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Babysitter refused to bath the children at bed time - is this standard?

(78 Posts)

Babysitter we have had several times before (from an agency) said she had checked and she wasn't allowed to give the children their bath at bed time.

Children are 2 and 4. Was I being unreasonable to expect this?

We were going out just before 6, so arranged for babysitter to arrive at 5:30 so we could all finish the kids tea together, then hand them over for the usual bath and bed time routine.

Anyone else have experience of the bath question?

I don't think you should expect a stranger to bath your children at all, at least not one they hardly knew - quite different if it was a nanny.

BackforGood Sun 17-Feb-13 12:52:03

I wouldn't expect a babysitter to bath children - nor (when I've babysat) have I ever been asked to. You either bath them really early, or let them go without a bath for that day.

HeyHoHereWeGo Sun 17-Feb-13 12:56:51

I always tell them not to bathe them as 1)they might not actually really and truly get that you cannot leave them alone for a nanosecond and 2)it feels too intimate for a stranger to do with my children.

forevergreek Sun 17-Feb-13 12:57:08

i dont think so. a nanny yes, they care for all your childrens needs day and night, a babysitter usually comes after they are in bed or just lets them watch tv then put to bed.

in your case i would arrange for them to arrive at 5.50pm. both children would have had dinner by 5pm that day and already bathed/in pjs.

LittleChimneyDroppings Sun 17-Feb-13 13:00:46

I wouldn't expect a complete stranger to bath my children. It would be different if it was a nanny who worked with your children all the time. But a stranger from a babysitting agency? Absolutely not.

12ylnon Sun 17-Feb-13 13:04:06

I think this is a sensible precaution for a babysitter to take.

I have my own children, but have never been asked to bath a child i was sitting and i don't think i would do it unless i knew the parent and child very well (i have 1 client who i might consider doing it for if she asked).

Whilst i imagine you would never have to raise an allegation, but there are some parents who would, so the sitter is just covering herself.

It sounds sensible to me.

Kaekae Sun 17-Feb-13 13:07:41

I would not even consider asking them, would not feel comfortable with someone from an agency bathing them at all.

MyHeadWasInTheSandNowNot Sun 17-Feb-13 13:08:13

I presume that all of you saying it's too intimate had children who never went to nursery and were out of nappies by 2? hmm

I can see why the agency have said that - it reduces the risk of complaints/allegations.

It's a sad state of affairs though sad

With small children it's often part of their bedtime routine and they are happier when that stays the same.

I guess they'll have to miss their bath this time and you'll have to get them in their PJ's before you go out.

Maybe look for a local babysitter who you can develop a relationship with instead of using the agency.

MoppingMummy Sun 17-Feb-13 13:08:35

Of course I wouldn't think it was reasonable to leave my children to be bathed by an almost complete stranger.

My children don't have a bath every night anyway, and in this circumstance we would definitely miss it out of bedtime routine.

Viviennemary Sun 17-Feb-13 13:13:22

I've not used an agency for babysitting. But I've never heard of a babysitter being asked to bath the children. Even when they know them quite well never mind somebody they hardly know. Most small children would be either in bed or in pyjamas. But if the parents are going out early this might be difficult. But I wouldn't have thought bathing children was normally part of babysitting duties.

Interesting... Thanks for your views. I had no idea it was such a weird request.

We've had her maybe four times before so not a 'complete' stranger. The kids get on with her well and were looking forward to seeing her.

I appreciate the general opinion being expressed here, but I genuinely can't help feeling a niggle that, on the one hand I am not supposed to be comfortable with this person bathing my kids, but on the other hand I am supposed to be comfortable with leaving her responsible for them for the night, changing nappies, helping them go to the loo, comfort them if they wake up, etc?

What is different about the bath? Genuine question - it has simply never occurred to me that there should be any taboo or weirdness around this, and I feel a bit sad that everyone else seems to think there is. But in this case it sounds like I am the strange one!

tethersend Sun 17-Feb-13 13:14:26

It's more than likely a blanket agency rule to protect their staff from allegations.

12ylnon Sun 17-Feb-13 13:19:03

Thats a good question- you should totally trust the person who's babysitting your child. I suppose just because the child is naked. There is quite a lot of touching involved (getting them in and out, drying off, getting them dressed etc). Really, it isn't much different to changing a nappy or getting them into jammies, but there we go. Funny world ay!

I agree with what one poster said about getting someone who's not from an agency and building a relationship with them, seeing as it's something that the agency in particular has stipulated.

