Can't handle the tww anymore! Help!

(18 Posts)
cative Mon 12-Sep-16 17:14:56

Hello,

I'm totally fed up of ttc! Or rather, the tww. Every single tww I will have some sort of early pregnancy symptoms and of course it turns out I'm not pregnant. This month (at 6dpo) I'm nauseous and have lower back pain. I know its too early for this to actually be a symptom and it'll just be due to normal hormones but it still makes me think about it. I just want to get through the tww without googling every odd feeling I get! By this point I've googled some strange things!

We've been ttc for about 15 months now. The only time I've gotten pregnant it was ectopic (no risk factors, just unlucky) it partially ruptured and I lost a fallopian tube.

So I just need someone to tell me how to stop thinking about getting pregnant. Because having had various tests - and everything coming back normal - the drs best guess is that its my thinking about it too much that's causing the problem!

Thanks for any input!

EmmaWoo1605 Mon 12-Sep-16 19:53:39

Hi cative
I can totally sympathise...I'm currently about 7 or 8 dpo on cycle 9 and have had every symptom you could imagine. Nausea, slight cramping (almost like a pulling sensation), bit of back ache, some very light spotting, exhaustion, headaches...and probably others I'm forgetting! It's absolute torture! Dh keeps telling me not to build my hopes up like I do every cycle cos I always end up disappointed and upset. If only it were that easy! I don't think it's possible to forget about ttc...when you want something so badly it consumes you totally (I know, I'm there!). Maybe book a holiday or something, then you can guarantee, Sod's law, it'll happen!!

Xxx

cative Tue 13-Sep-16 13:06:12

A holiday sounds like a great idea!

Funny enough all my "symptoms" have gone today - I prefer that for sure. I've had so many disappointments now that I don't want any reason to get my hopes up!

Good luck with this month. Its so hard not to get your hopes up, especially with all those symptoms but I've got my fingers crossed for you. x

MrsCW86 Tue 13-Sep-16 13:56:10

I probably can't help on the 'how not to google everything' front as I'm really terrible for it, but didn't want to read and run!

Doesn't help that alllllllll early pg symptoms are basically the same as pms symptoms and no matter how much reading you do the conclusion is always doing a hpt after a missed period sad

I'm in tww as well and symptom spotting like mad - backache, funny feeling in tummy, the taste of blood in my mouth (furious googling has now convinced me I have gum disease or am in liver failure) and random dizzy spells.10dpo and bfn this morning, although I know it's still early can't help feeling disappointed.

Fx for you both though, it has to happen sooner or later flowers

sadsausage Wed 14-Sep-16 05:20:12

I'm the same - every month I spot things that aren't there. This month I felt like we timed it really well and yet I can't help but feel a bit depressed because it's 9dpo and I'm not experiencing any symptoms at all... couple of aches and pains which I know believe are always there but we only really notice when we are in this desperate phase. Fingers crossed.

delilahbucket Wed 14-Sep-16 11:52:44

Can't offer advise, but you're not alone. Cycle 17 we're on. Dp has antisperm antibodies.
Had two holidays and two mini breaks, tried getting plastered, tried going sober, legs up, no legs up, every position known to man, opks, temping, no temping or opks, preseed, conceive plus, no lubricants at all. The lost is endless. Dp is on Wellman and is about 45 days into those. I'm on coq10. Dp is cutting booze right back this week for three months.
It consumes me and I wish I could stop it. Ever since being told of DP's issue and being told our only real hope of conception is icsi (to the tune of about £4700) I've had anxiety related breathing issues. It's driving me insane as I just can't go on like this, but I suppose there's no going back.

cative Wed 14-Sep-16 14:32:28

MrsCW86 and sadsausage, thanks for your replies. Its really nice to speak to people who understand how difficult this is! I think the strangest "symptom" I've googled convinced it must be pregnancy related was a menthol taste in my mouth! I'm actually surprised I didn't find that people had this in early pregnancy as it seems like like practically EVERYTHING could be a symptom!

Deliahbucket, im so sorry to hear about your situation. I can only imaginw how difficult it must be for you. Are you in the UK? And the treatment isnt available on the NHS? How frustrating. And of course the situation only gets more stressful as long as it goes on.

I too have tried every alternative approach to conceiving. Ive overexercised and tried to do less exercise. Last month I ate oily fish everyday! I like fish but that was too much! I also tried grapefruit juice for quite a few months but got bored of that. I've just started drinking again having given it up for over a year (more for weight/health rather than TTC). This month my approach is to do nothing I don't want to in an attempt to reduce stress. So apart from ttaking prenatals Im doing nothing.

Thank you all for the replies. I'll be rooting for you this month. x

Umlauf Wed 14-Sep-16 14:44:36

Hello. The TWW is awful.

I've just tortured myself for the second time this cycle with an HPT on CD20.

I really thought I ovulated on CD 12 though, based on EWCM alone, so I'm feeling like I'm probably out.

