So I'm 39. I have two gorgeous girls aged 15 and 13.
And... I think I want another child.
My mid-to-late 20s were spent bringing up babies then since 30 I've built up my career.
Last year I very unexpectedly found out I was pregnant though sadly miscarried a couple of weeks later. The pregnancy was a complete shock but I was so happy about it and completely gutted to lose it.
Thing is, this nagging feeling that I want another child just won't go away.
I keep trying to rationalise that it must be some hormonal natural reaction to being nearly 40 and too old 
I'd always thought how brilliant my 40s are going to be as having children when younger meant I'd be free at that stage of my life - so why on earth do I want to risk my freedom to go "back" 20 years.
And what if I had another child, and then regretted the commitment I'd made... The thought of going back to doing daily school runs for example, urgh...
But it something I think of pretty much most days, some kind of "need".
I'd really appreciate feedback/ideas/perspectives from anyone else who can relate to how I'm feeling.
Thank you 
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Conception
Another child - logic or emotion?
katymc1973 · 17/09/2013 13:28
Thank you for your replies, I appreciate it
Yes, same father.
He's not exactly keen on the idea, much preferring me to "borrow" my niece and nephew to fill that need, than creating chaos in our own lives by bringing a baby into the mix of teenagers and busy working lives.
JYP your "MAD" comment has made me laugh as I wonder how much of the reality I've forgotten (memory is very selective when it needs to be).
I mean, I have it all - no longer need babysitters, children sleep in later than we do, they can cook, bring tea in the morning....
But, but, but...
I just don't want to get for it to be too late and think "I wish...."
"no longer need babysitters, children sleep in later than we do, they can cook, bring tea in the morning..."
"But, but, but... "
But it might actually be really cool, right? :)
If you had just ONE more, with all your experience and with built in babysitters teenagers to help out, it could be awesome.
I am NOT trying to talk you into it, but despite how knackered I am, it is still fun having little ones.
Plus, if it was just ONE - that's a while different ballgame. One baby you can bring most places, one toddler can sleep in your room when you go on exciting holidays.
It wouldn't have to tie you down all that much.
That's the other nice thing about having your (first) children young - you can have some big space out family if you fancy it. The option's yours.*
[*usual caveats apply]
Just think it through very carefully, I had a child when I was 43 and to be honest, although there are lots of brilliant bits, sometimes it is hard in your late mid 50s supporting a teenager - many of my friends are at are very different stage in life and I am always the one having to rush back for school pick up/spend weekends driving to rugby matches etc etc etc. And I haven't even got to the really difficult teenage years yet 
.
Ha yes, accidents do but I couldn't intentionally trick him....
Contraception is an interesting subject though as we don't exactly, just the good old withdrawal method....
Thank you Ragwort. This is so very true and I find this quite confusing. My 40s/50s child free (ish) could be the most amazing, exciting, unknown time... why jeapordise that opportunity. Having teens is like having toddlers again, the depth and breadth of emotion they put you through in the space of an hour - utter despair, anger, frustration, hurt - then such love, humour and utter pride that you've helped to create such amazing people
Despite the traumas I've always loved being a mum, and really think I could, would, do it all again.
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