private guy next week at liverpool so will see if he can do anything about this persistant spottting.

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 12:23:10

Thanks Pebs I often say GP's are over paid admin assistants. Just always send you somewhere else...

Well I rang the antenatal clinic and they rather worryingly gave me an appointment this afternoon. I know this could be very low risk to the baby or potentially bloody awful (loss of limb, increase miscarriage, deformities a plenty) but I need a consultant to hold my hand. I allowed myself to be all joyous about the pregnancy when I left the scan room but now beside myself with what could go wrong. Need to calm down and step the fuck away from Google. Google is not my friend.

TheonlyoneIknow Wed 06-Jun-12 12:35:12


please don't worry midget xxx

(sorry it's Pie, I need to name change back)

TheonlyoneIknow Wed 06-Jun-12 12:36:40

Sorry I meant to say am sure it's an amniotic sheet otherwise they would have explained more to you as bands are very rare. Sheets don't look to cause any serious problems. x

Glad baby looks ok midge smile

Can anyone help with this?

I have another Urine infection, not seen the dr but classic signs, (painful urination, frequent urination, painful back) I had one 2 weeks ago and took a fulll course of anti biotics.

I'm 16+5 weeks, I can't get an apt with my dr today so I'll either have to go to ooh tonight or wait until tomorrow.

I drink loads and I am a very hygienic person.

This happened every few weeks in my last 2 pregnancies, it's getting silly now.

so a few questions.

Do I go to ooh or wait until I can possibly see a GP tomorrow and drag the kids along to that?

Do I request some sort of further testing into why this happens?

Should I buy some of the dip tests and use them at home so I can just call the dr and say that x,y,z is showing up since it's happening so frequently.

Is there anything they can do to minimise this or am I destined to spend the rest of the pg on and off antibiotics?

Is there anything I can do to help it/stop it happening?

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 12:44:44

Thanks Pie The babycentre link was the first one I looked at. I like that link. I should have stopped there. Trying to think sheet not band. They use the same terminology so lets just think sheet not band for now. Thank god my consultant is so good and they are seeing me quickly. After being calm I am now hysterical.

TheonlyoneIknow Wed 06-Jun-12 12:54:00

I can't say stay away from google! I am the worst for looking and looking until I find the worst possible scenario! Why do I do that?! Why do the negative articles always outweigh the positive ones!!

I'm crapping myself as my C-Section date is the same as the day the doctors are on strike, I know they said maternity services won't be affected but I can't stop fretting something might be wrong with the baby and need a specialist but there won't be one around.

midget I would be very very surprised if it is a band, they wouldn't have been unconcerned if that was the case. Hopefully you can get all your questions answered this afternoon xx

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 13:06:18

Pie I sure as hell hope you are right. She didn't seem too concerned but did just say 'you need to talk to your consultant'. Logic tells me your are right. Dr Google is a right dint. Not sure if sonographers just have really good poker faces. Although would be cruel to let us leave on top of the world if in fact we shouldn't be. She did say it was really rare though which increased my metalling as bands are rare - sheets are not. I am so happy they are seeing me this afternoon though - remind me not to grumble about the NHS for a while

Tits they never seem too concerned about infections unless they are raging so I would wait till tomorrow but if you are worried then stalk OOH. I would ask why they are so frequent though - you are more prone to them but every other week is just taking the piss. see what I did there

MarthasHarbour Wed 06-Jun-12 13:08:05

urgh google STEP AWAY FROM MR GOOGLE NOW - he knows jack shit! midget hope you are hanging up your metalling jacket and just thinking sheets rather than bands (SHEETS not bands <wags finger> <hypnotises midget>)

thanks for all the jokes guys! grin jaffa i am at work so cant click the link but will do so tonight, funnily enough we have a few Father Teds also on our recording box thingy which-i still call a video coz it is my comfort zone! and said to DH that is what i need to watch.

<gives manda an affectionate slap on the back>

<hands kirrin lashings of ginger beer>

tentatively whispers - i am 7+4 today grin

MarthasHarbour Wed 06-Jun-12 13:08:57

oooo i think that was a little bit of excitement coming from me - i honestly think it is this thread that is raising me up (in a westlife stylee)

TheonlyoneIknow Wed 06-Jun-12 13:15:43

7 + 4 is amazing martha (!!!) Are you tempted by an early scan (or did you have one quite recently??) sleep deprivation is seriously affecting me just now and the baby isn't even here yet. I will only have about a week off between finishing work and CS. Mmmmmm, wonder how that happened <boss, GRRRRR>

MarthasHarbour Wed 06-Jun-12 13:27:52

theonlyone/pie i know i cant believe it, DH asks me every day and each day we get that little bit more excited. i had a scan at 5+6 because i went for my booking in appointment and told the MW all about my previous MC and CPs then told her i had some brown spotting, she whipped me straight in. they couldnt see much but could see that elusive 'black spot' which is the sac. they want to be sure so i have another scan on Friday (7+6).

woo hoo! (yes i think i am having a good day!)

