Um hello, newbie, ttc, needing a place to talk to people :)

(1000 Posts)
Fruityb Sun 05-Jan-14 20:23:56

I've been reading the site for ages but decided to sign up as need an outlet and place to talk as ttc is quite secret and it's not something I have loads of people I could talk about it with. Plus I'm quite shy and my ovaries aren't something to bring up at social gatherings!
I'm 31, came off pill in October and me and boyfriend have been ttc since. I didn't know how long it would take to get back to normal as had been on pill for eleven years. Turns out it took four weeks, and am now on third AF since coming off, so annoyingly normal in one way! I'm getting my head round all this tracking stuff but don't want it all to get clinical with the fella as it takes the fun away!
So just wanted to say hi and hopefully share in people's stories. It's not all as straightforward as I always thought, and I'm always the one that would start panicking something was wrong with me. I'm pleased I found somewhere I can just write it down if nothing else.
So, hi, and hopefully can take some good advice away.

CunfuddledAlways Sun 05-Jan-14 20:28:53

i had my implant out end of october and my periods whaere also back to normal straight away also not tracking but log my period start and end dates on an app as it tells me when the next one is due. I already have 2DD's (4and2) but would like a third

MooMa1d Sun 05-Jan-14 20:31:07

Hi Fruity, welcome

I too am TTC, total planner and hate to not be in control so naturally this process is quite taxing as I have no say in it other than when to DTD!!

Fruityb Sun 05-Jan-14 20:49:42

I've got an app that I've been adding when my periods were and it had today as my due date so it must be working ok! It's got ovulation days on so know as and when to get, well you know lol. I was always very regular before going on the pill, some things seemingly don't change.
We talked about this for so long, and I'm very impatient which isn't helping! Smoking has gone, am trying to keep healthy and I don't really drink a lot, so feel I've made some reasonable steps so far. I'm getting a little hooked on symptom checking, even down to the stupidest things like hiccups! That's really something I have to stop as it would appear you can put anything in Google and it'll tell you you're pregnant. I don't think I'm alone in that but I really need to stop.

MooMa1d Sun 05-Jan-14 21:00:04

You sound just like me.... today I've had backache and tummy ache consistent with when I'm due on BUT I'm nowhere near being due on - only just finished ov'ing.

So keep thinking - can I just feel myself ov'ing
Or is it implantation
Or did I eat too much yesterday
I've been weeing more.... but I've been drinking more.

It's like having phantom symptoms and I'm desperately trying to ignore it all because if I get a BFN it'll just be all the more disappointing.

You're right. Everything on google could mean you are, or aren't pregnant. Hell, if I googled my husband is farting more than usual, am I pregnant I'm sure it'd say yes shock

I can totally sympathise

Fruityb Sun 05-Jan-14 21:11:02

It's completely bonkers isn't it! I've been cramping today, sore books all week, having crazy dreams... but AF came today so that's what all the signs were. I knew that is what it was all about and would not allow myself any thoughts otherwise unless it was a week later.

Not this month, but it will be one I'm sure…

CunfuddledAlways Sun 05-Jan-14 21:54:06

i do this too, i have only just ovulated according to my period thing but now im like oh my boobs hurt oh i need a wee etc etc drive myself crazy!!

Helen87 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:34:11

Hi everyone, I'm in the same boat, this is our first month properly TTC first baby. Came off the pill end of October, it took about 8 weeks to have a period, which lasted for 11 days on and off and since I've had loads of spotting etc and I am constantly symptom spotting for everything!! My periods were always regular before I went on the pill but that was 10 years ago and I was only 15 so no idea how things are now. Hoping I get lucky and either get a BFP this month or AF on time...

I like this thread because everyone is just starting to TTC. Be nice to hear all of your stories, good luck everyone smile

Honeybear30 Sun 05-Jan-14 22:53:19

Hi everyone. I'm in a similar boat to. Came off pill October, in the third cycle now and just ovulated (based on my own observations/pain). I've found this board really helpful as our TTC is top secret to. One friend knows but only because she is TTC as well. But she is further down the road than us and I can't talk to her about it all that much. I even worry that I might get pg first and she would find that hard. I thought that we'd just be seeing how it goes to start with but it is so easy to obsess! I can't get babies off the brain! Anyone else find this since they made the decision to try?

