TTC 10+ months thread 12

(999 Posts)
buzzybee123 Fri 21-Dec-12 13:56:58

A very friendly and supportive thread for those taking way longer than they had ever expected to make a baby.

buzzybee123 Mon 04-Feb-13 11:59:13

ok have set up part 13

buzzybee123 Mon 04-Feb-13 11:50:50

morning ladies

madness it is a big decision and does seem odd that it works one way but not the other, I'm not really sure what we would decide until in that situation

teu glad mini teu has two femurs grin

critter I think for Barry its all about confidence and he never got that from his parents so he is now having to learn about it now, I have to admit that the whole adoption process is scary and he needs to be in the right place for it but I feel ready.

euro my MIL is who she is so I need to accept that but its not easy as she has no insight at all hmm I have only struggled to get to 8 things so not sure LC will be impressed with me, I think you are handling it all amazingly well, I am not sure how I will cope during my IVF 2ww.

mrsd sounds exciting, I don't worry about not giving MIL a grandchild, that is not my 'job' and I am not trying for a baby for her but for me and Barry.

freedom sorry it didn't work this time

I think it might be time for a new thread. . .

freedom2011 Mon 04-Feb-13 11:25:28

mrsden - yes, maybe me for an IVF cycle around spring. we have our first IVF discussion appointment on 4 March and I found out today that IUI Mark IV failed. And that I have a cyst. BUt nothing to worry about apparently. Only 1 IUI left this coming cycle in Feb, then onto IVF. Maybe we will be IVF buddies.

Good and positive thoughts for euro and doll and everyone else.

EuroShagmore Mon 04-Feb-13 10:27:42

Hello!

I thought I posted last night but the internet must have eaten it as it is not there!

Sorry about AF's arrival rabbit. And during Countryfile too. Tsk.

buzz I've been thinking about requesting an endometrial scratch. I've felt since about 3 months in that our problem was implantation - that was partly gut feeling and partly that in those early months I had a bunch of unusual symptoms in the 2ww. I guess if my grade 1 embie doesn't stick, that will add some support to that idea. Maybe a scratch will help.

sar I thought tubes being stuck to bowels was quite common with endo? That's why a lot of endo women have IBS (I have IBS and have long wondered about endo as nothing else has shown up in our tests, which is how I am aware of the link).

Teu hurrah for a good scan and 2 10+ babies in 6 months' time!

My MIL isn't too bad when she is not staying with us but the problem is that Mr Euro and her tend to snipe at one another, which makes things very stressful for me, wanting to be supportive of him, but not upset her! She is not a bad person though. I just wish she had moved on after her split from Mr Euro's dad. She's done the catholic martyr thing. I think a companion would have eased the burden on Mr Euro and his brother (and his dad, who still to some extent supports her financially) enormously. Oh dear. I didn't put very much positive in there, did I? Your LC would be disappointed in me, buzz.

mrsd thanks for asking. I'm feeling a little anxious today. Not worrying about anything in particular but just have a kind of tight feeling in my chest. I don't feel anything resembling "symptoms". On the two previous occasions where I think I have had CPs, I have had symptoms v early - about 2-3 days after ov.

mrsden Mon 04-Feb-13 10:05:42

I agree with critter, february is a terrible month. It's so dark and miserable at the moment, I can't wait for spring to make an appearance. Things always seem better when the sun is shining.

teu that's great news on the two femurs grin does it seem real now?

joy has it sunk in yet? What are the next steps?

Was countryfile full of fertile animals again rabbit? I'm sorry af arrived. We're almost cycle buddies, mine came on Sat. I think the lap has done some good. This af sort of feels different. I've had no pain and no cramping at all. The flow is quite heavy but there are no clots and the blood looks a nice, healthy fresh, bright red colour. Also, I didn't really get any spotting so I'm wondering if the cyst was affecting things. Or maybe I'm imagining it.

I've been looking at my diary and I think I will start ivf the cycle after next. End of March / beginning of April. That gives me two cycles left for a natural BFP. Will anyone else be doing a cycle around then?

euro and doll I hope you're both doing ok.

