Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help if your child is unwell. If you have any serious medical concerns, we would urge you to consult your GP.

Please hold my hand - cancer.

(987 Posts)
Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 10:31:11

Currently in hospital since last night with DS who is 3. Scans show masses on his brain. Drs believe them to be tumours, likely to have come from his abdomen.

Waiting for more scans/tests etc. staff are being overly nice to us which is worrying me more (though they did refer us to social services last night as they thought DH or I had fractured DS' skull.

Feel incredibly sick. He is 3 years old. Please hold my hand.

I am so sorry you are going through this.No words but consider your hand held x

FunnysInLaJardin Tue 02-Oct-12 10:33:00

you poor poor thing. Consider your hand held. I have no advice, but didn't want to not post.

M44 Tue 02-Oct-12 10:34:52

Thinking of you....lots of virtual hand holding.

trazzletoes I am so sorry.

Thinking of you and your DS.

piratecat Tue 02-Oct-12 10:36:03

Trazzletoes, i will hold your hand. xx

CatPower Tue 02-Oct-12 10:36:14

God Trazzle, I just saw this in Active convos and couldn't read and run.

Keeping my fingers crossed for your DS, and holding your hand too. xxx

EdMcDunnough Tue 02-Oct-12 10:37:59

Have you eaten at all - try something easy like a yogurt drink, it might make you feel a bit less nauseous.

It's the shock and I bet you are very tired too.

Thinking of you have any other children to sort out, have you got any help?

BiscuitsandBaileys Tue 02-Oct-12 10:38:13

Another hand holder here.
Thinking of you all x

16muddypaws Tue 02-Oct-12 10:38:59

Life can be so cruel - this puts all our other worries into perspective - stay strong for your baby -hand held - I've got a feeling you wont't have enough hands for all the support and messages you are going to recieve - keep talking to people don't shut yourself away, it will really help.

TakingTheStairs Tue 02-Oct-12 10:39:01

Holding you hand tightly.

Quenelle Tue 02-Oct-12 10:39:33

I'm holding your hand and thinking of you all.

essexmumma Tue 02-Oct-12 10:39:53

You can hold mine too. My thoughts are with you x

TheReturnoftheSmartArse Tue 02-Oct-12 10:39:59

You're all in my thoughts. X

THERhubarb Tue 02-Oct-12 10:40:10

I am so so very sorry. What a heartbreaking time this must be for you and your family. Please do make sure you look after yourself, get something to eat and have someone there whose shoulder you can cry on.

I am sure the hospital will be working around the clock to do what they can for your little boy. I pray that these tumours are non-cancerous and can be removed safely.

Giving you all virtual hugs. My heart literally goes out to you.

TheLaineyWayIsEssex Tue 02-Oct-12 10:41:34

Another pair of hands here to hold.
Thinking of you all xx

ilovesprouts Tue 02-Oct-12 10:44:38

thinking of you all x

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 10:49:06

Thank you all. This really means a lot to me. He is such a brave little soldier.

The Drs are being fab (now that they've ascertained that we HADN'T fractured his skull and so the referral to social services was unnecessary but that's by-the-by). He's off for a scan of his tummy soon to see if there's anything there. I'm fairly certain there will be. He's had stomach aches for months but I was told it was probably food intolerance.

God, I just can't believe this is happening. Desperately hoping that they can cure him.

I have had breakfast, thanks for worrying, they gave me the news after I'd eaten.

Also have DD (8 months). Hospital have been fab so far and am sure we will have rl support soon enough. We're holding off telling people until we have some more concrete information.

RillaBlythe Tue 02-Oct-12 10:51:58

Thinking of you & your DS.

AnAssumedIdentity Tue 02-Oct-12 10:54:17

Didn't want to read and not post. Lots of love and in my prayers.

IWishIWasAFrog Tue 02-Oct-12 10:54:33

I am so sorry. thinking of you, don't really know what else to say, it all sound so hollow sad

bonnieslilsister Tue 02-Oct-12 10:56:38

Hand holding here too and sending you love and hope like you say it is curable. They really can do so much nowadays xx

CalamityKate Tue 02-Oct-12 10:57:15

I'm so sorry. Another hand here xx

EdMcDunnough Tue 02-Oct-12 10:57:18

I'm glad that they are treating you with kindness. I hope it won't be too hard with DD being so little, to bring her along when you need to be there with DS. Let people help, accept offers, iyswim...people want to do something and will feel better if they can help.

I hope there is some good news before long.

CouthyMowWearingOrange Tue 02-Oct-12 10:57:57

Sending you my best wishes. Xxx

TallulahTwinkle Tue 02-Oct-12 10:59:34

Here to hold your hand too. Hope you get information as soon as possible xxx

cat Tue 02-Oct-12 11:00:16

I hope you get ome better news today.

You and your family are in my prayers


BlueGuinefort Tue 02-Oct-12 11:01:37

Thinking of you x

THERhubarb Tue 02-Oct-12 11:03:00

You sound so strong and so brave. I'm sure I would have fallen to pieces by now.
He's only 3, his body is still developing, let's hope that they can offer an alternative explanation or that they can successfully operate and his little body can fight back against it.

The Macmillan website has information on brain tumours in children, it's the most common type of tumour in children so I hope that means that they have developed effective treatment for it. They may not be cancerous at this stage, let's hope not. It also states that children have a better outlook than adults.

You can ring the Macmillan team if you have questions or just want a chat on 0808 808 00 00. They will provide support to you and your family whilst you are going through this.

If there is anything we can do to help please let us know x

MissBetseyTrotwood Tue 02-Oct-12 11:03:28

Thinking of you and your DS.


BarmeeMarmee Tue 02-Oct-12 11:03:36

Trazzletoes you don't know me, but couldn't read and run. Another pair of hands reaching out for you to hold. Thinking of you all and praying the results of the scan are better news than you are anticipating. xx

Gigondas Tue 02-Oct-12 11:04:11

Thinking of you and your ds today. I really hope can do something for your son (I have cancer myself and know that even the worst news can usually be helped in someway ).

When and if you feel like you need it, there is a support thread for parents with cancer link

Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Holding those hands tightly.

Gigondas Tue 02-Oct-12 11:04:46

Meant children with cancer blush.

You poor darlings. Lots of love to you all x

DaPrincessBride Tue 02-Oct-12 11:07:19

I'm so sorry you are going through this, I hope you get get good news very soon. Holding hands x

VintageNancy Tue 02-Oct-12 11:08:02

Hand holding & thinking of you x

DameFanny Tue 02-Oct-12 11:09:23

Oh hell, I'm so sorry.

PiedWagtail Tue 02-Oct-12 11:12:18

Oh, your poor ds, adn poor you. I can hold your hand too - and give you a big virtual hug. Keep us updated. Praying for your ds.

GooseyLoosey Tue 02-Oct-12 11:21:17

Hoping you get better news today.

MrsSalvoMontalbano Tue 02-Oct-12 11:22:06

thinking of you and your ds and dh

blizy Tue 02-Oct-12 11:24:53

I hope you get some good news today. Thinking of you and your little brave soldier.

SummerRain Tue 02-Oct-12 11:26:01

Oh hell. There are no words. I hope it's not as bad as it looks and the doctors can get on with treating him soon.

Strength and love to your family

weegiemum Tue 02-Oct-12 11:26:10

Thinking of your whole family. Puts other things into perspective really. Hope you get some news soon xx

skateboarder Tue 02-Oct-12 11:27:57

thinking of you.

Nishky Tue 02-Oct-12 11:29:16

Will be thinking of you and yours

nickschick Tue 02-Oct-12 11:34:33

im here too ....fingers crossed gor good news today xx

RachelHRD Tue 02-Oct-12 11:41:29

Thinking of you all, stay strong xxxx

Thinking of you and fingers crossed.

ImNotCute Tue 02-Oct-12 11:42:00

Thinking of you, this must be so tough.

If they are brain tumours I know a little boy who has made a wonderful recovery from a large one he had as a toddler. I hope you get positive news.

Thinking of you and offering a virtual hand to hold. I don't know what to say but you will be in my prayers x

RikersBeard Tue 02-Oct-12 11:44:18

Thinking of you and your family trazzle, and hoping that they can tell you something reassuring soon. X

FreckledLeopard Tue 02-Oct-12 11:47:32

Sending love and prayers over to you, as well as virtual hand holding. If you're anywhere in London, let me know if I can help x

desertgirl Tue 02-Oct-12 11:47:55

Holding you all in the light.

