Anyone else want to join me in getting ready for ivf in 2013? Good egg buddies wanted!!!

(1000 Posts)
Karbea Mon 17-Dec-12 18:26:17

Hello,

Dh and I have been trying for over 2 years and had one failed ivf (Icsi) attempt at the Argc last spring. We are going to go again in the new year.

I wondered if anyone else was planning to do the same? And whether anyone fancied joining me in 'princessing' (stolen from style & beauty smile ) for ivf?

I'm not sure what this means in terms of what I'll do, really hoping for some help in researching how to get the best eggs ever, and perhaps how to improve dh's little swimmers....

Anyone up for being a good egg buddy?

BeadyEyes Sun 23-Dec-12 14:53:50

So is anyone off the booze over Xmas?

I am keen to get rat-arsed, as usual, but will probably only have half a bottle of wine. I love healthy food and exercise, but alcohol is the hardest thing for me to give up! But when we started TTC we were drinking a bottle of wine plus a beer or two, every night - since then we have cut back a lot. Hope it's worth it...

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid Sun 23-Dec-12 15:01:25

Beady, me too. As in finding booze the hardest thing to give up. I eat pretty healthily anyway and am underweight it anything, but I find it so hard not to drink anything at all. That's not say I drank loads before, but, for example, we do our quiz once a week. It's the only thing we do regularly together with friends, and when everyone is regularly quaffing ale, it's very hard to just snort sip your coke. I don't drink more than 4 cups of tea a day and rarely coffee. Surely a bit of wine isn't going to make much difference - and I do mean "a bit". After three years TTC, I am willing to bet that our problem isn't that we drink too much.

I am starting IVF at Bourn Hall in Cambridge the second week of January. I'm 39 and have a DS, who is 4. We have been TTC for almost 2 years and have been diagnosed with 'unexplained infertility', if that even counts as a diagnosis. I never in my life dreamed I would be in this situation and even now I don't really believe it. It took a while with DS but I put it down to us both working like maniacs during that time and DH being away for work a lot and so not a lot of diligence. Now I wish that we had started TTC as soon as DS turned 1 but I really couldn't face it then because he was a very poor sleeper and I thought the next time would be easier (ha ha).

Like many of you I am finding it very hard to be described as 'old' by doctors when I feel as young as I ever have. It has really affected my confidence in a lot of ways and it really isn't necessary in addition to the infertility. I already know it is hard for me to conceive that's why I haven't done it yet! So why rub it in by referring to my age? I went to one scan and the nurse must have said the (patronising) words 'older mums' at least 6 times in 2 minutes.

Is anyone else starting IVF in Jan? I'm giving up alcohol and caffeine (sigh), winding down both over this week.

BeadyEyes Wed 26-Dec-12 15:18:22

Welcome fairy. I am also giving up alcohol, probably this week! I wasn't planning to give up caffeine completely, but change to green tea rather than coffee as I get closer to the treatment. It's not going to be easy! I know what you mean about being treated as old, I am only 35 but doctors say stuff like "that is to be expected, for your age"... hmm

joycep Wed 26-Dec-12 17:20:04

I don't know whether anyone else has heard of this but apparently quitting refined sugar during stimming is a good idea. Apparently sugar is bad for the growing embies and not only affects acidity but it causes insulin surges and too much insulin effects hormones. I guess this all comes hand in hand with a low GI diet during ivf. Not sure of the science behind this!
fairy - i also never dreamed i would be in this ivf situation. I think i'm in slight shock about it actually. Doctors love to use the age thing and it can come in all guises at different ages...several yrs ago when I was 31 I was being told "oh your amh is low for your age". Thanks, so my ovaries & reserve are old compared to me. It really does affect confidence.

Hi Joycep and Beady - I think doctors are just trying to be 'realistic' but actually it really only affects your confidence and makes you feel terribly pessimistic and unhappy. If you have got to the point of IVF you already know the facts and I don't think many women are actually going to be amazed to hear that their age/hormone levels etc have something to do with it. My GP was reassuring and said that I would most likely have a second baby either naturally or via IVF but she is the only one so far. I don't see what the deal is really, it's not as though if it doesn't work I'm going to go back to her and say 'you shouldn't have been so encouraging!'

And the other thing that annoys me about the age issue is no one was there to tell my DH that he needed to get over his issues about 'settling down' a few years ago or else we would have trouble having children. Nor would any of them turn to him now and say 'so why have you left it so long?'

