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Playdates

(5 Posts)
FantasticMissFox Tue 23-Aug-16 15:59:41

Hi All, just wondering if any mums or nannies have experienced any trouble with playdates? MB doesn't seem keen for me to have people over but I feel bad for not returning the invitation to people who've had us to their house. TIA

Callaird Tue 23-Aug-16 19:21:23

I always bring up reciprocating friends over at interview. I would and have turned down positions where MB does not want to have 'strangers' in her house. She's trusting the stranger that becomes her nanny, she should trust the nanny's judgement in who she allows into her employers home.

I also turn down positions where the employer wants to meet any new people that you may invite into their home, if she works full time, there is no opportunity for her to meet them!

I do understand where an employer is coming from, I would never ever invite someone I have just met, into my employers home, just like I'd never go to theirs. I would do meet ups outside the house until I thought I knew them well enough, maybe 6+ weeks. I also would not let the nanny/mum or child roam freely around the house! Same as I wouldn't roam around someone else's house that I am visiting or even working in!

To answer your question, I don't think there is anyway to change your employers mind unfortunately. Usually no amount of talking gets you anywhere so you either stop going to others homes/you take food or cake to others to pay your way/you ask your employer if she will stump up for reciprocal meal at a cafe or you pay at a cafe. Sorry. Live and learn!

Blondeshavemorefun Tue 23-Aug-16 20:17:21

Ditto callaird

If you trust your nanny you trust her judgement who she sees and invitees into the house

Iguessyourestuckwithme Tue 23-Aug-16 20:33:33

I always bring up reciprocating friends over at interview. I would and have turned down positions where MB does not want to have 'strangers' in her house. She's trusting the stranger that becomes her nanny, she should trust the nanny's judgement in who she allows into her employers home.

This exactly

My bosses work outside the home for 60 hours a week - they trust me to raise their children and I hope/expect that they trust my judgement over who we meet on a daily/weekly basis ie play meet ups at the park etc, who we invite to the house. Over the past 2.6 years my bosses have met other nannies/mums that I know eg when they worked from home or when children approach them at the weekends at the park etc. They are always interested in how everything is going with them, how the kids are, etc etc - in fact my boss have arranged their own playdates with people I know and I have had coffee/playdates with some of my nanny friends employers.

FantasticMissFox Wed 24-Aug-16 19:34:17

Thanks for all your replies. I feel the same. Obviously they trust me with their children so should definitely trust my judgement on who I invite over (only people I've known for a long time). I think she's just worried about mess so have made the house extra specially tidy after having people over this afternoon.

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