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 15:49:43

Martha 7+6, get you all nearly 8 weeks pregnant. Hurray for that little bit of excitement and curses to you for putting that bloody song in my head. You raise me up blah blah blah

Thanks for your hypnotism and positive thoughts. I have seen my consultant - who I have to say is smashing (made some great calls with DD in what was a complicated pregnancy so I really trust her). She says she is not concerned about it at this stage. She thinks it would have attached by now if it was going to. That the fact that everything else looked OK and limbs free and not tangled are all very positive. So I will try and take her advice and not worry. In which case my news is Hurray. I have a healthy baby inside me. I have to accept that the band will mean I feel metalling is justified occasionally but hey - I am sure I would have metalled anyway so no change there. She also said that is more likely to be a fold than a band but can't tell me that for sure. I think a 3D scan would clarify that I am tempted to ring the fetal medicine centre to see if they can maybe put that one to bed with a 3D scan, at least then I can just put it out of my mind completely and remove any element of doubt. although that would maybe removed my entitlement to being a drama queen. I realise I am very lucky and my hospital care is fabulous. I don't know how anyone could have to wait days or even weeks to get that kind of reassurance.I was literally going out of my mind. I am currently loving the NHS. DD had issues because my womb is shit place to be - I couldn't bear this DC having the same experience but maybe loosing limbs to my inhospitable womb.

So this means that I am going to tell DD tonight. I need to accept that this baby could be a reality. Or maybe I should wait until I am 25 weeks

Thanks again your hand holding and kind words were very needed and appreciated.

wilderumpus Wed 06-Jun-12 16:07:16

yay for a good day martha! 7+4 and a scan on monday!

I can't imagine how it would feel to be pg after a mc... can totally understand your confusion and worry about depression/bonding. And you have a lot going on with your friend sad Personally can't wait to be pg but dread it too. I can't imagine how i will feel when (if) I see a positive test. probably think 'here we go then' rather than yay. Being pg is tough and all-consuming but at least normally you can glow and bask in the comfort that you are growing a life... If you can't enjoy being pg because you can't believe in it (after a mc) then pregnancy is a very different type of journey. I think if you can understand and come to terms with that then you can start to embrace it for what it is, rather than what it is not. (can you tell I have been self-counselling to be more positive about stuff?!)

cancer is definitely a cunt/dint. I can hardly type the word. Am so so sorry to hear about your mum kirrin.

I am so sure that you would have been referred to someone asap if it was serious midget? Shit that you are so worried again but yay a perfect baby! My sonographer didn't have a very good poker face at my 6 week scan when faced with an empty sac.

wilderumpus Wed 06-Jun-12 16:08:57

cross post, glad your mind has been put to rest for a while midget smile

tasmaniandevilchaser Wed 06-Jun-12 18:30:09

thanks for a good laugh martha I had a hilarious vision of you on a stool a la Westlife, standing up at the crescendo of "you raise me uuupppp". Am doing a happy jig at 7+6 and also at midget's good 20 wk scan. Because it is all good. (joins in with hypnotising it is a sheet it is a sheet, repeat after me it is a sheet)

piemistress one week isn't enough, I would go into work and do a dramatic faint. Get wheeled out. See you in one year!

Who else is due soon? I have totally lost track - bluecrane? poppyjen? Am I making these names up? The last 3 months have been a haze.

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 19:43:28

bluecrane must be soon surely?

I've just told DD. gulp, it's real now, not just my heartache on the line. She was so delighted. Wish I'd videoed it. She's full of questions and suddenly admitting my tummy is big (previously been staunchly defending its size and saying it wasn't).

God it all seems so real now. And all I can hear is Boyzone ringing in my ears....

I'm 12 weeks tomorrow <wibble> thankfully I have another scan next week because I've got the full metal jacket on.

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 19:56:28

Wolf whistling at 12 weeks

wilderumpus Wed 06-Jun-12 20:00:51

12 weeks hurrah state smile

wilderumpus Wed 06-Jun-12 20:07:42

midget how did you keep it a secret until 20 weeks? With my mc-pg I looked reet preggo at just 10 weeks blush had a nice little pot (and not even a baby in it!) - I can't imagine how sizeable i would have been at 20 weeks! So happy for you that you have managed to make it 'public' with your dd and very pleased she is so excited smile What loveliness smile

Am thinking i might not ttc this month and give myself more time to heal from the mc and get back to 'normal' sad Heart says yaya baby! Head says noooo, you will just metal too much. hmmf. If anyone wants to reassure me that I can get preggo and be normal i would be very grateful (though better be quick as I will ov at the weekend, thanks) grin

<Bangs phone on table> that only posted some of my message.

Its also would have been my Grandmas birthday tomorrow.

I'm getting aches around my hips and umm fanjo but I've done a bit of walking today, I dared look in babies r us so now I'm freaking out that the next scan will be mmc.

MarthasHarbour Wed 06-Jun-12 21:21:12

ah state big bear hugs for your grandma's birthday tomorrow, shall we all join in a chorus of 'cancer is a cunt' at a certain time? hmm

blue has had her baby and i am embarassed to say i cant remember his name blush but it was beautiful - oh oh it was Maxwell grin

midget hoo-bloody-rah for an excellent consultant, i should get the same one i had with DS and-not that bitch who broke my waters with a machete, if i ever set eyes on her again i will fucking kill her er yes, where was i? lovely consultant! hmm

<losing the plot>

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 21:22:05

blush and stupid. I remember baby blue.

leedy Wed 06-Jun-12 21:29:06

Totally understand all the head-wrecking - really think I won't relax this time until there's an actual born baby. I have already managed to metal myself up good-oh over my stupid blood pressure (which when last checked is still hovering just around the "tiny bit higher than normal" mark), as I am now convinced that all random wooziness is a result of it suddenly going insanely high despite the fact that it's been the same for weeks, and that I am going to explode/develop placental abruption/etc.