So hope you get some good news soon

kdiddy Tue 02-Oct-12 11:49:00

Thinking about you all. Your poor little DS - will send lots of positive thoughts and wishes his way x

Pyjamadonkey Tue 02-Oct-12 11:51:28

Sending you my best wishes, your little one and of course you are in my prayers x

PelvicFloorClenchReminder Tue 02-Oct-12 11:52:23

Thinking of you and offering virtual hands x

BeaWheesht Tue 02-Oct-12 11:52:31

Thinking of you all x

cocolepew Tue 02-Oct-12 11:54:00

Thinking of you all x

WandaDoff Tue 02-Oct-12 11:56:01

Thinking & praying for you and your family xx

Sometimesiwonder Tue 02-Oct-12 11:59:12

Sorry to hear this, Trazzletoes. Thinking of you and hoping they will come up with some good strong strategies to help. xx

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Tue 02-Oct-12 11:59:50

Thinking of you all.xxxx

NatashaBee Tue 02-Oct-12 12:00:01

Thinking of you today. I second the recommendation for Macmillan.

perfumedlife Tue 02-Oct-12 12:00:15

I'm keeping you all in my prayers xx

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 12:01:30

Thank you all so much. I'm not strong or brave - I can't stop crying, even in front of DCs. Thanks for all your support.

WheresMyCow Tue 02-Oct-12 12:03:48

More hands to hold and more positive thoughts coming your way x

Ilovemyteddy Tue 02-Oct-12 12:04:11

Thinking of you all and will keep you in my prayers xx

tara0202 Tue 02-Oct-12 12:04:52

Sending positive thoughts and wishes. I have a 3 year old too. I hope your little ds will be absolutely.fine. what a terribly worrying and stressful time for you and your family sad x x x

Doyouthinktheysaurus Tue 02-Oct-12 12:08:33

Oh you poor thingsad

There's nothing useful I can apart from to say that I am thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way x

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Tue 02-Oct-12 12:08:38

You cant blame yourself for crying! Dont beat yourself up.

AnyaJetski Tue 02-Oct-12 12:09:36

Thinking of you x

KenDoddsDadsDog Tue 02-Oct-12 12:10:48

Thinking of you xxx

hiviolet Tue 02-Oct-12 12:11:49

I have tears in my eyes just imagining how you feel right now. You are in my thoughts today.

Lots of positive vibes to you, family & your DS.
Another hand to hold if you need it. xx

Katiebeau Tue 02-Oct-12 12:15:29

Another hand to hold here. Life so bloody shit. Thinking of you and your little boy.

FarloWearsAGoldRibbon Tue 02-Oct-12 12:16:34

Sending (((hugs))). My DD developed leukaemia at the same age. l second the recommendation of the Children With Cancer support thread when you are ready. Best wishes for a full and speedy recovery for your DS.

<holds hands>

Thinking of you all. My heart goes out to you x

THERhubarb Tue 02-Oct-12 12:20:29

Don't worry about crying in front of them. They may see that as a sign that they too, can be open with their own emotions rather than trying to hold it all in. Right now you need to support each other and if that support means just hugging and crying each other then that's what you need to do.

It's lunchtime now so do make sure that you eat and drink something even if you don't feel like it. You will need all your strength for your ds and your dd. Your ds is being looked after now, so make sure you look after yourself.

The outcome may not be as bad as you fear. Children are incredibly resilient and they will be doing all they can to help him.

Please know that we are all here thinking of you and I have a candle burning right now for your little boy.

FancyPuffin Tue 02-Oct-12 12:32:26

Thinking of you and your family and sending love x

ISingSoprano Tue 02-Oct-12 12:37:07

How utterly awful for you. Just know that whatever happens from now there are many people thinking of you. x

Oh bless you. I know just how you are feeling.

My thoughts are with you and my only advice is to take it one minute at a time. Try really hard not to let your brain run away with you because it becomes utterly overwhelming.

NoCarbsBeforeBarbs Tue 02-Oct-12 12:45:43

Thinking of you and sending you some positive thoughts.

You sound strong, brave and a wonderful Mummy x

dikkertjedap Tue 02-Oct-12 12:50:03

Trazzle I am so sorry to hear about your DS.

I cannot imagine what you are going through at the moment.

How is your son dealing with being in hospital so far, is there a room where he can play?

I keep everything crossed for you and your DS.

HairyPotter Tue 02-Oct-12 12:58:21

I am so sorry. I hope the news you are waiting for isn't as bad as it seems at the moment.

Thinking of you and your family xx

upsylazy Tue 02-Oct-12 13:07:24

You can have both my hands. Thinking of you all xxx

hmc Tue 02-Oct-12 13:11:39

Trazzle - so sorry, hope the news improves. Please keep posting here for support x

Another hand here... So sorry to hear about this Trazzle, hopefully you'll get some better news soon. In the meantime you have plenty of love and support here.

NopofacehaveI Tue 02-Oct-12 13:15:14

Just want to say I am here and if you need anything practical and are anywhere near Manchester shout me.

I have a friend who's dd is in remission.

Blu Tue 02-Oct-12 13:16:43

So sorry you are going through this, Trazzle.
What a terrible shock.

Hand held.

lunar1 Tue 02-Oct-12 13:19:55

Thinking of you and your family Trazzle

BigStickBIWI Tue 02-Oct-12 13:23:03

<holds out another hand>

SomebodySaveMe Tue 02-Oct-12 13:23:37

Thinking of you and your family.


Alibabaandthe40nappies Tue 02-Oct-12 13:25:28

<holds hand>

D0G Tue 02-Oct-12 13:27:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lovesoftplay Tue 02-Oct-12 13:28:15

Thinking of you and your wee boy. x

MrsWolowitz Tue 02-Oct-12 13:30:46

You're in my thoughts and prayers.

I just don't know what else to say but am here to hand hold.

TanteRose Tue 02-Oct-12 13:36:21

<holds trazzles' hand very tight>


insanityscratching Tue 02-Oct-12 13:37:15

Thinking or you and your little boy and praying for positive news x

Pammym Tue 02-Oct-12 13:41:25

My heart goes out to you all. I really hope you get some good news after his scan.

Lilka Tue 02-Oct-12 13:45:39

I am keeping you and your little boy in my thoughts xx

OneHandWavingFree Tue 02-Oct-12 13:54:29

Another one here holding your hand and holding your little boy in my thoughts. What a nightmare for you - I am hoping and praying for good news and tears of relief x x

Kalypso Tue 02-Oct-12 13:54:53

Oh gosh. Thinking of you and hoping so much the news is positive. Please try to make sure you eat and drink at the usual times (although the adrenaline will make it very hard). It will help keep you resilient while you're waiting for news.<Holds hand and sends virtual hugs> xx

Tuttutitlookslikerain Tue 02-Oct-12 13:58:40

I couldn't read and not post.

I'll hold you and your little boy in my thoughts, as well as the rest of your family.


whattodoo Tue 02-Oct-12 14:01:13

What a terrible time you are going through. My prayers for some positive news.
Squeeze my hand hard whenever you need to. X

LemonBreeland Tue 02-Oct-12 14:02:10

Hoping so much for good news from the scan. Hugs xx

M44 Tue 02-Oct-12 14:04:05

Hello.....have been thinking about you all morning. Will continue to do so.....

GoldenGreen Tue 02-Oct-12 14:04:16

So sorry about this. I hope so much that it is treatable and your little boy will recover. xx

Floggingmolly Tue 02-Oct-12 14:06:05

God bless you both sad

BoffinMum Tue 02-Oct-12 14:08:00

Thinking of you xxx

AvonCallingBarksdale Tue 02-Oct-12 14:09:59

Thinking of you and hoping that you get some positive news xx

Annunziata Tue 02-Oct-12 14:12:06

Praying for you xxx

FoofyShmooffer Tue 02-Oct-12 14:13:22

Thinking of you Trazzle and your boy xx

hellymelly Tue 02-Oct-12 14:15:10

Thinking of you all and your little chap- hope any news is as positive as possible. x x

Herecomesbod Tue 02-Oct-12 14:16:03

Couldn't read and not post. Am keeping you all in my thoughts and hoping you get some positive news xx

thefirstmrsrochester Tue 02-Oct-12 14:17:18

Praying for you both x

doctordwt Tue 02-Oct-12 14:23:27

Thinking of you and sending all luck your way xx

Fizzylemonade Tue 02-Oct-12 14:23:28

Thinking of you all and hope you get positive news.

TweetPetite Tue 02-Oct-12 14:27:43

Reaching out and holding your hands. Praying and thinking of you. X

antshouse Tue 02-Oct-12 14:28:04

Hoping for the best for you all x

mamalovesmojitos Tue 02-Oct-12 14:32:06

((((((((((((hugs)))))))))) for you all. And a tight squeeze of your hand. It is normal to be scared but his doctors know what they are doing. Hoping with all my heart for a speedy recovery xxx.

