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Sorry me again - parents late AGAIN

(39 Posts)
SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 17:34:40

Another issue! Lateness

Neither mum or dad seem to be able to get their backsides in gear and get home on time.

The lateness can range from 3 mins to 35mins. It's happening daily now. I very rarely get a phone call or text to say they'll be late - always me ringing 5/10 mins after finish time.

I've spoken to then repeatedly about it and nothing changes

Runoutofideas Wed 24-Apr-13 17:40:35

I have just started issuing late fees of £15 for each 15 minutes - just for one persistently late parent. It worked the first week, she was actually 5 mins early, but the second week she was 13 minutes late so will get the fee added onto her next bill. Don't know whether it'll make any difference to the lateness but at least I will make good money out of it! Lateness at the end of the day is seriously disruptive to my own children's bath/bed routine, so I made the charges suitably high to avoid people just choosing to be late and pay a bit extra.

Runoutofideas Wed 24-Apr-13 17:41:36

Ah - are you a nanny? If so what I said obviously doesn't apply. Maybe say "I'll be 10 mins late in the morning to make up for last night" and see how well that goes down!

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 17:43:25

Yeh am a nanny - Good idea about stating ill be late

nanny87 Wed 24-Apr-13 18:21:07

If I was you I would have another chat and just like nurseries/cm do start issuing a late fine and write it all down so its recorded how late they are. I'm a nanny myself and understand it can be a bit of give and take if there's problems with the tube traffics etc but if its a regular occurance I would def start asking for a late fee.

AndBingoWasHisNameOh Wed 24-Apr-13 18:36:18

Nannies can't start issuing late "fines" - it simply isn't that kind of relationship! You should however discuss with them the situation and make clear that you are unhappy and feel unappreciated. You should consider what you want - is it that you don't want to work any later per se or that you want paying for it, in which case query if they should adjust the contractual hours. Would you like time off in lieu?

It is possible however that nothing will sink in so I'd start thinking about whether you'd look to move if this keeps happening.

wiltingfast Wed 24-Apr-13 18:40:34

Hmm, if you want a 9 to 5 job maybe you should go get one? hmm

nanny87 Wed 24-Apr-13 18:41:26

But surely if she discussed on many occasions that their lateness isn't on and their clearly not bothered and still coming back late then surely having another discussion isn't going to work.

Wilting it is not unreasonable to expect to finish work on time. When I worked late at my last job I took time in leu. The parents are rude to expect the OP to put their life on hold because they are disorganised.

notapoloshirtperson Wed 24-Apr-13 19:04:42

Perhaps suggest that as your current finish time is difficult for them, and it must be stressful for them rushing back every evening, you are happy to increase your hours. So if you are supposed to finish at 6pm suggest a finish of 6.30pm instead and see how that goes.

Gigondas Wed 24-Apr-13 19:08:05

This job really isn't working is it? Aside from stating that being late and no warning isn't on, I am not sure what can do. They seem to take the piss every which way.

nannynick Wed 24-Apr-13 19:41:31

Increasing the hours so that there is more of a gap between one of them typically arriving home and you leaving is the way to resolve. However would they do that?
If you look at hours over a 1 week period, are you doing contracted hours, less/more?

Is this the only issue, or just one of many?

To cope with it mentally, could you think that the working hours are 30 minutes more each day than they are, so in your mind they are getting home early. May be a way to get through the next few days whilst you get the chance to discuss with them about changing the contractual hours.

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 19:43:01

Don't get what you mean by 9-5 job - I don't mind working til the time I finish but don't appreciate being used as 'free' childcare because they can't get there backsides into gear.

I've suggested extending hours but was a big no no and even if they did extend I'm pretty sure they wouldn't be back by that time - as when I've worked agreed overtime they couldn't get back on time

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 19:45:43

Nanny nick - there are quite a few issues and I'm looking for a new job.

On an average week my contracted hours are 50. I reckon I'm working about 2 hours over each week - which seems to be free

nannynick Wed 24-Apr-13 19:50:06

Feel sorry for you but also the children, they may end up going through a lot of nannies.

roundtoit Wed 24-Apr-13 19:54:27

start to keep a diary with all your times in and at the end of the month give them a copy, with the extra times underlined. good luck with the new job hunt.

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 19:55:16

I've decided to leave speaking to them again until payday and then say that my wages seem low for all the overtime I've done

AndBingoWasHisNameOh Wed 24-Apr-13 20:08:01

Isn't that a bit passive aggressive?

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Wed 24-Apr-13 20:09:09

What do you mean? My pay will be short by about 6-8 hours

AndBingoWasHisNameOh Wed 24-Apr-13 20:17:03

Presumably they're not intending to pay you overtime here. So wouldn't it be better to face it up front and discuss prior to pay day and say you assume that you'll be paid overtime for the extra and you've done some calculations for their convenience as to what the extra is.