MyHeadWasInTheSandNowNot Sun 17-Feb-13 13:20:44

Fanny - it isn't a weird request. Babysitting for small children from 5.30pm often includes bathtime, in the real world, only on MN is it weird/asking for trouble/not done blah blah blah.

What you say is right - there isn't any difference, either you trust her or you don't.

It is different if they are older and if they would be uncomfortable, but kids this age just want to play in the bath, they really don't give a toss who is making sure they're safe when doing so!

You aren't strange - not at all - prefectly normal. It's MN that has a weird vibe sometimes.

JugglingChaotically Sun 17-Feb-13 13:22:22

I'm with the others and would ask our family or nanny to do bath but that's it really. I've done early bath and then early tea in pjs followed by short film - "special treat" in the circs. (And yes, pjs had to be changed sometimes!! But it skips over the bath problem!).
Otherwise skipped bath but got hem into pjs before i left and then normal routine.

Lonecatwithkitten Sun 17-Feb-13 13:27:19

I always assumed that when having a babysitter you presented the children ready for bed and the most the babysitter had to do was read a story.
I just never saw supervising the bath as being part of the babysitters role.

BackforGood Sun 17-Feb-13 14:05:06

I agree with LoneCat - it's nothing to do with 'seeing them naked' or 'touching them when you dry them' for me, it's about making life easier for the babysitter.
I was babysitting last night for my nephews, so not a stranger by any means, but they were all ready in PJs when I got there, and my role (well, it was dd's really, I just sat and read a book) was to play/read with them for a few minutes, then tuck them up in bed. A lovely, easy evening, and I'd be very happy to go again next week, and the week after, etc. Doing baths however moves it into a whole different ball game, just as it would if I were asked to cook for them or other non-intimate jobs. I still would do it occasionally to help SiL and BiL out, but it would be much more of a chore. I know OP is paying an agency, so slightly differnt from my free service, but, same principal applies - what's it worth doing / how much work am I prepared to do, for this amount of pay. A lot of people use babysitting as a chance to sit and study once the children are tucked up.
It is the difference between a babysitter (pocket money job) and a Nanny (full time profession) I'd say.

Startail Sun 17-Feb-13 14:23:52

I've never bathed my DDs every night and I certainly wouldn't expect a baby sitter to.

Karoleann Sun 17-Feb-13 14:27:18

I've never asked an agency sitter (we usually use sitters) to bathe the children, although if I'd asked one to sit that early, I would expect them to finish tea and then play and read books and maybe get their pyjamas on. If it was after 6, I'd make sure the children were dressed and ready for bed.

We do have a regular babysitter and she will do bathtime, but she nannies for us during the day too, so she's more used to the children and where stuff is etc.

FlouncingMintyy Sun 17-Feb-13 14:29:17

My dc miss their evening bath/shower when we have a babysitter. Its no biggie.

I am learning so much here! You see, if it weren't for Mumsnet, how would any of us know any of this stuff?

Or is just me who thinks everyone else knows stuff, and I have no idea how it is that they know it and I don't? grin

akaemmafrost Sun 17-Feb-13 14:35:04

I did extensive babysitting in my teens and early twenties and was never asked to bath kids. It has nothing to do with inappropriate behaviour it's just not done.

Floralnomad Sun 17-Feb-13 14:36:06

I agree with lonecat , the clue is in the title ,babysitter . They come , they play ,they read , children wake up they deal with them . Perhaps it is slightly different if they're from an agency but you wouldn't ask a friend / friends teenage children to bath your kids would you .

Having both been a babysitter myself as a teenager and student, and having had a babysitter for ours - usually the same young friend (20's) we know well - I think part of it is surely just trying to make things as simple and easy for the babysitter as possible. So, I'd definitely just miss the baths out that night, but mine don't have one every day anyway. You could suggest continuing with a bedtime story I guess if you usually do that too ?

smilingthroughgrittedteeth Sun 17-Feb-13 14:46:13

I'm a nanny and often babysit for families.

I bath my charges when working and would if babysitting.

I bath a little boy I regularly babysit for because mum hires me more ad a temp nanny than as a babysitter

I've never been asked to bath any other child I've ever babysat for and wouldn't really expect to but it wouldn't bother me if I was asked.

However I charge £10 an hour I think I would feel differently if I was being paid less.

fraktion Sun 17-Feb-13 15:02:06

I've usually supervised bathtime but again I charged a higher rate so it was reasonable from my POV. I don't expect the local teen we sometimes use to do bathtime.