ProphetOfDoom Tue 02-Oct-12 14:34:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nannyof3 Tue 02-Oct-12 14:37:05

Praying that ur son is ok

Couldn't just read this without posting, will be thinking of you all and hoping that there is a speedy recovery...

janey1234 Tue 02-Oct-12 14:40:29

You have so many hands to hold already, but have mine too. Thinking of you all x

ajandjjmum Tue 02-Oct-12 14:45:36

Just hoping and praying for you.

Tommychoochoo Tue 02-Oct-12 14:49:31

Thinking and praying for you lots of (((hugs))) and another hand to hold x

SizzleSazz Tue 02-Oct-12 14:50:54

Hope the tests are ok and a care plan in place asap. Thinking of you all.

luckoftheirish Tue 02-Oct-12 14:55:48

Thinking of you x

Thumbwitch Tue 02-Oct-12 15:00:37

Very sorry to hear this trazzletoes. I hope that they can operate successfully and sort him out.

My niece had a brain tumour when she was 21mo, in her cerebellum. It took 3m to find it, because doctors didn't really think to look for it - her mum was fobbed off with various diagnoses such as tonsilitis hmm, ear infection, febrile convulsions - eventually my niece couldn't walk because her balance had gone and she was taken to UCH in London, and then transferred to KCH, where she first had an operation to relieve the fluid pressure in her brain (the tumour was blocking the flow of cerebro-spinal fluid) and 2 days later a 9h operation to remove the tumour itself. Nerve wracking in the extreme but a successful outcome - niece is now 7 and still clear of any recurrence (although she is checked annually).

Love and strength to you and your boy (and rest of your family) x

beachyhead Tue 02-Oct-12 15:05:11

Love and thoughts for you both,

Beachy x

ToffeeWhirl Tue 02-Oct-12 15:53:56

I'm here for you too, Trazzle. I really hope you hear some good news soon. x

madwomanintheattic Tue 02-Oct-12 15:58:05


Just wanted to offer my hand to hold too.

I'm thinking of you all x

Thinking and praying for you all. xx

TantieTowie Tue 02-Oct-12 16:23:58

Thinking of you and yours and sending you our very best wishes. xx

Halfling Tue 02-Oct-12 16:25:08

Stay strong! Praying for your DS XXX

Badvoc Tue 02-Oct-12 16:28:41

Thinking of you x

minmooch Tue 02-Oct-12 16:49:40

Trazzle - I am so sorry to read this. My 16 year old son was diagnosed with a brain tumour on 1st November last year, so nearly a year ago. It was, and still is, the most horrific shock and it is a parents worse living nightmare. There is a very good support thread on here for parents of children with cancer where you will receive much understanding when you feel up to joining us there.

I spent 5 and half months living in hospital with my son but have been at home with him since mid March. If there are any questions you would like to ask, practical advice about being in hospital, hand holding or anything please pm me.

I wish you much love and strength as you face this. Xx

ClaudiaWinklepants Tue 02-Oct-12 16:51:37

Thinking of you all & hoping you get positive news xx

BrittaPerry Tue 02-Oct-12 16:54:40

Oh, bless him :-(
Thinking of you and hoping for good news

EugenesAxe Tue 02-Oct-12 16:58:23

I'm very sorry to hear about your son and am holding your hand over the ether. Best wishes for your family.

peacefuleasyfeeling Tue 02-Oct-12 17:01:15

I'm holding you in my heart xxx

Whirliwig72 Tue 02-Oct-12 17:01:17

You are in my prayers - hugs to you and your family

Holding your hand

orangina Tue 02-Oct-12 17:02:19

Sending many positive thoughts your way xx

CinnabarRed Tue 02-Oct-12 17:06:14

Two more hands for you here, xxx

busfull Tue 02-Oct-12 17:08:57

Holding your hand and hoping you get some good news soon.

Approximately Tue 02-Oct-12 17:09:14

Your family are in my thoughts and prayers. x

Sossiges Tue 02-Oct-12 17:13:31

Holding hand and hoping for the best XX

Rindercella Tue 02-Oct-12 17:21:28

Sending lots of strong, positive vibes to you, your DS and your whole family. I really wish your DS well and hope all news from now on is good.

Big hugs to you xx

Another hand holder here, I hope the news is better than you're anticipating xxx

StinkyGOLDfeet Tue 02-Oct-12 17:40:51

Trazzle - I've been where you are and I know how weird and surreal it feels.
Just focus on getting through each moment and you will cope because you have to.

My son's brain tumour was diagnosed just over a year ago; he's been having treatment for the last year and has just 2 months to go until his treatment finishes. It's been a roller coaster I have to say, but we're still here and that's the main thing.

Come to the Children with Cancer thread when you're ready.

My thoughts are with you.

spiderlight Tue 02-Oct-12 17:49:08

Thinking of you and holding your hand, and his.

BananaramaLlama Tue 02-Oct-12 17:54:18

Thinking of you and sending hand holding and hugs.

VenetiaLanyon Tue 02-Oct-12 18:06:13

Thinking of you and your little boy x

5inthebed Tue 02-Oct-12 18:08:08

Thinking of you all.

swooosh Tue 02-Oct-12 18:14:02

hand holding x

Onlyjoking Tue 02-Oct-12 18:22:35

Another one here thinking of you and your DS. It must be a huge shock to all of you. thanks

mynameis Tue 02-Oct-12 18:35:10

Just wanted to add another message of support. Thinking of you all xx

TheAccidentalExhibitionist Tue 02-Oct-12 18:39:48

Another hand to hold here..

Holding hands here to, hope you get some good news soon x

bluebump Tue 02-Oct-12 18:57:46

Thinking of you and your family. Sending positive vibes your way x

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 22:18:47

Gosh, thank you for all your support. I am a little overwhelmed, to say the least.

I'll keep this brief as I need some sleep and have been on the phone to family and friends all evening. I'm emotionally wrung out.

The Doctors have yet to confirm 100% (although they can't see any other alternatives) but they believe DS has neuroblastoma. They have described this to us as a particularly nasty cancer in which many cases aren't treatable.

However, they have said there is still some hope and we are desperately clutching on to that. We should know by the start of next week what we are dealing with.

DS suddenly looks so small and diminished.

But we have to believe it will turn out to be treatable. It will be. And if DS is given the opportunity to fight it, I know he will give it everything he has got.

We are utterly and completely devastated.

The primary tumour is on DS's adrenal glands (and it's not small, either), with 2 secondary tumours behind his eyes. He has complained of stomach pains for as long as I can remember, although they were diagnosed as non-specific food intolerances. I feel physically sick at the thought that this has been growing inside him all that time and I hadn't protected him.

I feel terrible that only this weekend, i told him off, or shouted at him because he was dawdling. Didn't show him enough love. Did the washing up instead of playing with him. Why have I wasted all these precious seconds?

I just want to scoop his little body in to my arms and protect him. Tell him that Mummy can make it all better with a kiss.

I feel so completely broken. How the hell can I be strong for him when I can't even be strong for myself, DD and DH?

cat Tue 02-Oct-12 22:20:35

You are strong. I can see it in your posts. You are a good mum.

HUGS to you and your family.

I will pray for your DS tonight


Hassled Tue 02-Oct-12 22:22:11

I'm so sorry - I can't begin to imagine the hell you must be going through.
But please don't waste time dwelling on the "wasted moments" - those were just moments that come with being a parent, and you're clearly a very loving, committed parent. You will be in my thoughts.

bonnieslilsister Tue 02-Oct-12 22:25:53

Oh Trazzle I am so sorry. I don't know what to say. Please don't worry about telling him off etc that means nothing. You love each other, he knows it and you know it. Your strength will show by your being by his side.

IwishIwasmoreorganised Tue 02-Oct-12 22:30:30

Trazzle, up until now you were a normal mum to a normal little boy and you both did normal things which would have included housework - we all do it.

Now your whole world has been rocked and you're bound to be looking back and reflecting on things. But you can't change any of that. You are there for your ds now, you will stay strong and support him in every way that you possible can throughout this awful ordeal.

There is lots of virtual support on here. Can we do anything more practical to help? Would you like to say what hospital you're at and if you need or would like anything bringing in?

I'm so desperately sorry for you. Please don't let guilt a way in. You can tell from the way you write your boy is so lucky to have you as his mum. Crossing everything and hoping for the best and wishing you every ounce of strength.

runnervt Tue 02-Oct-12 22:31:39

So sorry to hear this. I will pray for you all.