MooMa1d Sun 05-Jan-14 23:02:13

Yup - I keep thinking about babies since we decided to start.

Thing is when I was younger I just thought you "did it" and voila a baby. Didn't realise it was a short 4/5 day window out of a WHOLE SODDING MONTH in which to attempt to conceive.

Helen87 Sun 05-Jan-14 23:11:37

Totally agree with both. Originally weren't meant to be trying until March and now we've started I can't think about anything else!! It is crazy when you think you spend all your younger years trying not to be pregnant and being scared about accidentally getting pregnant!!

Has anyone started with the temperature taking and OPKs etc yet?!

Ladymillion Mon 06-Jan-14 08:16:02

Hey everyone, I'm new to this too TTC #1, CD37, numerous BFN's no AF yet! (Not sure of actual cycle length, first month of TTC and never took any notice of cycle length before)

I feel the same in terms of lack of knowledge growing up; when I was at school they made out that the first time you have unprotected sex will be the time you become pg! So I went on the pill, waiting for 'the right time' and it suddenly dawned on me last month (I'm 28) that I don't have a lot of time left! I too never realised there was only a minuscule small window of opportunity once a month!

So I can relate to being suddenly consumed by all this - worrying if I've left it too late, wondering if I'm fertile at all, scared that even if I am then it might take years to conceive etc, it's madness.

Here's hoping that 2014 is a good year for all of us gals TTC smile

Ladymillion Mon 06-Jan-14 08:20:39

Oh and Helen I've purchased an OPK ready for my next cycle! Anxious about using this too haha! 'What if I don't ovulate at all?' �� 'ssaaaaakkkee!

Helen87 Mon 06-Jan-14 08:47:56

Hi Lady! Have you just come off contraception as well?

Haha I am exactly the same, I've convinced myself that there are loads of things wrong and I'll never have a baby, despite the fact this is only our first proper month of trying!

I have bought some too but not really sure how they work or if it's too late this month to start testing etc and like you say if it's just more worrying and stress for no reason?!

Ladymillion Mon 06-Jan-14 09:10:02

Well I was on the pill for years, then for the last, maybe 2-3 years I stopped taking it (after hearing stories from friends about it messing with cycles when coming off it) and we just used condoms instead.

As for the OPKs... I have no clue when to start testing as I don't know how long my cycles are etc haha! Hoping AF turns up soon so we can start afresh! wink

weebairn Mon 06-Jan-14 09:17:30

Good luck fruity

I came off the pill after 17 years September 2011 and was pregnant by January 2012. I didn't do any charting, just had regular sex. The regular periods right away is a very encouraging sign! I didn't tell anyone either and it was a fun time in most ways, though by the last month I was getting a bit twitchy and worried (which is silly but natural). I hope you can relax and enjoy the sex and things will happen for you really soon.

Anyway I am TTC number 2 now so trying to take my own advice!

Helen87 Mon 06-Jan-14 09:31:23

Ah I wish I had of done that as well, it's so confusing not really knowing what's going on with my cycles on top of TTC! I worked out that it looks like I might have just missed a period because the second one was right in line when I would have expected a second period if that makes sense?!

I used to run a few packets of pills together so think there is any chance that could have made me miss a period?

Thanks for the advice weebairn, it's really nice to hear positive stories smile

weebairn Mon 06-Jan-14 09:39:08

helen It can often take a few months for your periods to regulate after taking the pill, but I don't think running the packs together would particularly affect anything (I did this for years too, only had a period every few months…) I think it sometimes just takes a bit of time to settle down.

There are a lot of distractions in Nov/Dec with xmas and so on, and January is so bleak and boring, and so it all becomes a bigger deal! That's my experience anyway.

I really hope it doesn't take a long time for any of you, but I also have friends who got pregnant after 11 months and a year and so on with no problems - unfortunately it is just sometimes a bit of a waiting game I guess. My philosophy is just to try and ignore it all (because you can't really control it, for all the hi-tech monitoring we can do now) and make sure you have enough sex and BE PATIENT. God if only I could take my own advice, this is my first month trying for number 2 after having my coil out and I am OBSESSED grin

Helen87 Mon 06-Jan-14 10:02:30

Ah right, just looking for any reason why it might be all over the place, but I think actually it's just one of those things isn't it! My sister came off the pill late October and found out she was pregnant early March so I know it can happen smile

You're right though, it is hard to be distracted! That's why I think the temping and the OPKs might be a bad idea for me and make me even more obsessed! Haha, I'm the same, it's so much easier to give out good advice than actually follow it!!