I think it also depends on the age of the child. DS is going through a grubby stage, he needs a bath bit bathing before dinner upsets him for some reason do the choice is go out later or have babysitter do it. We have inbuilt babysitting though....

RedPencils Sun 17-Feb-13 15:13:32

I wouldn't expect a babysitter to give a bath. Not because its inappropriate but because its a big faff. My DCs get into PJs before the sitter arrives and they eat popcorn in front of the telly as a treat.

Agree I would never expect this of a teenager, but I thought the days of using teenagers to babysit were long gone. The agency babysitters are all qualified childcarers, and the local one we mainly use is also a nursery worker for her day job.

I pay £7.50 an hour. Do you think if I was explicit about the bath, and paid more, it would be ok? (Obviously not the agency one if they are not allowed.)

Yes, I think if your children like their night-time bath and you ask the baby-sitter if she can do that as per their normal routine, and you pay a good rate, you should easily be able to find someone happy to baby-sit with bath and bed-time smile
Maybe make sure you're happy with the person first, but as you say that applies anyway really. I think it's great if you can find someone you and the DC's love and then stick with them as your usual baby-sitter. But perhaps we've been lucky !

ReetPetit Sun 17-Feb-13 15:35:04

havent got time to read whole thread but i would never expect an agency babysitter to bathe my kids! not fair on her or your children imo.
aside from all the other issues, shes a babysitter - not a nanny, bathing is not,as far as im aware in a babysitters job description.

MoppingMummy Sun 17-Feb-13 15:36:15

Tbh I wouldn't even leave my 21yr old sister with the big responsibility of bathing my children on her own. I trust her completely, but she doesn't live close & hasn't been here for many bathtimes to be confident enough to do it on her own. I don't think it is an issue so much with the nakedness as water safety etc and just playing it safe.

MoppingMummy Sun 17-Feb-13 15:37:57

and do your children really need a bath every day???

It's no problem, I'll adjust in line with what the thread is saying. It simply never occurred to me to think about changing the kids' routine just because we had a babysitter.

Like I said up thread, without MN, who tells you this stuff? confused

nannynick Sun 17-Feb-13 15:56:54

Why would what the agency says make and difference? The babysitter is not an employee of the agency are they? It would be an agreement between you and the babysitter wouldn't it?

PuppyMonkey Sun 17-Feb-13 15:57:41

Giving kids a bath every night is madness IMHO. Talk about making life unnecessarily awkward for yourself. Routine me arsegrin

cheesesarnie Sun 17-Feb-13 16:00:47

never heard of a babysitter being asked to do bath time.
imo - you get a night off and so do dc! no bath!

SamSmalaidh Sun 17-Feb-13 16:05:31

I think it's a bit much to ask a babysitter to do bath time too - they are not a nanny, they are just there to keep everyone safe and do the minimum really imo. For example, I always leave DS's dinner out ready, pyjamas ready etc and would like his teeth brushed before bed but not too bothered if it doesn't get done!

Children of 2 and 4 don't need to have their bedtime routine adhered to exactly every night (doesn't that make life a bit tricky for you??) so missing an occasional bath is fine.

nooka Sun 17-Feb-13 16:13:36

My children had a bath every night at that age. Just part of their bedtime routine really, and no more hassle than any other part of it. I don't think we ever asked tour babysitter to bath them just because we'd not usually go out until later, generally she'd do bedtime story and settling only.

That's what I recall from my babysitting days too, in fact frequently the children were asleep when I arrived. I don't think it is a strange reuest, just perhaps a bit different from the norm.

OutragedFromLeeds Sun 17-Feb-13 17:06:08

I agree with others that is isn't a case of the babysitter seeing them naked or whatever, it's just not a babysitter's job.

I'm a nanny and my hourly babysitting rate is lower than my hourly work rate. If i'm babysitting I don't expect to do tea or bathtime. I expect them ready for bed when I get there.

If the parents need someone from earlier then they need me to nanny for them, so I charge my normal hourly rate until 7pm and then babysitting rate from then on. In your circumstances OP I would charge normal nanny rates from 5:30-7pm and would be happy to bath them, then babysitting rate from 7pm onwards.

me2011 Sun 17-Feb-13 18:25:00

I work for sitters and I would never accept to do dinner or bath the children I sitt, for the rate I get. I babysat once for a family who asked me to hung their washing while I was telling the child a story. I have never accepted a booking for them.

