secondary infertility meet-up, north london?

[northlondonmom]

Hello all! This is my first post on mumsnet, so apologies in advance if I haven't got it quite right. I am looking for anyone who wants to meet up in person for an informal secondary infertility support group. I am in Finsbury Park, north London, but could also go into town to meet in a central location with anyone from another part of London.
We have a three and a half year old daughter and have been trying to conceive a second child for nearly two years, including three unsuccessful IVF cycles. It would be really great to connect with others in the same situation, friends have been so supportive but secondary infertility seems to be such a unique situation, I'd love to talk to others going through the same thing.

[Italiangreyhound]

Hi Northlondonmum I'm afraid I'm not in London so can't meet up but I wanted to say hi. I can certainly sympathise about secondary infertility.
I have one dd, aged 6, conceived through IUI and have been ttc again since she was 9 months old. I guess in some ways I may not really 'qualify' as secondary infertility as we did have help to have number one! But IUI was really quite straight forward and I really felt that we would have another the same way.

I had a very early miscarriage 5 years ago (unassisted conception). Since then have had many failed IUI attempts, abandoned IVF and one go with donor eggs. We were told early on that donor eggs would be our best bet and we decided just under a year ago to go for it one last time. This is our final attempt.

Do you know why you have had problems conceiving? Have you looked into immunology issues?

Anyway, hope you will get some support where you are.

[northlondonmom]

Hi Italiangreyhoud. Thanks so much for the support. Sorry to hear about your troubles the second time around, I'm sure it must be really hard to have been going through this for so long. We found out last year that I have poor ovarian reserve, so our odds are quite low even with IVF but we may give it one more go. I have not quite decided how I feel about donor eggs. I found a book that has been very helpful, about the emotional aspects of secondary infertility, it seemed to describe so much of what I have been feeling, all the unexpected layers of emotion that are involved in being unable to conceive a second time. It's called "Wanting Another Child," by Harriet Simons, I recommend it highly. It's not practical advice or anything like that, just descriptions of the emotional side of things from women who have experienced secondary infertility. Good luck to you!

[Italiangreyhound]

Thanks Northlondonmom if you do go for any treatment come and find us all www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1041005-Assisted-Conception-and-the-bits-in-between-Volume-6

here

All the best,

[HalleLouja]

There is also a difficulties TTC no 2 thread on here that is really lovely and supportive. There are people who are having medical help and some people starting the journey.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1040439-Having-difficulties-ttc-2

My own story is that I was TTC no 2 for 16 months before falling pregnant, Am now 29 weeks and looking back it was worth all the heart ache - some how all the pain has melted away. PS I have no magic answer it was just one of those things....

PPS That sounds really soppy but you catch my drift.

[Italiangreyhound]

Yes HallLouja I know what you mean.

Congratulations and all the best.

[HalleLouja]

Thanks Italian I used to be loujalou and sometimes posted on AC board when I started AC appointments. I hope all is well and you get your dream soon. xxx

[Italiangreyhound]

Thanks HalleLouja I remember you. All the best.

[northlondonmom]

Thanks HalleLouja, I'm so glad it has worked out for you. Congratulations and good luck. I will check out that thread.