I've just been reading the Zita West book and she recommends low GI generally and especially during treatment. I suppose it's worth a go at least because then you avoid consoling yourself with sweeties although I agree with you joycep that I doubt there is much actual clinical research behind it.

keepJinglingThoseBells Sun 30-Dec-12 14:59:23

Hi everyone, I've been away, but now back to the real world.

Sharon sorry to hear about your bro. My sister told me she's having her second, again conceived instantly, a couple of weeks ago and I cried for days.

blondebsby so sorry your cycle didn't work.

Af just arrived, so onto the letrozole and iui. aries I was planning three iui but due to this cycles cancellation will only do two, as living abroad, with medical insurance, only till August. So sorry to hear your cycle was also cancelled, and not even for a good reason! That's dreadful. My cancellation coincided with my sister's announcement. Yes, that was a bad weekend...

keepJinglingThoseBells Sun 30-Dec-12 15:07:04

fairy if I am ever lucky enough to get pg I will never use contraception post birth. If I miraculously got knocked up again immediately I would be ecstatic. Bloody doctors. How long did you ttc your first?

Not sure I can cope with all these ivf 'rules'. Argh!!

SE3 Sun 30-Dec-12 21:12:05

Hi

My first time on mumsnet. I had a miscarriage 3 years ago and have been trying to conceive ever since. I am now 43 and recently had a fertility M.O.T including an AMH test at Create. I found out that i had poor blood flow in my uterus ( which may have been the reason for my MC), a big endometriotic cyst over my right ovary and an AMH result of 0.06. Great news all round then. I have been told that I have a 5% chance of conceiving with my own eggs but a higher chance with donor eggs. They recommended that the donor be under 35, if i wanted to find my own donor, or they could provide the eggs. My sister who is 42 has offered her eggs, which i would much prefer - she has 3 kids of her own and is an elite athlete. She has had an AMH test and is awaiting the results. I now need to find the money for IVF and decide whether to abandon any thoughts of using my own eggs in favour of my sisters - depending on the AMH result of course. Anyone had an AMH this low or has any advice re IVF on such a low result?

delilahbelle Sun 30-Dec-12 21:21:41

Hi All
I am currently preparing for donor egg IVF in the New Year. I'm on the pill to synchronise my cycle with my donor's, have had all the blood tests etc and DH has left a frozen sample at my clinic abroad. I do feel a bit of a fraud, as other than one scan to check my lining as I have to do is remember a few pills/patches/pessaries. A bit less stressful than the jabs/blood tests and scans prior to EC.

Aiming for ET sometime in end of Jan/Feb if all goes well. I am quitting alcohol come the 1st and all caffeine, so no tea/chocolate, (thank god I don't like coke or coffee), as well as doing my 30 day shred DVD. Also on the prenatal vitamins. Other than that I will be proceeding pretty much as normal.

SE3 I've got low AMH (1.83 I think) but FSH of over 20 - so no point in even thinking about cycling according to various consultants. I've had 3 IVFs, all with poor response, and a family history of premature menopause, so a fair time to come to terms with using donor eggs. PM if you want to chat more. x

delilahbelle Sun 30-Dec-12 21:23:59

Also SE3 the two major indicators for success with donor eggs are donor age and proven fertility, nothing else has a significant effect. Something to think about before going with your sister rather than a different donor?

SweetieSnowball Sun 30-Dec-12 21:45:45

SE3 I did an IVF short cycle in September, my AMH is 0.0 but my FSH is 9, so these things are never straight forward. I was on the max stims and produced a single egg/embryo but it sadly resulted in BFN.

delilah I am also preparing for IVF early next year with donated eggs. I am currently on a mock cycle to make sure my womb lining reacts well to the hormone drugs. I have to go for a scan next week to take measurements etc. Then I have to start down reg jabs to sync cycles with the donor. Not sure of the exact dates as yet but would think EC/ET will be Feb.

delilahbelle Sun 30-Dec-12 22:34:30

sweetie it's nice to meet someone else in the same boat. I don't know anyone IRL who has/is having IVF, let alone with donated eggs..

I am not having a mock cycle, although I did have a mock transfer at my last appointment. I'm going with a clinic abroad though so it's a bit more hands off. Their stats look good though <crosses fingers frantically> I don't have to down regulate either - I am on the pill, and then stop the pill and move onto estrogen patches when my donor starts stimms.

SweetieSnowball Sun 30-Dec-12 23:10:58

Delilah I have a friend in RL who has DD from DE, which may be why it wasn't such a major decision for us. Also bizarrely a colleague is also going through ivf with de at the same clinic as us too. We didn't even look into clinics abroad before but I believe they have excellent reputations. Sounds like it is very similar treatment if slightly different timings.