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 17-Feb-13 18:33:09

as with lonecat - its not the job of a babysitter, esp one who may not know the children that well to bath them - as in some kids hate bathtime and dont want to have necessary tears

personally nothing to do with being naked etc as others have said we change nappies etc

tbh i hate bathtime, its the end of the day kids are tired, as am i sometimes, and although fine to do as a nanny (part of my job) as a babysitter i wouldnt bath and have said no when ive been asked

a friend got to a job at 7.30pm and was asked to bath kids as running late, she assumed they would be in bed and asleep when she got there - she wasnt impressed but bathed them and finally in bed 8.30 - 1 and 3yr

i bs for them a few weeks later and was asked the same thing, seems always run late, or mb hates bathing???

i said no, too late, and i didnt bath and kids went to bed without - was never asked to bath again, yet my friend always is grin

BertieBotts Sun 17-Feb-13 18:33:43

I babysat for a little boy - around 3 maybe? - a couple of times when I was 16 and was asked to give him a bath one of those times.

BertieBotts Sun 17-Feb-13 18:34:27

And it was fine, except that he was a little shy and said he didn't want me to look at his willy. So I promised him I'd only look at his face, and he was happy then.

scottishmummy Sun 17-Feb-13 18:38:14

Hell no agency babysitter woldnt bathe, too risky for them.too intimate

UniS Sun 17-Feb-13 18:47:14

I wouldn't expect a babysitter to bath a child.

I had one baby sitter ( a mature lady) who wouldn't even be in the room when DS got changed in to PJs, she said she would give him his privacy. Not that DS cared one jot about privacy, he was liable to waltz round the house starkers between clothes and PJs, but hey ho, each to their own. These days DS is 6 and we have him already in PJs before baby sitters arrive.

ZuleikaD Sun 17-Feb-13 20:30:33

I have been both agency and non agency babysitter, and hired babysitters myself, and would certainly not expect to bath children as part of it, nor would I ask one to. I've also been an au pair and a nanny and have bathed as part of those roles. It's to do with just how 'in loco parentis' you are, in my view. Babysitters are some way down the scale in terms of what you ask them to be responsible for. As a babysitter I've also never changed a nappy.

Wandastartup Mon 18-Feb-13 20:19:35

I didn't realise it was taboo. Our babysitters often bath my children if we are going out early or if they have collected children from nursery or childminder!

Strix Mon 18-Feb-13 20:35:42

I'd never again hire that babysitter. Of course bedtime routine is part of the job. Does she/he really thing they are supposed to come "sit" and be paid for the priviledge? I don't think so.

And, I would be most unimpressed with the agency who gave that instruction.

Onlyconnect Mon 18-Feb-13 20:45:47

I use babysitters a lot, including when DD is up and awake- i had to do this initially because DP works away and I have to be at work from 5pm to 8pm sometimes and I have no family around. Maybe because of this, I have often asked my babysitters to bath DD and none of them has ever complained. They are not from agencies though. Ihave used agency babysitters when staying in hotels and I am now racking my brains to remember whether I have asked them to bath DD or not. I wouldn't think anything of it so I'm not sure. Certainly none of them has ever complained.

Figgygal Mon 18-Feb-13 20:49:17

Do they need a bath every night?

I wouldnt expect a babysitter to do this, not because of concerns about the bathing itself but just seems unnecessary. I expect the agency say no due to child safety issues.

Mogandme Wed 20-Feb-13 10:44:25

As a nanny if I am staying on after work [5.30] to babysit then I will put in the bath but if I was coming back later anytime after 6.30 then I wouldn't be expected to and MB/DB would have put them in the bath while they were getting ready or just foregone a bath that night.

If I was babysitting for someone I wouldn't expect to bath UNLESS I was asked to come in and do tea/bath/bed and again would charge my nannying fee for the 5-7.30 slot.

I am more than happy to bath children I "know" ie nanny/mum friends children but unknown children I would probably forego the bath - nothing worse than tears/tantrums in the bathtub with a child who doesn't know you

givemeaclue Wed 20-Feb-13 10:48:43

Baby sitters don't bath kids normally "who tells you this stuff"...well the babysitter has told you!

Kids don't need a bath every day. Mine have twice a week.

mirry2 Wed 20-Feb-13 10:54:38

Years ago I used to babysit and was never asked to bath the children. I've never heard of it (or of feeding the child) as part of a babysitter's duties.

RoseMartha Mon 25-Feb-13 22:44:12

I have nannied and babysat and I never bathed children I was babysitting, unless I was working for that family as a nanny at that given time.

