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how can I get a dc to listen? CM asking x

(7 Posts)
whatdoyoudoplease Tue 10-Jun-14 13:50:56

I look after a dc before and after pre school 3 days a week. He is very loud, screams a lot and generally disagrees with what everyone says even when he is blatantly wrong. He is also extremely poor at following instructions and completely ignores you when you ask him to do something to the point where you have to bend down and speak right in front of his face iyswim. He has nothing wrong with his hearing. As you can imagine, this is quite warring and I find myself feeling annoyed with him a lot. How would you approach this? Mum and Dad know but are very inconsistent. Dad is extremely harsh and Mum is very soft. Dc is 4 by the way.

Frusso Tue 10-Jun-14 14:04:24

You could try making a game about indoor and outdoor voices.

Are you certain that his hearing is okay? Often children with glue ear will try to lip-read to compensate when their hearing goes worse, so home not respondiny until you are on his level face to face with him could be due to that.

Other option is to use the KISS method (keep it simple silly) take the language you use with him right back to basics, tell him once, then allow a long processing time, then repeat exactly the same again.

DeepThought Tue 10-Jun-14 14:06:56

Getting down to his level to chat is what one would expect to do with a 4 yr old any way

Are you absolutely sure that you are not issuing multiple instructions (shoes on, coat on, get your bag please)

Model indoor and outdoor voice

Not sure about the disagree thing, is it worse because you feel the understandable need to correct him every time? How do you feel about acknowledging his P o V and chatting through stuff with him?

DeepThought Tue 10-Jun-14 14:07:53

Or what Frusso said!

whatdoyoudoplease Tue 10-Jun-14 14:56:33

Thanks for the quick replies. We do do the indoor/outdoor voices (as do pre school) although it makes no difference. The ignoring thing is what I find the most difficult. I will talk to mum about a hearing test. I do simple commands eg.'Please put your shoes on now' which I repeat again and again. I am a naturally laid back person, but i am finding this hard. I don't have to talk to the faces of other dc of this age.

Frusso Tue 10-Jun-14 17:41:31

Perhaps he's not processing the information as quick as the others, or he's just not at that stage yet, he could still be at a one word level.

Try completely basic; get his attention and give the instruction "x, shoes on"

Has his main caregiver been doing things for him? Such as putting his shoes on for him rather than teaching him to be independent? It might be that he can't do it yet?

you may have to go back a few stages in development and find out where he is stage wise rather than going by his age, and working from there.

Messygirl Tue 10-Jun-14 18:01:22

Definitely suggest a hearing test. Our DS was crying and frustrated a lot. Test showed 50% hearing loss sad

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