You are not alone. I had a missed mc too, in April this year at ten weeks. We had been trying since November but I knew the pregnancy wasn't right, I didn't feel good about it from the beginning. I opted for a D&C and was advised I could start ttc straight away. Here we are six months down the line and no BFP.
I have so many friends called preg recently and I'm breaking inside. It harming my marriage and making me so miserable.
The GP although understanding won't do anything. I've been going to Accupuncture but it seems to have not helped.
I really wish there was something I could do to help myself. I feel like I deserve this now....
RaRaz - yes exactly! the lack of control is horrible and the whole thing is really cruel. I am sorry to hear about your losses too.
I have been to see my GP, she was really kind actually. She did a cervical examination and referred me for a scan which is next week (she did these 'early' because I asked her to investigate the spotting I get every month before AF). I will go back again next month and ask for blood tests I think.
joycep - you're right about the pressure. I think we put pressure on ourselves but also all those who know about the miscarriage expect an announcement whenever they see us. Thank you for sharing those stories.
These forums are a lifeline. I already feel a bit better. It's reassuring to hear from others in the same boat.
Ahh holly, I am sorry. I do think it is a myth that women are more fertile after a miscarriage. I am sure some people are but it won't be the case for everyone and all it does is to put the pressure on. I know of a number of women who conceived at ease or conceived their kids at ease then had a miscarriage and it took them a good year or more to conceive after a miscarriage - a long time compared to their quick conceptions. It would seem that their bodies took some time to recover from their miscarriage. You are still well within the realms of taking a 'normal' amount of time and I know it is easy to compare yourself to others plus the added horribleness of dealing with friends pregnancies but I am sure it will happen for you very soon .
Hey. I'm on my fifth cycle of ttc after a D&C and the first of those cycles ended in an early MC. I don't seem to be benefitting much from the increased fertility theory either . It's sickening, isn't it. I think what I find hard is the lack of control: you can do everything 'right' and it still doesn't happen. Have you spoken to your GP? I just wonder if, with you having short cycles, you could be referred for investigation a little early? I mean, you could argue that plenty women only have 12/13 cycles in a year and they get referred after a year of ttc, and you're effectively at the same point... For starters, have you ever had a Day 21 test to check ovulation?
Sorry I can't be much help but I'm wishing you well x
DH and I have been ttc since June 2012. Got lucky in September 2012 after 5 cycles (at the time it felt like we had been trying forever which I now know was nothing!). Devastatingly this pregnancy ended in a missed miscarriage discovered at the 12 week scan. I had an ERPC in December. Everything was fine from a physical point of view and we were advised to wait for one cycle before trying again. This made sense to me from an emotional point of view and to give my body chance to recover.
In January we started again in earnest. We were feeling quite positive and hoping that now we knew what we were doing it would take even less than five cycles. Here I am, 11 cycles in (I have 27 day cycles) and I’m still not pregnant. We have tried ovulation sticks, SMEP, temping, CBFM, not doing any of this and just EOD…nothing. We are both finding this really difficult. The changing seasons really emphasises the passing of time. We passed the EDD in June. I find it very hard to come to terms with the fact that this time last year I was pregnant, yet 12 months on I have no baby and am not even pregnant.
In the time since the miscarriage we have had so many pregnancy announcements from friends and several of those babies have now been born. I am obviously happy for my friends and excited for them but so envious and each time I hear pregnancy news a little bit of my heart breaks.
I am hoping to hear some positive stories about other women who have taken a while to conceive after miscarriage. It seems everyone on these boards benefits from the ‘increased fertility after miscarriage’ and is pregnant again after 3 or 4 cycles. Please share any stories and help me find some positivity again.