HumphreyCobbler Tue 02-Oct-12 22:32:01

I am so sorry. Your little boy knows how much you love him.

bleedingheart Tue 02-Oct-12 22:33:13

I am so sorry for you all, I really hope you get some better news. You couldn't have known this was happening. Your love and strength shine through.
Holding your hand x

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 22:35:04

Thanks, everyone keeps saying that, but it's hard to make myself believe it. I love him so much.

I'm maybe a little sensitive as well because his presenting symptoms meant that we were referred to Social Services for possible child abuse before the diagnosis was made. I've been questioning myself all last night.

Thanks for offers of help - there have been several on here but I don't think anyone who has posted their whereabouts on here is in my area. I will thank you for your offers of support and maybe see where we are after the weekend, when we will know what the way forward is. If he can e treated it's going to be a long and difficult process, we know that, and I'm sure there will be days when I'm begging someone on here to pop in to the ward to make me feel human again. I really appreciate it. I really do. It's good to know we are not alone xxx

expatinscotland Tue 02-Oct-12 22:35:31

Trazzle, another hand to hold here.xx

QOD Tue 02-Oct-12 22:36:17

I'm so sorry, poor little sausage x

TheLightPassenger Tue 02-Oct-12 22:37:35

So sorry you are going through this. Thoughts with you and your family.

ProphetOfDoom Tue 02-Oct-12 22:37:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

So sorry to hear this. Stay strong and positive x

BeaLola Tue 02-Oct-12 22:38:04

Trazzle I'm so desperately sorry to read your posts. Other posts have said more eloquently than I can that your love and strength is there and will be helping you rbeautiful boy. I am praying for your little one & you & your family.

cocolepew Tue 02-Oct-12 22:38:06

I'm so sorry you didn't get better news. Look forward, not back x

chocolateistheenemy Tue 02-Oct-12 22:39:31

Im so sorry Trazzle. Don't add guilt to your load. You're the same as the rest of us... We're all here for you. Xxxx

maytheoddsbeeverinyourfavour Tue 02-Oct-12 22:40:50

Oh you poor darling, I can't begin to imagine what you're going through sad

I'm so so sorry this is happening, it must be such an unbelievable shock to you all

How is your little poppet feeling? Probably a stupid question but is he ok in himself? Is he comfortable and not in too much pain?

You will get through this,just take each day, each minute one at a time. You will be strong for your darling boy but you don't have to be strong all of the time, no one expects that of you

None of this is your fault and no precious time has been wasted, even when you were doing boring mundane things and telling him off he was surrounded in a cocoon of love, he has been loved since he entered the world and he will know and feel that so please don't feel guilty that you haven't done enough, you have, you are his mummy and all those little things are part of being a mummy

Sending love and strength to you all xxxx

cogitosum Tue 02-Oct-12 22:41:45

I'm so sorry and sending lots of love xxx hope you get some better news next week

CreamolaFoamFan Tue 02-Oct-12 22:41:57

I'm so sorry. Thinking of you and hoping for the best.

Marrow Tue 02-Oct-12 22:43:41

I'm so sorry to hear about your poor DS. You may feel broken but you will find a way through this. Do not feel any guilt. You had no way of knowing what was wrong with your DS and you were simply getting on with life as we all do, trying to fit everything in. He knows that you love him.

Please let us know if we can do anything practical to help. There will be a Mimsnetter near you willing to help. Will be thinking of you and your family.

Sossiges Tue 02-Oct-12 22:44:47

Thinking of you all xxx

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 22:45:15

It's hard to tell how he is feeling as we were up til 3am so he is exhausted, but he seems to be his usual darling self.

I know it's unwise to post pictures of one's children in public but I've added a photo of him to my profile so you can see how totally adorable he is. His spirit matches him completely. He's so gentle and loving. I'm off to bed now. Really I am. Need sleep.

chocolateistheenemy Tue 02-Oct-12 22:45:17

Where are you? One or more of us will be nearby x

Ruprekt Tue 02-Oct-12 22:45:24

You are in my thoughts and prayers and i just cannot imagine what you are going through.

Please ask for help and there will be someone there for you. I am in Berks if that helps.


I'm in east Anglia if there is anything I can do to help.

I am thinking of you all, and the fight ahead of you, because there will be a fight and you will stand firm by your sons side.


FarloWearsAGoldRibbon Tue 02-Oct-12 22:48:45

Trazzle if it is neuroblastoma, this charity can maybe help and give you support:

The two families we know whose children received the same diagnosis have used them for support and fundraising for treatment abroad.

Do not beat yourself up about missing this until now or misunderstanding the symptoms. That is completely the norm for this disease. I remember all too well being cross and frustrated with DD for being whinging and difficult for weeks just before her leukaemia diagnosis. It makes you feel awful in retrospect, but doing that at the time is normal too. These illnesses hide and look like nothing much until they are larger than you might think. DD's bone marrow was almost all leukaemia cells at diagnosis, but even then the gp still thought she just had a bug until tests showed otherwise.

Teladi Tue 02-Oct-12 22:48:51

Your son is gorgeous! Thinking of you all. xx

bonnieslilsister Tue 02-Oct-12 22:49:14

He looks beautiful. I am in central scotland. x

naturalbaby Tue 02-Oct-12 22:50:18

You poor thing. You've had such a massive shock. Your ds is gorgeous, one of mine is the same age.
I hope you get some rest and sleep.

I'm in the Midlands.


Jakadaal Tue 02-Oct-12 22:50:52

Adding to the circle of hand holding x

BeaWheesht Tue 02-Oct-12 22:51:13

I am sending all the strength and positive vibes I cAn muster to you xxxx

FarloWearsAGoldRibbon Tue 02-Oct-12 22:51:22

Oh, he is so adorable!

NE Scotland here btw

onedev Tue 02-Oct-12 22:51:54

I'm so sorry your beautiful boy is going through this. You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about & you'll find amazing strength because you are strong (although it may not feel like it).

[I'm on my phone so can't access PMs properly but I'm in Solihull if that's anywhere nearby.]

Wishing you & your family all the very best.

thefirstmrsrochester Tue 02-Oct-12 22:52:03

Trazzle, he is an absolutely gorgeous child.
I'm praying so hard for you all.
I am in Glasgow and ready to offer any assistance xxxx

cat Tue 02-Oct-12 22:52:04


He is a cutey! And with footballer hair already at 3 grin

Try and get some sleep tonight lovey x

Where abouts are you? Just in case one of us can be of some help?


Oh no, firstly what a gorgeous little boy you have, such a cheeky smile!

Secondly, I cant say anything to make you feel better, but if I could put my arms around you I would. Thinking of all of you, much much love coming from London xxx

Beeboles Tue 02-Oct-12 22:52:23

Thinking of you all x

cat Tue 02-Oct-12 22:53:14

X-Posts with everyone!

I'm in Kent mostly. But frequently in SE London


He is indeed totally adorable. I'm so sorry for you all, I really am. Will be thinking of you. xxx

expatinscotland Tue 02-Oct-12 22:53:59

He's beautiful! smile

Halfling Tue 02-Oct-12 22:54:09

Trazzletoes, your DS is adorable. My thoughts and prayers are with him XXX

Sossiges Tue 02-Oct-12 22:55:20

He's a real cutie. Love the chin!

Trazzletoes Tue 02-Oct-12 22:56:03

Thank you all - to avoid every single person on the thread outing themselves, I can confirm that I'm in Yorkshire so thank you for all your offers of help, but none of you are near me x

starfish71 Tue 02-Oct-12 22:56:27

Sending strength and prayers for your gorgeous little boy and all your family. Hope you all get a little rest tonight xxx

cocolepew Tue 02-Oct-12 22:56:39

Beautiful boy smile

Chigley1 Tue 02-Oct-12 22:57:37

Thinking of you all x

OneHandWavingFree Tue 02-Oct-12 22:58:23

What a sweet little face he has. He is just beautiful. I can only begin to imagine how you must be feeling. I am so, so sorry that you have to go through this.

You sound like a wonderful, loving mummy and you have no reason to beat yourself up. There is no way in this world that you could have anticipated this.

I am praying for you all. I hope you get some sleep.

hellymelly Tue 02-Oct-12 22:59:13

He is a beautiful child. What a terrible shock for all of you. I am in West Wales if that is any help- where are you? Hope you all manage to get some sleep. x x x

cynner Tue 02-Oct-12 23:02:54

Much much love and support to your beautiful boy..and your family. I wish I was more articulate and could offer more comforting words. I shall pray for you all.

dearprudence Tue 02-Oct-12 23:03:26

Your son is beautiful. I am so so sorry this is happening to you all. Wishing you love and strength xx

Trazzle your son and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Holding your hand. I desperately hope your DS can be successfully treated.