TeuchterWahine Mon 04-Feb-13 05:07:54

Yah for embies euro and doll. Everything crossed for you here.
rabbit sorry about the a*. That sucks. Hope you are ok.
joy hoping everything is good with you too.
buzzy thanks for asking. There is a person and it has 2 femurs (it amused me that she recorded that) and was wriggling its fingers. 12+6 apparently, which will put me a few days after Artemis. Who I really hope hasn't had any more scares. grin at the MIL list, my no.1 is she lives 11,000+ miles away. Bless her, she's not a bad old bird really.
I am so grateful for the support of all of you in this.

CritterPants Mon 04-Feb-13 03:30:55

Hi everyone

rabbit I am so sorry you're sad my love - when is your appointment? It's got to be a good thing, right? You'll know more than before? Aw, I am sorry it's all so scary and stressful. Paw squeeze.

euro and doll brilliant news about your embies being such good quality - it only takes one! I have everything crossed for you both, you lovely, lovely pair. euro grin at MrEuro being a 'feeder'. Haha!

sar so pleased you had a nice break - I saw a silly story online on the Onion entitled "Man returns from holiday refreshed and renewed in hatred for his job" which made me laugh - lots of short getaways are so the way forward. Fun and distractions, that's what we all need!

buzzy grin at your lifecoach's MIL gratitude list. Barry's dream about Kayla having kittens sounds like a stress dream - poor thing.

mrsd I can definitely relate to the feeling guilty about not providing grandchildren thing.

seaview I love the pound coins in the bra trick. grin Good luck with this 2ww and well done for getting through the IUI like a champ.

lemon really good luck with your work meeting and evaluation today. Power dressing all the way!

gin so sorry you are blue. It's February, a terrible month, and I'm sure that postponing FET after you've got all psyched up for it is extremely stressful and upsetting - you're allowed to be sad! Sad book doesn't sound like it's helping though - you need something cheery and hopeful, you don't need literature bringing you down! Hmm, maybe something silly and funny like PG Wodehouse or Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?

joy Positive energy, love and good wishes going your way from this side of the Atlantic. Wonderful that your beta is still doubling.

art hope you haven't had any more scares - thinking of you.

pout 300 spider babies? Yaaargh, sounds like one of my worst nightmares! shock

viv hope all ok with you? nelly a fun and busy weekend sounds like just what the doctor ordered!

Everything fine here - watching the SuperBowl, no idea what's going on really but the half-time show with Beyonce was fun to watch. Crikey, she really danced her butt off! I spotted a couple of days ago and my temp has been high for two days, but I had boozy nights and lie-ins on Saturday and Sunday so I have no idea if I ovulated - I haven't seen any EWCM and I'm still having the odd twinge. Trying to forget about it and not beadily knicker-watch. Waves to all.

ThatWayMadnessLies Sun 03-Feb-13 22:45:47

Just popping on for a quick wave. Spending the evening filling in complicated ethical dilemma filled forms for the ivf clinic. MrM is doing my head in and all I want to do is go to sleep.......

sar I had lots of stuff stuck. Not sure if tube was stuck to bowel but something definitely was. That's why they couldn't remove all the endo without risking damaging the bowel. The tube that they removed was all matted down with adhesions and scar tissue sad.

Sorry about Af rabbit. How rude of her to disturb countryfile!! You and sar and I all seem to have appointments this week. I hope that yours goes smoothly. I have a new consultant this time which is panicking me a bit. My surgeon was lovely and they are all so rubbish at communicating wi each other that I am sure I will have to explain everything all over again.

Currently finding it hard to get our heads round what to do if one of us dies or becomes mentally incapacitated. It seems like MrM can give me permission to have his baby if something happens to him but not the other way around? I appreciate that he would need to have a woman who would carry and give birth to said child and it's blooming complicated but seems a bit of unfair. That said, I would be very surprised if MrM opted to be a single dad and if he met someone else then he would want to have her child, not ours ifyswim. I would be interested to know other people's views on this.

Okay going to sleep now. Happy monday everyone!

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 22:11:12

nelly thanks, i'm hoping my place do uterine scratching, although I will have assisted hatching as I won't be getting as far as 3 rounds

rabbit what day is your appointment

MuddyWellyNelly Sun 03-Feb-13 22:02:21

Just a quick one to say to Buzzy that no I didn't have assisted hatching. I had it down as a "maybe" but the embryologist said for my first go it was not deemed necessary, and that putting back 2 embryos would be a far better way to increase my chances. They said it was usually recommended by about round 3 hmm.