In to GP tomorrow for more BP checking anyway, have ordered home BP monitor. GP tried different BP meds on me last week which made me keep nearly fainting so told to stop them. Dr Google (the reputable end, like, proper medical journals) informs me that there is almost certainly no need to medicate preggo BP if it stays at my level anyway so I am hoping my "look I will do my monitor every day until I see the specialist" stratagem will work. Wish doctors would stop freaking out over it as it is not helping my attempts to be positive! and calm!

Piemistress Wed 06-Jun-12 21:45:39

Great to hear your consultant was positive midget, hopefully your mind will be in a better place and you can get a decent nights sleep! I didn't tell anybody about this pregnancy until 20 weeks although it was quite obvious!

It's two weeks tomorrow till my CS. Cue major metalling!!!!

I think poppyjen might be after me? I did see baby had posted on a thread in pregnancy and asked her to pop over and see her old chums on is thread as am sure she is due any date now but I haven't seen a post from her. Does the stats thread get up dated with arriving babies?

Also adding that cancer is indeed a cunty cunt! Horrible, evil, cruel disease that I wish would fuck right off!!

Congrats on12 weeks state xx

kirrinIsland Wed 06-Jun-12 22:33:18

Wow! 7+4s and 12 weeks - time is flying smile

midget glad you have seen the consultant so quick and that it's helped calm you down a bit. Your hospital sounds ace, and it can't hurt to ask for a 3D scan - the worst they can say is no?!

wild I wish I could reassure you that you could just get pregnant and be normal, but I think worrying is inevitable sad Having said that, I wanted to get there straight away and I honestly don't think that waiting a month or 2 would have made much difference.

How long do you have to keep the GPs at bay for til you see your specialist leedy ?

<hands round cherry cake to go with the lashings of Ginger beer>

Midgetm Wed 06-Jun-12 22:41:47

I have got pregnant straight after MC and also waited. All good choices at the time but I hate to depress you but I have metalled with both. however if your head says wait, then listen to it. You know what is best.

Why did I just google images of amniotic bands? Hoping to see ultrasound pictures to reassure myself some more. This is not what I got. Stupid fecking me needs google stripped off my phone. will be stepping away from google for some time and just coming here for loving strokes.

Night night all. you raise me up, so I can do something on mountains-

JaffaSnaffle Wed 06-Jun-12 23:41:11

midget, so glad you got to talk to your consultant today. I hope they have helped you feel a bit calmer. Will you have additional scans etc going forward? I dont know about amniotic bands, but they don't seem to be worrying in your case, so that is A Good Thing.

wild I agree with all that has been said on trying again. After my first mc, in the wtf cycle, I was totally obsessed with getting pg again. It was both a physical and mental thing. But I couldn't, because of big family commitment 9 months later. Then, the next month I felt much calmer and felt like I needed to have a break from it.
Second mc, I just wanted to get pg straight away.Both were hard in different ways.

I have a bit of good news. I had an unmistakeable kick from her today. I was listening to Nina Simone. She must like jazz.

wilderumpus Thu 07-Jun-12 07:06:21

marnin' all

<lays out strong filter coffee, steaming pot of tea, toast and jam and er, some peanut m and ms>

I need sugar and caffeine - DS went to sleep at 4pm last night - 4 - so was up very early this morning, and DH and I took advantage of having 'no' DS and had some booze... sleeeepy.

Thanks for counselling me smile I have decided to be grown up and wait! Dh and I chatted last night and he wants two weeks notice at least to stop any booze and eat right and make a good healthy baby, which is grand. So we aren't in it this month but will be wonderfully committed next month and I cannot wait. i need to get back into my work so when I do get pg I will either have finished and be a SAHM or be comfortable enough with deadlinbes that if I need time to metal I can. Look after mesen like.


yay for a proper kick jaffa! that's amazing! smile

CheapTarnishedGlitter Thu 07-Jun-12 08:13:03

Good morning everyone... Little bit sad to be wondering in here but have read through a few pages and this looks like a safe place!

bit of background... started ttc at the end of January this year (was on injections, then pill for a year while they wore off, stopped pill at new year and got first period end of Jan). Started getting some spotting in early May, way too soon after last AF for it to be happening again so suspected ov or implantation bleed - faintest bfp confirmed implantation. Then continued spotting for 24 days - was certain that something wasn't right but doc just said keep testing and if it's still positive at 6/7 weeks call the mw. Last Thursday it stopped and had two brief days of thinking I might be able to enjoy the pregnancy when bam, heavy heavy bleeding and mc started on saturday morning.

Feeling so gutted and bewildered. At the moment I just want to try again asap - it felt like it took so long to get a bfp this time around. I know in the scheme of things four cyclesisn't too bad, but I was already quite depressed whenever AF arrived (especially I think as I'd gone for years without having it because of the injections) and I don't think I can take month after month of it again. Adding in extra months while we wait seems unbearable at the moment. But I think DH will want to be sensible about it.