MGMidget Tue 26-Feb-13 16:23:42

As the babysitting is starting so early in the evening I don't think its an unreasonable request if a bath is part of their normal routine before bed. However, if this agency have made a rule that it can't be done you'll need to find another agency or a local babysitter you can build a direct relationship with. Some agencies charge a higher daycare rate before a certain time (e.g. before 6pm), does yours? We use Sitters and they do this. If so I would say they are assuming that more work is involved earlier in the day rather than just babysitting. Generally when it is a one-off babysitter I wouldn't ask them to do the bath but if I got someone for daytime hours as well as the evening I wouldn't consider it unreasonable to ask them to do the normal routine stuff that is done in those hours. If they refused to do the bath though I wouldn't worry about it for one night - more of a nice-to-have than an essential.

jennybeadle Tue 26-Feb-13 16:35:07

I'm really shock at this thread. I would always expect a babysitter to do the full bath/bed routine. Do you all expect your DCs to go without a story at bedtime too? I've never, ever come across a babysitter who wouldn't/couldn't do the whole lot, and if I did, they wouldn't be back!

That said, I've always paid £8 - £10 an hour plus a bit extra. Job description doesn't come in to it, it's looking after the children in my stead. If you're doing it from 5.30, then there's no way they'd be in their PJs yet.

Same would go if I were to do it for a friend for free though. I'd expect to do everything they'd normally do at that time. So not completely about the money. In fact ALL about the children.

Would never expect a baby sitter who was not family to bath my children. I used to baby sit my cousin so would bath her but wouldn't be keen on bathing "a stangers" child myself.

UniS Tue 26-Feb-13 21:14:18

jennyB- guess you don't go out much then? 10 ukp an hour for a baby sitter! Add the cost of cinema tickets and a meal and do you get any change from £100? Even the "nature granny" who babysits round here only asks for 5 an hour, the teenagers will sit for 10-15 for an evening. They will all read stories, but I don't expect bathing.

Bathing, IMHO, is in the remit of a nanny, or maybe an overnight childminder.

I babysit for sitters and have only ever been asked to bathe children once. They are usually in pyjamas or old enough to eat into pyjamas themselves. I would happily bathe a 2 and 4 year old. If you want them bathed and the babysitter doesn't want to then find another babysitter. I totally agree that if you're happy to leave them with a person you should be happy for them to bathe your children. I'm a childminder and change nappies every day, don't even think about it. Having said that I think I'm quite relaxed about nakedness and was shocked today at the reaction of the 9, 8 and 5 year olds I was minding when I left 2yo ds2 without his pants while I got a dry pair as he didn't quite make it to the toilet!

I do agree its more work and babysitting for me is pretty low paid when you add travel costs and time into the equation. I much prefer babysitting jobs where the children are in bed and all I do is watch tv grin

GW297 Thu 28-Feb-13 23:05:09

I also babysit extensively and am often asked to bathe the children. Maybe it's because I'm older and I too charge up to ten pounds per hour.

gaelicsheep Thu 28-Feb-13 23:10:22

OK this is totally random I know, but we have never once in 6 years had a babysitter. I don't like to ask a friend, parents live miles away, not keen on using some local kid and I had no idea there was such a thing as a professional babysitter. Are these around everywhere or only the town and cities? How do I find one please? <nervous twitch>

GW297 Thu 28-Feb-13 23:17:36

Word of mouth. Ask your friends for the contact details of their babysitters. So long as you don't go out loads, I'm sure they will be happy to do this for you.

gaelicsheep Thu 28-Feb-13 23:19:45

I think I might live in a slightly different world... but thanks I can try I suppose.

Sitters are nationwide, sitters.co.uk. You pay a quarterly fee I believe and then a booking fee and pay babysitter directly. You book and the most local babysitters get a text and the first to reply will get your booking unless you specifically request a babysitter and then they get first refusal. In my area (Suffolk) hourly rate is £6.20. Babysitters have to have worked with children for 2 years, provide 2 references, have crb check and be first aid qualified and I had an interview including questions about looking after children.

Blondeshavemorefun Thu 28-Feb-13 23:42:50

I don't think money issue comes into it. I charge £10ph and get asked to babysit tons and apart from the family I mentioned before (and I refuse to bath young children late at night) or my perm family - then I don't bath when I babysit

Babysitting is generally either the children are in bed already - or are ready for bed - ie in pj's

Has been the odd one or two that aren't ready but the parents wouldn't expect me to bath - they just miss it for that night

Course I read stories / or make them up if need be smile

Sommink Fri 01-Mar-13 00:03:16

I would never ask a babysitter to bath, I'd be more concerned about my 2 and 4 year old potentially drowning or getting scalded if they were left alone/played with hot tap. I feel its to much responsibility to place on the sitter (especially teenagers) if they are not used to your children.

