9 year old really tearful all the time

[anklemcankle]

I can't think of any reason for it. He just bursts into tears at nothing! The last few weeks!
He did complain of a headache for a few days but other than that seems ok apart from the constant tears.

I have tried asking him why and have spoken to the school but we are all at a loss

[ManonCrempog]

My 10-y-o gets like this sometimes- it's horrible to witness isn't it OP. It happens when he's run down (he was like it last week after a heavy cold) and at the end of term. It's also affected by his eating habits- he gets very down if he's gone a while without food, and doesn't realise he was hungry until after he's eaten.
I kept mine off school for a day last week, let him sleep late and rest, and he awoke the next 100% fine.

[anklemcankle]

Yes it is upsetting. It's like he is just totally overwhelmed by everything. Ask him to get up he cries, ask him to get dressed he cries and it goes on and on. I have tried getting him to get more sleep as he does look pale but that hasn't helped.

[anklemcankle]

He eats pretty well but he is really thin! I don't actually know his weight but he is boney

[EllaHen]

I remember whenever I was tearful for no reason, my Mum would say 'you are feeling a bit emotional' and give me a big cuddle.

Every now and then my DD gets tearful and I do the same as my Mum did for me.

Life is overwhelming, it's important to be kind.

[Chrysanthemum5]

DS is 11 and can be tearful. I'll just give him a hug and tell him it's hard being 11- his body is changing, his mind is changing. It seems to make him feel better and he will calm down and tell me what's bothering him.

You have my sympathy though - it's hard for the parents as well

[redcaryellowcar]

Is it worth checking his diet, maybe iron is low?
Do you think something is going on that he can't tell you? Bullying, etc? Have you spoken, confidentially, to his school?
I totally agree that plenty of hugs is a good first step.
I think life is tough for children, pressure is on for them with SATs etc and I imagine some deal with the pressure better than others.
Do hope you get to the bottom of this soon. It must be very worrying.

[Mishaps]

It is very common for children of this age to suddenly recognise their mortality - I know one 9 year old who told his Mum he wished that he had never been born so he would not have to die.

Or - there may be bullying at school or friendship problems. So many things.

It is very hard to get a boy of that age to open up. Just give him a hug and let him tell you in his own time.

This must be such a worry for you. He just needs to know that you are there for him.

[anklemcankle]

He's only just turned 9 so in year 4. I know he has friends etc at school - he doesn't really like the work but it doesn't seem to be what upsets him.

I did make an appointment with his teacher a few weeks ago, she said she had noticed the same type of thing although he does generally hold off the tears at school . She described it as a downward attitude / lack of energy.

I do try to hug him loads, he is the only boy and has 5 sisters so he does get spoiled a little but he has always been a lovely little thing.

I'm trying to think how many hours of tears there have been today it must be at least 30 - there were 8 I can't remember clearly from before breakfast time

And he hasn't been In trouble nothing bad has happened. One episode for example was because he was sitting on top of his sisters charging cable so she (nicely) asked him to sit up a minute so she could pull it out !

[anklemcankle]

That should be bouts of tears not hours. 30 hours would be amazing

[Haudyerwheesht]

My not long 9 year old boy is the same. It's horrible but it seems to be quite 'normal' amongst his peers. I try and just be there for him really and try not to get annoyed at what sometimes seems like hysterics / spoilt behaviour.

Also I never let go first if we're having a cuddle.

[Mishaps]

"downward attitude / lack of energy." - well she is a dear sensitive soul. I would not be happy if a teacher said that when my DS is suffering.

I do hope that you get to the bottom of this and can help him in some way. Of course the more you try to get him to open up the more he will clam up. Just the hugs I think. Good luck with this.

[afromom]

DS was like this at 9/10. I read somewhere that they have a surge of hormones at this age and I put it down to that.

[WeAllHaveWings]

With my ds tearfulness is always related to lack of sleep which I think coincided with growth spurts. At that age he generally needed a good 10 hours sleep which meant in bed reading for 8:30 lights out at 9, he'd be asleep by 9:30 and awake at 7:30. And it had to be consistent, too many late nights at weekends and the tears would start again.