Sorry about AF Rabbit sad

Had a busy weekend so no chance to properly catch up, general waves and tail feather fluffs to all.

rabbitonthemoon Sun 03-Feb-13 22:00:13

Sar I appear to be the only person on the planet who had a myomectomy for a non existent fibroid OR who had a uterine cyst (I'm not sure they actually exist). I bet they do make things up! Or else millions of women don't post on forums?! Unfortunately dr big is only cons here in fertile Stockport. There's only ever me in the waiting room hmm he's a nice man. But I don't feel entirely trusting of his judgements! But they don't do ivf there so I guess we will part ways soon enough. My brain is ttc mush tonight. I think the apt this week is panicking me. I feel like I can't go back there. This was supposed to happen naturally after the surgery sad

sarlat Sun 03-Feb-13 21:11:55

Ok this is a quick post

Lemon - good luck for tomorrow, things will work out, let us know how you get on.

Buzz - I am sorry for the lack of support from those who should have been there throughout your life. But you and barry sound solid and you are one clued up lady, therefore your day will come.

Gin- sorry that fet is postponed, we will be nearly fet buddies. I have some fet clinic questions for you if thats ok but will chat later in week when have more time.

I am whooping and shaking and acting like a crazy lady to cheer on euro and dolls super embies.

Oh doll - yes my transfer was prolonged due to difficulties navigating my cervix as it is a bendy bully.. One dr told me this can unsettle the womb and potential for implantation. The other dr disagreed. As a result my cervux was widened although they could only crank it to 6 mm just in case this was the main problem.

Rabbit - aw, wish I could give you a real life hug, I know that sad feeing well and its shite. As I have built myself up massivly this month I am sure I will be joining you if I get a bfn. I think sometimes we run out of steam / ideas / hope. A fresh approach could be good. Can you swap condultants ? The upcoming Clomid round may turn things on their head yet. Lots of options for you yet my lovely. I promise.

The weekend break was brill brill brill, coming home to the usual routine and clinic appointment this week was depressing. made a decision to get away more where possible.

I have been googling grade 1 or stage 1 non occlusive disease. Seems iam the only person in the world to ever have this particular diagnosis. confused. Is the stage bit made up???. Also no one else it appears, has ever had a tube stuck to their bowel, surely not. Madness did yiu have a stuck down tube?

Hi to everyone, sorry for not name checking

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 21:01:56

oh rabbit sorry you feel so sad, big hugs

rabbitonthemoon Sun 03-Feb-13 19:57:38

My period has come DURING countryfile. Just the 6 days of spotting then hmm I feel in a right fucking grump. 23 cycles of failed conception. And sad. I feel really quite sad.

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 17:01:36

I am Number 1 woman in my husbands life we are each others no:1 priority, I don't see why I have to justify to her why I need time to grieve the loss of my baby, its none of her business and its not for her to comment on it again and again, it was also none of her business to discuss my miscarriages with her friends either, my former MIL was fantastic and we still have contact which is lovely as I don't have contact with my own parents

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 16:53:35

mrsd my MIL is nice and she does mean well but she just lives in her own low self esteem bubble, which is what I struggle with, she just lives in her head and not in reality which is difficult for me to cope with, I find it frustrating that she does not listen and remember conversations especially important ones like IVF, we have told her now 5 times that we are not eligible to IVF on the NHS where we live, she keeps going on about it as there was a article in the news bout the NHS extending the age for it.
I also find it a bit annoying that she promised to help us financially with IVF but is helping BIL buy another property first and she (hopes to have some money to help us in May), he has a flat already and a stable well paying job, Barry doesn't hmm it is her money to do what she likes with it but I just find her choices a little difficult to understand at times but mainly it is the lack of understanding, she has no idea about things and doesn't research things, she just asks stupid annoying questions, she couldn't understand why I had so much time off when I miscarried the 2nd time, I understand that she did not have the greatest upbringing and not the best of marriages but a little support would go along way right now as we are making the biggest decision of our lives

sorry didn't mean for it be a big moan,

mrsden Sun 03-Feb-13 16:44:12

Without mil there'd be no dh. That's worth a lot. I think it must be hard for mils not to be no 1 woman in their little boys lives.

mrsden Sun 03-Feb-13 16:41:25

Gin, I reckon you've just been bloomin unlucky so far. Your dh had the genetic tests didn't he? So, there's no reason to think there is anything fundamentally wrong with his swimmers. And they are capable of fertilisation so they must be of decent quality. And I'm sure there is nothing wrong with you. It's just this is a crappy, mind tortuous situation. You'll get there. I have all the same worries, a big fear that we will be the couple it doesn't work for. I can't be optimistic about anything to do with ttc.

