The Clomid Crew - Part 2

(1000 Posts)
goldengirl71 Tue 20-Nov-12 14:33:17

"Come on, ovaries! Let's get this party started, yeah?!"

npg1 Tue 11-Dec-12 14:03:24

Meluv, glad the op went well for you. Golden hellooo! X

Rosiechoice Tue 11-Dec-12 21:34:07

npg congrats! That's fantastic news! How many scans have you had this cycle? I asked for another 1 but they wouldn't allow it sad it's nice to know not everyone ovulated on cd14, I think your bd was pretty well timed by the sounds of it x

Meluv Wed 12-Dec-12 07:16:50

golden these are for you thanks along with a big massive hug from me am gutted for you lovely I was so hopeful last month deep down but was trying my hardest to put a front in saying I was not hopeful but I was its gut renching luv I can honestly say I hate this whole journey it's false fake an I feel like a performing circus act now I only carry on with this hell ride hoping for an amazing life changing result a lil bundle of joy that is all I keep thinking of my relationship has become so strained its become all about cd times egg white clomid scans blood tests grrrr it's getting me so down now .... Well girls I do hope we have some more good news on our thread real soon good luck to us all an big hugs too xxxx ps *golden please take care lovely XXX

npg1 Wed 12-Dec-12 15:53:34

Hi. I had about 8 scans in total I reckon. Im just hoping this month will be it for us. I was wondering if the reason I havent fallen pregnant recebtly is because I ovulate late and we normally give uo after about cd 20.

Everything so far has been positive for me so fingers crossed. X

doobeedee Wed 12-Dec-12 17:26:22

Well looks like I'm joining you properly now. Had appointment this afternoon and been prescribed Clomid for 6 months. Also had some more blood tests and getting a HSG. He also took my thyroid and short luteal phase concerns seriously which were the things I was most worried about him thinking was not a problem.

Rosiechoice Fri 14-Dec-12 18:45:52

Wow it's quiet on here these days! I hope you're all ok?

npg1 what cd do you think you ovulated on? I'm on cd19 and don't think I've ovulated on 100mg sad even though last month I thought I had on 50mg confused I'm hoping that I'm just going to be late but I doubt it! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you x

doobeedee welcome to the craziness that is clomid! How long is your luteal phase if you don't mind me asking? I think mines too short! It all sounds really positive from your appointment.

TGI Friday!
X

npg1 Fri 14-Dec-12 19:16:47

Thanks rosie. I am on CD29 today. Slight sore boobs but could be in my mind lol! So the luteal phase should be 14 days after ovulation?

What I dont understand is when I had the mcI found out on CD23 as did an early test which I shouldnt have done.

doobeedee Fri 14-Dec-12 19:24:07

Hi Rosie,

My luteal phase is ridiculously short at 7-9 days. He didn't believe me at first as he said it was so rare but he had written a thesis on it 20 years ago. When I told him I knew as I'd read it he looked at my charts and started to take me seriously! I said that maybe he could update his thesis now using me as an example!!

Rosiechoice Sat 15-Dec-12 08:24:09

npg1 hopefully your sore boobs are 1 of many signs to come! It is difficult to stay calm about it all though, we can all relate to that! Yeah 14 days seems to be the optimum, but I've read that 12 is ok (a little on the short side) and can be up to 16 days.
I don't claim to be an expert on all this ttc, I'm just a little obsessed and google is an amazing tool!
Maybe you ovulated earlier in your cycle that month so cd23 could have been later, who knows! It must have been awful for you though.

doobeedee that is short! I'm so glad he's taking you seriously though, hopefully with his past knowledge he'll get you 'back on track'. I read that vitamin b6 is good to help lengthen luteal phase and progesterone creams but from what I gather they're a bit controversial and can increase the risk of mc.