I'm in Manchester but not far from the Woodhead pass if that's any use to you.


JuliaFlyte Tue 02-Oct-12 23:07:02

Oh your boy is beautiful. What a terrible ordeal for your family, thinking of you x

AgnesBligg Tue 02-Oct-12 23:07:36

He is lovely, you must be proud.x

Another hand to hold, and I send prayers that his condition will be cured.

JustSpiro Tue 02-Oct-12 23:08:19

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I'm right at the other end of the country unfortunately so not much help on a practical level, but will be thinking of you all and praying that the prognosis is as encouraging as possible under the circumstances.

peggyblackett Tue 02-Oct-12 23:09:28

Sending you love trazzle. What an adorable ds you have x

toomuch2young Tue 02-Oct-12 23:10:05

What a gorgeous little boy.
Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
Lots of handholding and strength here. Hope you can all get some sleep tonight x

Oh Trazzle...

I don't know you but want to offer another hand to hold.

As others have said the nearest to advice I can offer is to take one moment at a time and concentrate on the present, not the past, as best you can. I've no direct childhood cancer experience, just time in hospital with DD.

We were provided free on site accommodation by the Sick Childrens Trust during our stay, in a communal house. Do you have access to anywhere to stay? The pull down beds on the wards in the hospitals we experienced aren't conducive in any way to rest and whilst you must be running on adrenaline at the moment there must come a time when that will run out. I don't think SCT have anything in the area but if you were comfortable with naming the hospital I'd be happy to take a look into if anything else that might be available if you don't have the time/energy/inclination.

Sending you every best wish and positive thought.

Lilka Tue 02-Oct-12 23:13:31

What a handsome little man he is

Still thinking of you all x

perfumedlife Tue 02-Oct-12 23:13:54

This is strange. I've been so busy all day but couldn't stop thinking about your wee boy and just saw his picture and he is exactly as I was imagining him today. Exactly the image I had in my head of this wee warrior. And he will fight this.

Praying so hard for him x

skyebluesapphire Tue 02-Oct-12 23:15:29

dont know what to say apart from so sorry to hear this. have been praying for your DS and will continue to do so.

keep positive thoughts xx

PrincessSymbian Tue 02-Oct-12 23:16:24

Hope you are managing to get some sleep. Really sorry this is happening sad

maytheoddsbeeverinyourfavour Tue 02-Oct-12 23:17:13

He is so very gorgeous

I'm glad he's feeling ok if not a bit tired, I hope you all manage to get some rest we will all be sending positive vibes your way while you sleep xxx

SageBush Tue 02-Oct-12 23:19:14

What a beautiful boy you have. I'm so sorry about the news you've received today. Sending strength to you, your son, and your whole family.

Bunbaker Tue 02-Oct-12 23:20:29

Your family and gorgeous little boy are in my thoughts and prayers. I see that you are in Yorkshire. Is it the children's hospital in Sheffield or are you in Leeds? Both hospitals are fantastic and I hope your son makes a good recovery.

InVeryveryBadTaste Tue 02-Oct-12 23:20:43

You don't know me either - but we are all here for you and your family. You can do this I promise, and we will help you every step of the way if you want us to. Xx

My thoughts are with you all.

MaryPoppinsBag Tue 02-Oct-12 23:23:01

Thinking of you and your beautiful boy. X

kohl Tue 02-Oct-12 23:27:31

I am so so sorry this is happening, hope you manage to get some sleep.x

justbogoffnow Tue 02-Oct-12 23:30:51

Gorgeous boy. Sending positive vibes x

OpenMindedSceptic Tue 02-Oct-12 23:31:12

Gorgeous little boy!
Will be thinking of you. Get some sleep and stay strong.

chickydoo Tue 02-Oct-12 23:31:14

I have 3 friends who's children have had neuroblastoma.
Different ages different degrees.
All 3 children are now fine & well.
Don't give up hope.
My thoughts are with you

5inthebed Tue 02-Oct-12 23:36:06

Your son is adorable. Thinking of you all x

DizzyCow63 Tue 02-Oct-12 23:36:32

Thinking of you and your family, especially your lovely son x

bobkate Tue 02-Oct-12 23:37:25

Gracious - what a horrific shock for you, and for your family and friends. You must be reeling. He looks like a real poppet and I will hold him and you in my thoughts xx

FarrowAndBollock Tue 02-Oct-12 23:47:03

Thinking of you too. I hope Chickdoo's message above gives you some hope. xx

aristocat Tue 02-Oct-12 23:48:01

Trazzle, I am so sorry.
Another hand to hold and sending you all ((hugs))

Thumbwitch Tue 02-Oct-12 23:51:08

Trazzle - sorry to hear about the diagnosis but I hope chickydoo's message gives you a positive outlook on the situation.

Your DS is lovely, btw - very cheeky-looking!

More love and strength to you all x

Itsallabout Tue 02-Oct-12 23:54:19


My hand is holding yours tight and my other is around your shoulder.

You will get through this a day at a time. Your overwhelming and unfaltering love for your baby boy will give you the strength to meet this head on.

Please don't feel guilt of what if's and why's. Move forward and know you have always and will always be the best Mummy.

My thoughts are with you .

ToffeeWhirl Tue 02-Oct-12 23:56:32

He looks such a sweet-natured boy, Trazzle. I hope you both manage to get some sleep tonight (although it can't be easy with the baby too). Hopefully, now that you have told your family and friends you will get some RL support, as well as MN support. Have been thinking of you all day. x

2mummies Wed 03-Oct-12 00:20:26

So very sorry to read of your unbearable situation. There are times that feel completely un-recoverable from, but you sound to be a strong and loving family, and however horrendously bad it feels, and however much you just wish it wasn't happening, you will pull through it, together, hour by hour, day by day, just keep loving each other and looking after yourselves, and no matter what, you will get through it. You've no choice but to be strong for your children, and you are, even when you are crying. Your their mummy and daddy, and nothing is more comfort to them than that.

I hope and pray that your adorable boy can be treated and brought back to full health. My thoughts are with you and your family tonight.

beautyfades Wed 03-Oct-12 00:23:40

holding you hand sweetheart xxxxxxxxx

Fozzleyplum Wed 03-Oct-12 00:28:00

Another hand-holder here, Trazzle. Your little boy is beautiful.x

AnxiousElephant Wed 03-Oct-12 00:37:01

Trazzle, I couldn't read and not post. So, so sorry for your ds and your family. sad. You couldn't have known sweetheart so please don't beat yourself about that, we all poo poo the tummy aches sometimes as they can be symptoms of anything. Here is another set of hands to hold xxx

18wksplus Wed 03-Oct-12 01:43:48

Sending you lots of hand-holding, hugs and support from across the Atlantic.

Please look after yourself: eat, shower, and allow yourself time to react however you want and need to.

You, your family and the doctors treating your son will be in my prayers.


noelstudios Wed 03-Oct-12 01:57:09

Trazzle, holding your hands very tightly xxx

MollyMurphy Wed 03-Oct-12 02:48:19

Praying you get good news Trazzle. Thinking of you.....

humblebumble Wed 03-Oct-12 03:42:48

Squeezing your hand ever so gently.

cher31 Wed 03-Oct-12 04:17:48

So sorry. Sending lots of positive wishes your way. I'm in Leeds. If I can do anything at any point I'm there. Big hug and kiss xx

So sorry this is happening to your DS and your family. My DS is the same age. Thinking of you and hoping for good news. You sound like a lovely Mum doing her best in an awful situation.

Iteotwawki Wed 03-Oct-12 05:00:06

He's so gorgeous!

Another one who couldn't read and not post although I imagine words are cold comfort right now.

Holding hands, offering hugs and thoughts. Will light the candles for your gorgeous wee boy tonight.

Please go easy on yourself - try to make sure you eat at least once a day, drink plenty and try to rest when you can.

HeffalumpsAndGoldenWoozles Wed 03-Oct-12 06:13:50

I've just seen this in active convos, what an awful thing to be having to go through. Words always sound so flat, know you are being thought of and your beautiful boy is going to be in a lot of people's prayers tonight.

Hand holding and thinking of you xx

Trazzle, I'm in Yorkshire. Work in Sheffield but travel miles throughout Yorkshire every week. I can help whenever you are ready.

I hope you have been able to get some sleep tonight - thinking of you all. Your little boy is gorgeous xx

EdMcDunnough Wed 03-Oct-12 07:05:11

What a gorgeous, sweet looking boy.

