Is anyone trying to 'time' their pregnancy to give birth at a 'good' time?

[HopingLovedTheSnow]

Hello!

Well, I guess the title says it all really...

DH and I have decided that next month is 'the' month when we are going to make a proper effort to TTC, but having checked due date calculators have realised that if we are successful next month this will mean me giving birth in Mid-November.

While giving birth at all will be an absolute delight, I can't help think that night-feeds/taking the DC out for walks etc will be a lot more pleasant in the spring/summer than it would be in the depths of winter.

I'm wondering if we shouldn't wait until June-ish to TTC (so that the DC would be born in the spring). I know that there is every chance that if we do TTC now, I may not actually C for a few months anyway, and then would kick myself.

I'm 30, and having used CBFM for the last 2 months seem to have regular cycle with predictable Ov.

I can't help but feel that we should just TTC and hope for the best, but several Mums have told me recently that having their DC in the summer was a lot easier than having them in the Winter...

Does anyone have any wisdom to share on this subject?

[ShowOfHands]

I wouldn't worry about it tbh. Because having a baby in spring/summer is lovely for the reasons you describe. But then you have a 6+ month old in the winter months and they get bored easily and my dd did not like bouncy chairs and gyms etc and wanted to be outside all the time. But if you have a newborn in winter, you want to get out and you worry about the baby getting cold and the rain and snow. And in the summer you worry about the newborn getting too hot/burnt. And then there's school dates. You don't want the oldest in the year, nor the youngest.

So, in conclusion, it doesn't matter. And it took me 14 months and a miscarriage to conceive (with a regular cycle and no fertility issues) so I couldn't have planned it anyway and just wanted a baby at some point after quite a lot of trying.

[northernlurker]

I've had a January baby - having decided to go for it at Easter and two spring babies - July conceptions. Spring is a MUCH better time. You can get out more, it's warmer at night so the baby doesn't get cold and wake, you don't need to wrap them up so much. Lighter mornings and nights make the nights shorter, you don't freeze when getting up to feed. Their first Christmas comes when they are big enough to slightly notice and you have a chance at outside birthday parties. There is a lot to be said for waiting imo. Depends how desperately broody you are?

[DecorHate]

Years ago when I was first thinking about having dcs and mentioned it to a nurse at the GPs she said I should get on with it right away (this was end of the summer) so that I would have a baby in Spring/early summer. I took her advice and did.

Of course there is then the downside of them being summer babies at school...

My sister had twins in October and I think she did find it hard being housebound a lot because of the weather.

Apparently the tradition of June brides is because if you got pregnant straight away you would have your baby in March and be heading into the summer...

But having said all that, as you say yourself, not everyone falls pregnant straight away (I didn't with dc2) so there are no guarantees...

[HopingLovedTheSnow]

Thanks for your replies..!

ShowofHands to hear of your MC, having reread my post I can see that I'm being a bit precious - having a DC at all would be a joy! Agreed that there isn't going to be a 'good' time with all things considered...

NorthernLurker Good point re broodiness - given that I had a near meltdown when DH announced that he will be away on business this week (OV week) I'm not at all sure that I will be able to wait until the summer. (fortunately managed to leave the room to have the said meltdown though - he doesn't need to see that!)

DecorHate Didn't know that about June Brides - does make sense though - DH has pointed out that there is a good reason why most animals give birth in the spring!

The other difficult thing is that with DH's work, there always seems to be some reason to postpone things (we married just before Christmas and have already delayed out HM for this reason). I fear that if we don't go for it now, then something will come along that will be a reason to delay...

DH (who is a bit older than me) seems to think that I will be perfectly fertile into my late 40s and doesn't seem to realise that there is a time limit on these things.

To be honest, I would prefer a spring/summer baby, but any baby at all would be wonderful.

[wilkos]

if i have another i am going to definitely have another summer baby, but for ME.

dd was born in August and I had a fab pregnancy with no colds/ sickness (prob. due to the time of year), only had to buy a few maternity t-shirts and my massively swollen feet were fine in flip flops

ds is due in march and I have been as sick as a dog all winter, maternity jumpers and coats cost a small fortune, due to my huge size leaving the house involves a vast amount of struggling with coats/ scarves/ hats and dd in same, and as for getting boots on...dear god its a trial

also with all the snow and ice it has been thoroughly crap!

but I am extraordinarily lucky (so far...) in being able to conceive when I want to, so that helps matters hugely

[frakkinaround]

I don't want a baby born between August and January because the French school system runs Jan-Jan and the English runs Sept-Sept, so yes I plan to 'time' it!