Not helped by friend who is trying to be helpful but is bugging me at the moment. She had a mmc earlier in the year so for the most part has been incredibly supportive - however it feels as though she's being a bit self-righteous about waiting three months before ttc again because she has, and it's the right thing to do etc etc. I don't think she gets where I'm coming from because she got a bfp pretty much as soon as she started ttc last time around.

Sorry for the big whinge - not a great introduction blush Let's say I'm anticipating lots of metalling about getting "back to normal" never mind about ttc.

Maybe some of wilde's coffee will help if there's any going spare? Also seeing above that some of you are pg again, and some are very nearly due is encouraging.

waves and crosses fingers that she hasn't sounded completely whingey

ConfusedMumDotCom Thu 07-Jun-12 08:45:58

Hi Cheap welcome to the thread ((hugs)). I'm do sorry that you had to join us, mcs are rubbish, but the ladies here are lovely.

MarthasHarbour Thu 07-Jun-12 09:35:16

jaffa whoop whoop on a kicking girl! maybe she is going to be a champion kick boxer or World Cup women's rugby/football grin

<confiscates midgets phone/ipad/computer> will you get the fuck off google woman!!! you will not be told will you angry wink

wild me and DH do that sometimes, we will never learn, if DS goes to bed early you do not drink wine as you will have poorly headness when they wake up at 4am!! grin i remember once when DS was poorly he went to bed at 3.30pm but did actually sleep till about 7am - that was one lucky night!!

cheap welcome but sad for your MC. You dont have to wait 3 months, you can start right away in the WTF cycle, but be prepared that it could take months, IKWYM about getting blue everytime AF arrives. OTOH it could happen right away. Whatever happens just settle down with some of wilds brew and - M&Ms? hmm

Ladies i have a doofus question, at my scan tomorrow i will be somewhere between 7+4 and 7+6 coz-i have manipulated the stats and said i am 7+6 so am going with it if all goes well will i see anything? i know i should see a heartbeat but will there be any shape of a foetus??

<gulps down decaff brew and pours another>

martha you might see a sort of blob with little buds. I had one at 6weeks which was literally a blob and then one at 9 weeks which looked like a jelly baby!
There is a good section on the Baby to See website which shows scans at different stages which I was obsessed with at your stage! Be careful googling 'baby at 7 weeks' as I did that once and got some awful images from some nutty pro-life website, you can imagine what the pictures were of and it was pretty disturbing. Waves to everyone else!

wilderumpus Thu 07-Jun-12 10:22:30

<puts m and ms back in the cupboard and embraces new baby making healthy lifestyle>

<sneaks back for another m and m and thinks healthy lifestyles aren't suited to hungover tired mamas facing a morning at soft play>

martha I know, we never learn that unless someone is looking after DS in the morning there is no such thing as a night off! and oh a scan lovely lovely! good luck! I had a scan at 7 weeks with DS privately (to date pg, was all a surprise as was on pill) and he was a wee blob with a heartbeat. Nothing else, just a 1cm blob! Have it on dvd actually; now I see his huge 2 and a half year old, fireman sam obsessed self and watch that dvd and think... fuck me pregnancy is amazing when it bloody works Hope you are feeling ok about it...

welcome cheap. Am so sorry about your mc and the drawn out worry you must have had sad Try again whenever you are ready! in the wtf month I was gung ho for pregnancy again but after a month am now sort of more chilled and ready to put some distance between the mc and a new baby. Don't let your friend put you off what you want to do smile

pro life website pics far? <shudder>

Morning all

<hands out carrot cake muffins>

I originally found this thread after a MC in Dec at 9+5 weeks but the baby had died at 6+6. The thread moved really quickly and i wasnt able to keep up so i fell off and went quiet.

Well, 6 months later i'd like to re-join if i may. I just got a BFP on Saturday and am 5 weeks today and am metalling (or menkulling as we ESH say) like crazy.

I need reassurance from those who have had 1 MC and gone onto have a sucessful pregnancy and i need handholding a bit too.

Hope i'm allowed back smile

kirrinIsland Thu 07-Jun-12 10:53:06

Welcome cheap smile

MarthasHarbour Thu 07-Jun-12 10:54:57

waves to buggerlugs and welcome back - congrats on your BFP! i am glad you are here as you can answer a question for me - what the hell is an ESH? as in BESH and all that malarkey, i have wanted to join but just dont understand it all blush

kirrinIsland Thu 07-Jun-12 10:59:04

Cross post buggerlugs - welcome and congratulations smile . I have a 17 month DD and am 18 weeks pregnant. I lost my first and third pregnancies, so I am currently doing the pregnant after mc thing for the second time. You will worry more, it's only natural, but that's what we're here for! There is no reason why your pregnancy shouldn't be anything other than textbook so try not to let the metalling get out of control. I found having a couple of private scans in the early weeks very reassuring - I don't know if that's an option for you?

A BESH is a Baron Evil Selfish Hag
A PESH is a Pregnant Evil Selfish Hag
A CRESH is a Child Rearing Evil Selfish Hag

The thread (fred) came about after an article in the Daily Fail which basically said that all women who wait until they are over the age of 30 to have children are evil and selfish etc etc. Over the years we've become quite a group and we've had amazing highs and lows and supported one another through it all.

