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cms - how much input should parent have on naps?

(55 Posts)
RattyRoland Tue 05-Mar-13 21:48:38

My ds is 13mo and recently started with cm two days a week. Cm is great, really like her. The only thing that troubles me is she wants ds to nap an hour at 10am and 1hr30mins at 130pm. In my experience ds won't nap at these times, so he has a routine of sleeping 1h30m at noon at home.

Cm seems quite certain she wants naps at her times but says ds cries and takes ages to settle at 130, I think because he's not tired then- he would never nap as much and so soon after the first nap at home. Ive mentioned this to cm but she suggested I do my usual routine of one noon nap at home and she'll do hers with ds.

This means he has two routines and I'm finding him hard to settle to nap, as is cm, hopefully not CIO though sad is it normal that cm does own routine and parent different and would I risk alienating a really good cm by asking her if she'll agree to nap him at noon like I do?

doughnut44 Mon 11-Mar-13 21:05:50

I wouldn't do it straight away with a new child - it happens gradually. Like weaning them off the bottle and onto food. It's amazing how quick children adapt. Got to say though - it doesn't always work so that's that out the window. It's very hard to explain in writing what I am trying to say. I have no hard and fast rules - just what I try and it always suits everyone - except when a parent asks me to keep a child awake just so they can get an early night.

catkind Fri 15-Mar-13 23:33:25

Always a contentious one doughnut. I hope parents wouldn't ask you to keep a child up "just so they can get an early night". How about "so the child can get a good night's sleep"?
Rather rubs me up the wrong way as we did have to ask nursery to not put DS down for a nap, when they thought he should still have one. It was a last resort. I would be very upset to think they thought we were asking "just to get an early night". Some children at the dropping nap stage get in a vicious circle of napping then not being able to settle at bedtime so they come in the next day even more tired, so they nap again etc etc.

doughnut44 Sat 16-Mar-13 09:28:26

This is because a child of 20 months wakes up in the night a couple of times and the parents are tired. Sorry I didn't post right. I don't believe that preventing a child sleeping during the day aids night time sleep. In my experience you just get a very ratty child

catkind Sat 16-Mar-13 12:25:48

Mine tend more to the not going to sleep till late if they sleep too much/too late in the day. I could imagine if I did by some miracle still get them to sleep at 7 then they'd wake more in the night, or rather stay awake and wake me up because they weren't drowsy enough to resettle. I certainly find that if for some reason bedtime happens too early. They're all different!
But are they suggesting this from experience of their own child when it doesn't nap, or as something to try because they don't know what else to do about night wakings? If the former I think perhaps you have to trust their experience, if the latter perhaps they should trust yours smile
But we digress... or not entirely because it's still about who gets to decide sleep routines.

Scarfmaker Mon 18-Mar-13 23:20:17

I've been childminding for nearly 12 years and between 12-1pm all my mindees have lunch. It's something I've just always done (and I have my lunch too). If a 13 month was sleeping from noon-1.30pm then that to me would mean a very late lunch, as they would wake up very hungry and then a very late dinner.

Most of the children I look after come along early so at 13 months usually have a nap between 8.30-9.30 so that they can make it through toddler group until 12-1pm when they have lunch.

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