I am so sorry to read what they've said. I don't know anything about this illness but I will pray for your little lad and for all of you x

strictlycaballine Wed 03-Oct-12 07:34:36

Trazzletoes just wanted to post on this thread to say "hello" and that everyone on the Fledgling Fly thread is behind you and thinking of you xxx

InfinityWelcomesCarefulDrivers Wed 03-Oct-12 07:38:49

Trazzletoes I am so sorry to hear this. I don't even know what to say. Desperately hoping he's treated quickly and home to play very soon xx
(im stealthpolarbear btw)

4nomore Wed 03-Oct-12 08:15:04

Thinking of you all

WheresMyCow Wed 03-Oct-12 09:06:15

Your boy is gorgeous Trazzle

Hope that you managed to get some sleep, thinking of you all x

BuffyFairy Wed 03-Oct-12 09:18:09

<waves at Trazzletoes>

I'm so sorry to hear your news. I haven't read the whole thread, will catch up soon.

He will fight, sweetheart, you have faith. I'll be there to support you, anything you need.

I'll pop back later.

expatinscotland Wed 03-Oct-12 09:33:44

Hope you get some answers soon, Trazzle.

My daughter spent from November, 2011-July, 2012 in an oncology unit and there were many we met who had neuroblastoma. We know a couple who have travelled to other countries for treatment if the NHS couldn't help them.

Let me know if I can help in any way. xxx

piratecat Wed 03-Oct-12 09:35:49

morning Trazzletoes, you poor love, i am so sorry to read of your news.

Firstly, your son, he is absolutely gorgeous, wow you must be so proud!!

As someone else said, up till now you have been mummy, doing normal mummy things. Some of those things are really boring and have to be done otherwise we would be surrounded by dishes, mess, rubbish. You love for him shines through and i can understand your shock right now, perfectly natural.
There IS hope, the doctors have said. I can sympthise with feeling you should have done more, you didn't know why he's been poorly, and have been there when you get a bit narked when they seem to be ill, or dawdling and all you are trying to do is get things done.
Please try to eat. Drink lots of tea, maybe they have a salad bar in the hospital cafe? or some flapjacks are good for a bit of an energy boost?
Washbag, and fresh clothes if someone can go home for you and get those? Moisturiser, sounds trivial but it can freshen you up and rehydrate you a bit.
Does ds have his fave cuddly with him? xxxx

festivalwidow Wed 03-Oct-12 09:38:32

Sending thoughts and prayers to all of you from here. xx

Am sending thoughts and prayers to you all xxxx

ToffeeWhirl Wed 03-Oct-12 09:43:15

I hope you and your son managed to get some rest last night, Trazzle. Good luck today. I hope you get some better news.

BerryPie Wed 03-Oct-12 09:48:06

I am so sorry that you are all going through this. There is always, always hope. You are in my thoughts xxx

crappypatty Wed 03-Oct-12 09:48:41

Sending positive thoughts and hope to you and your family, he is adorable x

MiggleMoo Wed 03-Oct-12 09:49:20

Trazzle, I am so desperately sorry for what you are going through. Neuroblastoma is a horrid cancer but the rates for survival are good. As soemone said earlier there is a really good charity called Families against Neuroblastoma, they have a FB page and website and offer lots of support both emotionally and practically.

My nephew was diagnosed with this last year, after operations and a time in GOSH he appears to be making a full recovery. My thoughts, prayers and wishes are with you for the same outcome. Xxx

orangina Wed 03-Oct-12 10:20:18

Oh Trazzle, so sorry to hear your news, can imagine your head will be all over the place with this. Really hope you managed to get some sleep last night and that your lovely boy gets the best possible treatment. Am thinking of you both. x

LemonBreeland Wed 03-Oct-12 11:11:38

Trazzle, so very sorry to hear the news. Your little boy is gorgeous, and it just defies all logic that little children get sick with cancer.

I hope that you get some better news next week in relation to treatment.

BarmeeMarmee Wed 03-Oct-12 11:34:44

Trazzle so sorry the news wasn't better for you all. Your boy is gorgeous - and with such mischief and delight in his eyes smile. He looks like he has spirit in bucket loads.

I'm nowhere near Yorkshire but am reaching out and still hand holding across the ether.

If there is anything you need (piles of magazines maybe? (for you and him!)) or anything practical I can send I am more than happy to...

Sending love and more prayers.

MrsWolowitz Wed 03-Oct-12 11:37:52

Thinking of you x

Ebb Wed 03-Oct-12 11:39:45

Your little man is gorgeous. I'm sorry you're going through this. Thinking of you and your family. X

MNP Wed 03-Oct-12 11:45:29

Trazzletoes you and your family are in my thoughts.

THERhubarb Wed 03-Oct-12 12:50:25

There is so much pain around at the moment sad

I am so sorry that the news was the worst it could be. I am devastated for you which sounds trite since I don't know you, but I think news like this affects every mother.

Sending you all the love I can.

FunnysInLaJardin Wed 03-Oct-12 13:06:11

so sorry about the probable diagnosis. Your baby is

TakingTheStairs Wed 03-Oct-12 13:28:20

Trazzletoes , your DS is gorgeous. A very handsome little man.

I'm in SW London if I can help in any way xx

MissBetseyTrotwood Wed 03-Oct-12 14:11:19

E London here. Likewise, if we can help in any way. If he is at GOSH at any point it's a hop skip and a jump for us so just holler.

He's a beautiful boy, with a family who will be with him the whole way through this journey. We have lit a candle for you all and will be thinking of you all and sending as much positivity as we can.


chasingtail Wed 03-Oct-12 14:29:34

Holding your hand....

I'm holding your hand Trazzle

I'm so desperately sorry this is happening to you. Your wee man is beautiful.

I'm in W.Yorks and willing to help in any way I can.

So sorry Trazzle but hopefully you'll have a good idea what you're dealing with.

I've got a friend who's ds was diagnosed with a brain tumour just before his first birthday and was treated in Sheffield. He's just started reception and has come so far since those first awful days you're in now.

Thinking of you and your beautiful ds.

milkshake3 Wed 03-Oct-12 15:05:51

Thinking of you and your family. Big hugs. X

Norem Wed 03-Oct-12 15:25:50

Thinking about you all up here in Glasgow.
Was speaking to two children's cancer nurses yesterday, they were lovely, hope you have some fab ones looking after you all. X

cappucinogirl4 Wed 03-Oct-12 15:56:40

Hi Trazzle
Just wanted to say my thoughts are with you and your little boy.
I am in West Yorkshire and if there is ANYTHING I can do to help please,please get in touch

dikkertjedap Wed 03-Oct-12 16:55:33

Trazzletoes I am so so sorry to hear the bad news. I very much hope that you get some better news at the start of next week.

Can your DS be treated at the hospital where he now is or does he need to be transferred?

Thinking of you and your DS.

Willabywallaby Wed 03-Oct-12 18:28:04

Thinking of you all x

Halfling Wed 03-Oct-12 18:34:42

Trazzle, I am thinking of you and your DS and sending lots of positive wishes your way. There are so many wonderful stories of children recovering from cancer and I am praying that your DS makes a full recovery.

I am in Berks, but if there is anything I can do to help, please get in touch.

Sirzy Wed 03-Oct-12 18:36:05

I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. Like many others have said I may not be local but if there is anything that we can do to help even slightly then please say


Flossiechops Wed 03-Oct-12 18:45:57

sad so sorry it must be devastating for you all ((((hugs)))) keeping you in my thoughts

Kittenkatzen Wed 03-Oct-12 18:51:41

Thinking of you and your family sad x

dimplebum Wed 03-Oct-12 19:00:28

Thinking of you trazzle at this difficult time, stay positive, I'm sure your gorgeous boy can beat this!
Im also in Yorkshire, if there's anything at all I can do I would love to help in any way

scarlettsmummy2 Wed 03-Oct-12 19:01:12

I have two daughters the same age as your two. I can't begin to imagine how you are feeling but my thoughts are with you. You will find the strength to get through it xxx

Engelsemama Wed 03-Oct-12 19:23:59

You and yours and in my thoughts and prayers trazzle.

Sunflowergirl2011 Wed 03-Oct-12 19:29:46

I'm so sorry. Thinking of your family. Pleas try not to feel guilty, you were doing what every other mum on the world needs to do, you son knows he is loved and that is the most important thing,

Tikkabillajive Wed 03-Oct-12 19:30:10

Trazzle I am so very sorry that you are going through this. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Oh Trazzle, I'm so sorry. My thoughts are with you, I know how horrible this is. We are 17 years on from DS having medulloblastoma and I'm in W Yorks (he was treated at LGI). If you need anything please PM me x

I'm sorry to hear about your little boy sad
Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family xxxxxx

RubyrooUK Wed 03-Oct-12 19:37:38

Trazzle, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I have no experience with children's cancer and am not near Yorkshire but saw this in active threads and wanted to add my support and best wishes. X

ggirl Wed 03-Oct-12 19:50:56

another hand to hold here...for your gorgeous boy

pearlgirl Wed 03-Oct-12 19:58:03

Thinking of you and your family. Your son looks so lovely. I'm in Yorkshire so please get in touch if you need/want to.