[skybluewinking]

I timed my son, I had a mc previously which would have been due in January, and the next time I could have conceived would have been an August baby. I was the youngest in my class, so didn't want a late summer baby.
I hung on, and was lucky enough to have my son in Mid Sept, worked perfectly, BUT, I do realise how lucky I am.
I did feel a bit about trying to plan it, as though I was courting disaster IYSWIM.

[jessplus2]

I had my first child late Dec (she's 7 now). I woke up in the dark, fed in the dark, and by 4.00pm it was dark again. I felt very depressed. We had to pack visitors in to see newborn before christmas, and I now get doubly stressed at Christmas (hope I don't sound too Bar Humbug). I can't help feeling I might have been less stressed in July! 2nd daughter was born in feb so not much change there. ttc #3 on and off for a year now however we will be omitting March! My birthday is christmas eve. Its even worse now I'm older. No one wants to go out because they're too busy getting ready for Christmas, and I feel terribly guilty going out for a celebratory drink (even when they're asleep) so I spent the last one at home with my 75 year old inlaws - great!

[RockbirdandHerSpork]

DD was a January baby and it was the most miserable time of my life. Newborn baby, pissing rain and freezing cold, central heating and lights on all day; hated it. But it was timed that way because of a holiday and the timing for maternity leave was fab; left just before Christmas, returned after Christmas a year later.

And all things being equal (yea yeah, I know!) we'll be doing exactly the same timings again this year... Things will get busy in April!

[hippopo]

I am expecting my first in early July and am quite pleased that it will be a summer baby and I can wear floaty dresses when really big. However we TTC for almost 2 years and I would have been happy to conceive at any time during those two years.

So if you are one of those lucky ones that conceives straight away then great but I would get cracking straight away, a baby is a blessing at any time of year.

Good luck

xxxxx

[Sarahlou8]

I have two Summer borns who were planned to the extent that there is just a week between their birthday's (two years apart though!!)

I was pg with no3 who would have been due in May, which was lovely, but wasn't meant to be.

We are now looking at a November birthday if I conceive this month, which I must admit, the dark mornings and cold weather doesn't appeal so much. I feel so much less tired in the summer months when it's light at 5am rather than dark mornings trying to drag myself out of bed at 7am!

However since my mc I now just feel that a baby will be a blessing, whatever time of year it's born. As has already been mentioned, I love the idea of a six month old enjoying the summer.

If age and circumstance were on my side, yes I possibly might wait though

Good luck x

[Alicetheinvisible]

With DD she was a bit of a surprise, and we were lucky in the fact she was born a day late which meant DH was able to have nearly 2 weeks off after she was born. It was lucky simply because the Autumn is the busiest time of year for DH at work but he has 2 quiet weeks in November and DD was born at the start of them.

This time we planned it carefully and if i hadn't of concieved when i did (2nd month of trying) we were going to have to wait until August before trying again. Baby no2 is due in August

[Alicetheinvisible]

Oh, and November was a great time, as we would go out in the mornings and then spend the afternoons cosied up on the sofa watching Midsummer Murders and getting to know each other without feeling guilty about being holed up inside when the weather was nice iyswim?

[DuelingFanjo]

I did. I tried to time it for some time in 2007.

Still trying. Doesn't always work out like you expect it to to be fair.

[TurtleGem]

Hi there, I was pg before at a "perfect" time - fell pg mid-June 09, was going to see my family (I live in France, family in Ireland) in September with hubby and in-laws, so perfect timing to tell everyone at the 3-month stage. Had also been thinking it'd be great to pop the sprog in March and have April, May, June and July maternity leave and then maybe take a month's hols in August as well, just in time for creche in September... Also, good friend was pg at exactly the same time. So, all was fine - til the MC in late-August... Now we're just shgging all over the place, not trying for a "perfect" time - just wanting to get pg asap... Ah well... It'll come...

[lucybrad]

wish I could time it - my body has other ideas!

[mrswill]

I 'timed' my DD, as I always wanted an August baby, and got one. I have my birthday in August and have always loved it, as it is sunny, and people tend to be in a better mood .

We'll be trying for DC2 from this August onward, so dc2 will hopefully have a spring summer birthday. But seeing as I got what I wanted last time, I doubt it'll be so easy now, given Im older and had a complicated section last time. So we'll have what we're lucky enough to get!

[squishy]

I had my first in November - it was all fine, really, but would have loved a summer baby - last time, we conceived within 6 weeks of trying; this time I was trying for a summer baby, we've been trying since October but no luck yet! Guess planning doesn't always work!!