My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Conception

Desperate for a baby. Is anyone elses DH feeling the pressure? What should we do?

8 replies

cloudwine · 27/07/2010 11:46

Hi ladies
Hi ladies

We have found out that I'm no longer ovulating and have taken Clomid for the last 3 months. We've been advised by my GP to have sex every other day from day 10-21 to ensure we hit the right time- I'm pretty sure I ovulate around day 17-18. Recently DH has found it difficult to orgasm (probably as we're both exhausted!) which is leading to frustration and more pressure than we're already under (we've been told we can only have 6 months of Clomid)

Has anyone else found themselves tiring of sex by ovulation day? Can we have sex less often or is this reducing our chances further? I'm worried that by not doing it enough we may miss our chance

Please be gentle, I'm feeling pretty fragile at the mo!

OP posts:
Report
tigersmummy · 27/07/2010 13:26

Not had any experience of Clomid but I would say that having less sex would mean you have less chance of becoming pregnant. Plus if you don't conceive you'll kick yourself for not doing it often enough.

My DH found sex a chore when we were TTC DS so this time round we're determined to make it more fun - maybe give him a massage, take a shower/bath together and recapture why you feel in love in the first place will have relieve the stress and give you more energy for the bedroom.

Sounds like the pressure isn't going to disappear but hopefully you can both find ways of relieving it a little.

Good luck!

Report
cloudwine · 27/07/2010 13:44

Thanks tigersmummy
Your suggestions make total sense and we do try to keep it fun by doing those things. It's not having the choice about when we have sex and feeling like we have to to make a baby that's adding to the pressure. Whenever we take a night off I keep thinking 'what if that was my most fertile time'.
Anyone else feeling like this? DH says the more often we do it, the longer it takes, if he is able to (ahem) finish at all.

OP posts:
Report
delilahbelle · 27/07/2010 13:58

On a slightly more Friday night tone... finger up the bum can help some men finish...

Or there's the v unromantic turkey baster method... there's a thread on here somewhere.

Report
nannyl · 27/07/2010 17:05

how about getting a clear blue fertility monitor so you know when you need to start trying more exactly?

Report
AttilaTheMeerkat · 27/07/2010 17:32

I would be kind to yourselves and only make love when you both feel like it and not when you think its ovulation time (which is nigh on impossible to self determine anyway). Ovulation is not an exact science and a woman can ovulate earlier, later or not at all in any given cycle. You need to take the pressure off you otherwise you will be driven half mad by it all. I think the advice your GP has actually given you is duff to be honest - sex two or three times a week throughout the cycle is fine.

Re the clomid are you being monitored whilst on this drug treatment, if not you should be!. Otherwise you have no way of knowing whether its working or not.

Refrain too from using any type of monitor whilst on clomid as it can give false readings.

Report
cloudwine · 27/07/2010 18:31

at delilahbelle- I said desperate but not that desperate!

Thanks nanny1. I know they're brilliant for some girls on here but apparently not great in my case as they don't account for any changes in hormones caused by Clomid.

Attila, I totally see where you're coming from making love when we want, but if I'm honest this ttc malarkey has gone on for that long, I very rarely feel like it

Is it really essential to start at day 10? I really am pretty sure there are all the signs of ovulation on day 13 at the earliest. Has anyone else been given the same or different advise by a fertility expert?

OP posts:
Report
AttilaTheMeerkat · 27/07/2010 20:05

cloudwine

How long have you been ttc?. Any consultant/fertility unit involvement to date?.

Not essential to start at day 10 at all; I was advised to have sex throughout the cycle.

Report
nappyaddict · 23/08/2010 01:04

I would say if sex less often means he is more likely to finish then surely that means you have more chance of becoming pregnant than doing it really often but him never finishing?

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.