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advice needed(24 Posts)
i hope im in the right place ,
where do i start ?, im divorced about a year now and i have 3 kids,
11 yr old boy,
8 yr old boy
5 yr old girl, at the moment my ex wife has the kids, but recently she has said she wants to give me the kids and go her own way,
I dont want to go into the ins and outs of our break up,
so the advice i wanted was,if the kids are with me i will need a nanny live in, and obviously salary,
but i work nights 18.00 through to 03.00 ,i drive a black cab,6 nights a week, i make good money,sorry im not a lawyer or banker,
what im looking for is someone to live with us,wake up mornings dress the girl and take them to school,
evenings ill pick them up and make dinner,then go to work,
she will get a day off on mondays, ill clean and cook just someone to watch and teach them when im working.
just looking for advice on whether there would be someone willing to do this and how much,
from babysitters i talk to they say around 350 to 500 PW,
im sure people on here will know better.
thanks for taking the time to read and i look forward to replies good or bad
No advice, sorry, but you appear to have posted in the wrong section, perhaps click report and ask to be moved to parenting?
Theres a childcare section you could get it moved too.
Maybe look on childcare.co.uk to see how much nannies charge in your area.
I think you have posted in the wrong bit
Ask for your post to moved and you will get loads of of useful advice
I think most of us ending up posting in the wrong place to begin with
Hullo - we'll move this to Childcare for the OP.
I think you need to be clearer on the working hours.
Are you needing 6pm to 9am? Are you needing that every day or just some?
When you say Monday off do you mean 6pm Monday to 6pm Tuesday off, or something else?
It won't suit many people due to the night working. Whilst your children will be asleep a lot of the working hours, you need the person physically there.
May suit someone who did something else during the day, perhaps studying something.
What changes would be needed on days when there is no school? Consider what happens if school is closed, school holidays.
So you only need care at nighttime - and am assuming that your children sleep through the night
Au pairs generally work 25ish hours a week and daytime but you may find someone
Nannies again daytime unless a night nanny like me (and I charge per hour as have small babies and I'm £150 a night) tho that's coz I know baby will wake me
You may find a nanny happy To basically be paid to sleep at night and be there for your kids
Try advertising on nannyjob gumtree childcare co.uk and netmums and see what reply you get
Maybe a student
who doesn't go out partying would work out ?
You may have better luck advertising for a nanny and a weekend babysitter
I would suggest an au pair, perhaps an older one who doesn't want to go out partying. There will be quite a few who wouldn't mind looking after the children from 6pm until drop off at school and then having the whole day free to themselves. I would suggest you speak to an au pair agency to see if they have someone on their books who would suit this sort of role. I think with a nanny you will be paying for more than you require and they won't be attracted to the job as it wont suit their skills etc.
We have had both in the past and they definitely have different strengths and each suit their own skill set, if you see what I mean!
wow , thanks for all the info,
like you say looking for someone to be with kids at night, really to keep the social worker away from us, lol.
but would be 20.00 thru 09.00 hours,
6 days a week Monday she can have the whole day off,
i could afford up to £ 400 per week,
of which she would keep all of it, as accommodation and food would be provided,
from the babysitters i talk to in my cab it seems like a good long term deal.
will look at au pairs
Don't underestimate the cover you'll need for holidays and occasional illness.
Keep taxation in mind. If £400 is the budget, then what the person actually will be paid will be less as you will have Employers NI to pay, there will be payroll admin costs (though you could in theory do it yourself via HMRC PAYe tools).
It may sound a good deal but it means someone having to commit to spending 6 nights a week at your home. They won't have a social life - least not an evening one.
As they would be your employee, they would get at least 5.6 weeks paid holiday. As a cab driver I suspect you are self employed, so if they are on holiday you won't have income, yet you will still have to pay them. Look at costings over a year, not on a weekly or monthly basis.
Monday starts at 00:00 and goes to 23:59.
So are you saying you are back by 23:35 on Sunday and work from 00:00 on Tuesday?