We have our own language (childish i know) - I shall explain:

Droid is our name for AF - Its an evil metal fucker
Fred is a thread
Menkulling is the head fuck associated with TTC or being pregnant
Diffed is pregnant

Our drink of choice is gin and our language is foul so if you think you'd fit it, pop on over.

(I have probably just revealed enough to be shot!)

Hi Kirrin - i'm planning an early scan. I'm seeing my GP on the 21st. I had an appt booked anyway before i got the BFP to discuss fertility and i've decided to keep it and try to pull at her heart strings to refer me for an early reassurance scan. If not, i'll pay for one. If it has died i'd prefer to deal with it in a medically managed way rather than having to take 2 weeks off work again and everyone knowing. One i can deal with, 2 will just make people look at me like 'that'.

MarthasHarbour Thu 07-Jun-12 12:20:05

oo buggerlugs i like the sound of this place, i am sure i will settle in there nicely! smile

thanks for clarifying that, i now see where the term comes from bastard-daily fail

You can't just turn up you know martha you need to find, complete and submit the BESHtionairre but its not hard to find.

leedy Thu 07-Jun-12 14:35:01

I am delighted to be a PESH! Look at me, selfishly gestating at nearly 40 with no consideration for the rest of society etc. etc. WHO DO I THINK I AM? Should I not have retired to cronehood by now?

Welcome back and congrats, buggerlugs, and welcome cheap! I didn't wait three months either, fwiw - didn't go for it the first month because I had a chest infection and then got pregnant our second month trying.

And hoorah for the kicking mini jaffa cake! Sorry if I have failed to namecheck everyone, I am trying to concentrate in an office where the heating seems to be set on "suffocate".

Arf at leedy - Do you drink gin too?? You'd fit right in!!!

Thanks for allowing me back. I'm just awaiting a phone call from my GP to see if i can get a referral for an early scan. I'm only 5 weeks todaybut have realised that when i am not busy, the evil metalling creeps in and makes me feel really scared. When i'm walking the dog, or at work and busy etc i feel really calm about it all. <makes note to walk legs off dog>

My DH is home tonight after a few days away so hopefully that will help keep me busy and distracted.

MarthasHarbour Thu 07-Jun-12 14:48:33

i am definitely a PESH - like leedy i am cracking on 40 (in fact bambino is due 2 weeks before my 40th - thats Bruges out the window then angry )

leedy Thu 07-Jun-12 15:28:18

I blame my ovaries for not withering and falling out when I hit 30 like the Daily Fail says happens to "selfish career girls".

leedy Thu 07-Jun-12 15:30:19

In other news, I am now the proud owner of my Very Own Blood Pressure Monitor! We metalling pregnoes really know how to party...

Spoke to my Dr, she was really nice and did the referral with me on the phone. I'll get a letter for an appt when i'm past 7 weeks for an early scan.

Now all i have to do is hide here under this rock and pretend its not happening for 2 weeks until then smile

leedy Thu 07-Jun-12 16:01:22

<passes chocolate under the rock for buggerlugs>

squeakymac Thu 07-Jun-12 16:27:04

Welcome cheap and buggers! Sorry to see you here but heres hoping for BFPs soon - if it happened once it can happen again for us all! I'm 6+1 now after MC last March at 6 weeks and I have to say everything feels better this time, tests getting stronger, various symptoms present and correct, all v reassuring but not stopping the metalling...hmm

Love love loving all the positive scans, heartbeats and kicks that are floating around the place martha midget jaffa et al sorry I know have left people out but its so hard to keep up ye're all serious chatterboxes!

Weeeell I've been off work for the last couple of days because of horrible back pain and resulting lack of sleep, had to leave work early on Tuesday to go to see a physio - amazing what prego hormones can do to destabilise one's pelvis and cause resulting muscle spasm, apparently, not pleasant at all! Seriously metalling as as well as plain paracetamol I took solpadeine twice and rubbed deep heat on my back twice when the pain was at its worst. Hoping to just be able to manage with paracetamol from now on. Yuck.

squeakymac Thu 07-Jun-12 16:29:30

Duh so sorry buggers having trouble keeping up to the extent that I forgot you have had a BFP obvs congrats smile and apologies limps off to take some more paracetamol and pop another heat pack for her back in the microwave

Midgetm Thu 07-Jun-12 18:33:36

Buggers Welcome back and congratulations on your BFP. Ok am I a CESH and PESH, or am I just evil? If the cap fits as my old mum would say. I am probably the oldest fartiest person on here and will be (drum roll and gasp in awe at the old bearded lady) OK so I don't have a beard, not yet anyway, 41 when this little one is dragged from me.

leedy I am wolf whistling at your BP monitor. I have one too, someone gave it to me and I stay the feck away from it as it has much the same affect on me as Dr Google. I have been so busy working today that I have stayed away from Dr Google so metalling re band (it's a sheet, its a sheet, it's a sheet) limited to low level.

Squeakymac Sorry you are suffering from back pain - I also went a bit cold turkey from pretty strong painkillers and it was tough. Hope you get sorted.

Welcome cheap, sorry you have found yourself here. Do whatever feels right for you - your friend can only offer advice - you don't have to take it. First couple of times I MC I literally shagged my way out of it, it was kind of primal and helped me feel more in control. or something like that. My lovely DD was a product of the WTF cycle and rather smashing she is too.