I caught first cycle with DS so I'm irrationally ragey.

MissMagpie Wed 14-Sep-16 17:48:34

Hello everyone! I am with you all in the tww hell! It is impossible not to read every symptom and more as the evidence of what we want to happen.

I usually have a 5 week cycle but last month had a 4 week cycle and am now not sure when I should do my test.

I have been extremely tired and my boobs definitely feel heavier than usual buy I don't know if it is just the combination of hormones and life that is tricking me again.

Anyone want to offer any advice on when I should do the poas? I don't know if I prefer the hoping or the opportunity to move on until next month!

MrsCW86 Sat 17-Sep-16 07:35:28

What dpo are you on magpie? If you usually have 5 week cycles I personally would see last month as an anomaly and test once your 5 weeks are up. My cycles vary as well, but average out at 32 days so that's what I aim for when testing!

What cycle are you on now umlauf? I think irrationally ragey is allowed!! I have that every week it seems so I'm glad it's not just me!

Cative a month of oily fish sounds hardcore! Hats off to you Mrs, that's some serious dedication to the cause!

Delilah you deserve some sort of medal! If you don't mind me asking, what are the chances of you conceiving naturally? That sounds a lot for icsi if you have to pay all that, and so unfair if you can't get it on the nhs. But you've got this far and, as disheartening as it has been so far, it just means you are closer to having what you want flowers

Sadsausage have you had any more symptoms now that you are a few DPO further?

MissMagpie Sat 17-Sep-16 12:01:29

Thanks Mrs. I am not sure how many dpo I am because I was on holiday and decided just to relax and not obsess about the ewcm situation like usual, and I can't remember exactly what days there was more. I haven't ever done the ovulation tests though may start soon...

I poas at what would have been 29 days after my last af and it was negative but I think this was way too early for me.

I am now 31 days into my cycle and yday my boobs were massive and tingling all day plus I had the odd cramping feeling and pain in my lower back on one side.

Today I am not feeling any of that especially but still no sign of AF.

Hmph. Not going to test again unless I get some really obvious symptoms or else will wait until my proper AF due date.

Anyone else had any poas results?

EvieSparkles0x Sat 17-Sep-16 13:35:45

Hi smile

Hope you all get your BFPs soon.. I'm in the same boat with the 2WW but I wasn't actually planning on getting pregnant!

I'd missed a few days of my POP pill (which I believe I was still ovulating on) during the craziness of moving house but we were still DTD as I genuinely lost track of how many days I'd missed. Fast forward over 2 weeks since then to a couple of days ago, and I had what I first assumed was the beginning of my period, but was only a very very light spotting when I wiped.

I'm now symptom spotting like crazy! I've been constipated since noticing the spotting (which I never am), and have had cramps but no period has come. It's agony waiting, I told myself and OH that I wouldn't test til the 29th, but I literally can't stand the wait and have sent OH out to get a test, which I'll hopefully be able to leave til tomorrow but who knows!

Really, really cannot stand the thought of having to wait.. And the other thing that sucks is that as I've been on the pill I haven't been tracking my periods and can't for the life of me remember when the last one was, have a funny feeling it must have been around 4 weeks ago though!

Chinnygirl Sat 17-Sep-16 13:45:47

I actually get more stressed doing an early pregnancy test than just wait and see. Am I the only one? Have been ttc with fertilitytreatments for 3+ years so maybe I've just done it too often?

The times I got pregnant (miscarried them all) I was pretty convinced AF was coming. Either I am pregnant or I'm not. And if pregnant I still have to wait if it stays or not. Time will tell.

haveacupoftea Sat 17-Sep-16 13:53:57

I am on 7DPO and am just in bed depressed which is not like me at all. I am finding the tww very hard this cycle.

EvieSparkles0x Sat 17-Sep-16 14:20:52

I definitely see where you're coming from Chinnygirl, it probably would be much more relaxing to just wait, but I have so many variables and questions since I wasn't planning on getting pregnant (My DD has only just turned 1).

If I was planning maybe I would have more discipline, but knowing me I doubt it!

So sorry to hear about your difficulty having a baby flowers, I can understand that also probably means it's not so exciting to get a positive result so early on. Really hope you have some good news soon flowers

MissMagpie Sun 18-Sep-16 13:44:27

I'm out. AF arrived today. Weird mid length cycle for me but never mind!

cative Sun 18-Sep-16 14:15:58

Good luck for next month MissMagpie.

I think I'm out too but I still have a high temp so will know for sure tomorrow (since my ectopic when, I had AF despite being pregnant, my temp is the only sign I trust to tell me I'm definitely out - it adds to the stress somewhat!).

Good luck to everyone still in!

EvieSparkles0x Sun 18-Sep-16 19:03:23

Ergh I hate this, wasn't supposed to test until the 25th at the earliest and couldn't wait even one day! Got a bfn which I cried about (ridiculous as not planned) and then tested in the morning and got what could possibly be a very faint bfp :O :O

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