How old is your first child now?

KikiThePea Mon 06-Jan-14 10:08:28

Hi all,

Just thought I'd drop in and say hi! First month ttc and I very stupidly assumed I'd be perfectly reasonable about the whole process and not play symptom spotting (what a silly, naive girl I was...)

Only 7dpo at this stage and already behaving like a loon at the slightest niggle. To make matters worse, I'm sure I have a bit of a stomach bug, so of course every little twinge has me twitching in anticipation. Sigh.

I'm not the world's most overtly emotional person, but on Saturday I had what I can only admit to being a hysterical sobbing fit that left poor old husband looking somewhat stunned. This prompted the thought of 'maybe it's time you found other people to talk to' as we're also keeping it secret for the time being.

I'm prepared for a long road, but that sadly doesn't stop the constant hope (as I'm sure you all know!).

weebairn Mon 06-Jan-14 10:13:29

She is 15 months and lovely, a right little monkey. I had wanted a 3 or 4 year age gap originally… My thought process post-birth went like this

GETTING PREGNANT AGAIN WOULD BE THE WORST THING ON EARTH for 9 months, then, seemingly overnight: Christ I'm broody. grin

DP took a little longer to come around. Thankfully I had decided on a copper coil so fertility returns instantly when it's taken out… I'd LOVE to get pregnant this month!

I know charting would make me worse, so I'm not buying anything, and I only have one preg test in the house (leftover from a two pack I bought following rather foolish shag 3 weeks post birth!!!) and I will not test until period is a week late. Those are my rules! Still obsessing though grin

Oh and I also know plenty of people who got pregnant with very irregular periods. Keep shagging smile

weebairn Mon 06-Jan-14 10:17:28

Hi Kiki - you are in good company! DP cannot believe what a nutter I am being. Doesn't help my mates are telling me they're pregnant left right and centre at the moment!

Try and channel and enjoy the hope, making a baby should be fun (especially in the early days, I can't pretend to know how hard it is if you've been trying forever)… but I know it's easier said than done.

Helen87 Mon 06-Jan-14 10:30:22

Aw bless, congratulations smile Hahaha that's really funny, hormones are so crazy aren't they! Yeah I am going to try and leave any testing until a week after I would expect my period. Obsessively testing and seening negatives must really start to get to you! Haha I'll take your advice thanks smile Yeah, I think it must be really hard when you've been trying for a long time, but there's nothing to say that that will happen to any of us so it is really silly to start worrying now (easier said than done again though!)

Kiki- I have been near breakdown a few times, last week I threw myself face down on my bed to wallow in self pity. Probably looked like a toddler myself!!

It's definitely good to have people in similiar situations to talk to!

boumplj Mon 06-Jan-14 13:06:16

Hi everyone, this is my first post and me and my husband have only recently decided to try for our first baby. I came off the pill on 28 December and started bleeding on 1 January and finished my period yesterday. I have no idea what my cycle is as I've been on the pill for over 15 years.
Like many of you, I'm now obsessed and really want this to happen for us as soon as possible, although keep needing to give myself reality check as know these things can take time and being on the pill for so long I'm not sure how long it will take things to get back to normal.
I wish you all the best for 2014, lets hope it brings us all some very happy news x

lorelie Mon 06-Jan-14 15:06:28

Hi everyone, TTC #1, cycle 5. Having a bad time with periods since I came off the pill in April. I, like most of you, thought I would come off the pill and let my periods settle down for a few months before properly TTC, but they have gone from being on time each month and light flow, to absolutely no idea when they will start, soooo painful and heavy enough that one night I woke up and it was all over the bed (tmi I know). Also maybe naively thought it would happen pretty quickly, my best friend started TTC at the s time and got her BFP in November so I'm really getting obsessed about it now! Going to see the doctor on Wednesday to make sure everything ok, but in the meantime still plugging away lol. Never thought I'd say it but getting a bit bored of all the sex now lol

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