I've been temping this month, I haven't thought I've ovulated because I didn't have a significant dip but for the past 3 days my temperature has risen so good old fertility friend says I ovulated on Tuesday, I'm absolutely kicking myself because we missed bd on Monday and then on Tuesday (tmi I know) when we'd 'finished' and dh moved a lot (I think all) of his semen came out sad so I'm not hopeful for this month at all. Of course I have read up about it and it seems that some people say that sperm swim pretty fast but others say don't move for 1/2 - 1hour (which I normally do) I hope I haven't wasted this month!

doobeedee Sat 15-Dec-12 09:21:46

Yep. I said it was ridiculous! I've tried everything I can try myself and nothing has made any difference although I might be on to something with vitamin D supplementation. I've read studies about it and my LP did actually make 10 day in July and August when I'd spent a lot of time in the sun. Also, I could have something rare called Lutinised Unruptured Follicle Syndrome. This is where you get all the signs of OV such as pos OPKs and a BBT rise but the egg never left the follicle. Not many people know about it but can be a cause of unexplained infertility. Luckily, my specialist's thesis covered this as well!

Hopefully2012 Sat 15-Dec-12 10:03:37

Hi Ladies

Golden - sorry to here bfn hun. good luck this month & hopefully you won't need app in Jan.

Meluv - Glad op went great hun.

npg - Good luck got fingers crossed hun.

Rosie - I'm sure one sperm reached your egg & thats all you need is one. Don't worry about it hun. fingers crossed.

Well where do i start i got bfn & very painful cramps & back pain today. I am so devastated i thought i was sadly i am heartbroken & this is the end of my clomid journey now (for 6mths). I have been trying ttc for over 5years & got one bfp which ended in mc 2 years ago, 3 op & loads of treatments & nothing i think i have got to except that i'm not going to get the baby i want so much. I have to have more treatment for endo which only helps very short term & start saving for IUI. Endo beat me we done everything right eat healthy, both took ttc vitamins, workout, no drinking alcohol or smoking & regular sex weekly even more when ovulating, great body but not so great to get pg.
I can't stop the tears from falling. all i can do is drink & drink coz i don't want to be in all this mental & physical pain. Not even drink helps. Xmas is going to be crap got to see loads of babies to add salt to my wounds & pretend to be happy (great). Dh is working away so i can't even get a hug. I thought writing this would help but it don't. I will not be in the clomid crew anymore (finished 6 cycles clomid ). Its been so painfully hard & i'm finding hard as its not going to happen for us & its my fault. I lost the battle ttc. I know should dust myself off & pick myself up but sorry don't have any strength to do that now. what can i say i'm devastated & all alone to try deal with all this pain. All i wanted is a baby never imaged it would be so long, hard & painful journey.

Good luck all ladies & hope you all get bfp soon.

Have a merry xmas & great new year x x

npg1 Sat 15-Dec-12 10:53:07

Hopefully, im so sorry for you. thanks What treatment do you have to have hun? I cant begin to understand how you feel. Big hugs to you x

LittleFilly Sat 15-Dec-12 14:22:19

Hopefully - really really sorry it didn't work out for you. You must be so devastated. Try to stay hopeful though, as there are still other avenues to explore. I'm a big believer in one door closing and another opening in life, so you never know what is in store for you. Have you tried acupuncture yet? I've heard great things about it, and it might just help you deal with the emotional and stressful side of things.

Npg - v glad indeed to hear that you ovulated! Exciting news indeed.

Doobee - it's good to hear that you're getting some proper help, and that they're taking your TSH level seriously. Welcome to the Chlomid crew officially!

My AF arrived Tuesday :-(, which marked the end of Chlomid cycle 2.. Strangely felt ok about things, which is unusual because normally the arrival of AF means I feel very gloomy and tearful. One thing that may have helped was that I told my mum what was going on earlier this week. She was very supportive and it felt like a huge relief to have told someone.

Now taking a month off the Chlomid and the CBFM, as don't want to ruin Christmas by being all hormonal and tearful. The whole family is coming to stay and don't want to be create extra undue stress. Then back on CBFM and Chlomid in Jan. That will make month 3. If that doesn't work, we're going to move on to IUI.

