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How do i give my Au Pair notice

(12 Posts)
sturgeo Mon 28-Jan-13 13:15:21

Hi,
We have had our Au Pair since september, our DD adores her, and overall she is pretty good, there are a few things that irritate me but I geuss thats just normal, her english is ok but not brilliant, we get by. She was due to stay for 12 mnth and mentioned to us befor Xmas that she wanted July August & Spetmeber off, we mentioned that this was during DD school holidays and this is when we needned her most, she loosely mentioned she will be going home in June, we haven't discuseed this further. I have since found anothor Au Pair, who could start end of March (as I'd like her to have settled in befor the school holidays begin), our current AP has booked and paid for an English course, she has booked flights home in May for a short holiday, which we knew about in advance,but didn't know she'd already booked the flights. I am now feeling bad that I am going to have to let her go, and guilty that we already have another AP in place. Im not sure weather to be honest with our current AP and say we have someone else, which could make her remaining time with us awkward, or make something up to spare her feelings? This is our first time having an Au Pair so its all new to me & I've probably gone about the whole thing the wrong way...!Help..!

SamSmalaidh Mon 28-Jan-13 13:19:15

What is the notice period in her contract? I would give her plenty of notice so she can find another family - or offer to pay her flight home. Tell her the truth - that you need someone to cover the summer.

Strix Mon 28-Jan-13 13:31:52

Why don't ou just say "no" to the summer hols? Then it is her choice whether she stays or goes.

whyno Mon 28-Jan-13 13:44:10

Agree with Strix, but tell her she needs to make her decision this week as you need to sort out your other arrangements. Personally, I would avoid giving load of notice as I don't think it'd be a healthy environment.

I would say that you need an AP through the holidays, and you don't want to start with a new one at that important time. Therefore, if she still intends to leave in July (end June?) that isn't going to work for you. Could she confirm this week. When she comes back, saying she still wants to leave then, I would make it clear that this is a conflict with what you had expected, given that a year lasts Sept / end Aug....and that you will need to sort out alternative arrangements.

Over to you as to when you actually give notice (we have 2 weeks in our contract), but agree with Whyno that a long period of notice may be difficult on both sides.

sturgeo Mon 28-Jan-13 13:56:35

Thanks guys,
Our contract is 4 weeks either way, as she mentioned her plans in advancesd we couldn't really say no, although we expresed our dissapointment, and now we have found a new AP keeping the current one isn't an option, i feel bad because she now has commitmnets past March and feel we'll be buggering up her plans, I guess I'm just going to have to bite the bullit and be honest - ouch I'm not looking forward to this as there is no other way - anyone lookign for an Au Pair till June ;)

LadyHarrietdeSpook Mon 28-Jan-13 14:13:52

You didn't hire her knowing she couldn't stay July/August/September off, she announced this after she arrived right?

What she is saying, then, is she is available for nine months basically not the 12 you agreed when you took her on. So she took the role knowing she couldn't/wouldn't stay for as long as you needed. Or has something come up?

Is there a risk that if you gave her the ultimatum she would jsut agree and then not return in June?

Strix Mon 28-Jan-13 14:42:43

Erm... I do actually think you bear some responsibility for not having said no to the holiday when she announced it.

When I hire an pair / nanny we sign a 12 month contract with all of the holidays agreed. So there are no surprises on either side.

Your au pair does not have a right to announce three months holiday. But, then, you didn't actually stand up and say "no" when she did.

I'm afraid I think there is some bad communication on both parts here. And I think you should have had this conversation with her before you hired another one. So, effectively you are terminating her... on what grounds? It's not redundancy because you are hiring another one. I guess as she hasn't been there very long you are within your legal right to terminate the contract. But, I'm not sure this approach is a good practice.

I would go back to the existing au pair and give her the opportunity to stay. If she takes it, I would write a contract for a fixed term with no right to terminate before hand.

sturgeo Mon 28-Jan-13 16:27:36

Hi - we thought she'd stay till September, she said she wanted to stay for 12 months, our actuall contract is for 6, (as its our first time with an AP, we thought we'd that would be the best approach)I think there are a few lessons to be learned here, and yes I do agree with you Strix we should have had this sorted from the get go, thats part of the reason I feel so bad because we haven't actually handled it very well, also I really like the other one, and her English is great, our current AP's isn't, which i have found to be more of an issue than I originally thought, another lesson learned I geuss.

SamSmalaidh Mon 28-Jan-13 16:51:09

So if the contract you have is fixed term until March, I would just let her know that you won't be renewing it then.

SoldeInvierno Mon 28-Jan-13 19:01:28

you could have said "no" to her holiday, but in reality, how could you possibly force her not to leave. She probably always knew that she was not staying for the summer and in a way, it is lucky she's told you with plenty of notice. I would just use the same level of honesty with her and tell her that she has to leave by x date.

nosferatu Wed 30-Jan-13 19:25:38

I would be honest and say your summer is very important to be covered and that you had to make this decision.
Question : I have an au pair and all we do is with verbal agreements and job description I set out in my e mails when i recruited her. Works well so far.
I have no contracts- do you make them yourselves?

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