Advise Needed

(50 Posts)
Ninka Wed 23-Jan-13 18:31:38

Hello
I have just found out ( yesterday ) that i am pregnant.

I am generally happy however, i need some advise regarding when i was likley to have consived.

Here are the facts ( please dont judge me i know i should have been more careful)

I had my last period around November 17th 2012, I know this as it was my friends wedding. ( Im irregular usually 40+ than the usual 28 day as my previous perious was around the begining of september 2012)

I had intercourse on 10th december with (A) which didnt ejeculate inside me
I had intercourse on 18th december and 25th with (B) who did ejaculate inside me.

I took two negative testes on 20th dec and 28th dec.

I dont know how far along i am as im waiting on a scan.... im hoping it is (B) baby otherwise im going to be in such a pickle

:I(

juniper904 Wed 23-Jan-13 19:48:35

Have you done a Clear Blue digital pregnancy test? That estimates how far pregnant you are.

Iwish Wed 23-Jan-13 20:27:44

At a guess I would say that B would be poss the daddy as A didn't ejaculate. And also if you were pregnant by A you would most prob have had a positive test by 28th.

As I said its only a guess xx

Soph80 Wed 23-Jan-13 20:47:29

Its not surprising the tests on 20th and 28th would have been negative as it takes at least 10 days for the egg to implant. It could be either 18th or 25th but as you're periods are irregular it would be difficult to know exactly when. Like Juniper says, the clearblue test is prob your best bet before a scan

Ninka Thu 24-Jan-13 11:32:00

Clear blue say 3+ and that doesnt help as both were 3+

Ive been to a midwife and she said im due on 24th august by my last period dates

But i didnt have intercourse other than the dates above

Thanks guys

Ninka Thu 24-Jan-13 11:34:19

Think a scan is my only option now

The issue is (B) wants to be there for us but cant knowin theres a possibility it may not be his. Which i totally understand

Soph80 Thu 24-Jan-13 21:31:54

wouldn't 'a' make you 4+? Are you ok about everything? x

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 08:53:17

Both make me 3+
Did one anyway yesterday came back 3+

:'(

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 11:35:23

If the baby is (B) ill be over the moon
But if its (A) im gonna have to make some serious desisions....one night stand. :-(

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Fri 25-Jan-13 11:54:09

Is it possible for you to pay for an early scan to date your pregnancy (and keep it secret from B). I had a reassurance scan at 8 weeks, it cost £85.

If you can't afford that you may need to explain your situation to your GP and beg for a scan (or pretend you have had some bleeding - very naughty).

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 11:56:07

I have a scan on tuesday at abortion clinic.
and i have appointment at the midwife on friday

are the a and b too close together to be able to tell though?

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Fri 25-Jan-13 12:25:26

If you got pregnant with after sex on 25th Dec you should definitely be able to rule out A being the dad. When I had my early scan the sonographer dated me at 7weeks 2 days (I had it down as 7wks 4). I think the scans have to be taken with a pinch of salt but they really should be able to give you a good idea.

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Fri 25-Jan-13 15:25:24

I'd say the chances are its B's. You will never totally 100% know without a DNA test which can't happen until the baby is born. Don't terminate it just because you are unsure. Give this some serious thought and try to remember if you had any signs of ovulation when you had sex with B i.e. sore ish boobs, EWCM etc.

As I say, from your dates I'd put money on B

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 16:55:09

i had sore boobs last week and i had EWCM just after xmas .... i didnt think anything of it ( thought i was just due on!)

Im so hopeful its (b) as he wants to support us both where as (a) is a waste of space sad

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful Fri 25-Jan-13 16:57:13

If you had ewcm after Xmas it sounds really likely you conceived after dtd on 25th. Really hope the scan gives you a good idea when you conceived.

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 17:10:14

lets hope these scans give me the dates i need, im praying xxx

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Fri 25-Jan-13 17:25:20

When is the scan?

Ninka Fri 25-Jan-13 17:27:15

I have one monday with the abortion clinic ( doctor sorted this for me as the quickest way for me to get a scan )
and i have one on friday with the midwife

ill compare both results and hopefully ( fingers legs and toes crossed) i get the result i want.

I honestly cant see it being (A) for several reasons.... mainly because we wasnt at it for long, and he didnt ejeculate. where as (B) did....

im sure i would have been due on around mid jan....

JustplainoldBuggerlugs Sun 27-Jan-13 16:35:51

Hope everything goes ok tomorrow. I really do think that B is the father though. Have you worked out how many weeks you should be for A and B?

Iwish Sun 27-Jan-13 19:41:30

I think even by scan dates you can't tell who the father is. I know when I ovulated due to temping and using opks when pg with my DS and I would have been due 10th October but the scan dated me as 3rd October which means that I was pregnant a week before I ovulated.
I think the father will be (b)

How did you get on Hun? Xx

digerd Sun 27-Jan-13 20:15:36

If you are sure A did not ejaculate inside you, why do you think he may the dad?

Ninka Mon 28-Jan-13 08:53:09

i thought pre ejaculation contained sperm?
correct me if im wrong?
i didnt think it mattered

digerd Mon 28-Jan-13 13:31:17

If that happens it is only a wee bit -but then a wee bit sometimes is all it takes.
As you have a 40 day cycle, in theory/assumption you ovulate halfway through so day 20 would be reckoned. But that is uncertain too.
In my case I had a 28 day-cycle and got pregnant on the 15th day. The day after halfway. But was a full ejaculation inside.
How did the scan go today and was a date of conception able to be determined?
All the best to you

Fakebook Mon 28-Jan-13 13:39:09

It's too close IMO. Sperm can stay alive inside for up to 5 days so even if A didn't ejaculate, he may have deposited a little bit from the pre-ejaculate and you might have conceived through that. I don't think a scan will help either for that reason.. DNA test will be more appropriate IMO.

digerd Mon 28-Jan-13 13:42:59

Fakebook
OP has an appt at the abortion clinic for the scan today.

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