Anyway, my message to you all is to try to enjoy Christmas if that's possible. I'm find doing some blessing counting always helps me keep things together. Big hugs to you all.

LF xxx

npg1 Sun 16-Dec-12 22:59:34

Evening ladies, well I am going out of my mind. 9DPO today. Felt a bit funny yesterday and spent most of the day laying on sofa. Today been out all day, had couple glasses wine. Got home and went to loo and have slght spotting. I hope to god this isnt AF I really do. CD31 for me and normally they are anything from 35- 40. God tummy pains too

Hopefully2012 Tue 18-Dec-12 15:27:50

Hi Ladies

npg - Thank you for lovely message hun. I hope you have stopped spotting & tummy pain. I hope af does not arrive. I have got have injections in my tummy for 5months which stop my hormones which will stop endo growing while on it then it comes back after sadly so really don't see the point. My Consultant offered me a 4th op but that comes with loads of risk & could do more damage then good as i have endo all over ovaries, tubes & pelvic plus i have loads of scar tissue so i said No & he backed my choice as its high risk. he don't know what else to do with me for ttc as he thinks i will fall pg soon (what a load of crap) he thinks its my endo stopping me getting pg. Hugs x

Liittlefilly - Thank you for lovely message hun. Must be a weight off your shoulders telling your mum (i wish i could tell my mum) Very good idea giving clomid a months break for xmas so you can enjoy yourself i would of done the same this month as well.

I did start to pull myself together then got a bomb shell from my sister who told me she pg with 3rd baby by accident again & she told me @ party while drinking & smoking (she might as well of stab me in the heart it would of been less painful). Everywhere i go i see pg ladies & newborns its driving me f-ing crazy, i'm trying my best to hold myself together but i feel like i'm loosing that battle, i'm a bit better if i'm busy which i am. I can not escape from pg & newborns its haunting & killing me so i'm not going to pick up my heart anymore (done it to many times) i'm going put it in a box & put it in a safe place. I good thing i don't miss clomid lol. Well got to go now got loads of things to do.

Take care ladies & hope you all get bfp xx

goldengirl71 Tue 18-Dec-12 17:36:50

Hopefully, can you afford IVF? Would you look into adoption? There are many ways to make or receive a child to love. Please don't give up hope. Women all over the world are having babies every second and millions of them have suffered far worse journeys than yours. Keep some perspective. Keep adding joyful moments to your life which distract you. Nobody blames you for resenting your seemingly ultra-fertile sister (I would've disowned her by now sad). Unfortunately, it is not a woman's 'right' to have a baby. It's a miracle anyone gets pregnant with all the bloody science behind what needs to happen for that sperm to fertilise that egg. I've been popping two eggs out each cycle on Clomid and no pregnancy here. Thank goodness I've just been offered a voluntary job at the drug service in Manchester I was telling you all about. I start in January and I intend to throw my heart and soul into it. I know I will be meeting serious addicts and their families and, having been an alcoholic myself, I know the pain and degradation of their lives. They will be suffering far more than I am on this crazy train of TTC and I hope to find a little perspective on what life really is all about. It's not all gurgling babies and rockabye baby-land.

My point is, we all need to see the good things in our lives and try to be proud of who we are - regardless of whether we have children or not. Instead of hoping for BFPs for us all I am going to hope that each and every one of us finds some fucking peace over Christmas and a renewed joy about what we've got already.

Kerry xxx

goldengirl71 Tue 18-Dec-12 17:40:10

[waves at Rosie and Meluv] thanks thanks

Rosiechoice Tue 18-Dec-12 21:32:32

Evening,

hopefully my heart goes out to you, I've been rushing around getting ready for Christmas so haven't had chance to write anything but I've been thinking of you and hoping you're managing to get through all of this. golden is right there are many people out there who are a lot worse off than us but I know that at the moment there's nothing anyone can say or do that will make you feel better. You've got to deal with it in your own way, I tend to think anything that helps is acceptable. As for your sister I cannot even imagine how difficult that is to accept, I would really struggle, you're more than entitled to be upset. I think it's natural to feel as though there are babies and pregancy everywhere when you're ttc and especially when it's not 'happening'. Keep busy and as positive as you can (I know how difficult that is though). I think talking to your mum is a really good thing, I found that telling people (only a select few) helped a lot, they'll never totally understand but I think it helps to just talk sometimes.