PiedWagtail Wed 03-Oct-12 20:03:01

Have just read this and seen your news. I am so so sorry to hear of your wee boy's diagnosis. Sending you loads of love and prayers.

SuperSesame Wed 03-Oct-12 20:16:17

Your son is very cute.
Sending you some strength for the next few weeks

Reallynotsureaboutthis Wed 03-Oct-12 20:27:35

OP I've just seen this. I am sendings all the positivity and good vibes I can, hoping that your darling boy has a chance to fight this. My heartfelt thoughts and prayers are with you and your DH, and of course your lovely little boy.

olivo Wed 03-Oct-12 21:11:14

Trazzle, so sorry to hear about your little boy's diagnosis. I'll be thinking of you all and praying hard for all of you. Stay strong. X

Trazzletoes Wed 03-Oct-12 23:04:41

I have just videoed him sleeping. He looks so peaceful and blissfully unaware of the journey ahead.

I have just learned that he sings in his sleep. I never knew that about him.

Learned today that the bastard cancer in his head could eat his beautiful blue eyes and skull. Bastard bastard bastard.

winnybella Wed 03-Oct-12 23:11:05

I'm so so sorry. I hope that the treatment is possible. Sending you love and strength.

perfumedlife Wed 03-Oct-12 23:17:29

(((())))) I am praying Trazzletoes.

MrsApplepants Wed 03-Oct-12 23:18:12

So sorry to hear of your little boy's diagnosis, I hope so much that treatment is possible and successful. Sending love to you and your beautiful boy xx

SummerRain Wed 03-Oct-12 23:22:55

Oh honey {hugs}

He has a fantastic loving family who will lend him their strength for what's to come. Let us lend you our strength and use us as a release so that you can keep being the fierce loving mother that shines through in your posts for as long as it takes for him to get better.

Checking in to see how you're doing this evening. You know where we are overnight if you need/want to talk, rant, shout, ramble about seemingly unrelated stuff that you need to get off your chest at 2am.

Thinking about you all. There are no words. Here for you whatever you need and whenever you need it xx

((((hugs)))) Trazzle, I am so sorry. Thinking of you, and hoping you get quick answers and sucessful treatment xx

AnxiousElephant Wed 03-Oct-12 23:37:12

I just wanted to say I'm sending love and willing you all through this sad. Wishing you all strength through this journey xx

FarloWearsAGoldRibbon Wed 03-Oct-12 23:42:22


Just hang on when you can to the fact that however evil and awful this is, there are many kids out there who do get through this. I know a beautiful little girl just a little older than your DS who got an aggressive form of neuroblastoma as a baby and the odds were really against her. She is over a year off treatment now and she is glorious and thriving.

When you can't hang on, cry as much as you can let yourself. It took me what felt like forever to come to terms with the fact that my beautiful innocent 3yo had cancer. It is OK to fall apart. It is OK to rant and swear and scream and lean on anyone who will listen. It is OK to have days you feel like running screaming and that the whole world doesn't make sense any more and think you can't do this. You will find a way to pick yourself up again and do what needs to be done, even though it feels like an impossible ask right now.

Hoping with everything I've got that all the tests come back showing this can be fought and beaten. In the meantime talk here and on the other thread as much as you want to. thanks

(((massive hugs)))
Praying for your gorgeous little boy. x

Sending you hugs and prayers Trazzle xx

dikkertjedap Wed 03-Oct-12 23:48:38

Oh Trazzle, I am so sorry that you have had more bad news. I so much hope that treatment is possible and this horrible cancer can be stopped.

Lots of hugs.

FarrowAndBollock Wed 03-Oct-12 23:59:00

So sorry OP. I hope you get better news later in the week. Take care.

NeDeLaMer Wed 03-Oct-12 23:59:10

Trazzle - what a terrible shock for you all sad Cancer is indeed a bastard. It is beyond comprehension when it strikes anyone, let alone a child.

DS is completely adorable - a very beautiful child indeed! Bet he takes after his Mum wink

Please stop beating yourself up for being a 'normal' Mum with a 'normal' child - we all chivy them along when they're dawdling painfully and get cross with them when they're being annoying and get on with jobs that need doing even when they want to play - it's normal life!

Sending lots of love and strength x

Scruffybear Thu 04-Oct-12 00:06:17

Holding your hand and willing you and your gorgeous little one all the strength I possibly can. Each day at a time sweetie, thinking and praying for you xx

onedev Thu 04-Oct-12 00:06:49

Complete & utter fucking bastard indeed.

Wishing you strength.

dimplebum Thu 04-Oct-12 00:09:16

I haven't been able to stop thinking about you, your beautiful boy and family this evening. I have children of very similar ages to yours and your posts have really touched me. You are such an amazing, courageous mum.
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please do let me know if there is anything at all I can do to help as I am local.

BuffyFairy Thu 04-Oct-12 01:20:37

Holding your hand very tightly. I've been thinking about you and your family all day. It is a bastard.

Please don't feel guilty about anything. You are a lovely, kind, amazing person and a fantastic mother to your dc. They have a great family life and know they mean the world to you. We all have to do the normal stuff instead of playing all the time, you can't berate yourself for that.

Your ds is so beautiful. All of us here are praying for him. He's strong and so are you.

Sending you all the strength in the world xxx

Thumbwitch Thu 04-Oct-12 01:58:17

More (((hugs))) for you here.
I love that your boy sings in his sleep, how wonderful! really hope that they can treat him before any further damage is done.

Bastard indeed. sad

elliepac Thu 04-Oct-12 07:04:01

Morning trazzle, popping over from the fledgling thread to say we are all thinking of you and praying for you and your lovely family. If there is anything we/I can do be it an mn visit or practical help, please pm me. I am very close to you.

Take care.

SecretCermonials Thu 04-Oct-12 07:14:05

Think of you and your beautiful boy x

MissBetseyTrotwood Thu 04-Oct-12 07:30:09

Morning trazzletoes xx

RnB Thu 04-Oct-12 07:38:39

I have a beautiful image of your boy singing in his sleep...

Love and strength to you during this dreadful time ...x

Trazzletoes Thu 04-Oct-12 08:08:11

Morning. DS has been crying because he's fasting for his anaesthetic. He's having fun watching Bob the builder though. The calm before the storm.

Hi Trazzle, fingers crossed for today. Hugs and handholding.

BarmeeMarmee Thu 04-Oct-12 08:20:14

Good old Bob The Builder! Hoping today goes well x

Good luck!

You're in my thoughts!

TanteRose Thu 04-Oct-12 08:24:04

Hugs to you all, trazzle x
Will be thinking of you

Thinking of you today. x

dikkertjedap Thu 04-Oct-12 08:46:00

Will be thinking of you today.

CinnabarRed Thu 04-Oct-12 08:53:33

You'll be in my thoughts and my prayers all day today.

BuffyFairy Thu 04-Oct-12 08:56:12

Morning Trazzle, hope you got some sleep last night. Best of luck today, will be thinking of you all and sending lots of love and positive vibes x

LemonEmmaP Thu 04-Oct-12 09:01:27

Thinking of you and your gorgeous boy x

cakeslover Thu 04-Oct-12 09:07:56

Thinking of you and our family. Your son is gorgeous!
It is nobody's fault, life can be bloody unfair. So please, please do not blame yourself.
Hopefully he will make a full recovery and all of you will be able to have a normal life again.
Wishing you strength and all the best.

Thinking of you today and sending positive vibes xx

SummerRain Thu 04-Oct-12 09:15:15

Hope today goes as smoothly as possible x

AfternoonsandCoffeespoons Thu 04-Oct-12 09:16:24

Oh, darling. I've just seen this. I've got no words. Just sending lots of love and prayers for you and your beautiful little boy. xxxxx

Alibabaandthe40nappies Thu 04-Oct-12 09:20:22

Trazzle I'm thinking of you today and sending you and your boy strength.

Love and prayers xx

InfinityWelcomesCarefulDrivers Thu 04-Oct-12 09:57:47


Fairylea Thu 04-Oct-12 10:45:05

Wish I had a magic wand for you.

My heart goes out to you.

Halfling Thu 04-Oct-12 10:55:13

Sending lots of love and good wishes to your DS. I am praying that he stays strong during his treatment and recovers fully.