Jaffa Hurray for mini jaffa booting you, long may she reassure her metalling mother with those karate kicks. I will be getting scanned every 4 weeks from here on in. Because of the band, because I is old and because I had PE. I am a high risk nightmare.

Well I told DD last night. Cutest moment of my life. She is beside herself. This pregnancy better bloody work as it is her little heart on the line now. She keeps listening, stroking, kissing my belly. Took the scan photo to bed so she could look after it. And I admitted to virtual strangers today that I was pregnancy. Get me.

Better go and feed the family.

Piemistress Thu 07-Jun-12 19:27:42

I am also an old hag!! Baby due few weeks before my 40th so have postponed my big New York ambition to the end of my 40th year!

Feeling sorry for myself. My period showed up today. Grand.

On the plus side, it's 28 days exactly since I miscarried so at least I'm regular...

wilderumpus Thu 07-Jun-12 19:44:13

hello buggerlugs! Congratulations on your pg! I just love, love, love all the pregnantness that is abounding on this board. Such a sad board but actually, a very happy one too smile

I'm knocking on at 33, selfishly have a child and a career (of sorts) and love gin. hurrah!

that is the cutest story midget. Bless your dd she sounds adorable.

sorry you are in so much pain squeaky! That sucks. but yay your pg generally 'feels' better than your mc pg (taking each day as it comes obviously...)

wilderumpus Thu 07-Jun-12 19:45:15

eek x post - so sorry to hear about AF backward sad have some wine

Cheers bud, have some cider chilling in the fridge. grin

leedy Thu 07-Jun-12 20:09:36

Awwww, midget, that story about your DD taking the scan photo to bed made me all teary.

Piemistress Thu 07-Jun-12 20:32:39

Is it time for an updated stats list?? Xx

I wrote a huge long post and mumsnet went offline <bangs phone on table>.

I need reasurance. --because I'm shit and can't make myself eat well <hides kebab from this evenings dinner>--

I had a scan at 10+6 nice wriggly healthy baby in there good HB. I have a scan a week today at 13wks. Still have symptoms etc but I'm metalling hard all will be over. sad

Midgetm Thu 07-Jun-12 22:44:20

state STOP IT. Do you have any good reason to think these thoughts apart from the metalling? Remember the metallers chant 'i am pregnant, today'. Repeat it, slap yourself and think positive. Consider yourself 'spoken to'.

squeakymac Thu 07-Jun-12 22:48:26

wilde goes without saying!

MissCoffeeNWine Thu 07-Jun-12 23:08:02

<sticks nose in door>

Hullo. Sorry I've been missing. Had a squizz through the posts, congratulations to all the BFPs good scans - state and martha and marbles etc and hello to all the new people, sorry you have to be here.

I can join the cancer is a cunt conversation having lost two grandfathers in their 60s to it, my mum in her 50s, and my cousin aged 13. It is a big cunt.

I can also join the time flies conversation - I'm 27 weeks pregnant shock. For anyone that doesn't know me I've had one baby and two losses at 14 and 17 weeks. And now this little kicky bean. No problems yet, but I'm still detached even with daily kicks. Have just started to get a proper bump though so that makes me happy. Now people can tell I'm less worried about the public bit and more like - finally. Although then I tell them I'm 6 months and they start telling me how small I am, which does not help the metalling at ALL. Why do people feel the need to say that hmm LittleMiss is kicking my waistband as I write she does not like me wearing jeans now, I might have to put them away for a couple of months and get something stretchy!

Good luck to all with upcoming scans and big fat BFP vibes to all the SWI-ers.

Thanks midge boobs hurt less that's all that's sending me crazy <slaps self>

Midgetm Fri 08-Jun-12 07:10:47

The boobs can be a bitch. They hurt sometimes more than others. Unless thet have gone down and are not sore at all please do not worry x

Hello everyone

Congratulations to all the new bfps and good scans

Glad your getting some strong kicks Jaffa

midgetm how cute that your dd is sleeping with the scan picture

MissC sounds like time to break out the stretchys

Well af is due Sunday, I had some spotting last weekend which is unusual for me. Also my boobs feel hard and bigger and I've been sick two days in a row. Maybe just wishful thinking!

The sale of the house we were buying has fallen through, we have decided to keep renting for a while. Unfortunately all the 4 beds have gone in the last week except an upside down house, which I'm not sure about.

leedy Fri 08-Jun-12 11:31:17

MissC, for jeans that are ALSO stretchy, I totally recommend these:

They're very low rise below the stretchy band bit so they don't dig in anywhere, they look like normal jeans, and THEY STAY UP. Bit pricey but insanely comfortable. I have one pair from when I was pregnant with DS and am ordering another pair. All other maternity jeans are rubbish.

Also, HA, medical profession, my new BP monitor shows that my blood pressure is in fact currently going down without any meds. It's still the high end of normal but better than my previous average.

Also also, I think I felt a kick! Amusingly, during Prometheus, which is possibly not the ideal film for pregnant ladies (if you've seen any of the Alien movies you will know why).

GrandPoohBah Fri 08-Jun-12 12:41:10

Afternoon all!

