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Is it normal for 7 year olds to begin to worry a lot?

(8 Posts)
Angelfootprints Wed 23-Jan-13 23:56:32

My dc aged 7 has turned into a real worrier. They used to be very easy going

They worry about morbid things like me or dh dying ,or another example is that they aren't loved.

They say they gets a worried thought and it wont go away- though they do seem to easily forget if a cartoon comes on TV/ we make a joke/ friend knocks for to play.

Is it normal to get worries like this so young?

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Thu 24-Jan-13 00:16:25

My friend's son had a phase of asking very disturbing questions and dwelling on not macabre but yes, morbid things around the same age. She didn't ever find out if one specific thing triggered it but she answered his questions thoughtfully and if she wasn't sure, told him so and tried to find out. (Not a bad tactic to play for time occasonally, anyway). It could be a bit unnerving but she tried to regard it as him having an enquiring mind. He seemed satrisfied with her taking him seriously whereas ruffling hair and saying jovially, "What do you want to know a grisly thing like that for?" only seemed to upset or annoy him.

Perhaps the underlying motive was extra reassurance. He's 11 now and seems perfectly content.

Angelfootprints Thu 24-Jan-13 00:20:40

Thank you Donkey. I do think they have got worse ever since they witnessed incident involving their baby sister choking and coughing up blood. She was fine in the end, but at the time It was awful.

I do wonder if this has triggered life and death thoughts more?

rockinhippy Thu 24-Jan-13 00:30:05

THIS BOOK

was a big help to my Dd when she went through this at a similar age - I do think in part its very normal & down to them becoming more aware, but of course witnessing or going through anything bad will make it a bit worse.

The book is for the DCs & has lots of exercises for them to do in a kiddy self help sort of way, draw their worry monster, name it, tell it off etc - my DD loved it & she definitely took it on board & it helped

Angelfootprints Thu 24-Jan-13 00:38:21

Thank you rockinhippy, I have ordered the book.

Did you ever take dd to the doctor?

rockinhippy Thu 24-Jan-13 00:54:33

No, my DD did see the School counsellor for a while though as there was some things going on at school she was struggling with & like yours she witnessed things there that upset her a lot.

That might be a better route for you, its much quicker than anything the GP can do & it doesn't have to be about school stuff, its open to all DCs who are struggling with anything such as you describe or family issues - its play based counselling & DD loved it, though it was decided she was pretty normal, felt very secure & generally happy & was coping well smile

I should add though that a few years down the line (now 10) shes just been diagnosed with Hypermobility Syndrome - basically a collagen defect making her extra bendy & accident prone due to lax joints, stomach problems, exhaustion, aches & pains (originally passed off as growing pains) - & anxiety is actually a symptom of that, so I can now see that when she feels ill, tired etc, she becomes jumpy & anxious again - though thankfully it doesn't last long - its very unlikely this is your DCS problem, but worth baring in mind if anything else shows up over the coming years

Angelfootprints Thu 24-Jan-13 01:07:58

Thank you Rockin, though there isn't a school counsellor at dc school its very small. Can I get a referral to one outside if needs be?

rockinhippy Thu 24-Jan-13 01:20:41

Here it's a service that's shared by several schools, like the school nurse she travels around schools from a central office, so you might well find it's the same where you are too, definitely worth asking at the school - good luck

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