Sharonbenn Mon 31-Dec-12 08:41:40

Hello everyone
I hope you all had a good Christmas. Just wanted to wish everyone a happy and healthy new year. I look forward to getting to know everyone and I hope that 2013 brings all that we wish for. Best wishes
Sharon x

Northey Mon 31-Dec-12 16:16:36

Feeling quite unhealthy at the moment, after a Christmas of food and drink and laziness, but New Year is sort of a good time to start afresh anyway, so from tomorrow the coffee, booze, chocs etc all stop, and the veg and water all return. My consent consultation is in 10 days, and, assuming all goes to plan, I'll start injecting in February. Gulp. But at least that gives me a good month to get my body back on the path to healthiness.

Isabeller Mon 31-Dec-12 17:56:58

Hi all,

I am v crone-like in ancientness and will be having first attempt with DE in January, so good to hear of others on this road. I feel inspired by everyone's heathy resolutions and hope that helps me stick to my own.

Good luck to everyone in 2013 and have a great and hopeful New Year Celebration wherever you are x

Managed to get through NYE without indulging too much in booze - now time to cut it out entirely (aagh!). Luckily it's a beautiful day and the sunshine is very inspiring.

keepjinglingthosebells - it took about 18 months to conceive our DS but quite a few of those months were not even in the running because of our lifestyles at the time (I was doing a very tough full time degree course and DH was commuting every day to a job he despised). The month I got pregnant I did not even think it was possible because I had just finished my final exams and was totally fried, we moved house and only had sex once, on about day 17/18 which I assumed was too late. Now I have been doing BBT I know that stress always delays my ovulation so actually it makes sense but at the time I was astounded when on day 32 I suddenly realised that AF had mysteriously not shown up (normally day 27 or 28).

We then weren't in any hurry to conceive no 2 because a lot of my friends took a long time with no 1 and given our circumstances I assumed that was why it took so long. Also we really could not afford to have 2 children in full time nursery or me going part time so it wasn't really feasible to start TTC until DS was 3. He also was a v poor sleeper and I had health complications during pregnancy and delivery that did not make me keen to get pregnant again right away. I also felt that I wanted DS to have time to be the only child, a lot of the people I know have children very close together and they end up having little energy for either (not that I blame them!)

Now of course I often think - why didn't we start again sooner? so I totally understand why someone who had trouble TTC no 1 would not plan any deliberate gap between no 1 and no 2. But probably all of us who are having trouble conceiving think if I could do it again, I would have started when I was X years younger. A counsellor told me that you make these decisions on the best information at the time and if everything were 'normal' I would have got pregnant again in a reasonable length of time after starting TTC so it was not a bad decision to leave it a while. I can intellectually understand this but sometimes I do feel tremendously guilty for having delayed it.

And I forgot to say Happy New Year everyone and good luck in 2013.

delilahbelle Tue 01-Jan-13 19:15:55

Hi isabeller nice that there's another DE person around. Are you using a clinic in this country or abroad?

So far today I've done my shred DVD, made and eaten veg soup for lunch and a healthy fish pie for dinner, and been for a long walk with DH. All very good. Sadly I have also eaten a load of chocolate and am enjoying a coca-cola - the last of the Xmas treats.

delilahbelle Tue 01-Jan-13 19:16:22

On and Happy New Year one and all!

Isabeller Wed 02-Jan-13 00:26:41

Hi delilah I am going to a uk clinic, also doing semi healthy eating and exercising not very hardcore at all in fact blush quite undisciplined. Ho ho hum.

keepJinglingThoseBells Wed 02-Jan-13 02:02:31

fairy I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to sound critical. Of course, you made the decision based on what you knew at the time, and as you say, for most people they could decide and plan to some extent when it'd happen again. You know you can conceive, and carry a baby successfully, so once you have ivf to help on that first bit you'll be all good. :-)

I managed some exercise yesterday, get me!

keepjinglingthosebells- don't worry I didn't take your question as criticism at all! If I sound defensive its because I am always trying to justify my choices to myself! As you say I have done it before so fingers crossed I should do it again although it would have been nice to happen so effortlessly again.

keepitgoing Wed 02-Jan-13 10:25:08

18 months doesn't exactly sound effortless :-)
But I know what you mean. The last three people I know who've got pregnant literally have told me it was a one night or one month thing. How many shags will it take me? Ah yes, I'm outsourcing now...

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