<lays out really greasy delicious fried egg and bacon sandwiches for brunch>

Just been catching up - not had much time for MN as I've been stepson wrangling this week as it's half term - been to the zoo (cost: £44, favourite activity 'jumping in the puddles!'), and Legoland (cost: £78, favourite activity 'splashing people on the rides!'). I think we're having a cheap quiet day today, we managed to wear him out so much yesterday that he slept all the way back in the car and from about 8.45 last night until 10.15 this morning - result!

Glad there has generally been good news for everyone - except for the fact that cancer is a cunt sad.

I'm 15 weeks today! Eek! I've definitely got some pot belliedness going on - DH thinks it looks like a bump, I think it looks like all my flab just being pushed forwards. I suspect it's a bit of both - but it makes it much easier to pluck my belly button hair when I'm laying on the sofa grin

Quick question - in a 'first' pregnancy (hollow laugh, but you know what I mean...) when might I be able to feel the baby? Am impatient now, I've stopped feeling ill and tired mainly, I just feel normal and fat - I want more 'proof' that there's something going on in there!

midge they're still tender and I get a shock if a dc leans on me.

I'm so tired though, I slept 11hrs yesterday, then napped for a few hrs in the afternoon and zonked out again for 11hrs last night. And right now I'm tired again! Thank goodness dp is off work, I'm doomed when he has his op and I need to look after him and the dc.

grand I felt ds and dd around 18-20wks I think <scratches head> its four years since I was last past the first trimester.

<Snatches bacon sandwich>

JaffaSnaffle Fri 08-Jun-12 15:01:55

GPB, I think a lot can vary from person to person and pregnancy to pregnancy. With my DD, it was 17 weeks. It was a very gentle feeling like bubbles popping inside. My placenta was at the back then. This time, 18 weeks. Only feeling hard kicks about once a day, and only low down, because my placenta is at the front.

leedy Fri 08-Jun-12 15:05:05

I think with DS it was around 18 weeks.

pebspop Fri 08-Jun-12 15:59:58

hey girls

i know manda is probably busy at the mo but maybe someone else can help with a b vits question.

i have been taking them for a few weeks now (b50) my wee was really bright yellow as first but now it is normal colour. does this mean i need to take more as the excess vits come out in the wee as the bright yellow colour. could i take two per day to make them up to a b100 or does it not work like that?

MumTumWanted Fri 08-Jun-12 16:15:29

Hey ladies

Just thought is pop on quick been trying to keep busy over half term .... Monday is my first day back after mmc and erpc. My boss has been great and we decided to tell people I had appendicitis and needed the op which accounts for the 3 weeks off I have had..... I'm dreading it .... 2 preg ladies one heavily with only couple of weeks til she on mat leave and one due nov. close to my would have been date.... Hoping I can be strong ....

Haven't got ability to name check but suffice to say im chuffed to bits for all those with good news and I'm joyous that some of our girls are now discussing maternity wear !!!! . gringringringrin

I'm now not allowed to ttc til I've had further tests I'm gutted really really gutted cos I just want to jump on dh and get baby making againblush but realistically I know it makes more sense to wait....
Shows how long ago we used condoms though dh gave me z lovely massage the other night which ended rather fabulously blush but we'd used baby oil being in the moment unable to find massage oil only realised afterwards that your not supposed to use this with condoms are u ?!?!? vaguely recalling sex education class at school blush so if by some miracle in my wtf cycle I do fall preg again I think I may self medicate with aspirin .......and metal like a good un.... I promise however to be more sensible now smile

Piemistress Fri 08-Jun-12 16:16:24

pebs I noticed the same with mine, I think it's just your body getting used to it? I took 50mg of B6 all the way through conception and 1st tri then weaned myself off to 10mg which is in pregnancy vits. I think a lot of people take 100mg of B6 but I was happy on 50mg x

Piemistress Fri 08-Jun-12 16:18:41

grand it depends on where your placenta is - if it's anterior (front) then you won't normally feel movements till later on. With DS I had an anterior placenta and felt bubbles at about 19w/20w. This time round it's posterior and I felt the movements much earlier x

MarthasHarbour Fri 08-Jun-12 16:40:45

ladies just got time for a quick mememe post blush but just wanted to say that i had scan this morning and we saw a heartbeat grin grin we were soooo happy, also saw a vague outline of the foetus grin

am a bit puzzled by the dates though, i reckon i am somewhere between 7+4 and 7+6, the screen said 7+2 and she put 7+1 in my notes - then said that they dont date scans before 10 weeks confused i just dont want them to fuck up the dates for the nuchal scan and do it too late... hmm

high fiiiives missc you are in your third trimester!!

<hugs> to mumtum

sorry for lack of namecheck but have a sleepy DS on my lap!

squeakymac Fri 08-Jun-12 16:56:27

mumtum good luck going back to work your boss sounds like a v supportive star!

martha how fantastic to have seen a HB! V envy!

Constant metalling going on here as essentially everything for back or any other type of pain is not a good idea in the first trimester including heat packs which I thought as they're non-medicinal would defo be safe. I'm a doc (not anything to do with babys / ladys though) and I know that based on the evidence codeine is safe, but still not comfortable exposing my own little bean to it...confused

Midgetm Fri 08-Jun-12 17:09:11

Heartbeats are lovely. grin

I find them more emotional than actual babies on scans. Cried like a baby when I saw DD's heartbeat. Not so bothered at the 12 or 20 week scan for some reason but beside myself with her little heartbeat.