Trazzle - I have only just seen your post but like many others, couldn't read and run.

So sorry that things are the way they are at the moment. But as many have said, don't beat yourself up about what you might have done; until you got the shock news, you were not to know that things were anything other than normal, so you would have acted normally.

Offering hand to hold, hugs, and positive thoughts to you and your family. x

MakeHayNotStraw Thu 04-Oct-12 11:36:49

I've only just seen this, and I am so sorry Trazzle. Words are nothing but my heart is aching for you and your beautiful boy - my dd is the same age. I am praying for you too.

ToffeeWhirl Thu 04-Oct-12 11:45:34

So sorry your boy was upset because he was hungry. That must have been so hard for you. I hope all goes well today - and that he is able to have a good meal later. Thinking of you and your boy every day. x

hellymelly Thu 04-Oct-12 11:50:33

Thinking of you today. x

MrsEdinburgh Thu 04-Oct-12 11:52:43

Thinking of you xxx

TheLaineyWayIsEssex Thu 04-Oct-12 12:00:21

you and your darling boy are in my thoughts today

Yorkpud Thu 04-Oct-12 12:02:51

So so sorry to hear such terrible news. Thinking of your little boy, you and your

bobkate Thu 04-Oct-12 12:14:04

Thinking of you and your gorgeous boy. x

saffronwblue Thu 04-Oct-12 12:14:39

Thinking of you and your family today.

Piemistress Thu 04-Oct-12 12:22:30

Thinking of you Trazzle and your beautiful DS xx

Thumbwitch Thu 04-Oct-12 12:30:02

Trazzle, hope today has gone well for you and your DS - did you mention what the operation he was having today was? I missed it if so - but whatever, I hope it was a success.
(((hugs))) x

THERhubarb Thu 04-Oct-12 13:28:21

I don't know what else to say. Your last update nearly had me in tears. sad

I just cannot imagine the pain you must be going through. My thoughts are with you. When everything else fails, when your whole world crashes about you, all you have left is hope and hope will never fade or diminish, it will always be there.

You have so many people praying for you, thinking of you that if the power of thought alone could make a difference, your little boy would be home in your arms. Draw strength though, from our thoughts and know that you are not facing this alone.


Trazzletoes Thu 04-Oct-12 13:42:17

Thanks all. We are still waiting for the GA and MRI. DS is starving. He's on a drip now as he's dehydrated. He is on the emergency list for the MRI today so there's now a reasonable chance that it won't go ahead. He is definitely on the list to have his biopsy and bone marrow sample tomorrow and have a line put in for chemotherapy.

I love him so much.

Thanks so much for all your support. There are so many of you spread all over, I keep picturing one of those photos of the UK at night with the little bright splodges of light. That's what you are to me. With an extra big splodge for buffy grin

tara0202 Thu 04-Oct-12 13:42:53

Thinking of you and your little boy today. I looked at his picture, he's so cute. One hour at a time. X

InfinityWelcomesCarefulDrivers Thu 04-Oct-12 13:45:16

So he's starved all day and yet it might not go ahead sad poor little thing.

Thumbwitch Thu 04-Oct-12 13:49:22

Oh no, so sorry that it hasn't gone as planned today - if only they'd decide it's not going to happen, he could have something to eat! Poor boy.

If it helps your splodge picture, mine is in NSW Australia, just above Sydney. smile

Kittenkatzen Thu 04-Oct-12 13:58:56

Oh the poor hungry little man sad He is absolutely gorgeous by the way!

Sending love and healing thoughts to you and your boy x

FriggFRIGG Thu 04-Oct-12 14:00:35

Another here -in Hampshire- thinking of &#375;ou and your boy.
And hoping for the best possible outcome.x

Another splodge from Hampshire here.

Ginshizz Thu 04-Oct-12 14:07:25

Thinking of you and your lovely little man. My DD and I are sending hugs to you both xxxxxx

madwomanintheattic Thu 04-Oct-12 14:22:52

You need a bigger map. There are splodges of light all over the world, including one casting a fetching glow onto the snow in Canada x
Sending speedy vibes for MRI. Waiting is torture. <squeeze>

huge burning bright light for you here

LookBehindYou Thu 04-Oct-12 14:32:31

Such a beautiful boy.
Thinking of you all.

WheresMyCow Thu 04-Oct-12 14:37:01

Just checking in to send holding hands and hugs to Yorkshire smile

Hope that your gorgeous DS gets something good to eat soon xx

Just popping in Trazzles to say hi today, hope your DS has something nice to eat soon, love to you all xx

I don't know what to say. You're such a brave woman and he is clearly a lovely, lovely child. All my biggest best hopes that this will come right for you.

wantingmore Thu 04-Oct-12 14:56:13

So sorry for what you and your family are going through. Love and hugs to you all.xx

dutchwifey Thu 04-Oct-12 15:23:14

Have just seen this thread. I'm so terribly sorry that you are all going through this. Will be thinking of u (from the Netherlands) xxx

Poosnu Thu 04-Oct-12 15:40:01

Trazzle, I'm so sorry for you all and for your beautiful DS. I didn't want to read and run. My cousin's DD was diagnosed with neurobastoma when she was around 2. She's now 7 and such a happy little girl. I'm thinking of you.x

PollyLogos Thu 04-Oct-12 15:50:26

Sending best wishes and a big splodge of light from Greece. Thinking of you all and hoping that positive news comes your way soon. x

HazzleMcDazzle Thu 04-Oct-12 15:53:35

Thinking of you, and sending you and your family a splodge of light from deepest Essex. xx

alisonsmum Thu 04-Oct-12 15:54:29

just wanted to say im thinking of your family, sending my love and support xxx

AnAssumedIdentity Thu 04-Oct-12 15:56:22

Sending you all so much love and hand holding from Brussels.

drjohnsonscat Thu 04-Oct-12 15:56:56

oh your poor baby. So sorry about this horrible news Trazzle. I have no experience but am avidly reading other posts from people who've been there and got through so I hope that gives you something to hold on to. I can only offer a hand hold and a listening ear.

thinking of you and your little boy.

TanteRose Thu 04-Oct-12 15:59:39

My splodge of light is just south of Tokyo - take care x

ratbagcatbag Thu 04-Oct-12 16:00:44

Take care of yourself, you sound an amazing mum, massive hugs and prayers to your family xx

D0G Thu 04-Oct-12 16:01:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Annunziata Thu 04-Oct-12 16:01:36

A splodge of light and prayers from Glasgow.

THERhubarb Thu 04-Oct-12 16:03:05

Oh, I think you know where I am, but just in case, please put a light in North Wiltshire.

Crossandratty Thu 04-Oct-12 16:03:57

A big Splodge of light from Cambridge. I'm holding your hand too x

clippityclop Thu 04-Oct-12 16:07:35

So sorry, love and light shining your way from the middle of the Irish sea. xx

Thelobsterswife Thu 04-Oct-12 16:08:32

Just wanted to add my support for you and your family. Xx

Splodge of light from South Yorkshire. So sorry you and your DS are going through this.

happierhigherstrongerwheezing Thu 04-Oct-12 16:11:04

sending you best wishes and lots of love and hugs

There is a little boy near me, who has neuroblastoma one of twins.
Harvey Hext, if you google it.
The recovery rate from this is very good,please don't despair just because it is the c word.

Doctors are wonderful. thinking of you.

thewhistler Thu 04-Oct-12 16:14:35

Light in London for you.

Abra1d Thu 04-Oct-12 16:14:52

I am so sorry to hear this, trazzle. Thinking of you all.

hellymelly Thu 04-Oct-12 16:15:26

Little light splodge from the far west of Wales, near the sea. Maybe I could see clippity's light from here.

((Trazzle)) Sending you all the positive vibes in the world for you and your gorgeous boy x

TheCountessOlenska Thu 04-Oct-12 16:18:33

Thinking of you and your family xx

me23 Thu 04-Oct-12 16:22:02

I am so sorry you are going through this x

OrangeandGoldMrsDeVere Thu 04-Oct-12 16:22:27

I am so sorry you are facing this Trazzle.
So very sorry for you little lad.
He sounds adorable.

Cadmum Thu 04-Oct-12 16:41:18

Please enlarge your light map to include a far off splodge from rainy Bangkok, Thailand. If support and warm wishes were enough, your sweet little man would be healed.

I hope today goes smoothly and ends with some reassuring news.

Cadmum Thu 04-Oct-12 16:41:21

Please enlarge your light map to include a far off splodge from rainy Bangkok, Thailand. If support and warm wishes were enough, your sweet little man would be healed.

I hope today goes smoothly and ends with some reassuring news.