Or are you saying they would have 20:00 Monday to 09:00 Tuesday off, plus their normal non-work hours on the Monday (so 09:00-20:00)?
When trying to find someone to do this, you will need to be really clear on when they will be and will not be working.
Are there nights where you are likely to earn more than other nights, such as New Years Eve perhaps? Would you need to insist that the nanny did not take annual leave on certain dates?
If so, be upfront about those dates.
20:00-09:00 is 13 hours. 6 eves a week, that is 78 hours a week.
Sure some of that time (perhaps half) will be sleeping but it is still very long hours and finding someone to commit to that I feel is going to be tricky.
Have any of the babysitters you have had in your cab said they would take a live-in nanny job doing that many hours work, with those start/finish hours?
How many nannies reading this now would do this job? Am I alone in saying that I would not take this job?
More like a job-share.. But that would be even more for the children to cope with.
There must be a way for this to work, but I wonder if it would mean you changing your work pattern ?
I didn't get your sense about this post. You need any helper or any nanny for your children. You should give any advertisement for your requirement dear.
loads of input thanks.
not looking that easy as i first thought,
however i have thought of just working when the kids are at school,but i know that the money would not be enough, even if i worked Saturday and just got a nanny for 1 night.
I could easily turn to the state for help with everything,
but that is not me,
I believe you have to sort out your own problems,
i will find a way, always have, from when i was young that is me, with all the advice from all of you it helps me to see the situation more clearly,
of which i truly appreciate,
How about a mix of school hours and 2 or 3 nights?
Sit down and work out what childcare you would need in 2 different scenarios and advertise both on Gumtree and see what response you receive.
I wish you luck in finding a solution and hope things work out for you and your children :-)
A mixture of days and nights may work and get an ap in for the week as get her to work 3 week day nights - cost maybe £80/100 a week as unsociable hours and maybe 2/3 overnight nannys who would work weekend nights - pay varies but if you did a bs rate of 8/10ph till midnight and then £30/50 sleepover fee then would cost maybe £80/100 a night at weekends so childcare costs be maybe £350 a week?
Don't know anything about tax credits towards childcare but you may be entitled to something
Maybe look for a granny type carer at weekends?
Childcare is hard to sort out when a single parent but even harder when unsociable hours
Maybe a nanny with own child can stay a night with their child and then obv have day free to spend with their child?
I think you'll find a good au pair through an agency. Am au pair plus works more hours for slightly more than a standard au pair fee. I recommend you speak to a few good au pair agencies.
It seems my options are not as limited has I thought.
I've came up with two ideas.
1. Have a full time au pair. To shower dress the little one feed them then go to school.
And collect them after school and feed them.
Of which I could work days 07.00 till 18:00 5 days a week.
If I need extra money will either ask her for a sat night or get someone else just for this.
2. Have an aupair to work has an aupair.
And myself will work same as my friend.
23:00 till 05:00 (these are very lucrative hours)
So put kids to bed at 21:00 hrs.shes free to do what she wants .as long has she's in the house.
I will then feed and cloth them and send them to school. Sleep and wake up in time to pick them up.
I will only find my feet when I actually get the kids and see how we work out with the aupair.
Now I need to do my homework has to what an aupair does/doest do.and what she/he expects from the family.
From what little bit of research I've done so far.
There not all busty blondes in French maids uniforms. Lol
Young people maybe British but mostly overseas who want to live with a family and improve their English. And experience another country. Also further education.
In exchange for light duties and pocket money.
my quest for knowledge goes on
David, I would call an agency as that will be a good way to get a lot of info quite quickly. I went through Childcare international based in London. The agency was good, much cheaper to go on one of the au pair sites doing all the profile checking yourself - au pair world is good.
You can hire an ap plus for more than a standard ap salary - they will do 35 hours a week.
just depends if you can find an ap/plus/mammy etc who either wants to work nights, or can/will you def change your work to days instead of nights
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