I may have a little sob for Maratha's HB.

MissCoffeeNWine Fri 08-Jun-12 17:18:13

I agree, lovely heartbeats. Better than the grainy blob shape, that little flicker. And even when I'm sat in the waiting room feeling the baby batter my insides and watching my belly jump up and down I still get a awwww moment when the I hear the HB at the appointment! Lovely news martha

Thanks for the stretchy pants tip! I'm going to try and stick to my leggings and dresses for a bit and see how I get on. Feel a bit indulgent buying something only to be used for the next 3 months. Yes that does feel weird to write!

Am I in the third trimester? My preg calculator doesn't switch to it until 28+1.

Midgetm Fri 08-Jun-12 17:21:20

Anyone in the third trimester gets a good midget licking.

wishfulthinking1 Fri 08-Jun-12 18:50:21

Hi all-
I'm sorry for the radio silence- my wonderful DF took me away for a few days to get my head on straight again and he's just brought me a g&t in the bath- what a man!!

Thank you so much for all your kind word and thoughts. I really am beginning to feel better and am able to be a bit more 'well, the baby wasn't forming correctly so it wasnt meant to be' about it. We've decided not to tell my parents, there's simply no need to upset them. I'm sure we'll tell them one day, when I'm preggo again, but for now, it'll just cause unnecessary upset.

We've got so much to look forward to- ive got a wedding dress fitting tomorrow and then the wedding is just 6 weeks away- so, we'll get cracking with the ttc again straight away and fx for the next few months.

I know it's sometimes hard to find the positives in these situations but if I've learned anything it's just how wonderful my DF is. He's been a complete rock- truly- its brought us even closer so I feel blessed in many ways.

Being new to the thread it'll take me a while to figure out who's ttc, who's preggo and who has a newly delivered bundle of joy but I'm sure I'll figure it out.

Can't name check everyone but wanted to say hello to cheaptarnishedglitter- I think we were together on the may thread. So sorry to see you here- hope you're ok xx

Thanks again all xx

Piemistress Fri 08-Jun-12 19:31:29

Great news on the HB martha I record the heartbeat on my mobile phone smile

When I had an early scan at 9 weeks they out me at 9+6, then at my 12 week scan they put me at 13w which I was surprised at as I knew I didn't ovulate on cd7!! More like cd17 but not much I could do!! I think the Nuchal has to be done between 11 and 13 weeks, or something?? If your nuchal is done at about 12w by LMP then that should cover all bases?

Hugs for mumtum xx

misscoffee it seems like the weeks at going by so quickly, can't believe you are 6 months !!!

Only one or two more days left at work, can't wait!

kirrinIsland Fri 08-Jun-12 19:45:14

Great news Martha smile

GrandPoohBah Fri 08-Jun-12 20:01:28

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

I think DSS might have slapped cheek. He has a bit of a temperature and really really pink cheeks. And I'm getting a sore throat and headache.

Fuck. Who do I need to speak to to find out if I'm immune? There's nothing we can do if I'm not, mind... Fuck.

Piemistress Fri 08-Jun-12 20:24:41

Please please don't worry. It could be a number of things and not necessarily slapped cheek, how old is he? Could it be teething or earache? You can call your midwife and they might be able to check your booking in bloods for immunity, otherwise you can go in and they will take a sample for testing. Most pregnant women are immune, I had exactly the same thing about three months ago. If Your DS does have it and you aren't immune then they can send you in for regular scans to check blood flow but as far as I know chances of anything going wrong are slim (I googled this frantically when I thought DS had it). Do any of the kids he is in contact with having it? If not chances are it's not slapped cheek xx

GrandPoohBah Fri 08-Jun-12 20:34:38

He's four. In fairness he has been bouncing about like a mad thing all day but he's very flushed on his cheeks and has a temperature and stayed like that when he was sitting relatively still eating dinner. He says he feels 'fine' when asked, and doesn't seem to be unwell particularly. Plus he hasn't really been in contact with other kids since he finished school last thurs.

I'll ask the MW on Monday, but as I said - there's not much I can do either way. We'll see how he is tomorrow, it's just hard not to stress about it.

Thank you pie.

ConfusedMumDotCom Fri 08-Jun-12 21:01:25

Just popping in to say hi.

DH and I had a lovely day today - spending some time were it was just the two of us was just what we needed. Though I did feel guilty sending dd to nursery this morning.

I hope everyone else had a good day.

lays out tray of chocolates, fruit, wine, gin and non-alcoholic cocktails to welcome in the weekend

oo00PIXIE00oo Fri 08-Jun-12 21:10:33

Mumtum sounds like you have a boss like mine - the days I have had off after my mc have been forgotten smile she told everyone I was working from home - we finally got round to telling our respective families and was astounded by the support - given we are both 42 I thought the reception would have been a lot different - they are even fine with us trying again smile. I have mixed feelings though at first I though - ok I know I can get pg now lets try again - now I'm so scared of having to go through that pain again ( the emotional not physical) haven't told the OH as he is sooooo keen but I'm worried the dark hole I was in will return and I won't get out - this was my first mc - are these feelings normal?

Fab news on the scan Martha - Can't wait for mine as long as everything is ok that is.

Grand hope your LO gets better. I've never heard of slapped cheek.