Euro, you've done so well. You have an embryo inside you! You too doll. I know nothing about what the grades mean but it sounds good!

Buzz, do you get on with mil? Mine is generally ok, but I feel like Ive kept a distance from her recently because I feel guilty about not giving her a grandchild, I know that's stupid. But every single time we speak she mentions something about babies, and I want to crumple.

Lemon, wear your lucky pants!

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 16:35:25

grin grin grin yes my no:1 is that I don't see much of her grin but I need to find a way where I can see her and not want to put a plastic bag over her head. I only got to 5 with help from LC.

I do wonder if my DIL will writing this about me in 30 years time hmm

I hope all goes well at the clinic and the meeting, treat yourself to something nice, you deserve it smile

lovesLemonDrizzleCake Sun 03-Feb-13 15:52:59

Rooting for Barry (*euro*'s embie) and the Beirut-8celler!

And grin at listing 10 good things about one's MIL (coming in on number 1, I have not seen her in a monht, 2 the PILs like holidays and will be away lots of May and June, nut sure this is what LC meant!)

Waves from an assignment Sunday. Brrr.

Big day tomorrow (evaluation at the clinic AND a scary meeting at work, I'll just wear nice clothes).

buzzybee123 Sun 03-Feb-13 15:40:54

afternoon ladies

I was going to ask nelly if she had assisted hatching, I got mixed messages about it, one place said yes two said they didn't think it helped and Create suggested having the uterus scratch thing hmm Brno do assisted hatching as standard from what I can work out so I shall give it ago, it can't hurt.

doll I think it should be down to the individual about full bladder thing as every womans uterus is different, mine is tilted but as long as you have an embie on board that is what matters

gin sorry you feel meh, big hugs

Barry said he had a dream last night that Kayla had kittens grin not that we had a baby but she did hmm that is what adoption talk does to a man.

Well we have been and chosen so bathroom bits as we now have to change a bit in there due to a broken sink hmm although good that I get to change some things in the bathroom, pity its not the crap fish tiles.

teu hope you are ok and let us know how you get on with your scan

pout how are the drugs going??

viv hope you are ok too

well I have a few obs to do so best get on with it, my new homework for LC is listing 10 good things about MIL grin hmm grin I have to say it is a big challenge but need to improve things with her as she could be my MIL for a long long time. . . .

EuroShagmore Sun 03-Feb-13 14:39:06

doll I don't think anything matters apart from how they place the catheter into the womb. Before mine I was contorting myself into a variety of odd positions to try to relieve the bladder pain and hopping around in the manner of someone who needs a wee very badly! So the only difference is that you laid down first!

The assisted hatching can only help.

Gin that's a good point re: the blood test. It might suggest some answers as to what is going on with me.

Sorry you are feeling meh. I do actually believe the Create sales pitch about a lower number of better quality eggs being better. There is always such a drop off at every stage when there are loads of eggs and that makes sense. The ovaries are only designed to produce one or occasionally two at a time. So if you had got 100 eggs, you might not have got any more to the freezing stage.

I might have to check out Utopia. It sounds interesting!

rabbitonthemoon Sun 03-Feb-13 12:53:52

Two - what am I, 7?!

rabbitonthemoon Sun 03-Feb-13 12:53:19

Cross post gin - I saw your book on good reads and liked the look of it. I too have had lurgy on and off through jan and plan on being curled up on the sofa after I've done the boring Sunday jobs. I 100% think you will get there. Maybe it was the sperm or just bad luck. But lots of hope left and I will do believing for you while you feel blue. Lurgy doesn't help. Utopia is very good. There have been too scenes now that I've hidden behind a pillow but mostly it's implied. It really is worth a look. But it is creepy!

GinSoaked Sun 03-Feb-13 12:35:08

Sad back?!! Sad book I meant! It was a proper weepy one. Don't read the Garden on Evening Mists if you want cheering up! I'm going to have to read some nice trash now to take my mind of it..

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