Take care and I hope you manage to have a good Christmas.

golden that is fantastic about the voluntary job, you'll be brilliant at it, I think it'll be a great thing for you to focus on! New year, new job, new hope! I had a pretty rubbish couple of weeks but I've stepped back and looked at what I've got and I know that I have a lot and should be thankful for it instead of feeling so hard done by, I've been told that if I keep thinking I won't get pregnant it won't happen so positive thoughts all the way (until the next dose of clomid no doubt!) smile nice to hear from you!

flowers to all

eller1984 Tue 18-Dec-12 22:32:12

Hi,
Can I join in your group please girls. Just about to start first month of Clomid.
Look forward to getting to know you all.
xx

chunops Tue 18-Dec-12 22:48:10

Don't go down the route of herbs,if it was that simple,no one would consider clomid,speak to your GP first for her/his advice.Good luck Charlotte.

goldengirl71 Tue 18-Dec-12 23:10:27

I hope I didn't sound preachy in my last post. I think what I'm trying to say is I am beginning to realise that this utter desolation and panic some of us are feeling simply has to stop if we are going to survive this journey. I actually woke up the other night in a cold sweat, panicking at the thought of being childless for the rest of my life. It is a very real possibility for me, at 41, and yet I need to figure out a way of dealing with that sense of 'what am I if I am never going to be a mother'? 'What is the point of my life if I don't have children'? Well...there has to be a point, or else every woman in the world would have to bear children - and they don't. There are plenty of women just like me who lead happy lives without this aching torment.

Sorry to sound so defeatist, I'm not - I'm just trying to explain my personal feelings around that crushing panic and doom we feel when more and more months slip by without a BFP. It's a bloody shitty journey and I for one am not going to spend another year clawing my eyes out in desperation and pissing on sticks. Something's got to give...and I don't want it to be my sanity sad

Welcome, newbies! thanks

goldengirl71 Tue 18-Dec-12 23:11:24

Chunops, wise words. Herbs are bullshit - and that's a fact.

mumalah Wed 19-Dec-12 07:16:43

Hello everyone ! hopefully Im so sorry to hear what your going through. I cant begin to understand how you must be feeling, its so unfair.
npg1 Whats going on, any updates ?
golden Congratulations on your new post, you will be great !

Well Af finally arrived last night , after a cycle of 47 days ! Whats going on ? Before I asked for help from my doctors, my cycle was 28 days every month! Since then everything's gone haywire! Should of been able to tell af was on way as I was teary yesterday morning, then snapped dh head off as soon as he came home yesterday ( we still not speaking !)
Now, do I start 3rd cycle of clomid, or like you Lf take a month off ? Does anyone know if breaks are advisable or not to break the chain of medication ? I rang hospital on Monday as I hadn't started after course of northisterone, and they said to wait till next Monday, and if nothing by then get another prescription.
I really thought Id started the menopause, maybe worrying about that delayed af .
Have a good day everyone!

Annalou84 Wed 19-Dec-12 14:25:59

mymalah I've got straight on with my 3rd cycle I didn't want to take breaks. I'm cd 12 hoping this cycle will work for me!! I have my appt booked for the 4th of jan to get my referral if we are unsuccessful.

Hope you lovely ladies are all ok x

goldengirl71 Wed 19-Dec-12 16:44:27

Hiya, Annalou! I'm on my 3rd Clomid cycle, too! And I'm at DC13! We could be screw buddies! (How is the BD-ing going anyway?) wink

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