What you're proposing is to wait until what you know won't happen then doesn't happen and then make our you assumed it would be happening. This is what I think is the PA bit.

Gigondas Wed 24-Apr-13 20:20:54

Agree with andbingo- otherwise it's not just pa but you will have zero chance of pay

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 24-Apr-13 20:28:52

wilting,everyone wants to finish on their contracted hours, esp nannies who have often done a 10-12hr day anyway - op doesnt want a 9-5 job, she happy doing say 8-7 (for example) but isnt happy with parents coming in at 7.30pm most nights

its rude of your employers and shows how little respect they have for you sad

i would sit down with them and say you have noticed they are always late and past your contracted hours

suggest they extend your finishing time by 30mins and adjust pay

tbh i dont think they will change, there are many aspects of this job that take the piss and the quicker you find a new job the better

but sometimes its not that easy to find a job thats good, no point in just taking a job for the hell of it

good luck x

mindingalongtime Thu 25-Apr-13 09:25:14

When the family I nannied for kept doing it, at least 30 minutes everyday, I just added it to the invoice at the end of the month for expenses. When MB queried it, I said, well the dad is late every night ( the MB worked away, didn't know it was happening) and that the time is adding up over a month to some extra 10 hours a month, either I could invoice each month or we could renegotiate our contract.

The lateness stopped immediately and never happened again!

5alive4life Thu 25-Apr-13 09:54:04

whenever mum works away i just know I will get a phonecall about 10 min before end time that dad is running late,happens everytime. I had a chat with them about it and it soon stopped!

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Thu 25-Apr-13 13:21:16

I've had numerous chats, I've tried saying I have to be somewhere 15-20mins after i finish but nothing works

Gigondas Thu 25-Apr-13 13:23:05

Well the real answer is new job but I know that's easier said than done. I am so sorry for nannies when employers like yours Take the piss.

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Thu 25-Apr-13 14:07:53

Am job hunting already.

Had a text 10mins ago - mboss stated that I had to work 2 hours overtime as she needs to work late. I refused as have plans and she got well arsy

Gigondas Thu 25-Apr-13 14:10:02

Was she going to pay you for this? And where is db?

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Thu 25-Apr-13 14:12:06

Db is going to the gym and for a pint
Pay wasn't mentioned. I'm not doing it

Gigondas Thu 25-Apr-13 14:18:35

That's completely fair enough. The issue is she will of course not come back leaving you with kids.

Can you resign and temp?

nannynick Thu 25-Apr-13 14:21:38

2 hours overtime at last minute, they are kidding. Sure if you did not have plans, were not messed about so much, you would be willing to do it. But you have plans, so keep insisting that one of them gets home by the time you need to leave.

Most employers would not make such a request unless it was an emergency... like them calling from the train which has sat at a station for over an hour due to a problem on the line.

DB needs to play his part, cancelling his gym plan seems the sensible thing to do. Or maybe he could take the kids to the club for an evening swim.

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Thu 25-Apr-13 14:26:23

Thanks Nannynick - I told her basically what you said and she wasn't happy.
I'm out that door at finish time and if I have to take the kids to her work so be it

AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate Thu 25-Apr-13 18:56:37

I am always shocked the way some people treat nannies. When I had one I did, far more frequently than I would have liked, tear through the door with a couple of minutes to go to the end of official hours, but I tried to balance it with days I got back 15 minutes early and she left early. I was only ever actually late a handful of times, and always because the tube was down and I got stranded somewhere. And I was massively apologetic about it.

Seb101 Thu 25-Apr-13 19:31:38

What happened??? Did mb or db come home on time? You didn't take the kids to her work did you ��! I wouldn't have the nerve to do that! Fair play if you did though. Imagine the mums face if you walked in and deposited her kids at her desk, he he! Hope you managed to get away. It must be incredibly frustrating working for people like that. X

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Thu 25-Apr-13 19:41:15

I was just about to pull of the driveway when she arrived -seemed pretty shocked I was going to take them to her work

SaveWaterDrinkMalibu Fri 26-Apr-13 09:14:16

This morning was very awkward!

iluvkids Fri 26-Apr-13 10:09:13

At least they know you mean business now

Gigondas Fri 26-Apr-13 10:14:55

Good for you for being assertive . Also as a Mb can I say nothing you post is unreasonable , so please don't think that or that all employers like this. Some of the post from nannies make me angrysadblush for employers.

iluvkids Fri 26-Apr-13 10:34:22

Im working for FAB employers at the mo ... They are out there :-)

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