This doesn't mean I wouldn't trust them looking after my child or seeing them naked, I just get overly concerned where water is involved.

GW297 Fri 01-Mar-13 00:52:49

What about if you did a whole weekend of babysitting? Or you took children to their swimming lesson and had to supervise their shower afterwards? I would never think to say no to the families I babysit for if they asked me to supervise bath time. I just get on with it in the same way I do collection from activities, reading books, oversee piano playing, homework, bedtime stories...

GW297 Fri 01-Mar-13 00:53:42

I can see why you may not ask a teenager though.

gaelicsheep Fri 01-Mar-13 00:55:18

I really think I'm in a different world. Aside from the fact that sitters.co.uk are clearly NOT nationwide (and require me to sign up to find out exactly how far away the "nearest" sitters are) I would, on reflection, never dream of using someone randomly found from an agency to look after my children. And who would leave their children with a babysitter for a whole weekend?

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 01-Mar-13 03:32:41

I often work weekends (for nice families that appreciate me)

Can be for various reasons

Parents need to work
Parents ill/had operation so can't look after children
Parents at child free wedding

Or god forbid a parent actually wanting to go away with their partner and have some 'me' child free time

Parents having a dirty weekend away grin

Plus have done 7/10days and parents gone on holiday without their children shock wink

If you have no gp's near or Friends etc then you come to rely on a nanny / weekend person

Obv you wouldn't just leave your children for days on end at the beginning - well some parents have smile but you get to know and trust the nanny

GW297 Fri 01-Mar-13 06:57:28

Blondeshavemorefun - so do I! Lots of overnights and weekends for families with no grandparents to ask. Mainly for couples enjoying some time away together without their children.

FamiliesShareGerms Fri 01-Mar-13 07:33:42

I think of a babysitter as literally someone to keep an eye on the kids, givevthem supper, settle them into bed, check they're ok. I'd never expect them to bathe them - or give them a proper meal, or supervise their homework or any of those parental jobs that a nanny would do.

£9-10 is the going rate for a babysitter round here too (one reason for using them for a short period when the kids are pretty much in bed anyway!)

Sommink Fri 01-Mar-13 12:50:58

If I was going away for a weekend I would only ever ask family to babysit. However I wouldn't go on holiday without my dd. I had her, she is my responsibility and leaving her for a weekend is not something I consider doing.

A shower at a leisure centre is slightly different 1) the temperature is set and it would not be able to scald a child and 2) it is not pooled water in a shower it drains away

GW297 Fri 01-Mar-13 14:07:04

You are lucky you have family to ask - not everyone does! If anything the children complain that I make their baths too tepid and shallow!

This thread has really got me thinking. I've never thought of being asked to do bath and hair wash as any different to hearing children read or supervising homework or piano etc essentially. I always try to accommodate the family's requirements (unless obviously it is being asked to do something like pick them up from an activity in the car without their booster seat etc.) I know the families really well and I know they trust me and my judgement (what to do if they suddenly feel unwell/have a nightmare etc) completely.

pauline6703 Fri 01-Mar-13 14:32:10

If I am paying a baby sitter I expect her, or him, to work for the money. If my children need a bath then I'm paying for that to be done.
If I employ a baby-sitter I am the employer and the baby-sitter should do what I ask relating to the children.
A bath is an important part of many children's routine and they should not miss out because a baby-sitter will not do it.

Wishihadabs Fri 01-Mar-13 15:37:26

I think it totally depends. We have a couple of teenagers we pay £5-6 p/h. No way do I expect them to bath/ferry from activities or supervise homework. I use them for relative late (kids already in pjs) local sitting not on a school night. Our housekeeper also babysit s as did our nanny (when we had one) I pay her £10p/h she is basically in loco parentis and will do food/bathing/homework supervision. We use her for week nights when we are both working late or for e.g.; going to parents evening. She will also do overnights if it is going to be after midnight, again something I wouldn't ask he teens to do. I did teen sitting aged 12 upwards and agency sitting as student aged 19-25 I certainly bathed and fed children when working for the agency. Not as a teenager earning £2.50 p/h (long time ago)

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